i watched the whole thing again i hate everything

The Mistress - Chapter 15

Summary: The OC (reader) goes on a walk with Negan and he answers some questions that she has for him. 

Characters: Reader (OC), Negan, Daryl

Notes: I had this up earlier, but then spotted some massive grammar errors on my phone and then decided to take it down and re-post it! Sorry about that. For those that are still reading, thanks for that! Sorry for all the torture I put you guys through. I’m an asshole. I know :( 

Warnings: Swearing

AO3 Link: http://archiveofourown.org/works/9366677/chapters/25947969

Tags: @jasoncrouse @ronweaselz @hiddlesdowneyjr @ali-pennell @melodicdolls @namelesslosers @deepsouth @shanaatjelove11@warriorqueen1991 @caitydestroys @acklesdowneyandhiddles-ohmy@jaylaelizabethw @prettyepiic @negans-dirty-girl @mamaredd123 @jdmsgal@alyisdead @memphisgirl1977@negans-network @freaktesque @cannedpicklenumber1 @karaokke @hughxjackman @jaylaelizabethw @jmackie1983 @jenniegs @amy-2496 @daddy-kink-confirmed @jdmfanfiction@jml509 @nijiru @xnegansgirlx @dontblink94  @crzcorgi  @deadlymistress24  @babyblues915 @fxcking-negan @keithmoonmoon​ @fvshvncvnt  @ask-kakashihatake @esmerhya @carrter5  @that-darn-kid @yellatthetopofyourlungs @wolfgirl1074@ryangoslingstanktop@myheart4ever47@telltheking-cassetoi@xabeautifultragedyx@omgalittlebitofeverything*As always, please let me know if you want to be added to the tags or if you want to be taken off! – I kind of merged my tags to make things easier for me here, if you want to be taken off certain stories, please let me know!*

Keep reading

You’re gonna kiss her, and it’s going to feel perfect. Because she’s the right person for you. You’re gonna love how she tastes like vanilla and fruit. You’re gonna hold onto her hips like it’s the last time you’ll ever touch her, and you never want to let go. You’re gonna love it because she’s your whole world and nothing’s ever mattered more to you than she does right now.

I’m gonna watch you kiss her, and I’m gonna feel like I’m about to throw up right then and there. Because she’s the right person for you and I never meant a thing. I’m gonna hate the taste of blood because I’m biting my lip, trying not to scream - why her? why not me? I’m gonna hold onto the railing next to me, because if I let go, I’ll collapse and I’ll never breathe properly again. I’m gonna fucking hate it because you are everything to me,the universe and the galaxy and the entire solar system, forever and always.


We were together for eight months. My first major relationship since my ex-wife cheated on me in my own house, and the person who picked up the pieces that were left. I have extreme trust issues and a very misanthropic view of people in general and the world as a whole, but she still managed to worm her way in.

That never stopped her from cheating for the entire relationship. I finally had enough of the lying and the betrayal and of my life in general, for a whole buffet of reasons, and I tried to hang myself, which failed. I explained myself while I was in the hospital, and ended things as softly as I could because I honestly felt bad about not being someone she could rely on, and I asked for a few possessions of mine back that she still had. She told me to go fuck myself, and the argument degenerated to this.

Truth be told, I think I hate her. But I don’t know what feels worse, what I lost, or the fact that yet again I had to watch a person I loved become everything that I hate.