Oh my god, in last night’s Bob’s Burgers, Bob takes Gene to a laser light rock show at the planetarium (super important to Bob, because it was his favorite when he was a teenager, and this is the last night before they’re closing the exhibit because it’s old and no one goes anymore, also it’s Bob’s birthday), and Gene has no idea what he’s in for, but he gets pumped for it anyway ‘cause Bob’s so excited about it, and finally they get in there and they’re watching it, and Gene has a sensory overload and kinda starts freaking out ‘cause he can’t handle it, so Bob takes him out and they sit in the car for a bit. Gene’s angry because Bob didn’t tell him it would be so loud and scary, so Bob offers to play the album for Gene at a normal volume, and Gene starts to enjoy it, so he reclines the seats, takes out the cigarette lighter, tells Gene to pretend it’s a laser, and starts drawing in the air, explaining the plot to him (it’s like a full on Pink Floyd or Rush-esque rock opera about a bunch of robot overlords telling rockers that they can’t play music anymore, and one Rebel rising against them). Gene gets really into it and decides he wants to see the finale of the laser show (which Bob regards as a life-changing experience), so they sneak back into the planetarium (there’s no re-entry allowed) with a few tricks that parallel the story from the album, and watch the climax of the show together (Bob fashions some earplugs for Gene out of a napkin). On the way home, Bob’s asking Gene how he liked it, and Gene says “I loved it!”, Bob asks him to speak louder ‘cause his ear’s are shot, and Gene yells, “I LOVED IT, DAD”. Bob yells back “I love you too, Gene”.
I FUCKING!!! CAN’T!!! DEAL!!!! WITH HOW GOOD THIS SHOW IS!!! I know i don’t talk about Bob’s Burgers a lot but this show is flawless and charming and gross and funny all at the same time, the characters are written like people with actual fears and anxieties, and unlike a lot of comparable shows, the comedy doesn’t come from the family being pitted against each other, it’s always the family against the world… I love it, I love it, it’s so pure and refreshing and still somehow manages to be funny without sacrificing it’s heart, and I fuckin’ love it, please watch Bob’s Burgers holy CRAP okay I’m done.
Strap in nerds because have i got a long post ahead for you
So me and @sassycsap (bless her soul. she’s like my first friend here) talked about the nyoom nyoom post with how Rich would totally cart Jake around in a wheel chair like madmen on a chariot race because Rich is a Fast Boy™ and somehow we accidentally gave birth to this beautiful thing called the *drum rooooolll*
BMC Incredibles AU
So here’s each of the Characters
Rich is Dash (super speed) u can’t argue with me. have u seen the nyoom nyoom post
Jake is violet (invisibility and force fields)
Michael is Frozone ya’ll (Ice powers)
Jeremy is Bob (Super strength)
Christine is Helen (Elastic Body) (because we’ve all universally accepted that she’s the Mom of the Gang)
Jenna is Jack-Jack (this guy has a lot of powers that I’m too lazy to type in)
Chloe is Edna (She makes the costumes!!!!)
Brooke is Mirage (That really pretty girl who’s a spy)(don’t worry, we we’re made her good)
Squip is Syndrome (Bad Guy™)
=(The HCs are under the Cut so I’ll spare u the mess)=
Good! A little bit. A tiny bit. Très bien et toi ?(very good and you?)
Very good, thank you. We start our interviews with “can you give us your five favourites words in English or French. Or a French sentence”. Someone told me you knew a French sentence.
Comment vous faites un café si délicieux? (How do you make such a delicious coffee?)
OK, that’s good.
That’s all I have.
Do you say it very often?
What does France mean to you? Is it something, someone etc...?
Best people I’ve known... I think her, *shows a fan* I guess. Fabien Barthez.
Yes, Fabien Barthez. Harry, you’re 23 years old and you’re one of the best known pop-star in the world. Everybody has expectations with your new album and single Sign Of The Times. Why did you choose that song? This is not what people were expecting.
I think I wanted to.. I've always liked music that made me feel something. You know I think writing it I could feet something I wanted to bring it out. I think it's a good indicator for me of what the album is to me. That's why I wanted to go with that first.
Billboard wrote that the single was "one of the more ambitious opening statements in pop this decade". Not bad, isn't it?
Do you have friends working at Billboard?
I don't know anyone at Billboard.
When we listen to the song we think of David Bowie, Queen, who else did you think of?
I mean, I think everyone, anything, any song you've ever listened to growing up or throughout your life or you've enjoyed, inspired you. There are a lot of different things. I wanted to just write and see what came out. I didn't know what I sounded like to make an album. So this process was as interesting for me as I think it will be for people listening to the album for the first time.
Do you know French singers other than Serge Gainsbourg? That's a tricky question.
I know Woodkid. He directed my music video.
I think his videos are amazing, he's a really talented guy and I love French people so I worked with him.
When you're in Spain, do you say that you love Spanish people?
It seems like everything has been easy...
You think so? It's French.
It's not a Spanish tie, isn't it?
Can I see your loafer? Oh yes! What is the brand? That's not French, isn't it? It's Italian.
That's from the European Union!
It seems like everything has been easy for you, is it true?
Was what simple?
Your life, everybody wants a life like yours, with One Direction...
I mean, I feel very lucky to be able to make music, I feel very lucky to be able to make this, I feel very lucky today being in France and performing my song. I love this song. I can't complain.
What were the unpleasant things?
I don't know, say only one thing.
I think when you care so much about something, it's hard to get to the point where you feel like it's finished and it feels like you're adding and it never ends and it adds up. So I think the hardest part was getting into that point and be like "ok that's finished."
You said to the Rolling Stone magazine that most of the album was inspired by a woman. Really?
No I think, honestly, the album is much more about me than it is about anyone else. I think if I said the album is about a woman it kind of feels like, I don't know, I put a lot of work into this. I don't feel like it revolves around woman. It's a lot about me and things I've never said before. It's more about me.
How did you start with a boy band and end with a solo career? Is it complicated?
It's been a lot of fun. You know we were very lucky to get to do some amazing things and at the moment in our lives, we're in a time where everyone is trying their own thing and have a good time. It's been amazing to see everyone doing their own thing as well. If I can do as well as the others, it'd be amazing.
Do you call them everyday or text them? Do you use What's app?
I don't have that.
Yes we talk, absolutely. And everyone is bringing stuff out. It's been a lot going on. It's been a good time.
This is the album cover! Can you describe it? Why did you choose this picture?
Yeah. So, I don't know. I worked with photographer Harley Weir, I'm a massive fan of her work. And that's amazing and I was lucky enough to work with her. I felt like this was what I wanted.
Why is it pink? Why the water? Why your back? Why? It's beautiful but why is it pink?
I don't know, man!
Really? You don't know?
I don't know. I don't think I want...
Apparently pink is Rock'n'roll's colour.
Apparently so. I don't know. I think it means something to me and if it means anything to anyone else, I wouldn't want to take away from that by explaining it. I think the cool thing about stuff like photos and art is you can just leave it. You don't have to explain it.
