i'm laughing so hard at the names

GET IN MY BUSINESS PLEASE:
  1. The meaning behind my url:
  2. A picture of me:
  3. How many tattoos i have and what they are:
  4. Last time i cried and why:
  5. Piercings i have:
  6. Favorite band:
  7. Biggest turn offs:
  8. Top 5 (insert subject):
  9. Tattoos i want:
  10. Biggest turn ons:
  11. Age:
  12. Ideas of a perfect date:
  13. Life goal:
  14. Piercings i want:
  15. Relationship status:
  16. Favorite movie:
  17. A fact about my life:
  18. Phobia:
  19. Middle name:
  20. Height:
  21. Are you a virgin?
  22. What’s your shoe size?
  23. What’s your sexual orientation?
  24. Do you smoke, drink, or take any drugs?
  25. Someone you miss:
  26. What’s one thing you regret?
  27. First celebrity you think of when someone says attractive:
  28. Favorite ice cream?
  29. One insecurity:
  30. What my last text message says:
  31. Have you ever taken a picture naked?
  32. Have you ever painted your room?
  33. Have you ever kissed a member of the same sex?
  34. Have you ever slept naked?
  35. Have you ever danced in front of your mirror?
  36. Have you ever had a crush?
  37. Have you ever been dumped?
  38. Have you ever stole money from a friend?
  39. Have you ever gotten in a car with people you just met?
  40. Have you ever been in a fist fight?
  41. Have you ever snuck out of your house?
  42. Have you ever had feelings for someone who didn’t have them back?
  43. Have you ever been arrested?
  44. Have you ever made out with a stranger?
  45. Have you ever met up with a member of the opposite sex somewhere?
  46. Have you ever left your house without telling your parents?
  47. Have you ever had a crush on your neighbor?
  48. Have you ever ditched school to do something more fun?
  49. Have you ever slept in a bed with a member of the same sex?
  50. Have you ever seen someone die?
  51. Have you ever been on a plane?
  52. Have you ever kissed a picture?
  53. Have you ever slept in until 3?
  54. Have you ever love someone or miss someone right now?
  55. Have you ever laid on your back and watched cloud shapes go by?
  56. Have you ever made a snow angel?
  57. Have you ever played dress up?
  58. Have you ever cheated while playing a game?
  59. Have you ever been lonely?
  60. Have you ever fallen asleep at work/school?
  61. Have you ever been to a club?
  62. Have you ever felt an earthquake?
  63. Have you ever touched a snake?
  64. Have you ever ran a red light?
  65. Have you ever been suspended from school?
  66. Have you ever had detention?
  67. Have you ever been in a car accident?
  68. Have you ever hated the way you look?
  69. Have you ever witnessed a crime?
  70. Have you ever pole danced?
  71. Have you ever been lost?
  72. Have you ever been to the opposite side of the country?
  73. Have you ever felt like dying?
  74. Have you ever cried yourself to sleep?
  75. Have you ever sang karaoke?
  76. Have you ever done something you told yourself you wouldn’t?
  77. Have you ever laughed until something you were drinking came out your nose?
  78. Have you ever slept with someone at least 5 years older or younger?
  79. Have you ever kissed in the rain?
  80. Have you ever sang in the shower?
  81. Have you ever made out in a park?
  82. Have you ever dream that you married someone?
  83. Have you ever glued your hand to something?
  84. Have you ever got your tongue stuck to a flag pole?
  85. Have you ever ever gone to school partially naked?
  86. Have you ever been a cheerleader?
  87. Have you ever sat on a roof top?
  88. Have you ever brush your teeth?
  89. Have you ever ever too scared to watch scary movies alone?
  90. Have you ever played chicken?
  91. Have you ever been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on?
  92. Have you ever been told you’re hot by a complete stranger?
  93. Have you ever broken a bone?
  94. Have you ever been easily amused?
  95. Have you ever laughed so hard you cried?
  96. Have you ever mooned/flashed someone?
  97. Have you ever cheated on a test?
  98. Have you ever forgotten someone’s name?
  99. Have you ever met someone who didn’t seem real?
  100. Have you ever give us one thing about you that no one knows.
JOOaaannn FAbriccsss
WTNV - Well of Night
JOOaaannn FAbriccsss

