Summary: You have been with the Avengers for three years and during that time you have developed a close friendship with Bucky. When you discover another woman in Bucky’s room you begin to question what your true feelings for him are.
Author’s Notes: This is probably the last part for this week. Expect Part 14 Monday night. I’ve got to say this is setting up for one of my favorite scenes. Before I even knew how I wanted this story to go I had this all lined out <3. I always love hearing from you guys. I hope you enjoy it! Tags are at the bottom – let me know if you would like to be tagged/untagged. x
“Can I just go with you?” I
asked quietly as Bucky packed his bags hurriedly.
He paused with a small smile, “I wish doll. But Fury was very
direct that I was supposed to come alone.” I responded with a frown and was
about to say something before he cut me off. “Listen, I don’t want to argue – I
don’t want to spend the last few minutes I have with you arguing…” he looked at
me sincerely. “I hate being away from you, but you have to sit out of this
fight… just this once,” he finished as he crossed the room to stand in front of
“Fine – but you better tell Fury that if you come back
looking the way you looked the other day… he’s going to have to deal with me,”
I answered stubbornly. I still wasn’t happy that he was having to leave
immediately after Thanksgiving. He smiled and kissed me.
“Deal—I will see you back in New York.” I couldn’t help but
notice that his smile didn’t reach his eyes nor did he seem thrilled to be
“Come here,” I demanded sweetly as I grabbed his hand and brought him to the bed. “Just a few more minutes.” He smiled at me softly as we sat down on the edge.
“I already miss you,” he murmured into my ear as he pulled away from kissing my cheek.
“Then don’t go,” I added playfully. He sighed heavily as he ran his hands through his hair. I knew he had to go, but it didn’t mean I had to like it. He stood up from the bed and paused to look at me. I blushed violently – it was very early and I was still a complete mess. “What?” I asked shyly.
“You’re just so damn beautiful. Don’t go falling in love with someone while I’m gone,” he replied as he took my hand and pulled me up to stand in front of him. He wrapped his arms around me and rested his head on top of mine for a moment. With a sigh he pulled away and kissed me one last time before he turned to grab his bags and
leave. He hesitated at the door but didn’t turn to look at me. “You know what I
told Natalie the other day… I…. It’s true… I do…” he said quietly. He was out the door
before I could even register the importance of the phrase or reply.
I was incredibly happy
but completely terrified at the same time. This is what I had wanted but now it
made losing him seem so much more of a possibility.
“Earth to Y/N.” Wanda’s voice effectively snapped my
attention back into the car. I had been lost in thought as we departed Clint’s
to head back to the city. Most of the trip had been passed by Wanda talking at
me while I stared out the window thoughtfully and added the occasional yes, no,
or hm. Bucky had left to meet Fury the day before and I had been in a fog ever
since – mainly because I kept replaying what he said before he left.
“He told me he loved me,” I whispered as I watched the
countryside melt into the city. “Well I mean not in that many words… but…”
“That’s amazing!” Wanda
“Why do you sound less than thrilled?” Nat chipped in from
the backseat. I had forgotten she was there and the sound of her voice made me
“I mean… I don’t know… I love him – that’s absolutely
obvious to me, but the prospect of love for people like us… I feel like it’s
thumbing your nose at fate. It’s a strength and a weakness… I feel like loving
someone as an Avenger…. Well it puts them in a very dangerous position…” I
trailed off. My words came out in fragments because my thoughts were in
fragments. I had felt an increasing amount of dread as we left Clint’s to come
back. Everything had felt so natural and perfect there, but now it felt like we
were coming back to reality and with reality came worry.
“I mean Clint has a family and a life outside of being an
Avenger so I think it’s possible, but I understand what you mean,” Nat replied
“Did you say it back?” Wanda
“Say what?” I asked confused
Wanda rolled her eyes. “Did you
tell him you loved him?”
