i'm not good with words i'm sorry

And it feels like all that comes out of my mouth are apologies.
    I’m sorry.
I never do anything right, I am always messing something up.
   I’m sorry.
I don’t do enough for people, I’m not good enough sometimes.
   I’m sorry.
But I’m trying, I’m trying so hard to do things right for you.
   I’m sorry.
I want to be good enough for you, but I’m just so tired of trying.
   I’m just so tired of saying sorry.
—  sorry for being the apologetic one
2

Well that worked.

I feel like this is something my alpha!Clark would say to my omega!Bruce to fluster him in our rp. In our world, Bruce owns the Daily Planet like he does in Hush, so he visited Clark often – “Wait, do I own this one, or is that the other guy?”  

3.0 | a good way (theater au! joshua)

you would be best friends, always.  nothing would ever come between the two of you, right?

wc. just under 8.8k (whoopS) | fluff, angst, it’s all here | dedicated to my sweet choco ( @choco-seventeen ) for supporting me while writing and basically becoming this fic’s second mom

It was strange.  Weird.  Practically unfathomable and there must be some kind of mistake.  The play had those two characters as romantic leads.  The ones who slowly turn to look at each other, catch the starry glint in the other’s eye before slowly leaning in, before slowly closing their eyes, before slowly feeling their heartbeat accelerate because oh heavens this is it—before slowly kissing each other for the first time with such tender passion some members of the audience start to cry.

Those roles were not ever meant for the ones who have been friends since seventh grade, where one of them accidentally tripped and tossed their lunch all over the other, rendering the former an apologetic mess and the latter slightly smelling of garlic for the rest of the day.  Not for the ones who stayed up far too late binge watching whole seasons of anime because they finally turned in that big project and it’s in fate’s hands now.  Definitely not friends who are each other’s best friends, always.  Never them.

But when the director swings back to the two of you, the mischievous and excited glint in his eye is unmistakable.  His giddiness even bubbles over and he repeats himself, happily gazing between you and the best friend of 6 years standing beside you.  "Joshua, [Y/N], you’ll be the best two leads this stage has ever seen.“

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anonymous asked:

have you watched The Roundtables video (The "Just Enjoy the Show" Argument and Steven Universe - Vox Box)

Well, I just watched it because of this ask, and I gotta say … Definitely an eye-opener! It was interesting to hear about criticism from that perspective.

I really hope I haven’t come off as that “just enjoy the show” type of guy. I’m fairly sure I’ve pushed the fact that criticism is okay and healthy everytime we bring up this subject.

I’ve simply been expressing how tiring it has been for me, personally, when I’ve really been enjoying the show in contrast to a lot of other people lately with all these critics just flooding the fandom en masse.

I have qualms with SU too! I’m pretty sure everyone does. In fact, I’d probably make posts about it too if there weren’t so many other people doing it and taking it so seriously instead of having fun with it.

There are SU crits who do have a lot of valid points, and their view is just as important as anyone else’s. I’m actually a lot more likely to read a crit post if it’s brought up with that kind of concern and confusion, instead of another one of those ‘Peridot is shrinking’ or ‘Lapis is too bright’ posts.

I guess another thing is a lot of SU crits give off this high-and-mighty air that just rubs me the wrong way? But that’s just a personal thing.

Either way, I’m still enjoying the show, and I’m still a positive blog. But I’ll try to make it more clear that I’m calling out baseless, drama-seeking, SU-hating crits instead of critics who express concerns while still enjoying the show.


tl;dr - Don’t love the show so much that you can’t see it’s flaws. Don’t hate the flaws so much that you can’t see the show.

(Click here to watch AwestruckVox’s video!)

1. hey, i’m lonely.
2. i mean, you’re beautiful.
3. i mean, i bet we can make something beautiful from all this.
4. look, isn’t this so good? don’t you feel so whole? let’s never hurt each other, alright?
5. just stay quiet, it’ll make this easier.
6. we’re young and we have an excuse to be stupid. let’s blame your father and my mother and pretend it doesn’t matter.
7. it doesn’t matter.
8. it doesn’t matter.
9. it hurts because it’s supposed to, that’s all.
10. i hate the way you kiss me, i hate the way you whisper, i hate the way this feels.
11. but baby, you’re still beautiful.
12. i love you i love you i love you
13.
14.
15.
16. is that what this is called?
—  15 THINGS || s.o.
I still have bad days. Days when I come home and, in the comfort of my own room, feel the need to wear black and fold into the smallest version of myself. I still have these hours of complete silence, when I am empty and drained of everything that once made me whole. I still have those raging fits of anger and sadness when I destroy the world around me and sob as I watch it crumble. I still have a devastating appreciation for sad songs, and tragedy is a familiar comfort. If I’m being completely honest death still crosses my mind as an all too forgiving escape. If it seems like I’m unhappy, I’m not. These are just some bad days. I still have bad days.
—  Good Life Bad Days
Roasted Marshmallows