okay but this scene was so perfect it aged me back like five years

The Tale Of How A Girl Scout Stole From Me

So listen– 

My roommate in college is a Girl Scout leader, and her scouts really wanted to explore a dorm room because they think it’s cool, being in college and all. So I let these girls in my room, just kind of smiling and them being really excited and thinking it was rad and such. Now I was sitting in my lofted bed the entire time, so I wasn’t really paying that much attention when they were looking at my stuff underneath me. One was crouching below me, while another one was talking to me, distracting me (we’ll get to her later), and then the other one came back up, and she stopped talking to me. After they leave, I get out of the bed to close our blinds. The cord is right by where I keep all my gems and rocks that I collect, and I noticed my palm-size citrine was missing. I looked on the floor, around it and everything and could not find any shards from a fall or anything. It wouldn’t have been that big a deal had I not just got it a week ago from my aunt who got it for me because of the meanings and spiritual stuff surrounding it, so it means a lot to me. 

I didn’t want to jump to conclusions, but I texted my roommate asking if by any chance one of the girls had accidentally picked it up or something, and I didn’t get a response. 

Now I was on a time limit because if the meeting ended and all the girls went their separate ways, I would probably lose this rock forever. It shouldn’t have been that big a deal, but at this point I just needed to know if a ten year old stole from me. 

I called my roommate after she didn’t respond for about fifteen minutes, and finally she answered and said she read the texts and she was asking them at that exact moment. None were ‘fessing up. But then one said “I have one exactly like that, that size, that color, but I brought it from home.” My roommate immediately knew there was some shady shit going on there, so she asked to see it. This kid opens up this flimsy little folder and had stuffed my rock away into the little pocket. My roommate took picture of it, and me, being oblivious to what the situation was, confirmed that was my rock and I was so glad it was found. Even after that, she kept with the story, kept saying it was hers, got it from home, so on. And THE OTHER GIRL FROM EARLIER was defending her saying “Yea, that’s her rock, she showed me earlier” and I feel so used??? By ten year olds?? Bamboozled?? They plotted against me to take my rock, they had a plan and everything? I had so much shit underneath my bed and on the window sill, tsum tsum’s, hello kitty stuff, candy, things I wouldn’t notice were missing, but they had to pull the ultimate heist. Thinking they can get away with it. I think not.

It gets better.

Then her dad shows up. She immediately twisted her story into that she had gotten from school. Where from school? Her locker. How’d it get into her locker? She said she didn’t know, it just showed up one day. The dad kept interrogating her, but she was not budging. My roommate said that she would bring the rock to have me look at it, and that we would look to make sure that I hadn’t just misplaced mine, and she would bring it back if it was not mine, trying to be like a good leader, like she is, but the little girl responded with “Well it’s mine, but she can have it” trying make me look bad.

Now, it’s been a few hours since then, and we just got an email from one of the parents saying she had confessed and her reason was because she has low self-esteem. The subject line was “‘Her name’ and the Rock” and I don’t think I’ve laughed that hard in a while.