I began to panic a little bit. “Well he didn’t directly say
it and he didn’t give me time to think about what he said or formulate a
response. By the time I opened my mouth to say something he was gone,” I replied
The rest of the drive into the city was mainly in silence. I
rested my head against the cold glass of my window and closed my eyes hoping to
focus on something other than not immediately telling Bucky that I loved him
back. I must have dozed off because I awoke to Wanda shaking my shoulder gently
and telling me we were back. I walked wearily behind the others with my bags in
hand. I was ready to lay down and sleep for a solid week. Something about
resuming the day-to-day always made me feel weary.
I passed Bucky’s room and sighed while continuing down the
hallway. I entered my room and fell face first onto my bed. I was planning a
solid hibernation when F.R.I.D.A.Y.’s voice cut through the silence. “Ma’am –
Sargent Barnes left a message for you late last night. Shall I play it?”
My pulse quickened at the sound of his name. “Go ahead.”
Bucky’s voice filled my room suddenly. “Hey doll, I just
wanted to let you know that I got to D.C. okay – plans have changed. I’m not
sure how long I’ll be out on this one. I’ll try to make it home in time for
Christmas and the gala… I…. I miss you. Bye.” His voice sounded distant and
uneasy which furthered my miserable mood. I was definitely back in the real
world again and for some reason I wished I had never left Clint’s. I squeezed
my pillow to my chest and laid in silence until I finally fell asleep.
Wanda huffed at me impatiently as I stared reluctantly at
the store front. “Well Barnes is planning on being home tomorrow right? It’s
the Gala and Christmas Eve!” She repeated – I hadn’t been really listening to
her. Bucky had been gone for weeks and I hadn’t received so much as a ‘Hey –
not dead’ text since his voicemail he left letting me know he would try to make
it back in time for Christmas and the gala.
“I don’t really know,” I shrugged helplessly. “I haven’t
heard from him since we got back to the city, but I guess it’s better safe than
sorry.” I set my jaw bravely and followed Wanda into the lingerie store. She
had convinced me that I needed to make the gala a night for Bucky to remember,
and for some reason I had consented – either out of sheer exhaustion or the
nervous excitement that kept growing inside of me as the hopeful date of his
arrival drew nearer.
An hour later we
emerged with something that Wanda seemed to think was appropriate. If I had
known how many various shades of red and black lace existed in the universe I
would have never agreed to the outing in the first place. I was still nervous –
I had put off Christmas shopping for Bucky because I had no idea what to get
him. Friend-Bucky had always been easy to shop for, but Boyfriend-Bucky seemed
daunting to shop for. As we walked down the cold city street something caught
my attention in a window display. I stopped midstride and Wanda ran into me
with an audible, “Hey!” I pointed at the wonderfully crafter leather photo
album that was perched between frames showing pictures of happy couples and
“I have an idea for Bucky’s Christmas present,” I said as I
grabbed Wanda’s hand and pulled her behind me into the shop. The shopkeeper
graciously plucked the album from the display and flipped through the pages
“This was one of the last albums my father designed before
he passed. We make all of these by hand you see,” he explained. He was an
older, slight man with rough hands from his years of tinkering. “You know – I
can customize this for you if you want – with your initials or?” He asked
“That would be wonderful! Except it isn’t for me… it’s a
gift for someone. Could you put J.B.B.?” I liked the idea of adding a personal
touch for Bucky.
“Absolutely my dear! Give me one moment please!” He hurried
back to his workbench to complete the task. A few minutes later he came back
with the album wrapped in delicate tissue paper and finished our transaction.
Wanda and I rushed home. I knew exactly what I wanted to do,
but I didn’t have a lot of time to execute the plan. I rushed around the
compound like a half-crazed person and informed everyone that I needed their
favorite pictures of the group or any they liked that they had taken with Bucky.
I saved Steve for last because it was much more than a few group pictures that
I wanted from him.
“Hey Steve,” I said softly as I knocked on his door.
“Come in!” He called back. I walked in to see him sitting on
his bed with a plethora of pictures spread out on the comforter.
“Hey… I was just wondering if you maybe have any pictures
from before the War of Bucky…” I said a little lamely. I was beginning to
wonder if my idea was too mushy or too intrusive after all.
