i wish i was kidding but this is actually true

• Andi Mack: diverse cast, interesting plot line with continuity, the adults aren’t dumb, the kids have a life outside of school, a actual true progressive show we’ve been waiting for on the Disney channel.

• GMW analyst blogs: Uh, idk, this show isn’t for me. It’s not aimed towards my age group. It’s for little kids . I wished that Girl Meets Mayo had the same freedom tho. Disney Channel was just holding back GMW. Didn’t allow them to be free.

O Helga Natt, yousana style (for tomorrow’s clip)

Hey!

So here I am again with this fic that it’s going to be based on what I’d like to see tomorrow (final clip of 4x09) between Yousana + all the squads scheming together to get those two to talk

I really hope you enjoy it and that it’s not confusing with all the conversations.

———————–x—————————

Have the world’s best summer”

He read it over and over again trying to make sense of what had happened.

For a moment he thought that Sana was finally giving him a chance, he had been over the moon for 5 minutes, the time that it took for her to answer to his text saying that she couldn’t meet him and that she wished he had a nice summer, the world’s best summer, well guess what, he wasn’t.

He looked down at his phone and noticed he had one more notification, a missed call from Noora. Why would Noora called him? He was about to find out.

“Hello?” Noora said

“Hi, Noora? I have a missed call from you?”

“Oh, yes, it’s true. I called you yesterday”

“What for?” Yousef asked

“Uh…well actually it’s because you weren’t answering Sana’s text. I know it sounds stupid but I was worried”

“I left my phone at work and I haven’t got it until now” Yousef explained

“That makes sense.” Noora said “So, did you text Sana back?”

“Yes”

“And when are you meeting?”

“Apparently never” he said bitterly

“Huh?”

“I asked her if we could meet on Friday and she said that she can’t this week and that she wishes I have a nice summer”

“You’re kidding, right?”

“I wish”

“Ah, I can’t believe this girl!” Noora said exasperated

“It’s okay Noora, she’s just not interested in me. I get it”

“No Yousef, you don’t get it. Look, I shouldn’t tell you this but she was really excited to meet you, she…she likes you Yousef and if she’s cancelled your date it’s because something must’ve happened”

“What do you mean she likes me? She doesn’t”

“She does and I’m going to find out what is going on”

“Wait! What should I do? Should I text her? Should I go to see her?”

“No, she clearly needs space. I’ll fix it, we’ll fix it”

“We?”

“I’ll find help, you just…keep on with your life like nothing happened”

“Noora, you just told me that the girl I’m in love with likes me back, you can’t expect me to act like nothing happened”

“For this plan to work you’ll have to”

“What plan?”

“Bye Yousef”

“Noora! What plan?” he said but she had already hanged up the phone.

Yousef sighed and sat down on the bed.

“She likes me” he whispered to himself with a goofy smile “she likes me”

—-x—-


“Pick up, pick up, pick up” Noora said pacing around her room nervously

“Hello?”

“Elias? Hi it’s Noora, Sana’s friend”

“Uh…hi?”

“I know this is weird but I need to talk with you”

“How did you get my number?”

“Vilde”

“Okay…what do you want to talk about?”

“What do you think about Sana and Yousef?” Noora just asked

“What do you mean?”

“What do you think about Sana and Yousef being together? Are you okay with that?”

“Sana and Yousef? I thought Yousef was with you”

“No! Why everybody keeps thinking that?. There’s nothing between us. He’s in love with your sister and she’s pretty much in love with him too”

“Oh…okay uh…Well, I’ve seen those two pining for each other since they met”

“So, you’re okay with them being together?”

“Yes, yes, I’m totally okay with it”

“Cool, ‘cause I need your help”

“My help with what?” Elias asked confused

“We need to get those two to talk. I have a plan. Are you in?”

“Yes, I’m in but what is the plan?”

“Meet me at my house in two hours and I’ll tell you. Oh! And bring the rest boys, they all need to know. And of course you can’t tell anything to Yousef or Sana”

 —x—

“Okay, everyone’s here right?” Noora said as she stood in the middle of the Kollektiv living room

Vilde, Eva and Chris were sitting on one of the couches while Mikael, Adam and Mutta sat in the other one. Isak and Even were also there both sitting on the floor with Isak between Even’s legs and his back resting against his chest. Eskild and Linn were also sitting on the floor around the table. Finally Elias was standing right beside Noora.

“Why are we here exactly?” Eskild asked

“Well, actually I don’t really need you or Linn but since you also live here I thought you could hang out with us if you wanted” Noora said shrugging

“So I don’t have to be here? I can go to my room?” Linn asked

“Yes, Linn you can”

See ya” Linn said standing up and leaving.

“Eskild?”

“Oh no Noora, I’m staying”

“Okay, so the thing is…we need to talk about Sana and Yousef”

“We need to get those two together and soon before Yousef leaves” Elias added

“So Sana likes Yousef? I mean we all knew Yousef’s been in love with her for years but Sana too?”

“Sana likes him a lot!” Vilde said excited

“She told me” Eskild added

“And me!” Isak said

“Okay so long story short, I got Sana to text Yousef so they could meet but then she backed off and…” Noora started

“I’ve talked to my mom. I asked her if she knew something about Yousef and Sana, I told her how I thought they liked each other and I really thought they should be together. Well, she told me that Sana received Yousef’s message while being with her and that she told Sana that she should think about the difficulties she’d have to face if she married Yousef. So basically?” Elias continued

“She backed off because she’s scared” Noora ended

Everyone in the room looked at them trying to process all the information.

“Are you sure you want to be with William, Noora? I mean you two would make a powerful couple” Eskild said pointing at Noora and Elias

“We’re here to talk about Sana and Yousef, Eskild” Noora said rolling her eyes “Okay so I talked to Yousef and I told him Sana liked him and that I’d fix it so that’s why we’re here, to fix it”

“And how are we going to do that?” Eva asked

“Well, we need to lie to them” Elias said

“On Friday Sana will be with us, we will be driving around with our van” Noora explained

“And us boys, we will be with Yousef and we will take him some place he and my sister apparently went in their first and only sort of date. Sana told Noora about it apparently” Elias said

“Yes, she told me that they had been playing basketball and that they had talked, like really talk, for the first time so I think it’d be nice if we plan their meeting there”

“So we will take Yousef there” Elias explained to the boys “Isak, Even you two can come if you want and also your boys. And the girls…”

“We will drive around with Sana and we will take her there without her knowing” Noora finished

Again everyone just stared at them.

“Yeah, I see what you mean” Mutta told Eskild pointing at Noora and Elias “They definitely make an interesting couple”

“Can we focus?” Elias said clapping his hands

“Have you understood what you have to do?” Noora asked “Any questions?”

Eskild raised his hand slowly

“Yes Eskild?”

“I have a question” he said turning to look at Adam and Mikael who were sitting on the couch “How long have you two been dating?”

“What? what are you talking about?” Adam said removing his arm from Mikael’s shoulder and sitting straight.

“You’ve been holding hands since you arrived” Eskild said

“No, we haven’t” Mikael said

“There’s nothing between us, we’re bros that’s it” Adam added

“Okay…whatever…not pressuring you. Just know that my gaydar never fails” Eskild winked at them

“We’re not together” Mikael said

“We’re not. Come on guys say something” Adam looked around waiting for someone to defend them but they were all awkwardly silent.

Guys?” Mikael asked

Even held back a smirk while Elias looked at the floor and Mutta scratched the back of his neck.

“So, what time should we meet tomorrow?” Mutta asked breaking the silence

“Around 8 will be okay, any more questions?” Noora said

 —x—

“Where are we going? I thought we were going to chill at Adam’s” Yousef said on Friday evening as he walked with the boys

“We were, but we thought that we could go to another cool place instead” Elias said

“What cool place?”

