i would leave me

Notes Pt. II – Zach Dempsey x Reader

Summary: 13 Reasons Why. On tape number 7, as we all know, is the chapter of Zach Dempsey and the “joke” that makes Hannah with the note in her bag.

Request.  Part 2 to notes please?”

“If it is okay can you make a part 2. For the Zack Dempsey x reader notes story please? You’re writing is amazing

“Second part to Zach Dempsey x Reader"Notes" pleaseeee💜🙏🏽😍

I heard this song while I was writing.

Words: 2746

Reader’s point of view.

Enjoy it!

Don’t miss Pt. I


Your name: submit What is this?

The next few days became more or less normal. The atmosphere in the communication class had been regulated, that is to say, with a sideways notice that Hannah Baker’s bag was again having those drawings of rabbits, her smile was coming back and on more than one occasion caught her looking at Zach every time she took out her paper from her bag, as if she still didn’t believe that he had really stopped teasing her about it. The one who didn’t even cross glances with him, was me.

I avoided the temptation to give him even a sidelong glance, I knew he was there, because I heard his voice, his laughter and sometimes another comment during the debates, and I was intimidated by his presence, I preferred not to speak, because I didn’t want to  be noticed, not by him, even though I knew it was impossible, because sometimes I felt like someone was staring at my back, It couldn’t be someone other than him. And I simply avoided it, because I didn’t know what to say after reading his note and that, practically made him angry when faced with something that, as he had said, was none of my business.

Me and my stupid reactions to seeing an unjust and immature act. Maybe it was Hannah’s words said in the hallway that softened my heart. I had never heard a voice as broken and hurt as her own. I was struck by the fact that for some people a detail as small as that of anonymous compliments in a paper bag could be really important and for others it was simply a gesture that helped them to raise their ego or just let it go, take it only as a boring project, which had to be carried out to get a good grade with the teacher. No one passed the teacher’s smile when she saw her students take notes from their paper bags. As for me, I had totally gone from mine. I was afraid, what if there was some note from Zach? Would it take me so long to read it again? What if he said that he regretted the first one he had left me? I didn’t want to wreck my heart any more than I already had it today. It seemed i had missed a chance with the boy i was in love with. Bravo for me.

Underneath my folder I took out a small piece of paper folded in half, I twirled my fingers indecisively, it wasn’t the note of Zach or another person, this time, it was one written by me for Zach Dempsey. On one impulse i had written “Yes, I want to go out with you” but my cowardice prevented me from leaving it in his paper bag at some point. And I had not written it today. The day I confronted him, I arrived at my house, went to my desk and immediately wrote it. I have carried this note for more than forty-eight hours, waiting for the moment when I had a fit of courage and do it. I didn’t feel brave on this day, either.

The doorbell rang and I jumped. I had completely lost the notion of time and above all, the interesting debate of the class. I didn’t move. I had become accustomed to waiting for the player to go out first and away enough, then I would sit for a few seconds at my desk, waiting for the note to fly out of my hand and end up in his bag. That was the way I was until I was alone in the classroom, and today was no exception. I closed my folder slowly, hoping to prolong my air of cowardice, I got up and taking my things and I walked to the bags. I pretended to check mine, there were at least four but I ignored them. My stomach contracted as I headed for Zach’s. I held the note in the air, if I released it I would fall inside. My hands trembled as I imagined different scenarios about his reactions as he read it. Would he smile? Would he throw it in the trash can? Would he look at me with a bad face? Or would he make fun of me? I was about to let go, but finally I held it in my fist and left the classroom as soon as I could. Y/N, 0 - Cowardice, 3.

When I was under pressure, stressed or alert, one of my effective methods was to go to Monet’s and order my favorite drink while I sat at one of the tables and watched life pass before my eyes. It was common for me to go there alone, from time to time I went with my friends but this time I didn’t want a kind of company. So, here I was, with the drink in front of me, my eyes scanning it as if there was something suspicious in it and the small but lethal note at my side, shouting at me to give it to his sender, to stop being such a coward, i lost more opportunities. I began to drink by sips, ignoring the calls of my mind for a piece of paper and a little wrinkled. The point of being here was to lower my heart rate to a remotely normal one, not to continue tormenting me for what I do and what not.