“Yeah! Actually I heard you talking to Sam and I started
going through all the pictures I have…. I think I’ve picked out some of my
favorites… Will these work?” He asked sheepishly as he handed me a rather large
As I flipped through them my face broke into a smile,
“Steve! These are seriously perfect! But… do you think this is too much? Will
he hate it?”
“Y/N it’s perfect. I think he will love it,” he replied
earnestly as he smiled at me.
“Thanks Steve,” I called behind me as I strolled out the
door and back to my room across the hall. I set to work immediately— figuring
out which pictures should go where. I was so lost in the organization that I
lost all sense of time. I couldn’t help but laugh as I looked through all the
photos. There was one of Bucky holding Sam’s leg as he attempted to fly away—Bucky’s
face was red from laughing. Another one was the year that Tony made everyone
wear ugly Christmas Sweaters. He had, of course, made a competition out of it
so everyone looked absolutely ridiculous. Somehow I had convinced Bucky to wear
matching reindeer antlers for our ensemble – he looked absolutely put out as I
laughed beside him. The memories went on and on and every single one of them
made me miss him that much more.
Finally, I finished the book with a heavy sigh and looked up
at my clock –It showed 3 a.m. “Oh shit… I need to go to bed,” I muttered as I
placed the book on my nightstand and slid under my covers. I was trying
desperately to quell the excitement I had about Bucky’s possible return in case
it didn’t happen. I closed my eyes and sighed. I hadn’t realized how tired I
was – thankfully I fell asleep almost immediately.
Tags: (Please let me know if you would like to be tagged/untagged)
If you were an alolan trial captain, what would your trial be? Also since alolan trial captains are supposed to retire when they turn 20, this would be based on what corny age 13-19 would set as a trial
electric type has always been my favorite type so it would probably be like. mareep herding. i fucking love mareep.
Can you provide some examples as to Clone Wars episodes that were completely dedicated to fleshing out characters? I’ve drawn a blank.
Of course! Only because I have an essay to write and I’m procrastinating, as always.
First of all, The Clone Wars’ episode design is really purely distilled. Each episode has a theme - often moral or political in nature - that is explored throughout the episode. It’s always shown at the beginning by some quote, presumably from Yoda:
(The Clone Wars, Season 5 Episode 16: The Lawless)
Oftentimes, the way minor characters are explored in The Clone Wars is by simultaneously exploring these morals and ethical quandaries. Even in episode one (not the pilot, I hate the pilot), we see this with Wolffe and Plo Koon:
(The Clone Wars, season 1 episode 1: Rising Malevolence)
Aww, look at him. So shiny and young and not traumatized. Poor guy went through a lot.
This is an amazing example of how The Clone Wars can spend 25 minutes exploring characters through ideals. (Despite the three- or four-part arcs that happen later in the series.) The clones tell Plo Koon that no one will be coming to save them. “We’re just clones,” they say. “We’re expendable.” To which Master Plo responds, “not to me.” Already, we can see the cynicism and paranoia that Wolffe bears, and not undeservedly. Wolffe may seem like background noise in this first episode, since it deals mainly with setting up the fact that Ahsoka Tano, Jedi Padawan and snip extraordinaire, doesn’t give a damn about orders, and neither does Anakin. But Wolffe’s also one of the slow burn character narratives that we see come to fruition with his PTSD-fueled “betrayal” in “The Lost Commanders” in Star Wars Rebels:
(Star Wars Rebels, Season 2 Episode 2: The Lost Commanders)
Many of my favorites deal with the clones and their feelings about the war and their humanity. My favorites are the episodes devoted to exploring Rex’s sense of duty and honor. There’s “The Deserter” where Cut Lawquane questions whether Rex is truly choosing to fight for the Republic, or whether he is being forced to. It ends with a triumphant, if pensive, ride off into the sunset. Rex has made his choice, but doesn’t begrudge Cut his own:
(The Clone Wars, Season 2 Episode 10: The Deserter)