“Well…”

 –x–

“Why are you stopping Chris?” Sana asked as she sat inside their Loser van

“Uh, I think we can rest for awhile here” Chris said

“Where are we?” Sana said trying to look at the windows but Noora Vilde and Eva were blocking her view

“Okay Sana? We need to talk” Noora said

 –x–

“What are we doing here?” Yousef said when he realized where he was “What is this?”

“Yousef man, we need to talk” Elias said “We need to talk about my sister”

“Sana? What about her?”

Well, see that van parked over there?” Elias said pointing behind him “She’s inside”

“What? Why? What is going on?” Yousef said anxiously

–x–

“Sana…look where we are” Eva said moving so she could see

Sana got closer to the window and recognized the place instantly. They were on the basketball court where she and Yousef had had their first and only real conversation.

“But how? Why? What are we doing here?” Sana asked confused

“Yousef is here, Sana” Noora said “And you two need to talk”

“Noora…”

“Just listen to me okay?” she said “Sana that boy, he’s in love with you and you’re in love with him and I know you’re scared because you think that you two can’t be together, I know you think that it’ll be impossible but Sana he’s a good guy, you know that. He would never do anything to hurt you. And look, at the end of the day, this is your decision and we will respect it but you need to at least talk to him and tell him how you feel.”

 –x–

“Yousef I know you’re in love with my sister”

“Elias…I…”

“And she’s in love with you”

“What?”

“She’s in love with you but she’s scared. She thinks that you two can’t be together because you’re not muslim. But you are Yousef, you are the most muslim boy I know, you’re the best guy I know and I wouldn’t want anyone else for my sister. And I know you two can make it work. All you have to do is talk to each other, prove to her that you’re worth it”

 –x–

“Sana, are you really in love with him?” Noora asked

Sana nodded holding back the tears

“So go there and tell him”

 –x–

“Yousef, are you really in love with her?” Elias asked

Yousef nodded closing his eyes

“So go there and tell her”

 –x–

Sana took a deep breath and got out of the van. A few meters from her she saw Yousef standing with Elias and the rest of the boys, but he wasn’t looking at them, he was looking at him.

 –x–

Yousef saw her getting out of the van, his heart skipped a beat and before he could stop himself he started walking towards her, his eyes never leaving hers.

 –x–

She walked towards him and for a moment it was like the rest of the world didn’t exist. It was as if she was walking in slow motion, her eyes never leaving his.

 –x–

They kept walking towards each other until they were only a step away.

“I’m in love with you” both of them said at the same time

They stared at each other’s eyes, trying to process their words.

“I’m sorry” again, they spoke at the same time.

Yousef couldn’t help but chuckle while Sana shook her head smiling. They either didn’t talk at all or they wanted to talk at the same time.

“You first” Yousef nodded

“I’m sorry Yousef, I’m sorry for giving you mixed signals and for being always back and forth with you. I just…I’m in love with you but I’m scared, scared that we won’t work. I thought…I thought that I’d rather lose you now than in a few years” she said as tears were rolling down her face

“But you don’t have to lose me. Sana, I’m in love with you, I’ve been in love with you pretty much since I met you. And I know it’s not going to be easy and that we will have bad moments but I think that the good moments will be totally worth it. Sana I respect you and I respect your faith and I would never ever do anything to make you feel uncomfortable.”

“I know you wouldn’t…” She said sniffling

He swallowed hard trying to keep his own tears from falling

“Sana is your choice and I’ll respect it but…don’t you think that a chance of being together is worth the risk?”

“It won’t be easy” she warned him

“I don’t want easy, I want you, just the way you are”

“And you’re leaving tomorrow” she said looking at the floor

“I’m not”

“What?” she looked up at him frowning

“You said you couldn’t meet this week so I postponed the flight a month” he said shrugging

“What? Why would you do that?”

“Don’t you remember? Alt for deg girl”

Sana’s face lit up and her lips curved into a big smile. She took the step that was keeping them apart and wrapped her arms around his neck. He was taken aback for a moment but soon hugged her back.

“Does this mean you’re giving us a chance?” he whispered in her ear

She pulled apart and looked at him with a big smile

“Yes”

“Yeah?” he asked smiling

“Yes” she nodded

“SHE SAID YES!” he shouted using his hands to amplify his voice

Suddenly everyone started to cheer them, on one side the girl squad who had been standing by the van the whole time and were now hugging each other, and on the other side the balloon squad and the boy squad who were clapping their hands and patting each other’s backs excited.

“They’re going to think that you just proposed to me or something” Sana laughed

“I can’t help it. I’m the happiest man alive right now. Are you happy?” he asked grinning at her

“I’m happy” she said smiling right back at him.

——-x——

Prompt:  Hey I don’t know if you’re taking any prompts but I have one based on today’s clip… Noora has had enough of the will they/won’t they with Yousana, and decides to get the girl squad, balloon squad, boy squad/Evak etc to help her FINALLY get yousana together to talk and admit their feelings for each other. Basically everyone scheming to get those kids together.. thank you xx

So this is it!

I hope you’ve liked it!

If Julie screws up tomorrow at least we will always have this

Just imagine that Yousef and Sana walking towards each other was in slow motion okay?

And YES I’m going to hint at Elias x Noora and Mikael x Adam for the rest of my life until they’re canon

Thank you so much for reading!!!

dumb college/profession au/future shit

I know the most common thing to do with dirk is to make him go into robotics or engineering and I GET it, but on the other hand: artist dirk

dirk is among the kids we see with the most actual artistic talent (the others being rose and roxy; dave isn’t bad before he adopts shitpost art as his signature style, but, well, you do you, kid). as far as homestuck goes, his style is basically as realistic and true-to-life as it gets.

can you imagine dirk doodling in all the edges of his margins. dirk quietly wishing he could pursue art but thinking it’s not “serious” enough, telling himself it’s not a “real” profession, going into engineering or robotics or something similar instead and everyone being like “oh of course dirk would” but all the kid wants to do is draw, he just thinks it’s shitty and embarrassing and “it’s like having a degree in creative writing, the fuck can you do with it”

jake, who is majoring in anthropology but can’t decide on a minor because everything else is too damned interesting, discovers dirk’s private (sfw) sketchbook and is astounded. dirk is humiliated. jake manages to convince him to at least MINOR in art. dirk tries to amend it to a minor in art history but jake will not stand for it

The Summer Guide

Now that summer is here (for most people, sorry Australia!) I’ve prepared a list of 5 things to do this July. However I put aside the usual stuff. That means no redundant things like going to the beach or going on ‘vacation’. This list is your quick guide to what to do if you are stuck at home this summer. I’ll be using it just as much as you! Now bear in mind that this is more catered to those who live in cities rather than small towns. I am a city kid after all. Enjoy!

Keep reading

The Joker x Reader- “Grandpa”

The Joker just had a heart attack at 55; he was ordered to rest and not do anything for a while. Of course he’s not the one to accommodate the doctor’s recommendations but you are there to make sure he complies. And the adorable grandson visiting all the time makes things better no matter what.

Related to LOST saga: http://diyunho.tumblr.com/post/154759609421/the-joker-x-reader-x-dead-son-lost

The Joker is in bed, flipping through the TV channels, bored as hell and beyond.

“Baby, look who’s here to see you again!” you announce and open the door, letting your 5 year old grandchild in the bedroom.

“Grandpaaa!!!” Alexis charges at the bed, jumping on it to sit by J.

“Hello, Pumpkin,” he kisses the kid on the top of the head, then feels the need to add: “…and don’t call me grandpa, I told you before, yes?” he tickles the little one. “I’m not that old, I just turned 55.”

“That’s pretty old,” you mutter and J grabs the drawing handed over by his grandson, huffing:

“I heard that, Princess!”

“You can call him grandpa, honey, don’t mind him,” you ignore your husband’s nonsense.”Don’t confuse Alexis, ok?”

