i wish i was everything my mom wanted

instagram

jacksonwang852g7: Today is my birthday and I’m glad.
Not just because it’s my birthday, but a special day with special people. They are my parents and every single one of you.
It’s been a long time since the last time me and my family spending birthday together. No matter if it’s my parents birthday or mine, we were always not together. I’m really grateful that we could finally spend my 23rd birthday together this time. Mom and Dad, thank you for giving me this precious life 23 years ago, and thank you for raising me up. And And now, all I want is mom and dad, taking a break from everything, do whatever you guys want, whenever. That’s my biggest wish. Love.

My birds, thank you for all the birthday wishes, birthday events, I saw everything and I appreciate everything ! I’m going to take good care of myself. at the same time, work hard to continue surprising you guys. Thank you so much, LOVE.
And thank you so much for all my friends, Who sent me birthday wishes even though you guys are really busy. Thank you so much.

I always wanted a brother or a sister. My mom gave me so much love and was my best friend, but I wish I had a sibling. My cousins were also like my brothers, but I think it’s still different when you have a brother or sister. I guess I will never know how it feels but that’s why I, God willing, want to have a lot of kids. I also feel like when you are an only child you don’t know how to share that much. Even though my parents taught me how to work hard for what I want and never just gave me everything, I feel like I need to know how to share a little bit more.

i’m so tired but i can’t sleep because whenever i sleep i dream of you and i’m so tired of waking up crying.

the littlest things remind me of you, things i never expect to, and i break down in the middle of conversations with your name on my lips.

i wish you would say something - anything - to me, i’m desperate to know how you’re doing and if you’re okay, how your mom is and if your dog got any new toys.. or you could tell me to fuck off, tell me you hate me, and i would take if because this silence between us is killing me.

have you blocked my number or are you just ignoring me?

it hurts i don’t know how to make it stop hurting i can’t breathe i wanna die everything hurts so bad please help me if hurts

i just want to come home.

please let me come home.
—  texts i’ll never send
(cc, 2017)
Welcome Home, Sweetheart

Originally posted by thing-you-do-with-that-thing

Pairing: Jensen x daughter!Reader
Word count: 1,150

Part 5 of Letters From the Dead

Y/N started school today. I think I was more emotional than her. She was so determined to do this all on her own, and then she looked up at me. Maybe she saw that I needed it, but she took my hand and let me walk her in.

Now it really hits how big she’s getting.


The next morning after breakfast, Jensen declared it was a father/daughter bonding day. You’d stared at him like he’d grown a third eye. That just wasn’t something you were used to. JJ told you that it was fun, and to ask for ice cream. That wasn’t a bad idea, either.

Your first stop was to get you some stuff to make your room feel a bit more like home. Walking in, you’d been looking down, so you didn’t even know the name of the damn store. He was pushing the cart, and you were walking next to him. “So, uh, what’s your favorite color?” He asked awkwardly.

“Y/F/C.” You shrugged. “You know, we could have ordered this online, and saved you having to come shopping with a teenager.”

Jensen laughed, shaking his head. “Dan did offer to do this part, actually.” He glanced at you before turning down the aisle of sheets. “Told her I had 14 years to make up for. Gotta start somewhere.” His voice was somewhat sad. “Hey, where did you think I was all this time?” He asked you once you’d started looking over the different colors.

Pausing, you shrugged and glanced at him. “I didn’t.” You told him honestly, your eyes going back to the middle row. You were debating between two colors, and scrunching your face. “I never knew anything but it being mom and me for a long time. I asked her once, when I was really little. There was a daddy daughter dance thing. I went with my best friend and her dad. After that, I didn’t need to know. I was happy.”

He nodded. “Well, I’m glad you weren’t torn up or something about it.”

“This!” You smiled, grabbing some sheets. Looking over at him, you weren’t sure how he meant that. “Was that…sarcasm?” You asked, putting the package in the basket.

“No! No. Promise.” He chuckled. “I feel bad enough as it is, I’d feel worse if you spent your life thinking I’d like…abandoned you or something.” That made sense to you.

As you started moving towards the bedding sets, you finally blurted out the question you had been wanting to ask. “Why weren’t you there?” You asked gently, not looking at him.

Jensen stopped. “She never told you?” You looked up at him and shook your head. “We broke up so I could focus on my career. I still cared about her, and wanted to stay friends. Suddenly, she stopped returning my calls.” He sighed. “In the letters that your mom wrote, that the lawyer gave me, she said she wanted me to live my dream. That she knew I’d go back and do the right thing. I’d be there for you guys, and she wanted me to better my life for whoever I made a life with.” Your eyes fell, feeling like you’d invaded on that life. “She’s right, though.” He told you. “I would have gone right back.” You couldn’t tell if he wished he had known or not.

