i wasn't even trying to be funny

4

Coursers - great at shooting things! …not so great with children

anonymous asked:

Thrift store worker here again. I struggle with depression and I try to not let it affect my customer service. The other day this guy was trying to make me laugh. He really wasn't being funny. He even asks me, "What, are you depressed or something?" None of your business, pal. The customer after him, however, comes up to me and whispers, "Or, maybe you're just not being FUNNY," in a hilarious tone of voice. That, however, DID make me laugh. Bless him.

My Coming Out Story
  • Me: Mom, I have something to tell you. It's pretty serious you may want to sit down.
  • Mom: Okay..
  • Me: This isn't easy for me to tell you and I've been meaning to tell you for a little while now..
  • Mom: *Starts crying*
  • Me: Why are you crying? You don't even know what I'm going to say.
  • Mom: BECAUSE I'M TOO YOUNG TO BE A GRANDMA!
  • Me: ...What?
  • Mom: You're going to tell me you knocked some chicky babe up! and i'm not ready to be a Grandma! HOW COULD YOU BE SO STUPID!
  • Me: Mom! I didn't get a girl pregnant! I'm trying to tell you that I'm Gay!
  • Mom: ...What? ...Well....OH THANK GOD!!!!!! *gives me a hug*
  • She was so relieved that she wasn't going to be a young grandma that she didn't even care I was gay.

you know I am just gonna say this but isn’t it funny that people are accusing eliza of being “sex obsessed” or something and no way this relationship could amount to anything a loving and as meaningful as calzona but they really forget how callie tried to pressure arizona into sex when she was trying to deal with her disability and self-image? really puts it into perspective huh.

THE SIGNS AS LAUGHS
  • Aries: The "I just said something borderline offensive, so I'm just going to laugh to ease the tension" laugh.
  • Taurus: The "I'm really enjoying our conversation and I'm glad that I have the honor of being around your crazy antics" laugh.
  • Gemini: The "I just told the most amazing joke, good job me." laugh.
  • Cancer: The "That really wasn't that funny, but I really need some money so HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!" laugh.
  • Leo: The "HAHWHSHNDHFKDODNDNSKODBWBMGMTNEJDJSNDBDJJ (that wasn't even that funny, but I just have to obnoxiously laugh)" laugh
  • Virgo: The "This embarrassing gossip about Jessica from Middle School is hard to believe, but it's so amazing" laugh.
  • Libra: The "Low-key trying to make you find me more attractive because of my adorable laugh" laugh.
  • Scorpio: The "I may have had too much to drink or I'm just super tired, but for some reason I find every other word you say hilarious" laugh.
  • Sagittarius: The "I have no idea what you just said, but I'm too awkward to ask you to repeat what you said" laugh.
  • Capricorn: The "I can't believe you just said that, so the only appropriate response is strange laughter" laugh.
  • Aquarius: The "I really just blew that joke, but maybe if I laugh other people will too" laugh.
  • Pisces: The "Oops! I just laughed during Aunt Becky's sad story to lighten up the mood again" laugh.
  • Aaron: I thought you weren't ready for a "serious commitment"?
  • Robert: That was me trying to be funny.
  • Aaron: Well, it wasn't.
  • Robert: I know. "Robert puts his foot in it". Shocker. And it was definitely a yes. I've got witnesses.
  • Aaron: Ah, I was on tons of morphine.
  • Robert: So, you're turning me down?
  • Aaron: Well, you have only just got divorced.
  • Robert: I know what I want now.
  • Aaron: Do you? I mean, this is a big deal. You still haven't even got your head round stuff.
  • Robert: I've nearly lost you twice now. I can't do it again. And I would've stayed with you, you know, whatever happened.
  • Aaron: Don't.
  • Robert: You think I want other people? But I promise you, I won't. You're enough. I'm sure, and I love you. So what are we waiting for?
  • Aaron: I'm not exactly easy to love.
  • Robert: Neither am I.
  • Aaron: So how do we not mess this up, then? When it's forever.
  • Robert: I don't want easy. I want messed up. With you. Forever.
  • Aaron: Robert... will you marry me?
  • Robert: Let me think about it. Yes. I will. Course I will.
  • (KISS and hair ruffle)

