i'm having so many feelings help me

I said “Can you give it back to me?”
She said “Never in your wildest dreams.”

Lucy & Loke from We Are Young: Track 19
…because no i’m not crying you’re crying

3

“Humans weren’t made to be alone, after all, so I was curious at first, thought you just might be an exception—but you seemed so… so miserable.”

In which Yuuri is the god of love and Victor forced himself into exile.

I got stuck in Dancing Daffodils hell, and if you haven’t read that fic yet, I highly suggest you give it a try!! I have just so many feels for it. @grayclouds is simply amazing. (ಥ﹏ಥ)

I know many things probably won’t be as accurate, but I needed to get it out of my system. rip

anonymous asked:

I've had ADHD my whole life and it's been a mountain of a struggle to get through basic tasks like studying. I've had to work extremely hard just to get by in school and college. I really wanted to be a doctor because I want to help other people with ADHD. I'm applying to med school right now and there's a chance I may get in. I wanted to know if there were any resources that could help me get through it. I know it's a stretch as med students are usually geniuses and I'm always behind. Thank you

Okay, so first thing I’d like to say is don’t sell yourself short. There are lots of gifted and talented individuals in STEM fields, but I think you’ll be surprised at how many people have to work their arse off to get into med school.

And you won’t be alone. It may feel like it at times, but there will be other neurodivergent students in your courses, if not ADHDers. In fact, there was research published late last year that revealed that the prevalence of individuals with disabilities in US medical schools was far higher than previously estimated, almost 3%, and ADHD topped the list!

It’s likely that, if you have provisions in place, you’ll get to know other students with disabilities, and they themselves can be a really great resource. Having support structures is important, but having people who actually get it because they have to deal with the same stuff you do every day, is amazing. 

I myself didn’t realise the value of this until I made friends with another ADHDer in my courses 12 months ago. It’s nice to have someone who you can vent to about ADHD and having to navigate the university system with a disability.

Unfortunately, there appear to be very few online communities for neurodivergent people in STEM - I looked for every variation on ADHD/ND in med school/STEM, and came up empty handed.

However, I did find a few Reddit threads that might help you:

I’ll leave you with this piece of encouragement which was sent to us about a year ago on anon:

I’m in med school right now, I have dyslexia and ADHD. I am not medicated and I want everyone to know that even though society looks down on us don’t ever look down on yourselves. We are so much more than what’s written on paper, don’t let anyone try to stop you from achieving your goals - especially not yourself. You can do whatever you want, even if it seems very very hard!

- Prue

Aw man I absolutely hate to beg but I’ve got less than no money right now and it makes me feel so down and stressed out .__. 

Please consider purchasing something from my shop and/or reblogging this so others can have a look. I’ve been working incredibly hard these months to try and make enough for my rent and bills, but I’ve gotten hit with 3 big bills this month and now I owe my flatmate money and it’s been difficult. I usually try to keep a positive attitude but all this has been getting to me, and it’s harder to keep my mood and productivity going. Thank you all for helping <3

Insecure.

I’m insecure. I hate things about myself. I feel like my insecurities are the only things that people see. I hate my nose, my teeth, my everything. I want to be like one of those completely gorgeous girls who don’t have to deal with huge flaws like me. I want to be less annoying. I want people to like me. I want to be better. I want someone to be there for me. I want to be different. I want so many things. I’m sorry I ask for so much I just want help…❌

Over the last two weeks I received many nice asks but I haven’t got any time to answer them because I focused on my exams. I am sorry for the wait!

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Hey! So I know you're super depressed and dont really open up and I'm guessing you want to die, but please dont! Your content makes so many people, just like me, laugh and help us have a better day. I don't know if you ever feel worthless or useless, but remember, you're making so many people laugh and happy, so thank you! Have a good day c:

Thank you❤️ this gives me a reason to live

anonymous asked:

Does anyone else ever feel like their ADHD is so similar to their autistic friends' autism? Like I'm pretty sure I'm not autistic... but my ADHD is so similar to my friends' autism and I relate to them so much and like so many resources for autistic people are super helpful to me too... idk I feel really weird about it... like I'm invading autistic spaces, but it's just so similar...