Keep reading

Creepypasta #1103: I Had A Friend Who Lived In The Air Vents

Length: Super long

When you’re a little kid, you do some strange stuff to get attention. Especially when you’re an only child and then poof, you’re not. You’re getting the “little brother or sister” pep talk from Mom and Dad and everything changes. You’re used to being the center of their world, being told you’re the most special little girl, but as Mom’s belly gets bigger and bigger and Dad’s patience with you gets smaller and smaller you realize it’s not going to go back the way it was. Not ever.

That’s what happened to me when I was seven, anyway. I was the kind of kid that needs a lot of attention. I hadn’t had to try hard for seven years, I’d been coasting on my parents’ single-minded doting. But pretty soon I noticed some small differences; they were less interested in what I’d done in school that day, more interested in getting ready for my new little brother or sister.

I was like an alcoholic without a bottle. You feel fine at first but soon the tremors set in and you realize you just needit, you know? You need their eyes on you, loving you, reminding you that you’re the most special little girl in the whole wide world, maybe the only special little girl.

So in the last month or so before the baby came, I got creative.

“I made a new friend!” I told them one night at dinner.

“At school, sweetheart?” Mom asked.

“No!” I was fidgety, excited, twitching in my seat when they both looked at me with rapt attention from across the table. Time to launch my plan into action. “He lives in the air vents! His name is Marty and he’s MAGIC.”

“Oh,” said my Dad, and he smiled a little. “That’s fun. Eat your peas, Rosie.”

And that was it. That was IT! I’d just told them that Magic Marty lived in our air vents and all I got was ‘that’s fun?’ And what’s worse, they went back to talking about the BABY — I always heard that word with an ominous sort of importance — and whether they thought the nursery could be painted over the weekend or not.

I stewed and pushed peas around my plate. I knew I was going to think of something better. Something to make them ask me questions about Marty, about me, like they used to.

Stupid BABY. I didn’t care if it was a brother or a sister. It was a pain before it even got here.

Over time, I came up with new tidbits about Magic Marty and how amazing he was. He only ate jellybeans! He could move things with his mind! He had a cat named Baseball and he was my VERY best friend!

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

BTS song reaction to "Outlaws of Love" by Adam Lambert.

I love this song :’) the meaning behind it gets to me. It’s about not being accepted for being gay (that’s how I interpret it anyway). I will make this reaction BTS ships. It will have repeated names since I ship a few of them with more than one person lmao. I’m just doing my favorite ships so if there’s a ship I didn’t do that you want me to do, please request~

BTS: Reaction to being unaccepted

♥Jin x Namjoon: Another unfair night. He never seemed to live the perfect life he imagined since he came out to his parents. He was so happy with Namjoon and he was hoping his parents would be too. 

He sat in his room that he shared with his boyfriend, thinking of everything that made his life a living hell. And it all started with loving Namjoon; that was the most painful part. He was so helplessly in love and he wouldn’t give that up for the world. 

“Hey baby what’s wrong?” Namjoon spoke gently while sitting on the chair next to Jin’s. He rested his elbow on the table and look at his beautiful boyfriends face. 

“I just… I wish my mom would stop calling me to tell me how disappointed she was in me. I want her to leave me alone…”  Jin spoke while looking up at the ceiling to fight his tears. That’s when Namjoon wrapped his arms around his waist and kissed his forehead gently. 

“She misses you. But she isn’t worth crying over baby.” Namjoon said with a sensitive smile. “Come, let’s cuddle.”

Originally posted by yoongi-path

♥Yoongi x Hoseok: Hobi was conflicted. How could he be so disappointing to his own sister? The one he looked up to most in life? As he sat there and thought about everything, he felt a sudden weight pressing against his back. The weight was something that made his heart flutter but it wasn’t enough to make him smile now.

“Are you ok..?” Yoongi asked in a rough voice, resting his head against the back of his neck, and trailed his fingers up and down Hoseok’s arms.

“I’m alright…” Hobi spoke in monotone. A few seconds of silence went by before Yoongi softly sighed and tapped his fingers on the younger’s shoulder.

“I want you to talk to me. You know I’m ready to listen to you anytime…” He turned Hobi aground to face him, and pulled him into a tight, heartwarming hug. “Because I… I love you…” His confession was the key to Hoseok’s smile. 

Light chuckles erupted from the younger’s throat and it made Yoongi get all flustered. “I love you too Yoongi.”

