i wish my crush could see me

I'll Always Write Back [Connor Murphy x Reader]

Title: I’ll Always Write Back

Pairing: Connor Murphy x Reader

Fandom: Dear Evan Hansen

Requested: by the lovely @the-murphy-family

Summary: Connor and the reader are friends online, but then find out they’re neighbors too. The reader is homeschooled, so she has no way of hearing the rumors about him. They become best buds and hang out with each other everyday and eventually fall in love

A/N: This was waaaayyy longer than I wanted it to be, so my apologizes in advance. Thanks again to @the-murphy-family for such a fantastic prompt, I’m sorry I rushed the exposition so much. I had so much fun writing this! (If you aren’t already following their blog, I highly suggest it).

Warnings: Connor’s potty mouth | First person reader | Fighting Murphy siblings

It was almost bedtime by the time I’d messaged him. I hadn’t planned on it, by any means. We talked after I’d finished my lessons for the day–he’d skipped school, I saw, which I always thought was off considering his mother was home.

I’d changed into my pajamas–just an oversized t-shirt and a pair of boxer shorts–and had begun to tuck myself into bed when I saw him.

He’d left his blind open tonight, and through the window screen I could see him silhouetted perfectly, all the lights in his room blazing. It was nearing 9:30, so I wasn’t too shocked to find he was still awake. The houses were so close together on this side of town and, from the second story window, there was nothing but a four yard distance between our windows–and a drop nearly twice that length.

He was sitting on the edge of his bed, staring straight ahead, giving me a view of his profile, the sharp angle of his jaw, the thin slope of his nose, and the hard jut of his adam’s apple.

 What startled me enough to give pause was the fact he was unnervingly still, unblinking, staring at something I couldn’t see. He wasn’t working on homework or painting his nails or playing that silly candy crush game on his phone. He was just staring.

Too far away for me to make out his expression, I instead rolled over onto my bed, clicking the lights back on and pulling out my phone, opening up the Chat app we used on the daily.

To: Connor
From: Me

What’s up, buttercup?

I wished I could see him–there were certainly nights we sat by the window and messaged back and forth, but starting out that way would mean he knew I saw him lost in whatever pensive state he’d been in, which more often than not would mean he’d be less than willing to talk. In my lap, my phone buzzed to life.

From: Connor
To: Me

Isn’t past your bedtime or something? 

I snorted, starting my own reply before:

From: Connor
To: Me

Are you having trouble sleeping again?

Swallowing thickly, I immediately replied:

To: Connor
From: Me

No, I’m fine. Just bored, checking to see if you were too :)

I tried to wait, give Connor a moment to compose whatever turmoil he’d been sitting in before I asked how he felt, otherwise I’d get a swift ‘okay’ and the conversation would take a dive bomb south at ridiculous speeds.

From: Connor
To: Me

If it’s nudes you’re looking for, sorry to disappoint, but I’m not in the mood tonight, kiddo

I choked, lunging forward in the bed to muffle my embarrassing squawk into my fist. Thank goodness my bed was out of sight of the window, or I’d have to watch Connor chortling at my less than appropriate reaction to his less than appropriate joke.

Connor and I had only been talking for about two months now, after I’d moved out here five months ago. Well, we’d been talking for nearly the entirety of the five months, but I’d only realized it was Connor not all that long ago.

To: Connor
From: Me

Oh no, whatever will I do without seeing your sculpted, rock-hard abs??? ;)

From: Connor
To: Me

Shut up, jerk off

I cackled into my fist, careful to not wake my siblings that slept in the next room over. It had taken a large amount of time to get used to Connor’s rather blunt personality, to put it pleasantly.  He’d always been candid, of course, ever since the first contact I’d had with him on the Chat app (“You swear you aren’t a pedophile, right? Or my dad? That’d be weird as fuck.”) and it had been thrilling to be with someone so open and ready to talk about things. The way he felt. The things he thought. The fact he was afraid.

We didn’t exchange photos for a long time–and I’d never seen Connor outside the house, other than the on and off times he’d flit across his bedroom window like a haunt, never knew his name–but the second his photo flashed on my screen, I knew. Even in the photo he hadn’t been smiling, the same stoic countenance he always wore.

He’d recognized my photo immediately, and had been less than thrilled. It took convincing–a lot of me showing up at the fence between our yards, very nauseous, promising it hadn’t been a mean joke–but he came around.

From: Connor
To: Me

You sure you’re good? You’re quiet

I smiled softly at my phone screen. It was a rare night when Connor had enough energy to be so concerned about others–it wasn’t his fault, I knew, he was just in a bad spot right now. The fact he could consider my feelings for more than a few moments felt remarkable, flattering. But, most importantly, it meant he was doing okay.

To: Connor
From: Me

I’m fine, pls don’t worry :)

To: Connor
From: Me

Are YOU okay?

From: Connor
To: Me

I’m fine, chill out

I rolled my eyes, unsurprised. Deflect and distract, his usually strategy.

From: Connor
To: Me

Can’t see you rn


From: Connor
To: Me

Come to the window

I sat up quickly, going over to shut out the light to blur my image to him. Combing my messy hair with my fingers, I tugged on my oversized shirt so that it covered my mostly exposed legs before throwing open the window and leaning out.

Connor, across the way, had already thrown his window open and was halfway leaning out, his face scrunched in confusion. He tapped something out on his phone, pausing every so often to tuck back the dark locks falling into his face. His other arm was braced on the window ledge, the sleeve of his hoodie pushed up to expose his bare forearms to moonlight, glowing a soft snow hue in the dark. My phone buzzed as he glanced back up at me with an open expression.

From: Connor
To: Me

Turn on the light, dumbass, I can barely see you

I smiled up at him, putting my phone aside to shake my head ‘no’. He frowned, slumping down a little more against the window, his chest pressed to the ledge, before holding his arms up in a 'why not?’ and flipping me the bird.

I typed out a quick response to let him know that my parents thought I was asleep. I watched him read the text, watched his eyebrows furrowed over his deep-set slate eyes, saw him frown, heard him swear under his breath. I bit back a chuckle as he carded his hand through his hair in frustration several times.

I vaguely wondered why this made so little sense–most of our conversation up to this point had been centric of me, but Connor was visibly frustrated (not that he wasn’t frequently) and earlier he’d seemed much to absent to not be upset about something. My phone buzzed to life, casting a blue glow across my face, and I saw Connor’s face stretch in recognition, pleased to make out my expression in the dark.

From: Connor
To: Me

Meet me in the pool house

My heart jackhammered in my chest at the thought of it–sneaking out. He was crazy, he had to be. He knew my parents would murder me for being up this late, let alone sneaking out, and worst of all, meeting a boy.
Not just a boy. Connor.

I felt him watching me from across the divide, at the edge of my vision and could make out where he leaned against the window, propped up on his elbows and head in his hands, hair hanging in his face. Glancing up, meeting his stony gaze, I nodded.

It was immediate, earning a reaction from him. Biting back my chuckle, he scrambled up from where he kneeled against the window ledge, his whole face smiling as he ran from his window without looking back. He was already standing in his backyard, waving wildly before I’d even departed from the window.

I decided against redressing or doing my hair–Connor was waiting and the quicker I got out there the quicker I got back without alerting my parents to my absence. Besides, it was probably too dark in the pool shed for Connor to make out my bare face and frizzy hair anyway, let alone the hair on my legs and the stretch marks on my thighs. As if Connor had the nerve to look to begin with, I snorted.

Sneaking out was surprisingly easy, and Connor had left the gate cracked just enough for me to slip in between. The door to the pool shed–just a small building, hardly smaller than my bedroom, at the edge of the yard–was slightly ajar, and I saw quick movements coming from inside.

Once in the doorway, clicking the door shut behind myself, I heard a sharp intake of breath behind me.

“Connor?” I called, spinning in the dark so that my back rested against the door, ready to exit if necessary. My eyes searched the dark frantically–in vain. There was a small window, vaguely fogged from years of neglect that allowed a slim moon beam to shine in on a small pile of towels and blankets, a little bean bag chair. Connor had told me not too long ago he and Zoe hadn’t played in here for years, which meant it held secrets long forgotten by either of the Murphy children. I felt honored to be inside it.

“Hey,” he breathed, and though I could see him, I recognized his soft voice just to the right side of me, breathy and soft. It’s too dark to make him out, and I noticed he’s careful not to touch me, but I can feel his breath against my ear, warm despite the fact it’s chilly for a June night. I felt goosebumps pimpling along my legs, making the hair stand up on end. I silently thanked the universe for giving me the gift of darkness to veil myself in.

“Feels like it might rain,” I sighed, turning toward the sound of him, the warmth. My bare arms brushed something–maybe cotton, maybe not–but it pulled back immediately away from me, accompanied by a quick intake of breath.

“Christ, don’t talk about the weather,” Connor hissed into the dark, a hard thunk resonating through the shed where he must have leaned his head against the wall, a bit too forcefully. How very Connor of him. “That’s the kind of shit my dad says in the car when he acts like he’s uncomfortable to be near me for more than ten minutes at a time.”

“Sorry,” I muttered, leaning away, and turning to gingerly pick my way across the shed–it was getting late now and I was already beginning to get tired. Connor may be able to stay up until the early morning hours, but I definitely couldn’t be trusted to be awake at eleven.

“Fuck, don’t be sorry, I just meant–shit,” he growled, and I heard another sharp pang against the steel inside of the shed–he’d hit something with his fist, if the metallic clink of what I assumed to be his ring against the sheet metal was any indication.

I stumbled my way to the beanbag chair, collapsing, and letting myself sink into. It smelled a little like chlorine and sun-in hair dye, but it was soft and warm, almost the size of a double bed. I wiggled upright, squinting again to see Connor in the dark now that I took up the only patch of moonlight in the building.

“You aren’t feeling alright, are you?” I asked softly, resting my cheek against the faux suede of the chair, struggling to keep my eyes open. There was a pause.

“That’s not why I asked you over,” he sighed in his tennor, stomping across the room, picking his way, until he flopped down beside me, displacing the insides of the chair and nearly rolling me out of it.

He reached forward with another soft swear, grabbing my shoulder blades to yank me back onto the bean bag bed, rolling me close so that I wouldn’t fall again. I laughed, unsure what was so funny–maybe it was the fact I’d nearly catapulted out of the chair due to all five pounds of Connor “Ribcage” Murphy, or the current situation, my face pressed against the soft cotton of his hoodie, his heartbeat steady and strong against my cheek. I didn’t move away.

To my surprise, Connor didn’t move away either, just kept both arms wrapped around me, hands firmly in place of my scapula as if scared to dip any lower. I felt the dip of his chin against my temple, felt his lips against my scalp.

“Aren’t you freezing?” He whispered, rubbing quick circles between my shoulder blades.

“Quit dodging my question, Con,” I hissed, beginning to pull away before Connor tightened his grip–surprisingly strong for a boy with such lithe wrists.

“But you are cold,” he muttered, slipping one hand down from my shoulder to my bare arms, rubbing in quick patterns there, attempting to make some sort of friction between us.

God, my parents would kill me if they saw me now.

I want to he clear I wasn’t under any pretenses–this wasn’t, er, Connor hadn’t called me out here so that we could, well–

“I’m fine, Connor,” I promised, taking advantage of the moment to fold my arms against him, trapping them between the heat of our bodies, letting my cheek rest idly against his chest. Connor didn’t like me, I knew, but in the dark shed…well, it was easy to pretend.

It was always easy to pretend to be someone else with Connor.

“You wanna talk about what’s going on with you right now?” I said with a false bravado, thumping his chest lightly with my fist. “You can’t hide anything from me, Connor Murphy. I know you too well.”

“You don’t know anything, dumbass,” he grumbled half-heartedly, and I felt him lean forward to press his face into my hair. “You don’t know shit.”

“So you’re lying to me?” I baited with a smile, tapping his chest, feeling his frustrated sigh and rewarding him with a light laugh. “I didn’t think so. I’m here for you, you know.”

“I know,” he growled, sighing heavily, taking one hand off my back to push his hair away, before letting me go entirely to roll onto his back. His thin fingers covered his face, the black fingernails scratching frustratedly against his pale face. “I just–I don’t, I don’t know how to–shit.”

I leaned forward to tap his chest again, letting him know I was here. “Just talk it out. I’m not going anywhere, I promise.”

He shocked me by reaching forward with one hand, knotting his fingers with my own and letting them linger against his chest. I was grateful he couldn’t make out my expression from his position, grateful for the fact he couldn’t feel my face flush. I’d never been this close with a boy in my life, and Connor knew that. He wasn’t being fair, and I was sure he knew that too.

Unless he didn’t. Connor had a bad habit of selling himself short. I bit back the urge to press a kiss to his bony knuckles.

“I know,” he whispered, voice suddenly hoarse. He was worse than I thought. “Um, it’s harder now? I guess. I trust you–I mean, I always trusted you. It’s um, it’s harder because the anonymity is gone, I guess? I’m worried now that you know who I am–what I am–you’re gonna get bored of me?”

I didn’t laugh this time. His voice was thick and rapid as if he couldn’t hold back the word vomit, like he’d been holding it back for a while. My own throat felt thick, and I couldn’t contain the guilty feeling in my stomach. I rolled forward, wrapping my arms around his thin waist, feeling his hip bone press against mine sharply. I was careful not to look at his face–it’d shut him down for sure.

“Connor…I need you just as much as you need me, you know that right?” I whispered, trying too hard not to let him hear the panic in my voice.

“I know,” he rasped shallowly, sounding oddly wet. He was crying, I realized stupidly. My heart constricted in my chest, my stomach dropping. He was in pain and I had barely noticed. This was all my fault.

“And even if I didn’t need to vent, if I didn’t need your support, I’d still talk to you because I like you, Connor. You’re my friend. You’re a good person,” I whispered.

“Shut up.”

“You are,” I continued. “You’re a great person and you’re always looking after me, even when you’re hurt. I’m so sorry you’re hurting, Connor, I’m so sorry I didn’t notice–”

“I’m not hurting! Shut up!”

“Shhhh,” I hushed, sitting up to remind him to be quiet. “You’re parents are gonna–”

His face was red. His nose and lips were swollen, wet, and his cheeks, flecked with silver freckles glowing lightly in the moonlight beam he laid in, and there were tear tracks running from the corners of his eyes.

“Connor,” I cried softly, reaching up to wipe his cheek. “Please–”

“Shit, I’m sorry,” he sobbed wetly, hands folding up to cover his face. “Just fucking get out, okay? This was a mistake.”

“Hey, hey,” I soothed frantically, reaching up to pet his hair, hoping that it might make him unfold himself. “I’m not leaving until you tell me what’s wrong. I’m gonna help, Connor, whatever you need. I want to help you, please.”

“I’m not your responsibility, kid, okay? You can leave. Stop looking at me, Christ.”

“No,” I sighed. “Look, if you don’t wanna talk, that’s okay. That’s okay. Just, let me stay, okay? I’m not judging you, I’m not gonna leave, I promise. I’m here for you. Let me be your friend.”

He shook underneath me, holding in sharp sobs. I wondered how long it’s been since he let himself fall apart like this, let himself have some kind of catharsis, let himself feel, period.

This relapse was good. It was under control. I was here. I had him.

“Okay,” he whispered finally, reaching up to tangle his hands in my hair. “Christ, just–don’t tell anyone, okay? Don’t laugh.”

“I won’t,” I promised. “I’m not. I’m here, okay? You don’t have to talk.”