“Whatever! You guys always plot against me,” The Joker complains (what else is new?), bringing the paper closer to his face. “HA!HA!HA!HA!” he cracks up, seeing the  five sticks and a circle with a bunch of green lines around it representing him. “The kid nailed it, he has talent!” he kisses the child’s forehead, smitten with the masterpiece. “You absolutely captured how handsome I am,” he winks, amused on a whole different level.

“You like it grandpa?” Alexis smiles, excited to see J is so happy.

“Oh, I absolutely love it!” and he begins to laugh with all his heart noticing the stick figure laying down at his feet, wearing a black cape, representing Batsy. “Oh my God, this is great!” The Joker proudly states, not bored anymore. “This is going on the fridge, Kitten! Actually no, I’m gonna frame it! Great job, give me a kiss.”

Your grandson reaches over to peck J’s cheek and the inevitable question arises again ( he asks this at least twice a week):

“Why are you so pale, grandpa?”

You snicker, going through your clothes in the walk-in closet, but eavesdropping on them like you always do. The Joker always tells the same story and Alexis listens with his mouth opened every single time:

“When grandma fell from heaven right in front of me, she was so beautiful that I died for a few minutes, but then she kissed me and brought me back to life. Ain’t that right, Doll?”

“Suuureeeee,” you peek out of your spot, amazed how J’s baloney sounds so interesting to your grandchild, even if he heard it a million times.

“I was dead for a while, that’s why I look so pale.”

“Waaaahhhh,” the kid gasps, fascinated, kissing The Joker’s cheek again.

“Isn’t grandma beautiful? How was I supposed not to die when I saw her?” he devilishly smirks.

“Yesssss,” Alexis meows when his grandpa squeezes his face together.

“She doesn’t look a day over 50, am I right?”

“Yessss,” the child agrees again, squeaking under J’s embrace.

“That’s because I am 50!” you shout, irritated.

You certainly didn’t marry him for his flattery skills.

“What did I tell you, hm?” The Joker purrs. “Your grandma’s a fox! Hey,” he whispers, ”you got a girlfriend since last time I saw you?” (which was… 2 days ago), your husband teases the little one, elbowing him and he giggles like crazy.

“N-no, nooooo!” he struggles to respond, trying to catch his breath, even if he doesn’t really understands the meaning.

“You’re not missing anything,” The Joker continues to whisper, accomplice with his grandson. “She starts out as your girl, then she wants to get married, then she wants to have kids and she keeps on telling you what to do. Princess! Nobody tells me what to do!!!” he yells, addressing the issue and you would answer if you would give a damn.  He just hears your heavy sigh from the closet so he lowers his voice again:

“What did I tell you? Probably she’s rolling her eyes right now.” He’s right, you are because you can still distinguish their “man to man” conversation. “Don’t get a sassy girl like grandma, alright? She’s very feisty! Pinky promise?” J gets deeply secretive and Alexis agrees to it, sealing the pact with his tiny finger. It feels really important so he kisses J’s cheek once more, thrilled they have another secret together.

“Grandpa, are you going to die?” the sudden question unexpectedly comes and it makes you sad. It was a child’s innocent curiosity but it really pulls at your heartstrings.

“Nooo, I’m not going to die: grandma would kill me and never speak to me again.”

“Exactly!” you take a step out of your sanctuary, then turn around and go back in so they won’t see your teary eyes.

“What did I tell you, hm? She’s so feisty, don’t get a feisty woman. Actually, I take it back: get one, they’re awesome.”

Alexis repeatedly nods a yes, not having a clue about what The Joker is rambling about, but signs he’s going to keep his lips sealed. Him and J are great ones for secrets nobody knows about.

You finally get fed up sorting out all your dresses so you come out, joining the guys’ club on the bed. The kid screams and jumps up and down until your catch him in your arms and cover him in kisses. He absolutely loves it since you two spoil him rotten.

“You look like your dad when he was your age,” you get sentimental, remembering when Kase was a baby.” Alexis hugs you and laughs in your ear, wanting to play some more.

“You know what that means, Y/N: Kase resembles me so well and when this kiddo grows up, he will probably look like me too. I have such amazing, strong genes!” The Joker concludes, flaring his arms around.

“Yeah, baby, it’s all you, you didn’t get any help,” you scoff, lifting your grandchild up in the air and he snickers, urging you to lift him higher.” I wish I could but you’re heavyyyyy!!!” you grunt, still making an effort and he screams up a storm, delighted and laughing.

“I really think we should have a granddaughter,” J brings up the subject again. “ I need a tiny Princess to play with; she’ll have to have my charm and your attitude.”
“Shut up, J!” you snarl at him and he kicks you with his leg.

“I’m going to put in an order with our kid and his girlfriend, we waited enough.”

“It’s not a McDonald’s drive-thru where you just go and order a granddaughter,” you shake your head, wishing this one was actually true.

“Yes it is. I am The Joker and if I want something I get it.”

He’s overconfident on this one.

“Can I go play in my room?” Alexis jumps from the bed on the floor, hyper and energetic after he warn you out. He has his own room at the Penthouse since he sleeps over so often.

“Yes, you can go,” you agree, falling on your back on the soft pillows, drained. “Goodness, he has so much stamina,” you inhale, watching him storm out of the bedroom.

“Just like me, I told you I have good genes,” J really makes it a point of reminding you.

You crawl in bed by him and tuck a rebel strand of green hair behind his ear, smiling, letting him have it:

“You do, you really do.”

“Don’t think I didn’t notice your red eyes. Were you crying in the closet?” J frowns, tracing your lips with his thumb.

You avert your gaze, gulping, and he forces you to look at him:

“I just had a stupid heart attack, I’m not dying or anything, got it?”

“U-hum,” you sniffle, cuddling to him.

“I mean, come on, you would probably drag me out of the coffin so you can send me to get you a diamond necklace you want or something. Am I right?” he caresses your back and you chuckle:

“Yes, I would.”

“See? I can’t disgracefully embarrass myself like that at my own funeral, it would be a disaster. So I have to postpone the moment.”

“Wow, you and your scenarios,” you actually laugh even if you are not in the mood to.

“Hey, Y/N, wanna fool around later on?” The Joker kisses you, covering both of you with the blanket.

“No, the doctor said you can’t strain yourself.”

“Huh??!!! Since when having sex means I’m straining myself?” he mutters, annoyed.

“You’ll have to ask the doctor, baby,” you nonchalantly reply, entertained on how stubborn he is all the time.

“What?! I’m not gonna ask the doctor if I can sleep with my wife. No way!“

“I wouldn’t risk it,” you try to reason with him.

I’m a natural, ok?! Pfftttt, straining myself,” J mocks, insulted, squeezing you in his arms.

“Oh,” you suddenly remember, “time to take your med,” and you get out of bed, searching for it on the coffee table.

“I’m not taking that stupid pill, I don’t need it!” he whines, unhappy.

“You’re worse than Alexis, you know that?” you scold him, taking one tablet out of the foil.

“You can’t make me take it!” he pouts.

Well, I guess there is only one thing left to do.

“If you take your medication we can full around later tonight,” you wink at him, biting on your lip.

“This is sabotage, Kitten!” he squints his blue eyes, sulking. “But you have good negotiation skills. Deal!” he reaches his hand for the tablet and you give it to him. “And I want you to wear that red outfit I like,” he grins, anticipating all the fun.

“Which one? I have about 50 red ones.”

“The red, lacy one.”

“Which one? That narrows it down to about 15.”

“Jesus, Doll, the strapless one.”

“Two piece or one piece?”

“The two piece, woman!!!!” he raises his voice, impatient.

“Oh, that one,” you pretend you finally got it even if you knew all along. You just love to tease him. “Wanna have another heart attack, old man? That’s a very indecent outfit,” you smile and he takes his pill, lifting his shoulders.

“Not the worse way to die,” he grinds his teeth, rightfully concluding it’s worth the risk.

“Alright, you asked for it,” you pucker your lips, realizing it’s so quiet. “I think I will go check on our grandson, I don’t like this calm before the storm,” you let J know, certain the kid is definitely up to something.