Originally posted by pastelyoonseok

♥Yoongi x Jimin: Jimin was a soft squishy bean that was very shy when it came to his relationships. He wasn’t necessarily accepted within his family so that was really hard for him, especially since he wanted to get married and have them all be there.

Today when Jimin and Yoongi were out in public, grocery shopping, they were holding hands. It was all fine until people started to give strange looks. Even the cashier got a little overly rude. 

“You shouldn’t be so open about it.” She said. Yoongi just pulled Jimin into a very tight hug and glared at the woman.

“At least I’m not a grumpy old cashier now do your damn job.”

Originally posted by jimiyoong

♥Hoseok x Jimin: Cute selfies together were their thing. Everyday they would take at least 20 new pictures together. Funny faces, serious faces, adorable faces, and even pictures of them kissing and making out. 

Today was just another one of those lazy days that the boys craved. They loved having alone time. While they were taking pictures, Jimin’s phone rang. It was a text from him mother whom abandoned him when he came out of the closet. He licked his lips and set his phone down, but Hobi gave him no time to negatively react.

“Jiminie look at me, kiss, kiss.” He puckered his lips and poked the younger’s sides to get him to laugh.

Originally posted by jihopedesu

♥Jimin x Taehyung: In public they weren’t the most affectionate couple. Mostly because Jimin got shy with stuff like that, especially since it wasn’t very sociably acceptable. Taehyung didn’t mind of course, but at the same time he just wanted to show his world off to the outside. He wasn’t to show off his perfect boyfriend, and the reason why he kept smiling.

So one day in public Taehyung got ballsy. “Chimchim.” He spoke while giving a suggestive look to his boyfriend that was picking out bananas.

“Yeah?” Jimin looked at his taller boyfriend with big eyes that made Taehyung weak.

“I dare you to kiss my cheek. Right now.” Tae said loudly. Jimin got all tense and looked around quickly.

“Tae, n-not now.”

“Fine, then we’re not cuddling tonight.” Taehyung shrugged while looking at the watermelon. Jimin contemplated in his head and sighed heavily before growing the balls and kissing him on the cheek in front of everyone.

Originally posted by jxnhyungs

♥Jimin x Jungkook: Jikook was the type off couple to wear clothes that compliment each other. Jimin would wear black while Jungkook wore white. They’d argue with each other about who looked sexier. 

“It’s me.” Jimin said as if it was the most obvious thing.

“What? I mean, have you seen me??” He purposefully asked a woman who seemed to be extremely homophobic-just to piss Jimin off-a question. “Miss, who looks better? Me or my dumb boyfriend who thinks he’s better than me because he was born in Busan first?”

Jungkook was very open about the relationship. He was super proud, and slowly that started to rub off on Jimin.

Originally posted by jimiyoong

♥ Taehyung x Jungkook: This couple was the openly gay couple. Gay festivals, gay parades, count them in! They were very proud to have each other, considering that’s all they had. Their parents disowned them because they made the “wrong” choice. So Vkook took this as a positive thing. Now it was just them against the world, and they knew they could easily win.

Taehyung was one to get openly mad when someone judged. When a lady made a rude comment about them in a grocery store, he grabbed the nearest item and used it as a microphone.

“Do you see this? This guy is mine. Mine!” Taehyung said loudly into the stuffed giraffe. Jungkook would just look at him like he’s crazy, but he’d end up laughing and kiss his cheek when he was finished with his rant. 

Originally posted by smol-jims

Shamless Imagines 4-I wish you weren't a lesbian.(Best friends-Lip)

Pairing: You and Lip as best friends

Description: You and lip had been best friends since 13, You are now both 19 and living together, he had found out a few weeks ago that his girlfriend had been cheating on him and thats when you start to comfort him.

Requested: Yes: Lips best mate + a lesbian

Words: 400

Originally posted by heavenatniiight


You and lip cuddling was something that happened often, when a girl broke your heart or you had a bad dream or he thinks about drinking or Monica comes back or anything really. Your arms were open for one another at anytime.

You had never felt anger flash through you so fast until last week when Lip had come home with glossy eyes and tear stained cheeks. “She cheated, the whole time” He whispered to you after he had taken off his winter jacket. It didn’t take you long before wrapping your arms around him.

Thats what lead you to this moment now, you and lip were laying on the bed in your room that lets be honest most of the time you two shared as you had a huge fear of sleeping alone, his head on your boobs while laying on his stomach, one of your hands with a joint in it and the other wrapped around him as you watched American dad.

“Fuck I wish you weren’t a lesbian”He said randomly causing you to laugh.

“Careful Lippy, starting to sound just like my father when I told him I was gay” You say, causing a loud chuckle to come from the boy laying on you.

