i'll be the wings that keep your hearts in the clouds

Aries: I envy you. I envy your courage, your stupidity and your childishness. Maybe you’re asking “Why?” Well, wouldn’t it be beautiful if we were all children at heart, like you? Like seeing things so horrible yet still making corny jokes? Like telling your feelings, like running until your feet hurt? Like purity, like innocence mixed with knowledge? You have experienced the world, you have experienced life. And yet, you still stand here. Brave and tall. As if to say “I am not afraid of life. I am not afraid to live.”

Taurus: I will always associate you with flowers and colours. With lilies and roses and blood oranges. I will always associate you with fruit and red-green-yellow. We will speak in colours, talk in words others won’t understand. With red-pink sand and blue-green eyes. An encouraging nod, a hug with clasping hands. Words left unspoken simply ‘cause they were never meant to be said, they were meant to be. They were meant to be. Plucking petals like a grade schooler playing games about love. Holding a magnifying glass over your head, and I could not find a flaw. I just saw you. I saw you.

Gemini: While you drink in the melodies of everyone’s laughter the ghosts find a new home inside your body. A facade of performance, masking out your true emotions. While the hallways turn vacant and your ghosts shut the doors. The voices leave the room empty, the emptiness in your chest weighing like a brick worth thousands of diamonds. I cannot put a price on your heart, I don’t know its colours. I don’t know its voice. Or the three albums you have on repeat over the summer, or the songs you dance to at night. Simply because you are you, unique, mysterious and beautiful.

Cancer: You are a puzzle and I am not your missing peace, I don’t own it. But you do. You make up your own being. Maybe you left it in your back pocket, next to the shattered dreams or under the pillars you build when you were eight years old. The ones you made to put your broken home on, searching for stability in broken mirrors. I will linger in my map of you and I swear that even when I get back it leads back to you. It always leads back to you. To that little house with orange paint on the walls from ten years ago. With the nicotine sticking to a once white ceiling and some kind of animals running around. The dusty photographs will still stand on the desk. You will still sit on that one spot, with teary eyes and crossed legs. And you will still be beautiful.

Leo: I could never describe your beauty. Your beauty cannot be multiplied, it can only be remembered, treasured, envied, appreciated or regretted. And by remembered I mean that when you feel like you are just another extra in someone’s life that they will mention you to their parents during dinner. They will talk about your shining personality and sparkling eyes. By treasured I am talking about that “the one” experience which you deserve. A treasure filled with all things unique and irreplaceable. One that’s filled with happiness. By envied I am talking about the eyes you do not see, or do not wish to see. Or don’t notice. You stand out in a crowd, especially when you don’t think you are. By appreciated I am talking about the ones who see your true you, your tangled hair and cracked lips. The ones who still stay even through the bad times. By regretted I am talking about the people who did not see your beauty until you blossomed. I understand why you find cocoons beautiful now, and how you like caterpillars just as much as butterflies.

Virgo: Snow litters on untouched skin. Sun rains through the cracks of the darkness even where you hide. I could hear you talking every day. Forever. With delicate fingers and blushed cheeks. Your hair untamed and your fingers bruised to the bone. Delicately logical. The edges of the leafs of oak trees remind me of your way of thinking. The overhang reminds me of your mind. Which casts shadows over the villagers in the houses you build where colourless souls reside. You are so often in debate with your own head, at war with your own body. Never at peace, always restless. Always asking, “but why?” I don’t know. You like it, don’t you? Parading around in your own world? Sweet little soul in a world full of pain.

Libra: The bell of the church echoed through your head a little longer than it should’ve. It never was nice. We never played nice. We talked until our lips were dry and I stayed home when you were out cold. But memories don’t matter anymore do they darling? In this orchestra of harmonious noises where you are the leader of everything nothing can hurt you. I don’t know, I don’t know. And goddamnit I know you will try to push everything on yourself again. You always do. That’s just how you work. Why don’t you warm your hands on your own body for once? You don’t need another person to feel like you’re loved, you only need one. One whole, full, true person.