“Okay. Okay…thanks.”

I might have imagined it, as I lowered my head back to his chest, might have imagined in between the soft presses of his fingers as they moved in and out of my, might have imagined, just briefly, the feeling of his lips pressed against my hair.

———-

The next morning was awkward. My parents and siblings showed no knowledge of the fact I’d snuck out to see Connor last night–it wasn’t as if they weren’t aware we were friends, to my parents chagrin and the Murphys’ delight, but I didn’t need them to think we were involved in some sort of torrid tryst, especially one we weren’t even having.

I left a few hours after Connor had slowly ceased his wet and much needed lament and his breathing had turned into a soft snore. I untangled myself from his arms, and leaned back for awhile to watch him sleep, tried to ignore how angelic he looked, red faced and weepy with silver freckles glowing mutely in the patch of moonbeam.

I’d sent him a quick text to let him know I wanted to return before my parents woke up, let him know I’d be by the next day. Told him to  message me if he wanted to talk again.

Now I was waiting for my mother to finish grading my papers for the day so I could to see Connor, who didn’t have school today thanks to some silly teacher institute, lucky loser. The American school system was a joke, to be quite honest.

“You’re jumpy,” my mother noted, scribbling something in the margins of my paper without looking up at me.

“I was gonna ask if I could go over to the Murphy’s? I haven’t talked to Zoe in a long time,” I asked sheepishly, scratching at my arm.

“And Connor, hmm?” My mother hummed thoughtfully, giving a smirk to my workbook.

“Connor’s cool,” I said honestly, nonetheless feeling a guilty lump rise in my throat.

“He’s a good boy,” she mused. “He always helps me with groceries if he’s outside.”

“Which is never,” muttered one of the younger kids, earning a kick under the table from me. My mom just smiled softly.

“Go ahead, honey. Call if you’re going to be longer than an hour.”

I thanked her, nearly sprinting out the door, my twin braids slapping against my back as I skipped between the yards. Zoe was at the door before I knocked, leading me into the kitchen, announcing me loudly in a way that would’ve earned a talking to at my house.

Cynthia appeared in the doorway, looking radiant, albeit a bit tired. Her face smiled brightly at me.

“Honey! It’s so good to see you, it’s been so long since you’ve stayed for dinner–Larry, tell Connor she’s here!–Zoe’s missed you, you should stay the night, right Zoe?–Larry, call Connor–Would that be alright with your parents? Stay for dinner then stay the night? I can run out and rent some movies and snag a pizza–Larry!

Zoe just rolled her eyes, yanking me down the steps past her mother and into the basement. Her grip on my arm was vice like, almost painful and definitely excessive. Her pretty red hair blew up in my face, making the already dark room even harder to see through the haze of her auburn locks. She practically shoved me onto the couch, following me by slamming down beside me.

“Zoe–”

“I saw you last night.”

My pulse hammered in my throat, and I felt all the blood rush swiftly to my face, making me dizzy.

“What?”

“I saw you. I told Mom. I don’t think Dad–”

“What do you mean?” I gasped, throwing my hands between us. Zoe blinked rapidly.

“You and Connor. In the shed. Last night. Christ, it was only ten, you could’ve been sneaky about it–”

“Zoe, we didn’t do anything,” I pleaded. God, if the Murphys knew, they’d tell my parents–

“You don’t really expect me to believe that, do you?” She sighed, pushing her hair back out of her eyes. “Whatever, okay? You don’t have to tell me, I don’t give a shit as long as you aren’t pregnant. Just–because you’re my friend, I want you to know some things. Are you gonna listen?”

I thought better than to argue with Zoe, so I nodded shyly.

“Look, I know you and Connor are friends. That’s fine, whatever. But you don’t see Connor at school. You don’t see Connor here, not really. Not what he’s like when you aren’t here.”

I felt my heart constrict. She was going to try to convince me to stop talking to Connor.

“He’s mean. You don’t think it’s weird you’re his only friend? He’s a bully. He’s lazy. He’s violent, Christ–he’s my brother, I love him. But you shouldn’t…you shouldn’t take him seriously, okay? One day his temper is gonna flip and you’re gonna be in his way.”

I blinked, stunned that Zoe would say something so slanderous about her own brother.

“I don’t understand,” I said softly, staring across at her. It was no wonder Connor was so upset, why he had to reach out to strangers on the Internet to vent. His own home was a war zone.

Zoe sighed heavily. “You aren’t at school. You don’t hear the rumors. You don’t see the things he does. If you wanna be friends, fine, but…be careful. I wouldn’t let him anywhere near your heart.”

I didn’t argue with Zoe–I thought better of it. So I just nodded.

“Thanks for, um. Thanks for the warning,” I said with a thick voice, struggling to maintain sincerity.

“You’re welcome,” she sighed. “Mom thinks you’re dating. She’s over the moon. It’s disgusting.”

“I thought you thought we were dating,” I pried, raising an eyebrow. Zoe rolled her eyes, hitting me with a deadpan expression.

“As if Connor could ever get someone like you. As if Connor could even feel something remotely close to love–I’m half convinced his chest is an icebox,” she laughed dryly.

“Talking about me, are we?”

We both spun, wide eyed to see Connor on the stairs, arms folded.

“No, go ahead, I’ll wait. I love hearing stories about myself. Tell me again Zoe about how I’m in love with her?” He hissed, making my face burn red in shame. I felt awful for letting Zoe talk about him that way–worse because Connor made it painful clear he didn’t reciprocate any feelings I might’ve had for him.

Wait. I didn’t have feelings. Connor was a friend. A good friend. A friend who needs me and who doesn’t deserve to be taken advantage of, not until he’s okay. Not ever.

“Never said that,” Zoe said with a smirk, rising from the couch gracefully. “But keep digging your grave, it’s fun to watch.”

“Fuck you,” he growled.

“Fuck you,” she grinned. “I’d love to watch your train wreck love admission, Titanic is on, and at least that story has a happy ending.”

Connor kept a white knuckled grip on the banister as she passed, as if holding in an urge to push her. He kept his blazing eyes downcast, and noted his pale cheeks were burning red.

“What’d she tell you?” He whispered once the door slammed.

“Nothing true,” I promised, leaning forward on the couch to make room for him, patting the seat beside me. “Nothing that changed my mind.”

His head snapped up, and I watched his expression go from rage to disbelief to awe before he descended the stairs, shaking. He stopped before the couch, as if scared to come near me, staring down in awe.

“What did my mom say to you?”

I shook my head. “Not much. She asked if I could spend the night. Only if you want me to, though.”

He laughed, but the smile didn’t quite reach his face. “Only if I want you to, Christ, where did I find you?”

“The Internet,” I reminded, earning another laugh.

“Of course I want you to,” he sighed, finally coming to sit beside me. “Of course I want–”

He cut himself off, surprising me, before slinging an arm around my shoulder. I stiffened, but eventually melted against him, reminding myself that it was just Connor.

“You wanna watch a movie? I hear they’re playing Titanic or something.”


——

It’s two am when I wake up, taking a quick mental assessment of where I am. There’s a soft blue glow burning my eyes, shining over what appears to be a nest of blankets piled roughly on the floor.

The Murphy’s basement, I realized with a jolt, I’m just at the Murphy’s.

I’m in a pair of Connor’s pajamas–Zoe’s clothes don’t quite fit me right–an oversized black shirt and a pair of sweats Cynthia brought down in a laundry hamper. My braids have long since come loose, the desperate curls tangling wildly around my head.

Beside me, Zoe is snoring, almost comically, every so often a nostril whistles in time to the soft sound of Dexter’s Lab playing on the tv.

There’s a hand, dangling just above my head. The pale fingers were curved artistically, the nails too short as if they’ve been bitten recently and the black nail polish chipped hopelessly. It’s attached to an arm, long and thin, almost angular, and up farther is a shoulder, bare, pressed against a red coffee stained couch.

Connor.

“You’re awake,” he whispered in a conspiratory voice, but when I sat up to make contact, there’s no sly smirk. He’s frowning. “You are having trouble sleeping.”

I shook my head. “Stop worrying about me, Connor.”

“No,” he rasped, sitting up on the couch. I avoided looking too long at his bare chest, but regardless indulged nonetheless.

“You haven’t been sleeping,” I noted, coming to sit by him on the couch. He immediately opened the blanket, giving me room to slide in beside him, before throwing it around both of us so we could settle back against the couch. His bare skin was warm, and I let him take both my hands between his, letting him rub my hands between his in an attempt at some warmth.

“Been thinking too much,” he sighed softly. “Don’t worry about it.”

I swallowed, beginning to feel the effects of sleeplessness and helplessness melt together in a fatal concoction.

“I can’t help if you don’t let me, Connor,” I reminded him, pressing closer. “Let me help. What are you thinking about?”

He leaned away, as if I’d burned him, dropping my hands into his lap and looking away, the thin muscle of his cheeks hollowing as he clenched his jaw. “Can’t say.”

“Connor,” I pleaded. “Please let me help. I want to. I’m begging.”

“No,” he growled. I felt tears beginning to build, to my own horror, behind my eyes.

“Connor, can you just–”

You.”

It was an explosion. We both froze, turning in horror to glance at Zoe, waiting to breathe until we heard the soft whistle of her nose again. I turned slowly, terrified back to Connor. His eyes were wide, and if I didn’t have my fingers wrapped around his knee, I swore he might try to run.

“Me?” I asked softly, careful not to wake Zoe. Connor pursed his lips, his jaw twitching nervously.

“Fuck, yes, you, just–shit, I didn’t wanna say that–”

I leaned away, watching Connor’s face contort farther.

“I’m sorry,” I whispered heatedly. “I’m sorry if I did something wrong. You want me to go, right? I’m really sorry, Connor–”

“What?” He nearly yelled. “You think–fuck.”

His head ducked, to my great surprise, against my shoulder, pressing his face into the crook of my neck and, of all things, began to laugh.

“Connor–”

“You think–Christ, it’s like you aren’t even real. You think I’m mad at you?”

He pulled away, his face no longer red or swollen, just smiling softly at me, almost awe struck, and staring intently with his slate eyes.

“I…I’m not sure?” I whispered, but not feeling at all nervous when Connor snaked his hands gently up my arms again.

“You’re perfect,” he whispered suddenly, shocking me. “And you have no idea that you’re perfect. Christ.”

I frowned. “Connor. I don’t…I don’t think I understand.”

But he was still looking at me–eyes scanning slowly over my face, landing suddenlyhalf-lidded on my lips, and it suddenly all clicked into place. Why Zoe would warn me. Why Cynthia acted the way she did. Why Connor was so scared in the first place.

I remember Zoe saying how over the moon Mrs. Murphy was at the idea of Connor and I dating–because that meant Connor would have me. It meant Connor would be happy.

It meant I would have Connor.

It was like a sudden dam had broken open inside me, filling me with more revelations as Connor’s hands lifted to cup the back of my head, his eyes soft, scared, and asking as they met mine. I let a quick exhale before I surged forward, slamming out mouths together much too forcefully, and not at all enjoyably.

I laughed–much too loud–but Connor kept back to the task at hand, his eyes closed in concentration, swallowing my outburst and folding me against his (very, very bare) chest and kissing me deeper, slower. It was painfully obvious he didn’t know what he was doing, but so much about the kiss was still tender and important, warming me from my core outward until I was scratching to wind my arms around him, getting him as close to me as I possibly could, kissing back to make sure he knew how much I wanted this. How much I wanted him.

How much I needed him. Anything he needed, I’d give him. Now and forever and–

“If you two are gonna fuck, can you do it in the bathroom or something? I’m trying to sleep.”

Connor and I pulled apart–causing me to stumble backwards against the arm of the couch gracelessly and staring at Zoe as she rolled over with her back to us.

I dared a peek back at Connor, whose lips were pink and wet despite their dry skin splitting with the force of his wide, wide smile.  His eyes were glowing brightly, almost burning as he raked them over me. The flannel blanket was pooled behind his back where it had been wrapped around us, and he just simply opened his arms again, inviting me back. His pale chest–pock marked with freckles, clusters on his ribs–was striped with pink lines from where my fingers had raked in a desperate attempt to give him validation.

I crawled forward, pressing my face against his neck in a hazy attempt to bring my breathing back to a normal speed.

“You okay?” I asked, running my fingertips over his shoulders, fighting the urge to word vomit an unholy collection of questions about who and what we were. Connor Murphy, post kiss. Connor Murphy, still life, smiling with wet, swollen, bloody lips. Connor Murphy standing at the edge of happiness, jumps over the ledge.

He nodded against me, fighting with his own dark curls where they made an attempt to cloud my cheeks in an adoring way. Cute, I decided.

“Okay? I’m,” he sighed, laughing and wrapping his arms around me to squeeze tightly. “I’m…you have no idea.”

“Better than nudes?” I teased. He snorted, embarrassed.

“I’m positive. Although–”

I hit him.

“Okay, kidding! Jeez…” he pulled away, cupping my face lightly, pushing the hair back out of my eyes like I was a child. It felt fantastic, he was right, as I searched through the galaxies in his eyes, his pale skin illuminated by the hazy blue glow of the television. It felt so far past amazing, being held like I was the only person he knew how to see. He cleared his throat, and I saw his eyes were brimming with an emotion I couldn’t name.

“You, uh,” he laughed nervously under his breath. “You have to know I love you.”

It was a startling blow, knocking all the air out of me and forced a bubbling laugh to fly out of my lungs. Connor’s smile wavered slightly, so I popped up to press a soft kiss to the cleft of his chin.

“I know,” I sighed, giddy with the realization it was true. “I know. And you know I trust you more than anyone. You know I love you.”

It was like watching him crack open, the way all the uncertainty was cleared from his face, a wave of joy and triumph.

“You love me?” He asked so softly, so awestruck, I felt my heart shake in my chest. I’d barely started to nod before he surged forward to kiss me again, small and chaste pecks across my face and neck, the bridge of my nose, my temples.

He was okay. We were okay. We were going to be just fine.

10 reasons why you should stan Pentagon

1-Have you fucken heard their voices?

If heaven…or honey… or maybe even a sunset could have voices, I’m 101% sure it would sound exactly like Pentagon’s voices. I’m aware that if they are k-pop idols, they must have nice voices. But in the case of Pentagon… It’s as if God’s took the voices of a thousand angels and transferred those into Pentagon’s members throat. Am I exaggerating?  11/10 universe will agree.

Here’s a compilation of my favorites solos and voices of pentagon!

E’dawn: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B3Iqd-AhjQE
Kino: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7YjQSyADihQ
Hui & Jinho : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_GIPgm8nJ30


2- Genius composers

Ok let’s be real. Every single one of their songs are bops, and some of them were written by Pentagon’s members. Hui, E’dawn and Wooseok are writers and composers that put their hearts and soul into their songs and it makes them even more touching. In their new EP (Ceremony), the song “To Universe” was written by Hui, E’dawn, Wooseok and Yuto. It makes it so genuinely pure-hearted that Pentagon are the one that wrote this special song to their Universe.


One of my personal favorite is “Thank you”. You know, those songs that you hear for the first time and you just cry? Or the songs that you share with all your friends because it is just, so beautifully executed. “Thank you” is one of them.


Can we also talk about this magnificent poem from Yan An, it’s truly wonderful. A work of art. Wisdom in its purest form. Enjoy.

“Hey, my love Julie.
I’d like you even if you were bald,
Even a crew cut is fine,
I’d like you even if you were sweet like sugar,
It’s fine if you are salty like salt,
In the end,
You’re still my girl,
Pentagon member,
Yanan’s girl.”

