i will eat what i want dammit

my friends watched some of miraculous ladybug for the first time. all they knew going into it is what i’ve said and a video that explained the love square

stuff that’s not in quotes is me, anything in quotes is one of my friends

(note: some pretty lowkey nsfw stuff because of who they are as people)

stormy weather

  • “its been 30 seconds you biG BABY”
  • “that’s [tikki] a small child"
  • “i have no idea what’s going on” oh my god just let it happen
  • “of course they always make the blonde girl the bitch” [we were on stormy weather and hadn’t met chloe]
  • “he’s cute”
  • transforming “oh jeez. of course there’s a transformation”
  • “look at that beautiful boy” [adrien]
  • “why does he have to have cat ears”
    “because he DOES”
  • chat comes onscreen “i love him”
  • “i love [chat]. i love him so much. i love. i love him so much”
  • “miraculous ladybug is my favorite anime”
  • “chat is my favorite”
  • “so they can figure [stormy weather] out, but they can’t figure out each other??!?!?!”
  • “this is a good episode of pokemon”
  • “that photographer needs to chill”

(evillustrator, lady wifi, the bubbler, and mr pigeon under the cut because this is So Long)

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Adventures In Babysitting

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Request: Can you make one where Bucky and the reader go out on a date night and leave their toddler behind with the rest of the team and then in the middle of their date they start getting all these texts from panicked members of the team because they don’t know how to take care of a child? Btw love your writing and blog!!!  (a/n: thank you <3)         

Y/C/N - Your Child’s Name

Bucky has created a chatroom.

Bucky has added Steve, Sam, Bruce, Clint, Natasha, Tony, Wanda.

Bucky: How is Y/C/N???

Sam: You and Y/N left for your date 20 minutes ago.

Bucky: So????


Bucky: Y/N and I are coming back home.

Wanda: Relax! We are competent aunts and uncles.


Wanda: Well, most of us are.

Keep reading


So ever since I saw that Shiro Mafia AU (which I honestly thought was a Kingsman AU) by @lordzuuko I have been itching to write something for it. And here it is. This is for Cathrel, thanks for creating such beautiful art dude.

Be warned I have no idea what it’s like to be a Spy orz so forgive the inaccuracies.

Disclaimer: The characters belong to DreamWorks.

(๑•̀ㅂ •́)و ✧

They’re shoved up against an alcove. Chests rising and falling as they try to quiet their breaths to not give themselves away. The smell of gunpowder, sweat and blood stick to their skins. Despite the issued guns Merlin gave them and the efficiency it gave to getting the job done much quicker, Keith preferred his blade and hand-to-hand combat training. Galahad told him he should learn to use the damned gun if he wanted get things done faster and saving him time or earning him extra to get the mission done. Keith thinks the man was a bit of a hypocrite considering Keith had seen feeds of his missions and watched him incapacitate guards and obstacles with his bare hands.

Keith strains his ears to catch the sound of fading footfalls. He hears the men speak in their guttural sounding language, it sounded German but not quite. He waits a few beats more to make sure the coast was clear. He tries ignoring the warm breath ruffling the hairs on his nape or the large hand on his waist. Or the fact that there’s warm liquid seeping into his suit. He grits his teeth, buries the screaming voice inside of his head and focuses on their current situation.

“K… Keith,” a voice whispers close to his ear. Keith ignores the labored breathing and steps out of the alcove pulling his companion along with him. They run and Keith spots a door, part of him tells him to keep moving. Their comms were down and Pidge wasn’t there to guide them. He does know that she’s doing everything in her power to restore the connection. Still, he knows he doesn’t have much time. But he also needs to do something first before they even begin to move.

He tries the door and he’s not surprised to find out that it’s locked. He digs through his pockets and takes out the lock-picking set Pidge had given him. He makes quick work of the door and pushes inside, Lancelot following suit. The room they got into was an office. There’s a large desk - complete with a desktop computer - near the windows, a couch, a bar in a corner and the generic things you would find in what seemed to belong to a high-ranking office worker.

Keith walks to the bar and grabs one of the bottles of alcohol. He digs through the drawers for a first aid kit and lets out a satisfied grunt when he does find it. Lancelot is leaning on the desk and Keith lays out the things he’ll need on the unoccupied space. He gently removes the hand putting pressure on the bleeding wound and checks it.

It’s not too deep, thank goodness. Keith shuts the voice up that’s telling him this is all his fault and mechanically starts cleaning the wound and patching Lancelot up. He could hear the grunts and hitched breathing as Lancelot bites off the sounds of pain. The idiot was still acting tough. Not that Keith would be any different. He is ignoring the twinge in his leg. Or that some of the blood staining his suit wasn’t Lancelot’s or the goons they had faced.

“Hey, Keith.” Lancelot calls him. But Keith only frowns and continues to wrap the bandages around his side. “Come on, Keith. You can’t still be mad at me. I said I was sorry.” Keith’s lips almost quirk at the definite whine tainting that deep smooth voice.

Focus, Kogane, he scolds himself, mentally shaking his head. He needs to get this done. Needs to make sure that he’s doing this right. Needs to assure himself that he’s doing something right. That Lancelot’s going to be all right. So concentrates at his task.

He scowls as the bandage loosens at Lancelot’s movement. “Shut up and stay still,” Keith growls in frustration as he pulls the bandages a little tighter in retaliation.

Lancelot grunts and even if Keith isn’t looking, he knows the man is frowning at him. “Be a little gentle, please? I know I probably deserve it for eating your caramel flan but I was too hungry and I’m an idiot for not checking if it had a note. I promise I’ll beg Hunk to make you some more.”

“It’s not about the damned caramel flan,” the younger man huffs as he finishes wrapping the bandages neatly.

“Then what? Is it Black? She didn’t grab your favorite hoodie, did she? You know how she likes your scent on it. Or did Lance get into your nerves again? Want me to talk to Hunk?”

Dammit Shiro. It’s none of those things!” Keith shouts, fists clenching and unclenching as the guilt gnaws at his insides. “I shouldn’t have pushed Galahad to let me come with you. Our mission was to gather intel. We were supposed to be in and out within fifteen minutes. Plug the thumb drive into the terminal and let Pidge’s program do its thing. But I insisted on checking the shipment that had just arrived and I almost jeopardized the mission and got you injured.”

