i'm not dead let's have dinner

Can you imagine

The Inner Circle having dinner, and then Feyre or someone goes “Well, I guess it’s only a matter of time before the bond snap for Nesta, right?" 

And Nesta says, "it had already snapped" 

And everyone goes WHAT 

And Nesta just says, deadpan, "well, I felt it ages ago, but over my dead body I would let some stupid bound decide who I end up with, so I just ignored" 

And everyone just stares at her and Cassian just stand there, utterly shocked, having a mental breakdown 

remember scott snyder’s batman run, and how bruce had planned on having a never-ending line of clones of himself implanted with his memories ascend to bathood until they die and are replaced with the next bruce? emotional issues in a cowl, but ad infinitum. like, you know, the exact sort of thing that sounds like eternal torment. the intentional damnation of an infinite number of yourself. batman, but it’s like you’re doing laundry, because everyone knows you are literally never done with the laundry, ever. so, yeah, remember that?

i don’t remember all of the logistics of it, but, correct me if i’m wrong, the prior bruce is supposed to train the new bruce, who emerges freshly hatched at prime batman age with all of bruce’s knowledge and memories, only needing to learn how to crack open a can of whoop ass. training his muscles, and all. i understand this is comic books, and nothing is literal, everything is subjective, but i want you to think about this literally for a minute. just consider. please. do it for me. first thing, Old Man Bruce has to teach his new hatchling self to fight, and there is no way that’s going well. second thing, Old Man Bruce is doing that, again, ad infinitum. these hatchling bruces are not going to have a very good workplace environment. bruce is a dick. the bruce hatchlings don’t even have the benefit of being loved to save them from bruce’s supreme dickishness.

second thing, bruce’s massive family is presumably going to be alive for this. how the hell do you respond to something like this. how do you fucking do that, man. how. you come to thanksgiving dinner and discover it’s not skeletons hiding in dad’s closet, it’s a younger version of himself that he’s super mean to all the time. how do… how the hell do you even respond to that other than asking, “how the hell do i even respond to this?” furthermore, this massive family could spread into a more massive family, and are they just going to ignore the fact that their great great great great great great grandad has achieved immortality by being The Bat That Eats Itself And Lives Forever? what do you do when you come to christmas dinner and, aw, shucks, it looks like Your Grandfather, Model 457, died, and has been replaced by model 458. what the fuck do you even do. this is fucking hilarious.

………… do you think there’s a mass grave of dead bruce clones? does bruce clone mark 69064 have a grief ritual for his dead predecessor other than, “bye, you vicious motherfucker, no one loved you,” or? what is this. what

ravenisthegem  asked:

Alright alright so I saw that post of yours that was an imagine your otp and it was that ad that was like "I'm a 28yr old felon and I'll pretend to be your boyfriend to disappoint your parents on thanksgiving if you let me have your food" I want to try to write it but I'm brain dead. Would you happen to have headcanons for that? :)

For those who don’t know, we are referring to this post

Okay, so Steve answers the ad because he’s desperate, okay?  His mom and all of his friends won’t get off his case about dating ever since his ex dumped him, and he finally snaps one day and accidentally blurts out that he already has a (non-existent) boyfriend. 

Of course, Sarah Rogers insists that Steve bring him to Thanksgiving dinner. 

Steve stumbles upon the ad by chance, and the guy sounds a little insane, but he lives in the same neighborhood Steve is in, so he sets up a meeting with him in a well-known coffeeshop, so if Steve is attacked, there would be plenty of witnesses. 

So Steve’s nervously waiting in the crowded shop when a guy around his age walks in, and Steve is surprised that this is the man from the ad because he’s actually well put together and quite handsome. 

At first, Tony’s in disbelief that Steve had answered his ad because the man is gorgeous and after a few minutes of conversation, it’s obvious that Steve is smart, but whatever.  Okay, Tony could do this.  They spend the rest of the day just getting to know each other, and for a while, they both forget that this is actually for pretend. 

So they get to Steve’s mom’s house for dinner, and they’re immediately bombarded with hugs and kisses and questions upon questions about how they met and how long they’ve been dating, etc. etc. Steve is super embarrassed, but Tony thinks it’s actually really cute. 

And idk, Sarah warms up to Tony right away, and most of Steve’s friends seem to like him too, but Bucky is the one that remains unconvinced, just because up until a few days ago, he had no idea that Tony was even in Steve’s life.  And hmmmmm maybe they ask Tony what he does for a living, and he accidentally lets it slip that he’s the son of the CEO of Stark Industries, and everyone’s all wide-eyed because wtf?  How can you just casually drop that?  And Steve asks if they can be excused for a moment and they hide out in his old room and Tony admits that he isn’t actually poor or a criminal or anything like that–his dad just got really pissed at him and disowned him, and Tony didn’t feel like spending Thanksgiving by himself.