i'm having summer feelings

This is so so important and beautiful. And important. And beautiful.

why is summer so.. empty? 80% of my summer so far has just been feeling bad about not going out enough and just feeling gross and sad,, see this is why christmas is better


I know you don’t like what you see
But I’m not going back to how I used to be

to the person i was before–

your poetry is an unbecoming,
forever finding ways to negate
phrases that should bloom
easily. all your favorite words
sound like unravel, like ache,
like the moon as a white hole
in the dark, heavenly skull,
starshine bone.

you wrote about uprooting
your heart and throwing it
out with the weeds. today,
we are the dandelion, roots
seeking purchase anywhere
that the sun touches. i want
you to see me, growing in
the grave dirt you swallowed
for so long. you wrote
a poem once that goes
something like this–

at night, your bones pool
into miles of blue, a flood
that lifts you to the ceiling.
you float there, pinned, and
the birds flit from their nests
to circle you, feathers wavering
like leaves in the wind of
a passing train.
why don’t you just fly, they
say. the sky is right there,
why aren’t you flying?

i have not grown wings
yet, but i think i know more
now about how hollow bones
make you buoyant, but how
emptying yourself will never
be enough to let you fly. just
because something calls you
does not mean you have to

i promise that we heal. if
not today, then someday.
we will flower, yellow and
flushed with heat, growing
where they told us not to,
seeding the wind silver with
our wishes.

to the person i was before:
you are forgiven. i hope
you can say the same
of me. you have all
my love now, even if
you do not believe me.


On visiting Greece as a Hellenic polytheist

There is something profoundly altering about standing on the soil of those who first honoured the Gods I honour, seeing the places where they worshipped and the land that is still there. Here I am, soon to be two millennia after the fall of this palace, this temple, this sanctuary, here I am with my bound hair and my heart full of devotion towards these same deities the people who died here believed in. Around me are ruins, and yet I am - we are - still here.

There is a strange continuity, even beyond time. This land is interwoven with sacredness. This is the sea Poseidon first claimed as his own, the forests Artemis first roamed. These columns, that oak at Dodona, they were places of utmost reverence, and you can still feel it. The pilgrims who came here came with bowed head and hands full of flowers and incense. They sometimes asked lighthearted questions of the oracles, true - should I marry this girl, should I move to the next village over - but never without respect. When looking up towards the ever-present mountains, it is difficult not to understand how much the Gods deserve it. They are so much greater than us.

It makes me want to be the best I can be for them - to serve them in all my words and actions, like those who walked here before me did. To honour, too, and to remember these ancestors of mine, even if they are only ancestors in humanity.

My religion will come with me when I return, of course. But it is good to sit with these stones. Their warmth in the evening sun reminds me, despite these two thousand years, I am not alone.

(Pictures, in order: the temple of Apollon in Delphi, the oracle of Zeus in Dodona, the sanctuary in Delphi, the path up Mount Olympus, and the Erechtheion in Athens.)

Scream into the void with me about how cute Blitzen and Hearthstone are and how in love they are and they’re so in sync and how they just fully and utterly take care of one another and understand each other and they’re literally soulmates and I love them so much

Talk to me about how their dynamic works so well in alternate universes as well because they’re soulmates, that sort of bond transcends time, space, and circumstance. Hell, in canon they both came from separate worlds and still managed to meet, it was fate, you can fight me about this.

Also join my hype about how Blitzen said he was 20 in Sword of Summer. How he and Hearthstone had been following Magnus for two years, so they started when he was 18. And before that, there was the renaissance fair and Blitzen meeting Alderman and the illusion where Hearthstone mistook Blitzen for a warthog and almost killed him and them working for Mimir and we don’t know how many years ago that was or how long they had been working for him before Odin released them from that bondage and servitude. What we’ve seen of the two of them is literally just the tip of the iceberg. There’s so much there that can be explored and I have so many feelings about it.


i find it hilarious that i thought this fandom was good a few months ago. are you kidding me?

the fact that people think it’s okay to become antis of characters astounds me. what the fuck is wrong with you guys? you aren’t being forced to love a character, but making a blog dedicated to the hatred of characters actual people made and love with all of their heart?

it’s different when you hate on ships, when you talk about how much you wish a person wasn’t a love interest, or even was. that’s so different. in fact, differences of opinion are so so so so important. however, @playchoices made these characters.

they fucking love these characters. they’re love interests for a reason. they mean the world to a lot of people in the fandom as well. it’s in poor taste to make, for example, hate blogs in dedication to drake. i don’t give a crap if you don’t like drake.

i’m going to state my point again, and i know it’s redundant at this point, but seriously: these characters are made by the people you support and you throw it in their faces acting as if they made a bad one. do you even know the toxicity you are throwing into the fandom?

i don’t care if it’s a joke, or if you’re just that adamant about hating the character, or the art, or the book. if you hate rules of engagement, or if you love endless summer to death. at least have the decency to respect the people who made the books, characters, art, or storyline.

the only toxicity that comes from choices is the fandom that comes with the game. the bigger it grows, the nastier people get, and i am overwhelmed. when i first started playing this game, there was no fandom.

then, all of a sudden, blogs started popping up left and right, and i was ecstatic because people loved these books just as much as i did and that was amazing. i was excited to have a place to talk about choices. now? i feel as if i have to hold in every single opinion i have because someone is going to lash out at me, or worse, someone else.

does no one see how toxic that is?


if intelligence were the only criteria then i literally wouldn’t need a psychiatrist, would i?
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“It’s crazy how sometimes your life can change in a flash, and all the things you were blind to or refuse to admit are suddenly staring you right in the face. And just like that, everything suddenly falls into place… Even if it’s not the way you thought it would…

so i decided to draw my MC’s welcoming my new MC in HSS to the little universe! Lol I hope you like it!