He feels hands reach out and grab his own. He tries to pull away but Shiro is stronger and his hold tightens a little as he pulls him closer. The fight eases out of him and he grounds himself with the warmth of Shiro’s hand. Shiro always did have that effect on him. Keith was a raging storm and Shiro was his calm. When he feels himself getting ready to spring free like a dragon in chains, Shiro was the only person to settle him down.

You didn’t get me injured Keith,” Shiro tells him gently running his thumbs over Keith’s bruised knuckles. “I did that to myself.”

“But I—”

Shiro’s hand moves to hold his chin and tilts it so he’s meeting Shiro’s eyes the first time that night after he got wounded. “I did it to protect you. If it was anyone’s fault, it was mine. I didn’t think of a better way to stop it so I ran in front of that knife. Because if I didn’t, it would have killed you.”

Keith worries his lip, still refusing to accept that it wasn’t his fault that he had almost gotten both of them killed. “I could have handled it.”

“The man was aiming to pierce your lung.” The hardness in Shiro’s voice is enough to tell Keith that what he said is true. Even if Pidge is an amazing Merlin-trainee, there wouldn’t have been enough time to send an extraction and along with medics to get them out of there. He would have died on the way.

Shiro lets out a sigh and cups the younger agent’s cheek. “Keith not all missions go the way you planned them out to be. It’s part of our skill set to be able to adapt to any changes in the mission,” Shiro reminds him. “It’s why we’re great at being a Kingsman.”

“I know. I just— I was sc—”

Keith finds himself wrapped up in Shiro’s arms and his face pressed on the crook of the man’s neck. “Shh. I know. I know. I thought I’d lose you too.”

He buries his face closer to the juncture of Shiro’s neck and lifts his arms to wrap them around Shiro as well. His hands grip the material of the back of Shiro’s suit, careful not to jostle his injury. He grounds himself in the fact that Shiro, although injured, was all right. He would heal from this and he’ll be back to himself and in the field in no time. It was all Keith could hope for. Still, it scares him knowing that Shiro’s been doing this for years. That this knife wound was but another addition to the of scars decorating his body. It’s Shiro’s training that kept him alive this long. And that really is the least of it.

“Hey you know what’ll get me right as rain?” Shiro whispers.

“What?” Keith asks in a muffled voice.

“You familiar with that thing they say that kissing makes the pain go away?”

Keith extracts himself from the hug and stares at Shiro with incredulity. “I’m not kissing your boo-boo away Shiro.”

Shiro rolls his eyes exasperated. “I meant me, Keith. Kiss me.”

“You are ridiculous,” Keith deadpans. “Couldn’t you just have said that in the first place?”

“I thought you’d get what I meant, all right?” And Keith can’t even believe the fact that Shiro, youngest Kingsman to ever grace the ranks with a 90% success rate on missions, was pouting at him. “Come on, baby. I’m in pain here. Just one kiss and it’ll make the pain go away,” he pleads layering it with his signature puppy-eyed stare.

It was Keith’s turn to roll his eyes in exasperation. “I can’t believe I’m engaged to a dork.”

“But I’m your dork, my lovely Guinevere,” Shiro retorts with a boyish grin nuzzling Keith’s cheek. “So kiss?”

“As much as I hate to interrupt your romancing. The wizards are back online and we’re ready to get you out of there,” Pidge’s voice crackles to life into their comms.

“Couldn’t you have awaited a few more seconds?” Shiro huffs in slight annoyance.

Keith could have sworn Pidge cackled. “Dude, it’s not my fault I’m doing my job right. So shut up and listen to me carefully,” she shoots back, making Keith snort. They check their weapons and ready themselves to leave. Pidge is shooting off directions in their ears to get to the extraction point without getting caught or delayed.

Shiro meets his eyes, gun in his hand. “Ready?”

Keith nods, “Let’s get out of here.”

Friday Night Heathen Army Prompt- Loose Tongue

Here is my contribution to this week’s prompt fun! If you didn’t see it, I used the picture where Alex has his shirt up and is looking at a strip of his tummy 😉

This is completely ridiculous and silly, but the idea wouldn’t leave me. I imagine Ivar as often not really thinking about what he says before he says it. Please enjoy!

TW: none


“Do you think I’ve gained weight?”

You look up from your dinner to see Ivar standing in the hallway, shirt lifted as he stares at his perfectly toned stomach. You shrug, lifting another forkful of fried rice to your mouth. “I don’t know, why?”

He lowers his shirt, grabs his crutches and walks back to where you are sitting on the couch. “I’m just curious. Ubbe told me about the mystery that is ‘sympathy weight’.”

You frown. “Sympathy weight?”

He sighs, settling himself back down beside you. “It is exactly as it sounds, Y/N. The man unintentionally gains weight because he sees that his partner is gaining weight. It apparently happened to Ubbe. He gained almost 10 pounds when Margrethe was pregnant.”

You rub your swollen belly, trying to remember what Ubbe looked like 3 years ago. “I can’t remember him looking any different. Besides, who cares if you gain a little weight? I shouldn’t be the only one who has to.”

He gives you that patented 'Ivar’ eye roll. “I don’t care, I was just curious. But I wouldn’t be surprised if I did. The things we’ve been eating lately, it’s no wonder you’ve gotten so big.”

That makes you set down your fork. “Excuse me?”

He shrugs his shoulders. “It’s not a bad thing. The baby needs energy. Lots of Mexican food and sugar energy, apparently.”

You can already feel the tears pricking at the back of your eyes. “So what, I’m a huge whale who is making you eat shitty food against your will?”

Your tone catches his attention, and a wary look crosses his face. “You know I didn’t mean it like that, Y/N….”

“Well then what did you mean it like?” You can feel yourself getting riled up. Damn pregnancy hormones. “What did you mean, Ivar? Am I getting ugly too? Will you not want to have sex with me soon? Are you trying to tell me that?”

He grits his teeth, his brow creasing in frustration. “Dammit woman, you know that’s not true. We’ve had sex more times than I can count since you got pregnant. You know what seeing you carrying my child does to me.”

You know he’s right, he’s been practically insatiable ever since you told him the news almost 6 months ago. Rip your clothes off, do it anywhere, I need you right this second sort of insatiable. You are lucky your sex drive has risen to match his. But it’s too late now. The damage has been done.

