i worry more about things out of my control than in my control

Story 215: Cultural Exchange

The human steps onto the station from her shuttle, and walks into the scanner.  It flashes - no weapons.  I pity her, though there’s nothing I can do for her.  By tomorrow she will be a slave the same as me; the Gaunvans collect ambassadors like trophies.
“Hello there!  Amanda Thorn, ambassador for the Empire of Humanity.  You’re a Ixian, correct?”
Mimicking human body language, I nod my head.  "That’s correct.  Ix Malasan.  It is an honor to meet you.“
She smiles, reminding me again that she has somehow modified herself to breathe atmosphere suited to the Gaunvans rather than wear a respirator like myself.  Other than that she appears to be a standard human, something I am led to believe is less and less common as they pursue the bizarre compulsion humans have to alter their bodies.  Changing hair color, adding pigments to their skins in patterns and pictures, growing long tails or ears that mimic other species from their planet.  No other known species tampers with their bodies like this.
“Not to be undiplomatic, she says, "but the Gaunvans enslaved your people.  Why are you here?”
“We… reached a mutually beneficial agreement.  We would have lost in combat and been eliminated, so we chose to preserve what we could of our culture.  The Gaunvans are not naturally skilled at diplomacy, so they bring me along to assist and to show that peace can be made.”
She nods.  "Understood.  I can respect that choice.  How much freedom do you have, personally?“
Smart of her, to start planning for her future. "A fair amount.  I have free reign on the ship when we are in transit.  At the homeworld I have reasonably comfortable quarters.”
“Have you ever met the Empress, or…?”
“Oh, no.  No, while on the homeworld I am confined to my chambers - but they’re quite spacious.”
“Shame.  Okay, plan ‘A’ then.  Let’s get this over with.”

Despite my attempt at encouraging diplomacy, the Gaunvan commander starts with threats.  I don’t know why I bother.  He looms over the human, chitinous plates almost black in the dim light.  His pod of six is posted around the room, for show more than for actual security since she followed orders and came alone and unarmed.  "Failure to surrender will bring the full wrath of our army upon you.  Humanity will be crushed, and wiped from the universe.“
To her credit, she looks very calm.  "We live in a post-scarcity society.  Bloody conquest just seems silly, doesn’t it?”
“It is for the glory of Gaun!”
“Well, I’m not prepared to get into a religious debate with you,” she says, “since I doubt there’s anything I can do to change your mind.  Since you’re committed to this course of action, what are you willing to offer if we surrender?”
Now he goes back on script.  Maybe I am getting through to him a little?  He talks about the benefits of being enslaved, mainly the protections for up to twelve designated culturally historical sites.  They’ve been mostly good on their word on my homeworld, though they did use the area just outside of the Hahhn Memorial as a waste dump.

She nods as she listens.  There was a part of me that was worried she would argue, because the humans are somewhat childlike.  They don’t understand the horrors of war.  Certainly they fought in the past, but the last time they had to battle was more than two of their generations ago, so these ones have all grown up coddled and soft.  They play games with each other instead, silly competitions.  They make art, and play pretend, and alter their bodies for fun.  They don’t have weapons anymore, and wouldn’t know how to use them if they did.
“Well then,” ambassador Thorn says, “this is about what I expected.  On behalf of humanity, I would like to formally reject this offer.”
Oh no.  Foolish humans.  The galaxy will miss your innocence.  The commander makes an excited clicking noise, looking forward to combat.  He reaches a blade-tipped hand towards ambassador Thorn, but hesitates as every device in the room bleats out an alert - we’ve all lost communications with the outside.

Like one of the dances humans do, she gracefully pivots around while taking his hand.  She ends up close to him and places her other arm against his thorax, then… oh gods. Gods, what… she’s ripped his arm off.  It’s not possible.  The commander is clearly thinking the same thing, staring in mute shock at his dripping limb.
“I’d like to extend a counter-offer,” she says, and flips the arm around before jamming the bladed end into his neck.  The warriors around the room are fidgeting, uncertain.  They haven’t been told to attack, and don’t want to dishonor their commander by intervening in a fight with such a small creature.  She’s still holding the commander’s severed arm in his neck, but she rotates and heaves, lifting him off the ground with it for a moment… and then his head pops off, landing squarely on the conference table.  She allows the corpse to slide to the ground, and straightens her clothes as if they aren’t covered in ichor.

I don’t understand.

The warriors, now with no orders at all, finally act.  She smiles as they come for her, I suppose because she has done her duty to send this powerful message of resistance.  She can die in peace.  Or… no… She’s killing them.  She’s smiling because this is fun for her.  Though they’re partly killing themselves; if there had been two of them, prepared, strategic, they might have prevailed.  Watching six panicked fighters get in each other’s way while trying to stop a smaller, faster, and somehow impossibly stronger foe is almost hypnotic.  At least one is killed by the stab of a friendly lance due to pure confusion.  It’s over faster than I would have thought possible, severed limbs strewn across the room.  I’ve got some fluids splashed across my clothing.  Only one yet lives, and he is retreating.  She seems to be allowing it.

She follows behind, holding a lance.  The wounded and scared warrior scurries down the hallway towards his ship, looking back behind him as he goes.  She’s just… walking.  Calm.  And for some reason I’m following.  The last Gaunvan reaches the airlock and the second he enters his code she throws the lance - throws it! - and spears him.
“Come on, we’re stealing their ship.”  She says it like this is the most normal thing in the world.
“There are thousands more on board!  Thousands!  Almost all warrior caste!”
She smiles again, and keeps walking.  I see errors on the screens that we pass, messages indicating communications have been lost.  They can’t tell anyone what is happening here.  Even the communicators within the ship are on nodes rather than being wired, so the warriors at one end of the vessel won’t be able to coordinate with the other end.  Do they even know they’ve been boarded?
“How?”

We enter the bridge after she kills a handful of other guards with ease.  They’re too shocked by her presence to act in time.  Once the door are sealed and she is working on the control systems she starts talking to me again.
“Well, you know, we do like to be prepared.”
“But you… you ripped his arm off.”
“Yeah, that was super satisfying.”  She looks at me appraisingly.  "Oh, come on.  Is it really that surprising?  You knew we were into changing ourselves, right?  Being strong enough to pop an overgrown bug’s forelimb off isn’t rocket science.“
"Your people are so peaceful…”
“Oh, sure, most of them.  But we did that, too.  Tweaked ourselves over the years to decrease aggression and some of our tribalistic tendencies, increase empathy… all stuff that can be undone if needed.  Though for a good cause even the nicest of us can squish a bug or two.”
“You bond with Ry'ling devourers!”
“Those are the big fuzzy guys that look like cats, yeah?  Those guys are adorable!  But… look, liking some things that could kill us doesn’t mean we’ll sit back and get enslaved.  We didn’t put up with it well when we enslaved each other, and we certainly aren’t going to go for it now that we’re… finally… on the same page about slavery being unacceptable.  It was, uh, a longer time than we like to admit before the last hold-outs were convinced of that one.”

I can feel the ship un-dock.  We’re moving.  "What about all the warriors on board?  They’ll break through the doors eventually!“
"Not according to this control panel here.  Take a look.”
It says there’s no atmosphere in the rest of the ship.  Life signs are negative on all but two of the warriors, presumably the only ones that got to their suits in time.  She disabled all the safety measures, somehow.  She just killed… I check the life signs readout again to confirm the number… three thousand, six hundred, and fourteen soldiers.  Wait, how is it tracking that unless… “Are communications back up?”
“Yeah, I’m calling some friends.  The military is right around the corner, so to speak.”
“But Earth doesn’t have a standing military.”
She laughs.  Not just a little bit.  She’s actually doubled over for a moment, unable to catch her breath.  "Sweet Jeebus, you guys actually fell for that?  No standing military.  Have you read about us at all?“

Three ships appear seemingly out of nowhere, and one docks with the Gaunvan vessel.  Once the atmosphere is restored we head to the airlock to meet them, and I’m surprised by an entire platoon of Gaunvan warriors.  Speaking English.
"Okay boys, send your last goodbyes!  This is in all likelihood a one way mission.  Commander Thorn!  It is an honor to see you again, and might I say you look exquisite drenched in the blood of your enemies!”
She bows to him, blushing, and then salutes the Gaunvans.  Or… humans?  Can they change themselves this drastically?
“You’ve got two holed up in here somewhere.  Bridge is clear, have the techs bring the new brain on board.”
“New brain?”
She looks at me like she’s forgotten that I’m here, and then turns back to the others.  "Men, this is our new friend Ix Malasan who has just been liberated from his captivity.  He’s going to be helping with our intel.  Malasan, yeah, a new brain for the ship.  Once this vessel is cleaned up and back in service with a new crew we’ll be able to take it over whenever we want even if all of our boys get killed.  We cooked up a really sadistic AI for it.“
"But how do you know the protocols?  This was your first contact with the Gaunvans, they’ve never lost a ship anywhere near here!”
“No?  There wasn’t a mining colony disaster two years ago?”
“But that was just an accident… and you weren’t even involved in the war yet… and…”

The faux-Gaunvans have finished boarding.  The one that was talking to them before puts a bladed claw on ambassador - commander - Thorn’s shoulder.  "You coming with?“
"Naw.  Orders said I could only come if they allow ambassadors near extremely high value targets.  Malasan here says they don’t, so I need to wait for my next mission back on Earth.”
“It would have been nice having you with us, Thorn.  Well, maybe we’ll see each other again.  Suicide mission or not, I think I’ve decided to live through it.”
“Bold choice,” she says, and kisses him next to his lower mandibles.
He nods at me, then turns back to his men. “Okay everyone, we are now officially on the job.  And what is that job?”
In unison, they start chanting.

“FUCK! SHIT! UP!  FUCK! SHIT! UP!  FUCK! SHIT! UP!”

For a moment I nearly feel pity for the Gaunvans.  Nearly.  Commander Thorn leads me off of the ship, and I start thinking about what useful information I can provide the ‘harmless’ humans.  Fuck shit up, indeed.

6

I had promised a KiriBaku kid something like months ago, and tbh most of the reason why it took me this long is because I couldn’t pick between these two so?? In the end just have them both I guess - some info about them under cut, in case you wanna know more!!

Keep reading

supercorp fanfic masterpost

due to the shitfest that was comic con (except u katie mcgraff, u my main hoe) I’ve decided to post all my fav fics to boost the morale in this fandom bc even tho melhoohaa hurt my feelings i would die for supercorp
also, im VERY sorry to the people who keep asking for me to post this and its taken about 7 years, I’m just a busy lady ok
p.s. im a smut whore so ur welcome for a section dedicated for pure sin at the end


MULTI FICS
Giant by @coeurdastronaute
90k+, ongoing, this is my fucking FAV, lena and kara meet in high school but not a high school AU, and its super angsty and L O V E honestly. 

my youth is yours by @lynnearlington
182k+, ongoing, my other fucking favvvvv! literally marked my soul and id read this everyday if i could bc never in my life have i read a fic that made my heart hurt this much ily writer

you are the fire (and i’m gasoline) by @lenacorporations
80k+, completed, literally read this is a day and holy fuck THE BEST! pls go and read this if you haven’t. childhood au its so damn cute

It’s in the Stars (It’s been Written in the Scars/On our Hearts) by @homodramatica
201k+, ongoing, another fav!!!! seriously fucking read this now. its like angst and fluff and smut all wrapped up in a supercorp love fest and i fucking ride hard for this fic

Learning Control by FrostedLimits
24k+, completed, kara can’t control her powers in the bedroom and lena is more than happy to help, also periwinkle kryptonite is cool

Mercy by Rykeral
329k+, ongoing, literally the longest and also the SLOWEST burn of all time, like I’m talking slow but its got everything like angst, fluff, action and lenas just a fucking badass.

Paranoia Incarnated by @justmickeyfornow​​
86k+, ongoing, kara gets infected by this stuff and gets uber paranoid and needs to hear lenas heartbeat to calm down and lena doesn’t know karas supergirl and its super cute and angsty FUCKING READ THIS NOW EVERYONE I’m telling ya

Jealous of the way (you’re happy without me) by @blood-inthefields
17k+, ongoing, karas a jealous hoe but its super sad tbh

Supergirl In Training by @wtfoctagon
70k+, completed, if u haven’t read this are u even a supercorp fan?

the heiress, the girl of steel, and the man who fell to earth by @littlekbrother
66k+, completed, LISTEN HERE this is one of my favs and mon-el is actually a good character basically everything supergirl should actually be and you need to fucking read this.

They only lack the light to show the way by @jennysparksandtheauthority
45k+, ongoing, SUPER BABIES

Lipstick On Your Collar by Remyroo17
52k+, completed, lena and kara have a baby together and ITS SO GOOD

The Day Lena’s Earth Stood Still by SuperTweety
60k+, ongoing, kara is lenas assistant, she’s weirded out about aliens but then they make sweet love and its gAY

You’re Never Alone, Lena by HEDA_OWNS_MY_SOUL
79k+, ongoing, lenas a fucking badass and kara and lena love each other

You Wanna Be Friends Forever? I Can Think of Something Better by @myheartisbro-ken
93k+, ongoing, kara and lena just support each other so much i fucking love this fic

Breathe by @silent-rain91
114k+, completed, kara and lena broke up 6 yrs ago and kara finds out they have twins, kara also has a penis but its cool don’t worry guys, one big happy family and oh so much angst

Worlds Between Us by @lycanhood
38k+, completed, lena and supergirl are friends with benefits and angst ensues, also red k kara hello

At Least I Got You in My Head by @queenghostling
25k+, ongoing, this is the saddest thing ever tbh, lena self harms and lillian’s a fuckhead. lena and lucy for a little bit supercorp endgame apparently. TW for self harm and sexual abuse.

i’ll love you till my breathing stops by @poiperoi
41k+, ongoing, boarding school au, and karas just a big fat alien and its so cute.

Impeccable timing by @thatsgaydanvers
22k+, ongoing, lena gets preggers before meeting kara and kara is overprotective and cute af

The Liar Game by @ladyptarmigan
75k+, ongoing, slow burn uphill battle supercorp, still haven’t finished but I’m already hooked!!!! 

Invictus by @annien
43k+, ongoing, lena takes kara to an arcade and kara stripteases for lena and its cute ok

it’s easy (when i’m with you) by @falsealarm
17k+, ongoing, kara accidentally kisses lena and then they are horny little teenagers but also super fluffy idk its a good mixture ok

Protective Custody by @thatsalotofboobs
23k+, completed, lenas in protective custody with kara and its just a big gay sleepover and then they bang.

Not Afraid to Fall by @prettyaveragewhiteshark
38k+, completed, lena and supergirl are sex buddies and angst ensues bc kara and lena love each other also sky sex???

You Wanna Be Friends Forever? I Can Think of Something Better by @myheartisbro-ken
93k, ongoing, this is just a big gay slow burn and lenas just in love with kara and they are cute okay read it

In Rao’s Light by @letswreakhavoc
41k+, ongoing, lena makes a sex room and its just pure sin ur welcome

Red Earth & Pouring Rain by @automaticheartache​​
10k+, ongoing, karas on red k to admit her feelings for lena and its a mess but its a good mess

Super Crush by @dophroll
44k+, ongoing, young pure love help this is cute af, time skips and sin

Bite me… by @kassebaum
13k+, completed, kara makes kryptonite bracelets so she can bang lena

If you don’t love me, pretend (just for a few more hours)… by Khrat9
24k+, completed, kara and lena bang all the time and realise they love each other bc obviously

Restraint by DaniJayNel
17k+, completed, lena basically becomes a kryptonian and gets to finally bang kara at the DEO

Firsts by writerstealth
17k+, completed, supercorp love story told in a series of firsts!!!!!

Duality by @mssirey
36k+, completed, start is pure sin but gets fluffy, supergirl and lena have LOTS of sex and kara and lena love each other idk man its good

Three Days by Silent_Specter
42k+, completed, ANGST AND ACTION AND LOVE


ONE SHOTS
we are what we pretend to be by C_AND_B
kara and lena fake date but like who are they kidding

i’ve just seen a face (i can’t forget the time or place where we just met) by karalovesallthegirls
kara gets drunk and licks lenas neck a lot

In This World, And The Next by @stennnn06
KATIE MCGRATH READ THIS ALOUD AT COMIC CON GUYS, marriage proposal cute af

If the Suit Fits by @littlekbrother
lena knows about kara before she comes out as supergirl and designs her suit!!