“I’ll be waiting, Princess,” The Joker purrs as you head towards the door.

“Fine, get ready; you’re in for a treat,” you tease him before closing the door behind you.

“I don’t have to get ready, you know I’m a natural!” he shouts and hears you giggle as you walk away.

Definitely worth having a sassy woman in your life, The Clown Prince Of Crime decides, wanting to take a nap before the grand finale tonight.

Also read; MASTERLIST

http://diyunho.tumblr.com/post/153664676321/joker-x-reader-masterlist

Twist of Fate (Pt 2)

Hey guys! Part 2 is finally here after days of procrastination and exams! I quite like the direction of the plot so far. It’s something I’ve never seen before which is nice. Hope you all enjoy!

Part 1 : Here


               Betty finally spoke out, praying for the moment to finally be over. Jughead’s face flushed red as he remembered she didn’t know her way around.

               "Sorry, sorry. Um, yeah it’s right through here.“ The beanie-clad boy stumbled over his words, eventually managing to form a coherent sentence. He looked over at his new roommate and noticed her eyes shining in amusement. They were walking past the open lounge area and into a hallway that consisted of 3 doors. One, that Betty assumed held residency of Jughead, had a large poster on the outside of "A Rebel Without a Cause”. Betty stopped, entranced by the poster.

               "You like “A Rebel Without a Cause”?“ She asked, studying the poster more thoroughly. It wasn’t a promotional poster, it looked like it was made for some place called the Twilight Drive-In. Betty had heard of that place, it was in the next town over called Greendale. She often went there and put in some suggestions but soon heard it got closed down due to lack of funding.

               "Yeah, I’m a sucker for the classics. Don’t get me wrong, Nicholas Ray did a great job. But I’m more of a Tarantino guy myself. I don’t know what is it but I find something so intoxicatingly beautiful about his work. It’s always a masterpiece, you can tell this guy loves what he does. I don’t know, I guess I just respect that. True art forms.” Jughead babbles on whilst Betty listened, intrigued by the topic. He was shocked that she hadn’t even looked the least bit bored. He’d never gotten this far before without either being told to shut up or boring people half to death.

               "I fully agree! As a kid I used to love “Pulp Fiction” but lately I’ve been more about the “Kill Bill” series. And although Tarantino is possibly the best director in this generation, I’ll always have a soft spot for Ray. I wish I could’ve lived in the 50s.“ Betty responds with enthusiasm and actual knowledge. Jughead is shocked. He can’t help but crack out a goofy grin, maybe this roommate wouldn’t be so unbearable. Although, nothing could be worse than Archie Andrews. "Also, is this from the Twilight Drive-In?” Betty thought it was a long shot but she had to ask, it was all too familiar.

               "Yeah, how did you know that?“ He quipped, wondering how on earth she knew the place he’d spent his entire childhood. Jughead was very defensive over his childhood. It was filled with a lot of heartbreak, betrayal and distrust. He was born into a house that lacked solidarity. His father was a raging alcoholic; his mother was a selfish, egotistical maniac that shouldn’t have been graced with the ability to reproduce. His sister was the only stability that Jughead could grasp on to. Jellybean was the only thing that he stuck around for.

               The drive-in was an important part of his childhood. He would sneak himself and JB through the back and into the crowd, just to spend at least an hour or two away from their parents. Jellybean never got enough sleep, neither did Jughead. The arguing, the smashing of fragile objects, the crying. Sometimes it got too much. His dad would come home one night, reeking of cheap booze and cigarette smoke, and then his mother would snap.

               The drive-in offered clarity and escape for the two children. Though it was short lived when social services caught the bruises on Jughead and the burns on JB. Nothing was said but the police knew what had been happening. The Jones name had a reputation in the town of Greendale. The family with the town drunk, the selfish bitch, the outcast boy and the sweet little girl. It wasn’t longer before both kids were put into the social system and separated.

               How he got the poster was another story. One he isn’t quite proud of but it needed to happen. When his 3rd foster family had refused to shelter him any further, he ran away. Jughead went back to Greendale. He didn’t know what he was expecting, he had been gone for 6 years and as a 16 year old he didn’t exactly look the same. He tried finding his parents and instead found a sight that broke his heart.

               At the drive-in, Jughead saw his father’s old truck. He aimlessly walked over, expecting to see him passed out in the back. But instead he saw his father who looked cleaned up and sober, his mother who was smiling, cuddled next to her husband. But the sight that broke his heart the most, Jellybean wrapped up in both of their arms, looking like a completely different kid.

               Jughead didn’t bother staying to watch the movie. Not even "A Rebel Without a Cause” could make him stay. He had been cheated, rejected and most importantly, he had been broken. Even his own family can’t stand to have him around. Ripping a poster from the wall, he made his way to a destination he was uncertain of. With hot tears stinging the frozen skin of his face, he wondered why no one had the capability to love him.

               "I used to go there all of the time as a teenager. I loved it there.“ Betty gushed, not turning to look at Jughead but instead focusing her attention on the poster. It’s not like Jughead kept it up there to torture himself, it was a powerful reminder that the past is the past . And although it may be painful, it helped us to get where we are now. Betty turned around to the door opposite Jughead’s, noticing the bright yellow post-it note on the door saying "Betty Cooper’s Room”. The handwriting was messy but Betty found it charming.

               "Ah, yeah. That’s your room. The room down the hall, just there, is my office.“ Jughead pushed open Betty’s door and helped her to carry her stuff inside. The room was moderately large. It was about the size of Betty’s room back home, maybe a tad larger. The walls were neatly painted a pastel green that looked almost white. It was furnished with all the necessities; a bed, a walk in wardrobe, a desk and a tall lamp tucked away in the corner. She seemed to have her own bathroom as well. A low set window sill was parallel to her bed, it was very wide. Betty already had ideas of all the aesthetic Instagram photos she could take. The view was incredible.

               "This room is beautiful. Are you sure the rent is high enough?” Betty stared, doe-eyed. Jughead didn’t know what to say. He couldn’t tell the truth, not yet. Instead he merely shrugged, offering her a boyish smirk. “That’s not exactly an answer Mr…” Betty trailed off, suddenly realizing she didn’t even know her own roommates last name. Then again, they had only met 10 minutes ago.

               "Jones. It’s Mr. Jones.“ Jughead offered, still smirking at the blonde haired girl stood in front of him. He looked down at his watch, noticing the time. "Well, I better leave you to unpack and get settled. It around 4 now so when do you want dinner?” He asked, opening the door wider to step through. Betty nodded, quickly throwing her backpack onto the ground before beaming up to him.

               "You cook?“ She asked, amusement evident on her features. At first, Jughead wanted to reply saying that he was forced to learn due to his prior parents being a waste of space. Instead he settled with a wink.

               "I can do a lot Cooper. Eating food is a huge hobby of mine.” He threw back, chuckling slightly. Betty returned with a small giggle and unzipped her suitcase, pulling out items of clothing and packing them into the wardrobe. She seemed to have a lot of clothes, this reminded him of Veronica almost instantly.

               "I’m a good cook too. How about I start packing now and come help you at around 6? It can be a roommate bonding session.“ Betty joked, disappearing and reappearing whilst putting her stuff away in various locations. He statement make Jughead’s heart swell. He didn’t know this girl but she seemed nice enough. He truly did believe they were going to get on just fine. Maybe he could add another member to the Scooby gang. Which, at the moment, only consisted of him, Archie and Veronica.

               "Sure, Cooper.” Betty poked her tongue out playfully at his remark, watching him pace out of the room. She continued packing but at a faster rate this time. A huge part of her couldn’t wait for 6 o'clock. Jughead walked into the lounge and threw himself onto the couch next to Archie, who was playing Fallout 4 on the 65" flat screen Jughead got gifted last year.