“You think I’m huge and fat and ugly,” you sob. “My belly is like a giant balloon, I’m covered in stretch marks, my skin is breaking out and I can’t stop eating or crying! I’m a mess and you hate it!”

“Odin’s beard, woman, calm down!” Ivar reaches for you, but you push him away and turn your back on him. You hear him run his hands through his hair and snarl in frustration as you continue to cry.

“Dammit,” he curses to himself, and you feel the couch shift as he leans towards you.

“You are not huge, fat or ugly,” he says in his 'you will listen and not interrupt me’ tone. “You are beautiful and glowing with life. Life we created together. I didn’t think with my condition I would be able to give you children. When you told me you were pregnant, it was beyond my wildest dreams. You will get bigger, it’s the natural way. But I shouldn’t have phrased it like I did. I am sorry for that.”

You sniff, wiping your eyes on your hands. You can feel your anger slipping away at his sincere words. Ivar is working on getting better at apologizing when his mouth gets ahead of his brain, and you appreciate the effort.

“I’m sorry too,” you say, turning back around to face him. “I am taking everything so personally lately. These hormones are ridiculous.”

He reaches up and gentle wipes away a stray tear with one calloused thumb. “It’s not so bad. Remember Margrethe? How many times did Ubbe sleep on the couch because she had thrown a hormone addled fit and tossed him out of bed?”

You can’t help but giggle at the memories. “True. I would never kick you out of bed. I need you to keep me warm.”

He gives you a wicked grin. “Among other things,” he says, letting his tongue run slightly over his bottom lip. You shiver, feeling the familiar stir of desire deep within you.

He notices, and his grin gets even more sinful. He reaches into the bag beside him and pulls out a box of store brownies, your biggest pregnancy craving. “How about we forget what just happened and have some dessert, and then some….dessert.”

You look at the brownies and then to him, watching his pupils slowly begin to consume the vivid blue of his irises. You feel the familiar flush of heat beginning to spread over your body. The brownies look delicious, but him even more so. You give him a saucy smile.

“I don’t think I’m craving brownies anymore,” you say, and it’s all the invitation he needs. The box is tossed to the floor and for the next hour, you forget all about hormones and brownies and Ivar’s loose tongue.

Well, maybe not about the tongue.

Dedicated to me, who once threw the biggest pregnancy hormone induced fit over the fact the bank wasn’t open when I needed to go there. Those hormones are real, folks!

If You Won’t Love Yourself, We Will

Originally posted by amynelsons

Request: Hiya. Its me again. I’m sorry 😳 but um, I was wondering if you could do an Ethan imagine (I frickin love Ethan) where y/n isn’t very skinny and is slightly overweight and is so self concious of her body and what not and Ethan is there to tell her encouraging words to.her (it doesn’t have to be romantic but I wouldn’t mind if it is) sorry this is so long

Summary: Fem!Reader is overweight and self conscious about it and Ethan goes and makes her feel better about herself. What a nice guy I love Ethan.

A/N: Hey guys, this request hit very close to home as I too struggle with being self conscious about the way I look and wih body dysmorphia. It sucks, and there are definitely better days than others, and I wanted to kinda depict the way I personally feel on the bad days when I don’t want anyone to see me. It’s unedited because I honestly just didn’t want to reread it and get sad while watching Harry Potter. As always, italics signify the inner monologue of a character. Hope you guys enjoy this one. Also I’m pretty sure I’ve used that gif of Ethan before, but I kinda had to use it for this fic, it’s too perfect not to.

Wordcount: 1190good length, yes?

Request some more guys!

Keep reading


Start Weight: 197lbs
2nd photo: 178 lbs
3rd photo: 153 lbs
44 pounds down 30 to go
This is a difficult journey. I’ve gone through so many ups and downs in the past year. I still find myself wandering off my fitness path but I want to look like Sandra Prikker dammit!
Healthy eating and drinking 2 liters of water a day. Also 1-2 hours at the gym 6 times a week.
I love what I’m starting to look like and I feel so strong.
You guys should see my skin. I’m 29 but I look like a 22 yr old. Water is my bff!!

q & a;

member- taekook x you

genre- so fluffy you may die

words- 1,863

summary- (requested) taehyung is a youtuber & his viewers really want you and Jungkook to do the relationship tag. polyamorous!au

a/n- finally more taekook! this is for @sugasangel since you were so sweet and wanted a taekook scenario!! i know this isn’t your specific request, but i hope you still enjoy it! 

Originally posted by girlin-luv

You were sold right away by the idea, but Jungkook took a little convincing.

“It’s silly,” he insisted with a frown and crossed arms.

Taehyung made his best puppy-dog eyes and stared right into Jungkook’s soul. “C'mon, please? All my viewers really want this video to happen and I can’t do it with just Y/N.”

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“your friend set you up on a blind date and i happened to be eating alone so you thought you were meeting me and you were cute so i went along with it but you just got a text from said friend that theyre sorry your date stood you up and now i have some explaining to do” au

I got a lot of requests to do this one so: 

Eating alone wasn’t as refreshing as everyone said it would be. Will was a people person. He liked having people around to talk to and fall into conversation with. While he didn’t feel awkward or judged for sitting alone, he just didn’t enjoy it.

He’d brought a book to read, but he could exactly focus on turning pages when he was planning to use two hands to eat. Then what would he do while he was eating? He didn’t want to turn on his phone and watch Netflix in the middle of a restaurant. Not only would that look incredibly stupid, but he didn’t even have enough data to do so.

He stood up and decided to simply get some takeout and eat it at home in his room where he would be able to be half asleep, watching TV in his shorts and munching on his food without worrying about how to keep busy.

As he walked, someone behind him said, “Oh, uh. Hi. Are you Alex?” Will turned in confusion and stopped short, gasping softly. In front of him, biting his lip nervously, was the most beautiful human Will had ever seen.

His eyes were such a deep dark brown, they looked nearly black with long dark lashes surrounding them. His skin was a smooth olive tone, his cheeks splattered with a few very light freckles. His hair was a messy of curled waves sticking out in different spot in a way Will could never hope to pull off. He wore a long sleeved shirt with the Marauder’s Map depicted on it, and torn dark jeans with combat boots.