And that choice is challenged - to the utmost - in the Umbara arc. A trying time for us all… It really, I think, was dealing with the notion of nationalism, of nation versus citizen, and of course, the value of an individual life. And it doesn’t reverse Rex’s view, but it does complicate it. He won’t disobey orders like Hardcase, but he won’t blindly follow them like Dogma, either. He values the lives of his men - “not clones, men.” And that’s kind of the Rex that we’re left with, a Rex that has realized both the value of his honor and his nation, but realizing, also, the value of individuals within that nation. I loved this notion The Clone Wars had of setting up characters representative of two ideas, and having them clash with each other and complicate each other. As a result, we are left with a more sympathetic, complicated Rex:
(The Clone Wars, Season 4 Episode 10: The Carnage of Krell)
And, oh my god, the Padme episodes. We finally got to witness the full strength of her political convictions. Her speeches in the senate? Incredible. Like, seriously, we were dealing with things like deregulation of the banks, hatred and distrust of others in a nation-state at war, and so much more that I didn’t get as a middle schooler but am incredibly appreciative of now. We see that Padme is willing to put herself at risk for her beliefs. We see that she is a member of a powerful coalition in the Senate, including Senator Bail Organa, Senator Mon Mothma, and others - essentially, scenes that were (wrongfully) cut out of Revenge of the Sith.
We watch her deftly maneuver so many political climates; she is fiercely idealistic, but shrewd (see Season 2 Episode 15: “Senate Murders”). She doesn’t struggle with grey morality as so many other characters do. I think the best example of this is her friendship with Mina Bonteri, a Separatist whom she and Ahsoka sneak away to go visit. (The number of times Padme gets involved in espionage is amazing, really.) I really like this episode because it, again, allows one character to complicate another: Padme shows Ahsoka that things aren’t as black and white as she believes, which brings us closer to a more compassionate and mature Ahsoka Tano.
(The Clone Wars, season 3 episode 10: Heroes on Both Sides)
There are, frankly, too many episodes to list in one post that all work on maturing Ahsoka specifically, from “The Academy” to “Padawan Lost” to “A War on Two Fronts.” That’s its own post, to be honest.
Also, shoutout to Ventress’ arc and the incredibly satisfying conclusion in Season 4 Episode 20. We take this despairing, abandoned, angry woman, who honestly has nothing left to her. Not even a family or a culture, after the Nightsisters are wiped out by Dooku. We watch her grow. We watch her moral choices change. We watch her find hope again, and more than that, a sense of self. Not Ventress the assassin, not Ventress the Nightsister, not Ventress the bounty hunter. just Asajj Ventress. And it was finally enough. I loved “Bounty” soooo much.
“Once, I was just like you. But I’m not that person anymore. Now, I have a future.” (The Clone Wars, Season 4 Episode 20: Bounty)
In addition to that, we get episodes that aren’t dedicated to the main cast at all. You’ve got your clone episodes - Season 3 Episodes 1-2, “Clone Cadets” and “ARC Troopers” are two of my favorites (Season 3 was so good to us). You’ve got your Yoda episodes. You’ve got your slow burn mandalore arc, full of Maul-Savage brotherly bonding and Satine’s long, graceful fall from power. You’ve even got episodes exploring Plo Koon, Kit Fisto, and Barriss Offee - characters who really did nothing more than swing a ‘saber in the movies. All of them have a common thread, and that is the notion tying characters to ideals and then complicating them - sometimes to the point of breaking. Having characters-as-symbols can often fail spectacularly, especially if they end up being more symbol than character. But apparently, if you’re The Clone Wars, it works really well.
So, regarding the original post: Star Wars Rebels is seeking to explore characters via their relationships, their desires, their dreams and goals. It’s in direct contrast to The Clone Wars, but it’s a beautiful, intimate approach - if only they’d remember to use it, instead of focusing on Ezra being a petulant angry baby in Season 3.
What got you into Mocs? You do it very well so you must be an old school vet?