The doorbell rang. Voices began to announce themselves as if it were a party. My body tensed when one of them stood out more than the others. Zach stood out for having a pleasantly serious voice. I fixed my eyes on the drink just after hiding my note in the bag of my jacket, better safe than sorry … or face. And I couldn’t face Zach Dempsey on matters of the heart, for my own sake.

Bad luck pursued me, indeed, it was one of my faithful friends. The basketball team passed me, without turning to see me, or at least the majority. Finally they settled on a table a few meters from mine. Zach passed slowly and then, looked at me. I looked back at him and he smiled, but in a gesture barely visible, and that if I had blinked, I would have missed it. My breath stopped and I swore my face began to redden. Suddenly I lost the taste for my drink and in my mind, I ended up turning the table and running out of the place … and the city. But I forced myself to remain there, unconsciously clutched my hands to the chair, fearing that my body would take control and get me out of here. Sometimes, in intense moments, one acted by pure instinct. This time it wasn’t going to happen to me. Again I shared an “intimate look” with my drink. I had seen it more than I did, but I couldn’t turn anywhere, much less to my right. I decided that, I would finish my drink and with all the calm of the world, apparently, would leave of here. As if I didn’t care, as if his presence didn’t disturb me.

But, when I drank the last sip and was practically already taking my wallet, the chair in front of me moved. I swallowed so quickly that I felt drowned, I had to restrain myself as I raised my eyes to my new table mate, who more than the best basketball player of Liberty High. Zach Dempsey stared at me in silence, his hands folded across the table. His eyes bulged me and I suddenly felt that he made me small in my place. I had no escape, or perhaps if i was beginning to think it a good idea to run, although behind me i would leave stunned eyes, and, why not, laughs full of mockery. I didn’t calculate how long we looked at each other, it seemed like a competition, to see who gave up first and decided to speak, though, why should I? I wasn’t the one who invaded my table. He had the obligation to start a conversation, he was the one who sat down and also disturbed my ideas and instincts. I was grateful that he couldn’t hear the beating of my heart, it seemed that I had run a marathon.

“Are you mad at me?” He finally gave in.

But it took me a few seconds to find my voice.

“Should I?” I mumbled.

Little by little I relaxed, reminding myself that Zach wouldn’t kill me. We argued for some nonsense, it was even funny because we were not friends or anything, it even seemed to be our first real conversation. Maybe now we would talk like two civilized people. At least I would try.

“Because of … you know” He sighed and I shrugged “Y/N, you haven’t looked at me for more than two days, in fact, this is the first time you look at me”

Then he realized, anyway, it wasn’t like i was trying to hide it.

“I’m not mad at you, Zach, I still think it was an immature act, but you were right it’s not my business.” He nodded and I set my glass aside. “Besides, why do you care if I’m mad at you or not?” Really, Y/N? Do you really ask that after reading his note? “I thought and wanted to punch my forehead.

"I don’t know”

“We aren’t friends” I said.

“We could be,” he said softly.

I almost smiled. But I didn’t know what to say. Actually yes, I should have already let go that I had finally read his note and that the answer was in my jacket. I could slip it to him and go. I had to do it. Come on, Y/N, you can do it. You’re no longer a coward. You’re talking to him after days, it’s a good start.

My hand flew to the pocket of my jacket, ready to take out the note and leave it on the table. I opened my mouth to finish with this, I shuddered.

“I have a lot of homework, so …”

I dropped into place. I took my hand away from my pocket, took my backpack from the floor, protected my chest with the folder and got up quickly. I appreciated that my order was already paid, now I would only be in charge of fast home and lock myself in my room, possibly hiding under the sheets. If, speaking of immature acts, I was about to make one as well.

I felt the keys in my pocket as I made my way to the parking lot, the faster I got out of here, the more I would breathe normally.

“Y/N!”

I stopped, although I shouldn’t have done it. I turned acting more for the attraction to his voice and saw Zach trot straight for me. New opportunity I should not be wasted.

“Can I ask you something?”

“Sure”

I dropped at my own risk.

“Did you read my note?”

This is my opportunity. My lips were sealed, I had to, I had to answer him, I had to give him the note and stay here to observe when he read it and watch his reactions. I smiled. It was the right time and perfect.

But again, cowardice took possession of my mind.

“No, Zach, I’m sorry”

I quickly took the keys from my car and ran towards this one. Already inside I felt safe but so damn bad for lied, but above all, to have wasted what may have been my last chance.

