i would catch a grenade for you

And now I would like you all to consider the turian boyfriend™ meeting Shepards high school ex. You know, the douchy kind that loves mansplaining and belittling.

Imagine Shepard getting a message on her private terminal that he wants to catch up. Garrus calibrating slightly slower than usual, listening to her read it out. And oh * pulls out rifle * that guy *pulls out pistol * the one you went to the thing with * pulls out shotgun * prom, right? * puts on armor * Sure, I’d love to meet him. * packs a grenade * maybe have dinner together and * packs another grenade * you know, talk. * packs third grenade * He must be such a nice fellow *packs normandy thanix cannon*

anonymous asked:

Support!reader who has a crush on cuties of your choice that are of a different class, but they're nervous about making a move because "oh I'm just a medic. I'm not nearly as impressive as they are"

(Let’s go withhh…Hanzo, D.Va, and Junkrat!)


Genji quietly watched as you watched Hanzo, waiting for the moment when you’d get up and actually say something to him.

“It has been a long time since someone has expressed romantic interest in my brother,” he pointed out.

“Oh, I don’t doubt it,” you sighed wistfully.

“And he often looks lonely after missions,” he continued.

“Yeah, I’ve noticed,” you mumbled, eyes still glued to the archer.

“…So!” Genji finally groaned.

“So what?” you snapped, finally turning to him.

“Go talk to him!”

“T-Talk to him?” you stuttered nervously, “No way, th-there’s no way he’d want to talk to me. Especially since he’s busy with those targets…”

“He’s always busy with targets,” Genji rolled his eyes from behind his visor, “He doesn’t need the extra practice, he just does it when he’s lonely or troubled,”

“It’s nice to watch…” you smirked a little, watching as his muscular arms drew back the bow.

“[Name!]” Genji brought you back to reality, “Why don’t you go talk to him. You’ve had this crush on him since you came to Overwatch, but you never make a move!”

“Well that’s because–I mean–he’s a sharpshooter, a sniper, a strong warrior of Overwatch! And I’m just a support unit…I hop in and out of fights to help people, relying on my teammates to protect my sorry butt…”

Genji sighed, “So you’re intimidated? Is that it?”

“…Yeah…” you admitted.

“[Name], I’m an offense unit,” he said bluntly, “You weren’t afraid to approach me,”

“Th-this is different,” you stammered, “I didn’t have a crush on you,”

“[Name], none of us think you’re a useless addition to the team. We all value our support units, especially you,” Genji explained softly, “Nobody would ever belittle you for your support status, especially Hanzo. I think he admires those who can save lives so easily,”

You shifted uncomfortably as you thought it over. It was just that grim, dead-set face Hanzo always had. He seemed like he never had time for anyone much less little support units.

“We are defined by who we are, not what we are,” Genji concluded, sounding just as zen as his master.

Taking a deep breathe, you nodded, “Ok, you’re right! I need to stop telling myself I’m not good enough! I-I just…need to go over to him…a-and say something,”

“That’s the spirit!” Genji cheered.

“Well go on,” he urged.

“I can’t. My feet feel like they’re stuck!” you whimpered nervously.

“Just get out there already!” Genji laughed, giving you a nudge towards his brother.

Stumbling forward, you watched the archer hit another bull’s-eye, pulling another arrow to his bow. Cautiously, you came up next to him, watching him release the arrow and hit another target in the center.

“Hello, [Name],” he said gruffly, still totally concentrated on his work, “Is there something you need?”

He looked so scary and powerful! Why were you trying to waste his time?! Aaagh! Nervously, you glanced back towards Genji for some kind of help. The cyborg just gave a little “go on” gesture.

“A-Actually…” you mumbled anxiously, “I–uh–came to watch your target practice a-and um take notes! Yeah, my…my aim really i-isn’t very good so um I mean yours is! So I thought I-I could learn a thing or–uh–two from you…I mean as long as that doesn’t bother you, you know…”

Hanzo suddenly stopped midway from grabbing another arrow. Then his eyes slowly turned toward you, looking more surprised than usual.