pairing: Jimin x reader
word count: 1177
genre: fluff
summary: Jimin would learn to love the smell of marshmallows.
warnings: none
a/n: inspired by this prompt b/c i have terrible writer’s block right now. y’all know any fluff i write is absolute shit that i wish would sink into the very bottom of the deep and dark ocean blue, but here i am. this is dedicated to the cute bun @everyonegetsmeaheartbeatcloser. i really hope this brightens up your day a lil bit. i wasn’t sure who your bias is and i didn’t want to ask since i wanted it to be a surprise so i just wrote for Jimin b/c i don’t think i’ve ever met a person who doesn’t like him?? also, did you know the thingy that connects a plane to the gate of an airport is called a jet bridge?! anyways, enjoy~

Originally posted by jitaeme

(not my gif)

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Allen Walker and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

I lie awake here,
head replaying intimate
memories of us.
—  a haiku written by yours truly @tinyhaikuqueen

anonymous asked:

au where angels go to confession

spem in alium

I. 
“I do hold regular hours for Reconciliation,” Daniel said, tugging at his collar with a free hand. (It had been bothering him all afternoon–vestments might hide that extra five pounds, but the clerical collar was much less forgiving.) “Mondays and Fridays at 5:30, it says so on our website. You don’t have to interrupt my gardening.”

“I know,” the angel said, and Daniel could hear the shifting of its wings as it found a comfortable place on the grass. “But I prefer this to the confessional.”

Daniel reached down and yanking out a weedy tangle from the flowerbed, tossing it onto the steadily-growing pile. “I’m not even sure I can hear your confession, you know. I was commissioned to absolve the frailty of men, not…”

“So you said last time. And the time before.”

Daniel sighed heavily and sat back on the grass, wiping his hands on his pants. The angel was sitting half a yard away, sifting a handful of dirt through its fingers idly. At his gaze, it straightened up, puffing out the wings around its face. The tongue of flame over its forehead sputtered, then flared brighter–in a strange way, it reminded Daniel of a woman fidgeting with her hair.

Daniel bit back a smile. “So?” he said. “Let’s hear it.”

The angel’s lipless mouth twisted in displeasure, and the bright coils around its arms roiled. “’Let’s hear it’? Is that how you begin all your confessions?”

“Well, you didn’t like ‘in the name of the Father,’ so I thought I’d try something different this time.”

The angel watched the last of the dirt slip through its fingers, then looked up at him. Its eyes were dark and deep as space, starless and cold. “There is a woman who tends a small garden behind my building. As she passed me in the hall, I blessed her knees to keep them from aching–that she might enjoy the sunshine and not think of how her daughter had not called this week.”

Daniel bit back a smile. “I see. And you feel such an action is in need of forgiveness?”

The bands of light around the angel’s arms were undulating slowly, like waves. “My orders are not to interfere with my Father’s creation.”

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.

Title: Coffee Shop First Dates

Pairing: Clary Fray/Lydia Branwell

Rating: PG

Summary: Clary shoved her hands in her pockets as she stood near the counter. Simon had walked away from her to go help customers, leaving her alone as she waited for Lydia to arrive. She felt nervous, but didn’t know why she felt so nervous. It was just Lydia.

A/N: This was written for my TMI Femslash Bingo square: First Date, and for Shadowhunters AU Mondays prompt: Coffee Shop.

2016 is almost over, so it’s That time of the year and i’ve decided to make an appreciation post for those of you who constantly brighten my dash and my day! 

this is just a thank you for bringing A+ content to my dash every day, whether it’s original content creators or just blogs with amazing content, thank you for just being here giving me the opportunity to be with people that share my love for bangtan ♡

i’m not following a lot of blogs but i appreciate each and every one of you, thank you so much and happy new year!!

every blog is a fave so i won’t bold or anything

a-g

@apgujeon @baobwi @booptae @busanie @bwibelle @bwiseoks @chimchams @chimcheroo @chimines @cloudyhoshi @cypherkookie @dearkook @diytae @dreamyoongi @eridanianada @glitchyoongi @gotjimin 

h-l

@hobipd @jeonsify @jiminrolls @jminies @kthmyg  

m-r

@nikkmonoxyls @ojjeon @pjmjjk @rapdaegu

s-z

@sosjimin @syubprince @syubtae @vmn @whyparkjimin @wydkook @yesung @yoongles @yoonmin @yuunki

+ blogroll

anonymous asked:

Why do you dislike Leon Edel?