I’ve Been Outed by SwanQueen4tw
karas outed as supergirl bc of a puppy

The more you know by @spaceman-earthgirl
lena accidentally tells alex she had sex with kara

It was her all along by @spaceman-earthgirl
alex sees texts on karas phone and tries to find out who it is

There for all to see by @spaceman-earthgirl
just realised how many fav one shots i have from this author so just go read everything she has really lol I’m not kidding you won’t be disappointed

Jealous by 8ounce
lenas jealous of mon-el and tries to make kara jealous with supergirl

Oopsie! by Emiko_Scarlet
lenas pregnant and get hurts and karas dramatic obvs

wonderful electric (cover me in you) by @falsealarm
fluff and smut, just read it its cute 


SIN SIN SIN
here we are, two helping hands by @falsealarm​​
I Can See You In The Dark by GreyPallet & Sperryjayne
you are everything (please touch me) by PerkyMetalhead
A Dream Reality by ManyaZorEL
Heatwave by yesverygoodallright
Unraveling by gentlesin
Not a Fantasy by wallofcrazy
hands-on approach by exprsslyfrbidden
not quite a damsel by blatant_sock_account
Thunderbolt by chooseredemption
Unavoidable Dreams by C_AND_B
40,000 feet by @kassebaum
All I Want by breakerone
Welcome home by Callmesnowy68
Snapping by freedombeats89
Not so secret by freedombeats89
need you by @icaruslena
That’s how you say thank you by @silent-rain91
Kara Danver’s Most Successful Press Conference by @pendragn
the one where they’re only friends by blatant_sock_account
The Unsuccessful Capture of a Luthor by @nevertobeships
Love & Nudes by loopt
This Place is a Shelter by @trashbb
Yellow and Green by yesverygoodallright

YOU ARE WELCOME AND I HAVE NO LIFE SO PLEASE DONT STOP WRITING THESE BC I LITERALLY SURVIVE OFF THESE TYSM <3333

Katara: It’s not magic. It’s waterbending, and it’s-
Sokka: Yeah, yeah, an ancient art unique to our culture, blah blah blah. Look, I’m just saying that if I had weird powers, I’d keep my weirdness to myself. 

So I wanted to talk a little about Katara, because I think we often focus on her grief for her mother, and forget her relationship to her culture, and her experience of the Southern Water Tribe genocide (unlike the Air Nomads genocide, which was for the greater part over after four big terrifyingly effective simultaneous strikes, this one took place over a long length of time - more than 40 years? 50? - and it wasn’t total, but it definitely was one. genocide = the deliberate and systematic extermination of a national, racial, political, or cultural group, fwiw)

(Kanna’s village - before and after)

All of the Southern water benders were exterminated or taken away to rot in prison (where they all died eventually except for Hama). Katara was born the only bender left in the whole South Pole. Then when she was eight years old, she survived a raid that was meant to kill her, but took her mother instead (she probably was too young to realize that, to her it must have been a question mark up until she met Yon Rha - gratuitous cruelty? Why her mother in particular? They took nothing else!).

So Katara from a young age had a double burden to bear: that of her mother, and the legacy of her bending (and she was shown as painfully aware of her situation and what it meant on both front). But here’s the thing: Katara could be a mother, she was naturally good at it, and her grandmother could teach her what she didn’t already knew. Her family and tribe demanded that of her, they needed her to be that for them (especially after her father and the rest of the men basically abandoned them). However, there was no one left to teach her how to waterbend - she had almost no hope of ever becoming a master without formal training, her brother thought it was silly and weird and let her know, her grandmother thought it was a waste of time. But she kept practicing, because she knew how important it was, to her and to her tribe, that she kept trying (as the only one left who could).

(…an ancient art unique to our culture, blah blah blah…)

(Of course she would obsess over that waterbending scroll)

When she gets to the North Pole, she meets Pakku, and with him the opportunity of finally becoming a true master. But because she is a girl, he judges her unworthy. He judges her, the only remaining southern waterbender, unworthy of carrying on their culture. The Fire Nation didn’t care about the gender of their prisoners, men and women - they all fought side by side for their freedom in the South, and they were all taken away to the last one, and killed to the last one. In the South, the women had the choice to learn how to fight, or be defenseless. And privileged master Pakku couldn’t possible realize the extend of what he was denying her in that moment.

Katara had to prove herself, she had to earn her right to these teachings. And if she had been less good or less stubborn or not Kanna’s granddaughter - well the North would have refused their sister-tribe the power to use their common cultural heritage to fight back against the nation that destroyed them.

(It’s sexist and terrible.)

Meh, thankfully, she was that good, stubborn, and Kanna’s granddaughter, and she did get to become a master.

Good.

But, of course, her story doesn’t end here, and wrt her culture, the next chapter is a much more traumatizing experience. In the Fire Nation, she meets another master. This time it’s an old woman from the South like her (“You’re a waterbender! I’ve never met another waterbender from our tribe!”), and she is, ah, more than willing to help her.

Look how happy Katara looks at the idea to learn from her in particular:

Katara: I can’t tell you what it means to meet you. It’s an honor! You’re a hero.
Hama: I never thought I’d meet another southern waterbender. I‘d like to teach you what I know so that you can carry on the southern tradition when I’m gone.
Katara: Yes! Yes, of course! To learn about my heritage… it would mean everything to me.

But when Hama starts her lesson, the techniques she teaches have been obviously developed with one goal in mind: survival in enemy territory. They can’t possibly have been invented in the South Pole, where water is abundant everywhere. They are deadly and cruel, and the damage they do to the environment leaves Katara sad and uncomfortable, but Hama waves that off as unimportant. It doesn’t matter, she doesn’t have the time to worry about flowers or beauty or nature. To her that peace and beauty is probably just an illusion anyway, a lie: years after her escape she is still living the war, and war is ugly and rotten and messy (her world is ugly and rotten and messy - this is her comfort zone).

The last technique she teaches Katara is bloodbending. She forces Katara to learn something she finds disgusting, repulsive (just like Hama was forced to learn?) by torturing her (Hama was tortured), by overpowering her, invading her, making her lose control over her own body, bending her blood (Hama herself is clinging to the last remain of control she managed to get back after rotting in prison for years), and finally by threatening to have the two people she cares most about in the world kill each other right under her eyes (Hama lost everyone too, she had to say goodbye).

(Katara: But, to reach inside someone and control them? I don’t know if I want that kind of power.
Hama: The choice is not yours. The power exists…and it’s your duty to use the gifts you’ve been given to win this war. Katara, they tried to wipe us out, our entire culture… your mother!
Katara: I know.
Hama: Then you should understand what I’m talking about. We’re the last Waterbenders of the Southern Tribe. We have to fight these people whenever we can. Wherever they are, with any means necessary!
Katara: It’s you. You’re the one who’s making people disappear during the full moons.
Hama: They threw me in prison to rot, along with my brothers and sisters. They deserve the same. You must carry on my work.)

And this, this, is the only truly southern waterbending Katara is ever going to learn. This is her tribe’s bending heritage, what’s left of it: blood, grief, suffering, hatred, loss of control over both your body and mind (because it’s terrible, but I think that’s what’s implied by the show: bloodbending makes you lose your mind. Hama’s only mean of regaining physical freedom ended up trapping her in another nightmare). Hama gifts her with a power she despises (but will use anyway in her darkest hour when she loses control) and a philosophy of violence and revenge.

Katara chose peace and forgiveness. As an adult, she will have bloodbending outlawed, she will become the greatest healer in the world, and she’ll teach her daughter, the next avatar, probably many others. These choices matter, and we should talk about them with that background in mind. Katara redefined her heritage - or rather she created a new one for herself: she refused the condition that was forced upon her (bloodbender) and ensured nobody could legally do to someone else what Hama did to her (and it’s implied this law is valid anywhere in the world). She transmitted Pakku’s warrior teachings, the ones she fought for, to the next generations (and did a great job of it!), but she also taught them how to heal, refusing to separate the arts as in Northern Water Tribe tradition - and healing was something she discovered by herself, that she felt was always a part of her. At that, she became the universally acknowledged best. Her legacy, despite everything that happened to her, will never be one of violence.

tl;dr: Katara is one of the strongest fictional characters ever created bye

anonymous asked:

Aliens reacting to someone with braces? Thanks!

The human problem was growing bigger at an alarming pace. Back when they first started travelling through space, most had viewed their efforts as cute. Some had even cheered them on from afar. Of course, that was before they realised what kind of creatures humans really are and what kind of planet they originate on. Before they knew what humans did for fun.

The humans as a whole hadn’t attacked yet, but it was only a matter of time before they gathered their forces. The Ktynarian species had to be prepared.

As a result, they had commandeered a human craft, and with eight Ktynarians to every human, they’d managed to gain control of the vessel and the horrible creatures within.

Unfortunately it was common knowledge that getting a fully grown human to talk was a near impossible feat. Fortunately, there were several younglings on the ship. The majority were younglings actually, which was a surprise. Upon further investigation it was revealed the ship was operated by a training facility of the category ‘school’.

After separating the humans into smaller groups to minimise the risks of organised resistance, Commander Yldrik picked one of the medium sized younglings to interrogate – having heard that the bigger posed a threat in size, but that the smallest were often quick and nimble

Yes, the medium sized one were surely the easiest to make a first attempt on. And if that failed, they still had a plethora of other humans to interrogate. One of them would surely give them some useful information.

Some of the humans were secreting some sort of fluid from their optical organs, some making noises the Ktynarians couldn’t identify, but instructing them to be quiet seemed to just make them more intent on making the noises. Deciding it would be best to leave xir soldiers to deal with it, Commander Yldrik turned xir focus to the youngling xe had selected.

“What is your objective,” xe asked. Getting straight to the point had seemed like the best method, but the human didn’t seem to comprehend.

“What?”

“What is your objective? What are you here to accomplish?” xe repeated, seemingly surprising the human. Perhaps they hadn’t expected to be confronted, or for the Ktynarians to be suspicious of them. Clearly the humans had underestimated them.

“Well, I mean, a B would be great, but I’d settle for a C too,” the human responded, something in their mouth gleaming slightly. Under different circumstances Yldrik would have paid it more attention, but xe was preoccupied deciphering what the human had said.

A bee was a creature from the humans’ home planet, and apparently vital to their ecosystem. A sea however, was a large body of a particular kind of water, and their planet seemed to be largely consisting of it. Why would they possibly want more of it?

“Why?”

“It’s not my best subject,” they said, elevating an upper part of their anatomy. Yldrik knew xe had been informed of the meaning behind the movement, but xe had finally noticed something different about the human’s teeth. Something worrying.

“Bare your teeth.” The human seemed surprised by the order, but complied after a brief hesitation.

The sight that met xem was terrifying, even for someone with as much experience as Yldrik.

“W-what are those?”

The human looked perplexed at first, but seemed to understand what xe was referring to fairly quickly.

“You mean my braces?” the human asked before baring their teeth further. A grin. At least that was what xe thought the action was named by the humans. “It’s just metal. You see, my mouth had too many teeth in it, so they got a bit out of order. Crooked and all, you know? So when I was about thirteen my parents took me to a dentist who basically attached metal to them to force them to stay in place. Cool, huh?”

The tone in which the human spoke did no justice to the horrors that laid in their words. They spoke as if they didn’t realise how terrifying this information was – no, come to think about it, they spoke as if they enjoyed the horrors they’d clearly been put through.

“And this was necessary for your survival?” xe asked, seeing no other reasonable explanation.

“No, no it’s just because it looks better,” the human said, repeating the elevation of an upper part of their anatomy. They did something else too, with an appendage of theirs, but Yldrik was done paying attention.

In record time, every single Ktynarian had vacated the ship, control of which had been returned to the humans. Fortunately their ship had a far higher maximum speed than the humans.

Their only chance at survival would clearly be to stay as far away from the humans as possible. If they attacked, the Ktynarians would have no other option than to flee. A species willing to do things like that to their own young – for aesthetic reasons no less – was not a species one wanted to go to war against.

Lucid Dreaming Masterpost

Originally posted by reckoner0

What is Lucid Dreaming?

Lucid dreaming is when you are in a dream but fully aware that you are in a dream, leading to you often being able to control the outcomes or certain aspects of the dream. You are able to live your fantasies and also are more likely to remember your dreams come morning.

With work Lucid dreaming can be improved into astral projection via sleep or dream walking where you can exit your dreams to enter the dreams of others or walk about the “dream plane”. Skilled lucid dreamers also often use their dreams for divination and problem solving due to how vivid they are and how it is easier to remember them.

Herbs for Lucid Dreaming: African Dream Bean, Blue Lotus, *Datura, *Mexican Dream Herb, Lavender, Mugwort, Rose Buds, Valerian Root, Wild Asparagus

Crystals for Lucid Dreaming: Albite, Angel Phantom Quartz, Danburite, Herkimer Diamond, Lazulite, Moonstone, Rhodonite, Scolecite

Foods for Lucid Dreaming: Almonds, Bananas, Cherries, Chicken, Kidney Beans, Lamb, Oats/Oatmeal, Pumpkin/Pumpkin Seeds, Rice, Soybeans and Tofu, Sunflower Seeds, Tomatoes, Turkey

Essential Oils for Lucid Dreaming: Lavender, Mugwort, Patchouli, Rose

Other things to achieve Lucid Dreaming:

  • Keep a dream journal and write in it regularly.
  • Interpret the meanings behind your dreams after recording them
  • Avoid caffeine, alcohol, and smoking cigarettes before bed
  • Keep a regular sleeping schedule
  • Sleep in complete darkness if possible
  • Meditate before going to sleep
  • Openly state before you go to bed “I will lucid dream tonight” and repeat this either out-loud or in your mind as you get ready for bed. When you lay in bed continue focused on that in your mind
  • Along with that before bed tell yourself, preferably in a mirror if it helps, that you will remember your dreams come morning
  • Do “reality checks” meaning in your dream check to see if you are dreaming. If you see mirrors, see if you can see the background behind you or if it is misty/blurry. If see a clock look at it, look away, then look back, often in dreams the time will change. This is the same for signs and street signs. You can also before going to bed mark up your hand with ink and in your dream look down and see if it is there still. If its not you know you’re dreaming. Look down at your feet, often in dreams they will seem oddly unfocused. If you see a bookshelf, see if any of the book titles are visible or repeat.

Okay, I know I am dreaming, now what do I do?

Well now you practice. It is rare to immediately be able to control your dreams completely. To gain full control you need to practice. Start small and take baby steps. Try hopping in place in your dream, see if you can make yourself hover for even just a second. Keep at it, try to float in place longer and longer with each jump. In time and with practice and patience you will be able to soar through your dreams one night and it’s easy from there. If you come across a locked door try opening it while saying out loud “this door is unlocked”. Keep at it, because hopefully you will be able to open it soon enough.

Start talking to the ‘characters’ in your dreams. Try to influence their behavior such as suggesting they do something. You can also approach a ‘stranger’ in your dream and see what happens if you state that you two are friends. If they start acting as if they know you and are indeed your friend, you know you have improved your control.

Take notes in your dream journal on these tests. Write down if they failed or succeeded and keep at it. With time you will be able to change things in your dreams with ease.

The Positives of Lucid Dreaming:

  • You can control your dreams! That is just awesome, you can live out things you can’t do in real life.
  • Prevent or stop nightmares, when you are lucid dreaming you can just tell whatever is causing you the nightmare to ‘fuck off’ and usually they will. Nightmares can be quickly changed into enjoyable dreams
  • From my personal experience and experiences of others, after a lucid dream you feel more awake and alive come morning, it’s almost energizing to wake up from
  • Its calming, I can relieve my stresses from the day and not worry about them in my dreams
  • You can attempt to solve your real life struggles in your dreams or making plans
  • Eventually you can work your way to Astral Travel and Dream Walking
  • Using your dreams for divination
  • Improve sleep, many people who lucid dream fall asleep faster and deeper than most people leading to them having improved sleep patterns and habits
  • For artists and story writers, dreams can really inspire you and help you test out your ideas
  • Deity communication, for those who do worship deities you can communicate or even interact with them in your dreams if you welcome them in.
  • Spirit and entity communication, just like deities lucid dreamers can interact with entities in their dreams by letting them in. Many lucid dreamers interact with their guides and guardians through dreams as well

Happy Dreaming everyone~

Darkiplier and Antisepticeye

Ok first of all, holy mother of fucks, @markiplier ‘s valentine’s day video was absolutely the best thing ever! (along with @therealjacksepticeye ‘s halloween video).

if you haven’t watch Mark’s video, I suggest you you go now before reading this post (if you actually even read it xD) because it might contain spoilers.