Scorpio: Everything seems darker these days. Charcoal coloured clouds are a daily thing. And your arms are always covered up along with your legs. Even in the summer the nights don’t seem as enchanting. Not when small bruises shaped like the bumps of your knuckles litter on your thighs. Self destructive lullabies, “I just need a friend, for once in my life.” A desire for someone to stay ripped from your lips. So I stayed by your side wondering, if you wanted me to stay or needed me to stay. Of course I could say you remind me of scarlet blood and bathroom tiles. But you also remind of the river I used to play in when I was nine. You also remind me of the necklace I got when my grandmother passed away. You remind me of memories, the good, the bad, the in-between. You remind me of life. Please keep on living.

Sagittarius: The reason that I didn’t cry when you left was because crying means letting go, or so you said. And I don’t want to let you go. I want you to be a part of me, forever. But I can’t do that, you would rot in the hell hole that is my mind. I can’t put you through more cruelty. I hate how I am the reason you cry on bad nights, do you still wonder if I miss you? I do. I do. I do. Regret was stronger than appreciation. But you’re so fucking strong. Your eyes still shine even when you’re sad. You think no one likes you yet you know that’s not true. You’re the reason I am alive. You let me experience pain, beauty, emotion. You let me live. You’re so much more than enough, sometimes I can’t even handle who you are. You are dazzling. But you could never control your heart, it always wandered over the streets of other people’s bodies.

Capricorn: When the sun sets over mountains and the houses made of glass shatter I will still see your name in the sky in neon lights. The little bugs in our home always wanted to be friends with you. They always sat on the tip of your nose with gentle smiles. I never envied you, I wish I treasured you. You are so simplistic and nice. Nice. Too underrated for your own good, no? Aren’t we all. Your hands will still be remembered by those you touched. You always leave some kind of mark that they don’t want to wash off. You have that affect on people. You make them drown their thoughts and hold their breath when you walk into a room. You are an old soul, but you know that. Why? You just do. Because you’re you. And nothing can change that or the late nights, the slowness or the fastness in your walk doesn’t matter for the right people. They will walk for you until they have blathers on their toes. If they don’t you know what to do.

Aquarius: Swirls of icy wind are always your accomplice. You’re cold, and beautiful; like snow. The wires always stick to your senses, they get stuck in between your backbone. They twist around your spine and plug into the back of your brain. You let other people control you like you’re a mindless puppet. I think the wires got the best of you. Whenever you speak your mind it says something beautiful and unique. You are original, not ordinary. I am sorry they teach you that being unique is bad and that you have to fit into this ‘ordinary’ world as an ‘ordinary’ person. Nothing is ordinary about you, not even your name. Your name says who you are as a person, if someone asks me to define you I will simply say your name, the definition of your personality is your name. Because your name is unique and so is your personality. Don’t let other people control you.

Pisces: The imaginary butterflies with the raven black wings told me about you. They tell me that your head is in a universe they have never seen, with all things beautiful and all things bad. They see you crying with your knees tugged up sometimes, hands in your hair as you hide beneath sheets of darkness. You write poetry with the blood in the sink and make galaxies with the stars you find inside other people their eyes. A gentle smile always embraces your lips, “So happy, yet so sad” they say. A mask is something you believe is beautiful, but I believe you are beautiful. The real you. Not the you who cautiously walks over this realm of sadness. Your moonlit hair is so silky, your sunlit eyes are so sad. Chin up little soldier.

—  Letters to the zodiac signs

“Captain, the sail!”

Victor snapped around and swore when he saw it. The edge of the storm sail thrashed viciously, the line tethering it snapped. “Hold her steady!” The sky raged above, near black with the swirling of hurricane clouds.

Wood strained beneath his feet. Victor clutched onto the starboard railing as he staggered his way down the deck, keeping low as the ship lurched forward. The icy spray of the sea showered over him, stinging at his eyes and biting his skin.

As the ship dropped with crash of the wave beneath, Victor leapt across, seizing onto the rope whipping in the harsh storm winds. The muscles in his arms screamed as he fought the power of the elements, rope burning his palms as he heaved himself up, quickly rethreading the sail. A moment later and one of the deckhands slammed against his side, yelling as he grabbed at the rope to help secure it.

