i'm having phil feelings

In light of recent events...

I’m disgusted with events that took place over the last 12 hours or so on Twitter, and I’m even more disgusted that this is a thing that happens repetitiously. So, here is a list of basic etiquette for meeting DnP in public. Honestly all of this is common sense, but apparently some people need to be reminded of it:

(Once you have read this, you have absolutely no excuses for your actions should you ever meet them (not that you had any excuses to begin with) and shall have 100% responsibility for your actions.)

(Also, these rules apply to any stars/celebrities/humans in general that you may encounter and apply in any location or scenario.)

  • DON’T take videos or photos of them without their consent, full stop. It’s a breach of their privacy, which goes against their fundamental human rights and is therefore illegal in almost all countries around the world, countries like Australia and the UK included…
  • …and if you do, DO delete it/them, especially if they ask you to. Again, it’s illegal and just morally wrong to take/keep/post non-consensual footage of them.
  • DON’T follow them or stalk them. It’s common sense and is for the same reasons as I listed above (it’s illegal), so if I get anyone questioning why, I will be really disgusted and disappointed.
  • DO go to meetups if you want selfies and if you want to meet them. The very reason meetups exist is so that you can meet your favourite stars in a consensual and relaxed environment, so take advantage of that rather than springing a trap on them outside of said consensual environments.
  • DO remember that DnP are no more or less human than us. I’ve seen people using the argument that they’re celebrities and that they should expect to be followed and whatnot, but they have the right to privacy as much as any of us and can feel frustration as much as any of us, so treat them like you’d treat any normal member of the public.
  • DO remember to distinguish between running into them coincidentally and deliberately tracking or following them. Running into them coincidentally is something you didn’t expect or intend to happen, therefore not your fault. Following or tracking them is 100% a conscious action so you are expect to take full responsibility for whatever may happen.
  • DON’T use “Oh but it’s a public area” as an excuse for following them. I’ve seen and argued with so many people who have used that excuse, but it doesn’t make following them any less morally or legally corrupt. Just because it may be deemed a public area doesn’t mean they’re always willing to interact with any people in it in a public manner. They are in public for the sake of sorting out shit for their own personal lives, it’s not an automatic invitation for anyone and everyone to follow them. Besides, Dan specifically said in a liveshow not to follow them in airports, so listen to them when they say that and assume the same request applies for any other public area.
  • DON’T think that they’re okay with being followed just because they offer to take selfies or whatever or because they don’t call you out on following them. I do wish DnP had more backbone regarding this, but the only reason they may agree to interacting with you is because they’re very selfless men who put their viewers wants (wants, not needs, because meeting them is not a necessity in life) before their own, however that doesn’t mean they’re comfortable doing it. Don’t take advantage of that selflessness.
  • DON’T remain under the impression that they live to serve us. They are under no obligation to do anything for us, not even on the internet, and it’s only because they’re good and admittedly-over-generous people that they do so in the first place. Just because they’re entertainers online sometimes doesn’t mean they’re idols to be objectified and dehumanised all the time, everywhere. They have their own lives and personal needs, exactly the same as we do.
  • DON’T be surprised if you receive backlash for doing things like what those people did today, you deserve every nasty tweet, post and DM you receive (unless you receive death threats or anything like that, which is never okay).
  • DON’T feel you have the right to defend yourself if you receive backlash, because you honestly don’t.

One final thought: you ever think about why celebrities imply or say that they want to live a ‘normal’ life? It’s because of stalkers and followers like the ones today, people who completely dehumanise them and put them on a pedestal where they’re expected to stay and be leered at 24/7. It’s not fair to enforce this on fellow human beings, especially with human beings as gracious and patient with us as DnP are. You don’t deserve to be called a ‘fan’ if you can’t love and value and respect them properly.

When You Take Me There

Genre: fluff af. like actual cotton candy i swear

Word Count: 1.2k

Summary: A very in-depth confession of love from Phil to Dan based on and inspired by the song ‘Durban Skies’ by Bastille. (Written in Phil’s POV)

Warnings: tiny mention of alcohol?? slight suggestion of sex? idk it is definitely 100% SFW

a/n: this is the first ever actual good thing i’ve written in my life I hope it’s enjoyable and ik the punctuation is probably horrendous but idk who needs rules of the english language lmao. hope u all enjoy (also if you find any typos or anything pls lmk as it’s currently 4:30am and i’m like half asleep)

~

You are all that I’ve got to be thankful for.