TL;DR: Lesson learned, don’t trust Girl Scouts, don’t bring them into your home. You will be ROBBED and you’ll never want to buy another girl scout cookie in your life.

wat-watson  asked:

There's a song called "I'm not gay" by J pee. I haven't listened to it yet, but did John make his rapper name into J Pee because that's his jam

30 seconds in I exited right outta there

I ended up watching until the end and I’m laughing so hard tears are in my eyes

I am SO MAD at you for not only making me watch this video, but now my youtube is recommending it over and over again XD

(j/k ilu)

youtube

I feel like i’m the only one who listens to this song

here’s a compilation of highlight hitting eachother’s bare ass’ on live tv. when have your faves ever?!?!?!

it was punishment if you didn’t say “highlight” before calling someone’s name. then if you laughed you got slapped. kikwang hit’s doojoon’s butt so hard that it was still red when yoseob hit it at the end like 10 minutes later

I love the look in your eye when you’re about to pull another dad joke. I absolutely adore the way your laugh brings out the glow in your face. I can’t get enough of the way you work so hard and have achieved so much and yet manage to be some of the most humble people I had the opportunity to know.

Tuukka Rask

Tuukka Rask enter a Starbucks and orders an Awake tea latte. The barista asks for his name, and then how to spell it. Tuukka rolls his eyes and answers, “two U’s, two K’s”. He receives his tea moments later. Uukk is written on the cup. Tuukka throws a milk crate across the Starbucks in frustration. He is banned from the establishment.

The signs as things my friends as the signs have said pt. 2
  • Aries: OPEN UP THE FUCKING PIT!
  • Taurus: I have no clue who's socks these are but I'm wearing them. They were in my drawer! They have the name Michael written on them! I don't know a Michael!
  • Gemini: Apparently, they thought I was super calm... When in reality was losing it on the outside, about to go off on the customer.
  • Cancer: Sorry, I was napping.
  • Leo: I'm running off of three hours of sleep and I haven't eaten in almost 24 hours. What's new with you?
  • Virgo: *Sings off key then proceeds to laugh so hard we almost wreck*
  • Libra: I will fucking cockslap her if she tries me.
  • Scorpio: I decided to get back at her. I hit her in the head with a wiffle ball twice... and I did some other stuff...
  • Sagittarius: Why am I the goblin woman? I don't wanna be the goblin woman!
  • Capricorn: So, I saw his car was there and I shit on his windshield. So yeah, that happened...
  • Aquarius: Yes daddy I do!
  • Pisces: I ended up spending $250 on lush products... I do NOT! have an addiction!
8

me and my pal were drunk and did these…
happy valentine’s day everyone!!