Everybody sees what they want to see.
Have you seen this?
*video of people reacting to Harry's single*
Your fans record themselves while listening to the song for the first time. You can hear relevant analysis and apparently they all really liked it. Do you read what people say about you on social media? On Youtube, Twitter, Instagram? Do you use Instagram?
Yes I use it a little bit.
*The public disagrees with Harry*
Yes I use it a little bit. I mean I wish everyone was having as good time as the girl who was like that with her hands. That's what I do when I listen to the song.
Are you the one using your Instagram? Do you use your own fingers or someone else does it for you?
Yes, I do mine.
Do you still vote in Redditch?
That's where I was born?
I don't live in Redditch.
So you don't vote there. Where did you vote?
What do you think of the Brexit? Welcome to Europe!
Thank you very much, thanks. I mean, I don't really comment on politics. To me, anything that brings people together is better than things that pull people apart. That's ... yeah.
Yet, you are in favour of equality of rights, men, women, gay people, straight people... That's politics.
I don't know. It doesn't feel like politics. I think stuff like equality feels much more fundamental. I feel like everyone is equal. That doesn't feel like politics to me.
Your fans are fetishists. They know all of your tattoos, piece of jewellery, they have heart attacks when you cut your hair. Right now you're playing with their feelings. Do you know that?
Yes! What is your favourite tattoo?
I think... I have a.. probably. I don't know, actually.
Which one is the latest?
The latest is this one there. *shows Arlo* And this one. *shows Jackson*
Jackson? All of them?
What's the story behind your haircut? How much did you spend on hair products with One Direction?
Yeah, like a lot. I used a lot, yeah.
You're in Dunkirk, Christopher Nolan's new movie.
How did you do?
Look at you there.
I am, that's me.
I auditioned and it was great. It's going to be a really cool movie.
Harry, it feels like we know you since you're a baby. The whole world discovered you in 2010 on X Factor.
*video of Harry's X Factor audition*
You auditioned alone but Simon Cowell had an idea... he put you in a band with Zayn, Louis, Liam and Niall. You became One Direction. You found the name One Direction and you sold millions of albums. One Direction are soon considered as the new Beattles and you filled the biggest stadiums. The whole world was talking about you. When you go out we prayed for your eardrums. You became UK's pride. David Cameron is in one of your music videos, your sang for the Queen. But in 2015... bang! Zayn left the band, fans couldn't get over it. But don't worry, their favourite is now on the cover of the Rolling Stone magazine, he's in Christopher Nolan's new movie, he's Mick Jagger on SNL... What you don't know is that we've met in 2012. You were in France to promote an album and now I have questions. First one! When you're in a car and fans are all around you, do you see that?
*video of fans around a car*
I think I've actually lost my shoe there. When I got in the car... I got in the car and I was like "how many shoes do I have?" Yes I lost my shoe.
I have another question! Do you still do that before going on stage?
*video of Harry and Lou*
Can we do it?
*does it anyway*
What is the weirdest question someone asked you?
I think it was actually a French interview. I got asked if I would pee in a sink... Yeah.
Ok, that's weird!
It was the first question, the first question.
It puts you in the mood.
What is the question you never want to be asked ever again? Did I asked you that question?
*Harry asks the public*
Which one? Oh crush.
Oh ok. I didn't ask it! Did you know that a French author wrote a novel about you. It's called "Styles", it's about his obsession with you. It's in French. You can translate it.
Oh! Is that true?
Yes it's true. He dedicated to you. It's called "Styles" and it's a really good book. Read it!
Thank you very much Harry Styles for coming tonight. His first eponymous album comes out on the 12th May. Thank you Harry Styles.
The Frat Boy-Type. Kinda always trying to bone someone before the end of the night. Pounded like, 20 beers. Probably wakes up with someone they thought was hotter/prettier when drunk.
Ditzy-Drunk Type. Girl who constantly compliments you and leans on your boyfriends shoulder and basically flirt w/ everyone and asks shit like "What's Aleppo?"
Toilet-Hugger. You don't *usually* get drunk, but tonight you did. At first you were socializing, and somehow, you ended up hunched over the toilet puking. You havent left. Your bestfriend almost puked in your hair. One time, she did.
Expresso Depresso. "No, I don't always drink when I'm sad." You kinda just came to the party to "escape". You don't want to be here, and in every movie EVER, you find some goth bitch to complain about existence with. That, or you're in a bar wanting to die cause your wife left you. Your choice, i guess.
Game Maker. You're the asshole who suggests 7 Minutes in Heaven, Truth or Dare, and other shitty games at middle school parties where someone found some Mike's Hard Lemonade. You still get drunk off of the shit, too. Somehow.
Socialite. You don't really get drunk. You just get buzzed, and go home. You talk to everyone and anyone, and get as many numbers as possible. You're quite the hook up when it comes to some drugs at a party, though.
Hoe. You're the girl who compliments everyone and smiles at everything. You also basically wanna suck someone's dick before the night ends. Who's? Idk.
Dirty Dancer. Someone complained about there "being too many clothed people" at the party. So, you took your clothes off, threw them at the person, and began dancing. Truly a Titty Hero.
Drunk "Driver". You're the guy who suggests they go on an adventure, or brought tons of booze to do some really illegal shit. As a kid, you literally drank just because "if we're doing something illegal, may as well do two!!"
Bartender. Nobody really appointed you bartender. Nobody really asked, either. But, nobody is complaining. You make the best booze, and the more YOU drink, the funnier, quicker, and cuter the drinks are made. By the end of the night, the drink counter looks a bit like a Scorpio's room -- clothes all over the floor in order to mop some mysterious liquid up.
Royal Rebel. Drink the keg. Bring the big ass case of booze. Make some kid puke. And then do it again. Dare devil galore, and kind of an asshole about it. That, or stays in the corner like they may make the party into a murder scene. One or the other.
Just like Taurus, but also drinks twice her weight and probably asks "Where's the weeeeeeEEEeeedd???" 20 times.
SNK Character Song Series 06: Levi (Image song & monologue translations)
Heeeyyy, Tumblr! Long time, no see :’) Did y'all enjoy SNK Season 2?
Levi and Erwin’s image song CDs were just released and I enjoyed listening to them a lot! ♡ So, I decided to pop back in for a bit and take on a new translation endeavor, something I haven’t really done in a while.
First up, this post is Levi’s image song and monologue! For the song, I included the original Japanese as well as romaji for karaoke purposes, if you’re so inclined ;) I also made a transcript of the monologue in the original Japanese, which you can read here (feel free to use it to translate into other languages.)
This should be obvious but keep in mind these are spoilers for the song & monologue, in case you wanted to experience them for yourself first. I definitely encourage supporting the official release & ordering the CDs if you haven’t already ♡
Konna sekai wo ima Sakasa ni shite futte mitemo Tashika na koto hitotsu Detekiyashinē¹ darō?