First of all, I do not hate Leon Edel like I hate David Herbert Donald.  Donald, I hope, is in the circle of Hell reserved for terrible historians.  (In this circle of hell, the sinners spend all eternity hearing their historiographical crimes read out as they are forced to walk back and forth across a room carpeted with Legos.  Dante…skipped that circle, for some reason.  But I digress.)  No, I probably don’t hate Leon Edel.  He just knew how to push every single one of my buttons.

Edel wrote a five-volume biography of Henry James, between 1953 and 1972.  A monumental work.  A weirdly Freudian work.  A work that manages, in all its many pages, to get queer history monumentally wrong.  A work that manages to deftly skate around the issue of James’s sexuality and end with a noncommittal shrug on the subject.  While he was writing, James’s intensely passionate letters to Paul Zhukovsky, a Russian aristocrat, showed up out of nowhere.  Edel debated going back to include them, but he decided they were unimportant to his narrative about James as impotent and celibate and so left them out.  I think I’ll allow my preferred (and much more recent) James biographer, Sheldon M. Novick, take it from here, hitting the nail on the head as always.  In 1996, Edel published a scathing attack against Novick’s then-new biography, Henry James: The Young Master, in Slate, to which Novick responded as follows (emphasis mine because HOLY SHIT):

Dear Leon Edel:

      I was startled to find in SLATE last week your intemperate and rather personal diatribe about my book Henry James: The Young Master. Whatever your reasons, you have allowed yourself to be provoked into saying outrageous things, and I have no choice but to answer plainly.
      Your remarks focus obsessively on Henry James’ sexuality. This is your obsession, not mine. You dwell on a single sexual encounter that takes no more than a page in my book and is not referred to again.
      What I do say in my book, and give considerably more prominence–and what you fail to mention–is that your own biography of James is no longer useful. For a modern reader, it badly distorts the record of the novelist’s life. I point out numerous errors and outright inventions in your work, mistakes you give a fair sample of in your SLATE story. Contrary to what you say, there was not just one incident but a lifelong friendship between James and Paul Zhukovsky. The surviving letters span 20 years. I don’t say they had an affair; that is your own fantasy. I quote and cite letters that you say I omit. And so on.
      You do yourself no credit by these exaggerated denunciations, and you make it difficult for me to respond with the respect that would otherwise be due your age and position. Your own much-praised biography was a product of its time. In it you took the standpoint of Freudian theory, circa 1940, and claimed to know James’ unconscious motives. You rejected his own statements of fact and intention, and relied instead on Freud, your higher authority. So confident were you of your theory and your exclusive access to the James papers that you made it almost a point of principle to write without checking your sources, and you gave few citations. For all these reasons, scholars are now reconstructing the story of James’ life from primary materials, to which they have access for the first time. My book summarizes a great deal of work done by others, as well as my own research–a point you neglect to mention. It would be more graceful for you to let a younger generation explore the data and form our own conclusions.
      You are correct, therefore, when you say I seek to overturn “half a century of scholarship”–at least, I mean to overturn some of the misconceptions created during the 40 years during which you controlled access to the James family papers, grew accustomed to making outrageous statements like those you have just aimed at me, and repressed independent scholarship with legendary vindictiveness.
      As you will see if you read it, my book is devoted largely to a discussion of James’ intellectual development and his stories, novels, and critical essays. James’ sexual orientation is necessarily portrayed, and I take it for granted–as most scholars do now–that he was a closeted gay man. I don’t think you have ever really disputed this, but you now seem to be shying away from its implications. In your story you hint that James was impotent, and you quote a bizarre, homophobic pronouncement by a doctor who examined James once when he was ill and away from home, then announced to a breathless world that the famous novelist was badly hung. (You omit the more bizarre and self-discrediting portions of the announcement.)
      The point of all this seems to be for you to deny that James, although his principal affections were for men, ever had sexual contact with a man. As to the sexual encounter with Holmes that so excited the editors of SLATE, you completely misstate both James’ account and my own. James refers in a notebook entry to a “divine, unique” initiation that it would be “fatal, impossible” to enlarge upon in print (he is making notes for a book). Accordingly he quickly passes on to other memories. You want there to be only one memory–of literary events–but this reading does not seem possible. Even James, for all his fondness for florid language, would not describe receiving a letter of acceptance from the North American Review (it was not even his first published work) and a call from E.L. Godkin as a “divine, unique” initiation that would be “fatal, impossible” to recall in print.
      Holmes’ involvement in what was more likely a sexual encounter is obliquely referred to in another memoir, not the notebook entry as you claim. In this second account, which I cited clearly enough but you ignore, James recalls the same time and place as the “initiation” and, in a welter of sexual imagery, evokes a picture of Holmes being put to bed. This might be just James’ fantasy, but it was more probably a casual contact between two young men who had been drinking. I give it less than a page. That’s it. Lighten up, professor.