I am an “autistic cousin,” which means that while I do not have autism, I definitely show certain autistic traits and relate strongly to certain aspects of autistic experiences. It sounds like you are an AC as well.

I have many autistic friends, and none of them have ever implied that I am invading autistic spaces when I pipe in with my own experiences. I always make it clear that I’m not autistic but have ADHD, and then I say that I experience something similar to whatever it is they’re talking about. I am usually welcomed into discussions this way.

I do avoid posting to specifically autistic-only spaces, like the actuallyautistic tag here on Tumblr, and I don’t join autistic-only groups on Facebook and stuff like that. You can be a part of the community as a non-autistic person, you just have to make sure that you don’t accidentally or purposely suppress autistic voices and experiences – when we’re talking about autistic experiences, even if we have similar experiences, our experiences are not as important even if they are a connection point. Does that make sense?

-J

  • <p> <b></b> I'm having so many Andrew Garfield feels pls help meh 😩😩 I'm too obsessed with Hacksaw Ridge... anyway SEND ME REQUESTS! 💋💋<p/></p>
I'm Sorry : Alternate Ending

Many were already complaining by the fact that Idle was too much of a “pacifist” in Part 4.

Well. Here’s the thing.

I needed it to achieve a happy ending.

But if you wanted an angsty ending you could have said so from the start of this fanfic.

Welp. For all them people who wanted Idle to go “genocide”. (lookin at rouge and rey thotheyaremysenpais)

Here we go.

Don’t blame me if anything happens to you, ok?

——————————

Idle can’t believe what he is seeing.

Colonna, the once, sweet and cheerful Colly has become a ruthless MONSTER.

Idle can’t help but feel angry, sad and guilty at the same time.

And right now, he is looking at the sight of his ex-bestfriend, crying over the fact that she slashed Siren instead of him.

He looked around at his friends,

Xahji probably gonna be blind forever,

Dance loosing a hell lot of blood from his wound,

PaperJam holding on to Fresh as both of them slowly fall unconcious,

Cray helping them move together,

Swifty helping Snazzy,

And of course, Siren.

He has that one big slash across his chest.

Idle felt angry.

No, furious!

He will never unsee this at all.

He looks back at the still crying Colly, the blaze in her eye gone by now.

“You’ll pay for this…..” Idle murmured.

He saw the knife and picked it up, making sure that Colonna doesn’t notice.

He looked down at Colly who was on her knees and hands, orange tears still flowing like a waterfall.

He kneeled down to her level and hugged her. (don’t judge it yet, folks)

“I-Idle?” Colonna muttered as she felt Idle hug her.

“Colly……” Knife in hand, he quickly stabbed her at her back, deep and rough.

The pain rose up to Colonna as she muffled her own scream on Idle’s shoulder, grasping lots of his shirt.

“This was for hurting my friends….” Idle whispered to her, moving the knife slowly out of her back, making it more painful.

He let go of the hug and looked at Colonna’s face, blood dripping at the side of her mouth.

“This is for everything else.” Idle stabbed her again, this time, straight to her chest that cages her soul. If she even has one..

Slowly, her grip on Idle goes weak. She is becoming more weak as more and more of her blood drip down her back.

Oddly so, Colonna looked at Idle one last time with eyes that seem…… Happy?

She smiled and mouthed a thank you as she slowly turned to dust, covering Idle’s bloody shirt.

Her face before she died made the cracks on Idle’s Soul grow worst. He felt it.

His tears run down his face as he too, slowly turn to dust, inch by inch.

“Idle?” Swifty called out to him.

He didn’t respond. He just went next to Siren.

“Idle….” Siren held Idle’s cheek with his hand.

Idle kissed Siren one last time before his remaining parts slowly turned to dust as well.

Siren’s tears broke free, staining the ground.