“You…want me to teach you?” he asked with a hopeful look in his eye.

“Ummm…” you glanced back to Genji who was nodding furiously and giving you a thumbs-up, “Y-Yes! If it’s not too much trouble!”

“Of course not,” Hanzo shook his head, picking up a practice bow and handing it to you, “I’ve noticed your aim in battle. I was hoping you would try to fix it,”

You cringed. Were you really that bad at hitting your targets?

“But I am glad you sought me out to help you,” he gave a slight smile, “I was afraid you had been avoiding me,”

“Avoiding? Heh, nah o-of course not!” you giggled.

“Support units seem to be so nervous around me,” he said in a ponderous tone, “I was beginning to worry that I had been frightening you away…”

“No, no, it’s not th-that!” you tried to tell him, “I’m shy by nature, I promise!”

He tapped his finger to his chin a few moments before saying, “Very well, let us begin with your stance,”

Your whole face grew hot as Hanzo suddenly stepped behind you, wrapping his arms around yours and guiding your hands into the right positions. Then he nudged your foot with his and instructed you to tighten your grip. You glanced back at Genji again, who looked like he was laughing from behind his visor.


You always admired D.Va so much. She fearlessly flew into every fight with her meka, disrupting the enemy’s ranks and wreaking havoc. Then just when they thought they had taken down her meka, she’d shout “nerf this!” and blow them all to smithereens! You thought she was simply amazing and almost made you wish that you were a tank unit. But you were just a support unit, sticking back with the offense units and keeping them supplied with shields and heals.

But one day, during a really rough battle, D.Va started calling on her comm link for extra backup: things like more firepower, defense, and a support unit to keep her going. No other supports responded, so you were the one to answer her call and move to the front lines. It was scary as all hell up there, explosions and bullets flying, yet Hana kept her cool like it was another day at the arcade!

“Thanks for coming to help guys! Their snipers are really annoying but their offense won’t let me get close to them! Could you guys keep their offense busy?” she explained, then turned to you, “And [Name], could you pocket heal me? My meka’s gonna fall apart without your heals!”

“U-Uh–yes! Yes ma’am!” you piped almost like a robot.

“Hee hee!!” Hana snorted, “Who’s ma’am? I’m D.Va, silly!”

You felt a little blush form on your face as she laughed her bubbly laugh.

“R-Right, D.Va…” you muttered.

“Let’s mooove out!” she cheered excitedly, taking off with her boosters.

Somehow you were able to keep up, steadily healing her as she disrupted the snipers, disarming them and booping them out of their nests. It was really hard at times; sometimes her meka’s health would go dangerously low even as you healed her all you could. But luckily, her meka never got wrecked…well until she wrecked it herself.

“Snipers eliminated!” she reported happily into her comm link, then looked back to you, “Watch this, [Name]!”

With that, she boosted her meka into the air, ejecting at the last second and sending it into self-destruct mode. It turned into a big ball of light, soaring through the air and eventually landing in the enemy base with a KABOOM! You watched awe-struck as the whole sky lit up and the base flew into a thousand pieces.

“Woohoo! Bonus points!” Hana cheered.

“That was amazing…” you breathed.

“Yeah, I guess it was,” she shrugged, “But I couldn’t have done it without you, [Name]. Your healing was what really kept me going!”

You blushed again, staring down at your shoes bashfully, “I mean, I wasn’t that great. Nothing different from what I usually do…”

“Hey!” she grinned, taking you by the hand and leading you back to your own base, “Do you wanna hang out sometime?”

“H…Hang out?” you couldn’t believe someone as famous and strong as D.Va was asking you to “hang out!”

“Uh-huh, you know that thing that people do when they wanna spend more time with each other?” she chuckled at you.