The swell of the waves rose over the height of their masts, but the wind caught the storm sail, sending them over before it crested.

All around them, the ocean stormed, rain cutting like daggers across his skin. Behind the helm, Victor could see Georgi attempting to keep the ship steady, driving them over the top of the waves. They climbed slow and dropped fast, at the mercy of the sea’s violent temper.

Victor heard the thunder before he could attempt to maneuver back to the wheel. The dark sky was void of the flash of lightening, but the thunder kept sounding, booming over the bow of the ship. It struck straight through his chest, the vibrations clamoring through his ribcage and Victor knew what it was before he saw them.


His warning was mute against roar of the storm, the thunder of their wings. The wind filling the sails went still, the ship’s momentum ceasing. A wave crashed against them the same moment that they descended, piercing through the black of the storm clouds. A murder of harpies, circling the ship like the swirl of the hurricane.

Their screeches flooded the ship, ear-splitting. Half-human, half-birds, and unlike the allure born by sirens, they were repulsive. Legs of a vulture, arms absent for wings. The stench of their feathers fouled the air, warning of the death they brought with them.

The first struck his shoulder and sent him reeling, falling fast to the deck. Victor rolled before it could grab him, its claws smashing into the wood beside his head. His pistol was drawn and fired into its chest without aim, harpy’s harsh shriek exploding with a spray of feathers and blood.

The second seized onto his arm, bared teeth flashing in his eyes in the moment before he ducked his head. The knife strapped on the inside of his boot was in his palm as its nails sunk into his flesh, the sea-soaked fabric of his clothing staining red. Victor yelled as he sliced through its claw, pitching forward to slam the creature against mast rigging, sword driven through its heart.

At the helm, he glimpsed Georgi firing on more, one arm attempting to keep the ship steady from the pounding of the waves. At the stern, a harpy hurled one of his crewmen off the side of the ship, body limp like a rag and lost to the sea. Victor shouted, the second pistol off his sash useless as the shot missed, hardly clipping a bloodied wing.

The harpy’s angry screech ripped at his ears, its force making him stumble. Another wave sent him off balance, tripping into the grip of the harpy swooping in.

Victor threw up his arms to protect himself, but he never collided with it. Right before his eyes, the harpy’s face twisted with a scream, spine arching as Yuuri tore the wings off its back. The siren’s eyes were as red as the splash of blood coating his claws, dripping as he tossed the harpy aside.

Yuuri’s wings were full and bold, spread grand in battle. His skin was stained near completely black, feathers bristling from his arms and legs.

Three more harpies fell to his hands as easily as if they had been gulls, others fleeing when they glimpsed the siren. Yuuri’s wings cut through the air, through the harpies still spiraling above the ship, before his voice pierced through the deafening roar of the storm.

Time itself seemed to stand still, the wind dead, waves calmed until the moment in which Yuuri’s cry disbursed. Fierce faces contoured, the harpies’ eyes settled on the siren as the thunderous beat of the wings bore down.

Yuuri spoke no command, spreading his wingspan over the center of the ship. The harpies scattered.

Then the sea slammed against the ship and Yuuri’s arm wrapped around Victor before he could be thrown into it, holding him tight to the siren’s side as he flew. Victor buried himself into Yuuri and the silk of feathers all around him.

Yuuri set Victor back behind the helm, wings encircling him in a brief embrace. Victor did not miss the brush of Yuuri’s hand through his hair, lips catching against the side of his face. The siren was gone again in the second that followed, leaving Victor to fight the fading of the storm with two words whispered sweet to his captain.

“Safe stay.”

