i'm gonna kiss your stupid face

the signs as aph quotes
  • aries: If you don't disappear while I'm tying my shoelace I'm gonna flip you over (Netherlands)
  • taurus: vODKAAAAAAA (Russia)
  • gemini: No one asked you, cheesy monkey (England)
  • cancer: What the crappola happened here?! (Romano)
  • leo: Whoa, ice cream? I'm totally coming there to hug you (America)
  • virgo: I hide dark secret no one will guess because of my sweet face (Russia)
  • libra: I am far way too gorgeous to have been in a stuffy room for so long (France)
  • scorpio: I once killed a man in his sleep with its own moustache and a grape (Germany)
  • sagittarius: I'm so hot I could kiss myself (England)
  • capricorn: When I look into all of your stupid faces, I think how fun it will be to pound them into dust (Russia)
  • aquarius: Oh no! I suck! (Ukraine)
  • pisces: My only friend growing up was a yak (Russia)

Max and Victoria as the kind of girlfriends who draw ugly pictures of each other and use them as matching profile pictures. Terms of endearment include: “Shitlord” “Loser” “Doucheface” and of course “Your Highness”. 

Max and Victoria calling each other mean names and telling one another to shut their stupid face “or I’m gonna kiss you so freaking hard”. If anyone else takes to else talks to them like that, then they’re faced with the full fury of both of them.

Victoria photoshopping Max’s face onto animal memes and posting them all over Facebook. 

Max turning Victoria’s selfie wall into a dick shaped collage.


  • Regina: So did you open your jungle book for him?
  • Emma: Regina...
  • Regina: *chuckles* I'm sorry. It's just banana's that you-
  • Emma: Regina please, I don't want to talk about it.
  • Regina: Of course.It must have been nice though. Him politely picking the bugs out of your hair and what not.
  • Emma: I swear to god...
  • Regina: What are you going to do Dr.Dolittle?
  • Emma: Say one more thing and I'm gonna wipe that stupid smirk off your face.
  • Regina: Oh? Please Ms. Swan...no monkey business. I'd hate to- *Regina get's cut off by Emma kissing her*
  • Emma: *backs away and notices the blush on Regina's face* Told you.
  • Regina: ...I guess I could say you find me... a-ppealing?
  • Emma: God dammit!

Kay but think about cuddly calum and he’d be so cute with his arms lazily wrapped around your torso as he buries his face in your neck and you would try to get up but he would tighten his grip and keep nuzzling into you lightly kissing your shoulder before you turned over to look at him all sleepy like and his eyes would still be droopy and a stupid tired smile would be on his face and he would whisper good morning his voice so raspy and fuck I want this so bad


TEW Secret Exchange for number 10! Merry christmas!

As many other Joseb shippers, I joined the fuckyeahjoseb Secret TEW Holiday Exchange! The very kind n°10 said they liked Joseb and Ruvik… And their message was so kind and sweet I thought I could draw both!:D

I hope, dear n°10, that you like these drawings.
Also, I’m sorry, there’s no scanner at my girlfriend’s place, so I took them in photo instead. When I’ll get back to my place, around the 8th of january, I’ll be able to scan these. :)

ps: In fact, I totally imagined a sweet scene for the Joseb drawing of Joseph giving Sebastian a big scarf for Christmas, since the detective often has his coat open and neck exposed to the winter cold… But Sebastian is his stubborn self and never closes it. So Joseph would come closer and try to properly tie the scarf around his neck, making Sebastian grab him and lean in for a kiss… But I can’t write so that’s all I can give you! xD

ps2: yeah I like stupid captions. <<