Your expression slowly dropped, remembering your place.

“But…you’re a tank unit, and I’m a support unit…” you mumbled.

“Yeah? Why is that important?” she shrugged.

“Because I’m just a support unit,” you admitted, “Don’t you want to hang out with someone cooler like another tank or attack unit?”

“Nope!” she smiled, “I wanna hang out with you, [Name]! Units don’t matter! They’re just dumb, stuffy titles,”

With that she slung an arm over your shoulder and pulled you close, making you stiffen up. You were so close to her! She smelled like bubblegum and new car…

“So what do you want to do? We could play video games or go to the arcade or go shopping–ooh! Do you like ice cream? I know this great place that gives me free…”

She’d be talking all the way back to base.


“Oi! I need healin’!” “Where’s my heals?” “Oi! Healer, over here!”

Why did you have to fall for a guy who treated supports like servants? Why did he only ever call you “Healer” or “Doc?” He was so tall and lanky, yet muscle-y at the same time, with a cute laugh and an outgoing attitude. Junkrat was everything you looked for in a guy, despite your friends saying you were crazy for it.

But you never once made a move. It always seemed like an arsonist would never have any time for a support unit, especially when he seemed to think they were so unimportant to the team. A lot of the other support units would get bad at him for his rude tone around him. They’d punish him with a smack on the head or a “no heal” policy for at least one battle. Some supports had given up on healing him altogether–he was the one who’d accidentally drop grenades on himself, after all.

But you just couldn’t keep yourself from healing him. It meant you got to admire him up close…even if you never said anything to him. Sometimes he’d even give you a little “Thanks, mate!” But as far as you were concerned, Jamison would never like a support unit. It wasn’t until the end of one of your missions that you were proven wrong.

“Hooly dooly, that was some fight!” Junkrat marveled at the wreckage as his hair smoked.

“No kidding,” you huffed as you tried to catch your breath, “I thought for sure we were gonna lose the point,”

“Same! We were the only ones on it!” he laughed, “I kept waitin’ for them to punt me off, but you kept me goin’!”

“Oh, yeah whatever,” you shrugged as you flopped down on the ground exhausted, “Well you did all the hard work,”

“Me? You were the one dodgin’ all those bullets and givin’ me all them buffs!” he pointed out as he sat down next to you, “I wouldn’t’ve been able to hold the point if it weren’t for you!”

A small blush crept its way onto your face, but you quickly shook your head and waved your hand dismissively.

“No, I wouldn’t have survived it if it weren’t for you blowing up anyone who came close to me.”

Seriously. Any flanker who’d try to sneak up on you would get a “Not my healer, you bitch!” from Junkrat.

“Well at least we can admit we work well together, eh?” he chuckled.

“Sure…” you mumbled bashfully, “Why not?”

“Eh c’mon, why ya hidin’ yer face now?” he smirked as he took your chin and gently guided it toward him.

“I-I’m not!” you squeaked in shock.

You hadn’t expected him to do that! His fingers felt all sooty and calloused…

“Yeah you are!” he sang.

“Sh-shut up…” you pouted, pulling away.

“Oi, why can’t ya just accept the complement?” he whined.

You crossed your arms, “Because I know you don’t mean it. You don’t care about support units in the slightest, Jamison,”

“The hell I do!” he retorted, “Well, only the good ones, that is,”

You gave him a glare and he put up his hands in defense, “I get it, I get it, you support-y types don’t like me. But you’re one of the only good ones on the team! You actually heal me and stick by me unlike all the other pricks who up and leave me for being ‘rude.’”

“But you, [Name], you’re a healer I can lean on!” he grinned, “ya’ve never let me down! That’s what I like about you!”

That’s what he…liked about you? Your face went red as you processed his words, looking like you had seen a giant spider.

“So…you don’t hate support units?” you asked.