Kabe no soto wa jigoku Naka wa giman afureteru Sore mo awase nonde Ninmu wo hatasu dake
Kanjō nagasare shinigami kuwareru ka Tarinai atama wo mawashite miru ka
※Hikari ataranu tsuki no ura Tsukisusumu tame ni wa Motto hayaku toki ni wa Chūcho naki hijōsa wo Machigai ja nai yaritakya yare Koko ni kotae nante nai Tada kōkai nokosanu Mizukara no ketsudan wo
Koko de ikinuku nara Kotoba de suru kyōiku yori Itami no kioku toku Kyōkun ga hitsuyō darō?
Gisei mo kiken mo sakete wa Seika nado Erarenu mono da to Hara wo kukure yo
Kakusarete iru tsuki no ura Itsuka abaku tame ni Midasareru na wameku na Jōkyō wo mikiwamero Kekka ga nakya seikai mo nai Dakara saigo dake wa Tada kōkai nokosanu Mizukara no ikikata wo
Haigo de chitta yūkan na heishi tachi ga Nokoshita omoi chikara wo ataeru Kanarazu itsu no hi ni ka mezawari na Kabe mo kowashi Jiyū ni naru tame kono inochi sasagu
This kind of world now
Even if we try shaking it upside down There isn’t one thing that comes out
Which is certain, is there?
Outside the walls, it is hell
Inside, it is brimming with deceit
What’s more, we have to swallow it down
We can only fulfill our duty
Will we lose control of emotion and be consumed by a god of death? Or will we try to use our dim-witted heads?
The dark side of the moon, untouched by light
For the sake of pushing forward
We have to be faster and at times
Be heartless without hesitation It’s not a mistake if it’s what you want to do, so do it
There are no right answers here
Just being without regrets
Is my own decision
If were to I survive here
Rather than education with words
Isn’t persuasion by memories of pain
An essential lesson?
To avert sacrifice as well as danger
Things like results
Cannot be obtained
Steel yourself for it
The dark side of the moon is concealed
For the sake of someday being revealed
Do not get agitated, do not scream
Be certain of the circumstances
Without results, there are no right answers
Therefore only in the end
Just being without regrets
Is my way of living
Brave soldiers who died noble deaths² before us The hopes they left behind give us power
Without fail, one of these days
We will demolish the obstructive walls as well
For the sake of freedom, we devote this life
¹ It appears that Levi’s gruff style of speaking is present even in the lyrics of his song. The standard form of the verb here would be detekiyashinai (出てきやしない). ² The verb in the original Japanese, chiru/散る (or in this case, the past tense form chitta/散った) in the literal sense means “to fall” (in the context of leaves or blossoms from a tree). However, it also has the figurative meaning of “to die a noble death”. Even though we also say “fallen soldiers” in English, I worried that translating the lyric as, “fallen before us” or “fallen behind us” could both be misinterpreted, I decided to go with the more figurative meaning;;
Levi Monologue English Translation
Seriously now, I’ve had enough of this. This world is perpetual shit, and humanity is still toothless prey.
Those ugly titans are always going to take a bite out of us, and so we die a meaningless death.
Humanity is powerless.
When we won against the titans for the first time, the time when we sealed the wall in Trost district with a boulder, we could do it because of Eren’s power– a titan’s power.
The weak ones die quickly. How much power they use up doesn’t matter.
Eventually all of humanity, every single person will end up in the stinking maw of a titan, and while we experience the worst feeling there is, perhaps our miserable lives will end.
I realized it a few years ago. The stench of the gutters fills the inside of these walls. It’s been like this for over 100 years. It’s the way things are now.
Because I’ve had to breathe in this foul air ever since I was born, because I had no choice but to live crawling around in piles of trash, I thought that it was normal.
But when I went outside the walls for the first time, I realized how much I didn’t know about anything. It hit home for me, how much I had hated it.
The world outside the walls was like hell with titans wandering around, but the air I breathed there was completely different from the one inside the walls.
I realized, out there is what freedom is.
Freedom is something that absolutely cannot be obtained within the walls.
So I made a choice. I will continue to kill all of the titans.
If you want to confront the titans, information is never enough. So in order to survive, I learned how to live.
Quick action and callous decisions by assuming the worst is a necessary endeavor.
A moment’s hesitation, surrendering yourself to emotions, and you will be nothing but Titan bait.
If you don’t want to die, you have to always continue to keep this in mind.
And small choices will accumulate.
That is the way of living I have learned.
Risking no danger, making no sacrifices– there is no such easy discussion.
Even if there was, it’s all make-believe.
So far, I have lost numerous subordinates.
Whether my choice was correct at those times, I do not know. It’s always been like that.
Even if I believe in my own power, even if I believe in my comrades whom I fully trust, none of us will know the outcome.
Afterward, all that’s left is reality.
In that case, What can I do except make a desperate effort?
What can I do except doggedly press on?
If I have time to think about the bygone past, like if I were to have made a different choice back then, I will kill as many titans as possible within my power.
In that time, in that moment, a sudden, ridiculously strong power boils up from inside my body, and then I know what to do.
When that moment comes, I can no longer go back to my old self.
With these blood-stained hands, I accept my new self, I steel myself, and I only do what I must.
Was I correct? Or did I make a mistake? That’s the sort of thing no one knows, so it’s not worth worrying about.
All you can do is keep your mouth shut and make a choice without regrets.
Not understanding things about this world is true for everyone.
So I choose the guy whom I want to put my faith in.
Erwin is like that, too. No one knows what he is really thinking deep down.
But I trust his judgement.
He may be inviting the worst outcome, but he’s not afraid of that, he is able to choose something. That’s the kind of guy he is.
That’s why I chose to follow him. And I chose to fight.
In order to fight against this shit world, with this hand I’ll grab hold of the freedom of going beyond the walls for the first time.
they are two red-haired women, one pureblood and one muggleborn, but neither of them care because blood does not matter
(except that it does. except that this whole stupid war is about blood)
they are two red-haired women with the future of the wizarding world growing in their bellies
and this is how it goes
gideon and fabian prewett go into the ground that day
molly, the last remaining prewett, feels like she’s drowning
(and although she is now a weasley, she will always be a prewett)
arthur’s hand in hers reminds her that she is not alone (far from it, in fact), but it does not ease the pain, the grief of losing all that was left of her family in one fell swoop
there is a stream of endless platitudes and consolations, so repetitive and meaningless that they blend into one another
(and she feels awful for the ones she has offered in the past)
(sometimes words mean so little)
she tries to tune it all out. sometimes she mutters, ‘thank you,’ towards her feet, but mostly she is silent
‘when are you due?’
it is the only question that cuts through because it is so thoroughly unexpected, especially at a funeral
looking up, she meets a pair of brilliant green eyes, softened with sympathy in this moment
(but she knows just by looking at her that this woman can be hard, so hard and strong when she wants to be)
(and behind the woman stands a tall, bespectacled man with black hair, wilder and messier than hair really has a right to be, and she knows immediately that they are lily and james potter, who gideon and fabian talked about because of how bright and brave and in love they are)
when she does not answer, lily tries again, ‘you are pregnant, right? this isn’t some awful, social faux pas where i’ve asked a woman if she’s pregnant when she’s not, right?’
