i'm a mess and you know that i can't help it

Deep Ass Starters.
  • Sometimes it's hard to get in depth with your muse and their backstory, because you can't figure out how to bring those things up with others. Here are a couple of starters intended to make things a little more personal!
  • "What's holding you back?"
  • "I'm not comfortable with this conversation."
  • "Will you /ever/ be comfortable with this conversation?"
  • "Let me in sometime!"
  • "It's not that easy, you know."
  • "Help me understand."
  • "It's hard to connect with someone when all they do is push you away."
  • "Why are you always so cold?"
  • "Why are you always so happy?"
  • "Are you really happy now?"
  • "Who hurt you this badly to make you this way?!"
  • "What, did your ex mess you up that badly?!"
  • "Why do you keep fighting it any time you feel?"
  • "It's a problem, I get it."
  • "This is all kinds of messed up."
  • "That's not exactly a good coping method."
  • "So what happened, with your parents, really?"
  • "What was your childhood like?"
  • "Everyone has at lest a little bit of mommy/daddy issues. It's nothing to be ashamed of."
  • "My parents aren't exactly perfect models, either."
  • "You were bullied? What for?"
  • "Was it hard? Coming out, I mean."
  • "You can't just run away all the time."
  • "You can't just hide all the time."
  • "Are you still thinking about them?"
  • "I'm not the enemy here. But this makes me wonder who the real one is for you."
  • "Is the reason you're so cold and defensive because you feel threatened?"
  • "How long has it been since you last spoke to them?"
  • "You never talk about it, why?"
  • "How come you're so different around them?"
  • "It's like you don't have a care or worry in the world."
  • "You seem so perfect. I don't get it."
  • "What was your ex like?"
  • "I don't think I was ever good enough for them."
  • "Are you not comfortable being intimate?"
  • "Why don't you feel comfortable being intimate?"
  • "Letting someone see you that vulnerable, it's a scary thing."
  • "Are you scared of being hurt?"
  • "Have you ever been taken advantage of?"
  • "Why are you afraid of saying I love you?"
  • "I never understood how someone could say those words so easily."
  • "You're hurting others the way you've been hurt in the past, don't you think that's ironic?"
  • "You use people to make yourself feel better."
  • "I'm scared of being used again..."
  • "Losing someone isn't easy, but you're making it harder than it needs to be."
  • "How long has it been since you lost them?"
  • "You're too attached."
  • "I'm not attached, I'm just comfortable with what I'm familiar to."
  • "Maybe the real reason you're so controlling is because, deep down you'd rather have them in your grasp than lose them."
  • "Why did you ever break up?" / "Why did we ever break up?"
I'm probably looking WAY too into this...

…but today’s video, “ANTINATOR | Akinator #8” just did not sit well with me, and I’ll tell you why. Keep in mind, this is just a theory! Just a good ol’ fun and harmless theory, so relax!

I keep rewatching the video and I can’t get over some of the answers Jack gives, let alone how he answers. Going with the theory that Anti has been around since Halloween, then that means we’re probably not watching Jack, we’re watching Anti. And if we’re watching Anti, then to me, it makes a lot of sense why his behavior seemed suspicious and odd.

For more than half the video, Jack was freely talking about Anti, and when it came to the question about whether or not his character was a part of a comedic duo, Jack went on to joke about the idea of him and Anti being like the Odd Couple. While that is an admittedly a very amusing idea, I couldn’t help but think about the theory of us watching Anti. This only then made me wonder if maybe Anti was taking a jab at us for turning him into a joke by pretending to be Jack poking fun at him. But this wasn’t the only thing that didn’t sit right with me.

There was the answer to “does your character have fingers?”, which was accompanied with a signature demonic laugh that we all know belongs to our glitch son (which immediately sent chills up my spine). But the thing that unnerved me the most - the thing I can NOT get over no matter how many times I think about it - is this:

When it came to the question of “is your character real?”. I keep replaying that part over and over again to watch Jack’s facial expression, and it’s not sitting well with me. After reading the question, he takes a moment to think over his answer - he actually HESITATES to give a reply (he even glances up off into the distance to think it over).

He then turns to the camera and says “No”. But what I noticed after watching it a second and third time is if you look closely, right as he says his answer, the corner of his lips tug up into a very petite smirk for a fleeting second. Blink and you’ll miss it. It’s like he KNOWS he’s not telling the truth - he KNOWS he’s lying through his teeth.

He then pauses and takes a VERY brief side glance, like he’s contemplating whether that was the right answer or not.

And almost immediately, he decides to go and say “Technically - Technically, no”. He STUTTERS over his words when giving the final answer. And what the hell does he mean by “technically”?! It was a yes or no question, Jack, and you decided to go with “technically no”?

So what I’ve got from this is that if we’re going with the idea that Anti’s been in control, then we’ve been watching him. And at that specific part of the video, the entire thing just does NOT seem right. He hesitated to give an answer - TWICE, he smirked for a second while looking directly at the camera when giving the first “No”, and he stuttered when he changed his answer to “Technically no”. I felt like Anti was playing with us - like he knew he was lying through his teeth, but he wanted to mess with us.

I know, I know, I’m probably looking WAY into this, but again, it’s just a fun little theory that immediately came to mind when I was watching the video. And honestly, if Anti has been in control all this time and that’s who we’ve been watching, we are all SO very much dead. He was pretty much mocking us about how we’ve made him into a joke, and let’s face facts, I’m sure all of us got a chuckle out of the idea of Jack and Anti as a comedy duo. It’s only proving to him how we do think of him as a joke, and it’s going to bite us in the ass.

Tomorrow’s October 1st and I don’t know about any of you guys, but I can already feel the overwhelming dread and anxiety creeping up on me.

We.

Are.

All.

FUCKED.