You once said that a step towards recovery means I’ll need to break myself into pieces, darling I’ve been trying to put my heart back together. I like to step on myself sometimes, I don’t take compliments well because I don’t think too highly of myself. When you step on the same lego piece everyday even your ego starts to melt a little. You once said that if I find someone to hold my thoughts before I hold their heart– then maybe she’s the one. Or maybe there’s no one out there, who knows, right? We can circle around this a little longer than always, but I’ll always run back to the why. Why do I want to conquer my memories? Each city that I’ve built for them inside of my head is still bright and I’ve not let a single light bulb blow out, I’m so out of it– while thoughtlessly I’ve been reaching out of my head, my heart likes to beat me to it. It says that love can only be achieved if I chase after it. You once said that I shouldn’t be so hard on myself. Do you still believe in those words? Because if I’m not cruel to myself, I could be cruel to someone else. If I read enough books, do you think I’d finally own a chapter in my own life? If I open up some more, will I close off opportunities for myself to the prospect of loving myself? And what about them? Vanity is my master and I’m a slave. It’s okay to be a little vain sometimes, right? I’ve got it in my veins, maybe I’m the only honest one. You once said that if I trip over the same rock and stub my toe a million times within a week, you’d still say it’s okay. Like falling requires gravity to bend to my whispers. Like drowning demands my lies to swim back to shore. Like dying seeps through my eyes, how can I love if all I’ve got is missing pieces? You once said that a river flows like time and if I’m out of seconds– you’ll just record your voice saying I love you until I finally get it. I remember everything that love has to offer, but never the person. I remember the feeling of infection that is affection. And if I walk alone and get hit by a car, maybe it’s just another story that I won’t write. Some words live in between the lines, I’ve been seeing dualities. Life and death is just a kiss and hug. Black and white, storms and clouds are just pears and apples. Poetry and prose likes to sound sweet, but it’s the bitter bits of me that’s suicidal. Love and hate was born from strangers, so you never knew the difference between the moon and the sun– the lightness of tomorrow likes to coat the darkness of past days. Cigarettes and lung cancer, a dance of smoke that disguises itself as stress free, do you think I’ll die healthy? Drugs and my body, which one will make me feel better if I’ve been sweating for a week? You once said that we’re spinning around in a circle just waiting for someone to stop by– grab my attention and you can have my voice, steal from my hands and you can have my poems, which hurts more to have loved or to not have loved at all? An empty silence that’s so full of itself– I can’t hear myself think inside of my own head. I’ve got file cabinets tagged under read later, but I’m a sucker for love– so I feed into it. You once said if the sky breaks into a brighter day, you’ll be there. That is wishful thinking, my favorite kind. Words can’t give meaning to our story, but we still write. You once said that it has to mean something. Every statement paused long enough for several lifetimes to become real again. It feels like such a long time, but we’re still in love with them in there somewhere. It’s buried. It’s in a coffin, but it’s there and we know it. We can hear it. We can hear it. Fuck, we can hear it. That little beating that isn’t ours, it’s always theirs. And that’s my fear, you once said that maybe that’s my fate– I’m supposed to cling onto that strand of innocence, of who I used to be, to remember what it feels like to feel, it has to mean something. Giving meaning to nothing, my favorite pastime. Giving something to someone, the only way that I’ve been living. You once said that until I learn to keep more for myself, I’ll always end up in square one– alone, but as long as I’ve got you, it’s not true, right? Some thoughts like to sleep alone, that’s not one of them. Hold onto that piece of us, the poetic storm that is joy. Keep your kindness to a burn, a stretched out sunrise screaming your name is my simmer. I know about nothing and that’s my one redeeming quality. I know that I don’t know shit, and that’s why I write like this. I know that I don’t love like I used to, and that’s why I love like this. I know that I’m not the same person from last year, and that’s why my guilt likes to trip up. I know that I’m no longer in love with her, but I can’t seem to explain the empty feeling unless I spell her name backwards under a star somewhere that I can’t touch. I know that I’m still messed up, but I’m just taking advantage of my youth. You once said some people will get over you in a week, but it’ll take you a lifetime to get over someone. If forever is a drug then I’ve overdosed. If always is a lie then I’ll take the beautiful. If never is more and a secret is sore– then I’m sorry about the words that didn’t stop, I am trying. I am always trying. You once said that if we kiss the ocean long enough, the mountains will answer. I’ve buried my love letters on the highest mountain and emptied my heart into my art. If I live long enough to spread my wings, do you think I’d still be condemned? Life is too short to live in the past, but I can’t stop asking about my what ifs. Love is too long to just be over, but I’ll just keep painting over it with a new layer of red. If you’re still reading, then I’m still writing. This yin and yang battle of ours has no meaning. Tortured souls live in the canvas and I’ve seen enough chains– I shall be unbound someday. You once said I love you– darling, that’s the only fucking truth that I believe in. You once said that soulmates aren’t always lovers– I guess it’s just you. You once said that flowers don’t just bloom, they wilt– so I guess I’m just withered. You once said that if you had your way, I’d own the universe. You don’t get it. When you became my best friend, I got it.
—  You once said