james sniggers and lily elbows him in the stomach
(and she wonders about these two, clearly so young, too young, for war and for a baby and for merlin knows what else might be coming)
(but she sees the way he holds her hand reverently, and the way she looks up at him reproachfully, her eyes betraying her amusement and embarrassment, and how he smiles and she smiles back and molly may as well not be there because they are so in love and damn the war)
‘march,’ she eventually answers and the anxiety in lily’s face melts away
then molly casts her eyes downwards and smiles
‘august,’ she answers, glowing like only a woman who is creating life can
lily’s hand skims across her stomach, the instinctual action of a woman whose belly is full of baby
(and molly would know, she has patted her own belly too many times to count)
‘well, i guess our children will be going to hogwarts together, then,’ molly muses aloud
‘maybe they’ll be best friends,’ lily smirks
and, for a moment, molly feels lighter because it is so reassuring to talk about the future in this way, to think about her children growing up in a world where they’re safe and happy and blood doesn’t matter and they can be whatever they choose to be
‘potter and weasley,’ james is staring dreamily at the sky before dropping his gaze back down and grinning widely
‘hogwarts won’t know what hit it.’
she never sees them again
her hands shake when she reads about them in the daily prophet
and she cries when she thinks about how they were bright and brave and so young
(too young and so in love)
(and now gone too soon)
she never forgets, but the memory does fade, the memory of meeting a vivacious couple on one of the worst days of her life and how they gave her hope for a future when the word future felt like taboo
and it doesn’t happen the way any of them had predicted, but it happens
because ron writes home in september 1991, talking about how he made friends with harry potter and how he stuffed himself silly on the hogwarts express because harry was generous and cool and being friends with him was easy and natural
so she thinks of lily and how she rubbed her belly, green eyes alight with hope
and she thinks of james and his cheeky grin and what he said that day
‘potter and weasley. hogwarts won’t know what hit it.’
I’m going to get straight to the point, you guys are self-destructive and are going to kill the fandom over your petty arguments and stupid self-entitlement. There hasn’t been a day since the beginning of the fandom that everything has just been peaceful for once (and I’ve been here since it’s birth) You all should be ashamed of yourselves, fighting online and hurting real people over fiction (this is not specifically towards ships btw) And I’m putting my foot down at all of this bullshit and trying to stop it
This is pretty lengthy so everything is under the cut
*internally* I'm just a normal high school girl. I suck at math. I hate my parents. When someone asks me about my opinion on complex socioeconomic issues, I just go "What the heck!?" and start "texting" or something like that. My life would be just like yours, except for one thing: I have an amazing power... I can talk to cetaceans!
*at the docks, a bell tolls as our normal protagonist hears the voices of cetaceans bubbling in her mind*
*staring deeply into the ocean*
Ahoy! What're you doing?
Just staring into the oceanic abyss, thinking about how much I hate my parents. *internally* I have to keep my ability to speak to cetaceans secret or else... uh...
Haha, I feel that, friend. What a colorful life we teens live, our seaside environment awakening a rumbling darkness within ourselves of which we mull on our own with nothing but the unbounding depths of the ocean as our one escape. An escape which serves to only maim our fragile egos with newfound adolescent anxieties.
What are you even talking about?
I don't know. I haven't slept in a week. Let's go to the mall.
*at the mall*
*internally* My town might as well be called Lamesville. Nothing ever happens here, but the mall can be pretty fun. It's only place in the whole town with anything in it that isn't fish or excessive amounts of woodlice.
...So I'd just dance and I'd dance until my feet broke. When that happened, I'd just get up and dance on my broken feet. And I did this until they were raw and blood was everywhere. I kept waking up in the morning extremely exhausted after this dream. I decided to record myself one night and it turns out I was dancing in my sleep. I haven't slept since I saw that. *leans in close to the normal girl* I'm afraid of what I'll do in my sleep.
Wow, sounds weird... I guess. *sips coffee*
OMIGAWD! It's Chad Alphakid. He's coming this way!
*the normal girl and her best friend squee*
*externally* That's Chad Alphakid. Who is he? He's only the hottest most coolest boy in this entire lame city. I've been crushing on him since I was like twelve.
Did I just say that out loud!?
*sits at the table* Listen, I don't care what you or your friend think of me. I need help!
Have you murdered somebody?
Do you need a girlfriend?
No, it's the ocean. The sound of her waves crashing against the shore is like a faultless siren song. There isn't a single night where I don't have visions of floating within her cold embrace. The allure of her boundless depths beckon to me like a lover. I'm afraid that if I don't get help soon, I'll find myself taken away by her to a fate unknown.
*internally* Great, this is a chance to finally use my power to speak to cetaceans to my benefit! *externally* But why do you need us to help you?
You guys are the biggest fucking degenerate weirdos in this washed up town. If anyone knows how to deal with this, it's you two.
I'm not a weirdo! I'm a completely normal girl.
Dude, you fucking talk to fish.
You do talk to fish.
I don't talk to fish! *internally* I talk to cetaceans, they're mammals, not fish. Also, that's supposed to be a secret, dammit!
*at the shore*
Ah, Mother Ocean! Take me!! Take me!!! *attempts to run into the ocean, but gets held back by the normal girl and her best friend*
Simmer down, aqualad!
Why did you fools take me here, if not to release into the embrace of sweet Mother Ocean!?
We talked it over and we decided that the best way to get you over your obsession is make you hate the ocean.
Does it involve you talking to fish?
Yes, I mean no. I mean, fuck! Cetaceans aren't fish.
*the normal girl sits at the edge of shore, her eyes rolls up in her head as she proceeds to make fucked up porpoise sounds*
*falls over limp*
Does this mean that I'm free to wade into Mother Ocean and meet my fate among her ever chaotic waes?
*lets chad go* Yeah, dude. I'm too far gone to care about things anymore.
*strips off all of his clothes* Good. I now understand that there was no avoiding this. This was always a forgone conclusion. My fate is with the waves. Sayonara, weird best friend guy.
*runs into the ocean*
*kicks the normal girl's body* Guess she really is dead.
*walks home as the night encroaches* My closest friend is dead, and Chad is probably dead too. I wonder where my fate lies?
*yawns* Maybe I should go to sleep and just dance myself to death finally. No, I don't think I could go to sleep even if I wanted to anymore. I'm probably going to die from exhaustion in the next few days, not having felt rest or comfort again. Or maybe I'll just stay awake forever. I feel like I was supposed to have an epiphany here, or some type of awakening. But, there's nothing. I feel like everything I've ever done has been pointless. God, I'm just really tired.
*back at the shore*
*a gray fleshy version of the normal girl crawls halfway out of the porpoises mouth*
There goes my corpse! *drags her weird porpoise body towards the corpse* Why did I die with such a dumb expression on my face? Lame! I hope Chad didn't see.