Ok so we now have physical proof of Darkiplier’s existence, just like Anti’s. I love how they both act alike with the glitches and all, but they’re still so different from each other. from what I saw with Jack and Anti, it seems like Anti fights Jack for control of the physical body. Anti was restless, he’d do anything and everything to take full control of Jack’s body, including killing Jack which is kinda what he did in the halloween video when he cut his throat. He just wanted freedom, and he has no problem in blaming us (the fans) for his actions towards Jack (“you all said my name”, “YOU” “its all your fault” “you all made this happen” “you could’ve stopped me… but you just watched as this happened” “now he’s gone forever”). He knows exactly what to say to make us feel guilty. that sounds an awful lot like a sociopath. I might be wrong but I just did some research (I wouldn’t be writing this without doing my homework ahah) and some of the traits are:

  • Repeated violations of the law
  • Pervasive lying and deception
  • Physical aggressiveness
  • Reckless disregard for safety of self or others
  • Consistent irresponsibility in work and family environments
  • Lack of remorse

you can see most of these behaviors in Anti. Antisepticeye is a sociopath.


now Darkiplier on the other hand…


from what I saw in mark’s valentine’s day video, Dark looked like he had more self control. he seemed awfully calm. he wasn’t trying to fight Mark for a chance of controling the body. he was waiting for Mark to actually let him in (”I’ve been waiting patiently” “he promised he would let me in again”) and this makes me think… Dark is strong enough to take over Mark’s body without actually attacking Mark the way Anti did with Jack. and Mark knows it. so he made a deal. he would let Dark get in from time to time, if he promised not to hurt anyone. obviously Dark wouldn’t keep that promise like we see in the 14 million subs video for example. now lets take a look at some of the psychopath traits:

  • Lack of guilt/remorse
  • Lack of empathy
  • Lack of deep emotional attachments
  • Narcissism
  • Superficial charm
  • Dishonesty
  • Manipulativeness
  • Reckless risk-taking

I don’t know about you but these scream Darkiplier to me. you can see how emotionally detached he is from us. he just wants to toy with our emotions. this is all but a game to him. and he doesn’t care about the consequences (”take your pick. anything of four different choices”, “and lets see how far down this rabbit hole really goes” “so take your pick. show me what you got”, “and maybe we’ll have a good date after all”). he gives us a sense of security and happiness(?) (”if dinner is what you want, then I can provide”, “and I can take you to wherever you’d like to go”), only to be crushed by a statement that makes us fear for our own life (”I can specially take you to places where you DON’T want to go”), leaving us on the edge. he makes us think he actually cares about us (”I’ve been waiting a long time to get some personal space between us”), when he actually just wants to hurt us (”THERE’S NOTHING YOU OR HE CAN DO TO STOP ME”, “youre never, ever going to escape me”).

and if you notice, after you’ve chosen who to kill, you’ll see that if you choose the left option, Mark looks so worried and empathetic over us, trying to reassure us… after all we just killed someone and he’s worried about us (compared to the Mark we’re left with, if you choose the right option). at the end, it turns out we killed the wrong Mark, and we’re left with Dark in front of us. for a second we believed we killed the right Mark, seeing how calm and not evil M(D)ark was acting towards us. that is manipulation. Dark made us believe we were safe now, that we made the right choice, only to crush that sense of safeness right when we were starting to get confortable and at peace (”oops… looks like you made the wrong choice”, “but now we’re going to be together…. forever”)

I strongly believe Darkiplier is a psychopath and Antisepticeye is a sociopath. they both act differently towards Jack and Mark and their fans, but at the same time, in a very similar way. I believe the reason Anti is so glitchy and Dark is so “HD quality” (xD) is because Anti forced his way into Jack and obviously thats gonna leave some damage, while Dark waited (im)patiently for his turn to take over the body.


I just want to congratulate @therealjacksepticeye and @markiplier for portraying these characters, made up by the fans, so unbelievably well, and thank them for taking their time to make something, created by the community, come true like this. you guys are amazing.


this is just my theory, if you disagree or have something to say, I’d be more than happy to hear your theories, but don’t be rude or anything.

also, if you read this giant post till the end, thank you so much for taking your time to do so :) sorry if this was a bit confusing xD 

________

edit: if you want a bit more input on their disorders, take a look at this post

please, I would love to hear your opinions on it

7:32 PM - Peter Parker

request -  queen. I love your writing. If you’re willing to do another peter Parker smut bc im full of sin and ur last one was so damn good, can u do one where u guys are friends and peter asks if he can eat u out “for practice” or something and he’s rly awkward about it ? if u don’t wanna do that or if u wanna change it in anyway that’s totally cool. thanks for sharing your word with the world, it’s amazing!!!

a/n - had to get around to writing my second smut fic on this blog and i hope it isn’t a flop like me!!! this is NOT a continuation of 11:57 PM, i just thought it was cool to name the smut fics a time bc i think it makes it mysterious?? idk im dumb LMAO but don’t forget to request a fic if you’d like and follow!

7:32 PM. The time where I was supposed to be studying for my upcoming exam in Chemistry, but instead I’m over at Peter’s apartment doing the complete opposite. From being teenagers, it automatically causes us to always want to touch the other, and that’s the case just about now.

Our textbooks laid on his desk as we were sitting on his bed, myself straddling his lap as he held me close to his body. Our lips were happily engaged, coming together countless times as some music played lowly in the background. May had just left to grab dinner, explaining why Peter took such advantage of the situation.

Peter’s lips left mine as they came for my neck, kissing my sweet spot tenderly. He had only waiter a couple of seconds before gliding his tongue over it, making my spine shiver rather than his. One thing that I noticed lately is that Peter is taking more control, even though his nervousness was still as clear as day.

“Peter..” I rasped, holding the back of his head. “Don’t stop.”

Keep reading

{PART 27} I Won’t Stop You // Jeon Jungkook, Vampire!AU

Originally posted by jengkook

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

Genre: Vampire!AU, Fantasy, Angst, Smut

Summary; As death enters the room to claim a soul; so does life. Who shall live and who shall die - as you begin to wonder…is this really the end?

“And as he looked upon her face amidst the madness, he saw everything he held close depart his world; while she slipped into the next”

|| Warning: This chapter contains mentions of blood and some scenes that readers may find upsetting ||

I update this series every Tuesday evening, 9pm-10pm (UK Time)

{Part 1} // {Part 26} {Part 27} {Part 28}

Keep reading

Let’s talk for a bit, because I’ve known about this for a while and I think now’s a good time to explain how I feel about using music not originally written for OC’s. This might be a lengthy read, because it’s personal. This vid was one of the first to use Tokyovania as Ink Sans’ theme.

I absolutely love when music can be associated with a character. I think it’s magical when a track makes you think of something you love or enjoy, and I love seeing messages or comments that I track I wrote would fit someone’s OC, because it feels special. Originally, this video was meant to be a tribute, with my track as the proposed theme, and I didn’t worry about it. After all, I didn’t write Tokyovania for Ink Sans, I wrote it for personal reasons, and I was sure most would understand that.

After a few months, it started to catch on for some reason that this indeed was written for him. A few other tribute vids were posted, and my name was nowhere to been seen as the artist of the track. On some videos, the name was also changed to Inklovania. The “Tokyo” was just erased, on a song containing the melody of “Tokyo Teddy Bear”, an incredibly special track I adored in 2014-2015. 

Back then I was in high school. It was me against the world, and I had two friends. Things became rough around September in 2015, and I’ll keep the events hidden because they’re not something I need a reminder of. By December I was alone, and I had nowhere to turn but to music. I walled myself off and focused on composing, and being quietly alone all the time eventually led to the idea of Undertronic.

It was around this time that I decided to compose a remix of Tokyo Teddy Bear, as it’s a song I associate with wishing I could be anywhere else when things aren’t great. Seeing as I was also remixing Undertale at the time, I thought I’d combine it with another track, as a particular character was also in the same situation as I was, in terms of emotion.

In short, it was a special little remix to me and it would stay that way until Ink Sans became involved. Like I mentioned, I love when others use my music for OC’s, but I started to realize there was something wrong when I was accused of stealing this theme from Ink Sans, that it solely belonged to him, that I didn’t write it and I was a terrible person.

And the list goes on and was almost constant. To many, I’ve been disregarded as the artist of the track because “It doesn’t matter who wrote it,” and nothing hurts more to a musical artist than having a personal song be taken, even accidentally, from you and it suddenly becomes something else. The meaning behind the song no longer matters, and no matter what I do, this song will always be known as his theme. 

It feels like a inconceivable back-stab knowing that literally millions believe this is his theme. I don’t even want to know how many would believe I stole the track from an OC, as if an actual artist doesn’t exist and the track magically created itself. Months went by, then a year went by, and I was very bitter about this track and the accusations I kept receiving. Finally I decided to write a response, and this response was “Tokyovania Control.”

I wrote in the description that I didn’t like the old Tokyovania. This is only partially true. I loved it for what it represented to me, I hated it for how I was being treated because of it.

If you may have noticed, I included new lyrics for Tokyovania Control. It was a slightly hidden, but direct message to how I felt, and it started at 0:53. Breakdown of the meaning is in the brackets.

How’d I get this feeling?  [How’d it come to this?]
I am running from this beauty,  [I am running from Tokyovania.]
Misunderstood or  [It’s been misunderstood what the track is about.]
Whom it’s made for?  [Who was the track made for? Even I’m not sure now.]
There’s no purpose,  [The song has lost its original meaning.]
Words are worthless.  [Explaining/arguing won’t do anything.]
Well, it’s still charming.  [I still adore the track though. It was special to me.]
I’d say “Sorry.”  [Sorry, it was my mistake to let harsh words harm me.]
“My mistake to let it harm me.”
“Pardon my writing.”  [Pardon my music, I’m sorry I got in your way, I should be thankful that this track is loved right? Indeed I am selfish for believing my name should be next to Tokyovania.]
Though it hurts, it still sounds special taken from me,
“Heh, oh well.”  [Though it hurts, Tokyovania still sounds special taken from me. There’s nothing I can do now, so oh well.]

It was hidden well, and I didn’t expect anyone to catch on. And I was right, no one figured out why these lyrics were added or what they meant.

So no, I still don’t mind when a track I write is used for an OC’s theme. I only mind when I become non-existent as the producer, because “Who cares who wrote it, just enjoy the music.” I also mind when I am repeatedly told my work doesn’t belong to me, and I’m a horrible person for stealing a theme that belongs to an OC.

It’s one of the reasons I tend to include signature melodies in my music now. I don’t want to be forgotten or disassociated with my work. I don’t want to be told I don’t deserve to be the artist. Is it annoying? To some it is, but it’s a hell of a lot better than going through another Tokyovania situation. Having a track recognized by millions as an OC’s theme scares me much more than having someone simply steal the track, and nothing is worse to a musician than being repeatedly told my work doesn’t belong to me anymore, it belongs to an OC, and I’m scum for thinking otherwise.

I suppose what I’m trying to say, is be careful when you decide to pick songs to represent OC’s or AU’s. You may think no harm will be done, but it’s impossible to tell if something will take off. I don’t think this has ever been discussed before. I haven’t seen any musicians write about this, or share their thoughts. But I am friends with many of the Undertale remixers, and it’s sad to see that this has also been happening to one of my best friends Kamex with his “Your Best Friend” remix:

His music is gorgeous. He’s so kind & doesn’t deserve to be treated this way. If the remix is titled “Undertale Remix”, that does not mean it is an AU Remix. It is a remix for Undertale. But because this theme was used in an AU theme compilation video, the track apparently belongs to Underfresh. Again, no artist apparently exists and track magically created itself. Even worse, he feels he needs to prove it, so far as to say he has the project files if he needs to show it. To some, he’s not even respected as the producer. If you understand how I feel with Tokyovania, you can imagine how he feels as well.

Even Inktale’s creator recognizes Tokyovania as a theme for Ink, though it’s probably accidental.

Which makes me feel even more guilty, because I hate bringing people down. And knowing this wasn’t written for the AU will probably be a disappointing let-down.

So that’s about it, I thought I might as well share my thoughts, now that it’s almost been a year since this has been going on.

On another note, I’ve been working on something for Dusttale and Outertale. The Dusttale track will probably be the next vid, I dunno.

[Edit: I took a look to see if there were any comments marked as held for review, and the first one I find is-]

[The word choice gets more colorful in there.]

anonymous asked:

I'm very conflicted about the bedroom scene,,,it was very sad for me? Lance looked so sad and disappointed and vulnerable but Keith just said "focus on your missions" because when Lance came in, he said it was bc Keith was the new leader. It was very angsty and heartbreaking to see,,,,im very conflicted about it. I hope Keith soon addresses Lance's strengths and what he admires about him bc,,,,,

THIS IS GOING TO BE LONG AND I STARTED TALKING ABOUT KEITH AND LANCE AS CHARACTERS AND I’M REALLY FUCKING SORRY OH MY GODJFDGYDSFS i get what you’re saying and i have to agree with you so i’m going to analyze some shiz… this scene has definitely opened up the opportunity for keith to actually, properly, reassure lance about his part on the team in a future episode. their development has been gradual throughout the show and this is no different… it’s one step towards something greater. we can’t expect them to instantly have all their shit perfect, you know? it’s, along with the entirety of season 3, changed the dynamic of their relationship. mutual respect, mutual trust, mutual support. they are finally really opening up to each other. 

this whole season, we see lance support and comfort keith A LOT and he does it very well… because that’s the kind of guy he is. he’s an uncle and a good friend. he has a big family, in complete contrast to what keith has. lance has lots of experience with people in general and just… having their backs, comforting and supporting them. lance loves people, he loves interacting with them and he is very good at it. family and friends are obviously extremely important to lance. the team is extremely important to lance.

lance is caring and he can read people/situations well, most of the time. i say most of the time because he never picked up on pidge being a girl even though everyone else did. he’s social and charismatic. he lifts people up, he is there for people, he makes people feel at home, in his own way… he lightens the mood with jokes and tries to diffuse the tension with jokes/changing the subject. or just by being… him. just by being lance he can turn the mood around. he can bring out the best in people and he can probably bring out the worst in them, too… i think he just brings out the most in people. this really applies to how keith is with him. lance can bring out a lot of different sides of keith, we’ve all seen that. he fires keith up, but makes him go soft and tender, too. keith is usually very stoic and closed off but lance breaks down his walls so much and it’s really great.

lance grounds people, he can cheer them up just by being who he is, just by being there. he is a constant. team voltron tends to playfully tease him or act annoyed with the things he says sometimes, but i know they are extremely fond of him. i wish they wouldn’t tease him as much as they do because i do think it gets to lance sometimes… but the problem with that is that he has never voiced his insecurities to them before… so they don’t even know that their teasing is possibly having negative effects on him, they don’t know that they’re actually hitting a sore spot. they’re friends and friends tease each other so it’s hard to like, be pissed at them because i can guarantee if lance actually voiced his insecurities to everyone… they would stop with the teasing, or at least, not tease him about stuff that would be harmful to him. i think one of the reasons why lance doesn’t voice his insecurities to everyone is because he doesn’t want them to worry, he just wants everyone to be happy and have fun… he doesn’t want to add onto all the other shit they’re dealing with.

lance uses a rifle, he’s the sharpshooter and he now uses a sniper, too… his role is one that offers support for his teammates and in a way, let’s them use the fullest of their abilities because with someone watching their backs… they don’t have to worry about someone getting the jump on them. they trust in their sniper. they trust in lance. a sniper covers their teammates and allows them to go all out. allows them to focus on what’s in front of them. lance has always excelled in ranged fighting and analyzing the situation/his surroundings and coming up with a plan that will work best for everyone. lance is an expert at supporting people, in battle and every other way.

but keith… keith is, like he even admitted himself, a loner. social interaction is not keith’s strong suit, never has been and that hasn’t changed. he is a lone wolf by nature, through and through. this is slowly changing and he is slowly opening up as he grows to view team voltron as his friends/family… but at this point, it is still there and a part of him. it most likely always will be, to some extent. keith has no family besides shiro and we know shiro is the only one who never gave up on keith… we don’t know much about his past but it is very safe to assume that keith has… never even really had a friend before voltron. he has had nowhere near as much experience interacting with people like lance has. he is very distant and closed off from the team compared to everyone else. most times when keith does seem to open up to the others, it’s during a mission or because the other person talked to him first. he does not tend to seek people out on his own because he is, after all, a loner. keith is not even that good at talking about his own feelings, he has a hard time even being in control of them sometimes… as we’ve seen when he blows up on pidge in season 1 and when he blows up on everyone in season 3. though, keith does actually admit his faults to lance this season… that is a big step for keith. that is a big step for their relationship.