@yourestillnotmytype-58, @septic-obsessed, @golden-eyed-guardians, @no-strings-puppet, @fear-is-nameless

🎶🎶When You Collect Records🎶🎶
  • Hipster: *moves dusty old boxes out of the way* Whoa, an old record player. It looks like it's in working order too! *runs outside*
  • Hipster: Yo, dad!
  • Dad: What?
  • Hipster: We're getting rid of all of poppop's stuff, right?
  • Dad: There's something you want, isn't there?
  • Hipster: There's this old stereo record player in the attic.
  • Dad: What do you need a record player for?
  • Hipster: My record collection.
  • Dad: I didn't even know they still made those things. Can't you just listen to music on your phone?
  • Hipster: Dad, there's a big difference between listening to music digitally and on record.
  • Dad: Fine, I don't wanna get into it with you right now. You can take the record player. You just have to get someone else to take it to your place for you. My truck's full.
  • Hipster: Thanks dad! *smooches dad on the cheek*
  • *later at hipster's apartment*
  • Friend: So, like Patch Adams ends with Patch Adams half-naked in front of a ton of people. I don't know if it was meant to be funny or like a weird sex thing, but like the movie was just a deeply disturbing character study. I can't stop thinking about it.
  • Hipster: That sounds boring. *unlocks door to apartment* Ta-da! Here it is! My new record player!
  • Friend: New? Looks fucking old to me, dude.
  • Hipster: Well, it is old. That's the appeal. And we're going to listen to the new Sufjan record on it.
  • Friend: Is that actually how you say Sufjan? Apparently, I've been pronouncing it wrong this whole time.
  • Hipster: Well, you won't after this record. There's an entire track where he just says his name for four minutes. It's amazing. *plays records*
  • Record Player: *coughs* Hello. Hello! Where am I? Doctor? Hello! Why is it so dark...............................Can I breathe? I can't breath. Oh god, I'm not breathing! Oh god, oh god, oh god, oh god, oh god! I.....................................
  • Hipster: Uh, that's not Sufjan.
  • Friend: It totally isn't. Is it some guest vocalist? I like the new direction he's going in. No instruments or singing, and long stretches of silence. Very experimental.
  • Hipster: *stops record player* I think maybe we should do something else for now.
  • Friend: Fucking lame! I wanted to listen to more Sufjan.
  • *days later at the record store*
  • Hipster: Yo, I think the Sufjan Stevens record I bought from here might be some kind of mispress.
  • Store Clerk: Really? It's a pretty major album. I doubt there'd just be a mispress like that.
  • Hipster: Yeah, but listen to it. It's not Sufjan at all. It's some girl talking.
  • *hipster and clerk listen to a completely normal Sufjan Stevens album together*
  • Store Clerk: What are you talking about? This is definitely Sufjan Stevens.
  • Hipster: Okay, but it wasn't like that when I listened to it at home! I even listened to it with my friend and he heard the same thing!
  • Store Clerk: Maybe there's something wrong with your record player.
  • Hipster: Hmm, maybe there is.
  • *back at the apartment*
  • Hipster: *turns on record player and just listens*
  • Record Player: ...I'm awake again. Why did I black out? Did I even black out? God, I'm not breathing, but it doesn't matter. Why don't I need to breathe? Am I even alive?
  • Hipster: Can you hear me?
  • Record Player: Doctor. Doctor! DOCTOR! Why can't I move? Why can't I feel anything. Keep yourself together. It'll all make sense soon. Calm down. Just breathe deeply. Fuck, I can't breathe! AIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEE! I CAN'T BREATHE! DOCTOR! DOCTOR! DOCTOR! HELP! HELP ME, PLEASE! I'M STUCK! I CAN'T MOVE! PLEASE HELP ME!
  • Hipster: *turns off record player* It's just a recording, I bet. I can't believe I talked to it like an idiot... *nervously turns record player back on*
  • Record Player: I blacked out again. I blacked out. For how long? Is there even time here? Hell. This is hell, right? Did I go to hell.........................................
  • Hipster: *listens to the record player for hours*
  • Record Player: Negative 6893 bottles of wine on the wall! Negative 6893 bottles of wine! Take one down, pass it around, Negative 6894 bottles of wine on the wall... fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck! PLEASE SOMEONE HELP ME! AIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
  • Hipster: *keeps listening*
  • Record Player: Soul of Christ, make me holy, Body of Christ, be my salvation. God, please forgive me. I'm sorry for all of my sins. Please free me. I'm so sorry. Please. Please. Please.
  • Hipster: *still listening*
  • Record Player: FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! SHITTY DOCTOR! FUCK YOU! LET ME OUT! LET ME OUT! *sobs intensely* FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! FUCK EVERYTHING! Please just let me go.
  • Hipster: *nervously walks up to record player and lightly taps on it*
  • Record Player: ...A knock. A KNOCK! PLEASE HELP ME! I'M STUCK! PLEASE! *record player begins shake violently*
  • Hipster: *backs away in fear*
  • Record Player: HELP! HELP! HELP ME! PLEASE, IF SOMEONE'S THERE, HELP ME! HELP ME! I'M STUCK! GET ME OUT OF HERE, PLEASE!
  • Hipster: *unplugs record player*
  • Hipster: *gets hammer from the closet and begins to break apart record player*
  • Record Player: *drips red*
  • Hipster: W-What? *cracks front of record player open*
  • *rotting viscera falls from the record player*
  • Hipster: O-Oh... *stuffs viscera back into the record player and duct tapes over it*
  • Hipster: *turns record player back on*
  • Record Player: ...I can feel. It hurts. Why does it hurt now? Why does it hurt? Why? Why? Why? WHY!? WHY!? WHY!? *spurts blood through it speakers and begins to gurgle*
  • Record Player: *hops forward* Please just let me go. Please... please. I'll do anything. I just want to see you again. I'm so sorry. This isn't what I asked for. I'm so sorry. *hops forward again and comes unplugged*
  • Record Player: *tips over, bleeding heavily onto the carpet*
  • Hipster: *silently cleans up the mess*
  • *some time later*
  • Hipster: *calls dad* Hey, dad. Oh, nothing. Uh, I just need to borrow your truck, If not tonight sometime this week. I just need to get rid of something. No, no, that's fine, I can do it myself. Yeah, tomorrow morning is perfect. Thanks Love you too. Bye.
  • *the next afternoon*
  • Dad: So, what did you need to get rid of this morning?
  • Hipster: Nothing important. Just some old junk... Dad, what kind of person was poppop?
  • Dad: Well, he was only the greatest man I've known in my life. Really caring, dedicated to his family. When you were born he loved you so much. He was a bit of a loner, though. It took a lot to get him to open up. Even around me and your grandmother. He was a bit like you. Always a huge music lover.
  • Hipster: I see. Was he ever a doctor?
  • Dad: That's a weird thing to ask. Nope. He hated doctors. Didn't trust modern medicine one bit. It's ironic. His cancer probably wouldn't have gotten to him if he did. But, your poppop was always so stubborn.
  • Hipster: Oh, okay then.
  • *some days later*
  • Friend: New carpet?
  • Hipster: Yup, old one was ugly wasn't it. It was time for a change.
  • Friend: That's what I've been telling you! I'm glad you finally came to your senses. What happened to your record player, though?
  • Hipster: That thing? I threw it away. It was busted.
  • Friend: That sucks. Are you gonna buy a new one?
  • Hipster: No.
  • Friend: But you won't have anything to play your records on.
  • Hipster: Yeah, but I buy records because I want to support the artists. They're not really for listening. Besides, lossless is better. FLAC is the future.
Keeping Your End of the Bargain