Thank you:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_GIPgm8nJ30
To universe: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q00W_9iFJ1c

3- KINO GRINDING ASDFGHJKL

OKAY I’M TIRED OF BEING SO SENTIMENTAL OVER PENTAGON LET’S ENJOY THIS VIEW

. I don’t know how I can explain how I felt when he launched this sex-bomb at me… Should I make a meme?


Me when I get a F in class : “idc”
Me when I have to walk and its raining af : “couldn’t care less tbh”
Me when there a nuclear bomb exploding next to me: “boring”
Kino grinding : ASDFGHJKL THE NO IN KINO STANDS FOR “NO BOY YOU CAN’T DO THAT”

I can’t find the gif so here is the link to that grinding hoe’s performance:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7YjQSyADihQ

Originally posted by pen1ag0n

What sorcery is this? how can a cute boy like him grind this vigorously?

4- The relationship between Hui and E’dawn

*I ain’t shipping anyone*

Hui and E’dawn have always been best friends and their relationship is definitely goals! I’m not lying, E’dawn even got Hui a friendship ring during pentagon maker. (The fact that it was saying “I love Dawn” made me choke on my coffee tbh). The chemistry can easily be sensed from thousand miles away. And that time when Hui had to choose between two groups, one with E’dawn as leader and one with Jinho as leader. He looked so torn apart by the decision! He still took part in E’dawn team (obviously).

Their time in Triple H surely made their bond stronger! They had loooooooooots of fluffy times together in the making of the “365 so fresh” MV!

Originally posted by yoongkaii

5- They had the very first survival show that didn’t trigger me and made me want to throw myself from the 6th floor

Produce 101 who? No mercy who? MIX&MATCH WHO??? Never heard of those. My only religion is Pentagon Maker. Seriously though… *SPOILER ALERT* They started with 10 members “fighting” to earn their places in Pentagon and can debut and ALL 10 OF THEM WERE ABLE TO DEBUT! How super cool is that? The only thing I did watching this show is laugh, laugh and laugh again( and cry a bit lol)! I didn’t have to worry about Idol having their dream crushed in million pieces #fuckmnetamIright.

6- They have the prettiest and most genuine smiles.

Is there a need to add anything else? Oh yeah! I need to add a signature at the end of my certificate of death.

Originally posted by ptg

Originally posted by yeo1

Originally posted by won-an

Originally posted by kinorth

Originally posted by kinoed


7- E’dawn in general, I just can’t get over him.

He. Is. Jus. So. Fucking. Weird.


Don’t sue me, he is the cute/hilarious/perfect kind of weird but like… sometimes you sincerely wish you could see what’s going on inside his head. Because from the outside, he looks like a huge mess.


Scared Dawn:
E’Dawn: “I’m not scared of anything” 

*2 secs later*

E’dawn: AHHHHHHHHHH * Makes ultrasounds*

Here is different side of E’dawn:

Cute Dawn:

don’t mess with E’dawn:

Originally posted by organicdawn

Weird E’dawn:

Originally posted by yeo1

E’down/ E’dead inside/ E’Done:

Originally posted by yeo1

8- Jinho is a level 1000 stealth master

They don’t call him “small hyung” for no reason! He is so small that during performences when he is in the back, we can barely see him. Even cameramen can’t seem to get accustomed to his stealth technics. Still, I’m probably 102% sure he doesn’t appreciate being call small and cute all the time since he is still a hyung. Since he probably won’t see this… He is so cuuuute!

can you see him? me neither. (He is behind Hui I think idk either)

9- Scaredy cats

Yuto is scared of the dark.

Shinwoon is afraid of animals.

E’dawn is scared of water (He can’t swim).

Here is a scared Shinwoon for you.

This gif in slowmo makes the dog look so much more scary even tho it looks so fluffy oh lord it’s really funny.

10- Yuto came straight out of a manga

- Japanese


- Played baseball for 6 years


- Unimaginably handsome


- Deep voice


- Tall


- More cool than cute (He says he can’t do aegyo)


If a mangaka release a manga based on Yuto, I swear I’ll sell everything in my possession to buy the entirety of mangas.

Originally posted by yeo1

***I’m not only saying this because he is Japanese***


Bonus: Jinho and Wooseok height difference


Originally posted by ptg

First Meeting

I’m so in love with this picture! Why is he so beautiful?! Urgh!!! I’m sorry for the very bad ending but I hope you still like it! Picture is not mine!!


“Hi! How are you (Y/N)?” Ellen Degeneres inquired after she had welcomed me on stage with a tight hug and asked me take a seat on the very comfortable sofa behind me.

“I’m fine, Ellen, how are you?” I questioned back, adjusting my position on the sofa. I was quite nervous and excited though. This was my very first interview as a newcomer actress and my very first where I was not accompanied by another co-worker of mine. I had been on a few movies before but only as a supporting role, so the characters that I’ve portrayed were kind of irrelevant. But this time I played one of the main characters of a new movie which was going to be published in a week.

“I’m good! Thanks for asking! It’s a pleasure to have you here!” She said, offering me a warm smile.

“It’s an honor to be here, Ellen. Thanks for inviting me!”

“No problem. “ The cheers and clapping back from the audience started to die down.  “So, you’re making a very big step into your acting career now with your new movie that is coming out next Friday ladies and gentlemen. Tell me, how are you feeling about it?” The blonde woman asked.

I leaned back and rested my slight sweaty hands on my lap before I began to talk.

“I am very excited to be honest. This movie is definitely one of the best that I’ve worked in and I could prove myself in it, showing people that I’m worth playing a main figure. My character was a big challenge for me and I’m glad that I was given a chance to demonstrate my acting skills. The director I’ve been working with has supported and encouraged me so many times and I owe him a lot.”

“Can you tell us anything about your character?”

“Uhmm…  Her name is Ellie and she is absolutely the opposite of me. She’s tough, strong, willing and very confident. She has an aura that intimidates people and makes them feel uneasy when she’s around. I adore her. She is very loyal to herself and lets nobody drag her down. Playing her personality was very funny and adventurous and I can tell that I have learned a lot from her and about her. I hope you guys are going to love her as much as I do.”

Ellen continued asking me questions about the movie and after a while she suddenly changed to another topic. A very sensitive topic if I may say so.

“I’ve heard you have a major crush on Harry Styles? Is that true?”

The air around me become slightly warm and I felt a deep blush appearing on my cheeks. Nevertheless I tried to appear calm even though my interior was screaming out of embarrassment. The audience started to cheer as they noticed my speechless state that I had for a moment. I faced Ellen with a desperate look and a nervous smile.

“Why is everybody asking me that question?” I buried my face in my hands. In another interview I had a few days ago I unintentionally dropped the fact that I fancied Harry Styles because I loved his music and since then I was constantly asked about it.

“So you like him?” Ellen questioned.

“I think- I mean…” I stuttered, but then inhaled deeply and continued talking. “How can you not like Harry Styles? He’s amazing.”

“What is the first thing that comes to your mind when you hear his name?”

I thought for a few seconds. Should I tell them what I connected with him and make a complete fool of myself in a national TV show? Harry would surely see this interview, there is no way he couldn’t.

“Well… To be honest with you, I think he’s an angel.” The last few words came as a whisper out of my lips. I heard a few whistles from the audience and some of them even called “yes” or “yeah”.

“I mean, he has an amazing personality and he has a huge heart. The message he tries to spread all around the world is inspiring and I have never seen a human being such as Harry in my entire life. He is a great role model for every single one of us. It is just sad that some people are using his kindness and good intentions for their own advantages. I think he should be respected and left alone, especially by the media.”

“Very nice words, (Y/N). I’m sure he’d appreciate what you said. Have you met him yet?”

“No, unfortunately I had not the privilege to talk to him but I hope I’ll get the chance soon. It would be dream come true.”

(From here 3rd person POV)

If she had known how soon their meeting would be. What (Y/N) didn’t have an idea of was that her celebrity crush was backstage and watching every single moment with a smile on his lips. He recognized her from his favorite movies she was involved with and even though she had no bigger role in them, he grew some liking towards her. The beautiful actress instantly gained his interest the first time he laid his eyes on the TV screen, seeing her pretty face and he was as excited as to meet her as she was.

When Ellen asked him to surprise her, he did not hesitate for a second and said yes to her plan immediately. The whole audience was involved, especially asked not to make any sounds when he appeared on the stage because he didn’t want the surprise to be spoiled. He wanted to memorize her expression when they made eye contact for the first time in real.

So while she was babbling further nice things about him, Harry slowly shoved the curtains aside and as soon as the audience discovered his presence, he laid his forefinger on his lips to shush them. With slowly and quiet steps he moved forward to a future relationship.

(back to 1st person POV)

I was happily talking about Harry, not caring about anything anymore and Ellen listening to me as my eyes suddenly were covered by foreign hands and my vision became dark, preventing me from seeing anything.

“Huh, who’s that?” I asked surprised.

“Guess who?” I heard Ellen’s voice a few meters away from me.

“You have only three chances.” The person covering my eyes whispered in ear and their warm breath caused thousand tingles in my body. Who the hell should I know who he or she was?

“Uhmm… I have no idea?” I replied, totally inferior to the situation. “Can you give me a hint?”

Desperately, I put my hands onto the persons to uncover my eyes but he or she would have none of it. He or she would have their hands firmly on my eyes, of course without hurting me. Ellen and the audience would laugh at my tries to remove those hands and I slightly got more annoyed. As I tried for another move, I noticed that the person wore a lot of rings when my fingers brushed softly against theirs and my heart accelerated instantly.

“No…” I whispered at my recognition. Only one person would wear an amount of rings on their hands but that one could never be the one I had in mind. No way!

“I’m hearing?” Ellen said.

“H-Harry Styles? Is it Harry Styles?” The audience cheered and clapped loudly and the hands let go of my eyes, resting gently on my shoulders. I turned my head back after my vision was clear and as I saw him smiling friendly at me, my body froze for a few seconds.

“’ello Love!” He greeted, his dimples fully on display while he smiled widely.

“No way!” I called over and over.” No way.” Then I looked at Ellen who grinned at me knowingly. “Did you set this up, Ellen?”

“Of course, I did.”

“I really have no words. Wow.” I said, but smiled. I stood up to give a hug to Harry and as we both laid our arms around each other, I felt safe and secure. The scent of his cologne hit my nostrils and I noticed that he smelled so good.

“Hi nice meet you!” I replied once we pulled away and he took a place next me.

“The pleasure is all mine!” He said, exchanging a few phrases with Ellen before everybody turned their attention towards me again, probably looking for my reaction. What can I say? I was dumbfounded beyond imagination. I couldn’t believe I was sitting right next to my celeb crush who had his fingers placed on mine.

“Harry what do you think of (Y/N)?” Ellen asked him with curiosity.

“I think she’s very talented and an amazing actress. I can’t wait to see her recent work. Congratulations on your new movie by the way. I’m very excited for it.”

“Thank you. “ I answered while blushing. “I’ve heard you first solo tour was a huge success? I wish I could have been there!”

“I think I can arrange something extra for you.” He winked at me, making the warmth in my cheeks increasing more. I surely was red like a tomato by now.

We chatted a bit more with Ellen and when it was time for me to go, I thanked her for the nice surprise she had made for me and went backstage. I was talking to my manager Helen when Harry approached us.

“(Y/N)?”

“Yes?”

“Uhmm… I was wondering if you had time to have dinner with me? I know a fancy restaurant you would surely like.” He sheepishly massaged his neck as he looked at me. “We could get to know each other and maybe you can tell me more about yourself?”

“Sounds good to me Mr. Styles.”

“Please, just Harry. Of course your friend is always welcomed to accompany us.”

“Thanks for your offer Mr. Styles,” Helen said. “but I’d rather not disturb you guys. You may have lots to talk about and I don’t want to be the third wheel or something like that. (Y/N) can go, she has no more interviews for today.”

I mouthed her a “thank you”, completely appreciating what she had done.

“Alright, Harry, lead the way.”

We walked out of the studio to spend a night that no one of us would ever forget. Thanks to Ellen, I finally met my celebrity crush, my best friend and my soul mate.

My brother’s best friend || 3 D.H.

A/N: HERE’S THE THIRD PART! i’m glad my brother is not that overprotective tbh haha. 

Word Count: 1.4K

POV: Reader

MASTERLIST // PART ONE // PART TWO // PART THREE // PART FOUR

Originally posted by listenm8

The door was pushed open. The sudden light hurt my eyes. After they had adjusted to the stinging brightness I could clearly see my brother’s angry expression.

“What the hell are you doing?” He shouted wide eyed, staring at the both of us.

It was more than obvious what Dan was here for. He still had one arm slung around my waist and we were awfully close.

I blushed in embarrassment and just wanted to hide behind Dan’s tall figure, but we had to talk this out. I guess I should’ve talked to Phil about this early but I never thought that there was a chance that Dan felt the same way. Now it was too late and my brother had to find out that his little sister and his best friends had feelings for each other the hard way.

“Phil, I’m sorry. I should’ve told you about my crush on Dan.” I apologized, but Phil ignored me.

His eyes had gone cold and he was glaring at Dan. Full on death glare.

“Mate, we didn’t know this was gonna happen-“ Dan started before he got cut off by Phil.

“Get your hands off my sister.” He hissed. I never thought that Phil Lester, the angle on earth, could be that threatening.

“Woah, hey Phil calm-“

“I said get away from her.” Phil growled, causing, me to unwillingly take a few steps away from Dan.

I swallowed hard, I had never imagined Phil to be that mad.

“What makes you think that you can just fool around with my little sister!” he shouted, completely forgetting that I was in the room.

“I asked you to pick her up from school, not to sneak in her room at night!”

The two boys were now dangerously close. Phil was intimidating like I had never seen him before.

“Could you please calm down. We are just two people who like each other okay?” Dan didn’t take a step back although his best friend was nearly pushing him.

At the mention of “we” Phil seemed to realise that I existed too.

“So you like him.” He questioned me unbelievingly and the look on his face made me wish to be able to deny his statement.

Instead I simply nodded and took a step towards Dan again. The tall brown haired boy was about to take my hand in his, but he stopped in the middle of his tracks as my brother cleared his throat as a warning.

“When were you gonna tell me that you are fucking around with my little sister, Howell?”

Phil would normally make sure not to use explicit language, but he really didn’t seem to care anymore.

“I wasn’t fucking around with her, mate!” Dan complained, getting mad as well. Their chests were by now nearly touching and I was scared that one of them would eventually hurt the other.

Both of their eyes were formed into slits as the air was full of tension.

“No? Well then what were you doing? In the middle of the night in my sister’s room?” Phil acted like he was thinking hard, provoking Dan even more.

“Look, we just found out we like each other today. It’s not like we have been hiding this from you for months.” Dan explained in an attempt to calm Phil down.

I was really thankful for the fact that Dan always keeps a clear head no matter how heated the situation may be.

“I don’t care, okay? She is still my little sister.” Phil shouted as his angriness reached another peak.

“Yes, but she is also old enough to date whoever she wants to date!” Dan retorted, wrapping his left arm around my waist. This time not even Phil’s death glare could stop him.

I blushed when Dan mentioned the dating part. He actually wanted to date me. He wanted to be my boyfriend. If the situation hadn’t been that awful I would’ve jumped around with glee.

“She can date, but not you.” Phil hissed with so much finality in his voice that it was scary.