He grasped the remaining clothes that was left of his lost lover.

Error opened the rooftop door just in time to see Idle completely turn to dust.

Cray was at the corner, crying next to Fresh and PJ, while Swifty was hugging the clothes of both his dead friends, crying loudly.

Goth quickly rushed to his sister who was still hugging Snazzy.

Palette, Ink and Error went straight to Paperjam, Fresh and Cray.

Nightmare rushed to Swifty, Siren and Dance, calling the police and the ambulance.

Ring. Ring. Ring.

“Hello, 911?”

“What do you need, sir?”

“There’s been death at UnderHigh.”

——————————

Mun: I…. @blogthegreatrouge !! Lookit what she did to your Colonna!! @reyindee !! IDLE DIED

Originally posted by n-wordbelike

anonymous asked:

hi so I was wondering if you could tell me the best way to start off writing fics on tumblr? It feels like I'm asking a stupid question but there's just so many blogs on tumblr and I always feel so silly when I post, and end up taking them down, partly because of the fact that having it sit there gets me anxious and partly because I feel like my writing is... crap. Yeah. Help?

I get this question a lot and I never know what good advice to give because I don’t think there’s something you have to do if you want to post your stories online. If you love writing and you want to share your stories with people, you should post them. Don’t doubt yourself and your writing! 

  • Notes - Don’t worry about notes at all, especially if you’re just starting out. Notes don’t guarantee quality at all. I’ve read great fics with a lot less notes than they deserve, and I’ve read fics I didn’t really like that got a lot of notes. I know it sucks to post something you’ve worked hard on and not get any feedback on it, but everyone started out that way. It’s a lot easier to start if you already have some followers, or if you’re friends with someone who has a lot of followers, or if someone shouts you out. If not, you will have to start from scratch, but if you like writing, you should focus on that and not the notes. I think I’ve said this before, but when I first started writing Sin City, nobody was reading it. I liked the story that I had in my head and I wanted to write it down, even if there were only a couple of people that gave some sort of feedback on it. You just need to keep posting if you like what you’re posting, and try not to worry about the notes too much. A lack of notes doesn’t mean your stories aren’t good! Maybe people still didn’t get a chance to find out about your blog. Also, there’s a lot of people who follow you and read your stories but never give any type of feedback, and I know for a fact there are people who don’t follow you, but read your fics anyway. And when I first got into BTS, I’d read fics even though I didn’t have a Tumblr, so I couldn’t like or reblog anything. Just keep posting your stories and try not to worry about the notes too much.
  • Tagging - It’s really important to properly tag your stuff. If you’re a fic writer, there’s no need for you to tag a Jungkook story with “Yoongi smut” or “Jimin gif”. Personally, when I’m looking for something specific, I hate seeing stuff that doesn’t belong in that tag because it makes it so much harder for me to find what I’m looking for, and I’m definitely not going to click on a Jungkook smut story if I’m out there looking for a specific Jimin gif. The first five tags are the ones that show up in the search, so those are the most important ones. Tag the genre and the members that are involved. 
  • Networks - I don’t know when exactly, but I joined @kwritersnet and it’s  a great network for sharing your stories with people, but also for finding new stories. Since the tags are full of things that don’t belong there, I never go through them. When I look for new stuff to read, I usually scroll through the network tag and I find something new every time. I suggest you try joining that network or a similar one - it’s a good way to meet new people and share your stories with them.
  • Asking other writers to read your stories - I see that a lot of people do this, and I’m conflicted about it. I’ve never felt confident enough to send a story of mine to someone and ask them to read it, but a lot of people have sent me their stories and I didn’t have a problem with that. The thing is, the busier you get, the less time you have for writing, let alone reading. So sometimes, writers won’t really have the time to read your story and you’ll put them in an uncomfortable position if you ask them to read something of yours when they don’t have any free time. I feel horrible when I have to turn people down, especially if I know they read my stories, but I have so many things to do that I can’t even keep up with the fics I’m already reading.
  • Feedback - This might be just me, but I feel like a lot of people on this site expect feedback even though they never actually give it. I’ve had a lot of people message me for the first time saying they love my stories and asking for me to reblog their story or read it or give feedback, which I have no problem with, but I’ve never even seen their urls before which means they never gave any type of feedback to me, whether it be likes, reblogs, asks, messages. I’m not saying you have to give feedback, but if you’re claiming you love someone’s work, why aren’t you giving them any kind of feedback, but expect them to give you some? I feel like some of these messages are just generic messages that get sent to a lot of writers at the same time, and I don’t like being treated like one out of 50 options. Besides, if you’re a writer, you know how much feedback means, even if it’s constructive criticism. If you interact with other writers, you have a better chance of them noticing your stories and checking them out. I’m saying this because I know @noona-la-la-la, for example, found my blog because I reblogged a story of hers and gave feedback in the tags. I found a lot writers that way too since I always check the tags on my stories. 
  • If you follow me, you can always send me a link to your story and I’ll add it to my stories to read post :)