It was a perfect mix of mysterious bad boy with adorable dork.

“S-Sorry?” Will responded, forgetting how to form words.

“I’m Nico. Uh, Jason’s friend? For the uh, blind date. Wait, is it you, or… I’m sorry if-”

“No, no, yeah. Yeah, it’s me,” Will said hurriedly, only realizing how stupid, short-lived, and completely insane the lie was after he’d blurted it out.

“Oh thank God,” Nico breathed. “Sorry, I get nervous. I don’t really go out much.” He smiled nervously and Will bit his lip. “Did you get a table yet?”

“Uh, yeah. Yeah, over here.” He led Nico to the table he’d been sitting at previously and chuckled nervously. His eyes kept flitting to the doors, hoping that whoever his actual blind date was wouldn’t recognize him or come in. But then, if he didn’t even know what Nico would look like, and they saw Nico with Will, they wouldn’t even think to ask, right? So he was safe…. For now.

“So Jason said you went to school with him?” Nico asked, skimming the drink list.

“Yeah. But, I mean instead of going off what Jason said, let’s just start new between us, yeah?”

Nico smiled awkwardly and nodded. “Sure,” he said with a small chuckle. “I mean he hadn’t told me much anyway. Just that he knew you from his last high school and you were a really great guy. So… are you going to go to college?”

“I sure hope so,” he answered. “I want to go to UT maybe. I want to be a doctor, but I’m not sure what I’d specialize in. There’s a lot of fields within it, you know?”

Nico’s eyes shone with excitement. “Yeah, I get that. Completely. I’m really into health as well. I’m good with gore, but I think I’d be more in the psychological area, like mental health.” He shrugged. “I’m still not sure.”

“I mean we’re high schoolers. I don’t think we’re supposed to be sure.”

“Thank God you agree,” he muttered. “Everyone’s trying to go down my throat and force me to choose something specific right now and it’s driving me crazy. Is it such a bad thing to want to stay in arcade and blow off steam for a while?”

“An arcade?” Will repeated.

“I can play Pac-Man and Galaga like no one’s business, dude. I’m a pro.” Will laughed and shook his head. “What, you don’t believe me? We can go to an arcade after we eat and I will prove it to you.”

“You’re saying it like you need to defend your honor,” he chuckled.

“It is,” Nico said, trying not to laugh. “I’m sorry, I’m being a dork.”

“Don’t apologize,” he said. “It’s… endearing.” Nico scoffed and focused on the menu. “So… why did you agree to a blind date? Didn’t anyone ever ask you in person? Oh- uh, not to be rude, it’s just… this is going to sound so lame, but you really don’t look like someone who’d struggle to get a date.”

Nico’s cheeks burned bright and he bit his lip. “Ah… thanks. Um, let’s go back to the ‘I’m awkward and dorky’ part, tell me where I lose you.” Will burst into laughter and covered his mouth to stifle it. Nico rolled his eyes and smirked. “Why did you agree? You definitely shouldn’t need to.”

Will smirked and raised an eyebrow. “I don’t know. I never really paid attention to anyone at my school. I want to broaden my horizons I guess? I don’t know. But I’m glad I did.” Nico smiled ran his hand through his hair.

They ordered their drinks and food and spent the time talking about different topics, from Harry Potter to music to TV shows to their favorite movies and their families. Will was surprised to find that Nico had actually had a very horrible past, which he tried to downplay by brushing over details instead of delving into it, but Will knew how much it mattered. Losing family and being bullied wasn’t easy. And something told Will that his awkwardness was actually anxiety, and he simply didn’t pay attention to it.

But Will wouldn’t push. He enjoyed hearing him talk, enjoyed making him laugh and being made to laugh. He didn’t remember the last time he laughed so much. When they finished lunch, Will stood and said, “So, are we testing your arcade skills?”

Nico’s smile widened and he stood to follow Will out of the restaurant.

They walked to an arcade across a pizzeria and Will could see the excitement and relaxation flood through Nico. It was like he was somewhere comfortable, somewhere he could be himself in. “Get ready to get your ass whooped,” Nico said, smiling cockily.

And sure enough, Nico beat Will at every arcade game they tried and at every rematch they had. He was skilled in every game, and won quickly or by a large margin. “How the hell are you that good?” Will said in shock after his hundredth defeat.

Nico chuckled and rubbed his hands together. “Um. Well, when bad stuff happened, I’d always go to an arcade to sort of… I don’t know get away from it? I spent a lot of times in arcades when I was little. They’re still a good place to go when I get upset.” Will nodded.

“Well it is now my mission in life to beat you at at least one arcade game.” Nico laughed and sat beside him.

Suddenly the score for Harry Potter went off and Nico pulled out his phone. “Hello? Hey! Look the- wait. What? What are you…?” Nico stood up and looked at Will with wary and shock. “No. No it’s fine. I said it’s fine! I have to go.” He hung up and suddenly, Will saw the dangerous bad boy side get emphasized in his demeanor. “Who the hell are you?”

“Uh… what?” Will questioned.

“You’re not Alex. Apparently Alex stood me up. So who the hell are you and why did you tell me you were?” he growled, his expression darkening as he stepped toward Will.

Immediately, Will stood up and bit his lip, his entire face reddening from embarrassment. He was positive he looked like a blond tomato. “Um… N-Nico, I-”

“Are you some sort of fucking psychopath?” he snapped.

“No!” he protested. “God, no, Nico! I’m sorry, okay? I’m sorry I lied. I… Please stop looking at me like that.”

“No! I’m angry! I’m embarrassed, and honestly a little fucking scared! Who are you?”

“My name is Will,” he started. Nico’s eyes widened in anger and he put his hands in his hair. “Wait, just…. Dammit. Look, I was eating alone, okay? And I got really uncomfortable, so I was going to leave but then you ran into me and…. You’re insanely attractive and I could barely think so when you asked if it was me you were meeting I said yes, And then we were sitting and talking and laughing and I laughed more than I have in a long time, and… I didn’t want just blurt that I wasn’t actually supposed to be your date.”

Nico narrowed his eyes, and clenched his fists. “What were you planning to have happen? Have me call you Alex for a few months? Have me gush to Jason about how great things went with Alex? Were you ever planning on telling me anything? Ever?”