               "How’s the new roommate? Lasting well without me and Ronnie?“ Archie’s eyes were glued to the screen but Jughead could tell he was teasing. Slapping his arm softly, he was about to reply when the front door swung open. Stood in a navy blue dress, obviously accompanied with pearls, was the raven-haired princess Jughead learned to love. She had a huge grin spread across her deep red lips, her eyebrows raised in anticipation. Speak of the Devil and she shall appear.

               "Where’s this new roommate I’ve heard so much about, Juggiekins?” She too teased, coming over to embrace him in a hug, placing a firm kiss on his cheek. Instinctively, he wiped his cheek which only making Veronica smirk. Betty heard someone come in and decided to check out who it was. Little did she know what kind of surprise would be hitting her.

               As soon as she walked into the room and saw Veronica, her heart stopped beating. God seems to have graced Betty with one of the greatest gifts she could’ve asked for. It seemed almost too good to be true at this point. When Veronica spun around the meet Betty’s gaze, her jaw fell. Her lips were parted and both girls stood in shock. Jughead and Archie sat, confused at what was happening.

               "Ronnie?“ Betty beamed hopefully. The next few seconds were a blur, The girls ran towards each other at full force, knocking them both onto the ground. They were hugging whilst loudly crying and muffling incoherent words. Jughead was beyond confused by now. How did they know each other? After what felt like forever, the girls separated. Both were crying yet smiling so happily.

               "I can’t believe you’re here. This is so crazy!” Ronnie cried out, pulled Betty into another hug. Archie was about to speak up until Ronnie pulled back again. “Boys, this is my long-time internet friend, Betty Cooper. We lost touch sometime last year but, oh god am I glad to see you.” Veronica explained. “We have so much to catch up on, come on!” In an instant both girls were at their feet, running into Betty’s room and closing the door.

               "Wait. I’m confused. So your new roommate is best friends with your sister?“ Archie whispered quietly, not wanting the girls to hear. Jughead was still in a state of shock. How had he never known about Veronica knowing Betty? At dinner he’d always heard her babble on about this friend she had but he never listened. Now he’s starting to wish he did.

               "Don’t ask me pal, we’re in the same boat.” He spoke out, still bewildered. How is it that the girl he chooses out of 50 other applicants, just happens to be his sister’s best friend? That’s not a coincidence, that’s the work of the lord above.

               Jughead didn’t want Betty to know that Veronica was his family. It’d bring up too much personal family stuff for their friendship at the moment. In time, he wants to share everything about himself. Who he really is, his job, his family, his aspirations. But right now, the story was far too complicated and Jughead was in no frame of mine to give that out.

               He reminisced about the past. The heartbreak after the drive in, the weeks alone in the cold, Hiram Lodge spotting him sleeping behind a dumpster in Brooklyn. He was on the brink of death but the Lodge’s took him in, treated him like a son. They fed him, built up his strength and gave him a warm place to sleep. Jughead was forever in their favor. It wasn’t long before the adoption occurred and Jughead was officially Forsythe Jones-Lodge. Though he preferred to go by Jones. He may hate his family but Jones is more fitting for such an obscure name.

               "Maybe it won’t be so bad. Betty doesn’t seem like the type to judge. Just tell her about the past and tell her about the Blue and Gold. Stop building up walls and refusing to knock them down.“ His red headed friend squeezed his shoulder reassuringly. Jughead couldn’t though. The sad look in Archie’s eye only proved that Arch didn’t believe he could either. It takes time to trust. Even if he feels like Betty will be different, he didn’t want her to be his reckoning.


I hope you all enjoyed this part 2! It’s slightly longer but not as long as I’d like it to be! After I get my exams out of the way I’ll be able to write more! These two weeks cannot come fast enough. As always, feedback is very much appreciated and it warmed my heart to see how many of you loved part 1! There’s gonna be a lot more!

((Subtle plug but my asks are open too if anyone wants to send in prompts for a one shot or just generally wants to talk! I don’t bite ;P))


**PART 3 : here **

alright so you know me i can’t go making a fluffy post without balancing things out 

so i just noticed something while making that last post actually and it kinda may have messed me up a bit so that’s why i’m sharing it tho ofc this could be just me hardcore headcanoning again but  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

so dennis mentions this

and yuya’s reaction to learning that dennis was yusho’s student intrigued me a bit because

obviously something just clicks in his head like right that makes sense now

but he doesn’t look too happy about it unlike the first time he suspected it

and well with recent events, we know yuya has his memories of being zarc back

which also include knowledge of the fact he isn’t really yusho’s son

then by the end of the duel, there’s some kids gathered around yuya asking him to teach them Entertainment Dueling

but what does yuya say

“Teach them the true Entertainment Dueling my father taught you!

as in, the true Entertainment Dueling Yusho taught Dennis for the past 3 years he wasn’t there to teach it to Yuya.

listen… we know Yuya has a habit of hiding his pain with a smile and

well

i mean… he’s doing it… and then he turns away

from then on we don’t really see if he keeps actually smiling for long…

Teach them, Dennis. Teach them the Entertainment Dueling I wish I had been taught.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

make sure it's the good stuff, none of that aunt gemima or no name garbage lol

Omg no worries ahaha actually-
-This is maybe the most stereotypical canadian thing I’ve ever said but right now, at this very moment, I have 50 homemade bottles of Maple syrup in my basement.

anonymous asked:

are you personal friends with Dan? i just get the feeling like that's true you seem like you know a lot about him and like someone he'd hang out with

Yeah actually, we met at a coffee shop in NYC when he was visiting his family and we text sometimes.

Just kidding!!! I wish! No I don’t know him but wouldn’t life be grand if we were friends? Ah… I’d enjoy it..

9

QUEENS THAT SASHAYED AWAY TOO SOON: VIVACIOUS

“To be honest, at first, I was mentally kicking myself, I could not believe I left so early. I really thought I was going to handle it worse mentally, but to be honest, it didn’t worry me at all. I asked God to have me traveling and performing for the children, and he granted my wish. I was out in the universe and not worried about it at all. I was actually in Los Angeles doing shows when my elimination episode aired. Honestly, I am taking it as it goes. From what I am hearing, my departure is the biggest upset next to Latrice Royale going home. Many people don’t think I should have gone home so early, but I was lucky and left in a costume of my own style, a true Club Kid!”

The Magic Dragon shaped Elephant in the Room

You know what’s been getting on my nerves? How Dragon Ball Super is handling Future Mai.

Originally posted by neogohann

Now don’t get me wrong, my issue isn’t with the show making an effort to pair her and Trunks up together. Honestly it’s a ship I never knew I needed until now. No, my issue lays in a fundamental fact of Mai’s character that isn’t being addressed… The fact that she’s been around since Dragon Ball.

Hell, she was essentially the second-in-command to Dragon Ball’s first arc villain, Emperor Pilaf. She’s been around since the very beginning. She fought Goku when he was a kid. Keep in mind how long a time period both Dragon Ball and Dragon Ball Z cover, and Mai doesn’t make much of an appearance again after the Demon King Piccolo arc until all the way in Battle of Gods (and GT if you count that). Speaking of GT, this is rather close to how Mai should look nowadays.

But of course, Pilaf and the gang got to make a wish to Shenron prior to Battle of Gods, and in true Pilaf fashion they screwed it up and now they’re kids again.

This, I have no problem with. I always loved the Pilaf gang as characters and have always wanted to see them come back. The issue before was that they were so old now that they couldn’t really do anything, so making a wish on the Dragon Balls was a nice little solution to that. It’s amusing to see Pilaf finally reach the goal he’d been striving for since the beginning of Dragon Ball, to actually use the magical orbs… And then completely fuck it up.

Now I don’t have an issue with the now pint-sized Pilaf gang now really making any mention of their past with Goku and the gang. Fact of the matter is that they are kids, no one would really suspect them of being who they are. Hell, they actually do bring it up a couple of times that they’re only pretending to be kids, mostly on Pilaf’s end granted, but it is addressed. No one sees it of course, but that simply adds to the hilarity. The fact that Pilaf and his group were so not worth anyone’s time that everyone completely forgot about them (though it does irk me that Bulma of all people can’t make the connection).