*looks around with beady eyes* No one's here. I can finally do this.
*kisses her dead body on the lips* Blargh!
*spits out blood* I bit my tongue when I died. Gross. I guess I can cross making out with my dead body and becoming a mermaid off of my bucket list, though.
So this cave-dude I know recently called Prompto a ‘pussy’. Delightful, right? But then I’ve also noticed lately this weird tendency in fics to reduce Prompto to (and reinforce his character as) this emotionally weak, almost ‘frightened bunny’ trope, even bordering on actual childishness at times. Now, these are in fact two different issues in the end, yet the overlap is considerable, when you think about it. And I just…
While I recognise and absolutely support all fic writers and such in their right to do whatever the hell they want (Please do! You are valued, and our fandom needs you!), I just…maaaaan. Sometimes I just have to gently shake my head when it comes to some characterisations of our boy Prom.
Now I totally get that AU’s are a thing, as well as personal perspectives. Like, in my head, Prompto can have a pretty bad potty mouth, and regularly drops those f-bombs, and you can totally disagree with me, which is a beautiful thing. Also, if you follow this blog you have definitely seen me tag Prompto as a ‘smol cinnamon bun’, in need of protection ‘at all costs’ and blah blah blah (this is largely meme-based, because I subsist on Diet Coke and memes- I digress).
But it’s honestly the layered essence of what makes this character who he is, the many elements written into and played out in the canon, that make him so appealing to me, personally. To see him essentially reduced to a caricature of himself, a distilled version of everything he is that just sort of latches onto this ‘he’s the baby and the smallest, the most caring and therefore the weakest’ idea, just feels so off the mark. And it makes me kind of sad, you know?
Let it be known right off the bat that I’m obviously by no means claiming to be some sort of FINAL WORD ON PROMPTO or anything so ridiculous. Neither is this some sort of ‘call out’ on any particular writing or portrayal, at all. I can’t abide by that shit.
I just feel like talking about how I see Prompto, I guess?
In all honesty, the Prompto I experienced in the game, as well as in the anime, and audio drama, was anything but weak, and anything but childish. He was always, right from the start, very much the backbone of the Chocobros’ group, the one voicing what everyone was thinking, easing their tension and swallowing his self-doubt to strive to be the best he could be for his friends, like he’s always done.
He got this.
Prompto literally escaped/was rescued from/was vaguely aware of at least, a mysterious and probably terrifying early history, and then proceeded to face a lot of bullshit when he was growing up- at home, with frequently absent parents who left him often to his own devices, as well as at school, where he was closed off from and largely ignored by the other kids. This all could have resulted in a really timid, emotionally fragile or ‘weak’ character, but the fact is… it didn’t? He grew up independent and actually pretty capable of caring for himself, not to mention totally self-taught when it came to interacting with others (thank you for the vote of confidence, Luna). He also grew up with a compassionate streak a mile wide.
I won’t get too into my thoughts on this idea in particular because this post is already massive, and to discuss patriarchal conventions (the aforementioned use of the word ‘pussy’ in this context), not to mention strength vs. resilience on top of it would just get out of hand. I will say this: we can all stand to remember that compassion does not equal weakness.
Prompto was afraid a lot, sure- they all were, obviously- but he was also brave as fuck. If bravery means to ‘feel the fear and do it anyway’, then Prompto’s a master. He’s been practising his entire life, after all.
Prompto was always there, right? This ever present force for good, supporting his friends and their goals, to the bitter end. He was there, thinking and acting on the fly during the Leviathan ritual, which was obviously a horrific ordeal even before its conclusion. He was ever at the ready to see things from all sides, like when Ignis was injured and all hell broke loose between the less-capable, (emotionally-speaking) Gladio and Noct. He was even there, ready to offer a taste of his usual, cheery self when they were all together for the very last time, even if it was clearly breaking his heart.
And yeah he’d kid around, make silly jokes (interestingly, it seems, especially during situations of high tension or uncertainty on the part of his friends, like deep in the depths of some mind-boggling ruins or when facing the prospect of ‘hey, we are actually going to go to Altissia now- oh holy fuck!’). But he was also so very capable of adult conversation, especially when it came to his feelings, which we saw several times throughout the canon- a sure sign of real maturity if ever there was one, in my opinion.
The fact is, Prompto’s fear isn’t who he is, and neither is his small physical stature nor his big heart. Rather, his actions and choices in the face of all of that make up the person he is. (Like anyone, right?). He is no caricature for cute, nor for weak or timid or scared. And I for one want to see more about that guy, in all his multifaceted, achingly resilient, freckle-faced glory.
I really should be doing my homework and projects but I really wanted to post this so here you go. This is Iwaoi’s Q&A after Oikawa proposed, shhhhh. This is how I imagined their Q&A went, they take turns to read the questions so why not.
[If you want this to be fluffy, imagine them sitting together on their shared bed with Iwaizumi on Oikawa’s lap.]
Question: How long have you two been going out?
Oikawa: 5-6 years? We started dating during our university years, though we have known each other since we were kids.
Iwaizumi: What he said.
Question: Who confessed?
Question: Who cooks or does most of the chores?
Iwaizumi: Me. This man can’t cook for shit, he must also never be allowed into the kitchen because he seemingly broke the sink, set our kitchen partially on fire and destroyed 26 of our mugs.
Oikawa:Iwa-chan! That’s an over-exaggeration!
Iwaizumi: No it’s not, stop denying it in order to protect your huge ego.
Question: Do you two want kids? If yes, how many and what would their gender be?
Iwaizumi: Two would be nice.
Oikawa: Yeah. We’re fine with any gender.
Iwaizumi: Just as long as they don’t grow up with his shit fashion choices.
Oikawa: Iwa-chan I’m your future husband why.
Question: Have you two ever fought?
Oikawa:Eh, yeah of course. But if you mean a serious argument, then maybe only once or twice.
Iwaizumi: During our University years.
Oikawa: Yeah, long distance relationships were really hard, we studied on opposite ends of the world almost. It strained our relationship because we couldn’t neglect our studies, we barely contacted each other, and that worsened things.
Iwaizumi: I was stressed out about all the assignments I had to work and didn’t want to lead him on, I guess I thought staying together was selfish on my part.
Oikawa: It got better though. I flew over and we managed to work things out. Though before that we didn’t text or Skype for two weeks.
Iwaizumi: Stuff happens. He makes it better.
Oikawa: Yeah, and I’m probably the luckiest guy to still be able to call him mine.
[*Oikawa kisses Iwaizumi on the cheek.*]
Question: What do you aspire to achieve here on Youtube?
Oikawa: More milk-bread.
Iwaizumi: A channel where people feel safe.
Question: Any embarrassing facts about the other?
Iwaizumi: He wears alien boxers, sleeptalks, sings in the shower; using the shower head as a microphone, and steals my fucking cereal.
Oikawa: Well you have a crush on Godzilla!
Iwaizumi: Everyone knows that!
Question: What do you love about the other person the most?