“No I mean, If you weren’t into girls then maybe I wouldn’t be hurt all the time by assholes who lie to me and Id just have you, Ya know? Like maybe if you weren’t a pussy licker we would be a thing”

“Ive thought about that a lot too, and sometimes I wish I wasn’t so I could protect you from all these whores who seem to hurt you, but I’m extremely happy with this.” You paused,

“You are like the husband my dad wants me to have, the brother Ive always wanted, the best friend Ive never had before you, My mom when I need her since she passed, my everything all wrapped up in a semi broken bow” You added causing him to smile.

“Yeah I wouldn’t want to change this either, this friendship is the best thing thats ever happened to me” Lip said turning back to the tv.

You smiled and started putting your hand through his hair, This was all you needed. Girls will come and go for the both of you but this friendship was going to last and both of you knew that.                    

shesthemuscle  asked:

“please don’t leave me alone.” + Tony Stark/James "Bucky" Barnes

Infinity War!AU


Bucky blinks tiredly at the fading sun. His entire form aches from heavy lifting, from being thrown through a wall or three, from being hit by a couple of ray beams, and whatever else he and the others faced in the last three days. He wants to call it a day and sleep for ten years.

He’s sitting on the ground, back leaning against a half crumbled wall, waiting for someone to find him. He lost his ear comm halfway into the final battle when he was blasted from a rooftop by some sort of droid. 

Sometime after that, he gets separated from the others. Bucky knows for a fact that Steve is freaking out about him right now. His gut is telling him so. He wonders if the others - Natasha and Sam, particularly - are worried about him?

A sort of heaviness settles on his shoulders. 

The fight was tense but not nearly as intense as it was to be in the same room as Steve and Stark as they both tried to maintain some sort of civility while discussing Thanos, the invasion, and the possibility of dying. Stark occasionally has a smug look on his face that didn’t help improve anyone’s mood, but Bucky doesn’t care. From what he was told in passing, Stark foreshadowed something like this happening a while back. 

And Stark barely glanced his way since he and Steve called a shaky truce. Bucky knows it has something to do with being in King T’Challa’s palace. Stark is smart enough - Steve has enough common sense - to not do anything that would anger the king (like breaking a meeting room or destroying personal property). 

And so they are civil and Stark keeps them all at a distance. Even Romanoff and Bucky thought they were friends. He has no idea what’s up with Barton and Stark, but the hostility is nearly as bad with them as it is with Steve and Stark at times. And the Maximoff girl? Bucky doesn’t know where to begin with her. She and Stark don’t speak to each other. Don’t even look at each other. Everyone else just stays out of the way.

Bucky groans when he shifts his arm, the metallic one, and feels something pull within. It stings like a motherfucker. He hopes, prays even, that someone will find him soon so he can get his arm looked at and quite possibly sleep for a whole decade. 

He hears something in the distance. Something flying? Maybe? Not giving much thought to it, Bucky closes his eyes and breathes deeply. 

And then something heavy lands in front of him and something that sounds suspiciously familiar follows. Like a mechanical door sliding open and then closing. There are footsteps and then someone is crouching in front of him.

“Barnes, you alive?”

Jesus, Mary, and Joesph!

Bucky’s eyes pop open and he’s sitting up ramrod straight staring into the dark brown eyes of Tony fucking Stark

“Calm down,” Stark says followed by an eye roll. “I’m not going to hurt you.”

Bucky doesn’t reply. Realistically speaking, there has been no mention of what happened in Siberia and both Steve and Stark actively avoid discussing what went down. And he, himself, went back into the ice willingly for nearly a year before the Thanos threat became too big.

He’s in no position to be making any means of escape or to defend himself and, judging by the Iron Man suit standing at the ready, all Stark had to do is give the order and he’s done for. 

“Jesus Christ, Barnes. Relax!” Stark snaps.

Bucky didn’t realize he was close to panicking, didn’t realize that his heart started beating fast, that his hands were shaking. 

“You ain’t gonna’ kill me?” Bucky manages.

Stark stares at him with blank eyes. No anger. No remorse. There’s something, maybe pity?, in his eyes and Bucky hates it.

“If I wanted you dead, you’d be dead.” It’s the only thing he gets. “Now sit still so I can look you over.”

Bucky doesn’t bother concealing the flinch when Stark’s fingers start probing along the right side of his temple up to his hairline and then to his neck. He mumbles to himself under his breath but doesn’t move Bucky beyond shifting his metal arm somewhat to check his ribs.