My eyes widened in shock. As I grasped the meaning of his words. He was forbidding our relationship in all honesty.

“That’s not fair!” I shouted outraged.

Dan was right, I was old enough to make my own decisions.

“You are right. Well sometimes the world just isn’t fair, okay? Dan needs to keep his dirty hands of you!”

“He is your best friend. You’d give up your left leg for him, but as soon as he shows any interest in me you suddenly act like he is your archenemy.” I retorted. Phil wasn’t making any sense. He just couldn’t deal with the fact that I had my own life.

“I said no, Y/N. “

“Phil, you can’t stop us from being together. I really like her, I don’t see what’s problem with that.”

Dan was desperate by now. We had never thought that it would be that difficult.

“My problem is that you two dating is not a good idea. You are older than her, you are way more experienced than her, I know your history with girls as well as your intentions and she is my little sister after all! She’s a taboo for you. Got it?” Phil growled his words were final and we knew that nothing we could say could change his mind. Not now. He needed time.

Dan opened his mouth to say something, not giving up that easily but I stopped him by squeezing his hand that I was still holding.

“Thank you for trying, Dan. I don’t think fighting more now would change something. Let’s talk tomorrow.” I whispered, deeply looking into his chocolate brown eyes.

Dan’s eyes softened as he nodded.

“I should leave, shouldn’t I?” he asked.

Before I could answer Phil had already shouted “Yes!”

10 minutes later Dan’s car left our drive way. It was around midnight and I wished he could stay, but I don’t think this house could bare that much tension. I watched him make his way down the road from the kitchen window until his car took a scarp left turn and wasn’t to be seen anymore.

I felt exhausted like I had just worked out for ten straight hours. I was worn out. After the high I felt because of being with Dan I felt dull now.

I let myself fall on my bed face first and couldn’t stop the tears from coming anymore. The hot salty water ran down my cheeks. Dan had feelings for me. He wanted to be my boyfriend but Phil ruined it all. Why was my brother suddenly so overprotective? There was no reason to act like that!

I decided to finally call one of my best friends. She was good at giving advice and she had already helped me with a lot of relationship questions. She was also the only one I had talked about Dan with, she knew I had a major crush on him.

She picked up after it ran a few times, sounding tired. I had probably woken her up and immediately regretted my decision to call her because I felt so bad.

“What’s up?” I heard her say but I couldn’t answer instead I sobbed into the speaker of my phone.

“Y/N, are you okay?” she sounded far more awake now.

I wished she could see me nod so I wouldn’t have to speak. Eventually, I stuttered a few words and she seemed to understand.

“I’ll be at your house in ten minutes.”

Just like she promised her car stopped in the drive way ten minutes later to get me. Since my room was on the ground floor I only had to climb out my window, no heights or jumping involved. I needed to have a long talk and comforting words as well as ice cream right now.

When she started driving to her house I was glad to distance myself from my brother who I normally loved to bits….

“Dan, where is she?!”

Phil shouted into his phone at 1 am. He couldn’t find a way to sleep after being so harsh and rude to his sister and his best friend. He just wanted to apologize, but when he walked into her room it was completely empty.

“Who?”

“Y/N, obviously.” Phil snarled, getting nervous.

“Have you checked her bed?”

“She is not home.”

“Well, she is not at my place either!” Dan couldn’t keep his voice down.

Panic.

Different Kind of Punishment.

Summary;Y/N get’s detention for not doing her homework again but Mr.Hemming’s has a different kind of punishment for her. 

word count;800 

Message me if you would like part 2! 

Part 2 will contain sex just a little warning! 

I hope you enjoy this, i had this in my notes and decided i would post it

Y/N Pov

i knew getting involved with him was a bad idea but now i can’t help it.

it was never meant to be like this.

I got detention, nothing knew there.

But something changed, he didn’t look at me the same. I thought something was up with him but i never thought having sex with him would change everything.

I am in love with my teacher and there is nothing i can do about it.

He ignores me every chance he can get and he asked if i could transfer English class.

it’s not fair,but he’s married.

his words to me that night were “i love my wife, i want to make it work”

i never expected it to happen like it did, but who knew detention would lead to having an affair for 4 months with a teacher, a married teacher.

The sex was great, better than i had ever had.

i’m 17 years old and have had 3 boyfriends in high school so i wasn’t a stranger to sex, i have had it plently of times but i never had that feeling i had when i was with him.

nobody knows about not even my best friend Lucy. She would freak out if she knew,she had a crush on him but i never really did until that day.

it has been really hard not having anyone to talk to, i could talk to him but he won’t talk to me.

Yesterday at School just as the bell rang for home time i saw her, his wife. She’s beautiful, everything i wish i was. She has long blonde hair, the body and the face. No wonder he loves her, no wonder he want’s to be with her over me.

They were high school sweethearts he told me, he had the biggest crush on her since Sophomore when he was at school, he talked about her like he still had a crush on her.

It broke my heart, but it was my fault for asking him about her.

Things haven’t been working out in his marriage the last couple of months, anyone could see that at school. He wasn’t himself, always arriving late to class, clothes not ironed and he looked angry like he had just been arguing with someone. Which was probably his wife.

I guess that’s why we kept having sex for four months, i was his escape.

he made me feel special. Yes the sex was rough but sweet.

I really thought he liked me, i remember the first time.

4 Months ago..

It happened on a Wednesday but days before i could tell something was up with him. He stared at me more than he should have, when he passed my table i could feel his hands touch me longer than it should have.

By Wednesday.. i was convinced maybe he liked me but i thought it was just my crazy thinking.

I got to class early because i wanted to see him,it was quiet when i walked in. Mr. Hemmings was just going through some marking when i entered. He looked up and then looked down not saying anything, i thought nothing of it and then i just sat down on my seat.

“Well looks like i’m the first one here again” I mumbled to myself as i tilted my head slightly hoping to get a reaction from him or even a sound.

“SHUT UP” Luke shouted dropping his marking on the table making them spread all of it and fall onto the ground.

He walked around his table angrily over to me, i thought he was going to shout at me but next thing i know his hands are on my waist pulling me up to stand on my feet.

everything happened so quick. i didn’t have time to think or to even breathe and then he spoke

“You need to shut up you prick teasing little bitch”

i was so shocked by his words..

I never thought he would ever speak to me like that and the tone he used aswell shocked me more than anything,but i couldn’t help but feel turned on. It wasn’t a tone he would use when he was shouting at a pupil in class, it was like a dominant voice.

But how am i a prick teasing little bitch? I don’t walk around with my skirt up to my arse, i don’t unbutton my top for him in class, i’m just a normal pupil.

What have i done?

i was about to speak to try and calm him down but he spoke again “ You’re going to listen to me and not speak. The rules are;

Rule 1;You only answer with Yes Sir, No Sir"

Rule 2;Don’t ever call me by my name”

and Rule 3;Never speak of this to anyone"

“Do you understand Y/N” he said

“Ye sir” i spoke.

What is he going to do now..


So guys i hope you liked this, i wrote this ages ago so i’m sorry if it’s shit!

I was going to write the smut part and then post it but i’m going to see if you guys like it or not first. 

Message me or comment if you would like me to continue this. 

Until next time 

thankyou 

Love Morgan xxxxxx

2

Name: It is… a pleasure. Part 2
Pairing: Mycroft x reader
Summary: after the reader expresses her interest in Mycroft (rather subtly), there is some silence, as Mycroft prepares to make the next step, and he never is not serious enough about anythgin. This thing exists thanks to the people that said they wanted it, so thank you!

(Part 1)

“Sherlock, good afternoon,” your peaceful day was suddenly interrupted with the calm voice coming from the common room. You stoop in the kitchen, and Sherlock answers something, you can’t hear what. “Brother mine, I am here to talk to your roommate, not you. My sources informed me she is at home today,” Sherlock doesn’t even try to deny that, as everyone knows how good Mycroft’s sources are. A second later, Mycroft walks in the kitchen, looking just as perfect as before - perfectly ironed shirt, black suit, the tie that is casual enough to let you breathe but serious enough for you to remember who you are breathing next to. And the usual umbrella that he is holding his right hand. “Y/N.”

“Mister Holmes!” and there you are, sitting in front of the British Government (you asked Sherlock to tell you more about his brother) in the most casual clothes you ever owned. And the mess on your head. Definitely the worst way to meet such a… well, he is not even a human being, as far as you know.

“Y/N, it is Mycroft,” he corrects you again. “How are you doing?”

“Very embarrassed at the moment,” you answer honestly and try to fix whatever it is on your head. Seriously, you look like his intern that is too messy to deal with anything than a person that the Holmes would willingly come to see. “And how are you?”

“A bit worried about France,” he sits down on one of the chairs next to you (you honestly hope it’s not the one Sherlock tried to destroy a few days ago) and smiles. “I am sorry for barging in like that, I probably should have called.”

“Yeah, it would help us with that,” you wave your hand in the air, meaning the differences in your status. “However, this must be exactly how your kind of people see my kind of people, so…”

“My kind of people?” he sighs. “What did Sherlock tell you?”

“Only that I was stupid enough to try and awkwardly flirt with the British Government?” you ask quietly, blushing like a tomato. “And given that I am terribly bad at that, I would really appreciate if you just forgot it ever happened.”

The silence just hangs in the air. It gets rather uncomfortable, but neither one of you says anything, until you finally find the courage to look at Mycroft’s face.

“Why… Why are you smiling?” on yes, not only are his lips doing the movement of ‘smiling’, but you can see that happy expression in his eyes and the very wrinkles around them.

“Because I came here to ask you to have dinner with me. Forgetting about it is definitely not part of my plans, and you are… I find it amusing to see you blush,” he answers simply. 

“People just text to ask someone out,” you find that you lost your voice at a very bad moment.

“Mycroft Holmes is not like all people,” you are pretty sure that Mycroft is enjoying your confusion and surprise, as he hands you an actual letter on an actual paper with an actual wax seal with an imprinted emblem of (as you think) the Holmes family. Or, more probably, just Mycroft Holmes. “If you open it, the time will be used more efficiently.”

“Yes, sir,” you obediently open the seal and take out the paper with golden letters extruded on it. The writing is elegant and a bit hard to read, but you quickly skim the lines. 

Mycroft Holmes would be honored if you, miss Y/N, agreed to spend an evening in his company next Sunday at 7 pm. 

Sir Mycroft Holmes

“I tried to make it sound less old-fashioned,” Mycroft admits quietly.

“I didn’t know you are also a sir,” you answers just as quietly, only now understanding that not only you flirted with the British government, but you were seen as a worthy option for him. For some weird reason.

“I am also a lord, I just thought you would then get way too scared if I write that,” you nod quickly. “So, what will your answer be?”

“Why?”

“I delivered it myself because I wanted to see your face when you opened it,” Mycroft smiles. “It was worth it.”

“No, why are you inviting me somewhere? I mean, I am so much younger, I am so much more childish, I am so messy…”

“I know all of that, I had you followed.”

“I am… You what?”

“I had you followed to make sure you are exactly who you say you are,” Mycroft folds tips of his fingers together in front of his face, just like Sherlock does. “You are. And that is why I am here and not in a meeting. You are absolutely spontaneous and natural, and I haven’t had a lunch with such a real person in a very long time, that’s all.”

“So you want me to…”

“It is just a dinner,” something in Mycroft’s eyes is telling you that it is not - he is too serious, and he looks just weirdly, especially the way he looks at the every feature of your face. “I want to learn more about you.”

“You probably have cameras in my room, don’t you?” he doesn’t answer, and you literally crush your head on the table. “And why say you want to learn more about me if you already know more than I do?”

“I want to see who you are as a person.”

“I am just a usual person.”

“No, Y/N, not any more,” he sighs. “I had a full background check ran on you. I had you checked and re-checked,” you raise an eyebrow. “Because you are perfect.”

“I am what now?”

“You are perfect,” Mycroft repeats calmly. “Absolutely perfect, I could not wish to meet a better person. I do not care that you are younger. Or that you are naive. Or that you are messy. Or that you watch TV series, while I am working. Or anything from what I got from my sources. You are special.”

“That sounded almost like a declaration of love, Mycroft Holmes. Be careful,” you try to turn it into a joke. He smiles.

“Just have dinner with me. Get to know me. I know you want to, you told me so.”

“That was before I learned I tried to flirt with the British government!”

“And that is what makes you so special,” he slowly raises his hand and gently touches your cheek, then tucks a curl behind your ear. “You want to know me… for me.”

“That is because you look so damn well,” you answer quickly.

“We both know it’s not true.”

“Oh, come on! You know you look perfect,” you murmur, slowly realizing that Mycroft never removed the fingers from your face, so he is simply playing with your stupid curl that doesn’t want to stay calm. “Mister Holmes…”

“It is Mycroft.”

“It’s Lord Holmes because your brother said you are not a type of person that desires romantic relationship, and my dreams include being with a person that likes me and not just… finds my history clean enough to deal with me.”

“I forgot how difficult relationship is,” Mycroft sighs. “I do like you. Now just stop being stubborn and have the dinner with me. If you don’t like it, you will be back here in no time.”

“Do I even have choice?” he smiles softly. “Fine. Yes, I will have dinner with you.”

“I am glad,” he gently takes your hand and holds it for a few seconds before softly kissing your fingertips. “I will see you next Sunday then. Thank you.”

“Mycroft?”

“Y/N?”

“I am a really weird person.”

“I know,” he nods and smiles. “It does not scare me off, if that is what you were hoping to do.”


Does anyone want part 3? I am not sure if this one is as good as part 1, but I really like the way it goes… So, yeah. Part 3, anyone?

Colton Ryan/Olivia Puckett DEH Review

Major Plot Spoilers ahead.

