i would do anything to let you destroy me

  • Yuri: ::gets fourth in the short program::
  • Me: Thank God! Rules of writing and sports anime dictate that if he'd done better in the short program, he almost certainly would've had no chance to get gold in the GPF, so this is actually a good thing for him! Having him just be first the whole way through would've destroyed the narrative tension. Seeing Yurio do so well is also narratively appropriate for his arc, so that's also not surprising.
  • Yuri: ::in the preview:: Let's end this...
  • Me: Could mean anything. A stinger is meant to leave you in suspense, so I kinda expected this, too. The words in the teaser are just that--to tease. Of course there's gonna be tension and Yuri's gonna freak out--he has chronic anxiety and self-doubt. Yuri and Viktor still look in love and happy, so it's probably just referring to coaching and shit. I am literally not surprised by any of this.
  • The rest of the fandom: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH THIS IS A BETRAYAL AHHHHHHHHHHHH I DIDN'T EXPECT THIS AHHHHHHHHHHH WHAT IS KUBO DOING
  • Me: ...
  • Me: Whelp, time to blacklist the tag until next week, because this shit it going to drive me insane.

what if even you’re laughing at me behind my back? what if im a joke to you too? are you gonna leave me too? you say you wont but everyone has.. how will you hurt me? you say you wont but everyone has… and i would let you do anything to me honestly. id happily let you destroy me if it were you doing it but i don’t think i could take it.

Getting Started With Magic

This post is based off of my experiences. YMMV.

If I could go back in time and talk to my (more) inexperienced self, this is the letter that I would hand me.

A Warning

No matter how weak think you are, you are powerful enough to destroy your own life. Respect what magic can bring you. Respect what it can take away.

Bits and Bobs

“Magic” means to make stuff happen through nonphysical means.

“Visualization” means imagining. Visions are spontaneous visualizations.

Never let anyone take away your power.

Never, ever, invite a spirit in to your mind or body.

Never let anyone or anything make you believe you do not have the power to do something.

Magic is dangerous. Respect it.

It is okay to want validation that your beliefs are real. It is not really very nice to go around casting spells on people just to prove to yourself that you have power.

Your beliefs will evolve. Don’t marry yourself to one system.

Magic is reflected in Nature. Nature is reflected in magic. If it doesn’t happen in Nature, it doesn’t happen in magic.

Order of Operations

Get started with magic in this order:

Prepare → cleanse → protect → prosperity → spells and divination. During all of this, continue your research and education.

Preparation

There are a few things you will want before you get started in magic.

  • A journal – keep a regular diary of things that happen to you in your day to day life. Include all divination you do, visions you have, your dreams, interesting things that happen to you, and all spells you cast or magical workings you perform. Remember that a journal can also be on your phone or laptop. As a side note, a Book of Shadows is a Wiccan tool with special significance to that path. If you are not Wiccan you do not need a BOS. A plain journal and spellbook will suffice.
  • A spellbook – if you want something separate from your journal to keep spells in. Record in this notebook, binder, or text document different spells you want to try and have tried, as well as any magical recipes you find interesting. I find that a side Tumblr blog makes an excellent spellbook.
  • Three plant friends – acquire any three of these dried herbs:  rosemary, sage, rue, agrimony, angelica, anise, basil, bay leaf, caraway, castor beans, cinnamon, cloves, eucalyptus, hyssop, lavender, mint, mugwort, mullein, valerian, vervain, or wormwood. Getting them from the kitchen or grocery aisle will be just fine. These herbs are all very powerful protectors and will work with you to your benefit. Get as much as you can of each.
  • Arts and crafts supplies – depending on your inclinations you will want to be able to craft your own poppets, sachets, wish boxes, magical inks, and the like. Any hobby can be adapted to become a magical outlet. If you would like a shopping list, here you go: A good pair of scissors, a box of pins or needles, some good red or black thread (cotton or biodegradable if possible), jars of red and/or black ink, dip pens, a book of cardstock for making paper talismans, neutral colored fabric (cotton or biodegradable), a variety of candles (white unscented tea lights are fine, get a carton of 100; jar candles are excellent in any color; and taper candles in a variety of colors), candle holders, incense in any scent you prefer, incense holders, charcoal self-lighting disks, a live herbal plant (one of the herbs listed above will work great), a fire-safe dish in which to hold the charcoal disks.
  • Storage containers – you will be needing plenty of these! Mason jars or jars of any type are excellent. Get also plastic baggies, and start a collection of boxes of every size. You will thank yourself later.

