I’m not really okay today. After a 5 week battle in the ICU, I lost my grandma last night. After coming home from the hospital around 2am, sleep wasn’t going to happen. My body hurt from crying and my mind was racing while I tried to lay quietly. And I missed missed missed my grandma. But it was too dark and I wanted light. I wanted to see the sun. Two minutes to log on, and there it was. Beorn carried me along all the beaches and up the hills and we followed the sun.
Star Stable Online has helped me through so many things in the last two years. When my herniated disc was crushing my sciatic nerve so terribly last October-February and I couldn’t even walk more than a few minutes, leaving me couch and bed bound my life on pause, SSO gave me the ability to explore and adventure. During my dad’s mother’s battle with lung cancer at the same time, SSO gave me an outlet for my depression. Even if I couldn’t get up and do the most basic thing or help at her house, at least I could help in this fantasy battle against a squid demon and max my horses. That was enough fulfillment to get me through physical therapy and back to life. This community gave me the human interaction I desperately desired as well as give me some amazing, loving friends to cherish.
I told Lea last night, this game makes me feel free. I have Gwendolyn to take me away to somewhere else, and my pixel pons to carry me upward and forward and downward. It probably seems strange, but this game means so much more to me than just a game. It’s given me so much joy and comfort. Even when I take breaks and the game goes through dry spells, I think I’ll always come back to Jorvik. There is a whole lot of good there and it’s special to me. I’ll need it again this week.