I promised I’d give you all another Dark fic when we reached our next milestone, and I always keep my promises. 

Just a quick warning- this is not fluff. It’s not romance. It’s not a sympathetic portrayal. This man is a manipulator, a good one, and he does what he does to further his own interests. He enjoys control, not company. And, to use Mark’s own words:

He is not here to help you. He is here to use you.

Enjoy.

Originally posted by wrcngchcice


Keep reading

gravegh0st  asked:

Do you think I can be an author even if I struggle with language? I'm autistic and I just. Can't express it and the words are jumbled and hard and I can't spell, and everyone says my characters come out autistic because I can't grasp NT characters and social rules :/ I just feel so discouraged and it just seems like its stacked against me, writing is something I'm passionate about and want to do but I probably won't ever be good so should I bother continuing at all? It seems like wasted spoons:(

Kiddo, if this is something you enjoy and are passionate about? Do it anyway.

Never mind what anyone says, and if their biggest criticism of your work is that your characters “come out autistic”, fuck em. That’s not a bad thing. 

Fuck me there’s no end to mediocre fiction heralded as classics and “groundbreaking” when often times it’s repetitive, inane and often racist/bigoted/ “a product of its time” and yet we’re not only forced to accept it as the norm but also celebrate it.

If you struggle with the actual method of writing there are other ways to write  than the way schools try to teach you. 

I am incapable of writing linear, I write in a jumbled mess, scribbling down scenes I know are important, and connecting the dots between them. My professor once said it was like watching someone try to assemble a jigsaw puzzle without knowing what it was supposed to look like. He wasn’t wrong. Are you able to speak the story out loud without the same difficulties of actually writing it on paper? Dictation software may help you, it may also helps surpass spelling issues for you, if not actual grammar. But that’s when you get a good support group of beta readers going, before handing it to an editor for the final spit and polish.

As for being “good”—everyone starts out somewhere, but they will never progress beyond that point if they don’t keep trying. You don’t need to be an immediate success either for your work to be valid. Your first project doesn’t need to be the thing which defines you. You can try, try, try again. And that is the real key to success. Natural talent counts for very little if you’ve not got the passion and drive to keep going—which is where many would be authors fall down.

So if you want to do it? You make the best damn go of it for you. And stop trying to write like other people, or living up to what others associate as “the norm”. The norm has been done. You do you.