“Hate ‘em? Nah!” he cackled, wrapping an arm around your waist and pulling you close to him, “Just drongos who don’t give me the time of day!”

Slowly, a smile appeared on your lips as you melted into him, letting him hold you closer. Jamison was a prickly guy and hard to get close to, and you always thought you’d never get very far with him, but all that time you had spent around him had been one big step towards knowing the real him.

–Mod Sirana

A Stake Through the Heart

Originally posted by vd-gifs

Jeremy Gilbert x Reader(Vampire)

Requested by: Anonymous 

                 You held his hand, tightly and you never wanted to let go. Jeremy was the one constant in your life, the one thing you still had to look forward to was Jeremy. 

                 “What are you thinking about?” He questioned. He must have took note of your long silence and realized that you were in deep thought. You smiled at him as you were deciding rather to tell him the truth or lie. You went for the truth. 

                    “Just you.” You said with confidence. Surprisingly it didn’t sound as weird as you thought it would. He just laughed and untangled his hand from yours and threw his arm over your shoulder. 

                  “You wanna go back to my place?” He asked with a grin on his face. 

                  “You mean the Salvatore’s.” You teased. He couldn’t help it that his sister went crazy and burnt his house down, but you knew how much he disliked staying with them. When you poked fun at him it was cute, but when anyone else did it to him it was a problem. 

                   “yeah, whatever.” He rolled his,”Hey I forgot something inside. Wait here.” He kissed your forehead  then walked back into the grill. 

              You stood outside, just watching people walk by. You wondered how Humans claimed to be so smart, but yet they could walk by a monster such as yourself, and know nothing of it. The world of normal people confused you,even when you were a human you never understood why people did the things they did or acted in the stupid ways they did. It was a good thing Jeremy couldn’t be classified as normal because you were not sure you’d like him as much if he was.

          As you waited you suddenly got whiff of the strong smell of blood, and a lot of it. You looked around trying to find the source, but found nothing. You suddenly heard a sharp female scream come from a ally next to the grill. You darted over to the location as fast as you could. The sight you saw would haunt your dreams. 

           A tall man, muscular man with long brown hair, stood in front of a girl no older than 18. She had blood pouring from a wound in her head, her wrists were bound behind her back and her shirt was covered in blood, from wounds on her torso. The man turned to you with a sick grin on his face. “Just the one I wanted to catch.” You turned to run, but when you did a vervain grenade  went off causing you to stumble backwards and scream out in pain. You then felt a sharp pain in your neck and the world around you went black. 

         The stinging of the ropes was the first thing you felt. The ropes had been soaked in vervain, no doubt. You ignored the pain and quickly began to take in your surroundings. The room was dark, but you could smell mold and mildew so you assumed you were in a warehouse or a garage. Your observing was cut short by a punch in the face. You struggled against to ropes and yelled at the man in front of your face. “Let me guess, you’re a hunter.” You spat. You assumed that Stefan and Damon had somehow managed to get rid of all the things, but this guy had to be a hunter. 

        “Shut up.” He plunged a stake into your leg. You cried out in pain. How was it less then 30 minuets ago you were talking to Jeremy and having fun, but now you had a stake in your damn leg. 

            “What the hell, do you want?” You were tired of the games, if he was going to kill you, you wished he would just do it. 

              “I want to watch you suffer and die.” He said without remorse. 

              “Wow very blunt.” You said sarcastically. 

           He shoved another steak into your body, but this time it was in your torso. “Next one goes in your heart.” The man said twisting the stake in his hands. At this point the pain of the stakes, and the roped was just to much. The world around you began to go black again, there wasn’t much you could do to stop it. 

            Moments before the world went black, light burst into the room and all you could see was shadows. You heard sounds of fighting, but your head was too fuzzy for you to focus on anything.  

           You felt a pair of hands on your face and you were to weak to struggle against them. “Hold still Y/N.” It was Jeremy. He pulled the stakes from your body, but the pain from that alone was enough to send the world into darkness. 