keith has a hard time understanding things people say/do sometimes and he isn’t good at picking up on references or anything. lance is always a part of these scenes. the first time this happens is the “i say vol, you say tron…” scene in season 1. keith tries to play along but he doesn’t understand and lance is patient with him and tries to help him out. it doesn’t work so lance just tells him they’ll work on it. also in season 1, we have the laser guns scene. keith directly asks lance “what was that?” and lance tells him. in season 2, this progressed into lance explaining to keith, on his own, about the “hunter becomes the hunted” thing… that then progressed to when we got hunk and pidge talking technobabble and whatnot in season 3. keith instantly looks to lance for an explanation but this time, lance has no idea either. i just really like this progression shfsyfsg i think it’s important when analyzing their relationship. anyways, keith just isn’t… a social butterfly like lance and he has no fucking idea what he’s doing in regards to interacting with people most of the time.

keith uses a sword, a very quick and to the point weapon. very in your face. keith is a warrior, always on the front lines. brute force, pure instinct and skill. not thinking before acting, sometimes not even thinking about the team, as we saw on full display at the beginning of season 3. keith just goes for it, full swing. a sword does not offer support, it can be used in supportive ways, but that is not it’s purpose. it’s purpose is to go in and kill. keith is not an expert on supporting people, in battle or in any other way.

i think we have to remember all of this about keith and lance when analyzing the keith’s room scene? because yes, lance was obviously looking for a better answer than what keith gave him… he wanted to hear that he was important to the team and that he contributed. that he’s a great paladin and he doesn’t need to worry about his place on the team. but like i said, keith isn’t… good at this… he’s been better at it at times, he’s made progress… like with hunk in “the belly of a weblum” when he calmed him down and near the end of the episode when he was complimenting him but… i don’t think we can expect keith to instantly be a pro at this stuff at all times, especially because this is lance. it’s possible that keith was very confused because lance always seems so confident to him… that’s what lance lets people see, until now. this is the first time lance has come to any of his teammates about these insecurities. the way keith says “what are you talking about?” supports this… he sounds genuinely confused as to why lance would even think this about himself… and it also supports keith, in his head, probably being like wtf dude you are so important and skilled and you are my impulse control and my friend… BUT KEITH DOESN’T KNOW HOW TO SAY ALL THAT BECAUSE HE ISN’T! GOOD! AT! THIS! keith tries to reassure him, he’s just trying to tell him not to worry because he doesn’t NEED to worry because keith knows he’s IMPORTANT… but the way he says it comes off like he’s just brushing lance’s concerns away and telling him to forget about it and focus on his missions… but i don’t think he is? we’ve seen how keith has grown to care for lance, so i know he’s trying to help him, he just really doesn’t know how. it has been a point in the show to show us keith’s poor social skills due to him being an orphan and a loner. 

lance still looks sad when he’s leaving keith’s room because that’s not what he wanted to hear but this next scene is what really made this whole interaction more special and important, for both of them…

when keith says “and lance, leave the math to pidge” it is obviously him trying, in his own way, to at least cheer lance up a little bit. he did not have to call to lance, he could have just let him exit his room and that’s that… but he didn’t and that’s important. not to mention, this whole scene was just very trope-y lmfaosjdfb… this is keith teasing lance, trying to joke with him and lift his spirits even just a little bit… keith probably tried more of joke-y approach because their whole relationship has been full of lots of teasing… he took something from their conversation they just had and tried to make lance smile. like i said, keith isn’t good at this stuff so i think he’s relying on their past interactions to guide him. he is not literally calling lance dumb or useless or anything by saying “leave the math to pidge”… math is one of pidge’s strong suits, they both know this. everyone knows this. when keith said this, as well as keith teasing lance to cheer him up, i read it more as him meaning something like “leave the math to pidge because you have your own strong suits and don’t need to worry about that or your place on the team.” keith is bad with words and he is also a man of few words, in the first place. 

in this same episode, very soon after this scene takes place actually… they need to take the lions out, but just like lance said… there are six paladins now that “shiro” is back and only five lions… but keith now knows that lance believes he’s the one who will end up with no lion. before anyone else even has a chance to say anything in regards to there being more paladins than lions, keith voluntarily gives up the black lion to “shiro” and decides to stay at the castle so lance will not have to give up red. i don’t think keith did this simply because he didn’t want to lead anymore now that “shiro” is back, because he could have easily still said he wanted to take the red lion while “shiro” takes black… but he didn’t, he left red to lance. like, the fact that these two scenes took place so close together is most likely so people could make this connection, i think. it just… doesn’t feel like a coincidence that keith told lance “things will work themselves out” and then proceeded to offer being the one to stay back so lance didn’t have to leave red. of course, black ends up not letting “shiro” in because he’s a fucking fake ass bitch, so this didn’t even end up mattering but like… it’s still important and i think people should at least think about the connection to those scenes. EDIT: this totally mattered because lance was actually aware that keith did this. i just fucking forgot about that entire line like an idiot.

EDIT: please also read these posts i’m about to link. i had more to say about what went down in regards to the bedroom scene here. don’t want to squeeze it into this post so yeah. also, this anon... and this where i talk more about lance’s insecurities and why we see team voltron teasing him so much.

keith knows how talented lance is (and if he didn’t already know somehow, he definitely does now because later in this episode, lance literally saves keith’s life by shooting a blade out of MID FUCKING AIR… that shit is HARD… keith even STOPS mid battle to SMILE SOFTLY at lance and admire him and his skills… acxa is able to run right past him and he almost gets blindsided by ezor because of this… this boy is fucking whipped). keith has experienced for himself in episode 6 of season 1 that lance is very good at coming up with plans when he, himself, would rather rush right in. i think he really admires that in lance because he can’t do that. he is not the plan guy, lance is. keith is all instincts and pure skill. keith has come to know how skilled lance is and he has come to know lance. not fully, of course not, but lance is no longer a nameless face, he is no longer a “who are you?” to keith… lance is the closest person to keith after shiro. he is keith’s newfound impulse control which was shown many times this season. they are friends. lance is the first person that was able to make keith smile this season, when he was extremely upset and angry about losing shiro and the whole leading voltron thing… but lance makes him smile. he makes him smile with one single line, “i’m not the goofball! i’m like the cool ninja sharpshooter.” like i said, keith knows how skilled lance is. i’m sure keith has seen these skills in action over the course of the show… they are a team, it’d be impossible for him not to know that lance actually is an extremely skilled sharpshooter. 

when keith scoffs and says “are you joking?” (accompanied by The Soft Look) i don’t think he’s saying it to be like, “really? you’re not the sharpshooter, funny joke” because keith knows that he is… i think it’s more like keith thinking “but you ARE a goofball, too” because lance is. lance is a goofball and keith probably likes that about him judging from the look on his face… like, lance isn’t JUST the goofball, of course, but he still is a goofball. if you only listen to what keith said and don’t look at his facial expression and don’t think about the progression of their relationship over the course of the show, it’d be easy to think he’s being a dick or something… but combining it with his expression and everything else we know about their relationship, it changes it. teasing like this has always been shown to be part of their relationship. for example, when keith teased lance back in episode 6 of season 1 when he got his lion back for him… along with the many times lance has teased keith. it also really wouldn’t make sense for keith to actually be trying to start shit with lance after lance had just comforted keith in the episode prior. 

[EDITED AFTER FURTHER THOUGHT INTO LANCE’S CHARACTER AND THIS SCENE] after keith says that, i definitely think lance takes it the wrong way and it hits a sore spot (this ties in with his insecurities) so he gets all defensive and says, “i’m being completely serious when i say, i do not want you to lead me anywhere.” (even though this drastically changes later on) and then keith loses his fond look because now lance has hit keith’s sore spot and antagonized him, so he says, “i don’t want to be the leader! that’s just what shiro wanted!” and then realizes he just told them all that and looks upset. i don’t think he even meant to blurt that out, but lance riles him up… lance cracks him open. lance looks very upset, as well, after keith says this… i think lance is concerned for him in a way, because of him losing shiro, but i definitely also think… at that moment, he’s upset because he wanted to pilot the black lion since he goes on to say, “well, i never heard shiro say that, and how convenient that you’re bringing it up now that shiro is gone.” lance is being like this because keith had just unintentionally hit one of lance’s sore spots. this whole exchange gets heated because of lance’s insecurities… because keith unintentionally hurt lance while he was just trying to tease him. so, lance fluffed up his bravado and fired back with venom. lance was just soft and supportive with keith the episode prior, he’s not doing this to be a dick… he thinks keith was being a dick to him. it’s a mess, really. keith tells him, “you want the job so badly, you can have it!” and they just glare at each other.

lance didn’t even want to pilot the black lion for glory or anything, he wanted to pilot it to validate himself to the team and also… himself. his insecurities are quickly increasing. at this point, lance hadn’t even really noticed keith’s insecurities and doubts about being the leader… we see that as soon as black chooses keith and keith expresses that he doesn’t accept it, that he can’t replace shiro, that they were right, he is the loner… not the leader shiro thought he was… lance is instantly backing him up, despite being clearly affected by not being chosen by black. this was a big turning point in their relationship and for lance as a character. he matured a big amount this season. from this point on, lance always has keith’s back. he literally becomes keith’s impulse control and is able to knock some sense into him. pull him back from the edge of nearly pulling the whole team apart, from doing reckless and dumb things. only lance can fit this role with keith as leader. they are equals in this situation but honestly? i don’t think lance realizes that, considering he thinks he should step down as a paladin. considering all his self worth issues. he is literally keith’s right hand man… and the reason this works so well, the reason they are equals in this situation… is because without lance, keith would not succeed as a leader whatsoever. definitely not with how he is right now. lance doesn’t even know this though. his insecurities are about to reach a boiling point, i think… and i feel like keith is definitely going to play a supportive role for lance once he actually knows about lance’s insecurities. once lance actually, properly talks to him about them.

ANYWAYS, back the “leave the math to pidge” scene. this scene is purposefully framed in a way so we can see how lance is starting to view keith… because we are literally viewing keith through lance’s eyes. that is how the shot is set up. i didn’t realize it at first honestly, but when i watched this scene, i couldn’t shake the feeling that it was so… different and special somehow… i just couldn’t figure out why, until i read this post and it all hit me full force and honestly made me tear up. i’ll reference some things that were said but i highly recommend you read that whole post when you finish this. 

we know lance started off as viewing keith as his rival but over the course of the show, that has been changing… and this scene changes it even more, so much more… in a very big way. keith, in the first place, is usually very closed off… we all know that he crosses his arms in front of his chest a lot, people commonly do this to put up a sort of wall between them and the people around them. i actually do this when i’m in a new situation with new people and i am uncomfortable. it’s not that hard to believe that keith would do this too, considering his loner nature. he also seems to be glaring most of the time, even in the background of scenes… the shot of keith when lance is looking back at him is… very open. keith is not coming off the way we have gotten used to him being, which could be classified as very standoffish. keith is not coming off the way lance is used to seeing him. he is seeing him in a completely new and different way.

previously in this scene, while lance is voicing his concerns and his insecurities, keith has his arms crossed in front of him. there is still a barrier. 

but then we got this shot: 

whether it’s subconsciously or consciously, keith is trying to appear more friendly and welcoming towards lance. this goes along perfectly with him teasing lance, he’s trying to cheer him up and this heightens the effect. makes lance feel safe, let’s him know keith is being genuine. he is completely open and his expression is so soft. everything about this shot is so fucking soft. he doesn’t even have his jacket on… they made sure to show him hanging it up before lance entered the room and i think they showed us that because they really wanted to get across the change in keith and lance’s relationship in this shot. keith is not seen without his jacket that often and i just… refuse to believe him taking it off didn’t serve a purpose for this scene, specifically. they are both allowing themselves to be vulnerable around the other. lance voicing his insecurities to keith, out of all people (yes because he’s the leader now, but “shiro” was back at this point, lance easily could have gone to him since he literally talked about shiro going back to the black lion…), lance finally somewhat voicing his insecurities to a teammate and it happens to be keith? that’s important. and keith just… everything about keith in this fucking scene is so unlike how keith normally appears. normally, the less clothes someone has on, the more vulnerable people feel… they feel exposed. keith’s whole stance is open and this shot was also literally coded as romantic… here’s an excerpt from that post i linked before.

When a character is being admired by another character, getting a shot through their eyes of their subject from the waist up, or thighs up, or knees up, etc, is a very common way of displaying that admiration in a visual sense.

this is why so many people are comparing this shot to goddamn dating sims. that’s what it reminded ME of! the way this shot is set up is so commonly used in dating sims. i haven’t played dream daddy myself, but i’ve seen a lot of people specifically compare it to that dating sim. this shot feels intimate, it is intimate. we are witnessing lance starting to view keith in a different light because like i said, and like how that post i linked emphasizes, we are seeing keith through lance’s eyes. we’re not just seeing him through lance’s POV, but directly through his eyes. keith is the center of lance’s focus and this shot? just makes keith look really beautiful? which fucks me up because that is how lance is seeing keith. we then get lance returning the same softness keith expresses towards him:

even as lance is turning away, the smile is still on his face. i do think lance is sad and disappointed that he didn’t quite get the reassurance he needed and wanted… and someone definitely still needs to explicitly tell him he is important to the team and acknowledge his strengths and skills. keith still needs to learn how to comfort him better but i’m 100% sure we’ll get that in the future. regardless of lance not receiving the support he needed to the extent he was looking for, i think he is genuinely happy in this shot. i think keith genuinely made him feel a little better. keith did cheer him up a bit and make him smile, in his own weird ass way. remembering how the shot of keith was from lance’s eyes, the way he was seeing him… it’s safe to say that lance is starting to develop romantic feelings for keith starting, or at least really taking off, from right here.

i think this whole scene was meant to show the current level their relationship has reached and open the way for it to naturally reach a new level, in the future. lance will definitely still struggle with his insecurities, they have been a constant in every season so far… they may even get worse since he didn’t get the comfort and support that was necessary… and with time, i’m sure keith will be able to reassure him better. he’ll be able to express how much he admires him, list off his strengths without a second thought… he’ll know what lance needs to hear once they become better friends. once keith gets better at working with the team, he will be able to support lance to the extent he needs. he’ll be able to support everyone. keith needs to grow and leave more of his lone wolf nature behind because that just doesn’t work when you’re part of a team like this… he needs to get better at bonding with his team, with his friends.

EDIT: talked more about this scene here, here and here. i also compare the shot of lance looking at keith to a shot from voltron: defender of the universe here. i’ve changed my views somewhat on the whole “leave the math to pidge” scene as well, here.

RFA Yandere Headcanons

Warning: The following might contain dark content which can either make you uncomfortable or trigger you. Read at your own risk. And semi-long post, I suppose?

Yoosung:

Yoosung’s source of inspiration to do anything productive in life always came from a person. Prior to her passing, Rika was this source. However, later, you replaced her. You showed him the kindness that he needed, you believed in him far more than he ever believed in himself, and you gave him the sincerest love that he could ever wanted.

He became addicted.

Your kindness, your smiles, your love; he wanted it all directed at him, and he did not want to share it with anyone. This obsession caused him to become a tyrant who was controlled by his jealousy. His detrimental actions began with small things. First, he expressed his distaste about how you treated everyone equally, and that as your love, he deserves to be your top priority. Then, when his desire for your time and attention began to increase, it escalated to the point where he cut off your contact from everyone else but himself; so that he was would be sole person in your life.

He would be the only person who deserved your love and time.


Zen:

It was no new news to anyone that whatever Zen did, or pursued, he did it with passion, and he dedicated himself entirely to it. So, when he began his relationship with you, he was extremely dedicated and loyal to you. He wanted to spoil you and treat you like the princess he believed you to be.

And so, he became extremely overprotective.

You were not exactly super popular amongst men per se. However, you did receive your fair share of flirtatious remarks; and they would walk up to you in order to receive your phone number and such. The only issue was that this only happened when you were out with Zen. The actor did not take this nicely. If so many filthy beasts approached you when you were with him, then how bad was it when you were out in public a l o n e? This led him to become extremely protective of you, to the point where he would not allow you to be alone with another male, much less go out anywhere without him.