Oikawa: That’s like asking me which baby you want me to kill. I love everything about my Iwa-chan, choosing one is absolute torture… Although, you may not know this but Iwa-chan has a nice ass.
Iwaizumi: And he’s a dick to make up for his lack of one.
Oikawa: *Offended look* That was uncalled for Iwa-chan!
Iwaizumi: Your face is uncalled for.
Oikawa: And you know very well I don’t have a small dic-
[*He bleeped this part*]
Question: Any favourite bands or Singers?
Iwaizumi: Get Scared, Starset, The Neighbourhood, Nine Lashes, Red and maybe Simon Curtis.
Oikawa: That’s a lot Iwa-chan. I only have one.
Oikawa: You. *Winks*
Question: Guilty pleasures?
Iwaizumi: Videogames or binge-watching The BigBang theory on Netlfix.
Iwaizumi: Of who?
Oikawa: *Hesitates* … dogs.
Iwaizumi: Liar. You read fanfiction of us don’t you?
Oikawa: The world will never know.
Question: Do you play/like Pokémon? If yes, who is your favourite legendary and Eeveelution?
Iwaizumi: Yeah, we play them. For me, it’s Umbreon and Giratina.
Oikawa: Mine is Sylveon. I don’t really have a thing for legendaries.
Iwaizumi: I just thought of something.
Iwaizumi: You remind me of Empoleon.
Oikawa: What why.
Iwaizumi: Proud and Narcissistic.
Iwaizumi: It’s Pokédex entry is literally “If anyone were to hurt its pride, it would slash them with wings that can cleave through an ice floe.” It’s you as a blue penguin.
Oikawa: I’m not a penguin.
Question: Would you suck dick for a million bucks?
Iwaizumi: I suck it all the time so why not.
Oikawa: Iwa-chan I thought you said not to talk about our personal-
Iwaizumi: I do what I want.
Oikawa: *Is now aggressively turned on*
Iwaizumi:*He notices cause he is on his lap.*
Oikawa: … Uhm, I have a gag reflex.
[Very obvious jump-cut because Iwa’s hair is rather messy and it clearly wasn’t just now. Also, *chokes* is that a glass of water that wasn’t there? Wow, what could it possibly be for?]
imo, jungkook seems like the type of person who will not be forced to do things. i think there have been a number of instances whereby he has said “no” to being told to do something bc he doesn’t want to do it.
just take the recent bv behind the scenes as an e.g., jinmin wanted jjj (jin-jimin-jungkook) to play the “throw their shoe as far as possible” game to see who would go into the sea. but jungkook was adamant on not playing it. in fact, i’m not even sure how many times he said “no” to his hyungs regarding it. he just does. not. want.
there was also this bangtan bomb in which jungkook was saying how he knows that fans don’t really like his fashion sense aka baggy pants?
do you guys see? “but i like baggy pants”
i’m not saying he doesn’t care for the fans’ opinions. but it’s more like… he seems like someone who wouldn’t go so far as to please someone. he likes what he likes, he dislikes what he dislikes.
in fact, he has said it himself that he isn’t one to bother about what other people say. and i find to be really important actually.
which brings me to mY NEXT POINT.
this honestly makes all the jikook moments (not saying that other ship moments are not genuine, i’m only talking about jikook bc i am well… a jikook shipper sO) more believable to me. it doesn’t necessarily mean that there aren’t any fanservice involved when it comes to their moments. but i can say that at least 97% of their moments are genuine.
let me just bring up the fact that jungkook does not like sharing his clothes. bUT WELL HEY, who do we always see him sharing clothes with? [eye emoji]
or how jungkook is always complaining about how slow jimin is and it drives him crazy, but yET [drum rolls] he is always the one who waits for him and ends up walking together with him.
- during bv1, when everyone was waiting for jimin outside the hotel so jk turned around to look for him back in the hotel
- during bv2, when jm and jk were the last 2 to leave the plane together
- you know what? jUST THE MANY (and i mean m a n y) INSTANCES WHERE WE SEE JK AND JM BEING THE LAST TWO TO WALK TOGETHER (I’m too lazy to screenshot I’m sorry)
- in fact, jimin himself has ever asked the qn during one of the bangtan bombs:
yea jimin…. i wonder why.
(let’s not forget that this goes both ways. the iconic: pjm waited for hours for jjk to finish his shoot)
lastly, how transparent jungkook actually is with his feelings (at least to me, he is a pretty transparent person)
yea okay.. whats that smile for kook?
^ iconic!!! but never forget how HAPPY he was when jimin entered his room a second time bc he thought jimin wasn’t gonna come back again and was actually disappointed
^another important moment!!! did he really have to back hug jimin and close his eyes in a crowded place full of idols and mind you, they were actually taking a group photo. he should be posing or something but no, that isn’t his priority. his priority was embracing jimin and just… enjoying the moment. even if for just a short while.
also lbr, even if a moment was “fanservice”, does it make the moment any less…important? bc back to my first point - jk wouldn’t do something he doesn’t want/like to do
so if a moment is fanservice, i doubt jk would Do It if he actually doesn’t want to do it.
like the 21cg choreo. it was found out thru a fansign that both jk & jm choreographed the jikook parts together. see, this is a fanservice moment BUT it is also something that they both mutually discussed it together, that they want to do together.
also back up a little, this does not mean jungkook does not respect other people’s opinion/feelings. he does. i think we have seen many instances, not just with jimin but the other hyungs too, whereby he knows his boundaries and when to stop.
one familiar e.g., when jimin lost his phone during bv1 and they wanted to do a hidden camera but jk was the first to end it and give the phone back to jimin.
honestly…i don’t know what this whole post is for. it’s just word vomit and i guess i just wanted to say how much i love jikook? and how i appreciate every little moment between them. whether it may be big or small.
tl;dr jungkook does What He Wants
(btw, these are all just my opinions and thoughts. not everyone will fully agree with me ^^)
((I don’t know if this has been done, so if it has please tell me.))
So I’ve seen a lot of those ‘Humans are Space Orcs’ posts and I think those are really cool, but unnoticed they all consist of one thing: humans traveling with the aliens.
So there are a lot of ways you can do that, right? You could go all Star Trek and make it to where the humans and aliens all live together in harmony and travel space together and things like that. But I have a different idea and I think it’s pretty cool.
So humans don’t really know aliens exist. Obviously you have your conspiracy theorists and loons and the occasional 'abducted’ person, but for the most part it’s just generally accepted that aliens are fun and all, but they’re not /real/.
And then there’s this kid. He/she/they don’t really have a happy life, but they can’t really do anything about it. You can make them whatever you want, have any or of disorder or disability or just make them an angsty teen that comes from an unhappy home. They want to leave, but they’re too young, so they have to stay.
Then of course, the aliens come. But instead of crap like Independence Day (I say crap in a loving way, the movie was pretty good and I like it), the aliens just take one look at the kid, pick them up, and leave. That’s it. Nothing else. Just take the kid and go.