If you are short on money (hopefully, not for long) or you must necessarily remain “in the woods”, then simply acquire a journal and your three plant friends, and let the rest come as it will.

Begin by choosing for yourself a magical name. This is any name or word that you enjoy. If you are part of a tradition with rules on how to choose a magical name, follow that tradition’s rules. Otherwise, choose any name you like. Record your magical name in your journal and always use it when doing magic or interacting with spirits.

Cleanse

It is time to do your first magic! In magic, cleansing is a vital tool. Just as you clean your home physically, you also need to clean it spiritually. There is no need to agonize over doing your first spell. Cleanse as soon as you are able; do it today if possible.

Take a portion of your three magical plant friends. Put them in a cloth sachet, and tie the top closed with some thread or yarn. Now it is time to do your first spirit work. Over the sachet, repeat these words with the correct names substituted:

“Spirit of [herb], I humbly request you visit me today. Please bring your renowned powers of cleansing and protection to my spell. Infuse with the water and make me pure.”

Repeat this three times, one for each of the plants you have chosen. As you say these words, visualize (imagine) that the spirit of the plant returns to the dried herbs and glows a vivid color. Drop the sachet in a hot bath and soak. Scrub yourself down with the herbal water starting at the crown of your head and going down towards your toes. As you wash, visualize the vivid colors of the plant spirits washing over you and carrying away all gunky energy, all parasites, and every bad and negative feeling you have. Even as you finish your bath and dry off, the colors remain around you in a protective shield. Perhaps when you close your eyes and think about being protected, you will feel safe and see those colors again.

Congratulations – you have performed your first spell! Drain the tub as normal and thank the plants (“thank you [herb] for your help today.”) Then dispose of the plants in the compost if possible; otherwise toss them. Keep your cloth sachet for later use. If you do not have a tub, do this instead: ask the plants for help as usual, but instead of adding them to a sachet, put them in a quart of boiling water as if making tea. Once the tea has cooled, take it to the shower and pour it over yourself, using that water to wash instead. Use the same visualizations and closing.

After you have cleansed yourself, record the process in your journal and how you feel afterwords.

Now it is time to cleanse your home. Again you will be calling upon your plant allies. The easiest way to do this – and perhaps the most traditional – is to burn some protective herbs as incense and fumigate your home with them. You will again want to invite the plant spirits back in to the dried herb matter. Carrying the burning plants from room to room, repeat a chant of purification and protection (the simplest being, “purify, protect, and bless.” But I encourage you to write your own.) It is okay to think your magical chant as well. When you think magical spells, have a device that signifies you are speaking words of Magical Significance. I do this by imagining my voice turns a certain color and emanates throughout the worlds. Find your own way to focus your thoughts so that it is clear to you when you are and aren’t using magical thinking.

Unfortunately not many of us can hotbox our entire house with rosemary smoke. A good second option is to again brew your herbs as a tea, and strain it out, then pour the tea to a spray bottle and spritz your home with magical water instead. Again repeat your magical chant.

Here is a third option: take a bowl of your enspirited plant allies in to each room. Sit quietly and imagine their vivid spirits filling the room, pushing out any bad or negative energies or spirits. If you cannot fully imagine each room being filled, then it isn’t being totally purified. As the spirits fill the room, again, say or think your magical chant.