He was just protecting you from the filth out there. After all, he was the only beast whose wild side you would ever need to see.


Jaehee:

Baehee Jaehee absolutely adored you and treasured her friendship with you. You gave her the courage to pursue her dreams and selflessly supported her without asking for anything in return. This made her feel somewhat insecure because in this relationship, for her, you were the only one who was giving and she was the one taking. She began to fear that if she did not reciprocate the giving part in your ‘friendship’ then you would leave her.

You were the only person that she had. She could not possibly let that happen.

And so, she began to go to extra miles to pay back your kindness. You have too much work? Don’t worry, she’ll do it for you. You do not feel like doing something that you need to? Don’t worry, she’ll take over and finish it for you. Her ‘helping’ got to the point where all together, she would do everything for you. As a result, you came to have all the time in the world, and she was always busy. Too busy to even share a small “hi, how are you” with you. This led you seek the company of other RFA’s members, which she did not like. She became possessive to the point where she began to emotionally blackmail you. She threatened to hurt herself if you ever left her behind for others.

“Is my best not enough for you? Would you like my life itself too?


Jumin:

Jumin loved you. He loved you so much, he was unable to express it with words. And so, he began to express it with actions. He wanted to do everything for you and in order to do everything for you, he needed to know everything about you. This led him to conduct his own entire research of you. He took notes about everything: from your lifestyle to all of your small and adoring perks. And it was unfortunate that there were things about your lifestyle that he did not like.

And so, he took control.

First, he persuaded you to move out from your place due to it’s ‘poor and unsatisfactory conditions’ and move in with him. Once that was accomplished and you were in a place where he could keep a track of you constantly, slowly but surely, he forced you to cut ties with people that he deemed to be unworthy for someone of your class. And that was like pretty much everyone you knew except for him. From that point on, his control increased to the point where what you wanted and what he wanted for you became two different things. And your control over your own needs and wants ceased and his order became obligatory.

He became the authority; your caretaker, your lover.  You saved him from his loneliness but instead, you became the slave to his crazy love. 


Seven:

It was love at first sight. As soon as he had opened the materials in order to conduct a background search on you, he had noticed how his heart beat felt faster by just a second. Dare he say, he was almost smitten. Originally, Seven had no plans to do act on the feelings he had developed for you because he was ‘too dangerous.’ However, that changed, when your life was put in danger.

In that instance, he realized, that he was only one who could protect you.

And so, this led him to act on his feelings and confess to you. It was fortunate that you reciprocated his feelings and everything was well. That was until he began to become paranoid which led him to install tracking applications in your electronic devices. He was aware of your whereabouts and your every actions. You felt watched at every second of the day. His reasoning for this was that he needed to protect you. However, when all this watching became too overwhelming and you asked him to decrease it, he didn’t. As a result, you threatened to leave him if he did not abide by your wishes. This did nothing but add fuel to the fire because it resulted him in tying tracking wires around your wrists that could only be removed by him. 

Everything is for your own good.


Masterpost | V + Saeran Yandere! Headcanons

when de-stress? we all have those moments when we are exhausted with work but at the same time also overwhelmed and stressed about the rest of the work we got to do. specifically at this time, it’s does good to take a step back and just let go of your worries till the time you start on work again - it’s time to de-stress my folks :’)
      - i bring you a list of things which will help you calm your mind and take control of yourself; let’s begin!!


to calm down your mind after a stressful day

  • cuddle with pets (or better, with stuffies!!)
  • got those 8 hours of sleep? If not, jump in to take a nap!
  • meditate, at least for 5-10 minutes - take control of your mind
  • drink lots and lots of water!! (doesn’t help you to de-stress in real sense, but helps you feel a lot better)
  • listen to some calming music (rain sounds, ambient music whatever suits your taste!)
  • or blast out pop music and dance around to release tension
  • workout till you’re sore. don’t stop. (this helps I swear, bc you just feel really tired to even worry)
  • talking to fam or friends (or me!!) about what’s stressing you out
  • live in the moment. stop worrying about things on which you don’t have control on and about future work. what’s going to come will come; it doesn’t do good to worry about them.

some calming things to do

  • try making a beautiful new bullet journal spread; put a lot of effort in it
  • maybe paint? draw? (personally, drawing flowers help me relax)
  • eat your comfort food; cook it yourself too
  • do a bit of reading out of your favourite book (we the #nerds)
  • close your eyes and think about happy moments and nothing else
  • practice something which takes patience like calligraphy, sewing or just planting a sapling
  • have cake and chocolate or sweet stuff bc sweet things are amazing always
  • self care!! my personal favourite!! put on that face mask, listen to your favourite music and take a long long bath using bath bombs!! such royalty haha
  • drink hot chocolate or green tea :’) no coffee though, pals
  • become a child. notice the small things - they’ll give you much more joy than fancy parties and pricey things will do (e.g. sing nursery rhymes, play hide and seek, go out in the sunshine and get an ice - the list goes on!)
  • watch nice YouTube videos!! hint: routine videos specially night ones are wonderful to watch and are always super relaxing!!
  • call over some friends, have a sleepover and giggle about stupid things (e.g. my sister and I are the absolute riots, we were giggling about nursery rhymes the other day; she’s like twiiinkhle twiiinkhle luly staryyy; basically messing up the lyrics - lowkey cracked me up hahaha)
  • sometimes though, just starting on the work that you had been procrastinating on will help you relax bc you are getting work done
  • lastly, sTOP worrying and stressing!! stressing about stupid things is the main reason why you feel overwhelmed; so stop fam!!

have a wonderful day, love!! I hope this list helped you in some way!! :-)

go check out my other masterposts here and you can always sent in a request for a masterpost as my ask box is always open!! (´。• ᵕ •。`) ♡
love, Taylor xo

A very long time ago @jennthereaper and @simplyn2deep both sent me this prompt, and I’m so sorry it’s taken me so long, but the other day I was finally inspired to take a stab at it. I hope you enjoy!

From The Way You Said “I Love You” 

#26 Broken, as you clutch the sleeve of my jacket and beg me not to leave

Please, Derek, please, I–“ Stiles chokes back the beginnings of tears and clutches harder at the sleeve of Derek’s jacket. He’s on his knees, having tripped in his scramble to get to Derek from the other side of the loft. “I love you, okay? And I’m sorry I didn’t say it before, I’ve been a coward about this whole thing, but I love you. And I know you love me too. I know you do, and I need you not to leave like this, fuck, Derek, please don’t do this.”

Derek stares down at him for a long time, heart clenched in his throat.

And then he looks up at where the other Stiles is pursing his lips in a hard frown as he watches the scene.

“It isn’t real?” Derek asks for the hundredth time since the other Stiles, the real Stiles, showed up in this apparent dreamscape.

Stiles shakes his head stiffly.

The Stiles on the floor is still pleading with him around tears, but the noises of his despair are starting to fade, as if Derek were now hearing him from a distance. Even his heartbeat, a sound that Derek has been clinging to as an anchor for what feels like forever, begins to disappear.

Derek swallows and steels himself against feeling anything more than determination to get through this newest mess.

“What now?” he asks, tone clinical and firm.

Stiles answers him in a similar tone, his expression betraying nothing about what’s going on in his own head. A far cry from the Stiles that Derek first met a couple years ago, terrified and mouthy and young. “Now you wake up.”

Keep reading

Working with energy sources

How do you power your magic? As with anything magical, there are far more answers than any one person would care to know. When it comes to spells, what you use can have a potent influence on the efficacy of the spell. Whether channeling, transmuting, or just using your own internal energy,  it’s good to consider the source of the spell’s power when crafting it. More traditionally minded witches look toward the elements and herbal/crystal correspondences, but there’s also plenty of other ways to power your spells! Here, I review some common and uncommon energy sources and how to use them. This list is most certainly not exhaustive and is intended more to provide a starting point for thinking about what makes different energy sources unique. If you don’t already, I encourage you to think critically about the sources of magical power you use and what makes them so effective!

 
Traditional Sources:

  • The sun - As the primary provider of measurable energy such as light and heat, the sun is essential to life. Solar energy is potent and unfiltered so it’s very powerful, but also undirected. For both physical and magical purposes, solar energy has to undergo transformative processes in order to be useful to us. Channeling solar energy to power a spell is a common practice, though it should be done with care since the sun tends to burn up whatever it touches when used irresponsibly. 
  • The moon - The moon is the gentler counterpart to the sun. It traditionally fills a more mystical role, better suited to emotionality, secrecy, and protection than raw strength. The moon’s phases also offer clear time periods to suit different goals, especially ones that need time to develop. Many practitioners choose to time their workings by the moon’s phases, like to ensure that a spell manifests by a certain point in time. 
  • Candles - A candle is a firey energy source that can be easily manipulated by the practitioner. Like all fire-based energies, it is best suited for creative works, strength of will, etc. Candles are especially useful due to the high degree of specification they can have. A candle dressed in oil or carved with an intention can be more closely bound to the magical goal and thus more easily channeled into the spell. Herbs, colors, sizes, and scents may also be used to attune the energy source to the goal. Furthermore, the practitioner has direct control over the source itself and can make use of lighting and extinguishing the candle as a means of manipulating the spell’s energy. 
  • Grounding, earthing - There seems to be a bit of disagreement over whether grounding is best used as a conclusion to a spell or as an energy source for a spell, but I think the reason for this is that there are several different kinds of grounding processes. When grounding a spell after its completion, the practitioner is sending the existing magical energy back into the world in order to allow it to take effect and manifest. Grounding as an energy source is a way of channeling energy from the earth (or the universe) to power your spell. Both are good techniques in my opinion, though I tend to find other ways of concluding and “sending out” my magical works similarly effective. 

Man-made Sources:

  • Railroads - Railroads are an old form of energy, at least as far as man-made sources go. They are a good source of energy for things that need a lot of strength, or that need to travel long distances. They also have a significant association with trade and commerce, as well as with moving or traveling for pleasure.
  • Subways - I find myself using subways most often for work related magic. I find the electrified third rail to be a powerful point to tap into when working spells that need to reach across the city (like calling for trains to come sooner) or when I’m working in the direct vicinity. Subway commuters tend to be pretty well synchronized to the ambient energy, so you could also probably use some of it to affect the atmosphere on the platform or give yourself a little boost of energy before heading off.
  • Outlets & Adapters - I love using adapters for charging little charms and sigils! It’s a pretty neutral energy, plus it’s well suited to passive charging. Usually, I can leave stuff sitting on my laptop adaptor overnight and find it all juiced up in the morning. You could also definitely transmute it for use in more structured/ritual-based spells, though I find it a bit awkward to include.

Internal Sources:


  • Personal energy - Like most things, the magical practitioner themselves may act as an energy source. In some cases, this is desirable as it allows for a very personal mark on the spell. Tying a spell’s energy to one’s own will and strength gives the practitioner direct control over the spell and also can help them keep tabs on how active the spell is. On the other hand, a spell might require more energy than the practitioner has to offer, potentially draining the user unexpectedly, causing the spell to fail, or both. Personally, I use my energy when I have some extra to spare, which is a nice way of saying I dump all my anger into my curses. When doing that, I also make sure to seal off the spell when I’m done so none of it comes back to me. If you choose not to seal off your workings entirely, you may leave a limited connection in order to keep tabs on whatever it is you’re powering. I do this for simple servitors and wards so that I can keep them from running too low. I wouldn’t recommend dumping all your energy into a spell all at once because you can and will exhaust yourself.
  • Channeling - Channeling is less a source of its own and more a means of using sources like those mentioned above. When channeling energy, the practitioner simply acts as a conduit to direct external energy into their magical work. Channeling is generally regarded as a pretty basic energy work skill and is virtually essential for witches, regardless of path. Of course, now that I’ve said that, someone’s going to tell me they have a practice that never uses channeling, but hey, that’s how it goes. I think the trickiest part of channeling is keeping your energy and the energy you’re channelling separate. Obviously, your own personal energy can be used in a spell, but that gets exhausting fast and if you’re trying to avoid that by channelling, you should be careful not to still end up draining yourself too. Likewise, channelling opens you up to direct contact with external energy sources, some of which you may not want lingering around. If you’re worried about getting stuff mixed up, try working with a familiar energy source like a crystal or a plant before working with more powerful energy like the sun or a planet.
  • Transmutation - Like channelling, transmutation is a way of making use of energy. Its main difference is that instead of using an energy specially chosen for the practitioner’s purposes, they simply pull from what’s around and transform it on the fly. Transmutation requires a bit more practice than channeling, as you have to modify the energy you’re bringing in before you can make use of it, but it’s also damn convenient. I find it best used when working with neutral energy, especially the kind that seems to linger around cities and man-made sources. Neutral energies can also be combined through transmutation, so you can even mat Transmutation of natural sources is most definitely possible, but it’s best suited to the kind of generic energy that you’d find in unprogrammed quartz rather than say, trying to transmute the energy in lavender for a nasty curse.

I wrote this very quickly and I’m not sure it makes any sense but here just take it!! & please feel free to add on with any of your favorite energy sources and how you use them

→ Paper Doll | 01

Originally posted by sugutie

☆ pairing → Jungkook x Reader

☆ genre → idol+singer-songwriter!au, drama, slight angst

 warning sexual themes with smut in the next chapters, mentions of past unhealthy relationship 

☆ word count   → 2.1k

summary   → When the nation’s little sister, IU, gets into a huge scandal, your agency seizes the opportunity to thrust you into that now vacant spotlight. Your self-composed song Paper Doll becomes an overnight sensation, and soon people are itching to find out who was the one who broke your heart. All hell breaks loose once netizens discover that you used to date popular idol, Jeon Jungkook. Little do they know that it wasn’t him who left the relationship unscathed –  it was you.

alternatively: a story on the consequences of a hit break-up song

01 | 02 


a/n  → so basically this is me being coerced into writing jjk smut 
edit: pt i is more of a prologue



[+11,435; -2,003] this really breaks my image of him… proves how you can’t judge someone from their personality on camera

[+9,386; -1,983] all this time he was pretending to be super innocent haha all those stupid fangirls throwing money at him blindly must be going crazy

[+5,903; -1,234] i mean everyone goes through break-ups, but he was cosplaying as an innocent guy who was scared of skinship with girls all these years.. lmao he’s super shamel–

The words on the screen in front of him all blurred and bled into one big stain. He quickly scrolled through the hundreds and hundreds of comments, each more condemning than the last. A steady pressure was building in his ears, until the only thing he could see or feel were the accusations of a faceless crowd, all jeering at him loudly, fingers pointed.

It was as if his entire life flashed in front of his eyes right then, and he could suddenly recall every inconsequential and significant thing that had shaped his life the past seven years – the hours and hours spent in front of the mirror rehearsing the same steps over and over again, the taste of soggy ramen Hoseok hyung had let overcook last week, the screams of fans, the sound of his alarm clock, the look on your face when you told him it was over. There was no chronology to the kaleidoscope of fleeting glimpses of his past.

“What,” he breathed, hands shaking, eyes wide and disbelieving as his phone fell with a clatter on the table. He desperately wanted to ignore reality, but the stares that were all focused on him kept him grounded to the present.

Of course his first scandal would be linked to you.

Keep reading

So Anti’s back. Time to hyperfocus

Today’s episode of Hyperfocus is on what Anti says.

So for any of you who are extremely confused (I was too until I did some hardcore searching), Anti made his grand return in the intro for Jack’s PAX East panel. The reason you may be seeing so many phone- recorded videos is because Jack told people to record it on their phones. But… Was it Jack?

We’ll get to that in a minute.

First, let’s start with Anti’s first words, a voiceover on nothing. Did you miss me?” 

Sound familiar? Oh, yeah.

Dark said it when he came back. I’m willing to bet Anti got similar reactions. I, at least, reacted the same way for both: a little flailing, a little fangirling, and repeating, “Yes, yes I did.”

Next: 

“Look at you all just sitting there, you all thought I was gone. Not worrying about anything. You all thought I was gone, but I’ve been here this entire time, keeping an eye on things.”

Anti, like Dark, wants us to pay attention. The difference here is that while Dark feeds off our attention and needs it (see: “You just need to let me in”), Anti simply craves the attention. As soon as the spotlight was off of him, he got jealous. He lashed out, because he wants to be seen again.

And when he says “I’ve been here this entire time,” that goes along with a lot of theories centered around the idea that Anti really did get rid of Jack on Halloween, and that Anti has just been pretending this entire time. Every glitch and Anti sighting between then and now has been Jack trying to get our attention.