Construction has been a hobby of mine since my earliest days. Whether it was Duplo, brick system, technic, or something else entirely, I always enjoyed the building experience. Perhaps it was only natural I would adapt Bionicle into my repertoire. I love to write fiction and create the characters as I envisioned using Bionicle. With this stated, my first MOC was constructed from the parts of Tahu Mata on the way home after I had purchased him. I didn’t even bother to build the official set first. As time progressed, and I obtained more sets and parts, Bionicle grew to be one of my favorite means of artistic expression.
Hi Taylor! My favorite holiday is coming up and I’m sending you so much Christmas cheer and love all the way from Norway ❤️🎄✨! My Christmas tree is decorated and my Christmas enthusiasm is reaching a new level every day! In other words, I’m (almost) all set and I’M SO EXCITED! I hope you’re enjoying the lovely month of December as much as I do! Thank you for always reminding me of how important it is to embrace those moments of happiness and enthusiasm. Love you so much!! ❤️
Lots of Christmas cheer from your buddy, Line
@taylorswift @taylornation #firstupisyourbirthday #YAY #thankyouforbeingyou
I actually think Billy's purpose was to show Oliver that Felicity had moved on, so he could move on. Once that purpose was served, they killed him off. I really see no storyline for Felicity in all of this. Regardless of Olicity. Yet again, like all of this season, they'll brush it off and she'll be comic relief in short skirts like s2 again.
Billys purpose to show OLIVER…
look i love oliver. He is my son. I want him happy and i want him comforted and i want him fucking safe always.
Im not however willing to set every character around him on fire for it. And this is from an outsode.the.story perspective. And guess what, inside the story, oliver isnt willing to set anyone on fire for his own self either. This sint about how it would look if i was inside this tale, living it. This is about how ugly its telling and chosen angles read from the other side of the tv.
If billys purpose was not felicity, any other shade of billis purpose can fuck right off.
Im so tired anon. Im tired and upset. Not angry. Really. Im just so sad. And im also done.
I was on genius(.)com looking for the meaning of broken crown by mumford & sons and it made me think of priest!Killian (bth it takes me almost nothing to think about Take me to church, I'm starving for updates) and I thought about letting you know that I love your fic even if I'll never have the courage to set foot in a church ever again because of it (not that I usually do, if not for the eventual ceremonies or touristic purposes). 😳
Well every author loves to hear that something reminders a reader of their work! :) (and, don’t feel bad - even though I’m Agnostic, I don’t think I could even step foot in a church once a year to even please my mother after writing this story haha)
Interesting that you should mention that song though - it’s one my beta, @ive-always-been-a-pirate brought to my attention in the early days of this fic and I listen to it sometimes while writing it.
TMTC should be returning by the end of January if all my Christmas stuff goes the way I want it!
*doctor looking over my lifeless body*
There is no more we can do to save her. Time of death 3:35pm on December 7th 2016. Cause of death: Yuri on Ice!!! Episode 10.
At funeral: Gaby died the way she lived, loving anime, loving ships, but her ship becoming canon was too much for her. We will always remember her. Please rise for the playing of her favorite song.
CAN YOU HEAR MY HEART BEAT
IM TIRED OF FEELING IM NEVER ENOUGH
I CLOSE MY EYES AND SAY TO MYSELF
THAT MY DREAMS WILL COME TRUE.
THEYRE WILL BE NO MORE DARKNESS
WHEN YOU BELIEVE IN YOURSELF
YOU ARE UNSTOPPABLE
WHERE YOUR DESTINY LIES
DANCING ON YOUR BLADES YOU SET MY HEART ON FIRE!
My grandmother once told me, “Relationships are work, honey, and they aren’t 50/50. Some days when I get up I only feel like giving 10%, then your granddaddy has to give 90% that day. But there is always 100% love.
Leigh Ann Lunsford, Parker Sibling Series Box Set
New Zealand based photographer Rach Stewart’s most recent project showcases the beauty of the sea near her hometown. Armed with her iPhone, Stewart captured long exposure shots that revel in the majestic beauty of its sea.