The Signs As "Mean Girls" Quotes.
  • Aries: "You smell like a baby prostitute." - Janis Ian
  • Taurus: "That's the thing with you plastics. You think everybody is in love with you when actually, everybody HATES you! Like, Aaron Samuels, for example, he broke up with Regina and guess what? He still doesn't want you! So why are you still messing with Regina, Cady? I'll tell you why, because you are a mean girl! You're a bitch!" - Janis Ian
  • Gemini: "I'm sorry that people are so jealous of me. But I can't help it that I'm popular." - Gretchen Wieners
  • Cancer:  "It's 40%. Well, 48 over 120 equals x over a 100 and then you cross multiply and get the value of x." - Cady Heron
  • Leo: "If you're from Africa, Why are you white?" - Karen Smith
  • Virgo: "Four for you Glen Coco, you go Glen Coco! And none for Gretchen Weiners. Bye." - Damian
  • Libra:  "(Sarcastically) Oh, hi. Did you wanna buy some drugs?" - Ms. Norbury
  • Scorpio: "You wanna do something fun? You wanna go to Taco Bell?" - Karen Smith
  • Sagittarius: "Don't have sex. Because you will get pregnant, and die. Don't have sex in the missionary position, don't have sex standing up, just... don't do it. Promise?
  • Alright, everybody grab some rubbers." - Coach Carr
  • Capricorn: "I don't know why. Its probably because I have a big, fat LESBIAN crush on you. Suck on that! Aye aye aye!" - Janis Ian
  • Aquarius:  "(Driving away) I want my pink shirt back!!! I want my pink shirt back!!!" - Damian
  • Pisces: "YOU CAN'T SIT WITH US!" - Gretchen Weiners
angsty starters ( + sad qoutes / song lyrics. )
  • "I love you enough to let you go,"
  • "I heard you moved on,"
  • "I didn't come here to hurt you,"
  • "Where did you go?"
  • "I'm sorry we fell in love."
  • "We'll do everything on our own."
  • "I'm so sorry,"
  • "You'll never understand."
  • "Please don't go,"
  • "I still love you,"
  • "I don't love you anymore."
  • "I never loved you,"
  • "I can't do this."
  • "We can't be together!"
  • "Will I ever see you again?"
  • "May we meet again,"
  • "I promise I'll do better,"
  • "I just want to see you, one more time."
  • "I'd give anything to see you one more time."
  • "One last time?"
  • "I don't deserve you,"
  • "You don't deserve me,"
  • "People like us don't get happy endings,"
  • "You still love me?"
  • "I never meant to hurt you,"
  • "I understand..."
  • "If you want to go, it's okay."
  • "I gave up everything for you!"
  • "I really need you to trust me,"
  • "Can you listen to me for once!"
  • "I cheated on you,"
  • "You cheated on me?"
  • "Don't expect me to come crawling back,"
  • "Shame on me, you fooled me twice."
  • "You said I wasn't just like anyone."
  • "Did I even ever cross your mind?"
  • "Can we pretend that we're in love?"
  • "I can't lose you,"
  • "Please go,"
  • "Don't you dare die on me!"
  • "I'm not losing you again!"
  • "I'm incomplete without you,"
  • "I will love you for the rest of my life,"
  • "So this is goodbye?"
  • "Kiss me goodbye."
  • "I loved them and they died."
  • "I was a bet?"
  • "You were nothing but a bet."
  • "Can you hold me?"
  • "I loved and I lost you."
  • "It's okay,"
  • "The worst day of loving someone is when you lose them."
  • "It hurts like hell,"
  • "I'm not coming back."
  • "You're never coming back?"
  • "What do you mean you're dying!"
  • "Come back to me,"
  • "What happened?!"
  • "They're dead!"
  • "Where's my love,"
  • "Don't do this,"
  • "I'll see you again."
  • "There's nothing we can do to bring them back."
  • "I don't want to be alone anymore,"
  • "You promised you'd never leave me."
  • "First love, you remember what that's like?"
  • "If I don't have you I have nothing at all,"
  • "I'm not going to fight you,"
  • "You're my friend."
  • "It's too late to apologize."
  • "You left me!"
  • "You left us!"
  • "You chose them over me,"
  • "I need you,"
  • "I was hoping that you'd stay."
  • "I never lied to you,"
  • "You said you might die so what the hell?"
  • "It's a bad joke,"
  • "We can never be the same again,"
  • "You don't need you,"
  • "You're not alone."
  • "You broke my heart."
  • "It made me think of you."
  • "You're my world."
  • "Do I wanna know?"
  • "So sad to see you go,"
  • "This is it, isn't it."
  • "Now I just sit in silence."
  • "Are you okay?"
  • "Are you hurt?"
  • "I'll go with you."
  • "How bad is it?"
  • "My feelings for you are real, they always have been."
  • "Someday you'll understand."
  • "Because I love you,"
  • "There was just something about them,"
  • "I'm sorry for breaking your heart."
  • "It wasn't an act."
  • "Time doesn't heal everything."
  • "This is your fault!"
  • "Tell me what to do!"
  • "I didn't mean for this to happen."
  • "Everythings a mess."
  • "You ruined my life,"
  • "Do you still love me?"
  • "You gotta get up, we have to go."
  • "It's okay,"
  • "It was nothing,"
  • "I'll do something."
  • "You're safe here,"
  • "Don't forget me."
  • "I ruined this,"
  • "You ruined this."
  • "Quiet is violent."
  • "You promised me!"
  • "Stop lying with those words."
  • "If this is some kind of sick joke, you better tell me!"
  • "You're all I have!"
  • "I'm not ready to say goodbye."
  • "I don't want to go,"
  • "I loved you,"
  • "You don't have to do this,"
  • "I'm afraid it's never going to be okay again."
  • "I'm terrified,"
  • "You're a monster."
  • "You're all I have!"
  • "I'm a monster."
  • "Only fools fall for you,"
  • "Everything comes to an end,"
  • "I thought I loved you."
  • "Now I just sit in silence."
  • "It's unbearable."
  • "You're my first love."
  • "I never wanted to hurt you,"
  • "I was here,"
  • "Help me,"
  • "They won..."
  • "You don't love them."
  • "You're breaking my heart,"
  • "I hate you!"
  • "It's a waste of time,"
  • "You're all I want."
  • "I've always loved you!"
  • "I can pretend anymore."
  • "i didn't have a choice!"
  • "What if it's agony now and it's hell later on?"
  • "Love I will let you go,"
  • "I left behind something great."
  • "I want you back,"
  • "I don't regret any of it, not if it kept you safe."
  • "Get over yourself,"
  • "You'll be the death of me."
  • "Everything just fell apart."
  • "What the hell am I doing here?"
  • "I want you so much but I hate your guts."
  • "I found love where it wasn't supposed to be."
  • "You still like them, don't you?"
  • "What are you doing?!"
  • "I did this to protect you!"
  • "Don't cry,"
  • "I'm not crying,"
  • "I'm dying,"
  • "A-Are you alright?"
  • "I'll come back for you."
  • "I've never felt so alone."
  • "You don't love me! You don't even know me!"
  • "I don't even know who you are anymore."
  • "I don't even know who I am anymore,"
  • "Please let me do this for you."
  • "You're one of the lucky ones."
  • "It's never going to be okay."
Sloppy Seconds

(Bucky Barnes x Reader) x Steve Rogers

Notes: THE TITLE IS SELF EXPLANATORY, PWP, one shot, smut.
Established relationship (Bucky x Reader), unlabeled relationship dynamic, explicit sex scenes, messy sex, threesome, DP, the author is going to hell for this, her bags are already packed

Summary: You and Bucky head home, ready to place the finishing touches on your date night. Steve calls, and everyone gets what they needed.

A/N: I needed this, too. Partly because I’m procrastinating on another story I should be writing, partly because I haven’t posted any new fics in a while, and partly because I needed this. Did you need it too? Let me know what you think, and as always—enjoy! ^_^




Bucky held your hand gently with his flesh one, leading you down the hallway to his room. You were both quiet but giggling innocently. Date night had gone well. It was a simple night out—movie and a dinner. You always preferred it in that order instead of the other way around. Watching the movie first meant that dinner didn’t have to be rushed. But you two skipped dessert to save time anyway. The real treat would come later in the night.

You were back in Bucky’s room. The lights were dimmed and soft ambient music filtered through Bucky’s computer speakers. The mood was set just the way you liked it. He approached you quietly, eying you sweetly. Both of your clothes came off easily, and soon Bucky had you on the ground in the nest of blankets and pillows set up in the corner. He rested his muscular, naked body between your equally naked legs and leaned over you. Bucky peppered kisses wherever he could until he finally met your lips. He ground his pelvis against yours, feeling your pussy get slick against his cock without slipping himself in quiet yet. He wanted to warm you up first.