Well, technically there’s a lot of things I’m thankful for. But nothing as important as you.

You. Dan Howell. The love of my life. My hopes, dreams, aspirations; my everything.

I know I want to be with you forever.

Our love incomparable, our souls inseparable. Nothing could ever break our bond, our hearts perfectly entangled together, like our fingertips on a dreaded, rainy, mid-Sunday taxi drive to the grocery store. Like our legs on a lazy Tuesday as we swear at each other playing Mario Kart. Like our bodies the first time we met, both of us shaking with nervousness and sweating like dogs. I am in love with you.

You outweigh any form of negativity I have ever come across.

You are all I need. One look at you- a glance into your beautiful, dark coffee-stained eyes, and I am at peace with all in my life. All that isn’t you, anyways. I am always at peace with you.

You are my entire life, and always have been.

I fondly remember the beginning. Vivid memories of carelessness and the feeling of newly found love. The long train rides you took to close the gap between us. All the thoughtless walks around Manchester, the cheesy coffee and cinema dates, as well as the angsty nights at my house when I secretly gave you alcohol after promising my parents I wouldn’t- and getting a bit drunk. Sometimes too drunk perhaps, which led to some out of hand things. I don’t even want to know what we did, as all I remember is one time waking up to you asleep naked on my family’s dining room table. They luckily weren’t home that week. You cried over how bad you felt, and I cheered you up by ordering Indian food and wrapping us both up on the couch in a blanket as we watched our favorite childhood cartoons. You are really something else, and I couldn’t ask for any better.

Back then I could only imagine what we would experience together.

I had no idea we, as a duo, would become at all known to the world. I didn’t think about all the lives we would change and all the places we’d go and all the amazing friends we would make. All I knew for sure was that I wanted you in my arms till the day I’d die, and to this day that is still all I live by.

I am so thankful to have you next to me in my life.

Moving to London was a major risk for us. We went through some difficult hardships career-wise, but deep down I knew it would work out. Anything can work out as long as I’m with you. Our love can conquer any and all obstacles.

I understand how you work.

Your thought process, your creative sources, how your mind works. I can tell how you feel at anytime, in any situation. Parties, events, when you’re stressing about what to do for the next scene in a video. I know that the only way you can sleep most nights is if I softly play with your fingers, and if the comforter is tucked in between your knees because you hate when your bare legs are touching under the blanket as it’s too warm and it makes you feel gross. I know you better than anyone else.

You make me feel like I can live forever.

Nothing matters when our bodies are pressed together like the waves and the shore on a humid, sunny day at dusk. You know that feeling you get when you finally fit the last piece into a puzzle you’ve been working on for weeks? That feeling of completion and relief, the satisfaction and pleasure your body experiences fitting that puzzle piece perfectly into it’s place and seeing the whole picture? That’s how I feel laying next to you. When I cover your rosy face in gentle kisses every morning and when our arms embrace every time we see each other after being apart. Maybe not exactly like that, actually. Multiply that feeling by about… infinity. The way you make me feel is simply indescribable.

You’ve made me view things from a whole new perspective.

I think back to when we first walked through town together and our hair wouldn’t stop going nuts in the wind and I kept complaining and got frustrated. Your hands reached down to mine and held on just tight enough and everything was instantly calm in my mind. You taught me how to be the best person I can be and told me everything I needed to hear and more. I am forever grateful for your impact on my life.

You are the only person I want to spend my life with.

I personally don’t think weddings are the most important part of a relationship, but I know how much you look forward to ours. I often imagine seeing your gravity-defying smile and glistening eyes of endearment as we exchange I do’s and an everlasting kiss to seal everything we’ve shared since way back when. Seeing you happy is what’s most important to me.

It’s a miracle this ever worked out and I am forever grateful.

The slightest of changes in one of our paths could’ve caused everything to be different. It’s insane to think that if I hadn’t bought that exact box of cereal that one day, I would’ve never experimented with the camera I won and started uploading to youtube when I did. Every single specific decision each of us made somehow lead to this and it’s honestly terrifying to think about how easily we could’ve never even acknowledged each other, and none of this would be happening right now. I have no words for how thankful I am that things happened the way they did.