“I… I don’t know! I wanted- no I still want to see you again, to hang out with you again. I would’ve told you, I just… I don’t know how or when.” Nico furrowed his eyebrows and crossed his arms, standing alert and defensive. “I’m sorry, Nico. But everything else I said was true. Me wanting to be a doctor and loving Harry Potter and the jokes and… all of the rest was real. Didn’t you… I mean…. If I was Alex… would you have been okay with seeing me again?”

Nico’s lips parted but he didn’t say anything. He looked away from Will and stared at the ground, his breaths slowly turning back to normal. “Alex stood me up,” he muttered. “I… I did have fun. But now I feel very stupid because I went up to you and assumed you were supposed to be my date and spent all this time thinking your name is Alex, and it’s actually Will, and…. I feel stupid.”

Will cleared his throat and rubbed his arm. “Well… I was so dumbstruck when you talked to me that I pretended to be some guy named Alex and I just got found out so…. I feel pretty stupid too.”

Finally Nico’s eyes returned to him. He was still angry, but not as much. “Then I guess we’re even.” Will wasn’t sure what that meant.

He gulped and took a breath. Then he stood up and held out his hand. “Hey, I’m Will. I’m eighteen. Nice to meet you.” Nico furrowed his eyebrows and stared at his hand. Hesitantly, he shook it.

“Hello, Will.”

“Would you… maybe like to go on a date sometime? I promise not to stand you up or use a fake name.”

Nico’s eyes, dark and big and endearing flickered up to him. He as suppressing a smile, but eventually it became a smirk. Will could feel butterflies in his stomach. “Okay,” he said softly. “I think that’d be nice.”

  • Joonmyun: dammit I think we lost the others
  • Minseok: oh?
  • Joonmyun: CHANYEOL!
  • Joonmyun: BAEKHYUN!
  • Joonmyun: YIXING!!!
  • Joonmyun: JONGDAE!!!!
  • Joonmyun: KYUNGSOO???
  • Joonmyun: JONGIN???
  • Joonmyun: SEHUN????!!!!!
  • Joonmyun: WHERE ARE THEY???????
  • Minseok: *shrugs* i'm hungry
  • Chanyeol: WHO'S HUNGRY
  • Baekhyun: R U HUNGRY HYUNG
  • Yixing: ah hyung did you skip a meal
  • Kyungsoo: what do you wanna eat umin hyung
  • Jongin: hyung let's go have a meal
  • Sehun: ah hyung I want food too
  • Minseok: found them
  • Joonmyun:
  • Luhan: (in China) hey did you hear something
  • Kris: idk
  • Tao: ?
Utaite Quotes Round 3

un:c at 8:03 AM : Going to sleep ( ՞ٹ՞)
un:c at 7:57 PM : Wait. It’s night?

KK: I’ve learned not to fear the crows around dumpsters, and their sounds don’t bother me anymore.
Eve: Can you talk to them?
KK: Caw~
Eve: hahahah…… (dammit, I gotta do something about this bastard fast)
(* parody of Light’s line in Death Note)

Mafumafu: Soraru san resembles a snowman for some reason.
Soraru: I don’t know….
Mafumauf: You know, with the muffler and all!

Mafumafu: I’ve lost interest in women after I met Soraru san.

Interveiwer: What do you think about Touyu san?
Amatsuki: Going out to eat with him makes me happy. We can stroke our bellies and be happy.

Fan: What do you want to do if you can become a magical boy(mahoushounen)?
Kogeinu: I want to fight with my followers.

Samuraiman: It’s okay….. I practiced handle steering for one hour yesterday in the bathroom with my bowl, today’s driving will be fine!

Itou Kashitarou: I can’t forgive you… Amatsuki-!! Buy me ramen!!
Itou Kashitarou: I know now. My attacks are meaningless to you, Amatsuki. I’ll act more mature.
Amatsuki: Eh wat

(At three in the morning on twitter)
Han: Haa….. I want your ass so hard….
TMDC: No… not that…..
Han: Ha….. no… accept me…
TMDC: Ah hyung….. (=neesan in japanese, kinda means brother)

Amatsuki: Kogeinu san, your name can also be read as Kogeken, so why don’t you write your name as コゲ犬(kanji)-こげいぬ(kana)- too?
(* Amatsuki writes his name as Amatsuki(kanji)-amatsuki(kana)-, because his name can also be read in many other ways such as tengetsu. the kana between the hyphens dictate how to read the kanji.)
Kogeinu: Somebody take him to the hospital

Fan: Work lol
Glutamine: No lol

Amatsuki: This is our first collab!
un:c: I like health and sex ed.
Amatsuki: I liked how we shouted together at the end!
un:c : I like health and sex ed.
Amatsuki: Please enjoy!
un:c: health and sex ed
Amatsuki: I don’t care anymore….
(Lost one’s weeping upload comment)

Soraru: Amatsuki offered to bath together and I refused, and I think he got grumpy.
Amatsuki: This is not what it sounds like
(* In asia it’s okay for same-sex people to bath together, See the Conan show korean spa clip for an idea…)

Soraru: Anyone who is cute, kind, good with kids, committed, hard-working and good at cooking and cute is good, so will said person go out with me

Yuuto: A 31 year old man sings the song of an 18 year old boy w
(Lost Time Memory upload comment)

Itou Kashitarou: I thought the only reason I would appear on the news would be when I do something illegal and become a convict, but then I realized that I would never have the guts to do so.
(After the info for his one man live came up on yahoo news)

DC: My followers are decreasing, but I’m hoping that all the people that are left are pretty girls. One can dream.
Fan: I’m a guy.
DC: Uh, sorry…

S!N: Hashiyan san, I’m not familiar with baseball, so maybe I could go watch a game with a high school girl.
Hashiyan: Police officer, come get this guy.

Underbar: For some reason Animal Crossing is getting popular. I’ve gotten it a while ago. I paid off my debts and played a little while, but nobody visited me so I got lonely and sold it off.

Akatin: While I was asking Mafumafu to work on my songs, I touched his bu- no, it’s nothing.