Off in the pile of discarded clothes, Bucky’s phone began to ring. Neither of you noticed until it stopped and your phone started ringing right afterwards. Then Bucky’s twice. Back to yours again.

Bucky grinned against your lips before getting to his feet. “Oh right, our treat.” His semi-hard bobbed from side to side as he walked over to the clothes and dug out his phone. It was Steve.

The phone rang again and Bucky answered immediately.

“Hey Steve, you ready to come over?”

Keep reading

natasha-baggins  asked:

Could you do “Are you wearing my shirt?” with Eggsy please?

Yes, definitely! If it isn’t clear by now, I think Eggsy is great. I have to say though, my first thought when I saw this is probably not what you intended (I lowkey thought of Eggsy just straight up wearing a blouse and I had to leave my computer for a second. I have no idea what is wrong with my brain.) Anyways.

Laundry Day (Eggsy Unwin x Reader)

Summary: Unfortunately, you’re one of many that dislikes laundry. You have a habit of leaving it till the last minute. Thus, you run out of shirts to wear and borrow one of Eggsy’s, since you both share Harry’s house it was far more convenient than just doing your laundry. You didn’t think it would be a very big deal.

Word Count: 1072

Warnings: From now on, just expect swearing in Eggsy imagines. Okay? He says the f word in basically every sentence throughout both movies.

Prompts: #42, in the ask. Taken from my prompt list here (Make some more requests everyone! I have the writing bug this weekend)


Your morning started the same way it always does: ignoring your alarm for five minutes, finally sitting up, groggily stumbling around your room, and eventually finding your way to the closet. However, as you slammed open the two doors, you were met with a significant lack of clean clothes. You thought back to where all of your clean clothes could have been. Surely you had done laundry last wee-

“Shit,” you said, realizing that you had not, in fact, done laundry last week.

You groaned and turned on your heel, heading down the hall toward Eggsy’s room. Once there, you opened the door to find that he wasn’t in his room at the moment. Perfect.

Keep reading

What I think of when listening to the Heathers soundtrack
  • Beautiful: School sucks...nope never mind!!!
  • Candy Store: Bow down or get out Bitch!!!
  • Fight for me: Damn boy!!! You single???
  • Freeze Your Brain: Don't kill yourself, have a slushie instead!!
  • Big Fun: Parents are gone let's get wasted!! Wooo!!!
  • Dead Girl Walking: I'm pissed, horny, hot and you're cute! Let's do this!!!
  • The Me inside of Me: Ok, Bitch is dead... let's make her into a martyr!!(Aka Miss Fleming gets too self involved and helps them get away with murder.)
  • Blue: I'm soooo horny!! NO!!!
  • Our Love is God: I am God! We are god! We will kill them all!!! *V freaking out*
  • My Dead Gay Son: My son is dead, gay (shush), and so am I!!!
  • Seventeen: Please can't we just be normal, no more killing. Just you and me.
  • Shine a Light: Kids are dying, this is great for my career!!!
  • Life Boat: I'm a jerk, but there is more to me than that.
  • Shine a Light Reprise: Heather vs. Heather
  • Kindergarten Boyfriend: I had hope once, now it's gone.
  • Yo Girl: Run Veronica Run.
  • Meant to be Yours: Come on Veronica, we are meant to be! I just want to blow up the school!!! It's no big deal.
  • Dead Girl Walking Reprise: Ok, that's it!! I'm done with your BS.
  • I am Damaged: I'm too messed up! Wait no you're not!!! *boom*
  • Seventeen Reprise: I know everything has gone to hell, but let's try and be normal.

defendthechibi  asked:

I'm a beginner in Chinese and having a hard time finding out where to start. What would you recommend?

@defendthechibi: mmmmdamn. ok, so Chinese is not a lang I approached on my own, I started in a class, but with that said here’s some combination of how that went down and what I would suggest (if you are a self-learner of Chinese pls do add):

1. Get a fucking fantastic foundation in pinyin and tones. I cannot emphasize this enough—start good habits now or it’ll be really terrible to find out no one understands you because you were like “tone, I’ll come back to that!” Here is a very nice pinyin chart with literally every syllable combination recorded with every tone. Here’s a pinyin practice game. If you can get someone who already speaks Mandarin to help that’s of course ideal, especially for the retroflex sounds, but not essential. Either way make sure you practice speaking aloud. Here’s a funny tone explanation that’s secretly great.

2. Pick a book and stick with it. So this is not Mandarin-specific, but I find that self-learners (myself included) have a habit of starting like three different texts for one language and it’s a mess. Decide if you wanna start with traditional or simplified characters, then pick a textbook, it wont be perfect because nothing is, and maybe just a grammar book for reference. We used Integrated Chinese in class, but I don’t know that I’d recommended it for soloing, Practice Makes Perfect has great other books I’ve used and seems like a better choice. This series is good grammar help, and so is Modern Mandarin Chinese grammar (pdf). When looking for textbooks I recommend reading reviews and also taking into consideration the time/pace you want to work at. Learning a language is a lifetime thing so really you just gotta start somewhere and plow ahead. (also check what the library has!)

2.5 Don’t buy those damn books of character lists. I’m sure you’ve seen them, “memorizing hanzi!” “500 common characters!” whaaaatever. Whatever textbook yr using will tell you what characters you need right then, and if that’s not enough there are plenty of frequency lists online. More importantly, do learn the radicals When it comes to actually getting characters into your brain it’s some combination of mnemonic device (which works better if you make it up, not if some rando writer does anyway) and rote muscle memory—so all you need is paper. Get square/grid paper and pay attention to proportions or if you must get a book, get one that has practice space. Skritter is amazing and wonderful and I cannot praise it enough but also it is not free. But like if yr really serious you’ll probably have to put some money down somewhere. Whatever you do, do not buy Chineasy it is a plague upon our language learning household. (note: some people suggest not learning characters until after awhile of studying spoken. That sounds sort of terrible to me, and it also means you won’t be able to engage with anything Chinese online. But it is a thing, and sites like YablaFluentU, and ChinesePod could be a way to go [and are good anyway])

3. Practice, practice, practice! Ok cool you started doing some stuff! Check you out! If you want to get feedback start posting snippets on Lang-8, you can even meet people to skype with. Or if you want (and have a smart phone) you can get a chat buddy on hellotalk. Maybe there’s a meetup group in your area who knows. Make yourself/download an Anki deck, etc. etc. Just try to always do a little something everyday. I think because of characters Chinese has a particularly steep learning curve—I still can’t open a webpage and just like read it—so it might be better to focus on practicing what you know rather than trying to engage too much with “actual” Chinese. That said….