It was midnight and I lay on my bed looking at the ceiling. My homework was ready and even my room was strangely clean. I had made sure that once I got home I would keep my mind occupied. I even volunteered to wash the dinner plates, when, normally, I was forced to do so. I also cleaned the kitchen and made sure to make an exhaustive inventory of the missing supplies. Maybe tomorrow I would offer to do the shopping, that wasn’t my task but if I kept my mind away from guilt, I would gladly accept it. But what could i do in hours when i should already be asleep? Especially when I didn’t have a hint of sleep. I turned around in bed, closed my eyes, counted sheep, and even listened to some music, but nothing, my mind was so awake. The damn fault didn’t leave me alone when I wanted to rest.

The screen on my phone light up, I picked it up again and noticed that an unknown number had sent me a message. I opened it and almost fell out of bed by surprise.

Get out of your house for a moment, please. - Zach

“What the hell?” I whispered looking at my window in a useless gesture, because it was covered by the curtains.

My heart fluttered and I got up, taking a sweater in my wake. The advantage is that the entrance door didn’t make noise when it opened, I could easily exit. I seized the impulse before I returned to my room to hide and pretend I had not seen the message, but I couldn’t live with two faults.

Zach was leaning in his car with his hands hidden in his pockets. He looked so damn handsome that I wanted to cry at that moment. A little frightened I approached him encounter, I hugged myself, wanting to protect myself from a danger that didn’t even exist, at least not physically, I wanted to convince myself of that.

“How do you have my number?” I let go as soon as I was close to him to speak in a low voice. The last thing i wanted was to wake the whole street. Besides, I’d be in trouble if I was outside at this hour.

“I didn’t come to talk about that,” he replied, too serious for my taste.

“Then why are you here?”

“I came to give you back something you left lying on Monet’s”

I quickly made a memory of whether something was missing, but everything seemed to be in order. Was it just an excuse to come here? What if he pulled something out and I had to pretend it belonged to me just not to “hurt” him? Probably someone sat in my place after I left, and it was that other person who forgot something.

I wanted the earth to swallow me when Zach reached into his pocket and handed me a folded piece of paper. I knew that note well. The world began to spin, I dropped my arms at my sides and stammered. My eyes traveled from the paper to his eyes, in these i could see that he had read its contents. I swallowed.

“Oh, God,” I whispered, putting a hand to my forehead.

“Now we are on hand, Y/N” He said with a smile “You read the note that I fell, now I read the one you left”

I looked at him, not knowing what to answer. I thanked the poor lighting, my face must be the color of a tomato.

“I also came to face you”

“Okay,” I whispered.

“You lied to me” He started taking my note, anyway, I didn’t want to see it again in my life “You told me that you hadn’t read my note and this proves that you did”

“I‘m sorry?”

Zach shrugged.

“I’ll pick you up tomorrow at seven.” He smiled.

I blinked several times.

“Wait what?”

He laughed and ducked his head for a few seconds.

“We’ll have a team party at Bryce’s house, and I already have your answer.” He balanced the note in front of me. “And I want you to go with me, as my date, Y/N.”

We were silent, I still couldn’t believe my clumsiness and that this really was happening. I had never fantasized that Zach Dempsey would show up at my house in the middle of the night to ask for a date… or actually let me know what his date would be. I covered my mouth and started laughing. I knew i had to respond, though, with that paper in the boy’s hand, there was more of an answer.

So I pushed away the cowardice and came up to embrace it even with laughter. I no longer felt ashamed or afraid of anything.

Masterlist

yvonnope  asked:

MADDIE I'M SOBBING ASDGHHJKL I haven't had to the opportunity to really be on tumblr lately so I don't know if you know or if someone told you but I found an actual Eros store (Eros 1207 is the full name) while I was driving around with my bro and I looked them up- and hoho buddy they do not sell jewelry (sex toys apparently, I was screaming with laughter) and I love IINYH and you love IINYH so I just... idk, wanted to tell ya a thing

ALSKJDFLJKSAD INCREDIBLE omgomg I bet canon Victuuri shops there,,, couLD YOU IMAGINE

Better Off Now

Originally posted by teenagegrungephotograph

This is a oneshot set at the Homecoming dance. The reader dances with Jughead. The song they dance to is Better Off Now by Trent Dabbs (for the ~full experience~ listen to the song to get the feel and then read) (this isn’t about the lyrics specifically, the song just has sad vibes)