Sincerely yours,
Sheldon M. Novick
Vermont Law School

Someone should run some cool water over those burns Novick just inflicted.  That’s one of the best historian-vs.-historian smackdowns I have ever seen. So yeah, it seems Edel was not a very nice man and he made some big, weird mistakes.  He might be in Historian Hell, for all I know.  Apart from royally fucking up the gay thing and incurring the unmitigated wrath of Sheldon Novick, Edel pushed yet another button.  As many problems as I have with Edwin P. Hoyt, who published the last major biography of Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr. in 1979, I do have to agree with him when he writes of going toe-to-toe with Edel in the notes of his book:

When I asked Leon Edel, the biographer of Henry James, how he would place Holmes in the land of letters, he said that Holmes was not a literary man but “an amateur.”  Not really.  Dilettante, yes.  Amateur, no.  And particularly as a writer, Holmes was probably the most hardheaded professional of all those who began in The Atlantic.  He was a strict taskmaster with himself and with his editors.  And if he felt that he was being underpaid for any effort, he never hesitated to do so, even to hint that he was ready to take his wares elsewhere.

The goddamn cherry on top of Edel’s big pile of pushed buttons is that he flippantly (and erroneously) dismisses the man of whom I dream of writing the next major biography.

Hell, maybe Edel does have his floor of Legos, after all.

kimonofuck  asked:

bc i'm a dick i'm going to ask for your detailed opinion on 91 days, your fav characters, possible least fav-characters, anything that you can think of!! include pics too!! and would you recommend it to your followers??

bby u arent a dick u the best. u loyal. i appreciate u. and this ask. (pistin vähä paremmaks ko pistän gifei enkä kuvii;P en vaa oikeest jaksa tallentaa mitää kuvii HEH)

anyway.. lol SPOILERS!!
91 days!!! what a magnificent story.

Originally posted by ho-humhumdrum

i honestly can not believe they were able to do all that in just 12 episodes. that they were able to make me care for so many of the characters so quick. i absolutely love angelo’s character. he’s not good at all by any means but still his quest to avenge for the death of his father, mother and little brother really makes you feel for him. he’s so bitter and empty and just really interesting in my opinion. the fact that he was so perfectly able to claim nero’s trust is amazing to me. the whole time i was watching the show i mostly felt bad for almost every character i saw on screen. i’ve never been too interested in media that contains mafia or something like that.. the whole concept of mafia is so disgusting to me i rarely enjoy anything that has something to do with it. but 91 days was one of the only “mafia shows” i’ve ever enjoyed. and even though alcohol was a big topic in this anime i managed not to care about it too much so that’s also good lmao.

even if the animation was kind of shit most of the time (i feel like that’s the case with most animes nowadays tbh) i rly enjoyed the style and the character designs. especially angelo, corteo, vanno and nero! the eyes were brilliant and i liked the old timey clothes and shit oh man. also the expressions of the characters at some points (especially angelo’s) were just absolutely perfect and they really created a nice atmosphere for the scenes.

Originally posted by chunli

fave character’s must be angelo and vanno. i also really liked corteo, nero, volpe, fio, frate, cerotto and luce lol. these characters were the ones that i felt the most for and i would’ve hugged them all if i could have the chance lol. and i rly enjoyed fango even tho he was creepy lmao!! i wouldn’t call him one of my faves but his character was interesting. honestly i wish we could’ve had more interactions between some of the characters for example nero and vanno!

Originally posted by keigoo

my least faves…. hhmm. probably going to go with vincent. he had too little screen time and whenever he was on screen he was either dying of coughing or he was just boring. i kind of rly wanted him to be more than he was. he just… said a few words and then got a rly anti-climactic end????? i felt bad for nero but god i would’ve maybe felt even worse if i would’ve known anything about vincent.

Originally posted by thenichibro

idk what else to say without spoiling tooooooooo much of the anime!!!! i rly enjoyed it and i’m glad @kimonofuck and @oikawaiiii made me watch it. i had planned to watch it when it came out but then i didn’t have any energy lol, anyway.. the anime left a few questions unanswered but i guess that’s not a bad thing! i just rly hope i could’ve know a bit more about the characters and the story but yeah.. 

i would totally suggest watching it if you like these kind of animes.
maybe if you only enjoy moe stuff and shit like that then this anime might not be your cup of tea but!!! to anyone who likes mysteries and mafias and complex characters this might be a nice anime^^

anyway bby thank for this ask i hope this is a good answer<3

BBbYyEE~~~~

Originally posted by mobpsycho100