Anti insults us. “Look at you all just sitting there.” He makes us feel at fault. He says we should have been worried. Flashback to Halloween, when he says “This is your fault.” He blames us. 

But he’s been here the entire time, which leads me back to what I said above about Jack telling us to record with our phones. Was it Jack? My theory is, no. If Anti claims to have been here this entire time, there has not been a single moment that it has been Jack since before Halloween. 

Moreover, I think Anti wanted a record of his reappearance, but in a chaotic way. This wasn’t in a video uploaded to Jack’s channel, it was an intro to a live event. Multiple people record this on their phones and share it on Tumblr, and the entire fandom is thrown into confusion and chaos.

Yeah, I’m pretty sure it was Anti.

“You stopped paying attention. Well, I hope you’re happy. You’ve found someone new. You threw me aside. Someone to replace me.”

Again, Dark.

I wanted Dark and Anti to get along, but this right here makes me think that if they ever did meet, it would not be good.

Dark said he’d been “Pushed aside, replaced, mocked.” Most people agree that he was referring to Anti here. Anti had been getting most of the attention, and Dark was a little mad about it. But when Dark got to us, when we let him in on Valentine’s, it satiated his need for attention. He believed that he wouldn’t have to deal with Anti anymore, because he came back.

Anti, on the other hand, not only said “Betrayal, neglect, mistake,” he also said this very cryptic little phrase: “cheap imitator.” 

Most people, again, agree that after Dark came back, Anti got jealous once again. But instead of saying he’d been pushed aside, replaced, and mocked, he’d been betrayed and neglected. By us. He believes that by even looking at Dark, we’ve betrayed and neglected him. He calls Dark a mistake, and a cheap imitator. Not good.

But then this. “You’ve found someone new. You threw me aside. Someone to replace me.”

Again, the only thing I could imagine he is talking about is Dark. We turned to Dark, and Anti is not happy.

“I’m not going anywhere. I’m always there, always watching. You can’t get rid of me.”

This goes back to above, where Anti says he’s always been there. Not much else to say about this, other than he’s always watching.

He sees everything we do. How we react to him, how we react to Dark. He sees every little headcanon we cook up. And he really doesn’t care what we say. Like Fall Out Boy said, “I don’t care what you think as long as it’s about me.”

Here’s a big difference between Anti and Dark. Dark needs us to trust him and even like him for his plans to play out. Anti, on the other hand, just wants us to watch. He doesn’t care about controlling us, because he believes he can do anything on his own. We can’t get rid of him. When he says that, he shows that he truly doesn’t care what we think as long as we pay more attention to him than Dark.

Enjoy the show.”

The first thing that popped into my head was Mark’s Raspy Hill video, which was arguably an early Darkiplier appearance. Although it isn’t canonical or acknowledged by Mark, we all kind of understand it to be Dark. (Sidenote, even back then, before Dark had concrete characteristics, we can still see him trying to make us trust him. More on that if you want it. Hmu.) In that video, Dark says, “Enjoy your stay.”

Enjoy is the key word here. I don’t think either Dark or Anti truly meant that they want us to enjoy in the common sense of the word. They meant to pay attention, and don’t try to leave. No matter what, the show is going to be worth watching.

Edit: I’ve been reminded of Natewantstobattle’s Sister Location song “Enjoy the Show” featuring Jack and HOW COULD I FORGET. And, yeah, maybe Anti threw that little reference in there for kicks and giggles. Anti likes showing up in horror games, doesn’t he? I highly doubt that Anti was making direct reference to Dark, and it’s entirely possible that he was referencing the song “Enjoy the Show,” but at this point it’s impossible to separate Anti and Dark completely. There is undeniable interaction between the two.

~

Oh, and the sliced neck? Yeah, kind of confirms that Jack is gone. Anti has been in control since Halloween. 

And the gauges? Most likely a canonical character trait. Makes Anti edgier.

fall

or…lena doesn’t stop believing in the one person who believed in her

(or…the terrible thing i wrote to get rid of writer’s block and it’s long and sad but has a happy ending)

Supergirl dies on a Wednesday.

Sometimes, when she’s alone in her office in the wee hours of the morning, still in yesterday’s clothing and unsure when she’d last eaten, she thinks about that, the utter normalcy of losing National City’s hero on a Wednesday. Somehow, the death on such a boring day of the week provides a sort of stark contrast that Lena has trouble wrapping her head around. After all, surely the hero and pride of National City would fall in a blaze of glory on a Friday night, a Sunday afternoon, even a Monday morning during rush hour.

But a Wednesday? Some time between mid-morning and noon? When nothing was happening except for the drudge of the week, the tireless churning of society?

She doesn’t understand it—has tried to come to terms with it with very little success. In her weakest moments, when she’s staring down the end of a bottle of whiskey or wine (before Jess or Maggie or even James Olsen pry the bottle from her fingertips and help her get home), she thinks the very banality of Supergirl’s death is evidence of its unnecessary nature, its needless, pointless, meaningless, asinine

Supergirl dies on a Wednesday.

By Friday, the President herself comes to National City to mourn the fallen hero. She talks about the few short conversations she’s had with Supergirl, how everyone should be inspired and follow Supergirl’s wonderful example. A true hero, an exemplary citizen.

(Lena doesn’t go to the ceremony. She and Alex spend that afternoon in Kara’s apartment, sitting on Kara’s couch, Alex stoically staring at the television screen with silent tears running down her cheeks and Lena gripping her hand so tightly she thinks she’ll break fingers.  

After that, Lena doesn’t see much of Alex at all.)

Keep reading

Call It Suicide

A/N: Well, it’s been a full month since my last fic that I posted and I felt like it was time for a new one. Another Harry Styles fic because he’s such a legend and I love him so deal with it. This took me a good few days to finally finish, hence why it’s legit the longest thing I’ve ever written, because I wanted to get this really good because I literally write my fics in one night normally so enjoy this as much as I enjoyed writing it x.

Based on: ‘Suicide’ by James Arthur

Dedicated to: @twerkit-hxrry, and TheHSquad: @17-blackaf, @harryxmac, @snlhaz, @spectralstyles, @wishfulharrie, @stylishmuser, @hes-writings94, @the2k17harry, @roseonhissleeve, @hs-1dfan, @soloharrles, @mizpahes, @hcrrystyles, @hes-a-rainbow, @lovingstyles87, @namelesspops, @gemmadorrego, @ever-since-kiwi, @harry-writings, @harrywavycurly, @harryslittlekiwis, @hotmessharry

Warning(s): Cheater!Harry, sad themes, swearing, a section of smut with very minimal Daddy kink

Word count: 8,005

Pairing(s): Harry Styles x Reader / Harry Styles x OC (Original Character)



It ain’t the gun,
It’s the man behind the trigger.
Gets blood on his fingers and runs.
It ain’t the lie,
It’s the way that the truth is denied.


Four years.

A relationship that had withstood all trying odds thrown at it, time and time again. A relationship that, from the outside, never once seemed anything short of miraculous. Four years of that relationship had been a blessing and to her, nothing and no one could ever give her the satisfaction nor sensation of pure love and dedication, she feared she may never find something quite like it again.

It’s funny how certain situations arise, that are unexpected in the worst way possible, which make the mere thought of carrying on with the toxicity of a failed relationship unbearable.

It had taken a whole three months for her to coax a confession out of her tattooed lover which, during that time, almost made her physically ill to think about him, not only being sexually (but possibly also romantically) inclined with another woman, but lying so blatantly to her face about the multiple occasions he had, ‘ran out to get some deodorant’, during the dead of night, only to come back to their shared home in the morning with a different type of exuberant smell catching in the air from his body and clothing.

When confronted about this, however, the long-legged man stood in front of her, but yet, no eye-contact was maintained, and shook his head, pushing past the fragile woman he claimed to love for an extended period of time before slamming the heavy, mahogany bedroom door, muttering incoherent sentences on his way that normally consisted of, “Gettin’ on my fuckin’ last nerve”, and, “I ‘ave half the mind t’ leave you right fuckin’ now”.

Of course, it was when the luminous moonlight danced across the wooden floorboards of the bedroom, illuminating the whitewashed walls as if it was their own private, personal stage where they could showcase their undying love for one another, or so she once thought.

It was when the early hour of 3am came creeping around the corner with only the sounds of the wind whistling and the leaves whispering to keep her company as she laid in an empty, king-sized, luxurious bed that was meant to be a symbol of their companionship.

It was when she felt the all-too-familiar feeling of abandonment and loneliness twist inside her gut as fresh, hot tears sprung to her eyes and trickled down to her ears whilst unmoving and staring at the intricate detail of the high ceiling. She had been doing this for so many nights she was near confident that she could recite how many swirls and dots collected in the design from her counting.

Of course, it was then that she understood that she was no longer the apple of his eye. That he had escaped from her hold and found refuge in someone else’s arms. Someone else’s kiss. Someone else’s touch.

He would never admit this though, no, he would much rather sneak back into his own home where his significant other would lay, pretending to be asleep through her dry, tear-stained cheeks, rolled over to her side of the bed with him removing his clothes to slide skilfully underneath the untouched covers on his end, like he had been used to trying to not disturb her, before pressing a chaste kiss to her neck and whisper those three words that held no real regard.

He didn’t mean it.

Not since he started smelling like a perfume she could not recognise.

Every morning, a smell of fresh coffee and breakfast foods invaded his privacy that would jolt him awake, noticing his lady of four years had already made her side of the bed and left him a note in her cursive handwriting, that he used to adore, as she did routinely since they moved in together.

And every morning he would stalk downstairs to find her cooking for the both of them out of the kindness of her broken heart despite knowing about his infidelity and unfaithfulness before he wrapped his strong, manly arms around her trembling waist as sobs racked through her entire being.

Although, these said tears were soothed almost instantly as she felt the dry lips of the man she loved along her jawline and neck, peppering gentle kisses to her skin. She knew she shouldn’t be so easily swayed when he hadn’t even muttered a single word to her but she couldn’t control her feelings; feelings of anger and despair quickly dissolving into ones of adoration and desperation towards the figure looming over her.

A shaky hand was raised to caress his prickly, stubbly cheek as she closed her eyes and enjoyed one of the rare moments of intimacy the couple shared nowadays, willing herself not to shed any more saltwater from the seas swirling in her eyes.

A waft of the faint smell of cinnamon and honey contrasted with her regular scent of vanilla and fruits that brung her out of her Harry-induced daze, making her pull away from the man she could no longer trust.

“Don’t walk away from me. Please. No’ today.” He pleaded, she almost could have believed he was being genuine if it weren’t for the black lace thong she’d discovered discreetly hidden inside his trouser pocket whilst doing the laundry last Sunday. He knew this, yet he still didn’t bother to hide the piece of evidence elsewhere. It was almost as if he had wanted her to feel her heart drop to her stomach.

“Harry, by my walking away, it gives you the leverage you need t’ turn in the opposite direction and in'a her bed.” She spoke in rebuttal under her breath; hoping her words wouldn’t travel far enough and stop short before they could reach his ears; in a way, recreating how whenever she gave him her all, it never seemed to find its destination within him and instead go off-track.

Perhaps that was the reason why her love wasn’t reciprocated.

“Wha’ did you jus’ say t’ me?” The sound of heavy footsteps coming back round the large, marble countertop placed in the middle of the spacious kitchen to her after grabbing a snack from the cabinet, not only made her anxious but also incredibly uncomfortable as she never wanted to carry such negative conversations with the center of her affection, knowing that he would deny all the objectives she would present to him, similar to how he had before.

“Don’t worry ‘bout it, baby.” She forced a fake smile onto her face, an expression she had grown accustomed to whenever she looked too deep into his pools of jade he called, ‘eyes’, digging out information she never thought she would have to read. She turned her body around to crash against his chiselled chest, trapping her between the oven and his own furnace, his body giving out warmth she used to find comfort in. “I didn’t say anything important, I promise, now gimme a kiss.”

Seemingly satisfied with the answer he was provided with, he leant in to press his lips hard against hers and rested his palms on her hips.

Undoubtedly, it was one of the most difficult things she had ever had to do. To kiss him as if her heart wasn’t crumbling like the walls around her; suffocating her, was too much to bare as she finally pushed him away and wiped her lips with the back of her hand.

“How dare you stand here and kiss me with tainted lips you’ve put on another girl. How dare you stand here and pretend you’re committed t’ us. And how dare you stand here and make me a fool for loving you when you go out and make love t’ that woman you found at a dingy, dark nightclub one lonely winter’s night.” The streams of emotions flowed down her red, puffy cheeks as she expressed her discontent and disappointment from within.

It had been a long time coming and she knew she couldn’t hold it in any longer. Not when he made no effort to admit to his wrongdoings, but instead gave her false hope towards a relationship that was barely alive.

His arms tried to reach out towards his beautiful explosion but she couldn’t stand to look at him for longer than she had already endured and backed away from his softening stare.

He couldn’t continue his façade, not anymore.

“No, sweetheart, please…” He began to somehow explain months of late nights and cold shoulders, but she had heard and lived through everything she needed to in order to make her final decision as she knuckled away her falling tears and practically sprinted to the bedroom to collect her belongings. “It jus’ happened! It was out of my control, baby, you have t’ believe me!”

She had to leave.

No more could she sit there and act as if they were the couple they used to be in the beginning. No more could she sit there and act as if he was the man she fell in love with.

The door clicked shut just as she zipped up her suitcase, signalling he’d now entered the room that was once filled with the purity of their love. The moment he slept next to her curled up body in the middle of the Stygian night after he spent his evening in a stranger’s bed, the barrier was broken and was replaced by one of deception and distrust.

His feet padded furiously against the pristine, fluffed rug situated at the center of the space before slamming his hand on top of the lid of the luggage in an attempt to keep the woman he genuinely loved deep down from leaving him.

“Harry. Get your hand off.” She threatened with a calm, gentle voice which she never used unless she was livid behind her cool, collected nature.

“Listen t’ me. I didn’t mean for this t’ happen, I didn’t mean t’ lie t’ y-…” He, again, was cut off by her forcefully lugging her property out from under his grasp and onto the floor with a loud ‘bang’.

“It wasn’t the lie! It was never the lie! I’ve known for months, Harry. ’S the way you denied the truth every single time I asked you about it! And if you’re implying that that’s the worst of it, I don’t even wanna think about the things you’ve done t’ her and vice versa.” She stayed glaring straight into his watery irises for a few seconds before spinning on her heel and walking out, deserting a broken man with his broken heart gazing at the now wide-open entrance with traces of her vanilla scent lingering but her nowhere to be found.


You’ve been killing softly and finally,
That is too much. (Oh)
And I’m all out of whiskey,
To soak up the damage you’ve done. (Oh)


         You would think drowning her sorrows in her tears and heartbreak would’ve been enough to express her emotions but no. She had managed to find herself amongst sweaty, filthy bodies in a large bar from which she had drunk her fifth glass of strong alcohol, she could barely see straight.

With the toxic fluids coursing through her veins, the pumping bass of the latest chart-topper beating her heart for her, and conversations of the blurred people around her resounding in her psyche, she had had enough.

Hard to believe, but it was a rare occurrence that she would even bother to dress herself up and emerge from her temporary abode, with her estranged high school friend she had recently been in contact with, to appear at the local bar she used to go to with Harry whenever they wanted to get away.

It used to be a sort of sanctuary for the two of them. It used to be a chance to just talk about their day and their feelings to each other without anyone else prying into their business. But now it was, and would forever be, “the place where he met her”.

“The place where he inadvertently broke the bond between lovers which he vowed to never do”.

Yet still, there she was.

Sitting alone on a high stool, gripping the side of her glass so tightly that the beads of condensation evaporated under the red heat of her fingers and inner turmoil.

She had just been staring at the wine glasses hanging down from the ceiling, like bats in a cave, whilst downing her beverage in record speed which allowed her to move swiftly onto her next drink. Even the bartender had started to get conscious of her intake and that was enough for him to then refuse to supply another source of liquor.

Her newly rekindled friendship with her high school classmate had been put to the test that evening and unfortunately, by her having no one she knew around in her presence, let her know that she need not care for the whereabouts of her friend as they didn’t care for hers after the second round of alcohol.

The sudden deprivation of a stinging solution making its way down her throat since she had been scolded like a child for the excessiveness of her drinking, made her mind wander into the fields of betrayal that replaced the meadows of happiness she used to frolic in with the man she used to think she would one day marry.

As soon as her gaze fixated on the empty glass in front of her, the saline tears poured over the barrier of her waterline and left her silently sobbing through her harrowing heartbreak.