When his down, Stark deliberate gets up slowly and backs away much like one would do to someone who is frightened. If heaviness weren’t settling over his eyes, Bucky might have laughed.  

“Okay, I’m gonna’ go get Rogers and, uh, a medic team. Just sit tight.”

Panic floods Bucky’s mind and he shakes his head. 

“Don’t leave,” he demands. “Don’t leave me here.”

Stark just looks at him, face blank. And the panic that he felt quickly doubles. He doesn’t want to be left alone. Who knows how long it would take for Stark to being Steve or whoever else along? He didn’t want to risk falling unconscious or something worse. 

“I’m not medically trained to help you, Barnes. Nor do I have the supplies to help.” 

“Don’t care,” Bucky replies, feeling his grasp on reality starting to slip. “Just - fuck - just,” he curses when he moves his arm and jolt of pain shoots across his shoulders, “please don’t leave me alone.”

His head drops. It sounds pathetic even to his own ears. Begging someone who clearly doesn’t want to stay. 

If only Steve were - “Okay.”

Bucky’s head snaps up. Did he hear that correctly? Did Stark actually agree to stay with him until help arrives? 

Stark turns to his suit - “FRIDAY, activate protocol 134452″ - and crouches to Bucky’s level as the suit takes off to the sky, probably looking for Steve and the others.

“I know you d-don’t want to stay -,” Bucky begins.

“Just stop talking.”

“ - but thank you, Stark.” He finishes as though Stark didn’t speak.

They sit there in silence for minutes. Bucky is trying - and failing - to not fall asleep and Stark hasn’t moved from his crouched position. It can’t be comfortable, but Bucky isn’t stupid enough to test his luck and ask Stark to take a seat.

He is, however, apparently stupid enough to say something else.

“About that time i-in Siberia…” Bucky coughs. “Nothing can change what I did - “

“Barnes, you really need to stop talking.” It’s a warning, but Bucky knows if he doesn’t get it out now, the chances of them being alone like without outside influence are slim to none. 

“Just let m-me finish, please?” Stark doesn’t reply so Bucky takes that as a sign to continue. “I can’t change what I did, but I n-need you to know that I’ll spend the rest of m-my life wishing I could take it back.” 

Stark sucks in a shaky breath. “You had no control over your actions.”

“Doesn’t matter.”

“For fuck’s sake, Barnes!!” Stark snaps. “I know it doesn’t matter to you despite you having no control!” 

Bucky closes his eyes.

“And…” Stark starts again, much calmer, “it didn’t matter to me at the time when I saw the fucking video. But now,” he licks his lips. “It’s not fair to hold it over your head for the rest of your life. I just,” Stark looks pained for a moment. “I just wish I could have said good-bye to my mom. Dad? It’s been rocky for years. But mom? She was…everything to me.”

The telltale signs of tears sting the backs of Bucky’s eyes. Stark looks close to crying himself.

“Stark -,” Bucky wants to say something. 

God, the situation is fucked.

“My mom wouldn’t want me to hold it against you and after some time of being away from everything to do with Siberia and The Accords…I’m much more clear-headed.” He hesitates. “Steve won’t like it, but I want to help you. My mom may have lost her life, but I can help you get your’s back.”

“Why would you want to help me?”

“Consider it an IOU,” Stark replies simply. 

Bucky nods. “Okay.”

It’s going to be a rocky future and Bucky knows that he and Stark have more to discuss, but this is a start. 

Probs wasn’t what you expected…

Still, I hope you liked it. :)

Chuck & Ocean

This was requested by @emilyymichelle! I hope you all enjoy this!! <3 <3

Word Count: 413

Warnings: fluff

Originally posted by corteasolo

Castiel took you to the place you knew Chuck would be.  He was surprised you knew his father so well.  He wished he had your knowledge, otherwise he probably would have found him sooner.

“Thanks Cas,” you smiled.  “I’ll be fine from here.  Don’t worry I’ll get him to come back.”  

Castiel nodded, a small smile on his lips.  “Thank you [Y/N],” the angel spoke softly.  He turned around, leaving with a flutter of his wings.

You padded onto the beach, the wind blowing your hair softly to the side.  Once you approached Chuck, you wound your arms around his left arm.  “Your sons are trying to get along you know,” you noted softly.  “They just want their dad to be there for them.  They all miss you.”

Keep reading

Forever an immigrant

In 1996, my dad was assigned to go work overseas at Samsung’s new semiconductor chip manufacturing plant in Austin, Texas. Initially, he was hesitant to go. It would mean uprooting his entire life, and plus he didn’t want his children growing up losing sight of their Korean heritage. But they sent him anyway, and thus began our family’s strange, but exciting new life in America, born out of my dad’s enormous sacrifice.