Good luck !! :)

anonymous asked:

i feel like i'm being selfish and irrational but every time a friend of mine gets a crush i just prepare myself for being pushed to the background. i hate being aro honestly this has happened so many times and i'm really tired of friends forgetting about me because they got an s/o

I absolutely get this feeling. I’m in a relationship and it happens to me even. It’s good to acknowledge the feeling and not shame yourself for it. As long as you aren’t acting of these feelings to harm yourself or them I don’t see a problem. It’s an okay feeling to have. Voice it when it helps you keep friendships alive.

anonymous asked:

So I know a lot of autistics who are really proud to be autistic and I think that's great and I wish I could be like that but I just don't know how. I hate all my autistic traits. I hate that I'm bad at conversation, I hate that I take everything people say seriously, I hate that I never know the right thing to say. I talk about my special interests, which no one cares about, too much. I have barely any friends. Everyone I meet thinks I'm weird. I don't know what to do anymore.

I’m gonna let you in on a secret. Even I feel this way sometimes. There’s so many things I really kinda hate about being autistic, especially things like my poor concentration, audio processing issues, needing to be given instructions 2, 3, 4, 5 times before I even begin to be able to remember them. Slow reaction times, poor decision making, sensory integration issues. Having absolutely no idea how to help the people I care about when they need me. I could go on and on.

Now, the thing is, though, that even if I didn’t have any of these issues, even if I wasn’t autistic, I’d still find things to hate about myself. Maybe ‘cause I have depression, maybe ‘cause it’s ingrained in people from a very young age that you have to hate yourself otherwise you’ll never improve, or you’re too full of yourself, or you haven’t done anything to deserve to not hate yourself. And these things are ingrained in neurodivergent kids tenfold. That’s why radical self-love is so important to so many of us.

I can guarantee that every single autistic person, even those of us who are super proud of being autistic, has something they hate about themselves, that they wish they could change or get rid of. That’s the human experience. You could take away every single thing you hate about yourself, and all that would happen is you’d find something else to hate.

It sounds super pessimistic, I know. But you are what you are. You can’t change it. You’re stuck with it, no take-backs. What you can change is how accepting you are of yourself. How much you care about other’s perceptions of you versus how much you care about your own perceptions of yourself. What those perceptions of yourself are. That’s something you can change. But you’ve gotta want to.

-Brother Cat

Brother Cat’s right. Even though we’ll sometimes be proud of who we are, we also go through a lot of self-doubt. I’ve dealt with this more than I’d like in the past three years of being unemployed and feeling like either no one understands me or no one wants to hire autistic people like me. I’ve dealt with it all my life in all the bullying and other crap people have thrown at me all my life (even before I knew I was autistic). It sucks. But remember–it’s not your fault you’re autistic. It makes life incredibly difficult, yes, but that’s why you have to keep persisting.

I know this sounds cheesy and trite, but find those good things about yourself. Find the ways that being autistic can benefit you and the people around you, like (for example) thinking outside the box or catching details that others may have missed and making everyone’s lives that much better as a result. That’s what I do, at least.