Especially if you chose that last option, you may find yourself to be rather drained after two cleansings in a day. This is quite normal. Magical energy is an energy, just like any other, that us humans use in our day to day life. Just as we are tired after expending emotional or physical energy, we are also tired after expending magical energy. Eat plenty of nutritious food and get lots of sleep. Be sure to record your spellwork in your journal.

Protect

In general you will want to protect yourself, your home, and whoever lives in your home, from all forms of spiritual attack. No defense is totally foolproof. In Nature, the stronger a defense is, the more burdensome it is on whomever it is protecting. Lock something up in Fort Knox and it is very well protected, but not very flexible or accessible. You do not want to lock yourself up in an ivory tower; you just want to add a few fortifications to your home.

Start by crafting a personal protection for yourself.

Cross Protection

Take two nails or twigs from holy trees. Hold one vertically and imagine that it is an extremely powerful barrier, carrying with it either the virtue of iron or the virtues of the tree it came from. Hold the other twig or nail horizontally and imagine a barrier shooting out from it, so that nothing could possibly pass. Place the two twigs or nails together so they form a cross or X shape. As they touch, imagine a mighty clang ring out as your two protectors seal together to create an impenetrable shield. Bind the twigs or nails with black or red thread. Ensure the sticks never come apart again; if they do, even for a moment, the enchantment is lost. Tie more thread to this amulet or attach it to a necklace to wear it.

SATOR Square

Draw the SATOR Square on good card stock if available; an index card will do – otherwise, plain paper. Use black or red ink – magical ink is awesome, otherwise a Sharpie is fine. As you draw each line, be aware that you are drawing an immensely powerful protective amulet. With each line and letter you draw, imagine the power within building up and up until it is almost exploding. As you make the last mark, watch the power “click” together and become a cohesive unit. Like a wave, the power will spread out and form a complete and powerful shield, perhaps golden or yellow in color. Nothing malicious can cross this barrier. Punch a small hole in the paper (the square itself does not need to be large at all; make it as small as you desire while allowing the lines to remain distinct) and string it on thread to wear.

Jewelry Enchantment

Take any one or three of the protective herbs listed above. Burn them on charcoal disks or make a tea out of them. Hold your chosen article of jewelry over the smoke or place it within the water. Chant three times, “purify, protect, and bless.” Call to the spirit of the plant: “Rosemary, I call on you today to lay a powerful enchantment on this [ring, necklace, etc]. Make it the strongest shield that you know, which no malicious force could dream of crossing.” Take some whiskey, red wine, or raw egg. Put a drop if it on the jewelry as payment to the plant. Perform a sign of sealing (such as saying “so mote it be”).

Practice crafting personal protections for a few days. Have many on hand, with different words and plant spirits used in their creation. Carefully record each enchantment in your journal so you always know which enchantment to use when the time comes for defense.

Now you will need to protect your home. Take a jar or other container. Put in it some dirt from your property and put it in the jar. Draw an accurate picture of your home or apartment and put the picture in the jar. Now choose three of your plant friends. Call their spirits as you have been practicing. “Spirit of [herb], I request your aid in my spell today. Bring ultimate protection against all evil and malicious force to my home.” Use your intuition to determine how much of each herb to add to the jar or container. When the you are done, imagine the vivid colors of the plant spirits growing massive in scale, covering your entire home in a powerful and impenetrable shield. By the power of three no malicious force may cross this barrier. Close the container and light a candle on top of it to charge it and seal it. Store the container in a safe space and recharge it with candles once a month. In times of crisis, recharge the jar either weekly or daily. Also leave it in the sun for a few hours, once a month. If the dried herbs within rot, you are experiencing a major spiritual attack. Immediately redouble your defenses and take care of your business.

As with all your spells, be sure to record these in your journal.

Now you have performed cleansings and protections and already have your first experience in magic and spirit work. Now that the basics are taken care of, let’s roll around to building an altar and taking care of a few basic problems in your life.

