i wish i could take them all on at once

preview WIP panel of an upcoming short lapidot comic!

i just want to take a minute to remind you all that you aren’t a bad person for missing your abuser, and this comic will touch on why. i’ve been in the same position for the last 2-3 years and it’s been a tough recovery, but the first lesson you need to learn before you can heal is that it’s okay to miss them.

quick shoutout to this playlist which i pretty much listen to whenever i’m drawing lapidot (and i really wish i could listen to it more than once a day)

About Time // Part 3

Prologue | Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4

Type/Genre: Angst, Alternate Universe (Time Travel!au, Soulmate!au)

Word count: 8,421

Prompts: “What if you find your soulmate… at the wrong time?” - Lauren Kate, Passion

Summary: Be careful for what you wish for, because you may never know how to deal with them once it comes true. What would you do when your wish for a second chance actually came true? But was it really a fulfilled wish? Too many questions lie when it actually happened. Were they real memories? Or perhaps a part of a past life? Was it only a dream all along? Will everything be different this time?

a/n: I’m so sorry for taking so long to post this. I hope I can update the next part as soon as I can. Thank you for reading^^

Originally posted by won-der-land89


Keep reading

You were not worth any of the tears that I cried for you, you were not worth all the time that I spent on you. I used to think that I was in love with you but now I know that isn’t true. You took and took from me until there was nothing left, and then you were gone too. I can’t say that I miss you, because that would not be true. I can breathe without you here, I can feel my heart beating inside of my chest and for once, it does not feel heavy. You were a burden I was carrying around with me everywhere I went, a nightmare that I had even while I was awake. You never deserved me. I was overflowing with love and you took it all for granted. I spent so many of my words on you, and I know I can’t take them back, but I wish I could. I wish I could take them all back and hand them to someone who actually deserves them. These words that I’m writing for you right now are vacant of love. What I’m trying to say is that I do not love you anymore, and I don’t know if I ever truly did. I hope all of these words lay heavily on your conscience, because this is the last time I will ever write about you.
—  m.o.w, This is the last time I will ever write about you

Yes, this blog runs on a queue.
Yes, I still want to RP with you.
No, I’m not ignoring you.
No, I don’t hate your portrayal.

Please stop projecting such insecurities on me, because the truth of the matter is, I just don’t have enough time in the day to respond to everything all at once.  I wish I could, but I can’t.  Because sometimes I’m selective and sometimes real life comes first.  Running my blog on a queue has nothing to do with you as a roleplayer or as a person.  Running my blog on a queue is my personal choice for my personal comfort and enjoyment.

Anyway, we always preach about taking our time with one another for replies.  I don’t see how queuing them is any different.  It keeps me sane, and as a partner that should be good enough for you.

Those Tears That No One Ever Sees

Where once was a heart
lies an empty space
an abode for sorrow
the absence of grace
your smile tells little lies
I’m okay, truly I’m fine
it’s only a touch of darkness within
and soon again the sun will shine
then you flash your brightest smile
yet I can feel you’re ill at ease
and oh how I wish
I could take them all away
you know too well the ones I mean
those tears that no one ever sees

I think the most important thing to remember when analyzing Fitzsimmons’ interactions is that they are both human.

Such a simple concept, you would think, but I think we often (myself included) forget that when we analyze these characters, because so much of what they do is honestly superhuman. They are both geniuses and at the top of their respective field. They fight on against all odds, they are usually so kind and good in the face of all evil (even though if I was either of them I’d probably go home and stay in bed all day every day). Because of this, we forget that there are a lot of flaws and imperfections present. But most importantly, we forget that they’re allowed to have them.

Have you ever lashed out at a friend or loved one when you were hurting or angry or scared or feeling all of those at once? Have you ever said something nasty that you wish you could take back? Did it make you wrong to say that? Of course. Did it make you a bad person? No. I don’t know a single person who hasn’t done that.

Have you ever bottled up all of your emotions and wanted to keep them close? Have you ever been horribly conflict avoidant that you let problems or responsibilities escalate dramatically until you finally dealt with them? Was it a stupid thing to do? Probably. Does it make you a bad person? No.

Have you ever done something out of the best of intentions and have it gone horribly wrong? Did it sometimes take you a long time to realize that even though you did it to help the other person, it still hurt them and the have a right to be hurt? Does it make either of you wrong or right? Probably both.

Pointing out flaws in our favorite characters doesn’t mean we’re saying they’re bad people. They wouldn’t be three-dimensional if they didn’t have flaws. We all have them (and we’re often blind to them - just like they are.) 

The point is - don’t be afraid to admit that Fitz and Simmons are both flawed individuals (in fact - I think Fitz is a more well-rounded character narratively because he has been given more flaws, but that’s a meta for another time). That doesn’t mean you don’t like the character, or that they are bad people. The reason we love them is because their flaws are so relatable (and it’s why we jump to defend them - that’s great!) and these flaws are small peas in comparison to the amazing positive qualities they both have. 

people don’t talk enough about how hard it is to cut someone you once loved or still love, out of ur life. Like especially if its because the relationship has become toxic and mentally exhausting. from someone who has been in both ends of the stick it really fucking sucks. I’m used to people leaving all the time but its worse when u loved this person dearly and u invested so much of ur time to them. i wish i could take my memories back i wish i could forget people who have hurt me but only the ones that i love and perhaps still love because those are the worse

✕ NOMZ ✕
Sooo I wish I could bring all the rad NY restaurants down to where I live but I enjoyed them while I was there!
L O V E D my lunch yesterday at @bychefchloe 😍🔥 and it was too beautiful not to share!
Feeling so incredibly grateful to be a part of this community and have amazing experiences and memories because of it! 💚
✖️fun fact: I went over to a random person yesterday and asked if I could take a food picture on their table because it was prettier than my table 😆 come on, we’ve all “done it for the IG” once or twice 😜 It’s time for bed xx ✌🏼️😴
#bychloe #bychefchloe #nyc by kal_fitlife

It’s been a few weeks now since SFCon but I still can’t stop thinking about seeing J2 in person, up close. It was just as surreal as I thought it was going to be.

First entering the photo op room…and seeing them at the other end of the photo op room. I couldn’t help but smile this huge dorky smile, and I kept whispering, “oh my god, oh my god” to myself. 

The photo op line is one line that I wish could have lasted hours (well, once I was inside the room anyway, outside, not so much!) It was so amusing to watch them figure out the poses for peoples’ requests. And I was trying to take it all in, trying to burn it permanently into my my memory. The way Jensen chewed his gum, the way he and Jared would say things to each other between photo ops and laugh. Jared’s hair looks really soft in person. And in one person’s photo op, the way Jensen smiled made me think of Alec in Dark Angel…it was adorable. I kept trying to remind myself to look at Jensen’s eyes, to see just how green they really were. And I also kept thinking how weird it was to know that they were ACTUALLY in front of me, and not pixels on a screen.

I don’t even know where I’m going with this post but anyway

AND THEN I GOT UP CLOSE TO THEM

AND THEN IT WAS MY TURN

and Jensen said hi to me and I said hi and I walked up, got between them and put my arms around their waists and they put their arms around mine and *click* it was done. And then I looked at them again, said thank you, and left…

Best day EVER