You be the Anchor that Keeps my Feet on the Ground, I’ll be the Wings that Keep Your Heart in the Clouds: I’ve always thought of this title as a negative-positive title (Anchor-bad Wings-good), but is it really that? I was looking at this title and realized, you’ll be the anchor that keeps my feet on the ground, sturdy, in place, where nothing can shake it or move it. This is a song about faith and love, and i’ve realized that this title is not a parasitic relation, it is symbiotic.

Light Your Heart Up
Aimee B
Light Your Heart Up
'Cause I see you feeling down
I'll be trying to calm and fade it
But you don't wanna turn around
Teenage is so complicated
Come on, Come on, ain't no one who can take your place
Oh baby
Please let me see you smiling

Its such a pain in the neck we have homework by tomorrow
I know you're not a person who would be worn out with sorrow
To fly away from your past is not so easy
But dizzy!

Keep your faith, raise your lively face
Just get rid of your broken wings
You're strong enough by now I'll be your spark when you're lost in the dark And let me Be your sun, Be your match to
Light Your Heart Up Light Your Heart Up (If you want to) Light Your Heart Up Beside you leads a winding road,
There some troubles make you stumble
But you were gonna beat them all
Loner girl is hard to crumble
I know, I know, ain't no one who can touch your heart
But baby
Please let me see you crying Your sort of square, why don't we ditch that class it's time to chill out I know you're not a person who would get excited and shout The sky above your thick cloud is not so gritty But pretty! Keep your faith, raise your lively face Just get rid of your broken wings, you're strong enough by now I'll be your spark when you're lost in the dark And let me Be your sun, be your match to
Light Your Heart Up Keep your faith, raise your lively face Just get rid of your broken wings, you're strong enough by now I'll be your spark when you're lost in the dark And let me Be your sun, be your match to
Light Your Heart Up
Light Your Heart Up (If you want to) Light Your Heart Up Sing it now, sing it loud Sha la la la la la la I'm your buddy, all the way You may thank me day-by-day
Sing it now, sing it loud Sha la la la la la la I'm your buddy, all the way You may thank me day-by-day
Eternity with you



                         Nothing shakes my soul quite like your love

                        Its weakness takes me over, pulls me under

                                           If we’re drowning

                          I hope we never reach the surface again

    And the glittering lights will break in shards against the soles of our feet

                                         As we dive deeper

                                        If we only die once

                                       I want to die with you

When his eyes open for the second time, he finds that breathing is so much easier. His body feels soft, inconsistent, but he tilts his head and Naruto is there. Right where he’d landed, but the swelling and bruising on his face has disappeared as if it had never existed.

“Where are we?” Naruto asks, glancing at him, “Could this be… heaven?”

“You tell me,” he answers, sweeping his eyes over empty space. “Everything looks… hazy.”

And it is true. The air around them seems to shimmer, as if they are surrounded by invisible water, no color, no sound, simply nothingness.

Patting what is supposedly the ground next to him with one hand, Naruto slowly sits up, fascinated by the ripples of liquid smoke that brushes his skin.

“We got our arms back,” Sasuke observes, and Naruto sends him a sharp look, sharp enough to tear right through him.

“So we can still fight.”