Summary of Hamilton Songs
  • Alexander Hamilton: Yo I'm Alexander Hamilton and these are all the bitches I've fucked and/or fucked up
  • Aaron Burr, Sir: Let's see how many things rhyme with Burr (also BRRAAAAH BRRAAAAH)
  • My Shot: Hamilton's not throwing away his shot or the fucking mike like holy shit this song is good
  • The Story of Tonight: We are best buds and this song is in no way foreshadowing sad events what are you talking about lets have another round
  • The Schuyler Sisters: WERK BITCH
  • Farmer Refuted: Hamilton: "My dog speaks more eloquently" Everybody: "OOOOOHH!"
  • You'll Be Back: The king's an abusive boyfriend who can't let things go and is also really cute--DA DA DA DA DA
  • Right Hand Man: HERE COMES THE GENERAL MOTHERFUCKERS
  • A Winter's Ball: We're reliable wITH THE LADIES!!!
  • Helpless: Eliza is a cinnamon roll who needs her happy ending stfu
  • Satisfied: Angelica fucking wrecks it like holy shit this song will bring me back to life
  • The Story of Tonight Reprise: "She's married to a British officer" "Oh shit..."
  • Wait For It: And we all fall in love with Burr cuz he tears this shit up
  • Stay Alive: "I'm a general! WEEEEEEEEEE!!!" (And Hamilton will fight anyone like holy shit boy calm the fuck down)
  • Ten Duel Commandments: The awesome sounding counting game of fUCKING DEATH
  • Meet Me Inside: Hamilton gets called to the principals office
  • That Would Be Enough: Dude seriously Eliza just wants you to not fucking die like how hard is that
  • Guns and Ships: Just...I just can't...just listen to this one fucking french asshole give it all he's got
  • History Has Its Eyes On You: Basically Washington telling Hamilton not to fuck up
  • The World Turned Upside Down: America wins the war and this shit is intense (also "Immigrants, we get the job done")
  • What Comes Next: The king is still bitter--"AWESOME! WOW!"
  • Dear Theodosia: Dads and their kids make me cry every time also we see parallels between Burr and Hamilton like holy shit this is cool
  • Non-Stop: Hamilton slow down you're scaring ppl
  • What'd I Miss: Jefferson arrives 15 minutes late with Starbucks
  • Cabinet Battle #1: EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY
  • Take A Break: Ok am I the only one who notices the beat of nothing when the sisters are like "Angelica, Eliza...the Schuyler sisters" like where the fuck is Peggy is she dead i think she's dead holy shit NO
  • Say No To This: Hamilton you dumb fuck say no to this
  • ...also Maria can belt like you won't believe
  • The Room Where It Happens: Burr is done with everyone's shit (also this song is life)
  • Schuyler Defeated: Burr drops some major foreshadowing with "I swear your pride will be the death of us all"
  • Cabinet Battle #2: "...France"
  • Washington on Your Side: Hamilton better watch his back
  • "Southern motherfuckin' dEMOCRATIC-REPUBLICANS!" "OH"
  • One Last Time: Washington has had enough of everyone's shit and is going home (like seriously he's the smartest person in this play he leaves before shit hits the fan)
  • I Know Him: Oh King George! We were wondering how you were doing...still creepy?...ok moving on
  • The Adams Administration: "Sit down John, you fat motherFUCKER"
  • We Know: Hamilton fucks up and no one's surprised at this point (also I love the little "No one else was in the room where it happened" addition from Burr like it just rubs salt in the wound here for their "friendship")
  • Hurricane: More Hamilton backstory/Wait For It Reprise
  • The Reynolds Pamphlet: SHIT HAS HIT THE FAN I REPEAT SHIT HAS HIT THE GODDAM FAN (also Angelica: "I'm not here for you" Everyone: "Oooooohhh!")
  • Burn: Ok let me just say Lin-Manuel Miranda has done such a good job with Eliza's character like for someone who we don't know anything about history wise, he really brought her to life in ways that make me want to cry
  • Blow Us All Away Reprise: philip no
  • philip no
  • PHILIP NO (also ha ha ha with the name of the song ha ha ha I'm laughing so hard I'm crying)
  • Stay Alive Reprise: WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
  • It's Quiet Uptown: I'm dead there's no god there's no light at the end of the tunnel everything's helpless and there are tears flooding my cheeks
  • The Election of 1800: Everyone is thirsting after Hamilton like leave the man alone at this point dear god
  • Your Obedient Servant: Burr and Hamilton are passive aggressive af
  • Best of Wives and Best of Women: I HOPE HAMILTON REALIZES HOW LUCKY HE IS TO HAVE ELIZA HOLY FUCK IM SO PISSED
  • The World Was Wide Enough: Reason for my death: Burr's "Wait!" when he shoots (and dear god I hope someone learns something from this like sometimes a fight isn't worth everything please I'm begging you learn to forgive)
  • Who Lives, Who Dies, Who Tells Your Story: Eliza I'm so proud of you and I hope you find happiness in the end because I FUCKING DIDN'T THIS SHIT HAS ME BAWLING MY EYES OUT
  • ...time to listen to it all over again

anonymous asked:

i'm wondering why suga and jimin never respond when nj calls them out like that *eye emoji* what u got to hide guys?

can you imagine,,, the kind of receipts namjoon would pull out if they ever tried to deny it in front of him

you know / i know / namjoon knows I’M LAUGHING SO HARD OMG I’m waiting for that day when namjoon accidentally says something about yoonmin that no one was supposed to know

LIKE THE FACT THAT HIS SHIP NAME FOR THEM IS SUJI