Of course the kid is terrified at first, but after like the first day or so they calm down because the aliens are treating them like gosh-darn royalty. They put the kid up in the nicest room on the ship, give them the best food they can muster from their rations, and provide for any kind of entertainment the kid might want. It’s like paradise, and the kid is happier than they’ve been in a while.
So the kid travels with these aliens on all sorts of cool adventures and throughout this period is when we get the 'Humans are Space Orcs’ discoveries. Like the kid will go up to random giant furry beasts and just glomp them and coo at them while the aliens are like “No that’s deadly it will kill you oh my god what is this kid doing?!?!” Or, if the kid has a uterus, come time for their period the aliens freak out because “Oh holy shmarda, the child is bleeding!! Why is the child bleeding?!” Hilarious antics and shenanigans ensue and the child is so happy with their new life that they never want to go back home.
Also included: drama when the aliens return to earth to find a human companion for the child (even though they didn’t ask for one you guys don’t have to do this really it’s fine) and the parents of the kid demand they be returned immediately. The kid doesn’t want to go back of course so the aliens have to fight for custody over the kid in court (I guess idk but something along those lines. Maybe the humans try to kill the aliens because the kid was “abducted” and that causes a lot of angst and problems.).
Idk just something that’s been floating about in my imagination for a while. I think it would be a really cool show though tbh like someone hire me.
AM I LATE I HOPE I'M NOT LATE! How about some headcanon's of a Saeran and MC brotp?
~YOU WEREN’T AND THANK GOD CAUSE I AM LIVING FOR THIS RN. I am basing this on MCxSaeyoung and Saeran is the platonic ‘new brother’ to MC.
Sorry I might be going a bit overboard but like…this is one of my favorite platonic relationships haha!
You two are an unstoppable force against his antics
Your “thing” together is going on hikes
Both LIVE for just quiet time walking long trails in the outdoors and seeing new sites together
Saeyoung isn’t…much of a hiker…
Saeran had been cooped up for so long that all he wanted to do was get out and explore
And you wanted an opportunity to get to know him better
So Saeyoung started to urge you to go with him and before you knew it…you were hooked as well!
Saeyoung gets a little sad sometimes feeling left out but mostly he just loves you guys spending time together
At first it was a lot of quiet walking and individual musings
The first ice breaker happened when you accidentally tripped on a rock while daydreaming
“Hey, you okay?” Saeran held a hand out for you to stand back up
“Hah, yeah,” you dusted the rocks that were lightly embedded in your knee. “Guess I should pay more attention. It’s just so beautiful out here-” you began but Saeran unexpectedly cut you off
“It really is. How often do people get to see sites like this? Brother is sitting at home and meanwhile I get to see…” his voice trailed off and he spread out his arms on the cliff, as if he was showing off the view to a group of people
“Hah, you aren’t wrong,” you took a place next to him. “It truly is stunning. Maybe one day we can drag him out here.”
Saeran seemed lost in thought for a moment before finally turning to you with a smile
“Yeah, that would be nice,” he nodded slightly
It was small moments after that
You talking about yourself
And Saeran opening up more…day by day, trip by trip
It was always a special moment when you saw animals in the wild
Something about seeing a creature alive in nature like that lit something inside of you both
“Look,” Saeran whispered and pulled your pack back on the trail, “a fox.”
The two of you watched for a while, following her slowly off the trail a ways until she reached her two kits, their small heads poking from their den in the soft evening light
“They make such a loud sound for being so small,” you whispered, hoping they wouldn’t notice you.
“They’re hungry, calling for their mom…” he paused for a bit, watching. “She must be on the evening hunt for them.”
Night time was always when you connected the most, after you set up camp and got a fire going
Maybe it was the fatigue of the day, who knows, but you both always ended up talking until you felt you might pass out any minute
Soon the effects of your trips together spilled over into real life
You can’t say when this had happened
And neither could he…
But somehow, somewhere along the way, you had both become best friends
Saeran tried to deny and ignore it at first
He would pretend nothing exciting or important happened on your trips
However, slowly but surely the bond you two had been building began to seep through like honey through a cheesecloth
“Why did she leave so early this morning?” Saeran’s tone was almost interrogative, causing Saeyoung to smirk
“Jaehee needed help with the cafe,” Saeyoung said it like nothing
“And did you make sure she got there alright?” Saeran pressed, his voice laced with panic
“Of course, look,” he turned the monitor to show Saeran you were there, wiping the counter and very much in-tact.
Saeyoung couldn’t help the joyous feeling that was erupting inside, seeing his brothers sigh of relief, knowing the two people he loved the most, cared for each other
Though, this came with a couple downsides for him
Like when he was helping make breakfast with you and he asked how many pieces of toast Saeran wanted
“I [HE DOESNT] DON’T LIKE TOAST” both you and Saeran said in unison
“But….well…when we were…” Saeyoung couldn’t believe he didnt know this simple fact about his own brother now
Or when it was sandwich making time in preparation for a picnic and you were showering
And Saeran grabbed Saeyoung’s hand as Saeyoung made the sandwiches
“She hates mustard.” Saeran said dryly
It was as simple as that
But it turned in to such a deep bond that they felt closer than you and Saeyoung at times
Well…According to Saeyoung
He didn’t get upset or angry
It just made him want to know more about you both
Even when Saeran confronted him on more personal matter in private
“You’ve been pretty distant lately,” he spoke bluntly
“I’ve been busy with work, is all…” Saeyoung knew it was true and yet it hurt to even deny it.
“Yeah, well, get too busy and you will see the greatest person to ever walk into your life, leave…” Saeran’s brow knit together. “I’m staying over at Yoosungs the next three days. If you don’t…fix this…I’ll beat the shit out of you.”
Yes. The bond between you and Saeran was strong
You, Saeyoung and Saeran were a real family now
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I'm saying this from the perspective of a shipper I guess but looking at all these Sheith moments got me thinking.. Would it be possible that the creators themselves are actually planning for them to be canon at some point? But because of some complications..(not gonna name it) they decided to scrap it off? Do you think this is possible? Although Keith telling Shiro he is like a brother to him kinda made me sad? lol I have got so many questions so I can't wait to see more of this amazing series!
Hi anon! The thing is, writing and animation for shows like this are done way in advance. When season 1 came out, I imagine the plot up until seasons 3 or 4 was already set in stone. And Voltron, like most shows, works off a “TV Bible” that had all the major plot points outlined right when the series was first pitched so,, once you plan things out like that I think it’s difficult to make big changes to characters’ relationships.
I think the writers have also made it clear that they are going to go ahead with their narrative rather than catering to popular fannon, particularly when they’ve told certain fans they don’t agree with their mentality at all. Even with things like how they mentioned Allura was a teenager like all the other paladins, a lot of people didn’t headcannon that, but the writers stood by it. It’s their own story after all, and I don’t see why they should change it. As for sheith, we know the writers have outright told people that harassing shippers isn’t okay and they’re completely against it.