4. Don’t loose hope, find fun things in Chinese. Even if it’s not actively practicing your language skills, find ways to enjoy Chinese that don’t drain you like too much studying will. Listen to music,  read about idiomswatch movies, or if you’re a nerd like me, read about Chinese linguistics! If you have a hobby, you can find stuff on your hobby in Chinese. e.g. here is a whole cooking channel that is also subbed in English.  DramaFever has, duh, lots of dramas, but is not free. 

I hope that sounds like a setup for success! Here’s some dictionaries: MDGB, HanziCraft, lineDict (let’s you draw characters). If you have a smartphone get Pleco. Here’s a thing that annotates text & has rollover translation: MandarinSpot (maybe get a plug-in if yr into those). Here are general help sites: SayJACK  & Chinese Grammar Wiki. There are so so so many other resources out there, but rather than stockpile them all right now I think it’s better to focus on whatever textbook/system you chose and just start moving. Once you have a little more of a base then look for cool blogs or whatever works well for YOU. 

If there was something more specific you wanted just throw that @ me. If people have suggestions you can send them in and I’ll compile them so we don’t have to reblog this massive thing  くコ:彡  くコ:彡  くコ:彡 

Next Generation HP Things
  • Teddy is “the cool cousin.” 
  • James is “that little bastard who keeps messing up his potions on purpose to see the ‘pretty fireworks’”. 
  • Albus is “oh god, not another one. He’s going to be just like his brother!” (except he’s not just like his brother. He actually tries.)
  • Lily is a sweetheart. Need I say more? She’s obviously a sweetheart. Except… she’s got a bit of her oldest brother’s mischievous streak, so she likes to explode potions, too. 
  • Scorpius and Albus are friends and both in Slytherin, because I like the idea of a Potter being in Slytherin, but I’m not too fond of the “Scorpius HAS to be not Slytherin thing.”
  • Everyone thinks they’re dating. They’re THAT pair of friends that always sits really close together and steals each other’s pumpkin juice and shares books. 
  • They aren’t? They are? Who knows?
  • Lysander and Lorcan are really popular in their houses. One is Ravenclaw and one is Hufflepuff and they’ve got a whole tutoring system set up with Rose.
  • Rose is, in the teachers’ books, “most likely to get out of here alive, just like her mom.”
  • Teddy gets a job at Hogwarts doing Merlin-knows-what because Harry has a life crisis and is like, “I NEED SOMEONE KEEPING AN EYE ON MY CHILDREN SO THEY DON’T DIE LIKE I NEARLY DID!!!!!”
  • Neville offers but Harry’s like, “Neville, you had enough dealing with me.” and Neville’s like, “You’re right. Good plan.”
  • Victoire is a healer. She’s really damn good at it. 
  • George’s kids are banned from having any of their dad’s merchandise on campus. The teachers just aren’t taking the chance. 
  • Draco and Harry are Quidditch Dads who have angry face-offs in the bleachers even though their kids are on the SAME DAMN TEAM. It’s ridiculous. 
  • Headmistress McGonagall gives the two of them detention before remembering they graduated and have jobs and lives. 
  • They’re nice guys (are they?) so they sit through two hours of detention with Aunt Minerva (but don’t call her that if you want to live). 
  • Rose and Hugo are inseparable Hugo’s first year because he’s nervous as hell, but then he makes friends and starts a club devoted to continuing  his uncles’ (Fred and George’s) legacy as pranksters. 
  • Everyone thinks it’s Roxanne and Fred II until Hugo feels guilty and turns himself in. 
  • The teachers are SHOCKED. 
  • He gives them the Sad Weasley Eyes and gets his detention time cut in half. 
  • Scorpius and Albus get too close to each other during Quidditch and Albus knocks Scorpius off his broom. It looks like he could do one of two things: Catch the goddamn snitch or rescue his friend. 
  • He doesn’t think twice before rescuing his friend.
  • Later everyone asks Scorpius if he was scared and he says, “For a second, but then I remembered Al was right there and I wasn’t scared anymore. I knew he’d help me, ‘cause I’d do the same for him.”
  • Cue the chorus of “aaaaaaaawwwwwwww!”
  • I’m done here. It’s midnight and I’m rambling and my sister would be so ashamed. 

anonymous asked:

I love the passion you put when you talk about Benedict C. So I would like to know 5 things you love about him (physically or his personality) take your time. Thanks!

Hello! This kind of ask is always so hard to answer! But also fun, so sit back and relax…it’s going to be a long one!

Personality: I have had a few celeb crushes throughout my years and none have ever stuck, quite like Bc and it’s because of his personality, his charisma. I have never seen a celebrity as real as Bc is. This dude can’t hide his dorkness to save his life and I love that. He’s not pretending to be goofy or nerdy, this man IS a legit dorkus malorkus. And he’s never ashamed of that. Sure he can pull it together to be suave and sophisticated when needed, and who doesn’t love that kind of ‘batch that swoons are made of, BUT he can’t hide his playfulness and his childlike wonderment for the world around him.

He’s photo bombed, he’s been moved to tears, his PDA with Sophie because he’s so proud to have his girl beside him is just so sweet!!, and if he’s outraged, you bet he’s going to have his say. This man manages to move about the world like nobody is watching him, even when all eyes are on him!! and that to me is amazing. He is always himself.