Dying from a broken heart was something she had only read about in the news and never once believed it to ring true but as she sat there, in Harry and her bar, she could practically feel her chest contracting and splitting into two halves. Although, she didn’t really understand how considering he still had her heart in the palm of his hands and desperate for his love.

The mere sight of a grown woman openly, and drunkenly, weeping must’ve been hard for surrounding strangers to handle since by the time she had ceased her muffled cries to soft sniffles and looked up with bloodshot, sore eyes - most of the partygoers she had mixed in with had departed and left only her and a few stragglers behind with a busied bartender wiping down spilt beverages with a cloth.

The palms of her hands were raised to her reddened face and rubbed over her features to try and soothe her outburst of feelings as a heavy sigh was blown out from her pale lips in response to the heavyweight she felt in her chest.

Heels clicked on the floor of the building as she dug into her purse to find flimsy pieces of paper that represented a form of payment she could offer the man behind the counter for the alcohol she had consumed.

“On the ‘ouse.” A clear, but deep voice sounded from in front of her as her glass was collected, “Yeh look like yeh had a bad one so don’t worry 'bout it.”

Her hard and focused stare switched from her trying to find her money in her purse to kind, pitiful, sapphire eyes as she faced the generous bartender.

“Noo. No, I can’t jus’ no’ payy yew. ’Ve 'ad like nine'een drinkss-..” Her slurred speech in between her not-so-subtle sniffs and hiccups made the stranger chuckle and she watched how his shoulders moved, fascinated by the way they were connected to his body that she felt the need to touch hers to confirm her suspicions that yes, she had shoulders too.

“Don’t mention it, love, I’ll call you a taxi.” He informed the unsteady woman the other side of the counter before picking up his phone and dialling a number he knew off by heart from the amount of times he had to ring because of previous passed out customers.

Love.

A completely innocent and everyday nickname she had been called before by many people, but this particular time made her legs shake and her lip quiver as she fought to hold back more streams of sadness.

Harry used to call her, “love”.

Harry used to show her love.

And Harry used to give her love.

But that was all gone.

All of it wasted and bestowed onto the other woman in her relationship.

She supposed it was a good thing that he had decided to take that route. She supposed it was a good thing that he made it clear she wasn’t enough. That she wasn’t what he wanted. That way she could confidently move on and find another to treat her right.

But her heart wouldn’t allow it.

Her heart remained in the familiar hands of her puppeteer and continued to make his own lovesick puppet out of her. Why? She may never understand. She only knew that he had a fatal hold on her; squeezing ever so softly but growing tighter with each and every day that passed by, that she feared she might have wound up helpless and perishing in his addicting arms.

He had been killing her softly, albeit unknowingly, but she had finally decided it was too much and escaped his grasp physically.

His emotional duress on her, however, was a different story altogether which she thoroughly believed she would never be able to evade.



If there is one thing that I’m guilty of,
It’s loving and giving when you take too much.

//•//
If there’s anything I’m guilty of,
It’s loving you too much.


         “Harry, stop!” The exclamation was followed by a giggle as she extended her hands out to cover the lens of the new, vintage camera she had purchased especially for him on their third year anniversary as a strong, steady couple.

“You’re jus’ the most gorgeous thing I’ve ever seen, darlin’, I 'ave t’ take photos t’ capture your beauty.” He exaggerated and winked when he switched his eyes to stare at her smiling face rather than through the viewfinder.

“Ew, you’re such a dork.” A pillow was lugged at his head which, as a result, made his curls fly out in every direction possible, him then looking like a human version of Simba. “You look the most attractive you’ve ever looked right now, baby.” A snort came from her button nose as she reached for the device in his hands, turning it on him and clicking the shutter multiple times at different angles.

“And you just sounded the most attractive you’ve ever sounded.” He spoke in rebuttal before shaking his hair out of his face and tamed it slightly.

A playful pout was brought upon her lips as a sign of her disappointment that her masterpiece was ruined but she continued to shoot amateur pictures of the stunning man with legs either side of her hips since she would never tire of looking at his perfectly structured face and features that were God’s gift.

“Oi, ’m s'posed t’ be taking pictures of you, my love.” His hands found their way to his hips and she figured that, in that moment, he had never looked more adorable so the shutter sounded once more to signal that she’d documented the sight on the roll of film in the camera. “’M gonna need yeh t’ stop before I get rowdy.”

“Rowdy?” A loud guffaw sounded as she lowered the camera down to her lap and just merely glanced up at the mess of curls on top of her in disbelief and fond. “I’d like t’ see you try t’ get 'rowdy’, honey, you’re the most calm and collected person I know.”

As soon as she placed the photographic equipment to one side, her arms were pinned above her head by a strong force coming from her short-haired lover and before she knew it, she could feel his fringe tickling her forehead since he leant forwards and hovered over her.

“I can be rowdy when I wan’ to, yeh know that more than anybody, pet.” He lowered his voice down at least one octave as he spoke, a glint of mischief in his sparkling eyes.

“Mm…” She pretended to think as a borderline seductive hum sounded from her throat. “I have no idea wha’ you’re talkin’ about, H.” A shake of her head only further exaggerated her point as she tried to prove her unknowingness and innocence.

A low, breathy chuckle resounded from deep in his chest, seemingly-always-minty breath fanning over her face gently, before he pressed a loving peck to her plump lips.

It was intimate moments like these where she felt she had never been more content, nor could she probably ever be more content without him.

It was intimate moments like these where she felt almost certain that there would never be another man more catered to her soul as he was and she intended on keeping him forever.

“‘M gonna love you ‘til the day I die.” The soft whisper coming from his lips transferred onto hers and she could feel tingles rush throughout her body. “Ev’ry day I spend with you jus’ gets better and better, I don’t know wha’ you’re doin’ t’ me.”

A caressing touch was brought to his cheeks as she pulled his face up to stare into his emerald eyes. She never got tired of looking into the windows of his soul - she thought as if they held information about himself that was only revealed if someone was to gaze intently into them.

“And ev’ry day I spend with you, makes me wan’ t’ never live another day without yeh, you’re my world.” A grin started to grow on his features but she carried on before he had the chance to reply, fearing that if she didn’t tell him what she had wanted to for so long, she might never get the opportunity, nor courage, to again. “You, Harry Edward Styles, are the reason tha’ ev’ry morning when I lie in bed next t’ you, I wan’ t’ scream at how much I adore watching you yawn and stretch when yeh make that little noise to shake the tiredness off. You are the reason tha’ ev’ry night when we take a shower together, I wan’ t’ kiss yeh until our lungs give out because I don’t ever wan’ t’ stop. You are the reason tha’ ev’ry time when I see yeh performing, I wan’ t’ jus’ run up on stage with you and show ev’rybody there that you’re mine and how proud I am of you. Words will never be able to describe how much I’m smitten with you, Harry, you’re the most amazing guy ‘ve ever met and I’ll be damned ‘f I see another chick on your arm.” She had to pause momentarily as she felt a familiar touch wiping away a stray tear that had trickled down her cheek in the heat of her emotions before nervously laughing and continuing to finish her mini-speech. “I love you. I love you so fuckin’ much, I don’t think you’ll understand.”

The only response that was mustered from the tanned man was a shake of the head in disbelief at the meaningful moment that she had just shared with him, he felt a slight twinge in his stomach he couldn’t identify before placing his elbows either side of her head, careful not to rest on her sprawled out hair, and, once more, pressing his raspberry lips against hers in a passionate seal of affection.

He shifted his weight onto his forearms in order to place himself in between her bent legs without breaking their kiss and let out a quiet groan of satisfaction against her mouth. Her hands reached up to tangle in his cut curls, tugging on them lightly just as a teaser. He ended up cupping her behind as he pulled away from her soft lips to flip their bodies over to allow for him to be the one on his back and situated his woman on top of his hips, squeezing hers temporarily as an indication to keep kissing him.

And when has she ever refused him?

A small smile appeared on her face before dropping her top half down onto his chest and reconnecting their pairs of lips. Hands pressed to his firm chest as legs straddled his frame before trailing her fingers gently down to the hem of his shirt.

“Take it off, baby.” A breathless plea was heard from the man underneath her which gave her the boost of confidence she felt she needed which encouraged her to remove the first item of clothing from his toned body and she couldn’t help but run her hands up and down his beautiful torso. “Now le’ me see you.”

She raised her own top over her head herself and threw it somewhere unknown, just as she did his t-shirt, and revelled in his reaction to her reveal, noting the way he trailed his eyes up her exposed chest and bit his lip. “Look a’ you. My gorgeous girl.”

She felt the rose colour blush onto her cheeks, she thought she would’ve been better off as a traffic light, before she looked down to try and hide the obvious effect he had on her but was stopped by his forefinger lifting up her chin and guiding the other hand to the clasp of her lace bra, unclipping it expertly with a single movement, and looking at her intense eyes. “I never wan’ you t’ feel like you have to hide around me.” The straps fell down her shoulders as soon as she relaxed her arms to remove the piece of lingerie, giving her significant other a firsthand view of her bare chest, whilst he fondled her breasts generously and massaged them. “You’re beautiful and you’re mine, I wan’ yeh t’ believe it.”

Her head tilted backwards at the sensation of him having her cupped in his hands and lovingly playing with her as she felt a tweak on her left nipple and a wet tongue flick on her right. A short intake of air gasped from her throat in surprise at the sudden attention but she wasn’t complaining.

To show her gratitude, she found that her hips started to grind down on him - both their clothed crotches rubbing against one another, making them both let out a soft sound of appreciation.

“Wanna taste you…” She chirped after she had plucked up the courage to tell him while his mouth was still on her, alternating between each nipple.

“’M not stopping yeh, baby.” He spoke in reply as he detached himself from her boobs, giving them playful, but gentle, little smacks, and watched them jiggle slightly to his amusement.

By him taking it upon himself to lay back down, she took it as a sign to hop off him momentarily and hook her thumbs inside the matching lace material of her panties (she hadn’t bothered to put on bottoms - she liked wearing his shirts) before swaying her hips side-to-side. She liked to give him his own private show every once in awhile to watch him grow harder within the constraints of his jeans as he watched her.

Some could say she had a slight kink for exhibiting herself for him and she felt proud that he liked what he saw every time, enough to show off that cheeky smirk of his that she loved so much and bite his lip.

She successfully managed to drop the skimpy thong to the floor and stepped out of it, rendering her completely naked, whilst she crawled back onto the bed and in between his spread legs.

Her hand flew straight the the button of his skin-tight, charcoal jeans and pulling down the zip slowly, flicking her eyes up to see his face that construed his impatience. A light titter came from her lips as she begun to pull the waistband of the item of clothing down his legs and off his body teasingly, planting pecks down his thighs and legs in the process but intentionally avoiding where he needed her most. “God, sweetheart, please.” He started to beg, he couldn’t wait anymore. He felt painfully hard already and she wasn’t doing anything to relieve it - just make it worse.

“Oh, ‘m sorry, honey, I didn’t realise you wanted me so bad.” She feigned innocence with a pout of her bottom lip before she grinned mischievously and palmed him through his boxers.

The sudden attention to his most sensitive area made him rut his hips forward onto her hand with a half-arsed apology mumbled from him before a low groan erupted, interrupted by her reaching up and connecting her lips to his in a kiss as she continued to work him through the thin material.

As she felt a wet patch forming due to the pre-cum leaking from his tip, she concluded that there had been enough teasing so she pulled herself away from his luscious lips as his boxers followed suit with his jeans and were tossed aimlessly somewhere in the room.

Standing to attention, the red, aching head of his dick looked too enticing for her to ignore as she started to give him kisses and kitten licks. A small growl of approval from him gave her the confirmation she needed to then flatten her tongue against the underside of him and lick a stripe along him until she reached the tip, swirling her tongue around it like a lollipop.

A shiver was sent through his body as he looked down at his lover and gripped her hair in his fist. He watched her lips wrap around his, he must admit, larger-than-average size and take as much as she could fit in her mouth before she began to suck.

A strangled cry came from him as she unexpectedly opened up her throat and attempted to take all of him. As soon as her nose touched his trimmed hairs, he let out a yelp of pleasure since he felt himself at the back of her throat before she gagged, making the muscles clench around him which made it feel even more pleasurable.

“Shit, you take my cock so good.” That sentence alone was enough to make her feel on top of the world as she pulled off to catch her breath for a second, a string of spit still connecting her to him as he reached down to swipe it up with his fingers and proceeded to press them to her mouth, making her open up and taste him.

“You taste amazing.” She praised him back, knowing that it’ll give him the confidence boost he needed to really fuck her into the mattress soon.

After her regular breathing was regained, she, once again, dived back onto his pulsing manhood and begun to hollow out her cheeks around him whilst working her tongue around his girth but making sure no teeth were present as she bobbed.

Constant affirmations of pleasure tumbling from his bitten lips only made her move faster before she raised one hand to what she couldn’t fit in and expertly moved it in sync with her mouth.

“Fuck, if yeh keep goin’ like tha’, baby, ‘m gonna cum.” The warning was enough to convince her to pull off of him with a ‘pop’ and sit back onto her knees, looking down at him with a virtuous look on her face but with spit dripping down her chin. “You look sinful, yeh fuckin’ tease.”

She had to bite her lip to hide a subtle smirk and she kissed up his torso before sitting back on his hips, making sure to be just in front of his length so he could rest on her arse as she bent down to give him a passionate, open-mouthed kiss.

His large hands roamed her back as he reciprocated the kiss by pushing his tongue in, meeting hers. An enticing hum was let out as she circled her hips gently, rubbing up against his already throbbing cock. He pulled away only to duck down and start to press his mouth against her neck, beginning to suck bruises into her skin to mark her as his to everyone that looked.

Her tease only further continued as she heard him groan in desperation when she rubbed against a particularly sensitive spot before he decided he couldn’t take it anymore and threw her down onto the bouncy bed as he held himself up with his hands, adjusting to be perfectly slotted in between her legs that locked together around his torso as she ran her fingers through his hair that fell down.

“Harry?…” She spoke up in a soft voice and he could feel her breath on his face by how close they were.

“Mhm?” He reached down to position himself against her clit and began to jut his hips forward and back eliciting a high-pitched squeal.

“F-Fuck me.” She had the wind knocked out of her as soon as he entered her before she could finish her request.

Both parties let out loud moans as they both felt each other in the most intimate way possible. He let her adjust to his size impatiently since it took all of him to not move inside of her. The warm, wet walls of her womanhood drove him crazy and he swore he nearly came undone already when she clenched around him.

“You ready, honey?” He asked shakily, he just wanted to feel every inch of her.

A timid nod came from her a few seconds later signalling her consent and he wasted no time in dragging himself out until just the tip was engulfed before plunging back into her tight hole, encouraging another in-sync moan.

Gradually, he picked up a regular rhythm and fastened his speed as soon as she muttered the words, “faster” and “harder”. The sound of skin slapping on skin filled the air mixed in with their combined moans and groans.

“Yeh feel so good, so deep.” She plucked up the confidence to try her hand at some dirty talk he had never heard from her before but he had to admit, he felt himself twitch at her words.

“God, you’re killin’ me.” He shivered as he picked up his pace.

“Yeah?…” She smirked as she leant up to press her wet lips against his, moaning against them. “Fuck, Harry, don’t stop.”

Every word she said stroked his ego even more and it turned him on to no extent to get praise that he was doing everything she wanted. With a few more hard thrusts, he felt the familiar twist in his stomach.

“You gonna cum for me? You gonna cum for Daddy?” The nickname just slipped from his parted lips as he breathed heavily but it didn’t go unnoticed by her, making her let out an exaggerated moan to let him know.

“Mm, Daddy’s so good t’ me.” She paused to peck his lips once more before arching her back as he brushed against that special spot. “‘M gonna cum. Want yeh t’ cum inside me.” She whispered.

Never had she been so relieved she had decided to take up the pill since she never wanted to stop feeling this level of ecstasy.

Hearing those words whispered so filthily from her cherry red mouth tipped him over the edge as he released hard, surrounded by her squeezing walls, which in turn, caused her to become sensitive and orgasm with him still deep inside of her as they both yelled each other’s names in pleasure.

The only noises that could be heard was their heavy breathing and the parting of lips as they gave each other loving pecks, trying to come down from their highs as he carefully pulled out.

“You’re the best thing that’s ever happened t’ me, you know?” She rolled onto her side to face the man that collapsed by her side and cuddled up to him, tracing the watch she had given him as a second Valentine’s Day present. In fact, she had the watch that matched. It came as a couple’s collection, what could she say?