           When you woke up you were in the Salvatore house. You saw Stefan sitting beside you. “Where is Jeremy?” You croaked. Your body felt fine considering the beating you took, one of the perks of being immortal. 

         “He will be back.”  He said calmly. He tossed you a blood bag and you drank it down without thinking twice. 

          “Is she up?” you heard Jeremy’s voice come from the hallway.When his eyes met yours you could practically see the happiness overflowing from him. You ran to him and wrapped your arms around his large form. You were back in the arms of the one person that made you happy. “Don’t get kidnapped again please.” He laughed. 

        “I cant make any promises.” 

slycookiemonster  asked:

But Isaac's s/o giving Isaac random odd compliments at weird times. like they'd say to Isaac 'if someone threw a grenade at you, not only would I catch it for you, I'd throw that shit back. Nobody throws a grenade at you and gets away with it' after he gets a box of cereal for them in the morning because Isaac's s/o is like 5'3" and his face is literally the human representation of ??? But he's also a blushing mess and just giggles and pats his s/o's head

ok but his s/o is me bc i’d do that 

except i’m taller

anonymous asked:

Not only would I catch a grenade for you, I'd toss that crap back. No one throws a grenade at you and gets away with it.

please don’t kill people that is bad

markuvarakivargosemo500thge-blog  asked:

Cause what you don't understand is I'd catch a grenade for ya (yeah, yeah) Throw my head on a blade for ya (yeah, yeah) I'd jump in front of a train for ya (yeah, yeah) You know I'd do anything for ya (yeah, yeah) Oh oh, I would go through all this pain, Take a bullet straight through my brain, Yes, I would die for ya baby,


anonymous asked:

okay so i know you love a harry potter stucky au so maybe u can answer this. my friend is adamant about steve being a gryffindor and bucky being slytherin but i think steve is hufflepuff and bucky is slytherin. your thought?

I’ve made posts about this a lot before but I’m gonna go into more detail in this answer bc I got time to kill before Eyewitness starts. So buckle up, this is gonna be a long, but hopefully interesting, one.

You gotta go outside of the stereotypes of the houses, bc like if you just look at the stereotype of Slytherin’s being “dark and edgy” and Ravenclaws being “pompous know it all’s”, then neither of these make sense. But I feel like those stereotypes are massive misinterpretations of the houses. ANYWAY, moving on.

The traits most present in a Ravenclaw, are curiosity, a desire to learn, a thirst for knowledge. Bucky was a smart guy, who on his last night in town for a while, took Steve and the girls to a science convention and stood there in wonder as he saw the future happening in front of him. Bucky’s file says he was fluent in German even before the war, and he doesn’t come from a German family, so he must have learnt it himself. Ravenclaw’s are also the least likely to initiate conflict, and from what we’ve seen of Bucky, not The Winter Soldier, he doesn’t want to fight, he doesn’t want conflict, he’s only in one to remove Steve from one or if his life literally depends on it. Ravenclaw’s are the most open-minded of the houses, the house least likely to be influenced by what other people say and think, and we see that with the initial friendship between Steve and Bucky. The other kids didn’t want to give Steve the time of day, but Bucky didn’t give a fuck what the other kids were doing, he was making up his own mind, and he wanted to be friends with Steve. Ravenclaw’s are also associated with a love of astronomy and they’re connected with the element of air. Bucky as we saw, had an interest in sci-fi, so it’s not a stretch to assume he also had a fascination with space. And the air element is one of freedom, which i like in association with Bucky post-tws and into civil war. So yeah. Ravenclaw!Bucky is near and dear to my heart. 