Fan: Dasoku san! I left my house keys at my house by mistake! What do I do?
Dasoku: Move

Itou Kashitarou: Hashiyan san, did you have a good night? I didn’t, because Amatsuki was talking in his sleep all night.
Amatsuki: Idiiiooot Idiiiioooooot! I’m hungry, let’s go eat
Aho no Sakata: I'mhungryI'mhungryI'mhungryI'mhungry
(Saint Smiley 2GS members on their trip together, via twitter)

Itou Kashitarou: The world is much more kinder than I thought! I’ve been hiding my eyes and crouching, but the world is nothing to be afraid of….? Wait…. I’m Mary? (Kagerou Project reference)

Soraru: Can I pay my delusion tax and become a pretty girl with big boobs
(Delusion Tax upload comment)

Fan: Can I go to your live performance alone?
Itou Kashitarou: I was alone most of my life anyways! Please come!

Michan: Like this, goodbyes always come suddenly…….Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa Help meeeeeeeee
(Tweet after he dropped his phone into water)

Fan: Have you ever been hurt because of love?
Itou Kashitarou: Never. I’ve never fallen in love in the first place.
Itou Kashitarou: Kekekeke.

luz: When I met up with Mafu kun and Uratan, they had the same hats and I went Eh (lets imagination go wild).
Mafumafu: Not only hats, but our shoes were the same color too.

Amatsuki: I had some time so I went to Mafu kun’s house with Kony to give him a birthday cake! It’s not his birthday or anything by the way!
Mafumafu: Seriously what the heck, the bell was ringing so I got the door and I got my birthday celebrated.

Itou Kashitarou: I read that putting salt in your bath helps you relax. So I put in this. (picture of “Magic salt Spice&herb) The basil clogged my pipes.
Itou Kashitarou: Oh well, happy lunar new year for the chinese people out there! Everyone, have a year full of happiness! Even though my bath is full of basil…
Itou Kashitarou: I’m staring closely at the floating basil…. They won’t flow!!
Itou kashitarou: Well, at least I could tell everyone not to use magic salt in your bath….
Hashiyan: Everyone is telling me not to put edible salt in my bath, but nobody does that, not even in comedy shows.

Itou Kashitarou: I just updated my blog about the relation between pancakes and ramen.

EXO Reactions: Monster


“She got, me,goin’ crazaaaayyooh!”

“Why is,my heart, raciiiiing?”

“Why are,you,singiiinng?”

“well I was trying to be romantic but you just had to be a bitch..”


“Everyone’s afraid of me,so i’m untouchable man!”

“I don’t think people are afraid of a giant puppy who is obsessed with bubble tissue and cries when he eats peppers.”


“I’ll play with you however I want…”

“HAH! bitch no! you ain’t getting any of this fine ass.”



“I’m gonna mess you up…”
“How about no.”
“That wasn’t a question…”


“You can call me monster!”


“Wait what?”

“I like Nini better.”


“Yeah,i’m gonna call you Nini.”


You:*passes an alleyway*

Chen:*Comes out from the shadows and watches you walk down the street*Creeping,creeping,creeping…i’ll see you when you get home darling~*blows you a kiss*


“It has started inside of me,sending a danger signal.”

“Wtf does that mean? Did I give you a boner or something?”




You:*Bends over to pick something up*

Sehun: *Adjusts his glasses*That’s right my type~…


“I’ll knock so will you let me in?”

“Fine! But this is the last time you lose your keys Kim Junmyeon!”

anonymous asked:

Would you do an oneshot about the reactions of Luffy, Law, Kid, Ace, Sanji and Zoro after feeling their unborn babies move in their mother's belly suddenly during an argument about her needing to rest?

(Of course! Here you go! I hope you enjoy it~! Due to pregnancy, female pronouns are being used.)


The captain loved adventure and loved being able to wander around. This only intensified when he was with his girlfriend. He loved being able to explore with her. However, when she became pregnant and Chopper told him about her needing to be careful, his protectiveness went up. Luffy wanted to make sure (Y/N) would always be safe and he would do anything to keep her that way.

At first she thought this was kind of sweet, but when he was telling her he didn’t want her walking around and straining herself, it started to become an issue with (Y/N). She didn’t want to just have to sit there all day. (Y/N) liked being able to move around when she wanted, so she stopped listening to Luffy and would get up and move whenever she pleased. She wasn’t foolish enough to do anything that could cause any problems, she just needed to be able to move on her own.

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“Ah sweet, rents low and close to work!” 
You’d been looking to get out of your old apartment and into something new. So later that day you texted the number that was given in the ad and got the ok to go check out the place. When you got there and knocked a guy in his robe answered.

“Uh, hey I’m here about the extra room.” You said checking out the man letting out a small laugh.

“You’re a girl?.” He replied confused.

“Yea last time I checked…”

“It’s just that– well aren’t you– I don’t think–”

“Look dude, just because I have boobs doesn’t mean that I’m gonna be a bad roommate.” You cut in.

“Oh god no, that’s not where I’m getting at! Just th-that I wasn’t expecting a girl, that’s all..”

“Oh.. Well now that we got gender 101 out of the way, lets see some house.” You ended up moving in a few weeks later and have been living there for about a month.

“Hey chuck did you eat the left over pizza?!”

“Uh.. depends?”

You closed the fridge and looked around the wall to question him. “Depends on what Shurley?”

“Did you want it?”

“If I didn’t would I be asking you?” You raised an eyebrow at him.

Chuck shrugged his shoulders grinning and looked back down at his computer. You picked up a pillow and threw it at him.

“God dammit kid!” You laughed.

The doorbell rang and he started his way over to answer it.

“That better be the pizza you ordered for me because you felt bad!” You yelled from the kitchen. His smile dropped when he opened the door.

“Well someone looks a little happy to see us.” A man with a deep voice replied

“Well can you blame him?” A more calming voice spoke.

The men walked past Chuck and into the living room.

“See you decided to clean up a bit, what’d you get a girlfriend?”

“What can I do for you guys?”

“Sam and I need your ‘help’ finding something. You up to it?”

“Uhh…” Chuck looked around nervously, “Sure! Yea, why not.”

“Are you alright Chuck?” Sam asked.

Just then you walked around the corner capturing everyone’s attention. You were surprised and so was everyone else.

“Ahh Chuck, I thought we told you not to do this man. Here honey, take this and run along.” Dean went to hand you money before his friend put his arm down slowly.

“Do I seriously look like the kind of girl who would do that kind of thing?” You asked glaring at the man in front of you. He stood there mumbling trying to figure out what to say.