- Auntie Cat

ok, this is going to look really weird since it’s been almost 2 years,, ,

but- im gonna do it

i’m gonna change my icon 0 ^ 0) !

pls pls pls check out the original drawing of Mizar here! and give it a like, they deserve it! >>> https://www.pixiv.net/member_illust.php?mode=medium&illust_id=50986943

Because you are perfection. Poetry in motion. You capture the light and reflect it back in a rainbow of colors. You made the world more radiant, and for some unknown reason, you decided to let me join you in this achingly gorgeous world of yours.
—  A dear friend when asked why they got so attached to me in particular

I HIT 900 FOLLOWERS!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

thank you all so much! I literally love you all so much and I can’t believe this is true! how can I have 900 followers ?? you guys are so amazing and I can’t help but feel so surprised I would have never thought I would get this many followers and in such a small time!  you guys are so crazy and I love you so so so much!! I'm like having a heart attack right now and this is still so crazy to me!! the next milestone is 1,000 and that's when I start to die! you guys are just so freaking crazy and I love you so so so much!!! thank you, all for 900 and I know this is short but I can’t even explain in words how happy I am!! also want to say thank you to a lot of people for helping me get here but I don’t want this to be too long so ill list a few! @batfamily-imagines @crazyfangirl1810 @soepicsokim @alfred-the-cat-writes @angstytodd @tim-help and so many more of you! thank you all so many guys for keeping me motivated and just being my friend! I love you all so much! thank you!

p.s if your wondering I’m talking to te’a again! or @alfred-the-cat-writes  

4

anonymous asked:

Hey :) I am a big fan of yours and your art tutorials haven been incredibly helpful in my journey as an artist ( i still have a lot to learn :D but i feel much more confident now) I usually draw Supernatural and occasionally Hannibal, but my best friend watched Sherlock with me and I wanted to make an art calender containing different fandoms as a christmas present. My problem is BC's face is far from standard and i'm really struggling with the sherlock portraits. Could you maybe help me? <3

So I actually find him a little easier to draw because of his distinct features! Here’s my old tutorial for studying faces which I’ll run through again with BC’s face.

Once you’ve set up as many lines as you need you can start analyzing shapes

He’s got really heavy brows that look like wierd trapezoids haha ;; and his eye shape is similar but with a curved underside

The bridge of his nose is pretty wide and about the same width all the way down. Ends in a V shape 

Really pronounced cupid’s bow. Pretty much looks like 2 triangles connected at a point

And yeah! Just put it all together.

If you’re having trouble drawing portraits from different angles I’d be happy to take a look at what you’ve got and give you some feedback. My inbox is always open!

WHO WANTS TO KNOW WHY I DUCKING LOVE "I DONT EVEN KNOW YOUR NAME"

No one, what a shame.

Sit yo ass down, shut up and read for a sec.

It reminds me to look for the little details, it reminds me that you can fall in love with something you see for an instant,
It shows me how important those little moments are, you can fall in love with a glance and it can be just as strong


It makes realise that humans aren’t set to hate people, we are set to love each other, hate is taught to us and we can deny it

I love the idea of seeing someone across a crowded room and falling in love for a sec, you don’t have to do anything about it

It’s just a pure feeling, and it reminds me that even if I have a shit day, someone may have felt that, for just a sec, they Felt that, the tiniest thing, that the person didn’t even realise they were doing, it made someone’s day.

The tiniest things Have the biggest impacts, like the way this one song, can bring out all this. It just makes me realise how every little thing It’s connected, and it doesn’t matter who we are, what we do, where we are from, we are all connected even if it is just by The fact that we breather oxygen, we live on earth.

Everyone is link, by invisible threads, which are so tiny, almost Unnoticeable, but when you take a step back you see the connections, like a giant spiders web, every person weaving a thread Into the loop until we are all stood together.


So thank you Shawn mendes.

You made me get my shit together and realise a few things.