(C’mon Bulma you’re smarter than this)

All of that, I don’t mind. I find it amusing even. No, my issue lay solely on Future Mai. I won’t ask how exactly the Mai from Trunk’s timeline stayed so young, since the Pilaf gang got turned young again after the Buu saga, far after Trunks came back and created a new timeline. That’s Dragon Ball lackadaisical “science” at its best.

But the fact remains it is the same Mai. That somehow she did manage to stay young. This is a fact. Now of course Trunks wouldn’t notice it, Pilaf was way before his time and when he travels back to the past in Super he finds Mai to be a child, which would fit in with his perception of her. Whether Future Bulma noticed or not is hard to say, I’d like to think she did, but never brought it up because what good would that do now? Future Mai had obviously long reformed from her criminal ways and was honestly earnest to help humanity survive. The more the merrier.

By this point the only person who could’ve possibly known Mai’s true origins was Goku himself, when he and Vegeta joined Trunks on the trip to the future. They actually talk to each other, which must have been so bizarre for her now that I think about it. Now I don’t blame Goku for not recognizing her. He’s not the most… observant person when it comes to anything not related to fighting, and it’s been established that he doesn’t really recall what Pilaf and his mooks looked like despite them playing a huge part in his first adventure… Despite Mai looking exactly the same now as she did when he was a kid.

(Seriously even her coat is the same)

So far all of this is excusable. It annoys me that Goku or Bulma don’t recognize them, but I get it. What’s really driven me to make this post is the fact that Future Mai doesn’t even bat an eye when she sees Goku again, doesn’t even seem to recognize him in fact. This is a man she lived most of her adult life in abject terror in, and she has literally no reaction whatsoever to him. No small line of dialogue, no thought process, not even a change in expression.

Fine, I get it. They have much bigger things to worry about. But at the moment it just feels like this huge elephant in the room. Now I’m not asking for Mai to go up to Goku and be like, “Oh yeah I tried to kill you when you were a kid I’m secretly very old.” Just any acknowledgement would be nice at this point.

Though I have to wonder if when Black showed up on the scene Mai’s first thought would be something along the lines of, “This has to be the kid who turned into a giant monkey all those years ago… I knew he was a monster.”

When I was a kid, I didn’t have the leeway to smile. I idolized the Italians who showed up in movies and books. I dreamed about smiling cheerfully, like them. And now–that dream’s come true. I wish this great time would last forever. It’s a dumb wish. Still, I feel really lucky just to be able to make it.
—  Firo Prochainezo
fic search #135

Looking for multiple fills on these!

1. So if you know if there are any fan fictions about jongdae having a solo album or going solo? 

2. Hello! I love your blog and that is why I visit it everyday! I keep up with the daily updates but recently I’ve been visiting that kid!au, singledad!au etc. And I wanted to know of you guys or the followers know about any new fics about adoption or family In general?! (Mpreg, adoption, family, singledad, kids) I am craving for some new fics or update! Appreciate the hard work and the recommendations <3 

  • Plus One (Xiumin/Luhan with child!Yixing)

3. Hi admins, do you know of any stories where someone wishes for something (usually impossible or highly unlikely) that actually comes true? Example: In “Our Way Home”, where teddy bear soo becomes human after making a wish

4. it’s official, i’ve cleaned out the top!tao tag 😭 do you guys have anything else you could reccommend? thanks so much for running this blog btw! it really helped me out in finding specific fics! 😘

5. any fics with hybrid!yeol? i’ve gone through the hybrid tag but i can’t find much :( i’ve read all the fics involving hybrid!yeol… thank you!!

6. I hope you don’t mind me asking but do you know of any fuckboi like fan fics?

7a. Hi! Have you stumbled upon new free verse/poetry/experimental fic? I’ve read everything filed under creative context and I need more :(( 

7b. Also, can you rec fics set in wartime where exo are rebels/soldiers? Any pairing is fine, and I need me some character death. Thanks for your hardwork!

8. Hello! May I ask if you have any fics about the mv “Gone” by Jin where Minseok appeared there? I want any fics that deals with his heart problems or what happens after he passed out. Thank you!

9. Fics where Kyungsoo is clingy? Like he likes to cuddle and hugs and is into PDA? I only know fic that portray him as cold but I don’t think he really is. Anyway thank you for your hard work

10. Are there any fics that involve the members revolting against SM or just another boss in general?

11. do you have any sugar daddy aus with jongdae as part of the main pairing?

12.  Do you guys know of any fics where a (main or side) character’s dream represents something or foreshadows an event? Is that too vague?

13.  Do u know any switch!hunhan fics? I can’t seem to find any except for hoe-sehoon’s fic(I love her so much) thanks!

14. has anyone ever seen a threesome fic thats an m/f/f pairing?

How is life different as an INTJ woman?

Hey there, I’m an INTJ male. I want to try to better empathize what life as a woman is like, and I was thinking that I could gain some interesting perspective by asking females with relatable personalities about their life experiences.
I know that you as individuals don’t speak for all women or even INTJ women, but I’m hoping I might find some parallels between y'all. Thanks!-and please let me know if these aren’t the questions I should be asking.

This is my response to a reddit question.

How did the societal expectations of femininity influence your life? (Throughout the different stages of your life)

It was very difficult throughout my life. I was always a tomboy. I got along well with boys but less so with girls, especially when I entered elementary school. I was really into He Man but not Barbie. I loathed dresses. I wanted to be Peter Pan because he could fly and got to fight pirates, while Wendy was stuck at home with the kids. Not having any strong female role models in movies really hurt me. I actually wished I’d been born a boy because I thought girls had to be domestic weaklings who were scared of reptiles. I didn’t feel like I could be both myself and a girl.

When I got older I realized that wasn’t true, but it didn’t change the fact that I was different. I didn’t care about how I dressed. I was all about comfort and didn’t comprehend style. It made me stand out as a nerd. In junior high everyone started wearing their book bags on one shoulder. I thought this was really stupid as it was horribly uncomfortable, but everyone made fun of me for wearing my backpack properly. Then at the start of eighth grade I decided to try to fit in. I bought a whole new wardrobe, styled my hair in the horrible early nineties fashion, and wore by backpack on one shoulder. Of course that same year everyone went back to two shoulders because I guess it finally dawned on them that massive weight on one shoulder is really uncomfortable. But I digress… I fit in, kind of.

In high school my friends and I landed in a clique that actually loved freshman, so that was nice. I had a larger social circle and felt somewhat accepted. My two best friends knew the real me and accepted that. I went back to dressing in nerdy t-shirts and no one cared. I was still somewhat on the outside though. I didn’t care about the same things as my friends so if there were certain things going on in their lives that they felt I wouldn’t care about, they just didn’t bring it up. I had no idea my best friend was promiscuous because she never talked about it with me.

College was more difficult than expected. I made lots of acquaintances but no real friends. I’m horrible at making friends. Femininity wasn’t really an issue in college or as an adult. The problem was my shyness coupled with my horrible social skills. Work was difficult because all I could get were jobs in retail and I’m not really a bubbly person.

What means the most to you in life?

Family. Achievement.

Do you think that being an INTJ influences your values? If so, how?

Surprisingly, no. It certainly influences my views on social customs and political issues, but not my values, unless you’re talking about what I value in people. I highly value competency, integrity, efficiency, and logic in people.

Do you view yourself as a strong person with goals and successes? How has this opinion changed over time?

I have always been very strongly goal-driven. I knew my career goals at the age of four and stuck with them until two years into college. Long story short, life and my own failings pulled the rug out from under me multiple times. Without a clear, confident goal in mind I’ve been adrift these past few years. I’m currently in reproductive mode so I have a few years to sort my shit out before the kids start going to school and I need to do something real with myself again.