“I know, baby girl. ‘N’ I love you very much.” He replied tiredly as he followed her movements on the timepiece.

“I love you too.”

         Though, how was she to know that he told her empty promises and gave her false assumptions?

The watch she had given him? He had unexpectedly dropped the bomb on her that he had supposedly ‘lost’ it one day nonchalantly, as if he didn’t really care, after coming back from one of his never ending nights out.

She still had hers.

She never took it off since she bought them both unless she showered and went to bed.

She always put it back on in the mornings even if she didn’t have plans. She just loved having the strap to remind her of their love when he wasn’t around.

However, whenever they fought, it always seemed to her that he forgot to speak with an underlying tone of adoration like she did since she could never really stay angry at him. Always pinpointing the cons of the situation they were arguing about and making her feel guilty that she even brought it up.

But ever since she packed up and walked away from his hold on her, she figured that the only thing she was genuinely guilty of, was loving him too much. Giving him too much.

She gave him everything she had to offer and during the first few years, she thought it was enough for him to believe she was the woman he wanted to spend the rest of his life with.

It was only when she started to feel her grip on him slipping away from her that she knew she was his second choice. Something that she never wanted to be.


If somebody asks how we died,
Please look them straight in the eye.
Call it, “suicide”.
Don’t fabricate, just tell 'em, babe.
It was suicide.
Don’t sugarcoat it, just let them know.


         The two men stood conversing with each other as they discussed the art that was on display for the event they were invited to. They had been colleagues before; however, they had lost contact after one of them took up a new job opportunity, meeting again after a good year or so and decided to catch up.

The art gallery consisted of the most recent masterpieces from unknown artists around the globe. It was an event organised to give exposure to struggling individuals chasing their dreams and it was people like Harry and his status who were invited to review the artworks and buy them if they were impressed. All the money earnt from these purchases go back to the original artists, which in turn, correlated to more of said artists’ pieces being on display in the future.

The prices they were going for weren’t exactly the cheapest either.

“‘Ey, didn’t your girl wan’ t’ be an artist?” Obviously, the break-up hadn’t reached the likes of Harry’s newfound pal yet and it instantly wiped the smile off of his face.

“Yeah.” A remorseful chuckle was puffed out, “Yeah, she did…”

“Actually, where is she? Yeh should’ve brought her along, yeh idiot, she would’ve loved this! Las’ time I saw yeh both, you couldn’t leave each other alone.” The uninformed man stood next to him gave him a playful nudge and a wink of the eye without noticing the sudden deflation of his friend.

“She, uh… She’s not my girl anymore.” He finally confessed after swirling his drink in his cup as he was pondering whether or not to actually tell the man beside him.

“Oh, shit, H, I didn’t mean t’-…” He began to apologise for being so insensitive but was interrupted by a shake of a curly head.

“‘S all good, don’t worry ‘bout it.” His eyes cast downwards, losing the twinkle in his eyes as he tried to smile genuinely.

“If yeh don’t mind me asking, mate, wha’ happened? You seemed so happy.” A hand was placed on his shoulder roughly as a form of comfort as he sighed heavily.

“It just… Didn’t work out.” A dismissive sip of his beverage came afterwards as the guilt of brushing his four-year relationship off like it was nothing came creeping up on his conscience.

“D’yeh really expect me t’ believe that, Harry?” The questioning tone of the man that clearly didn’t believe his reason for the end of his relationship only made Harry feel even worse about his disregard and internally convinced him to elaborate.

“It was my fault.” He rubbed his hand over his face, he didn’t realise actually talking about it would affect him this much - especially in public. “I, um… God. I cheated on her.”

The recoil of the friendly hand on his shoulder signified the disappointment his friend felt towards him but kept his mouth shut, willing him to continue to explain.

“She was everything I thought I wanted, that I needed. I had no doubt that she was the woman I could spend the rest of my life with.” Harry painfully started to release his pent up feelings ever since she walked away from him the week before. “I still think she is, you know?…”

He trailed his sentence off like he was ashamed to admit his feelings. He felt as if he didn’t even deserve to mention her name, let alone keep thinking about their future together. He pulled himself together, though, he owed her character enough to explain the situation fully and not give people even the faintest idea that it was her that caused the death of their relationship.

“I ruined four years of the happiest times of my life, Nick, for nothing… It was ‘bout five or so months. It lasted for five months. It jus’ happened, I never wanted to jeopardise wha’ her and I had bu’ it was when she was away for one of her work trips.” He felt the water building up behind his eyes, ready to start falling at anytime but he had to get it out. He didn’t care if he was in public or not, it had been eating him alive not being able to talk about it with anyone. “I went t’ the bar her and I always went when we were free. We used t’ talk for hours about jus’ anything. Each other. Our days. Our families. Our future… How much we loved each other…”

He had to quieten his voice at the end otherwise he knew he would’ve burst out into ugly tears. Not like he hadn’t been doing exactly that ever since the front door closed of their shared home. Well. His home. He didn’t even think it was a ‘home’ anymore. She was the one who made it feel like a home to him and when she left, it was just a building in which he slept in every night. With all of her belongings gone after she had come to pick up the rest, catching him in his time of vulnerability when he opened the door where he hoped she would’ve been back in his arms within the hour, it was just a house. There was no warmth left within its walls; only faded memories he tried so hard to block out as he spent his nights with a skimpily-clad woman he didn’t even know the middle name of.

“I met her at that same bar and we jus’ got t’ talking. I told her how lonely I felt with the love of my life away for weeks over a few drinks I bought us. By the time she was running her hand up ‘n’ down my leg, I wasn’t in my senses and jus’ allowed her to. The first time she kissed me the same night, I couldn’t stop her even if I tried - I was so far gone. And I… I enjoyed it. It’d been so long since I actually held someone close, video calls and textin’ can only do so much, y’know? ‘Fore I knew it, I woke up the next morning in someone else’s bed and her naked body beside mine in the exact same state. All of it jus’ spiralled out of my control from there, she never stopped callin’ me for another hook up and I couldn’t bring myself to say ‘no’… I should’ve, I know I should’ve, I had a perfect life with the perfect girl but I guess, for a moment, I wanted something else. Somethin’ new.” He didn’t even attempt to hide his shame as he looked up towards the ceiling to keep the rivers that flowed in his eyes at bay.

“She didn’t even try t’ leave as soon as she found out. She told me she knew at the third month about wha’ I was doin’ and said she stayed t’ try and change my mind.” He brought a closed fist up to his mouth, refusing to break down in such a public place, and already receiving a few judgemental stares from passersby as he struggled to contain his emotions. “God, she tried t’ change my mind…” He weakly let out a breath. “She did ev’rything for me. Her attitude towards me never changed at all, she still loved me with ev’rything she had. The best girl I could’ve ever asked for was all mine and I didn’t even give her a second glance most nights when I climbed into bed with her after I came on another girl’s tits.” His sudden outburst of anger directed at himself brought unwanted attention from the few that surrounded him, earning some disapproving stares and shushes.

“Why don’t yeh call her, H? You’re in bits.” A piece of advice was given to him from Nick who stood silently throughout his whole rant. The reply to it, however, was a mocking laugh as Harry threw his head back.

“Would you forgive me if you were her?” He stared blankly at the artwork in front of him, they must’ve been stood there for 10 minutes at the least.

Once again, silence was the dumbfounded man’s only response to his rhetorical question, and that was all Harry needed to nod to himself as if he finally understood. That he finally let it sink in that his relationship was indefinitely over and there was nothing he could’ve done to make it better.

There was only so many tears he could hold in at that moment before he couldn’t physically keep his wall up and all the emotions came rushing through the floodgates of his distress and trauma.

He had managed to keep himself together for all of the times he had to inform acquaintances of his new relationship status by simply brushing it off and saying exactly what he had told Nick at the beginning. But it had become too much for the secretly heartbroken man finally, and there he was. Sobbing disgustingly into his hand as he tried to cover his cries up to leave at least some of his dignity remaining intact.

He had come to the conclusion that it was never what she had done. It was never what she had said. And it was never what he thought he felt; like he just fell out of love with her. But it was everything to do with the way she still loved him unconditionally after acknowledging his unfaithfulness to her and it made his heart hurt.

By realising this too late, he had to live with himself knowing that he pushed her too far off the edge and that he actually did love her after all.

He still loved her.

But instead of falling asleep to the sight of her radiant face - peaceful as she cuddled into his body, he had to tell everyone that he, himself, killed the best relationship he had ever been in.


He had to call it ‘suicide’.

A-Z NSFW: Chanyeol

Originally posted by porkdo-bi

Cr.

Donate | Masterlist

A = Aftercare 
If seeing Chan with the twins on RoS didn’t tell you how attentive and loving he is, I don’t know what else to tell you. He has a fucking check list to run through after sex is over to make sure you’re okay, if you’re satisfied, he’ll wipe you down or help you into the bath/shower and help clean you up, before returning to bed for a movie, cuddles, and a nap.

B = Body part (Their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s) 
Does it count if his favorite body part is his entire body? The man is twice the size of an average human in every way; his height is out of this world and his hands are like baseball mitts. With height, comes the fun of being able to tower over you, and basically cover you with himself, and have that good ol’ skin on skin contact, and surround you with his body. His favorite body part on you, however, are your hips. He likes how his large hands look in comparison to your body, how he can control your pace when you top, and how he can pin you down and have you at his mercy.

C = Cum 
Okay listen…Chan is the loudest when he cums, if y’all thought his deep rapper voice was heard during the sex, god forbid anyone’s around when he gets release. He’s tip toes into the mentality of a true dom a bit sometimes, not a lot, so more often that not he ends up releasing on your thighs or tummy, sort of a mark that you’re hisas if the 143 hickies don’t prove that

D = Dirty Secret (a dirty secret of theirs) 
Being the sneaky little shit he is, after one night you’d stayed over, and he woke up alone, he forgot you were in the dorm. The shower was running, so he obviously figured it was one of his members and when to pick the lock so he can pee and get started in the day. But of course, it wasn’t one of the boys, just your naked self showering peacefully. This being before you’d started being intimate, he just stood there and stared for a good minute before he silently freaked out, left, and never told you about it. Oops?

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)
Chan had a GF when he was younger, the little fucking about pissed himself laughing when D.O. was swinging that balloon thing and suddenly it looked like a dick, but when he had the gf, they were pretty young so I doubt anything happened. That being said, he’s a dirty minded boy with internet, so I’m sure he’s aware of what to do and what everything is.

F = Favorite position
Unless you’re a goddamn giant, height differences are going to be slightly an issue, not much, just a bit. Chan’s favorite position is him sitting against the back of the bed, and letting you have your fun while riding him. That way, you’re on the same level, and he may or may not be a slight sub so you topping really makes his day.

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)
Chan doesn’t have a serious bone in his body, do you really think he’ll be anything but a ball of embarrassing goofiness while his bone is in you?

H = Hair (How well groomed are they)
We’ve seen his tummy/abssoft tummy!chan for the winquite a bit, and we’ve definitely seen the happy trail, so he’s no where close to bare(who shaves/waxes their crotch and keeps a happy trail?), but he’s a pretty clean boy, with how much he dyes his hair, I’m sure he’s in the shower a lot, keeping the hair up and clean and whatever, I imagine while he’s there he manscapes.

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)
I think Chan is one of the most romantic members in EXO. I can’t remember what it was, but I think he was filling a jar with paper stars or something of the likes for his girlfriend when he was younger before they broke up, and he kept the jar. He brought flowers for his co-star on the movie he did in China as an apology for the language barrier, he’s just the sweetest boy ever, I can’t imagine that not carrying over into your relationship/sex life. He’s the boy that thinks movie romance is how it is in real life, he decks the room out in scented candles, mood lighting, it gets a bit weird when he plays some of his own music…but it’s Chan so we’ll let that slide.

J = Jack Off (Masturbation)
Chan’s the master of picking locks and getting in bathrooms with other members, so I doubt he’s worried about anyone walking in. The doors locked, he’s safe. Not that it matters, because the boy can’t touch his dick silently, it sounds like a freaking lion is loose in the house, every one knows Chanyeol. I feel like he’s a shower masturbater, like he’s in their washing his hair, cleaning, all that good stuff, and oops I’m rubbing my dick…might as well go the whole nine yards kind of dude.

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)
Don’t mistake his love for you riding him as him being submissive, no no no. Even when you top, majority of the time his hands are guiding and controlling your movement, he’s mostly the dom, of course though, there will be times he lets you have control but on the norm, he’s the boss. Chan’s not a daddy kink guy, he’s more of a yes sir, kind of kink man. 

L = Location (Favorite places to do the do)
The bed is the easiest place to do it, and honestly Chan’s kinda lazy lol. It’s just more comfortable, easier to handle(no risk of anyone getting dropped or hurt) and when it’s over he can just cuddle you into his chest and go to sleep. 

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)
He’s a begging lover, he love love loves when you beg for him. And honestly, he’s a sucker for you whining to blow off getting dinner or going to the movies, and stay home with you and have your own fun together.

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)
Maybe this was just because you’re a little shit to him, but he now, refuses to allow you to handcuff him. Shit went down when he let you take control one night, and handcuffed him to the bed, aaaaand you lost the key for a good two hours while he’s just trapped on the bed butt ass naked. Never again.

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)
Chan’s rapper tongue is no joke, aside from the fact that boy never stops talking, his tongue was designed by the gods for going down on you, especially since he’s too tired to just pound your brains out, he often spends a good time going down on you to give you the most pleasure he can give you. As for you giving oral to him, he certainly isn’t going to pass up being able to see you on your knees, eyes looking up to him, and your mouth open, obedient as always.

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)
Chan’s height kind of stifles his full potential, he’s somewhat slow but not unbearably slow, you know? He’s pretty rough though, and very thorough with his love making, you’re never left unsatisfied, that’s for sure.

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)
Over your relationship, you could count the amount of quickies you’ve had with Chan on one hand, they’re a very rare occurrence. He likes being able to lay with you and love you to the best of his abilities, and a quickie means all the fun gets cut out because it’s…quick…Chan’s not a fan of them at all.

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)
After an incident with dropping you during some good ol’ fashion wall sex, he’s hyper aware of how easy it is to get hurteven though you insisted you werent hurthe’s pretty conscious of the risks of different positions and places, so he’s really hesitant to try new things. He might need a bit of convincing to help him comply, but still, risks are far and few in between, he just doesn’t want you hurt.

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)
He gets winded easily, but that’s expected from a member of the royalty that is EXO, he’s working out all the time, practicing all the time, he’s pretty tired when he stumbles through the door, so one round is probably all he can muster up without a good four hour nap in between the next round. But that being said, he’s not tapping out until he knows you’re completely satisfied, if it takes minutes or a hour to get you all set, he’s down for the ride.

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)
The only toy-ish thing Chan owns is handcuffs. He’s not very big on toys, he’s the ‘i’m the best toy you have!’ kind of dude, you know? The only reason he delves into handcuffs is so he can work hands on when you’re being…squirmy.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
He’s not much of a tease, realistically he doesn’t have time to stretch it out, he either needs to be sleeping or flying across the world. Not that if he had time or not matters, he likes you two becoming one, he’s not one to mess around with teasing either you or himself.

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)
Chan has a loud mouth at any given time, he’s a very extra boy, so that definitely carries with him to the bedroom. Top that with his impossibly deep voice, at the very least you can hear the deep tone vibrating through the walls, but I’m willing to bet my leg the whole neighborhood will hear him cursing, grunting, and moaning for you. 

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)
He’s 100% dropped you by accident. You didn’t get hurt, thankfully, but it did end up with Chanyeol apologizing over and over and you just laying on the ground, laughing at how much of a flop you two are. That’s the danger of wall sex with a giant human, isn’t it?

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)
Okay…okay…We have seen that boy’s dick so many fucking times, with how much taller he is than me, and that fucking thing, it’s got to be the size of my fucking forearm, I’m not joking vv

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)
I don’t think Chan has a very high sex drive, he doesn’t pop random boners and humps your leg like a dog, no worries about that. Sex drive aside, he’s always yearning for you, he’s kind of a clingy puppy, he never turns down the idea or random thought to have a dance under the sheets.

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
Listen….this mofo actually crawled into a suitcase and went to sleep ?? He gets winded easily, I imagine he falls asleep fairly quick afterwards, but that’s all good, he’s worked you out so much you’re barely awake too. Just take a nap with him, y’all need it.