Prosperity

A prosperity altar is in my opinion the first non-protective magic someone should attempt. If you have a major crisis in your life, take care of that first; otherwise, turn to prosperity. Prosperity does not mean greed or wealth. Think of all the areas in life you can be prosperous: In your hobbies, in your job, in your school work, in your motivation, in your friendships. A prosperity altar brings muchness in to your life. It removes blockages that prevents you from being successful.

Traditionally an altar is a cleared away space such as a table or shelf where things can be arranged and placed with magical intent. Not everyone is able to have such a space, however. Consider creating a Tumblr blog as an altar, or a large jar or box.

First you will want to cleanse your shelf or container. Again bring out your plant allies (I hope you really did buy a large quantity of them) and cleanse in your own personal way. Consider laying down an altar cloth. I use folded up sarongs for my altar cloths. You can use anything you wish. Consider sewing or knitting your own altar cloth for a personal touch.

Begin to collect and add a variety of items to your alter. Here are some suggestions.

  • Candles in the color of money or valuable gemstones. Green, gold, and silver are traditional.
  • Real or fake money, and as much of it as possible.
  • Costume jewelry, glass ‘gemstones’, and rocks painted gold or silver.
  • Rice, grains, almonds, allspice, cinnamon, chamomile, dill, fenugreek, mint, and basil.
  • Images of magpies, dragons, or other entities that collect treasures.
  • Drawings or images of yourself being highly prosperous, receiving everything you want, and having things going your way.
  • Statements of power, such as “I am prosperous” or “I receive every good thing.”

Give each item a purpose. “This candle acts as a beacon to draw prosperity to me. This stone acts as an anchor to hold prosperity in my life. This statement of power directs the energy in my life.” Meditate with your altar once a day or however often it is possible for you to do so. Visualize your altar steadily gaining more power, overflowing with prosperous energies. This altar acts as a center point for prosperous energies to enter your life. Expect to see changes in your prosperity soon.

Spells and Divination

Think of what you would like to change in your life. Most adults have one or two things they would prefer to change. Would you like more hours at work? Or for your co-worker to get out of town for a little while? Or, perhaps you want to heal a relationship with an old friend, or make enough money to go on a trip next spring. Make a list of things you want to change.

Listing each individual spell is outside the scope of this basic guide. However, I can go over some simple spellcrafting.

Each spell should have three components. Your willpower and focus, the power of a spirit ally, and a physical action that supports your magical goals.

Your willpower and focus means directing the energies you raise through words, actions, and visualizations. In the home cleansing, you may have visualized the spirits filling a room while you repeated the phrase “purify, protect, and bless.” This is using your willpower and focus. Another example is meditating before your prosperity altar and imagining good things happening to you. Working with tools and ingredients can focus your willpower. Consider the power of stabbing a poppet with a needle; this is an excellent point of focus. I prefer to specifically use a visualization and a spoken phrase to raise and focus willpower.

A spirit ally may be one of the plants we have been using up to this point. It could also be a crystal, or the flame elemental from a candle. It could be the spirit of the Sun or Moon, or the land you live upon. It could be a feather or a dish of water. When constructing your spirit call, speak directly and honestly. Ask the spirit of whatever it is you are working with to come to you and aid you in your magic. Of course you will want to align the spirit work you are doing with the spell at hand. You would not call on a plant of purity to curse someone, for example.

Lastly, you will need to make physical actions that support the intent of your spell. For a job spell, this means making calls and turning in resumes. For a friendship spell, this means going out to try and meet new people. Imagine that reality is smooth as glass, and magic is floating above it, trying to get in. But the surface of reality is too dense and smooth for magic to get a foothold. When you take physical actions that support your spell, you create grooves in reality that allow your magic to come down and manifest.

To craft a spell, first write down what you want to happen. “I want more hours at work,” for example. Decide what spirits you would like to include in your spell, and what props you would like to use. Simply do your research on spirits – in this spell, let’s use almonds and basil. I think a good prop would be to make a mock time sheet, and fill it out with you receiving exactly how many hours you want. Don’t go overboard or you may be asked to work too often!