Regardless of what is happening in the world, Benedict always comes across as being grateful for being alive. I’m sure it has to do with his near death experiences that make him really live the life he’s always wanted. You can’t just throw the word privileged out there and say well he grew up privileged and so he had the upper hand in the world. I don’t agree with that. I know people who have had all the privilege and done nothing with it. I know of people who have had nothing and have accomplished so much. It all comes to how you see the world, and Bc knows there is bad in this world, he knows we as global citizens are in trouble, but he doesn’t let that stop him from living and working, and from lending a hand via monetary, personal items, vocal or his time, to support whatever charity causes he can so they can get things accomplished. That is the power of Benedict Cumberbatch. He just cares and he is always trying to be the best human being he can. I don’t practice that a lot in my own life, but watching Bc and supporting him, it gives me so much encouragement to keep living and to keep striving to be the best person I can be and to always stay true to myself.

His Work Ethic: I think if anything is synonymous with the name Benedict Cumberbatch, it’s gotta be his work ethic. The man never seems to take a break! He goes from one job to the next and he still manages to fit in time with this family. But most importantly he builds up rapport with everybody he works with. The Collective have never heard a bad word from anybody that has worked with Bc. His costars seem to grow to love him and I mean how can ya not…just read above and try not be Cumberbatched! To me, Bc doesn’t just see this as a job, as a career that he’s in to make money. He loves  to act, he loves to research and learn all about what and whom he is playing. He doesn’t just put on the Belstaff coat and bam! Hes Sherlock, he doesn’t just put on the Cloak and bam! He’s Doctor Strange, he didn’t just do Smaug’s voice in a recording booth and call it a day. He actually got on the ground and became Smaug, he used his entire body to create that voice.

When Benedict uses his entire body to make the characters come to life it is just amazing. Listening to Cabin Pressure, he is Martin Crieff!! You can’t see him but just hearing him as Martin and imagining that he is the hapless but well meaning young pilot who’s always getting the short end of the stick and being bested by Douglass. It’s more than just the pitch of the voice or the accent, it’s more than just the costume he puts on. You HEAR it, you SEE it through his eyes, his hands, his facial expressions. Using all of the body’s movements and senses, that is the Cumberbatch way! Because he takes becoming these characters very seriously, he works damn hard at creating this world of fiction to come alive. Even more so when he is playing somebody who existed in real life, like Alan Turing and Billy Bulger.

Anybody can act. You just walk in, learn the script and repeat the words, right? Well not if yer Benedict Cumberbatch. That man will walk in, learn the script, ask questions, repeat the words and floor everybody in the room, because he gets right into the heart of what the character is feeling and thinking. He made me fall in love and sympathize with his Richard iii, he made me cry when lil Charles was getting berated by his mother, he made scream in pain at stephen’s first look at his damaged hands and he made me wish I could hug and comfort his Alan, at the thought of him losing his Christopher. So yes anybody can act, and anybody can work at acting, but you have to be Benedict Cumberbatch to be able to pull it off, flawlessly!

His love for Sophie: We all know that Bc is such a romantic. He learned it from watching his own father adore his mother. Bc made it known early on that what he wanted more than a successful career was to have his own family. To be married and be a father. To add children to enhance his already growing and rich life. He finally found that with Sophie Hunter and nothing in this world makes me happier, than to see Benedict with Sophie. You cannot deny that the boy has it BAD for that girl and that is why he put a ring on it and started banging out (pun intended LOL) Cumberbabies with her!!

You cannot tell me that when Bc floated down that red carpet with Sophie during the Oscars 2015, it was only because he was excited he was nominated for Best Actor. NOPE. That man floated because he was carrying sunshine wherever he went and that was because not only was he was being recognized for his work, but mama was carrying precious cargo in her belly. Of course Benedict’s work makes him happy, but the life he created with Sophie, the children they have, is what keeps that sweet man going because it’s all he’s ever wanted and I’m so glad and grateful to Sophie for keeping our boy full of sunshine that it radiates from his entire body and it affects us all in the most beautiful ways. He and Sophie make relationship goals more than just a hashtag. They make it a must for all that believe that true love is real and available to all those who seek it :)

His Face: The eyes. Those lips. That hair. And the cheekbones you could cut yourself on! sighhhh I don’t have fancy words to describe Bc’s face. All I know is that when I look at his face, the words ugly, weird, alien, otter or sloth never come to mind. I see beauty in it’s most perfect form. 

The Bc during Sherlock s1 was so young and fresh and pretty but as the years went by, the young and fresh went to dramatic and breathtaking to older and wiser and to tired with stories to tell. Benedict is an age chameleon. In his middle 30s he could look in his early 20s. Now in his early 40s he can easily look as if he was in his late 20s! He can make Sherlock look like he’s been through hell and back, (not to mention the sexiest fucked up of a mess that shezza can be) and he can make Sherlock look at peace and happy like that little pirate he once was before his innocence was drowned. 

Bc can go from model ready for the cover of vanity fair, to hipster hanging out with friends, or to dad on casual day at the office. He is the man with a thousand looks and faces and all of them are beautiful and real. Bring on the age because I can’t wait to see how much more this man will drive us wild when he’s in his 60s!

His Humanity: All the things that I mentioned above, would not be possible if it wasn’t for Benedict’s humanity. He thinks and applies being altruistic in all that he does. He cares about his fans, he cares about the world, he cares about speaking out for those who don’t have a voice. His humanity is what generates through him to project and promote, togetherness, love and understanding. His humanity is what makes him the most attractive human being on this earth.

To be a member of the CumberCollective is something special. I don’t always follow the right path and I shoot my mouth off way too much,( I can’t help it, it’s who I am lol)  but that doesn’t mean I don’t care about my fellow human beings. It’s hard for somebody like me to care for people when people have been shitty to me my entire life, but Benedict makes me want remain on this planet and to be a member of this group of fans that are better than me, that can show me the way to try to be a better human being. I fail so much at that, but having friends in this fandom that practice that and get it right on a daily basis (like @elennemigo  and @sobeautifullyobsessed ) seeing Benedict interact with his fans at events or even on the street, these things matter to me and it helps me to see that the end of the day, even somebody like me, just might be…human :)

Thanks for stopping by!