Wow. Honestly, just wow. I’m staring at the screen trying to write this and am still at a complete loss. For what it’s worth, this was my first time seeing the show. I’m seeing it four times while I’m in New York, but this was my first. I’ve been watching the video for as long as I can remember and haven’t gone a day without listening to the soundtrack. I’ve heard Colton’s audio as well as Michael Lee Brown’s and had no idea what to expect going in to this performance. With that being said, nothing could have prepared me for this. I have heard so many reviews regarding the two understudies the past few days and wasn’t sure what to expect out of Colton, but he stole my heart, crushed it to pieces, squeezed it into a mess, only to put it back together again in the finale. This boy is not getting enough credit for his talent. After seeing all of the MLB reviews and Colton reviews, I was left in awe of his performance. This guy deserves all the things, and I wish I could give them to him. He definitely deserves consideration for when November roles around. When he did Evan’s opening monologue, it was fast. Very fast. Almost faster than Ben’s and to the point where if you weren’t paying attention, you probably missed something. I felt right at home. This of course leads into AHAM and this is the first chance we have at seeing Olivia’s Zoe. (HOLY COW!!!!!) Her portrayal of Zoe was SO different from Laura’s. Mike Faist seemed to have more of a joking tone with her and their opening interaction seemed less hostile and more of a normal sibling dynamic.
This then leads into Evan asking Alana to sign his cast as she tells him about her summer. I thought that Colton looked very anxious and uncomfortable and you could see him fighting with himself as to what the right thing to say to her was. Will of course stole the show immediately when he came on stage and continued to do so throughout. His performance wow’d me and is so much stronger in person than any video could do justice.
Cutting to WTAW - and just wow. I was left speechless. I believe Colton was losing his voice (he seemed hoarse at the beginning of the show but once his vocals warmed up - he nailed it) but this just made the performance even better for me. You could hear the desperation in his voice as he sang and especially when asking “Is anybody waving, back at me?”. His interaction with Olivia was textbook perfect. He was so nervous even I was uncomfortable for him but Olivia was genuinely apologetic that Connor had shoved Evan and seemed upset at the fact Connor was like this. At one point in the song, Colton chased after her waving and she paid him no attention and his face was absolutely heartbroken (I started crying here and never stopped). Heading in to the WTAW reprise in the computer lab, Colton looked devastated when Heidi calls and says she can’t come pick him up and so pained when she asks how his day was. Even he was crying during the reprise and this is something I wasn’t expecting.
Olivia in For Forever showed a side of Zoe I had never seen. She looked so sad as Evan sang and I felt terrible that these happy memories of her brother were ones she didn’t have. (JLT’s performance and breakdown during this song - OMG!) Colton’s chemistry with the Murphy’s seemed natural and only grew as the show went on.
Sincerely, Me is one of my favorite numbers and seeing it in person was AMAZING. Because of Mike and Colton’s off stage friendship, this on stage performance was incredible. Colton mouthed the words he was typing in the emails as he was doing it and this just made the whole thing more realistic to me.
OLIVIA CAN FLAT SING. Requiem is not normally a song to leave me in tears, but the emotion in that song did me in. Zoe was so heartbroken and couldn’t even bring herself to read through all of the emails. I thought at one point she was going to break down trying to sing it but you could see the tears in her eyes. I loved how it seemed more painful and heartfelt.
Colton’s If I Could Tell Her normally gives me goosebumps but with Olivia on stage? I was speechless. They have natural chemistry and it looked so natural every time they were together. When Evan kisses her at the end, she didn’t seem angry, just shocked.
Disappear was wonderful as well and I felt like I got to see so much more of Jared’s character development when he tries to make an input to the Murphy’s and Evan shuts him down. This is something that doesn’t translate in the boot or audio versions for me.
You Will Be Found was where I lost it and didn’t recover. There was something so raw during the speech and watching him crumble on the floor. As Nic mentioned, Colton held on to Connor’s tie for dear life and was audibly crying before he could manage to look out at the crowd again and continue. Hearing Colton cry and look so broken made me want to jump the stage and give him a hug. Michael Park’s breakdown made my dad cry and I had to look away to control my sobs. He fell to his knees and JLT had to come help him up as he pulled her into a hug. When Zoe saw this, you could see her eyes tear up and when she sang and spoke to Evan at the end, she was crying about having her brother back. Once again, Colton and Olivia’s chemistry was off the charts. When they kissed, she wrapped both her arms tight around him and he her and they were both holding on for dear life.
Break in a Glove is a song I find necessary for the show but haven’t died to listen to on repeat. However, the dynamic between Evan and Larry here is SO good. They were both glad to have someone to share this with since they missed out on it when they were younger. Evan looks so hopeful and Larry looks so excited to share this and it was beautiful.
Only us - UGH!!! Olivia nailed this. She was so gentle with him and looked at him so lovingly and Evan looked so enthralled by her. She did indeed kiss him more than one time throughout the song and whenever they were close enough, she was touching him. In the end, Colton pushed her down onto the bed and it looked like the most natural thing in the world.
Good for you was just SO good. Jared’s heartbreak, Alana’s hurt, RBJ WAS CRYING and everyone else was too. Colton looked traumatized that he was going through this and the emotions on his face were painful.
Everyone talks about Colton singing words fail well and they aren’t wrong. This performance left me shaking with sobs and the girl beside me who had no idea about the performance going in, clutching on to my arm and crying. There was so much emotion on the stage at one time I didn’t even know how to handle it. Zoe was crying, Cynthia was sobbing, and Colton was just so so so broken. He kept pulling at his hands and at his chest like he was hurting and he would mouth i’m so sorry in between lines. I made eye contact with him during this song and felt sorry for him because I was sobbing harder than he was.
I didn’t even have time to recover before So Big/ So Small. Rachel Bay Jones was crying so hard and at the end of it, Colton threw himself into her lap and buried his face. He was completely off the couch and into the floor with his arms wrapped so tightly around her I don’t know how she could move. She held him so close and held his face in between her hands. When Evan finally pulls away, he looked like it was the last thing in the world he wanted to be doing.
And of course, I cried through the finale because it was over and it was the most beautiful performance I’ve ever seen.
Overall, I would say, after hearing so much of the OBC and the audios, Olivia blew me away. Completely. She was absolutely incredible and gave me so much more to Zoe that I never knew I needed. Colton stunned me and stole the show. His vocals were wonderful and in the parts where he struggled made it all the more real to me. It was these times where he seemed so desperate and broken the most. Nothing in the world could have prepared me for this and I’m so thankful. If you get the chance to see Olivia, TAKE IT and enjoy every second. If you get the chance to see Colton, please do not sell your tickets because Ben isn’t there. It is still worth it and I didn’t feel like I missed any part of the performance by having Colton. (He’s also beautiful and one of the sweetest people in the whole world. I love him to pieces) ❤️

anonymous asked:

For the fic meme: "wait, that was you?"

“Wait, that was you?” Yuri asked. Otabek had just told him that they had met at Yakov’s summer camp and that’s when he remembered. He remembered Otabek very well now. That was you who was my first, and only lasting, crush?

“Yes, is there a problem?” Otabek immediately responded with a question of his own, and frankly, Yuri was still trying to wrap his head around the fact that this god that was standing next to him and had just rescued him, was in fact the very same person he had a crush on as a boy.

Yuri shook his head slowly, thinking about his next words carefully. “No, it’s just… I remember you too. I never managed to get your name back then, though. I never thought I’d see you again, yet here you are, swooping in to save my from my own psycho fans and then bringing me to probably the most beautiful spot in Barcelona. What’s your angle, Altin?” Yuri was, of course, hoping that his childhood crush was about to confess his own crush. This was, of course, purely wishful thinking and was not very likely.

“Only if you want there to be one, Yuri. I brought you here to ask if we could be friends. From the first day I saw you, I knew you were strong. There was something else in your eyes when you looked at me, and I’ve never known what it was.” He paused and stepped forward. “But if you’re asking for what angle I’d play if I knew for certain it would work out… I suppose I’ll tell you.”

Yuri waited a moment, realizing three things. One was that Otabek wasn’t going to say anything else without an answer from Yuri. The second was that this stoic bastard has said so damn much in the past ten minutes alone, and Yuri wasn’t sure anyone else really every heard him talk so much. He felt special. The third this he realized was that they were facing each other with only about four inches separating them. Yuri had a feeling he knew where this was going especially given the slightest hint of pink on Otabek’s cheeks, and he was, strangely enough, okay with it. When he spoke, it was a whisper. But there was no need to be any louder than that when they were as close as they were. “Tell me.”

He chuckled and smirked. “Well, I’d say something along the lines of ‘Yuri Plisetsky, will you go on a date with me?’. And then maybe… Oh I don’t know, ‘Will you be my boyfriend?’. But that’s just an angle, isn’t it?”

Yuri’s heart stopped. His crush. Was planning on asking him out? Oh, this was almost too much for his heart to handle. Yuri glanced down at Otabek’s lips real quickly and made an impulsive decision.

One second they were standing there in a comfortable silence, the weight of the ‘hypothetical’ questions lingering between them. The next second, Yuri had thrown his arms around Otabek’s neck and pulled his face down ever so slightly to push their lips together. Otabek was surprised for all of three seconds, as he hadn’t expected this response from Yuri. He was certainly not complaining though. He placed his hands on Yuri’s hips and pulled him closer, kissing back happily.

When the kiss broke, Otabek smiled. “Are we gonna be boyfriends or not?”

Yuri rolled his eyes. “Clearly that kiss didn’t help you figure that out.”

“Maybe you should try again?”

“I think I will.”

The two ice skaters stayed where they were until the sun set, enjoying each other’s company and each other’s kisses. This was the start of something beautiful.

FIN

anonymous asked:

28. MSR. I'm feeling fluff but not opposed to smut. Maybe a birthday/Christmas/one of them is sick?

This prompt is really, really old. The prompt was  “You did this for me?”. I picked birthday and one of them is sick. 

Tagging @fictober and @today-in-fic

It’s 9.16 am and Mulder is not yet at the office. Despite the fact that Mulder has a habit of ditching her, or following any lead right away without another though, he tends to be at work on time. If not early. How often has she strolled in and Mulder was already in the midst of something important? 

Today, Scully made sure she’d be there before him. To prepare her surprise for his birthday. She examines her work now from all angles. Small, colorful candles flicker their light at her and in between them sits a slice of carrot cake. With extra frosting and, instead of a candy carrot on top, a small alien head. In gray, of course. A few weeks ago on a stakeout, Mulder told her that he didn’t like celebrating his birthday. Too much fuss, he explained spewing out sunflower seeds like an alien-hunting James Dean character. The only thing he liked, still indulged in even now, he admitted to her, was a slice of carrot cake. That’s when Scully knew what she’d do for his birthday. 

And now he’s late. She picks up the phone and dials his cell phone number. Three dial tones later and Mulder himself steps into the office.

“Scully?“ 

"There you are,” she hangs up the phone and gets up to greet him; he stands there like a question mark, his eyes searching hers in the dim, intimate light, “happy birthday!” Scully exclaims and engulfs him in her arms. If she didn’t know better she’d think he’d forgotten his own birthday. He groans into her hair when she squeezes his sides but hugs her back.

“You did this for me?" His voice tangles in her hair and Scully smiles against his chest. 

"I did. I know you said you don’t like your birthday, but everyone deserves to feel a little special every once in a while.”

“Thank you, Scully. Thank you.” His arms tighten around her and Scully wishes they could stay like this for the rest of the day. She gently pushes at him. There are tears swimming in his eyes but he smiles at her. 

“Come on, blow out your candles.” He makes his way over to his desk, his steps deliberate and slow. Something is wrong, Scully thinks, but is distracted when Mulder stares at the plate in front of him. He chuckles, shakes his head in disbelief. Her Mulder, for once unable to belief in something. His head comes up so he can look at her. He doesn’t say a word, purses his lips and starts blowing out the candles. Scully only got him a dozen; who wants to be reminded of their age anyway? Mulder is halfway through when he sits down in his chair. 

“Mulder, are you all right?" Scully turns on the desk lamp, the bright light breaking the atmosphere. 

"I’m just old.” Mulder jokes. Now in the light, Scully sees Mulder’s pale complexion. Strands of hair are plastered to his forehead.

“Mulder, look at me.” Scully orders and he does. Dilated pupils, she notes. She leans over and touches his cheek. They feel warm, feverish. 

“I haven’t been feeling well. My stomach feels funny.” He touches his side and Scully swallows hard. She puts two and two together, takes his hand and helps him up.

“We’re going to the hospital right now. I think you have appendicitis." 

"Happy birthday to me.” He mumbles as he lets himself be led away.

They confirm Scully’s diagnosis in the ER. Mulder is admitted and prepped for surgery right away, the inflammation too far gone to wait any longer. The fact that he doesn’t complain once tells Scully that he’s in more pain than he’s letting on.

“Are you going to operate?” He asks her, his voice slightly slurred. 

“No, I’m not. These people here know what they’re doing.” That’s her hope anyway. Scully knows this is a routine operation. Mulder will be fine. They’ll release him in a few days, he’ll take it easy - she’ll make sure of that - and soon, he’ll have forgotten it ever happened.

“Then why are you crushing my hand?” As if it were on fire, Scully lets go of his hand. It falls away him like a wet rag.

“I’m sorry, Mulder. I’m just… you scared me, you know? You should have told me you weren’t feeling well.”

“I forgot when I saw you,” her eyebrows shoot up, “and what you did for my birthday. I only wish I could have tried the carrot cake. See what that alien tastes like.” They both chuckle. 

“I promise I’ll get you a new one once they’ll let you eat solid food again.” Mulder groans just as three nurses walk in. Time to go.

“I’ll be here when you wake up, Mulder.” Scully squeezes his hand and finds herself unwilling to let go. Mulder’s panic face makes an appearance and she puts her other hand on his cheek. “It’ll be fine. It’s a routine operation. And you know you have something to look forward to: your carrot cake.” He squeezes her hand as his eyelids droop. Another moment and he’ll be gone. Scully listens to the familiar click and clack of the hospital bed as they start wheeling Mulder out. She’s still holding his hand knowing she’ll have to let go any second now.

“Scully… I… love you.” Her hand lets go, they take him away, and she stands there. Did he just say what she thinks he just said?

Two hours later, Scully is informed that there were no complications. Mulder is in his room, still out of it, and she is allowed to be with him. A nurse brings her a blanket, apologizes that the plastic chairs are so uncomfortable. Scully keeps drifting off, her hand holding Mulder’s like a lifeline. When it twitches, finally, she sits up straight, waits for his eyes to open.

“Hey, Mulder." 

"Hi. Am I dead?”

“No, you’re not. How are you feeling?”

“Hmmm, tired.”

“It’s the anesthetic. It’ll take a while before it wears off. Any pain?”

“No. Feel… pretty good. Best birthday ever.” His eyes are closed, he’ll be asleep again in no time, but at least he’s smiling. As she stares at his peaceful face, she wants to ask him. Ask him if he really said I love you earlier. Scully knows it’s no use and yet she leans forward to whisper to him. 

“Do you remember anything from before, Mulder? Before the operation?" 

"Hmm. You… carrot cake… I love… love… love carrot cake.” Scully, amused, shakes her head. Of course. Carrot cake. He loves carrot cake. That’s all. Scully takes his hand back in hers and leans back in her chair. Maybe she’ll ask him again later. Maybe.

Delusional?

Okay. First try. Usually I’m not that kind of fan who writes a meta or something like that. I’m not that good with words, when it’s not my mother tongue. But this is something I have to write off of me now. It bothers me. I’m doing this mostly to reassure myself, that I’m NOT seeing things. Well, I hope so. Sorry in advance but…Please, listen…

So, I have this dear friend of mine (who’s a huge fan of BBC’s Merlin and loves The 100 as well), whose opinion I value very high, and she said a thing, that I can’t get out of my mind now. She said that everything Bellarke-related, the slight touches, all the stares, might be unintentional acting, especially by Clarke. And I considered it, I really did, to maybe be true. BUT… Then again… I’m a huge ArMor (Arthur/Morgana)-shipper (Merlin BBC), and you may think of this ship whatever you like but… In season 1 - and most of that fandom agree with this, as well as the actors themselves (Bradley James/Arthur Pendragon even said in an interview, that “they clearly fancied each other” in season 1) – they were written as a potential couple/love interest for each other. No-one can tell me otherwise. There are far too many hints/evidences for that, far too many “glances” and “touches” and even “words”, although they never really got together… Sounds familiar? (But due to the storyline and the introduction of ArWen (Arthur/Guinevere) as a pairing it was kind of clear that the writers would drop ArMor at some point – although it’s part of the Arthurian Legend itself. But that’s another story…)

What I’m trying to say is this: If you/we consider ArMor a thing in season 1 of Merlin and say/admit, that at this point they clearly fancied each other/had a crush on each other, how on earth can anyone POSSIBLY think, that Bellarke is unintentional at all?! I mean… Have a look at that if you please… (Disclaimer: GIF’s not mine! All rights to the owners.)

These are my ArMor-baes….

And these are my Bellarke-baes…

And have a look at that

and now at this

And here too

And look at that…

And (EVEN MORE INTENSE!)