“I’m Y/N, I pay half the damn rent. You want some coffee?” You asked giving a fake smile before walking out of the room.

“Feisty one isn’t she?” Dean asked nervously while Sam let out a small laugh.

“Yea, but she grows on you.” Chucked replied while he sat down rubbing his face smiling.

Have a Pumpkin

Neil was pouting. He kept telling Nicky that he was fine but it was obvious that Neil was actually very bothered by Andrew’s absence.

“Neil, Kevin and I are eating ice cream and watching a movie, want to join us?”

“No,” Neil replied, and continued staring moodily out the window.

“What if we watched an Exy game? Oh! We should rewatch the last Trojans game!”

Nicky was trying so hard but Neil just shook his head. From the living room Kevin yelled, “I heard that Hemmick! I’m switching it over to the game!”

Nicky groaned. “Dammit. I’ve been trying to get him–or any of you heathens–to watch Civil War with me. Do you know how sad it is to geek out over Sebastian Stan and Chris Evans all by yourself?”

Neil was not listening. He was checking his phone again to see if Andrew had texted him. Nothing.

“I’m going for a run,” Neil said.

It wasn’t terribly late but the sun had already set and it was a little chilly, but that was normal for late October in South Carolina.

Neil ran his usual circuit around campus and replayed his earlier conversation with Andrew. They had just finished practice and Neil, after being hassled by one of the new players, just wanted to go somewhere and be alone with Andrew. And Andrew said no, he was supposed to spend some time with Renee. Neil hated feeling needy but he asked if he could come too but Andrew turned him down. And it had hurt.

It was stupid. Andrew could do what he wanted, it wasn’t like they were joined at the hip. Neil ran faster until he was almost gasping. His body had led him to the stadium so Neil went in and began running up and down the stadium stairs. The repetition and rhythm numbed his thoughts and narrowed his focus to the task of climbing up and running down. He was so focused that it took him several minutes to realize that he was not alone.

He smelled the cigarette smoke before he saw Andrew lounging near the home side benches. Neil paused to wipe the sweat off his face before jogging over.

“Hey,” Neil said. He was flushed and sweaty and breathless, while Andrew just stood there, cool and composed in his standard black clothes.

Andrew blew smoke in Neil’s face. “Hey yourself.”

Neil pretended to cough. “How did you know I was here?”

“Nicky said you were sulking and went for a run.” Andrew gave Neil a knowing look. “You’re a creature of habit, Josten. When in doubt, go with Exy, right?”

“I’m not that predictable.”

Andrew rolled his eyes. “Whatever, junkie.”

Neil sighed. There was no arguing with Andrew about that. “I’m going to shower. Wait for me?”

Andrew nodded and they walked into the locker room.

Neil cleaned up and came out wearing some extra sweats that he kept in his locker. Andrew was lying on the couch.

“Scoot over,” Neil said, nudging Andrew with his knee. Andrew moved over so that Neil could fit on the couch with him. It was a tight sqeeze with them lying on their sides, so close together that their knees bumped against each other.

“The answer is yes, by the way,” Neil said, wriggling closer to Andrew.

“No one asked,” Andrew said. “Aren’t you going to ask what Renee and I were up to this afternoon?”

“I assumed that you two were sparing.”

Andrew shook his head. “Though we did practice our knife skills.” He paused and looked away, though he and Neil were so close that it was a mostly foregone gesture. Andrew’s voice was soft as he said “I made something for you.”

Neil was nonplussed. That was certainly unexpected. Andrew bought him things from time to time but he had never made anything for him.

“What is it?” Neil asked. “Is it here?”

“Yes. Do you want it now or later?”

“Now.” Making out could wait. A surprise gift could not.

“Alright but you have to shut your eyes.”

Andrew scrambled over Neil and Neil shut his eyes. He heard Andrew rummaging around, then the sound of Andrew’s Bic lighter (wtf?) and the click of the lights being turned off. Neil had no idea what was going on. Did Andrew make him a cake? A candle?

“You can open your eyes now,” Andrew said.

Neil did and he saw a glowing carved face of a fox. It was orange. Neil cocked his head, considering.

“It’s a jack o’ lantern, Neil,” Andrew explained.

“Oh! I’ve never seen one close up. You carved this?!”

Andrew placed the pumpkin in Neil’s outstretched hands. The carving was super detailed.

“This must have taken hours,” Neil observed. “Andrew, it’s so perfect. It’s like art.”

“Renee and I picked them at this pumpkin patch that her church has. We spent the afternoon carving them. She made one for Jean and Jeremy; she’s going to bring it to them when we all get together at Eden’s for the Halloween party this weekend.”

Neil nodded and traced the carving with his fingers.

“Can we keep this in our room?” Neil asked.

“If you want,” Andrew replied. Neil could tell he was pleased. Neil placed the pumpkin on the table and took Andrew’s hands in his.

“Thank you,” Neil said. It was a thank you that encompassed many things: that Andrew cared for him, that he used his weapons to make something beautiful for Neil, that he spent time being there for him.

Andrew pressed Neil down onto the couch. Neil sank into the cushions and gazed up at Andrew, his face partially illuminated by the soft flickering candlelight. His fingers threaded through Andrew’s pale hair before resting on the nape of his neck. Andrew kissed Neil. Their touches and kisses were almost painfully light and agonizingly slow, like a gentle teasing. It was a different pace for them but Neil decided, as Andrew licked at the dip below his jutting hip bone with lazy strokes, that he rather liked it. The candlelight made everything feel hazy and…romantic. That was a strange thought. Then Andrew’s hand moved down the front of Neil’s loose sweatpants and all thoughts were banished from his mind.

The next morning Kevin and Nicky made sure to give Andrew grief over the pumpkin.

“What’s next?” Nicky asked. “Apple pies? Pumpkin spice lattes?”

“Hey,” Kevin interjected, “there’s nothing wrong with pumpkin spice lattes!”

Neil just grinned and held Andrew’s hand. His boyfriend had carved him a pumpkin—magic was well and truly in the air.