There were language barrier issues and little culture shock mishaps since the beginning, sure. Since the first grade, I remember starting off every new school year with a plea to not to embarrass myself by messing anything up with my English, to not give away the fact that I was different in any way from my classmates. But my dad’s fears came true as I gradually became more comfortable speaking English to my friends than speaking Korean at home. I knew the conversion became complete as soon as I started dreaming and thinking in English. It made my school life easier for me at the time, but looking back on it now, I wish I hadn’t been so quick to try to assimilate.

My mom and dad moved back to Korea when I left for college, their parental duties having been fulfilled by giving their kids that “coveted” American education. That’s why it came as such a shock to me when they casually dropped a bombshell — after 20 years of forming my life and identity in the US, they wanted me to come back to Korea after graduation. To them, it was expected that their kids would learn everything they could from America, then return to Korea and make use of what they’d learned.

I fought, cried, and argued with them for months. I was finally ready to enter the world I had worked so hard to be accepted by, and this felt like wiping out right before the finish line. Then, three months before graduation, my dad had a stroke and the decision was made for me. I finished school early and decided to forego the graduation ceremony because I knew what I had to do — I would be going back to live with my parents, at least until my dad got better and I gained some sort of idea about what I wanted to do with my life. We made an informal deal that I would stick it out for three years, and give my birthplace a chance. And like a dutiful daughter, I did what they asked me to, working and living for three years in a country that was now as foreign as America first was to me in 1996.

People in Korea often ask gyopos (Korean-Americans), “Which do you like better, Korea or America?” They look at me expectantly, jealousy in their eyes for my fluent English and American citizenship. I don’t know what answer they’re looking for. I usually laugh and give my stock response, one I’ve picked up from hearing so many times: “Korea is the most fun Hell, but America is the most boring Heaven.” It’s a desperate, vague attempt to appease both of my identities. Looking back on my words now, I’m ashamed. How did I live my life thinking this, so blissfully unaware? After the events of last night, I can no longer think of America as the heaven I once thought it was.

Three lonely but eye-opening years passed. I experienced the beautiful and ugly sides of Korea, traveled to nearby countries in Asia, and saw how privileged I was to be able to live this dual life. After I finally saved up enough money to move back on my own and secured a job in America, I made the leap. For the most part, repatriation has been a smooth transition, but I’m consumed by guilt and dread for the future when I think about the aging parents I left behind in Korea. Though they gave their reluctant blessing to let me have the life and career I’ve longed to have in America, their worries are ever-looming in the back of my mind. I want to prove to them that they made the right decision, but every day is a struggle to convince my parents that I am okay here, that I’m safe in a country 7,000 miles away from them. And now in the wake of Trump’s victory, the implications that a deeply racist nation elected him make it harder for me to justify my living here to them.

The past few years for me have been the most accelerated crash-course in learning what it means to be Korean-American, and last night felt like a “fuck you” to everyone who looks like me. An Asian immigrant, and a woman at that. It feels like the failed culmination of a 20-year struggle to fit in, of yearning to look like my white classmates, for someone to look at me and not think I’m completely out of place. I’m most afraid of people who I thought were my friends, but stayed silent and walked into the voting booth yesterday to cast a ballot for Trump. I knew America feared us, but this just confirmed it. It feels like a punch to the gut because it proves that my parents were right.

I’m lucky to have spent most of my formative years in California and to be currently living in the diversity of New York, but yesterday, my paranoia that the people around me don’t see me as part of their white America was confirmed. Even though my job has allowed me to surround myself with like-minded people, ultimately my carefully curated social media feed has allowed me to live this last election cycle in a bubble. But now that bubble has popped, and today feels like when the lights turn on at the club and you realize you’d been dancing with a dirty mop.

The most disturbing part about a Trump presidency is the fact that half the people who came out to vote agreed with a sexist, racist maniac — and half of all Americans stayed home and watched him get elected. And these people aren’t so visibly different from you, or me. Even the Hillary supporters right now, the ones who are looking for ways out by threatening to leave to Canada, are part of the problem. Now more than ever, we need white allies to step up and show their support for millions of Muslim, Black, Latino, Asian, and LGBTQ+ Americans who have always been — even more so today — living in fear. Something is incredibly broken when the immediate response to a new president-elect is “I’m scared.”

For the rest of us POCs, we have to keep living our lives and create art and make ourselves heard, because we can’t keep waiting around for America to do it for us. We’re a nation of immigrants and minorities, and we’re going to keep creating and building things that are going to be better than a fucking wall.