Invite the spirits of almond and basil to your spell. “Spirit of Almond, I ask you come to my spell today, to bring me great treasures and wealth. Spirit of Basil, I ask you come to my spell today, to bring me prosperity unbound.” Explain to the plant spirits what you want to happen: “I require more hours at work. I want to work forty hours a week.” Then, employing your willpower and focus, visualize the plant spirits flowing through your life and opening up pathways that will give you more hours at work. Perhaps store your mock time sheet with the herbs and forty pennies (one for each hour you wish to work in a week) to create a jar spell. Or, burn the herbs and time sheet to release their power in to the universe. After this, employ your physical actions by reminding your boss that you are free to work more hours.

Just remember to use your focus, have a spirit ally, and to back your spell up with physical actions. Here are two other ideas for spells:

To make yourself more open and friendly, create a poppet of yourself (remember that poppets can be made out of anything – cloth, wax, clay, flour paste, paper mache, etc.) Call on the spirit of allspice to make yourself more warm and friendly. Mix the allspice in with the poppet you create or coat the poppet with allspice. Explain to the poppet what you want to happen. Store it in a safe place. Then, watch youtube videos or read books on how to open up and be more charismatic.

To increase your psychic awareness, draw a picture of yourself with a large purple third eye. Take some bay leaf, cinnamon, rose, or star anise and call upon their spirits for their renowned powers of psychic awareness. Place these herbs on the third eye of your drawing and meditate, imagining your own third eye opening and shining out a brilliant purple light. Store the herbs with your drawing as a jar spell and meditate with it once a day for three weeks, then after that once or twice a week. Your physical action should be practicing intuitive thinking.

Just as you practice spellwork, you will probably want to practice divination! Acquire some tarot or oracle cards, runes, or three pennies for the I-Ching. Or, simply use a book for bibliomancy. I will leave it up to you to research exactly how to divine, but let me tell you that spirit work and divination go hand in hand. Also consider using your plant or crystal allies to promote your divination skills and guide you to draw the right cards and make the correct interpretations.

Closing

I hope this post was helpful to some. If it raises any questions for you, feel free to contact me.

So I rolled a blacksmith instead of an actual character

GM: So you’re telling me that you’re going to spend the entire game making weapons and armor for your team?

Me: Yes.

GM: In what universe does that make sense?

Me: Listen, as long as I have access to a forge, I can make items for our team. We have an enchanter to enchant them. As we level up, our weapons will get more and more powerful, right?

GM: Okay…

Me: So we won’t need to buy anything in towns at later levels because we’ll just make it ourselves, and anything extra we have on the side we can give to wealthy noble families to forge alliances, or sell for profit.

GM: So you made a blacksmith in hopes that you would destroy the political and economic balance of the world?

Me: Yes. Exactly.

GM: Fuck it, let’s do this.