I was always told that it wouldn’t work, but look at where we are now.

I was told not to trust you. That you were just some stranger. That you were too young and naïve, and that it wasn’t really love and that it was all just excitement. I hope they realize how wrong they were whenever they see our faces in magazines and our names in headlines. I hope they’re constantly reminded that we were different and that we made it. We made it together.

All those four am skype call sessions to the four am sunrises we’d watch from outside your family’s house to the four am netflix show binges in bed that became the only normality we know of today.

The countless amount of train rides to see each other, to the countless amount of plane rides to travel the world together. Everything is more beautiful when you’re by my side.

The hundreds of days and nights spent embraced in your arms and the hundreds and hundreds more I look forward to. You are my definition of warmth and my meaning of home and you are everything I could ever want and everything I don’t deserve and everything else that is good in the world.

You are the best person in the world. I love you so much, Dan, and I know I will love you as long as we both shall live. You complete me in every way, and you are all I’ve got to be thankful for. 

~

You know, I think the biggest difference between RoboMay and Melinda is really just the talking

Melinda doesn’t push, she doesn’t pry. (Maybe sometimes, when it’s for a mission or something). Other people give her information, or she figures things out in her head without asking. She almost always keeps her thoughts/questions to herself. 

Which, by the way, I think is another great yin-yang aspect she has with Phil. Phil is constantly asking questions out loud. It’s how he thinks (i.e., the Tai Chi scene). He also pokes and prods and pushes people until they give him an answer. Phil and Melinda balance each other out that way. I’m not sure Melinda would have ever told Phil about seeing him when she died, except that he kept dogging her about it. RoboMay, on the other hand, DOES ask questions frequently and pushes for answers. About missions and information (especially about the Darkhold, of course), but also when it comes to Phil (which makes sense, because whether she knows it or not, she IS on a mission, so she naturally pushes). 

I think the biggest distinction between them is not that Melinda doesn’t think/feel the same way as RoboMay, but that with Melinda, there’s always something holding her back from actually saying it. That’s why I’ve always headcanoned that Phil would have to be the one to cross the boundary in their relationship, because Melinda won’t do it–unless maybe she KNOWS he feels the same way. I don’t think Melinda would have told Phil to “start taking chances” the way RoboMay did, nor do I think she would have told him about going to Ireland together (at least not so obviously)–and not because she doesn’t want to say it, not because she doesn’t feel the same, but because she would stop herself from saying it. 

RoboMay’s programming, on the other hand, lets her overcome Melinda’s apprehension/fear/whatever it is that holds her back. It removes that barrier that Melinda created in order to stay distanced from Phil just enough that they didn’t cross that line between friends/partners and lovers. That’s why things have been progressing so quickly between RoboMay and Phil, whereas he and Melinda have been moving at a slower pace since the beginning of the show, and most notably this season. That’s my theory, anyway.

9

“Oh, my back’s up against the wall, I feel guilty. And you want nothing in return, I feel guilty.”

- - - - -

Not too bad for my first attempt at a moodboard!

This was inspired by the incredible two fic art thief verse created by the immensely talented @leblonde, and the song “An Act of Kindness” by Bastille, which I can no longer listen to without immediately thinking of this AU.

gonna enjoy having this on my wall for the next month

  • me: i'm glad that dan and phil have a separate place to film and feel more at ease knowing that they have a greater deal of privacy :))
  • also me: i want to see everything, i want a full tour, i want to know where the walls are dented and what colour every wall is, i want to be able to paint murals of the entire place,,, please satisfy my curiosity!!

*cries because school gets in the way of the one thing I actually care about right now: dan and phil*

if dan and phil film a day in the life of tatinof i would give anything to see them after the show beaming from ear to ear and filled with the nervous energy that comes after you perform in front of a crowd

Okay I really don’t like the way that the author of the article approached it but I really appreciate Dan and Phil’s responses? Like the bit when the interviewer was basically trying to insult their younger fans and Dan completely shut him down. They’re willing to stand up for their fans in a world that tries to invalidate anything that is enjoyed by young people (especially young girls) and it’s so important to see people who don’t try to distance themselves from this portion of their fan base.
Dan and Phil are so close to their fans and so appreciative of us and I just… I’m so thankful for them honestly