Okay, okay, so I’ve seen a bit of the Karamel relationship for myself now, and I definitely like what I’m seeing.  Love the whole “star-crossed lovers” trope they’re doing.  Two kids from rival planets falling in love is classic.  Mon-el learning Earth culture is also quite possibly one of the greatest things ever (he called Kara’s mom a babe, oh my god).  I feel like him adjusting to Earth is going to end up being everything I ever wanted to see with Hook adjusting to Storybrooke on OUAT.  I seriously wish we had more scenes where he was trying to figure out modern technology.  That would have been awesome, but I’ll definitely take all I can get with Mon-el.  Oh, and we also have Mon-el already being snarky and somewhat flirty with Kara, and sometimes you can tell she’s feeling it, but then she’s like “oh, shit, no.”  Definitely giving me the CS feels on that front.  This is just what I’ve gotten from their first interactions, so stay tuned for more.

Felicity’s Birthday!

(photo credit: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/300826450083137465/)

This is story about Felicity’s Birthday for @miriam1779 on her birthday!! It is set early in Season 2. I hope it is fluffy enough for you Miriam and I hope you have a super fantastic birthday! Also available on AO3.



Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep! The shrill alarm clock just kept getting louder. Felicity quickly smacked the alarm clock and just as soon as soon as there was wonderful silence, her phone started to buzz.


She opened one eye and glanced at what she knew would be an ungodly hour before wondering who on earth could be calling. She had just left Oliver and Digg three hours ago and everything was fine.


She reached for her glasses and the phone at the same time, accidentally knocking her Saga graphic novel on the floor. As she put her glasses on she saw her mother’s face on her cell phone screen, she quickly slide the button over to answer.


“Mom? Is everything okay? It’s really early here in Starling City.”


“I’m sorry for waking you Baby Girl but I just wanted to be the first person to wish you a Happy Birthday!!”

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

I feel that disabled diviners like me and many others in the community get the shitty end of the stick when it comes to business. We have to work twice as hard to get even half the popularity or customers of big names like intuitive-rose. (no shade i love her). And yeah I know all people have problems but let's be fucking honest here disabled people are not treated the same and face far more issues than an able-bodied and able-minded person. (1/2)

It’s so hard because I can’t work due to my disability and there are so many barriers and obstacles to getting a disability benefit or something, which I don’t even want because I’d feel like a useless leech. My tarot readings and stuff are my only income, which is maybe one order a month if I’m lucky. I feel like a loser because I have to live with my mom. I’ve tried everything. I feel so hopeless. I honestly just want to give up but I don’t have it in me to. I wish I wasn’t so fucked up.(2/2)            

Confess

Overdue for a little chat..
I can’t believe I’ve been away from home for nearly three months now. I don’t miss much about being home other than my dogs and being able to lay on the couch with my sister and talk the morning away. I wish my mom answered my messages more frequently.. I’ve gotten to call her twice in the past three months. I wish I was better at explaining how content I’ve been feeling lately. I wish I wasn’t so lost in knowing what will happen next and how I will get there.. Or maybe I don’t.
I’m getting a better idea of who I am. I want to give away everything I can’t fit in my suitcase, I want to live far from any big city, and I want to be a little more wild in my every day life. In a way, I never want to stop traveling, but what lies ahead is pretty exciting. Xx

4

jacksonwang852g7: Today is my birthday and I’m glad. Not just because it’s my birthday, but a special day with special people. They are my parents and every single one of you. It’s been along time since the last time me and my family spending birthday together. no matter if it’s my parents birthday or mine, we were always not together. I’m really grateful that we could finally spend my 23 rd birthday together this time. Mom and dad, thank you for giving me this precious life 23 years ago, and thank you for raising me up. And And now, all I want is mom and dad, taking a break from everything, do whatever you guys want, whenever. That’s my biggest wish. Love. My birds, thank you for all the birthday wishes, birthday events, I saw everything and I appreciate everything ! I’m going to take good care of myself. at the same time, work hard to continue surprising you guys. Thank you so much, LOVE. And thank you so much for all my friends, Who sent me birthday wishes even though you guys are really busy. Thank you so much #jacksonwang #잭슨 #王嘉爾 #23rdbirthday #thankyoumom&dad #thankyou #healthybodyandmind #미안해요자리없어서두개로나눠서올렸어요 #對不起沒有位子所以發了兩個 #sorrytherewerentanyspacesoiuploadedtwoinstead #새들항상고마워요 #슨이더잘할게 #슨이안아플게

anonymous asked:

I love the punk scene and wish I were more involved. But like, I cant dye my hair because of my job and Im broke af to buy clothes I want. And Im afraid Ill look stupid. And Im always like the "mom friend", cause Im too afraid of everything cause I dont wanna get in trouble. My bf says punk is dead. But like I ignore him. Im just kinda stuck. Idk where to start ya know.