  • playing bastion: ah what an immersive and innovative game! truly the writers are masters of their craft to create such a poignant and inspiring story! this game is a masterpiece! a shining example of video games as an artistic medium!
  • playing transistor: IM IN REAL PHYSICAL PAIN. IM CRYING OVER A MAGICAL TALKING SWORD THAT SHOOTS LASERS. I HATE THIS GAME I HATE
dear samantha
i’m sorry
we have to get a divorce
i know that seems like an odd way to start a love letter but let me explain:
it’s not you
it sure as hell isn’t me
it’s just human beings don’t love as well as insects do
i love you.. far too much to let what we have be ruined by the failings of our species
i saw the way you looked at the waiter last night
i know you would never DO anything, you never do but..
i saw the way you looked at the waiter last night
did you know that when a female fly accepts the pheromones put off by a male fly, it re-writes her brain, destroys the receptors that receive pheromones, sensing the change, the male fly does the same. when two flies love each other they do it so hard, they will never love anything else ever again. if either one of them dies before procreation can happen both sets of genetic code are lost forever. now that… is dedication.
after Elizabeth and i broke up we spent three days dividing everything we had bought together
like if i knew what pots were mine like if i knew which drapes were mine somehow the pain would go away
this is not true
after two praying mantises mate, the nervous system of the male begins to shut down
while he still has control over his motor functions
he flops onto his back, exposing his soft underbelly up to his lover like a gift
she then proceeds to lovingly dice him into tiny cubes
spooning every morsel into her mouth
she wastes nothing
even the exoskeleton goes
she does this so that once their children are born she has something to regurgitate to feed them
now that.. is selflessness
i could never do that for you
so i have a new plan
i’m gonna leave you now
i’m gonna spend the rest of my life committing petty injustices
i hope you do the same
i will jay walk at every opportunity
i will steal things i could easily afford
i will be rude to strangers
i hope you do the same
i hope reincarnation is real
i hope our petty crimes are enough to cause us to be reborn as lesser creatures
i hope we are reborn as flies
so that we can love each other as hard as we were meant to.
—  Jared Singer, An Entomologist’s Last Love Letter
4

the day before I left for Germany and Austria my dad gave me a blank notebook and pen from @mujiusa and said “I don’t know if you want this but you can write about your travels maybe” and I’m so glad he did. I treasure this little blank notebook more than anything because it holds memories and pictures and beer coasters and emotions that would otherwise be forgotten or thrown out when I returned home. I never thought I would ever have a journal, let alone one that has become so special for me. //
“If we do not honour our past, we lose our future. If we destroy our roots, we will not grow.”
-Hundertswasser

OKay you know what absolutely destroys me?

Giants calling tinies ‘little one’

That has got to be on my top 10 favorite tropes ever. It makes me feel taken care of for some reason. And just like, it brings an image to mind of a giant just gently stroking their tiny that they would do anything for, and just letting the tiny know that they’re safe no matter what in the giant’s care. Just like “goodnight, little one” or “shhhh, sleep now, little one”

aaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

the threat in it self

Let me get a little serious for a second.
My dearest TCC, teacher crush community, I see a threat in each of us. In every individual behind these blogs.
Let me break it to you: We have the potential to destroy ourselves through our desperation. And I am not talking about being self-destructive. That’s a risk as well, indeed, but I am talking about the way we’d do anything for our TCs.
Look, I myself, would do anything for my TC and I bet so do you. Can you imagine what an easy victim that does make us?
We are willing to get used and to stay silent about it.
Let that sink in…
Maybe I am jsut really negative right now and a little depressed because I am missing my TC so much but… think about how actual dangerous it is. If there was a teacher, aware of your crush and with a little fucked up personality, he could use and break you with your full permission.

You tell me you don’t want anyone but me, but one day that will change. I remember when you told me I was your soulmate and I denied, I will continue to deny it. Because logically people don’t believe in stuff like that. But I swear on the day I fell for you I felt our souls connect in a way where I knew there was no logical reasoning that could explain what I felt for you and that hasn’t changed. at that moment I knew you would’ve given anything and everything to keep me alive, and I can’t have someone as deserving of love as you do this to yourself. I cant have you attempt to save me and destroy yourself in the process. I know you will think I am selfish in leaving but please believe me when I say letting you go is the most selfless decision I’ve ever made. I’m sorry I can’t be the girl of your dreams. It was silly for me to think that someone as wonderful as you would be able to selflessly destroy themselves for me. maybe if we met when I was a little less damaged and you were a little less perfect, We could have worked out? Maybe the timing is off. I know you think I am pushing you away because I don’t love you, I wish you knew how wrong you are. You deserve better. I know you don’t think you do. I know your self-esteem was shoved out of you in years of having another person use their words to contradict yours, and hearing nothing but cold, hard words from someone who means so much to you until their words words became a mantra on your soul and you can’t believe my words now because of it. you will call yourself trash,you call yourself broken, you will point desperately at the ones who did this to you and feel no one hears, yet you think that’s because you don’t deserve to be heard. You deserve better. By which to say, I mean you deserve to be happy. You deserve to not curl up and wonder why you can’t feel super loved. You deserve love, you deserve whatever happy ending you can craft in your mind. Sadly, this is where the story gets rough. Sometimes the happy ending we crafted up isn’t actually what we will get. The world is not likely to give it to you. The world can suck and it’s unfair and you’re scared and tired of feeling alone and you hate your body and you hate yourself and you hate feeling like you’re a failure. Sometimes you even see your successes as failures because they don’t feel like the right ones or they aren’t as successful as they should be. But before I say goodbye I want to remind you to please please please realize, no matter what happens you never stop deserving to be happy. You deserve to love yourself. You deserve to feel safe. You deserve so much more than you’ll ever realize you deserve. And I wish I could give this to you. But I can’t. But I will leave it as a parting note. I can only say it and hope it sinks in because my life would be different if you have never been in it.You are scared and you feel alone. And I’m sorry, I’m so sorry for not being able to change that.
—  And now, I guess this is goodbye