How do you think your life would be different if you were a male?

I think it would have been easier in every respect except for dating, just because I can’t imagine having to ask someone out.

If you could educate men (or women) about what your life is like, what would you teach them or want them to understand?

Not everyone has a smiling, bubbly personality and that’s okay. It doesn’t mean we’re not good at things. My jobs have always been difficult because of this. Interviews are difficult because of this. Everyone expects a super-happy-smiley female in sharp clothes. That’s not me and it never will be. I would ask people to look past the exterior and the initial impressions.

How do you perceive yourself?

My identity and happiness are tied to my ability to achieve my goals, and that is severely lacking at the moment. I feel like if I don’t accomplish great things in my limited time on Earth then I have failed as a human being. No pressure. : /

I am suicidal
That much, I know, is true
I feel like my world is breaking
And I don’t have any glue

I used to be so hopeful
Loving everyday
Now I wish everyone
Would dissapear and go away

I came close to killing
Hurting myself I did
But something changed in my life
A simple miracle I do not kid

I used to be suicidal
All my tears could fill the sea
But then someone finally said
That they actually loved me

—  Lockedheartbreak

I’m the unholy trinity, basically.

I’m a furry

I like UNDERTALE

I watch MLP

But I try my best to not fall into the female fedorians category. Basically I just like my anthro character because she reminds me of a dog I used to have, Undertale is a cool game with cancer-base, and I just liked MLP since I was younger.

Annnnyways, this’ll spark contro a LOT. So, here’s a story I had.

I got a message one day from this guy at my workplace, and this message was sent to my tumblr, and I didn’t know it was that guy. We’ll call him ‘JK’ for Just Kidding since that was his ‘defense’. So, it’s basically “whats your name” “how are you” “what do you like”, the whole smalltalk thing.

I’m a bit confused since we all know that usually doesn’t happen on Tumblr, but I digress. So, as soon as I mention why my icon is a dog (with multi-colored eyes and odd hair) he goes “Wait, so you’re into dogs?”

I reply with “Uhm, kinda? I like dogs, but I don’t /like/ dogs.”

He says something along the lines of “lol well I wish I could watch” or something equally sexual and gross.

I’m in an open relationship, and have a girlfriend. This does NOT mean I’ll fuck any random person OR animal.

So, I say “Dude, that’s actually really gross.“ 

"Jk, jk, don’t be so serious.”

And we all know what a crap excuse that is, even if it’s true. So I tell him to please not say that stuff.

Soon we turn to the topic of past, and I say that I had a single boyfriend when I was a kid and the rest were girls.

“I think you should try more.”

“Excuse me?”

“JK lol”

Like, on Tumblr there’s three groups.

* Anti-SJW, Anti-Feminism, Egalitarian, Cis White Male Nightmare

* Polykin atheist demiromantic sapiosexual with BPD, MPD, and Schizo self dx (ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧

* shitposting extreme/the rarest pepe

I fall into the shitposting section, basically, but anyways, he was number one.

Normally I’m just like “k” to all sorts of homophobic/transphobic/etc. things geared towards me because bro I’m actually kinda chill

And this time, is when it got worse. First he asks me if I’m into fucking dogs, then asks if I’m 'a full lesbian’, then asks a bunch more sexual questions.

When I get to the Undertale and MLP topics, it’s more casual, no sex, no 'JK’s, nothing. Honestly I’m getting a 'Denko’ vibe from this dude except instead of (´・ω・`) it’s always “JK”.

And eventually, I say I’m in an open relationship.

He INSTANTLY asks me out, says 'romantic’ things (the typical “I know you’re gay, but I’m a nice guy” excuse) and I shoot him down point blank.

He’s been bugging me, asking for shit like “What’s your address?” (“Just to see your dogs lol”) so I’m freaked out, it’s been like a week since we started chatting.

He makes a callout post about me being a feminazi or something and throws a fit.

I stay up at night one night doing the 'random sleep shitpost thinking’ thing we all do sometimes, and boom. It hits me.

His user was something like 'JKkingdom’ or something with his name in it.

JK.

J K .

I go to work the next morning and drop hints.

“I rejected this totally creepy guy on Tumblr.”

“His username was something like JKkingdom.”

“He’s such a fucking creep.”

And next thing I know, he FLIPS. HIS. SHIT. 

He gets really pissed and basically butthurt.

I reply with a casual “Seriously?” and he just ends up shouting more.

I blocked him before going to bed, of course, and I don’t know what happened to his blog, but yeah.

I got my hours changed so I didn’t need to deal with him anymore.

holy shit that’s golden

i don’t even care that you’re a furry brony undertale fan you pull this sort of shit and you’re alright by me

C: I hate to admit it, but I hate the terminology “going natural”…like you’re not “going” anywhere, you’re literally deciding NOT to alter your hair’s innate curl pattern…really you’re “returning natural” if anything.

And like…my WHOLE LIFE my hair has been kinky curly 4b hair. I’ve always been “natural,” never got it permed. But I never thought of it that way (with those labels, I mean) before this “movement.” My hair was just my hair, and I liked it sometimes and I hated it sometimes. I never felt the need to “tame” it or whatever (wtf) but I didn’t care when other girls flattened their tresses, I thought that was pretty too. Like my mom taught me to wear my hair the way I liked it, and to let other people wear their hair the way they liked it?? And it was always that simple for me??

And I know not a lot of girls are raised to feel that way, and that it’s a real problem for so many of us. And that this “embracing our natural beauty revolution” means a lot to those who were always taught to HATE their curly hair; girls who are now done trying to live up to euro beauty standards, but god. I’m happy for them but I’m so tired of all this talk of “accepting messy hair” and “going natural” and “see look I’m a black girl that can grow long hair proving everybody wrong” and “embrace embrace embrace” like jfc. It’s HAIR. It’s not the fault of us black women, obviously, but I can’t STAND how much this matters to us. I mean hair and culture are often intertwined, and so of course hair is important. But still…like guys, we’re so much more than our hair?? Can we please remember that??

And kinky hair is really pretty, we all can see that, so…idk why we try so hard to prove it?? Like just look at it?? It’s gorgeous??? (Like, to me, complimenting my hair a bazillion times just makes me feel weird about it, like it’s something that actually isn’t pretty but we’re all trying to convince ourselves is. Idk. It feels patronizing to be honest. Maybe we’re trying to convince other people it is? Idk. Where did the idea that curly hair is ugly even come from ugh. I just wish we could all relax a little about the hair thing ugh. Pun not intended.)

ANYWAY. All of that being said, I am also really happy about this movement. Because I’m no longer the “only girl with puffy hair in the room”, getting pencil shavings and pens stuck in her afro by scrappy white kids at school. Everywhere I go, I see more and more black women showing off their nappy tresses and they all look so pretty. And tbqh I feel less alone in the world now. That sounds sappy but it’s true. Also it’s great being able to go onto the internet and learn hair-care tips that actually apply to me…idk. Those things make me happy but…jeez it really should have always been this way guys…

Like this movement is great in someways, but god. I wish we didn’t need a movement in the first place, know what I mean?? And I wish that we all just liked our hair from the get-go. Because it’s not just women, it’s men, and all the kinky-haired people in between. Like this hate for our curls and kinks is such a problem, and this movement is a great means of ending it…but I kinda wish it wasn’t a problem in the first place. And I really don’t think every aspect of this movement is that helpful at all. Some of it is just as damaging to our ego as the lies our race was told before. And I wish we didn’t need a revolution and that we could all stop patronizing kinky hair and just genuinely love it already. Like, love it to the point where we don’t feel the need to brag about it, because we’re already certain everyone automatically recognizes that a head full of healthy, nappy hair is attractive. Idek, man. I’m probably dumb for wanting a perfect world.