Giving the other boy a look of disbelief, Sasuke smiles despite himself. When Naruto’s face scrunches up with the first signs of anger, he laughs.

“Even after all this, here of all places, you still want to fight me?”

“Of course!” Naruto shuffles closer to him, staring down into his eyes. “I’ll take you on any time!”

Sitting up as well, Sasuke rubs his left eye with a slightly shaky hand, feeling strangely empty with all the pain gone from his system.

“No, I’ll admit it. This was my loss.”

For a second, though considering time seemed irrelevant here it might have been considerably longer, they stare at each other. Then Naruto shouts, his voice echoing off invisible walls.

“You stupid asshole! As if you could win or lose this fight! This is between friends, and I said I’d smack some sense into you! The real fight comes after that!”

Sighing, Sasuke feels another smile grace his lips.

“Hey, Naruto… If we’re dead, then that eternal destiny the sage of the six paths talked about has ended, hasn’t it? I’m sure the infinite tsukuyomi has dispelled…”

Silence settles between them once again, but through it, Sasuke can sense Naruto’s heartbeat, a calm and steady beat, much unlike the struggling rhythm it had the last time they talked.

“So in the end, you never did leave me alone.”

Reaching out a hand, Naruto runs a finger down Sasuke’s cheek, an unreadable look on his face. His eyes trace his features as his fingers run along his jaw in a caress that, rather than exciting, feels so reassuring that Sasuke has to wonder how he lived without it before.

“I told you,” Naruto says quietly, tugging slightly so that he has no choice but lean forwards. “I just can’t leave you alone.”

Sasuke knows that logically, his body should react to Naruto’s words. His heart should clench painfully, his limbs should feel weak, his breath should hitch… Instead, gentle warmth settles within his chest, whispering to him in gentle caresses.

“We’re dead, Naruto,” he breathes, raising a hand to brush along Naruto’s fingers. “You can tell me the truth.”

Naruto smiles then, a smile that seems to light him up from inside, a smile that envelopes Sasuke in its brightness.

“But you already know, don’t you?”

The world swirls around them, colors of velvety black and glittering yellow and red and green ripping through the haze, expanding so fast it feels as if Sasuke’s mind has expanded with it.

He intertwines his fingers with Naruto’s, the connection keeping his soul steady since his body might float away.


They stand up then, Naruto gripping his hand tightly, bringing him with him like a guiding light through the flickering vastness. Each step creates sparkling colors that washes over their bare feet, the air is soft when it fills their lungs but like fluttering butterfly wings when they exhale, though this barely registers in the back of his mind.

All he sees is Naruto.

All he feels is Naruto.

And he knows that Naruto feels the same.

Eventually, they reach a place where the not-really ground billows and surges with glossy darkness, seemingly sinking downwards. As they stop, Sasuke can feel a light pull calling for him, like a thread of his brother’s chakra curling around his ankles.

“What do you think it is?” Naruto asks, tilting his head in contemplation.

“Maybe… it’s for us. If we want to move on.”

They glance at each other, electric blue clashing with swirling black. Then Naruto raises his head towards the left, and Sasuke follows his gaze to find more nothingness filled with clusters of colorful, wispy clouds.

“Or we could take a walk,” Naruto suggests, looking back at him.

“We could be walking around for eternity,” Sasuke argues, causing Naruto to let out a brilliant laugh.

“Bastard, here I offer to walk with you for eternity, and you’re going to argue with me that it’s too long? We’re dead, what does it matter if it’s for eternity or an hour?”

Gnawing on his lips, Sasuke mulls the thought over, weighs the pros and cons of being stuck with Naruto for possibly eternity.

“I guess, if it’s you… I don’t mind eternity.”

Giving his hand an encouraging squeeze, Naruto steers him towards the left, away from the dark waterfall.

“You know, we’ve got stuff to talk about. And you wanted to talk to me anyway, right? I have to tell you about Ero-sennin, and everything that happened in Konoha, and chasing after you…”

His words fade, but Sasuke smiles all the same.

“I’d like that.”

And considering how much Naruto can talk, he wonders if eternity will be enough.