*I threw in the PSL for @pumpkinspicekevinday in honor of her new url ;)

Not My Father’s Son: Chapter 4

Previous Parts

Pairing: Dean x Reader

Prompt: AU- Non-Supernatural Verse: Dean visits Y/N at school; Sam pushes him to his limit

Warnings: AU, fluff, brotherly moment 

Words: 1876

Note: The smut will be in the next part!! I had it in this one, but then it was like 4,000+ words so I split it into two. I really hope you guys like this. Even if you don’t, I’m going to continue it because I really like it and enjoy writing it. xoxo

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Fantasy (aka Family Man 2)

It hurts how fucking close he is to all of this.

Carl sits to his left, Judith to his right. At one point, Lucille sat up in that chair closest to him, but Negan placed her on the floor to make room for Judith. She has a small bit of spaghetti on her tray and a cut up roll beside that, Carl is watching her intently from across the table.

“Well, Carl, dear, this all looks fucking delicious.”

Carl scowls and that’s not the reaction Negan wants. He wants a smile, a ‘thank you’, a kiss on the cheek. But no, he gets silence and anger.

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The last scene of 7x10
  • Girls: *Enter house*
  • Hanna: Animals? In an abandoned nature infested house? How can this be?
  • Jenna: Whaddup bithes I learnt how to plug in a speaker
  • Jenna: Btw I'm still pissed at you for doing that one thing when we were 15
  • Me: How does bitch know that they r giving her the real drive it could be a fake
  • Me: In fact why didn't they just do that
  • Me: This damned show...
  • Emily: Omfg this baby doll so cute I wanna raise a kid with Ali
  • Emily: *leaves phone and doesn't notice*
  • Me: How does anyone in this day and age just leave their fucking phone
  • Me: Wasn't she using it for light
  • Me: Did she not realize it was suddenly fucking dark
  • The Girls: Well we know their is a manic blind girl in here who probs wants to kill us and we should rly be leaving before shit goes down, but let's go exploring!
  • Aria: Welp let's not say Beetlejuice 3 times ya'll
  • Aria: #AriaInWonderland
  • Emily: Oops silly me just left my phone upstairs im such a dork
  • Hanna: babe ill go with you #hannily
  • Emily: Aw ty kinda hoping Ali would go with me but anyway xo
  • Hanna: Omfg there's someone up here. I didn't expect that!Whatever shall we do?
  • Emily: I know! Let's hide behind some large shelves he'll never see us!
  • Hanna: Great idea omg this is y we r friends
  • Noel: Look how cliche I am being today
  • Jenna: Come out come out where ever you are
  • Yes I'm talking to you Alison
  • If ya know what I mean
  • Jenna: *takes 5 steps up the stairs*
  • Aria: Let's call the cops we all know how much they will help us
  • Ali: Omg yeh and I'll text Emmy boo
  • Noel: Here comes a choppa to chop off ya head!
  • Ali: Omg wut bowling balls can curve through corridors now? Ya learn somethin new every day
  • Jenna: Watch me turn the lights off so ya'll see pitch darkness haha omg I'm so clever ten points to Jenna
  • Noel: I'm so misunedrstood nobody ever loved me
  • Noel: W8 CUT Marlene y am i even tryna kill these girls they ain't done shit to me
  • Emily: Woo hoo look at me go I just killed another guy!
  • Hanna: Omg well done Em
  • Aria: Omfg its a head aaah Im screaming wonder who's head it is
  • Aria: Where is Ezra when i need him
  • Jenna: Haha look at me im winning Noel just killed Hannily and them bitches are running for thier lives.
  • Jenna: Woops just accidentally kicked my boyfriend's head
  • Aria: Omg a blind girl has a gun we will all die !
  • Jenna: Haha I just shot Ali
  • Spencer: *crawling for her life as her friends run off without her and don't even notice shes done*
  • Jenna: Mwa ha ha ha ha yes yes, I smell ze blood. Bleh bleh bleh.
  • Mary: I know how to heal a gunshot wound don't call the ambulance just sing a creepy kids song 100 percent success rate
  • Spencer: Haha this is the second time I've been shot in the heart this episode speaking of which where's Toby Wan Kenobi
  • Toby: Dammit Yvonne I told you I told you bitch I didn't want a fucking sandwich and what did u do? U made me eat the fucking sandwich and I lost control of the wheel now we dead
  • Toby: Wonder who bought the house tho
  • Me: *large gulps of wine*

                                                       First Kiss

Request: “!! could you do a au where the reader and ben solo share their first kiss, lots of fluff please? thank uuu !!”

A/N: I’m sorry the title is so generic, I had no idea what else to name it…anyways, this is a ben x reader (i just enjoy it so much); thanks for the request anon and feel free to send more! Please enjoy :) [GIF NOT MINE]

Word Count: 2.3K+

Warning: Like one curse word?


It was quite the sentimental moment for Han and Leia–especially Han. He was about to pass down his life long possession of the Millennium Falcon to his son, believing his time was soon to be up. Of course, Han and Chewie would eventually find ways to go back on their little journeys, but for now, Han had trustfully left the ship in the hands of his son and best friend. “Alright, stay safe…” Han said out loud, only causing Ben to roll his eyes as he hugged his mother goodbye, earning a rather tight hug from her small figure.

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Brother - Jungkook Scenario

Jungkook as your brother

A/N: I was thinking how it would be like to have Jungkook as my younger brother and this his how I see how he will be. 

This is really a sister-brother relationship story(at least how I envision it). So not romantic. Still fluffy tho. Warning: Maybe unnecessarily long dialogues im sorry

Word Count: 3K

“Oh my God.”

Your eyes are the size of saucers. As well as your mouth. Your best friend has the same expression, looking back at you with the same surprised reaction.

The phone in your hand displays the message “Do you wanna go out with me?”

You scream. Your best friend screams. You two hug and jump gleefully in the room, not caring of the papers and clothes on the floor being stepped on.

This is the best moment of your life. Your crush of five months has just asked you to go out with him.

“Oh my God. What do I say?” you squeal, hands shaking as you hold your phone.

“Say yes, stupid! Come on!”

“Okay, okay!”

Calming yourself down, you manage to type “Yeah” and press send. You throw the phone on the bed, squealing once more from disbelief and joy. “I said yes.”

Your best friend’s voice is louder than yours and with your screams combine, it can almost shake the whole house.

A knock on the door comes not seconds after, almost banging the wood open. Your face falls in annoyance. “Sorry, I bet this is-”

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