dear samantha
i’m sorry
we have to get a divorce
i know that seems like an odd way to start a love letter but let me explain:
it’s not you
it sure as hell isn’t me
it’s just human beings don’t love as well as insects do
i love you.. far too much to let what we have be ruined by the failings of our species
i saw the way you looked at the waiter last night
i know you would never DO anything, you never do but..
i saw the way you looked at the waiter last night

did you know that when a female fly accepts the pheromones put off by a male fly, it re-writes her brain, destroys the receptors that receive pheromones, sensing the change, the male fly does the same. when two flies love each other they do it so hard, they will never love anything else ever again. if either one of them dies before procreation can happen both sets of genetic code are lost forever. now that… is dedication.

after Elizabeth and i broke up we spent three days dividing everything we had bought together
like if i knew what pots were mine like if i knew which drapes were mine somehow the pain would go away

this is not true

after two praying mantises mate, the nervous system of the male begins to shut down
while he still has control over his motor functions
he flops onto his back, exposing his soft underbelly up to his lover like a gift
she then proceeds to lovingly dice him into tiny cubes
spooning every morsel into her mouth
she wastes nothing
even the exoskeleton goes
she does this so that once their children are born she has something to regurgitate to feed them
now that.. is selflessness

i could never do that for you

so i have a new plan
i’m gonna leave you now
i’m gonna spend the rest of my life committing petty injustices
i hope you do the same
i will jay walk at every opportunity
i will steal things i could easily afford
i will be rude to strangers
i hope you do the same
i hope reincarnation is real
i hope our petty crimes are enough to cause us to be reborn as lesser creatures
i hope we are reborn as flies
so that we can love each other as hard as we were meant to.

— 


Jared Singer, “An Entomologist’s Last Love Letter”

I saw Singer perform this piece at a random poetry slam in New York and it gave me chills.

A Crimson Storm Hiding a Heart of Gold (Closed)

There was a sudden heavy silence when Jameson asked why Smiles tormented him, and why they both just didn’t try to get along.
{Why would I ever be nice to my prison warden. He never lets me out, he won’t even give me a chance, even while he’s sleeping now. It’s becoming harder and harder to actually try controlling our body.}
“Well how would you feel if someone always kept trying to control your body?! Plus, last time I let you do anything all you did was go out and literally just destroy people’s property.” Miles suddenly shouted, a stern anger in his voice.
{How I would feel? You mean how I feel all the time already?! I share this body too, I don’t just want to be a spectator anymore!}
The voice shouted, and eventually just started to make a grumbling sort of noise, trying to focus on the other’s words, but the urge to try and fight for control over Miles, or maybe even Jameson as they resonated, was becoming more and more tempting.
{Sounds like you don’t like visitors much then, eh?}
strongtwinblade