There are also plenty of writers, animators, and VAs who have liked clearly romantic sheith fanart, cosplay, or pro-sheith posts (and gotten backlash for it). So we know they’re certainly not opposed to shipping it. And I mean, whether it’s romantic or not, we know that the cast certainly seems invested in their dynamic. The fact that their relationship and character development is by far the most fleshed out is certainly apparent. Here’s also some stuff staff has drawn that shows they at least like Shiro and Keith’s bond:
So anyway, despite how the fandom can be, I don’t think it would necessarily deter the writers or dissuade them from following through with major writing decisions. And given how supportive the staff has been of sheith, I don’t think they would suddenly just abandon whatever plans they had for their character development together. Under the hypothetical that they did make sheith canon, I think they would just maybe adjust how they went about it so that the fandom could kind of like, ease into it, and hopefully not be too mad about it. Though I have no doubt people would still harass the staff if sheith happened, which just…makes me feel really bad to be honest…
On the BOM line though anon, I don’t think it goes against sheith at all and here’s why:
Why doesnt SOMEONE do something aobut ALL THESE FUCKING BOTS ON social MEDIA ???????????????
*internally* The new guy is so cool. Well, I guess he's not the new guy anymore because he has been working here for months now, but he's still great. I look up to him so much. He's funny, and outgoing. He even gave me a cute nickname. He never recognizes my affection for him, but I think today is the day. Today is the day he'll realize how cool and cute I am.
Do you like music?
Yeah, I mean everyone likes music. Kinda weird if you don't. You're friends with that rep, right?
You know, the mopey one. Dark hair. Does she like me?
Everyone likes you. I like you.
Yeah, but that rep. That rep doesn't talk to me.
I'm sure she likes you. You're so cool and kind and... uh, Britney Spears followed me on twitter!
Whoa, what!? Britney Spears!? You're fucking joking!
I'm serious. I guess, I'm really cool now. Hahahahahahahaha.
Lemme see your phone. I wanna see Britney following you. Can you like DM her?
You're not allowed to take your phone out at work.
Come on, no one cares.
Uh, here you go, I guess. *hands new guy her phone*
*checks twitter* ...This is a bot.
It's not the real Britney Spears, this is very obviously a bot.
No, it's totally her. How can you even tell?
First off, she only has two followers. One of which is you and the other is another Britney Spears bot. Secondly, her twitter name is Brittany Spear. Third, all of her posts are about discount fishing rods.
Oh... I guess I didn't notice.
You're fucking with me aren't you?
*sweats* Sure, yeah.
*laughs* I love you, braids. You're funny as shit.
You love me!?
Yeah, as a minor work acquaintance. Hey, if you talk to that rep later on, tell her to hit me up some time.
*checking phone* It can't be a bot. It's definitely not a bot. Why would a Britney Spears bot follow me. I'm not even interested in fishing. It has to be the real Britney. *DMs the bot* Hey, hello Britney.
hi what're up :)
Britney, I knew you were real!
lol hey ! :) :P
Britney, you have to prove to this guy at my job that you're real. He's so cute and I love him so much and I want him to notice me.
wow hey did you kno that u can decrease you're morrtgrage rate by up to 20% check it out at www.extra.savings.ca/riwuWqoaQ/ref/100200
Britney, this is serious.
do U want boys to like U 🤔
Yes, Britney! Show me the way!
is verry easy just follow this link and find your way https://find.your.way.jp/4wfwf42435753g$single/trinity/
*stumbles into new guy's cubicle* Greeting.
Does your like fishing?
Nah. Never been much of an outdoorsman unless it involves extreme sports.
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You alright, braids? You sound kinda complete weird, and your eyes are a little completely black.
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Uh... yeah. *leads co-worker out of his cubicle* I'm kinda completely busy at the moment. So I'll talk to you later braids. You should probably get back to work too.
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*tweets* Why is it so dark? Why am I so numb?
word count: 9,018 (i was gonna split this up, but decided to just keep it together. it’s long. put on your favorite sweatpants and grab that bag of hot cheetos you’ve been saving before you dig into this thing.)
author’s note: GUESS WHO’S BACK, BACK AGAIN? BERRY’S BACK, TELL A FRIEND. welcome to the first installment of my college!shawn series, which takes place during Y/N’s (that’s you) freshman year. it’s got fluff, angst, and some pretty stupid decisions on everyone’s part. title from “shot down” by khalid, as per a recommendation from @light-up-shawn. enjoy.
Upon your arrival to college, you had been on the receiving end of entirely too much advice from various relatives, older friends, and even strangers. Don’t walk alone at night, don’t sign up for eight AM classes, don’t drink the “jungle juice” at any frat parties.
Your parents had told you to focus on your studies and seek tutoring help if you needed it. Your sister had encouraged you to join a sorority to really be at “the heart” of university life, as if you knew what that meant. The only advice your cousin gave you was to always remember your room key and to pack a pair of shower shoes, the latter of which she accompanied with a shudder - you could piece together that anecdote on your own.
But nobody had prepared you for this particular problem.
Hello! I have an idea for the ficlet (feel better btw!). Okay: HS AU with popular!Dean and popular!Cas, they're those two annoying guys who make funny (but also obnoxious) comments in every single class, and make stupid, flirtatious remarks to each other like "Cas looks pretty hot today guys" or "I'm totally dating Dean, everyone" etc. Only thing is, they're secretly in love, but neither will admit it. I've had this idea for a while and I'd LOVE for a talented author to execute it.
Aaaahhh it’s been too long since I’ve done a High School AU and I’ve missed it. Thanks for this one and thanks so much for asking me to fufill the prompt! I hope I do it justice :)
“Please take your seats quickly. I want to discuss your quiz scores so we can go over any questions you may have before the final test.” Ms. Mills said with a stack of papers clutched against her chest.
Dean stretched his arms above his head as he flopped into his usual seat on the third row, next to the wall so he could lean up against it in times of extreme laziness. He sprawled out accordingly, dropping his backpack to the floor and draping his letterman jacket over his seat until the air conditioning kicked in during the middle of class like it usually did.
“Hey, hot stuff.” Dean said with a nod as Castiel sat down in the seat next to him.
“Good morning, Dean.” Castiel said, barely looking up as he aligned his binder and world history book neatly on the small desk in front of him.
“How was that student council thingy yesterday?” Dean asked, popping a piece of gum into his mouth.
“Absolutely dreary without your shining personality to brighten all of our days,” Castiel murmured, completely straight-faced.
Dean winked as Ms. Mills began talking again.
“Some of you need to look at your notes from the beginning of the year again,” she said as she began passing back the quizzes. “And some of you need to remember that - if you want full credit on the final test - the answer to ‘What are the seven wonders of the ancient world’ is not ‘Castiel Novak’s Ass’ written seven times.”
She frowned when she got to Dean’s desk, dropping the paper on his desk as the rest of the class laughed.
Dean clicked his tongue and made a finger gun at Castiel with another wink.
“Really, Dean? Don’t be childish.” Castiel said, just loud enough for everyone to hear. “We all know that’s not true. I haven’t done any squats in at least a month.”