And… (this isn’t even only S1)

Bellarke:

Originally posted by dailythehundred

The angst…

Bellarke baes:

Hugs (be still my heart):

Last but not least (and very dear to me):

Bellarke:

Even L said/realized it’s true. “You care about him?” –

And let’s not forget all the fuss about “weakness”

Let’s Murphy have the last word (or Kane, or Jaha… or who else realized only because of all their (of course only) unconditional acting around each other that they clearly have a thing for each other…):

No.

The writers did all these things ON PURPOSE. It can’t be otherwise. And the cinematography speaks for itself. All the zooming in on their touches or stares… And the things they SAID to each other up until this point of the show, all the “I need you’s” and “I trust you’s”, all the “I’d do everything! Please don’t kill him’s” and “We can’t lose Clarke’s/I can’t lose you’s” (not to mention Bellamy’s -  completely unintentional of course… – decision to run after Clarke, even though he’s gravely wounded… or the latest “If you’re on that list, I’m on that list – Write it down or I will”-confession…),

Originally posted by jchnmurqhy

as well as all the other things like the epic hugs or the neck-nuzzles – and yes, Clarke’s nuzzling too (I TOTALLY would do this with a platonic friend of mine…unintentionally… of COURSE… who am I kidding >.<). Can it possibly be more obvious? I don’t know. But these are the facts. They can’t be overseen or ignored. And I think… even if I’m preoccupied because I’m a reader of the novels by Kass Morgan, there’s definitely a visual (sexual) tension between our lovelies. And I think they were planned right from the start. As the slow burn of all slow burn-relationships - to keep up the tension. That’s why there are so many hints even in the first series. If there would be ANYTHING that reassures me that Bellarke is endgame at last, than I could endure EVERYTHING on the way, even one-night-stands and other crushes. *sigh*

So… tell me guys… am I seeing things, or what? I wished, that my friend would be able to see the show through my eyes every now and then. The fact, that she smiles a bit over metas like this, or hardcore-shippers (and I am one of these) for that matter, saddens me more than I could’ve ever imagined. I have too much time I guess… *sigh* But that’s nothing we couldn’t solve or talk about. And that makes me happy again. I trust us. ;)

But please, guys, I’m not delusional, or…

Can I Pick: Stiles Stilinski One Shot (Request)

This is the next of my requests which was requested by a lovely Anonymous friend. I hope you enjoy it nonnie :D

Author: @susybird

Relationship: Stiles Stilinski x Reader Platonic Friendship

Description: Fluff just cute and mushy best friend fluff. Stiles and You go to a party where he manages to embarrass you in front of your crush.

Word Count: 1348

Author’s Note: This didn’t turn out like I thought it would at all!!! Hope you enjoy the ending!!!

As always thank you to my Beta reader @redstringlovers for having my back and reading my stuff.

Let me know what you think, I love love feedback of any kind. Also let me know if you want to be added to my forever tag. Enjoy :)


Prompt: “Right now, I don’t know if I want to kiss you or shove you off a bridge.” “Can I pick?”

Originally posted by itsagirlthingbae

“Stiles!” I yelled towards my best friend as he pottered around upstairs.

“I’m coming, I’m coming,” he shouted back, as a loud clunk and then a thud floated down from the second storey, followed by Stiles’ resounding curse. I chuckled as my very unco-ordinated best friend took the stairs two at a time, missing the last one and banging into the wall.

“Ouch!” Stiles grimaced, rubbing his left arm where it had connected with the solid barrier.

“Serves you right for being so late,” I point out maliciously, holding out my wrist to show him the time on my watch.

Stiles draped one arm around my shoulders. “But you love me anyway,” he smirked, placing a kiss on my temple.

“Mhmmn,” I reply uncommittedly, slipping out from under his arm and chucking his shoes at his head. “Come on, we need to go Stiles!”

Keep reading

If You Come Back ‘ Hong Jisoo

Admin note: I might decide to delete this later but it’s two am and I needed to post something fluffy to get it out of my system so ye

Summary: in which you and Josh have been best friends forever and he needs to leave LA for SK to follow his dreams to become a singer

Part 1Part 2 | Part 3

  • “Well?”
  • “Well what…?”
  • “I’m going to have to make a decision and I want your input. As the person who knows me best, what do you think?”
  • “Josh please.”
  • you both laugh
  • but the laughter isn’t your usual
  • it doesn’t feel like the normal Saturday-morning-cartoons-and-cereal laugh
  • it doesn’t feel like the Josh-oh-my-god-that-was-an-awful-joke-never-make-it-again laugh
  • it felt like a let’s-laugh-to-make-this-seem-less-serious-than-it-really-is laugh
  • this could be your last chance
  • for years you had known Joshua Hong
  • the boy who lived not too far from your house
  • just down the sidewalk some 127 steps and then left
  • the big warm house with a rich brown paint and white trim
  • the door always adorned with a beautiful seasonal wreath
  • and a little welcome mat that said, “God made dirt, so dirt won’t hurt, welcome to our house”
  • honestly the safest place in the world for you
  • because Joshua was there
  • because wherever Joshua was, he somehow made you feel as if the world couldn’t possibly be a bad place
  • it took you a lot of years
  • years spent from elementary school to middle school
  • years running around dragging Josh on adventures or trying to get his attention from across the hall in church
  • years to figure it out
  • that for you it was never about the brown house with white trim
  • it had been Joshua all along
  • Joshua felt like home
  • and you were head over heels for the guy
  • you had spent a lot of time falling for him
  • and when it finally hit you
  • you felt relieved
  • because it just made sense
  • you looked at Joshua now
  • his eyes tracing the stars as the two of you sat on the balcony that was directly outside your room
  • the sound of your mom’s voice floating up from the living room where she was entertaining Joshua’s mom
  • surprisingly not worried at all about her daughter upstairs alone with a high school boy
  • because it was Joshua
  • “Well Josh I-“
  • he cut you off, knowing very well your response
  • “Don’t tell me the decision is mine alone to make.”
  • “But it is. Your mom agreed to support you on whatever you decide and-“
  • “But I want to know what you think.”
  • “I’m not going to make your decision for you.”
  • “I know and I didn’t expect you to. I just want you to tell me what you think of everything. Because whenever the world gets too confusing for me, you put everything in perspective.”
  • your heart skips a beat at his words
  • there was no hiding anything from each other
  • not when you’ve known each other for years
  • by the time you figured out you were head over heels for your best friend
  • Joshua seemed to figure it out at the same time too
  • and he found that he was just as crazy about you as you were him
  • at the time he had wanted to wait
  • and you had agreed
  • if both of your parents found out, they might not let you guys hang out as much as they did
  • though you had a suspicion your mom knew and was just unconcerned about Joshua
  • bc she trusted him prob more than she trusted you lol
  • “Joshua Hong, look.”
  • you pointed to a star directly under the moon
  • “It’s the first star I wished on ever since I knew how.”
  • he looked up at the star curiously
  • “You know Josh, I never expected that star to grant my wish. I never expected some fairy godmother to come floating to the earth to bestow upon me fancy dresses and a dance before midnight with the prince of my dreams.”
  • you pause to monitor his reaction
  • you’re caught off guard by how warm the whole situation felt
  • Josh siting right next to you
  • shoulders touching
  • Josh’s eyes carefully trying to imagine the story you’re trying to tell
  • except of course the prince of your dreams is no mystery man
  • no he’s no mystery
  • you take a deep breath and continue
  • “No I never expected magic. We live in the real world, magic doesn’t happen that way.”
  • you feel Joshua shift next to you, turning to face you
  • “If you tell me to stay,” he begins, “I will genuinely consider your opinion. I-I-I like you y/n you know this, but if I go, it’ll be for a long time.”
  • he trails off looking back up at the star
  • “Joshua,” you turn to completely face him
  • “Joshua I never expected that star to grant my wish, and yet here I am with everything I could possibly want, I could be going to a great college, my crush happens to like me back, I’m getting chocolate ice cream with him after school tomorrow and he’s sitting in front of me.”
  • he smiles as you blush but continue
  • “Everything I could have wished for is here but Joshua…” you look him in the eyes now
  • “All your dreams could still be out there. I don’t think you can see yourself clearly. You with your dorky everything playing that guitar on sundays, singing your heart out for the school on performance days, you have a shot of all of that now and even you don’t need me to convince you.”
  • you take his hand now and hear the sharp intake of breath he has as his fingers gently curl around yours
  • “You know yourself that you want to do this, and even if I had been vehemently against it, I have no doubt you would have gone and tried and done whatever it takes to succeed, because that’s the kind of person you are.”
  • “But if I go then what?” he finally breaks through your speech, “Do we just stay friends, are we not anything?”
  • you laugh
  • “God, Hong Jisoo, when were you such a romantic?”
  • “I blame all those chick flicks you made me watch with you.”
  • “Hey titanic is a classic fight me!”
  • and the both of you laugh together again this time something seemed to click again
  • suddenly you were both laughing together because you could and because you wanted to
  • and possibly because you wouldn’t have much more time to do it together
  • “So what about whatever this is?”
  • “Listen,” You start again, “go ok? Have fun, meet a bunch of people, travel the world, make five hundred best friends, see pretty girls, or guys if you want, experiment like you’re in college, write lots of emotional teenage angst songs on your guitar and just live.”
  • “And then?”
  • “And then if you decide, after seeing prettier girls, or that the world is a lot smaller than you thought, or that perhaps you’re missing home, come back. Come back if your feelings are the same.”
  • “What if they aren’t?”
  • “Then it doesn’t matter to me, because then you can find what truly makes you happy.”
  • “So all I have to do is come back?”
  • “I’ll always be here, if you come back.”

Originally posted by lonexsamurai

Part 2

MASTERLIST

Celebrity Crushes and Casual Dating

Thinking back, I never really understood why my friends and classmates had crushes on celebrities. Hell, back then one of my classmates even broke up with her boyfriend because she liked Justin Bieber so much. It was really confusing to me.

The same thing with some people having a new partner every couple weeks. Like what? You just were dating Lutz and then John and now Marco? How can you even have so many crushes so fast one after another?

I guess these were early signs for me that I am demisexual and demiromantic. It’s always interesting for me to look back and see the signs of me being a demigod appearing in my past :P

Not Kidding?~ Montgomery De la Cruz

“Hey beautiful,” the school asshole and jock of Liberty high Montgomery said leaning up against the locker next to mine one morning which was out of character because you we never talk.
“What do you want Montgomery?” I ask suspiciously not bothering to look at him because I was to busy shoving books in my locker.
“Please a beautiful girl like yourself can call me Monty,” he said causing me to stop and look up at him, he had an oddly genuine smile on his face. “I was wondering if you would do me the honor of accompanying me to see a movie at the Crestmont,” he continued in a uncharacteristically proper way causing me to assume this is all just some stupid joke.
“Look if this is just some stupid joke just end it already because in not going to be used to amuse you and your airhead friends who can’t except people are all different. Me being bigger than all the skinny girls doesn’t make me any less than them so just go back to your friends and tell them it didn’t work,” I say ranting because the thought of him using me as a joke made my blood boil. It took me a while to become body positive and except how I was and I don’t plan on letting anyone ruin that. He just stared at me with a hurt expression on his face.
“Y/N it’s not like that I swear, I honestly really like you and I want to go on a date with you. Nobody put me up to this I just think you are absolutely beautiful and funny and smart and I wish I could call you mine and take you out,” He softly explained when he finally processed what I said before, but what he said completely took me by surprise. I couldn’t wrap my head around what he said because it was unreal. I’ll admit I didn’t have a crush on him but he was cute and I know deep down he probably isn’t a bad guy. Looking up at him I can see worry in his eyes though he is trying to hide it.
“Well then I would be honored to go on a date with you Monty,” I say smiling, “listen handsome I have to go but pick me up at seven,” I say closing my locker. Before I walk off to my class I lean up and kiss him on the cheek leaving him standing there stunned.

Face Revelation - H2O Delirious

Quick few notes:
1) All the one shots I’ve written so far are in the same alternate universe of gay superpowered teenagers.
2)Gamer tags and real names are used interchangeably. Last names are not mentioned nor is the location of the school other than it’s in America
3) All these one-shots can be found on either Wattpad or AO3 in one story. The title is Hiding for Myself and the username is nevergiveupgirl (Add 924 on the end for Wattpad).
4) I’m willing to take requests if you want me to write more, but I don’t do smut. I’m a teenager, and have no experience in that area.
5) Enjoy!

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~~•~•~•~•

Jonathan was staring at Evan again. It happened more often than he would like to admit, but he just couldn’t seem to take his eyes off him whenever he was in the hallway. Maybe it was his slick black hair or his brown eyes, but Jonathan always found himself looking Evan’s way as he walked by. It wasn’t like Evan was going to see him, though. They hung out with different people and liked different things and were of different rankings in the metaphorical high school caste system. Even if you could forget all though things, Jonathan’s power of invisibility combined with his introvertedness made it easy for him to hide his gaze.

He watched Evan walk through the hallway talking with one of his friends before the two turned the corner and disappear from his line of sight. He strained his neck to see if he could find them, and it was then he felt the jolt of electricity on his right side.

“Bryce, what the hell?!” Jonathan exclaimed as he became visible again. He looked to his right, and saw Bryce laughing. “Really?!”

“Hey, don’t blame me! It was CaRtOoNz’s idea!” said Bryce, pointing over Delirious’ shoulder. He turned around, and was meet with Luke’s smug face.

“It not like you’re going to fucking listen to me anymore.” was his only comment. “Especially about your Evan problem.”

“It’s not a problem, CaRtOoNz!” Jonathan shot back.

“Oh, right. Your ‘crush’ on Evan hasn’t become a problem.”

“No, it’s not. And it’s not a fucking crush.” Luke rolled his eyes at this statement.

“Can’t you at least talk to him?” Bryce suggested as the trio started walking toward class.

“Can’t.” Delirious replied.

“Won’t.” CaRtOoNz rebutted. “He doesn’t have the balls.”

“Hey! I .. I have balls.”

“Not when it comes to Evan.” This earned another snicker from Bryce. Jonathan didn’t say anything, mainly as he was too busy being invisible. Evan, alone this time, walked past them, and Jonathan felt his cheeks grow rosy. Bryce and Luke simply looked at each other as Evan left.

“You sure you have balls, Delirious?” A voice asked from the shadows.

“Fuck you, Ohm.” Jonathan said, before turning back to CaRtOoNz. “Alright. Let’s say I did have a crush on Evan …”

“Which you do.” Bryce interrupted.

“IF I did, then you know I still couldn’t talk to him. Only people I’m comfortable around are you guys, Mini, and Vanoss.” Delirious glanced at his friends, trying to gauge their reactions. Luke still had his usual straight face, while Ohm was too much disguised by shadows to read him. Bryce, however, was easy to read. He was looking at Ohm with his checks slightly puffed and hands in his pockets. He also was avoiding eye contact with Delirious. “Bryce.”

“What, Delirious?”

“Do you know something I don’t?” Bryce again looked at Ohm, as if he needed permission to say it. Ohm was the one who actually said.

“Delirious, Evan is Vanoss.”

“Oh.” The other boys left out a few laughs, which only let the redness in Jonathan’s cheeks become more apparent. Suddenly the hallway became more claustrophobic, despite not ever having the fear. He needed space to process the thoughts swimming in his head. He excused himself and walked quickly away, focusing on one thought of many swimming in his head.

What did this mean?