Pairing: Jughead x reader

Words: 1180

Warnings: it’s not happy lol read if you want to hurt

Keep reading

  • Me: Sorry, that side door is locked.
  • Guy: Oh, well, I was just going to grab some cof... *trails off, notices no coffee*
  • Me: Yeah, there isn't any more, we closed a couple minutes ago.
  • Guy: Oh, I'm sorry! *proceeds to talk my ear off*
  • Me: *SCREAMING IN MY HEAD WHAT PART OF WE'RE CLOSED DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND I AM NO LONGER BEING PAID TO BE POLITE TO YOU GET OUT*
8

make me choosevilde and noora or jonas and isak? (asked by @orpheaus)

eres bonita como eres. you’re so cute, thank you so much ❤️ […] but hello, i don’t take spanish, what does it say? tienes que averiguarlo por tu misma, amiga.   

I think about you everyday,
But I don’t feel the urge to dial your number today.
I think I’ve finally realized the person greeting me at the other end won’t be the person who resides in my heart but Someone who left in the middle of the night and robbed me of all my faith in people.
For the longest time, I hated you.
I couldn’t understand why you would leave me when I needed you the most.
I just couldn’t understand why you couldn’t do 10% of what I did for you all these years.
You had to be a rotten person with a rotten soul.
Right? Right? Right!
Wrong.
I think I’ve finally come to understand the fault in you and that in most others around me.
You aren’t a bad person.
You are just weak.
I was expecting strength from a person who wouldn’t even know what that is.
I was expecting courage from someone who was filled with cowardice from head to toe.
I can’t really blame you for being weak but I can learn to not surround myself with people who don’t match my strength.
When I use the word ‘weak’, it’s not what you think.
I cry. All the time.
I display my emotions like I own a boutique.
I have weekly breakdowns.
Sometimes, I get nightmares while doing daily chores.
None of that is being weak.
Being weak is running away.
It is being selfish.
It is not being able to stand up for what you believe in.
It is not being able to say what you feel.
It is seeing someone suffer and rolling your eyes.
It is lies instead of a vocabulary.

You are weak.
I can forgive you.
I understand you aren’t a bad person.
I forgive you.
I have the strength to do so.

If you’ve ever wondered what 200+ hours of Mercy in diamond rank competitive looks like then search no further

EDIT: why the actual FUCK does Tumblr destroy the quality of my videos to the point it looks like ass?? YouTube version looks better

keith: hunk is right

hunk, immediately pulling keith down into a kiss: man i love hearing that

2

TID appreciation week 2017

Day 6 - Favorite Scene: The Ball

She looked up at him, lips parted in bewilderment. “Know what?” she said, and Will, with a sigh of something like defeat, kissed her.

He traced slow, glancing butterfly kisses across her mouth, each as measured as the beat of a heart, each saying she was precious, irreplaceable, wanted. Tessa could no longer keep her hands at her sides. She reached to cup the back of his neck, to tangle her fingers in the dark silky waves of his hair, to feel his pulse hammering against her palms.

All the pieces inside her that had felt broken and jagged when se looked at Will these past few weeks began to knit together and heal. She felt light, as if she could float.

“Will,” she whispered against his mouth. She wanted him closer to her so badly, it was like an ache, a painful hot ache that spread out from her stomach to speed her heart and knot her hands in his hair and set her skin to burning. “Will, you need not be so careful. I will not break.”

It’s easter which means I’ll be dragged to family meeting, forced to lie about how pure family is, pretend I’m praying for 5 minutes, eat, leave, forget half of the racist/homophobic/transphobic shit that will be said and sleep for the rest of the day

anonymous asked:

chloe in a beekini

She wants to know how you got to her personal roof pool.

I love puns, thank you, Anon. Also I might have gone overboard but I really like how this came out :>

Artwork ©: alazic02

Do not repost.

For 500 followers milestone, now closed.

4

“Distance makes the heart grow fonder
said by someone
stronger than me…
So what do I do now…”


Kageyama knew, he knew he’d lose Hinata one day to the terrible sickness rooted in his brain. But he never thought it would be so soon. He never thought it’d happen before they’d played at Nationals, before they’d gone to college, before they got to truly experience the feeling of being in love. He didn’t think the world could be so cruel… but it was.

I told you I was afraid to fall in love again and you made me feel that you would keep me sade. And then you just left me. Even so, I still love you.
—  Unknown