Slytherin Steve. Pretend for a moment, that Slytherin’s aren’t massively generalised in the franchise and fanbase (seriously JK, you’re telling me not one single Slytherin stood and fought in the Second Wizarding War? They all hid in the dungeons? I call bullshit), let’s look at the traits of a Slytherin. Where Gryffindor’s can often have a desire for greatness and fame, Slytherin’s seek to be the best they can be. Not for recognition, but for their own knowledge that they couldn’t have done any better. And that’s Steve. He doesn’t want any of the recognition that comes with being Captain America, he’s said it himself, it makes him feel like a dancing monkey. He just wants to know that he has done all that he could in every endeavour he makes. Slytherin’s often are quite risk-orientated, and don’t take too much notice of caution. Which, excuse me @ Steve Rogers, jumping on grenades, jumping into enemy territory, crashing a plane into the ice, jumping from a plane without a parachute, jumping from the helicarrier without a parachute just hoping Sam would catch you. Slytherin’s are also often confrontational, especially if they think they’ve been wronged, and they won’t back down until some sort of agreement is come to. To which I say, Hi, have you met Steve? They’re also cunning, and aren’t above underhand tactics to get to what they want, for example, Steve wanting desperately to be in the Army and lying multiple times on enlistment forms (which is illegal), in the hopes that eventually he’d get approved. Gryffindors tend to be very black and white and no shades of grey. If the higher ups tell you that something is right, then it’s right, if they tell you it’s wrong then it’s wrong. Whereas Slytherin’s care a lot more about their own internal moral compass. If someone is telling them something is right but it doesn’t sit right with them, then they’ll oppose it. Slytherin’s aren’t so much driven by societal rules, and more their own rules, and that’s true of Steve. Also, Gryffindor’s tend to be more individualistic people, and Slytherin’s tend to be more group orientated, and that’s true of Steve. He does well on his own but he’s better in groups, like in the Howlie’s, and then when he sorta creates a new group for himself with Sam and Natasha. And of course with Bucky at his side. Steve is a character that has traits that overlap both houses, in the same way that Harry did. But I think whereas Harry sat there and begged not to be put in Slytherin bc of what he’d been told about the house, Steve wouldn’t care, he’d go in Slytherin if it was going to help him be the best he could be, which is precisely why I think he is a Slytherin. 

this went on more than i was planning so, tl;dr - I will go to the grave with my Ravenclaw!Bucky and Slytherin!Steve headcanons.

anonymous asked:

Hi! I'm writing a story about a kingdom that's loosely based off medieval times, but it's got some aspects that are more advanced... My question is: is it realistic to write bombs into the story? Like, bombs that are so explosive that it would cause a forest to catch fire? And if I do include bombs, what does that mean for other weaponry/war instruments?

You said it’s loosely based on the Middle Ages, so if you want to include bombs, you can. Explosives in the form of cannons have been used in Europe since 1262 (in Spain). It wasn’t until Crécy (1346) that the use of cannons became widespread. Grenades/bombs were first used in Europe in about 1437, but they certainly weren’t strong enough to blow up an entire forest.

As for how it’ll affect your story:

  • Castles and other large stone buildings will become worthless because the bombs can easily and quickly blow apart walls
  • Troop formations and supply trains will be spread out to prevent too many being taken out in one hit
  • Plate armor will either go more extreme or become irrelevant (as it did IRL) because it can no longer protect the wearers
  • Longbows will become extinct, since bombs can take out more people at a distance. Longbows will go extinct faster if someone puts bombs in a trebuchet.
Let's Talk About Hirosue Sora (How A Favourite Character Can Cause Unnecessary Feelings)

In line with a ‘Let’s Talk About Izuki Shun’ post I had done, I was thinking heck, I might as well do one for Sora. Since, well, I’m pretty much as lame when it comes to Sora, like I am about Izuki. (How lame, you ask? Hella.)

Sora is my favourite character in the Voltage Inc. universe. Just getting it out there, if it wasn’t totally obvious. Also, you can dismiss me as a crazy kook defending Sora’s character in this post; I don’t really care, I just wanted to type this out.

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