~•~•~

He was so lost in his thoughts that Jon almost didn’t hear the tapping at the window. He assumed it was just his fingers tapping against the metal chair he was situated in in Mini’s office, but after 30 seconds it became annoying. He stopped, but the noise didn’t. The noise, he soon realized, was coming from a little red bird at the window. Jon could clearly see it was injured on his left leg.

“Hey little guy.” He said as he opened the window. The bird quickly took its chance and flew past him and into the bathroom door. He hesitated, simply staring at the ajar window before turning and heading to the bathroom to usher the bird out.

“Agh.” The sound came from the bathroom, one which made Delirious freeze. It was human, but he was the only person in Mini’s office. The only reason the bird was able to fly into the window was because he left the door when he went. And there was only one person who he know had the power to change into animals. He didn’t want to go in, so he stuck to leaning against the side next to the door.

“You know,” He started. “I don’t think turning into a bird helped your leg.”

“It was faster than walking.” Evan shot back. “Where’s Craig?” It took Jonathan a second to remember Craig was Mini’s real name. He only really called him Mini.

“I think he said he went to go diffuse Tyler and Marcel.” Jon heard Evan curse under his breath. “I’m not sure. I only caught him on his way out.”

“No, that’s probably where he is. Knowing him.” Evan groaned again at his leg. “Why are you waiting for Craig?”

“Burns. Not the worst though, it’s only about 2nd degree this time.” He lifted his shirt, despite the fact Evan couldn’t see him.

“How’d you get them?”

“Battleship.” Delirious replied. “It was all fun in games until the fire nation attacked.” He chuckled a little, and he heard Evan do the same. “It was my friend Luke though. He has pyrokinesis, or can fire bend, so whenever we play a game that’s even slightly rage inducing he often lashes out on the nearest person.”

“Yeah, that sounds like my friend Marcel.” Evan comments.

“Is that how you got the broken leg?”

“Yeah. My friend Tyler has somewhat of an innate talent for pissing people off. David has it too, but it only works on Marcel.” Evan sighs. “He has the shortest temper out of all of us, so it’s best to stay fifty feet away from him when he turns into a big rage monster.”

“I’ll make sure not to piss him off, then.” Jon says, and both boys laughed. The two stayed where they were for a while. Jon talked to Evan in the bathroom, never moving from his position outside the single door. It felt like he was Delirious again, simply at home talking to Vanoss behind his computer screen. It seemed like half an hour before Evan brought the conversation back to their current situation.

“I wish Craig would get back here soon.” He said. “My leg hurts like a bitch.”

“Don’t you have his number? Seeing as you two are friends?”

“It’s not on me. I must have dropped it when Marcel turned Hulk.” He was silently for a moment. Jon assumed it was hesitation. “Can I borrow yours?”

Jon hesitated too. This was the guy that, damnit, he had a crush on. He could fuck the entire thing up. Granted, he didn’t fuck it up before now, but he was certain he would fuck it up now. He took a deep breath. It was just Vanoss. One of his best friends. Just Vanoss.

“Sure man.” He used his closer hand to push the door open enough to squeeze through. Evan was on the floor, using his elbows to prop his chest up. His legs were spread out in front of him and, like the bird, it wasn’t hard to tell which leg was broken. His left leg was bent at an unusual angle, which Jon tried his best to avoid looking at. “That’s so unnatural, man.” He commented.

“Can I just have the phone?”

“Oh right, sorry.” He chuckled a little as he passed the phone to Evan. “His number is under M.”

“For Medic?”

“For Mini Ladd.”

“Like … his gamer tag?” Jonathan nodded. “I didn’t know you played.”

“Don’t tell many people I do. I’m somewhat of an introvert.”

“I’m Evan, by the way. I don’t think we had a proper introduction. My gamer tag is Vanoss.” Evan extended his hand as far as he could in his position, which wasn’t very. Jon still had to kneel down to accept it. “And you are?”

“Just call me Delirious.”

Doctor, Doctor

A little miraculous ladybug doctor au for you! 

He was the best neurologist surgeon in Paris, people would come hundreds of miles to be treated by him. He was simply the best and he loved it. He loved meting his patients, getting to know them and then saving their lives. In all of his career, he never let the death of his patients get to him. He took comfort in the fact that he did everything in his power to save them, then move on to the next patient.

Keep reading

Welcome to London {Joe Sugg X Reader Imagine}

Warnings: smut. 

A/N: Hope you enjoy, my lovelies. xoxo - Grace

Y/N’s POV

My parents weren’t too keen on me moving half way across the world to go to school in London, but here I was, bewildered at the new city and the opportunity to completely change my life. Growing up in a small town in Kansas has its upsides, but it wasn’t the place I wanted to make my life. London had been my dream city for as long as I could remember, and I was finally here.

I couldn’t contain my giddiness as I unlock my apartment door. Most of my larger belongings, such as my couch and bed, had already been shipped out and were waiting to be put in their proper places, but the rest of my belongings wouldn’t make it for a few more days. Luckily, I had a small suitcase packed that I could live out of for awhile. I walk across the apartment to look out the balcony door. The view was absolutely breathtaking; all the beautiful city lights could be seen as it was around 9 PM. I was completely awake, considering it would be around mid-afternoon back home. After texting my mother, I heard my stomach growl, reminding me that I hadn’t eaten a full meal in about 12 hours. Deciding to stick with something familiar, I search for the nearest McDonald’s.


After filling my belly, I decide to make a must-needed stop at a Tesco to pick up some groceries. I grab a trolley and begin filling it with the necessities: bread, eggs, etc. By the time I get back to the apartment, it’s nearly 11 PM. I take this time to explore the apartment since I hadn’t gotten the chance to yet. I make my way down the hallway and peek into each room. What would be my new office was empty except for the desk that had been shipped out earlier. Across the hall is my bedroom. I’m delighted to find my queen size bed already set up, with the bag of sheets and blankets sitting next to it. Diving onto the bed, I couldn’t contain my giggles and excitement. After making my bed, I pull out my laptop to watch a few movies and hopefully lull myself to sleep so I could adjust to the time change. After watching three movies, I fall asleep to the ending soundtrack of The Breakfast Club and my excited thoughts of what was to come.


When I wake up, the sun is already shining through my window. I look at my phone to see that it’s 11 AM and I have a missed call from my mother. I text her back, letting her know I’m safe and loving London so far. At about noon, I force myself out of bed, determined to get rid of this jet lag. After fixing myself a peanut butter sandwich, I step out on the balcony to enjoy the crisp autumn air. Less than an hour later, I was pulled out of my daydreams by the sound of a nearby voice. Looking to my left, I see a boy standing on the neighboring balcony. He hadn’t seen me yet, but he continued to talk, even though he was the only one out there.

“Look at this view, isn’t it beautiful?” I heard him ask. I assume maybe he had noticed I was sitting on the other balcony and was asking me, so I answered, “Yes, it’s absolutely breathtaking.”

He seemed utterly shocked to have received an answer. I giggled as he searches around him for the unknown voice. When he spots me, I wave towards him sheepishly.

“Hi there,” I say awkwardly.

“Oh hello, you nearly gave me a heart attack… I wasn’t expecting anyone to be out here,” he replies, his face turning a little red.

“Then who were you talking to?” I ask suspiciously.

“Oh, I was starting my vlog; I’m a YouTuber,” he answers, holding up his little black camera.

“Oh, that’s cool,” you reply, not really knowing what else to say.

“Yeah… I’m Joe by the way, Joe Sugg.”

“It’s nice to meet you, Joe. I’m Y/F/N.”

Joe and I continue to talk a bit more. Apparently the apartment he was in actually belongs to his friend, Caspar. I tell him that I’m just moving into my apartment, and he offers to help me move my things once they arrive. I thank him, grateful that he had offered because I was starting to wonder how I would do it on my own. While we were in the middle of our conversation, another boy steps out onto his balcony.

“Ah, Caspar, this is your new neighbor, Y/N,” Joe says to him.

“Hi,” I wave once again.  

“Hello, Y/N. It’s nice to meet you. I hope you’re okay with constant loud parties next door,” he says with a dorky smile.

“Really?” I ask, my smile dropping.

“No I’m just kidding, but if we ever do have a party here, you’re welcome to join,” he replies with a wink.

I laugh at his straightforwardness and reply, “We’ll see…”

“I like her; she doesn’t completely reject my flirting,” Caspar says.

“Don’t get your hopes up, mate; she said maybe, not yes.” Joe chuckles.

“Well boys, it’s been a pleasure meeting you, but I think I’m going to go explore the city, so I’ll see you around,” I say.

“Wait! Before you go, let me give you my number in case you need anything,” Joe says.

I type his contact into my phone and say goodbye once again. Who would’ve thought I’d make my first London friends without even leaving my apartment?


Joe’s POV

“Caspar, you lucky bloke! I wish I could have a neighbor that gorgeous,” I say once we return inside.

Caspar merely chuckles and starts chanting “someone’s got a crush.”

“I do not! Shut up, she might hear you,” I whisper yell at him as I hit his arm.

He just continues to chuckle at me in my flustered state. To be honest, I maybe did have a little crush on Y/N, but I mean, she’s absolutely beautiful. Hopefully I’ll be able to get to know her a bit better…


Later that evening, I was still around Caspar’s flat with a few of the other boys when I got an unfamiliar call. Assuming it was a prank call, I answered it in one of my goofy voices.

“What do you want?” I say in my Peter Griffin voice.

“Oh, I think I have the wrong number… I was looking for a Joe Sugg” a girl replies, sounding a bit flustered.

“Oh, is this Y/N? Sorry, I thought it was a prank call so I answered in my Peter Griffin voice,” I answered sincerely.

“Ah, it was a great impression.”

“Thank you. So, what did you need?”

“Oh right, so, I was out walking around the city, and, well you see, I think I might of gotten a little lost?”

“Oh my god, are you okay?”

“Yes, I’m fine, I just don’t know where I am or how to get back to my flat.”

“Hey, don’t worry, I’ll try and find you. Look around, is there anything that might give you a clue as to where you’re at?”

“Um… there’s a place called ‘Nando’s’ across the street—“

“–oh, I know where that’s at. I’m on my way now.”

“Thank you so much, Joe.”

“It’s not a problem, Y/N. I’ll see you soon.”


Y/N’s POV

About ten minutes after I called Joe, I feel a tap on my shoulder. I turn around, engulfing Joe in a hug, so happy to see him.

“Oh my gosh! Thank you, thank you, thank you! I was beginning to think I would be lost forever,” I say as I cling to Joe.

“Like I said, it’s not a problem, Y/N,” he says as he pulls out of the hug, although I wish he hadn’t.

“How about this; since you came to my rescue, let me buy you dinner tonight?” I ask.

“But what kind of a gentleman would I be if I let the lady pay for dinner?”

“Well then, how else am I supposed to repay you for helping me?”

“I’m sure you’ll find some way.”

“Fine… you win this one, but I will find a way to make it up to you.”

“Don’t worry about it, love. Shall we go in and eat?”

“We shall.”


After stuffing our bellies with Nando’s, Joe and I venture back out into the chilly evening air. Joe must have noticed me shiver because he offers me his jacket, which I gladly accept. As we walk down the sidewalks of London, we get to know each other better, and before I know it, we’ve arrived at my apartment building.

“Would you like to come over to Caspar’s flat for a bit to meet the rest of the boys?” he asks as we take the lift to my floor.

“I’d love to, considering I have nothing to do at my own place,” I reply.

“Great, but I have to warn you, the boys can be a bit overwhelming…” he trails off as he opens Caspar’s door.

The second we walked in, Caspar greets us. “Joe! New neighbor girl!”

“Hi Caspar,” I giggle.

“Guys, this is Y/N, Caspar’s new neighbor. Y/N, this is Oli, Jack, Conor, Mikey, and Josh,” Joe introduces me to everyone.

We all exchanged greetings as Joe leads me over to the couch to sit down next to him.

“So how did you meet these two wankers?” I think it was Jack who asked.

“Well, I was just sitting out on my balcony earlier today, enjoying the view, when Joe came out on his balcony and started talking to himself,” I giggle. The boys erupt in laughter at that as Joe’s face reddens.

“That’s not quite how I remember it happening, but whatever,” Joe replies.

It was now around 9:30 PM and Caspar brings out a few drinks.

“You’re legal, right, Y/N?” Josh asks.

“Yes I’m legal, I’m 24,” I reply, “25 in December.”

“What do you say we hit the clubs soon?” Conor asks.

“You up for it, Y/N?” Joe asks.

“Hell yes, but I need to go change first,” I answer.

“Well then go get ready, so we can partayyy!” Caspar yells.

I giggle and head over to my apartment hoping I have an outfit for the club in my suitcase. Luckily, I packed my little black dress in case of emergencies.

About thirty minutes later, I hear a knock on my door as I’m doing my finishing touches.

“Hurry up, Y/N!” I hear the boys shout.

“I’m almost done, just be patient,” I shout back.

When I open the door, I look up to see all the boys staring at me with their mouths open.

“Take a picture, it’ll last longer,” I say with a smirk.

Right after I say this I hear a camera click. I look over to Conor who has an innocent look on his face.

“You said to take a picture…” he replied.

We all busted up laughing and headed to the club. I stood in between Joe and Caspar, enjoying their company as we walked. We arrive at the club a few moments later, and Joe offered to go get me a drink.

“Stop buying my stuff, it’s not fair, I want to be nice, too,” I say to him with a pouty face.

“Sorry, love, I’m just a nice person I guess.”

“Well, nice guy, come dance with me,” I say, pulling him to the dance floor. He laughs as I pulled him through the chaotic crowd.


We dance the night away and by the time we got back to Caspar’s, it’s around 1 AM and we were all quite drunk. We mutually decided that everyone would stay there so we wouldn’t have to go through the hassle of calling an uber at this ungodly hour. We figure out the sleeping arrangements among Caspar’s flat and my flat. Caspar would share his bed with Josh; Jack and Conor would share Caspar’s guest bed; Oli would take Caspar’s couch; Mikey would take my couch; and Joe could crash with me. Joe protested at first, saying he would sleep on the floor, but I assured him it was fine. I honestly would rather have a cuddle buddy than sleep alone.  

By the time we got everyone situated, it was nearly 2 AM. I stumbled into my room with Joe in tow. Reaching into my suitcase, I pulled out an old t-shirt to sleep in.

“Close your eyes, I’m just going to change in here really quick,” I tell Joe. When I don’t hear a response, I turn around to see Joe already in the bed with his eyes closed. I quickly stripped out of my dress to put the t-shirt on, when I heard Joe’s voice.

“Mm, I like what I see,” I hear him say.

I turn around after I pulled the shirt over my head to see him staring at me.

“Hey! I told you to close your eyes,” I whisper yell at him.

He just chuckles at me and says “sorry, I just couldn’t resist.”

“It’s not very nice,”

“Hey, come here. I’m sorry, I won’t do it ever again.”

I chuckle at our drunken states as he pulls me down onto the bed in his arms.

“You’re funny, you know that?” I giggle.

“You’re cute, you know that?” he replies.

“You’re adorable.”

“You’re gorgeous.”

“Okay, but seriously, thank you, Joe. I had so much fun tonight,” I say as I kiss his cheek.

“The pleasure is mine, love,” he says as he leans in. Our lips meet and I can’t help but smile.

“Goodnight, Joe.”

“Goodnight, Y/N.”