LA Times Q&A

Benedict Cumberbatch is chasing the sun. Fresh off an island vacation with fiancée Sophie Hunter and just out of a steam at the Parker Palm Spring’s sauna, Cumberbatch is moving his patio chair clockwise around a firepit on a chilly January afternoon. “There’s no shame today,” says Cumberbatch, clad in gray sweatpants and a vintage Pink Floyd T-shirt. “I’m going back to England, where it’s like the Arctic Circle. I need to store up the sun now, otherwise I’ll get rickets by the time I step off the plane.”

Cumberbatch has landed in Palm Springs along with the rest of the cast of “The Imitation Game” to accept an ensemble award at the Palm Springs International Film Festival. The movie, a look at the life of Alan Turing, the Cambridge genius who led the team that cracked the Enigma code that Nazi Germany used to encrypt its radio transmissions during World War II, premiered at the Toronto International Film Festival in September and recently won eight Oscar nominations, including nods for best picture and for Cumberbatch’s lead turn.

We moved right alongwith the 38-year-old actor as he shifted his chair to account for the dying light and spoke about his eventful journey between Toronto and Palm Springs.

You look a lot more relaxed than when I saw you last in Toronto.

It was a really steep incline toward Christmas, just crazy, finishing “Richard III” [which will be featured in the BBC’s “The Hollow Crown” series], getting ready for the holidays, moving around seeing different families. That was a big induction this Christmas. A whole new world opens up. And then we were able to just breathe, be in the present tense, be in one place, just relaxing and … [Cumberbatch leans forward and drops his voice to an excited whisper]. That’s Robert Duvall! Wow! [Duvall, also in Palm Springs for the festival, walks by on a path about 20 yards away.]

I’ve never met an actor who doesn’t idolize him. Have you ever met him?

He’s one of the masters. I haven’t met him. I’d love to.

Maybe tonight at the gala?

As a fanboy, yeah, to just touch the hem of the garment. But at the same time, to get a meaningful moment, you need to be away from the circus. That’s why I’ve enjoyed the acting roundtables I’ve done in this roar. You get to have a free-flowing conversation about acting stuff.

Have you learned anything from those conversations?

Well, you have that moment where you meet your heroes and, initially, they’re just something “other.” And then the common ground of what we do for a living erases that. The best thing about the job is that it breaks down class and age and sex and race and transcends those things. You’re never one person. You’re always part of a team.
That’s why I love this award we’re getting tonight. It’s a great excuse for us to get together and have a giggle. [Looking around the expansive grounds.]Put us in a place with a cricket pitch over there and a fire pit right here. Later tonight, we can get a bit feral. Maybe burn some notes like we did at the end of “The Imitation Game.”

Invite Robert Duvall to join you …

Absolutely. He will be right here, presiding over the proceedings, calmly steering things.

Just going by the way you photobombed U2 with that impressive leap at last year’s Oscars, you seem to enjoy these events.

The Oscars were really good fun. And, yes, I leapt and bound all over the place.

Which you blame on Ellen DeGeneres, right?

And vodka.

That seems to be a running thing with you when you do something silly …

I’m drunk. That’s not actually true. I wish I could blame the evils of alcohol and say, “Kids: Don’t go there.” But that … happens when I’m sober. It would have happened. And I say “drunk,” but I had a little slurp of a tiny miniature. It was just the high of the whole thing. A friend of mine did literally say, “Get a photo of U2 if you can.” Not with them. Just of them. And I thought, “I don’t have my camera phone and I’m not going to ask for a selfie with U2.”

You showed some impressive height on that leap.

White boy can jump.

U2 attended this event last year. Everyone ignored the movie stars and went straight for Bono.

Does rock star trump movie star? Well, unless they’re selling tickets for Hamlet faster than a Beyonce and Jay Z tour. [Cumberbatch’s upcoming, summer 12-week “Hamlet” run in London sold out instantly.] But, by and large, yes.
But I’m still thinking about what I learned in those roundtable conversations. The fundamental thing I learned was how many actors said there’s not a singular way of approaching the job, which is a relief to me. The first person who told me that was Meryl Streep. We were making “August: Osage County” and I said, “I hate to do this but it’s an opportunity to talk about your process. How do you start? You’ve got the depression, the alcoholism, the cancer, the grief, so many states. It’s so richly comic and deeply upsetting at the same time.” And she went [Cumberbatch does a dead-on Streep impersonation], “I don’t really have a singular approach. I wouldn’t be able to do half the things I’ve done if I had one way of working. Sometimes it’s outside in, sometimes it’s inside out.” And I thought, “Oh god. I adore her!”

What about practical advice for negotiating Hollywood? What’s the best you’ve heard?

“Always take Fountain.” Wasn’t it Bette Davis who said that? That’s come in handy many times. Because the traffic on Sunset … forget it.

That’s it?

I’ve been chugging away in my career 10 years. That helps you prepare for the exposure. And there are things now which make it easier to escape the obsession with self. If you have someone you love and you’re devoted to them and it’s a proper devotional love — as I do in my life — there’s nothing better than that tonic. First of all, you have your world between you and that person. But also, being devoted to that person takes you away from yourself. There’s someone more important. Not that that’s a reason to be in a relationship, but it’s a very healthy byproduct of it when you’re doing such an obsessional job as acting can be.

Paul Thomas Anderson recently said that having kids helps too. With them, you realize you’ve already done your best work, so it frees you to be a little looser with your day job.

I salute that principle 100 … no not more than 100%. I’m not Simon Cowell. [Cumberbatch breaks into a Cowell impersonation] “One hundred and fifty percent!” There’s no such thing. I get very nerdy every time he does that on “The X Factor.” He’s brilliant and I completely endorse every thing he does … except for the math part.

You once said your greatest regret was not being a dad by the age of 32. Why 32?

When I was growing up, I had a weird obsession with 32 being the mark of adulthood and that was part of what I thought that might mean, naively. It was just a hunch about a number. I was always a bit of an old soul. I wasn’t really interested in being young. I mean, I wasn’t eccentric.
But I’m glad it didn’t happen. Things happen for a reason. And I’m definitely with the right person for that. So no regrets … [Actor David Oyelowo, who plays Martin Luther King Jr. in “Selma,” approaches.] David! How are you? The back of your head is everywhere. As I was driving in last night, I kept seeing it all over the place.

Oyelowo: I’ve got one of the most famous backs of heads in history. But you … Richard III, Hamlet, Sherlock … are there three of you? You’re setting the bar too high. It’s hard keeping up with you.

Cumberbatch: What I fear, if the work gets diluted, people will go, “Well, he just took on too much.” But, to be honest, I just can’t turn down those opportunities.

Oyelowo: Somehow, I don’t think people are going to be saying, “He spread himself too thin.” [The two talk a bit more before Oyelowo takes his leave. I tell Cumberbatch, who hasn’t yet seen “Selma,” that some have said the movie isn’t fair to President Lyndon Johnson. “The Imitation Game” has also caught flak, with a few critics saying the movie should have shown Turing’s sexuality on screen.]

How do you balance legacy and storytelling in fact-based movies like yours and “Selma”?

You can’t do one without the other. The argument with ours, that you don’t see him being sexually active, upset me because we weren’t shy of it. I’m not interested in the vanity of a character or my own vanity as an actor. The idea that for a second I would want to do that or the film would do that is perverse.
The whole structure of the film is about showing a man who had a life that wasn’t allowed. So, what, you need to prove that he was gay by seeing him be with a man? Whether it was something we needed to see because it was very much a part of his life is another argument, but I would argue that in our paradigm, it just would have looked really stuck in for good measure; it would have looked distasteful.

There could be another movie made about that aspect of his life.

There are so many movies to be made of this story. We have only two hours. It packs quite a punch, our film. At one moment, it’s war-espionage thriller, the next moment a tragic story of a man wronged by an intolerant society, the next moment a celebration of someone who’s different.
Everyone has a version of the story they want to see and I completely respect that. And, obviously, they are going to have to respect me being defensive about it because I’m in the thick of it, trying to be fair and uncompromising in my portrayal of this great man.