Eyy. I know it seems hard to start with no money but actually, punk started that way. It started among the broke ass people who DYIed everythig with the materials they found around.
I make my patches with acrylics i use for painting. My chain was a dog leash before. Paint over your shirts. Rip some shit up, sew some shit up…

And dont worry what others think, if they dont like it fuck em, who cares, you are the most important person, if you like it it is great.

It is okay, you can do it, you are punk as hell!

~ mod Petar

This is a rant but, like, you know. It would be nice if you read, if, like. You have patience and time? idk lmao

 (adm: Hey guys!! Some things are kind of getting out of control, and honestly I don’t even know where to start, but…! I’m putting this under a cut because it’s so long lmao [I APOLOGIZE IN ADVANCE]

Keep reading

10

Mikko Espresso & Boutique

Location:  403 Rue Main, Hudson

Metro Station: forget about the metro… this place is in Hudson!

Woah, I included a huge strip of photos for this post. But it’s worth it because this place was gorgeous.. and I didn’t drive 45 minutes to only take a few pictures. 

So I heard about Mikko through an Instagrammer who had been here once and loved it. I guess that’s a good enough reason to go all the way to Hudson for a coffee shop?

My mom woke up this morning and told me she didn’t have work and basically asked me if I wanted to cafe crawl with her. Anywhere.

Anywhere, mom? Fine by me! Since she was down to drive anywhere, I gave her the address of the furthest coffee shop on my list. And we commenced our adventure. 

The drive there was b-e-a-u-t-i-f-u-l in the winter. There was fresh snow everywhere and the trees were all covered in crystals. The snow hadn’t turned into slush yet and they were still holding on to the landscape, making the scenery a real winter wonderland. 

Finding the coffee shop, I realized it was a house. An actual house with 2 floors and everything. The door was so beautifully decorated. Walking in, the blue toned winter wonderland we had witness dissipated from our eyes and all we could feel was the warmth of the cafe. I was surprised by its little town cafe charm. 

The barista immediately greeted us in what I would think was the old living room of the house. They had a counter now though, of course. My mom started telling her that I was a cafe crawler and did the typical “I’m a proud mom” speech. It was a bit embarrassing, but it’s not like I’ll be seeing the people of Hudson any time soon. I let her talk about my not-so-famous blog and Instagram account. 

The cafe had 3 tables and a little bar. I have to admit - there wasn’t a lot of seating, but Hudson isn’t really big so I’m sure they don’t get that packed anyways. Luckily we found a table next to this young couple who were buying a little hat for their newborn baby.

Let me explain… Mikko isn’t only a coffee shop, but it’s also a boutique where you can buy cute decorations, kitchen items and other adorable little items. Their products were everywhere in the shop, and it added a unique personal touch to the entire place. I loved it. Their stuff wasn’t too expensive either (my mom bought a reindeer tea infused - she couldn’t resist). 

The mochas we ordered then came to our table. After snapping about a hundred pictures, I took the first sip. So good! It was rich and creamy and everything you want in a drink. I wish I had ordered one of their croissants too, but maybe I’ll get some next time when I’m in town. 

I’m very glad I got to experience a spontaneous cafe crawl outside of Montreal before the end of the holidays.. I recommend it to anyone who’s down for something a little bit different.

anonymous asked:

Hello ! I want to request a prompt : Sana’s mother realize the boy her daughter like is Yousef. Thank you :)

Sana had just come home from school. Her day hadn’t been really good. To be honest, since Friday, none of her days were really good. Her mind was always wandering elsewhere, and when it wasn’t, she always seemed to witness or hear something offending, assumptions about her or looks she didn’t want to notice. Today, even her two hours of biology had been horrid. She was stressed out. Isak looked at her expectantly, probably waiting for some kind of answer to his quiet questions about Mikael. The thing was, she didn’t want to think about Mikael, because then she thought of Even, whom she didn’t want to betray. She wanted him to take his time, to take the decision of telling Isak about what had happened his own way. And then she thought of Yousef. Yousef… That’s where her mind wandered all day everyday. It was exhausting. Thinking about him, about her relation to Allah, about the aspects of her faith and his… Thinking about how she felt when she was around him, about his smile, and the way he moved around her, always keeping his distance to show he respected her.

She took off her shoes after entering the apartment, put down her bag and her jacket. Sana went straight to the kitchen, where her mother was sitting, reading a book.

Keep reading