i'm allowed because i'm doing this for science

The signs as things my science teacher has said
  • Aries: "This room is so echoe-y because under the floor here I buried the skulls of children who waste my time"
  • Taurus: "NO food of ANY KIND, no matter WHO YOU ARE, is allowed in this room" he says as he shoves a handful of chips in his mouth
  • Gemini: "The best way to steal children from the park is to steal the one farthest from it's mother"
  • Cancer: "Water bottles are a girls enemy"
  • Leo: "I'm a god so I don't know why I'm here"
  • Virgo: Student: I need to use the bathroom "I mean...there's a trashcan over there"
  • Libra: Student: Can we hug you? "I don't think I'm legally allowed to do that"
  • Scorpio: "Since I'm a teacher I'm poor so I make most of my money by stealing shoes from children and selling them. Mostly my students who won't take their shoes off my desks."
  • Sagittarius: "Don't joke about making meth. Because I'll think you're also a drug dealer and you're here to steal me turf."
  • Capricorn: "So like there's a student in the science closet here his name is Jimmy and I let him out at night to eat the cockroaches"
  • Aquarius: "You think water is forgiving and nice, but it's not. Because of surface tension, if you fell from maybe say, a very tall bridge, your stomach is going to split open when you fall. Water hates you. It doesn't love you."
  • Pisces: "On a very personal level, I hate fish"