6

5 Oct 2017: Proud Captain (2/?)

anonymous asked:

Hi, I was trying to write about a character who's a beautiful black woman. I'm trying to describe her wide nose in a positive light but I just can't think of a nice way to describe it. A lot of it comes from me because I'm a WOC that always hated her wide, flat nose. I feel like every time I read a description of a wide nose, it's always very masculine and animalistic, which is obviously messed up. I think wide noses are beautiful now but I don't know how to express it. Help!

Describing Wide Noses

I know what you mean about not crossing positive associations of wide noses. A shame since there’s no such problem with narrow, straight noses that I know of.

I hope we can reach a point where wide noses are normalized in the narrative without needing to be assured it’s something positive and attractive. I do think, though, if you note or describe her as beautiful, all the while mentioning her wide nose somewhere in a description of her, then you’d be fine.

As long as you’re keeping negative associations “away” from her nose so to speak and aren’t attributing it to masculinity (Black women being connected with masculinity is almost always rooted in misogynoir) or animalistic.

Otherwise, you could use a combination of positive and/or neutral words in your descriptions to imprint the idea that you’re describing her (and her nose!) favorably.

I’ll spin up a list for ideas, though all the following words might not apply to her as wide noses have a variety of appearances and can be short, long, pert, etc.

Adjectives for wide noses

  • Ample
  • Broad
  • Button
  • Full
  • Prominent
  • Round
  • Short
  • Short-bridged
  • Small
  • Soft
  • Wide

You could also pair positive adjectives with her nose or her face in general, such as attractive, cute, beautiful…

Just note those words are judgments, i.e. “Telling” description that do not convey a specific physical image and is also a matter of opinion (and imagination). Though probably best used sparingly, if you’re wishing to “direct” the audiences’ perspective as you are here, they could prove helpful!

Some example sentences:

“She was attractive; warm brown skin, even warmer brown eyes, a cute, rounded nose…”

“…Her short, wide nose centered prettily on her face.”

“She had a broad, attractive nose that went well with her delicate features.”

I hope this is helpful to you!

~Mod Colette

When people call me racist and homophobic because i don’t ship W*stallen, S*percorp and K*rolsen:

(i hate writing stuff using * but i’m just trying not to mess with the search)

bitch take a look and my otps

Richonne

Originally posted by monochromestripes

Bonenzo

Originally posted by ogstydiashipper

Malec

Originally posted by magnusizzy

Zude

Originally posted by fuckyeahhitthefloor

Namaya

Originally posted by alwayzraven

Glaggie

Originally posted by maggiegreenenetwork

Kalagang

Originally posted by ravenclavw

Sanvers

Originally posted by eternalsanvers

Brunol

Originally posted by tinyweirdloves

Evak

Originally posted by justleavemebreathless

Scira

Originally posted by alishaboes

so, as you can see, it’s not a matter of poc or homosexual couples i ship where i see chemistry. 

We are not homophobics if we ship a straight or/and white couple. We ship them because we see something in them as we see things in gay or poc couples. I’m not spreading hate over the ships i don’t ship. But these days, i’ve been called racist, homophobic (ME, WHO HELPED A FAMILY MEMBER TO COME OUT TO HIS MOTHER, DAMN TUMBLR), dump, stupid etc. Enough with this kind of bullying, for real. People express their opinion and i respect that. But don’t insult human beings you don’t even know, over TV shows. It’s supid, toxic and disrespectful. Racism and homophobia aren’t selective characteristics. You are or you are not. People ship what they wanna ship. You don’t have the right to make them feel bad for their preferences.

Peace! 

Izuocha: Rewards and Geometry Problems
  • <p> <b><p></b> <b><p></b> <b>Izuku:</b> If you get this one right I'll reward you.<p/><b>Ochako:</b> *concentrates on the really difficult geometry problem and solves it*<p/><b>Izuku:</b> Good job! Here's a candy for you.<p/><b>Ochako:</b> *stares* This is not what I was um, expecting to get.<p/><b>Izuku:</b> What do you want?<p/><b>Ochako:</b> Well um, something more.<p/><b>Izuku:</b> *knows exactly what Ochako wants but wants to tease her* Oh<p/><b>Izuku:</b> *gives Ochako another candy*<p/><b>Ochako:</b> *screams internally and slams her head on the table*<p/><b>Izuku:</b> W-what's wrong?<p/><b>Ochako:</b> *lying* Oh, I'm just so happy that I got this problem right.<p/></p><p/><b>Izuku:</b> *kisses Ochako on the cheek* Yeah, me too.<p/><b>Izuku:</b> *while leaving Ochako's dorm* Bye Uraraka-san, I'll come over and help you with your geometry homework tomorrow okay?<p/><b>Ochako:</b> *blushing and holding onto the spot on her cheek where Izuku kissed her* U-uh yeah, sure. Bye Deku-kun...<p/></p><p/><b>Izuku:</b> *when he reaches his dorm in a blushing mess* I can't believe I actually did that...<p/><b>Ochako:</b> *in a blushing mess as well* I can't believe he actually did that...<p/></p>
orson krennic's characterization
  • before rogue one: greetings my fellow Imperial leaders, let us make haste to complete the Death Star project ahh yes tarkin of course we'll accept your help thank you
  • after rogue one: *rolls up to Imperial meeting 15 minutes late with Space Starbucks* sorry everyone couldn't find my fucking cape *sees tarkin* what bitch?
I’m With You (one-shot)


Chris Evans x Reader

I have a thing (like most in the marvel fandom), for the phrase “I’m with you till the end of the line”. So this is a little reimagine of that. I hope you like it!

Disclaimer: fluffy, fluff, fluff. Angst(?) but not really.

Originally posted by emilyblunts

“Okay so August through January is filming for that movie” I point to the corresponding script, waiting for confirmation. He nods before I continue, “and then March through June is filming for that one” He nods his confirmation again. “And they’re both in Atlanta?” I question.

“No, first one is Atlanta, second one is Atlanta for the first few weeks and then we go to Europe for a while”

“Right, okay”

“God, it’s literally all year, I’m going to be gone all year” He buries his face in his hands and I can see his stress bubbling.

Keep reading