I wake up the next morning in a blissful state, cuddled up to Joe’s side. Hangovers don’t typically affect me like they do others, so I don’t really dread waking up the day after a fun night. I struggle as I climb out of Joe’s arms to get to my bathroom. Once I’m done in there, I walk out  to the living room to see Mikey passed out. I tiptoe out the door and into Caspar’s apartment to see Oli sitting on the couch on his phone.

“Hey, Oli,” I smile.

“Hey Y/N, how are you doing?”

“Good, just figured the boys would want some breakfast when they wake up so I thought I’d come over here and start cooking.”

“Oh Y/N, you’re so kind, you don’t have to go to the trouble.”

“It’s fine, honestly, I love cooking.”

“At least let me help you.”

By the time we’re done cooking, we have enough cheesy eggs, bacon, and pancakes to feed an army. Caspar, Josh, Conor, and Mikey eventually followed the smell of food into the kitchen, but Jack and Joe were still passed out.

“Can’t we just eat without them?” Conor asks.

“Nope, but we can have some fun waking them up,” I reply, “you guys go wake Jack, I’ve got Joe, okay?”

We split up and I walk back into my apartment to wake Joe. I walk in my room and see Joe sprawled out on my bed, still passed out. I quickly take a picture of him, because he looks adorable cuddled up in the blankets. After saying his name a few times, I realize I’m going to have to step it up a notch if I want to wake him up. I step up on the bed and start jumping up and down around him, shouting his name. It definitely wakes him up but he catches me off guard by hooking my foot and pulling me down into his arms.

“It’s too early,” he whines.

“Aw, is the poor baby sleepy?” I ask.

“Yes, now let me sleep.”

“Fine then, I’ll just let the boys eat your food.”

“What food?” he asks, seeming interested.

“I made breakfast.”

“Fine, I’ll get up, but only because there’s food.”

I smile and pull his arm until we reach Caspar’s flat.

We eat breakfast and hang out at Caspar’s for a few more hours until I get a text from my moving company that the truck with my things will arrive that evening.

“Oh my gosh, yay! My stuff is going to be here tonight!” I yell.

“That’s great! I’ll be here to help,” Joe says.

“I’ll help, too,” Caspar adds.                


By the time the moving truck gets here, it’s 5 PM. We unload everything and pile it into the lift. By 7 PM, we have everything upstairs, and now I just had to organize and put things away which I kindly tell the boys I can handle. Caspar leaves, but Joe insists on staying, telling me he can order us a pizza and find things to help me with. At 9 PM, we’re nearly finished when Joe asks to stay the night again.

“It’s getting late and I’m already here; do you mind if I stay crash here again?”

“It’s perfectly fine, Joe. I think I’m done with unpacking for the night though. Do you want to watch a movie?”

“Sounds great, love.”

We get comfortable in my bed with the computer settled in between us. We can’t decide on a movie to watch, so instead we just binge watch a couple of episodes of F.R.I.E.N.D.S. The whole time, Joe and I would subconsciously scoot closer together. It got to the point where I was sat in-between his legs with his arms wrapped tightly around me. After the third episode ends, I look back at Joe.

“Do you want to do something else? I’m kinda bored of watching TV, but I’m not very tired.”

“Yeah, me too. What do you have in mind?”

“We could play a game,” you suggest.

“Sure, how about truth or dare?”

“Ooh, I love that game”

“Okay, truth or dare?” he asks.

“I didn’t say you could go first… but truth.”

“Hm, what was your first thought when you met me?”

“Well at first, I thought you were some psycho dude who talks to himself, but after I got to know you, I realized how sweet and adorable you are.”

“Aw, you think I’m adorable,” he replies with a little smirk.

“Yeah, yeah, truth or dare, Sugg?”

“Dare.”

“I dare you to go out on the balcony and scream ‘Jaspar is real.’”

“Oh blimey, I shouldn’t have ever told you about that ship,” he whines.

“Hey, a dare is a dare.”

“Fine,” he grumbles as we get up and he follows me out to the balcony.

“Hurry up, it’s cold out here.”

He glares at me, and then as fast as he can, he screams the phrase so it comes out as gibberish.

“Hey that’s not fair!”

“Oh and why is that? I did the dare,” he replies smugly.

I glare at him and chase him inside when he tries to run. When I follow him around the corner, her surprises me by turning around and picking me up to spin me around.

“Put me down!” I yell.

“Make me,” he replies with a smirk as he carries me back to my  room.

“Truth or dare, love?”

I narrow my eyes at him. “Dare.”

He throws me on the bed and starts to crawl up towards my face.

“I dare you to kiss me,” he says simply.

I grab his face and fill the empty space between us. He pulls my head closer to deepen the kiss. Before it gets too heated, he pulls away, and says, “Your turn.”

“Truth or dare?” I say, nearly out of breath.

“Dare,” he growls lowly.

I look into his eyes, barely above a whisper, “Fuck me.”

Not even a second passes before his lips are attacking mine again. He pulls away momentarily to remove his shirt. I marvel at the newly exposed skin as he slips his hands under my shirt to remove mine as well. His hands reach for my breasts as he reattaches our lips. I let out a small moan as he begins to kiss down my jaw, down to the valley between my breasts,  lower and lower until he was kneeling between my legs.  He slowly runs his hands up and down my legs and peels back my leggings and underwear.

“My god, you’re perfect,” he says as he kisses around my hips and thighs.

“Please, Joe… do something,” I plead.

“What do you want me to do, love?” he asks as he leans down and blows across my sensitive skin.

I shiver at the sudden rush of cool air on my soaked core. “Anything, please, Joe; I need you.”

With that, he immediately attaches his lips to my clit and begins to suck. I gasp at the sensation and reach down for his hair to pull him closer. He moans on me and I feel the vibrations throughout my body. I’m so close to my high but before I can reach it, Joe pulls away.

“Hey!” I shout as he crawls off the bed to remove the rest of his clothing.

“Shh, baby… as much as I’d love for you to cum on my mouth, right now I just want you to cum with me inside you.”

He crawls back up my body, showering me in sloppy kisses along the way. I let out a moan when he reaches a certain spot on my neck. He notices and sucks a deep purple mark there.  I whimper at the loss of contact when he stands up on his knees to put on the condom. When I see his member, I gulp. He wasn’t necessarily thick, but he was long.

“You ready, love?” he asks as he situates my hips on the bed.

“God, yes!”

He slowly slides into me to let me adjust to his length. Once I’m comfortable, he just barely pulls out of me and slams back in with full force. I let out a shriek as I clench around him.

“Fuck, Y/N, you feel so good… so tight.”

He pounds into me repeatedly and the pain soon turns to pleasure.

“Oh fuck, Joe,” I moan.  

He surprises me when he flips us over, so I’m now straddling him.

“Ride me, baby,” he says with a smirk.

I mimic his smirk as I roll my hips on him at a slow, torturing pace.

“God, you’re going to be the death of me, Y/N,” he says as he plants his feet flat on the mattress.

My gasp turns into a loud moan as he thrusts up into me, gripping my ass to hold me in place. His thrusts continue and he hits that certain spot inside of me and I let out a shriek.

“Fuck, Joe, I’m gonna come!” I yelp. He pushes me over the edge when he reaches down with his thumb to rub tight circles on my clit. We both moan out as we climax together. I collapse onto his chest trying to catch my breath.

“God, Y/N, that was amazing,” he says as he pulls me off his hips to lie beside him.

“Mhm,” I mumble tiredly as I cuddle into his side, still shaking a bit from the aftershocks of my climax.

“Are you okay?” he asks concerned.

“Yes, god yes! That was one of the best orgasms I’ve ever had,” I answer.  

 After we calmed down a bit, we cleaned ourselves up and lied down under the covers. Joe pulled me close and began tracing circles on my back.

“Y/N, I really like you and I kinda wanna see where this could go… what do you think?” he asks nervously.

“I like you too, Joe, and I’d love to see where this goes,” I reply. He smiles down at me and pecks my lips one last time.  

“Goodnight, love,” he says, barely above a whisper.

“Goodnight, Joe.”

anonymous asked:

Friends OCs, do they do anything for ya?

If I had to drum up a quick little list here:

Sihagen’s Samantha is great. Cute in design. One of the few characters that is explicitly sexually active. And at the same time, not indulgently lewd. (Cute as fuck you know it ya’ll)

TD-Art’s Wendy is a fucking delight. Varied color scheme. Generally cute. She’s also very often big. So that’s a plus. (Big Soft. Would Let Crush Me)

Pepe’s Penelope. I have never see a greater pairing of style and design. Pepe’s linework makes her look unbelievably soft and adorable. Her figure is tastefully hyper without going into absurdity. (10/10, Crush my City Please)

Ethan64′s Lucy is a total delight. Part of it is I’m a sucker for girls that get big and let loose. Her design is so frustratingly painfully simply perfect when it comes to Ethan’s own style. Love her to pieces. Almost literally. (One of those “Shit I wish I could think of that” Moments)

SunnyDLite’s Sammy and Gloria are a treat. They tackle adorable size-difference couples stuff with grace. Like, palpable intimacy without sex and prevalent size difference without getting in the way of the couples stuff. They both lean into their style and press all my buttons. (An Ideal Couple. I Wish I Could Nail This Concept As Well As They Do)

Dook’s Perky Towers.

Just.

Oh my god. Get big. Do things to me. I don’t-

(Get Big Do Things To Me I Don’t)

Also know that there are, like, god knows how many more. This is some base level stuff. I’ve spent too much fucking time on this shit as it is. I’m actually about to sign off for a tick so I can get some stuff done IRL. For a good long while. But yeah. Some OC’s out there that are either sexy as hell or so fucking effective at what they are trying to do that ya’ll should check ‘em out. 

Anyways, I’m out.

Electric Souls | 2

part one

Pairing: Peter Parker x Reader

Summary : Peter Parker and (y/n) have been best friends since, well forever. And it’s no secret that (y/n) has been harboring the stupidest crush on him. And besides, he never really noticed her. Not like she wanted him to. Because he only seemed to have eyes for Liz Allen.

A/N: Thanks for the love on this!! I didn’t expect so many people to like it. Anyways, I hope this sequel is just as good. Enjoy!

Warnings: swearing, some angst, long-ish

    I never realized how hard it was to study when you’re already preoccupied with being heartbroken. I let out a puff of air and rolled over, letting my gaze wander over the bare ceiling above me. I didn’t expect it to hurt this bad. It felt like there was a weight placed on my chest that I couldn’t possibly get off. For a while the sadness had become overwhelming and I had lied on my bed in a sobbing heaping mess, finding it hard to breathe. But now it seemed as though I had run out of tears to spill. That was proved wrong when I received a text from Michelle. 

     MJ: I still think you should get over him, but are you ok? 

    Once I read her text, a sudden flood of tears blurred my vision once again and a sob escaped my lips. Even in my miserable state, I managed to move my schoolwork safely out of the way of the tears rolling down my cheeks. I collapsed down into the blankets of my bed once every paper was out of danger. I held my pillow to my chest, taking a deep breath and inhaling the usually comforting scent of it. Only this time it only made everything worse when I found it still smelled like Peter from the last time he had been here. As cliche as it sounded, everything was constantly reminding me of him. But I guess that’s just the side effect of the boy you liked being you’re best friend since you were toddlers. 

     I think what hurt the most was that after even more minutes of frantic sobbing into my blankets is that I realized I didn’t just like him. It was so much more. I was completely and utterly in love with him. Everything about him had made me feel light and so happy, happier than anything else was ever able to make me. And I had ruined it. If anything would have given it away to him, it would’ve been the scene I pulled in the hallway. And it was beyond clear he only saw me as a friend. I fucked up-

    A sudden knock cut off my thoughts. I sat up immediately, desperately wiping at my eyes with the sleeves of the over-sized sweatshirt I was wearing. When I finally thought all my tears had been dried up, the skin on my cheeks and under my eyes felt slightly raw. I moved to place my feet on the ground, the contact of the cold hardwood floor to my skin sending a shiver through me. Another knock echoed through the small apartment and I finally willed myself to get up. But who could it be. Not Michelle. Maybe it was Ned? 

    I reached the door just as the shrill buzz of the doorbell rang out. I winced slightly before moving up to the door. I stood on my toes to look through the peephole. I froze at the sight of the familiar face. It was him. 

     Peter turned around, there was no way she was going to answer. He knew he had hurt her. He hated himself for it. The last thing he had ever wanted to do was hurt her. But he had fucked up. She was there in front of him this whole time but he had never realized. He had never realized how perfect, how beautiful, how caring she was. She was literally perfect for him and he was too fucking dumb to even see it. And he could’ve had her. If it weren’t for his own blindness he could’ve been with her. Everything could’ve been alright. But it wasn’t, and it was his fault. He was too late. He knew, now, that he loved her. He always had. Now he would never know what could’ve been. 

    A slight creak came from behind him. Peter picked his head up, spinning around as fast as he could. The sight of her broke his heart. Her (y/e/c) eyes were shining with un-shed tears. Her hair was pulled into a wild bun. Her cheeks looked red and her eyes puffy. She had obviously been crying, a lot. Her fingers nervously held the edges of the over-sized midtown high sweatshirt she was wearing. It hurt to know that it was him that caused her to be in this state. All he was able to do was breathe out her name before pulling her to him and encasing her in his embrace. 

    “Peter what are you-” My voice came out scratchy and faint. Everything had happened in a sudden flash. Peter had spun around immediately when I opened the door. He had just looked at me for a moment, a sad look painted onto his face. Then, he pulled me into a hug. 

    “(y/n) I’m so sorry.” He sniffled. Sorry? Why would he be sorry. He hadn’t done anything. It was only me with my selfish feelings for him. I pushed away from his grip, looking up into his eyes. 

   “Pete why would you be sorry?” He closed his eyes, silently banishing a stray tear that had fallen. He let out a sigh before he opened them again, the same sad look still on his face. 

    “I’ve- I’ve been so oblivious. This whole time. You’ve always been there. And  I should’ve known. I should’ve known. You always did look sad when I talked about Liz. I should’ve known.” I could feel the embarrassment blossoming inside me. My face grew hot, probably now even redder than it had previously been.    

    “Peter I- it was just a stupid crush, I- I’m sorry. You’re happy with Liz, I should be happy for you I-” 

    “No.” I stared at him. It was just a simple word, but it seemed to mean so much more. The expression on Peter’s face was less sad now, more… determined. He took a deep breath for opening his mouth to speak once again. “(y/n) I really wish it didn’t take this for me to see it. But.. I’m in love with you. It seems like I always have been but I’ve just been to blind to see it. I was caught up in all this shit with Liz.. and I never realized. It was you. You were the one who stole my heart away. You were the one who I wanted to see at the end of the day. You’re the girl that I always want to be with, the one that I constantly want to talk to. And it took Michelle for me to finally see that. And for that, I am sorry. I really am.” He looked down, leaving me in complete shock and awe. “And I understand if, if you don’t-”

“Peter Parker.” He looked up at me, his eyes practically melting my heart. He looked like a scared and lost puppy, looking for a home. “Please shut up. Because, I really do love you too.” His face broke into a smile. Suddenly all the pain and heaviness in my chest that plagued me vanished. He stepped forward, bringing his arms around me in another bone crushing hug. “I still hate you for making me go through that, Parker.” He just chuckled, holding me tightly. 

“Don’t worry, I won’t let you leave my sight again.”

A/N: I hope that was okay? sorry for any typos, I type fast :,)

tags : @happylilprompts , @randisnotonfire