i'm late and i cheated with the lighting

Don’t know why I am a wrapped up in
Yesterday’s, last years
Why my heart won’t stay still at cliche hours
Why do I still feel the dust in my nose
Still dripping memories
I won’t let go of anything, I earned that good feeling
Fought so hard
Just to be at ease
For a night
I want to relive, relive, relive
Read over every text
Make sure my heart flutters the same
I’m still in love with 3 people
And I’d leave them all just for one last hit

Book the same hotel, please smell the same
Bring along the grey backpack with the rips along the seams
I wasn’t satisfied last time
But I get full off the memories
Savor them down, suck you up
You as in the concept
Of having normalcy
Things should be this way, I know
I shouldn’t be this way, I know
Just the way you are is a way enough
Keep lighting up my phone

—  I’ve Been Awful Lately, E.L.