anonymous asked:

can you do jealous niles headcanons? before and after confessing please ^-^

Before Confessing

  • He really doesn’t get jealous until he realizes he just wants your attention just for the sake of your attention
  • He gets jealous easily but tends to bottle it up- he knows he’s just a bunch of jagged sharp edges that hurts those around only dressed a bit prettier since serving Leo and once in love isn’t sure he’s the best for you
  • Bottled up emotions tend to overflow but Niles is good at covering up his intentions and anxiety so it’s hard to tell if it’s jealousy

After Confessing

  • He tries to be more open about his jealousy, at least after he’s in private with you
  • Even when being upfront plays it off as smoothly as he can, even trying to ‘remind you’ why you chose him
  • Really just wants some cuddles and tender loving care

Dean struggling in the checkout line to keep a hold of his young daughter and the basket because Cas ran back to get something. And the line keeps moving and his daughter keeps grabbing at things. And he’s constantly going ‘no hon.’ 'Put that back’ 'no candy’ all the while scanning for Cas. And by now the people in line around him think its adorable and he totally has an audience.

And then Cas calls to ask about a certain percent of milk and Dean has to manage the phone the basket and their daughter. And now all anybody can hear is his side of the conversation and people are totally listening.

'Cas get whatever you want. No I don’t care. Are you sure there’s a difference? Okay okay no there’s a difference. Get whatever you think is best. Listen are you almost back up here? No yeah I have the bank card. Babe. I need you up here on monster control. Ha ha that wasn’t funny the last time you said it either. Babe. There are three people in front of me. I know you do this all the time. I’m just not as good as you. Babe. Cas.“

And everybody is listening and the couple ahead of him thinks the whole thing is adorable. They keep looking back at him.

And Cas doesn’t make it back and now his daughter is trying to grab everything out of his wallet as he tries to pay one handed. The people behind him aren’t even mad. He’s muttering under his breath to the tune of 'I am going to kill your father’ as she giggles away.

And when Dean finally looks up, bags delicately gripped, he finds Cas standing there with a smile on his face.

anonymous asked:

You have no sources for your beliefs, and it makes you look crazy! I try so hard to understand the catholic faith, but you just make it seem ridiculous. The Catholic Church published the bible? Prove it! Catholicism wasn't invented by men as every other branch? That's funny. We're all children of god, but how can we look to you for information when you don't back any of it up?! (On a less angry note, where in the bible does it say to fast on Fridays? I've been trying to figure out when to fast)

Listen, this is a Catholic tumblr. Just dive into history a bit. Protestantism didn’t even exist until 500 years ago. Do you know what the word protestant even means? You know, I used to be Protestant too. And you know what? It made me angry too to find out truths about Catholicism. Mostly because it meant the religion I made myself wasn’t the faith that Christ had given to man.

This isn’t about being “proud” or being “right”, this is about seeking the truth. Most people that don’t like Catholicism because false rumors. If you want to know what the Catholic Church believes and why (sources included) just look at the Catechism of the Catholic Church. Everything we believe is published publicly, and you can view the Catechism online in all sorts of places.

The truth is absolute and unchanging, because the truth is Christ himself, who is, was, and always will be. I suggest if you are looking for the Church established by Christ, you look for a church that is, was, and always will be too.

Please realize if you are following my tumblr your going to see Catholic posts. I am Catholic, I am Catholic before I am Janelle.

I don’t hate anyone on this blog, anyone is free to follow, but I will speak about the truth at whatever cost. I am what I am because of Christ, and because of the Church. There is no other reason. Before coming into the Church, receiving the Sacraments given to us by Christ, I was a selfish sinner seeking only the pleasures of the world. I’m still a sinner, but I have the help now of Christ, and the help of my brothers and sisters in Christ. Now I seek heaven and heaven alone.

If you don’t like me, don’t like the words that I say just pray for me anon.

The lengths of our love is often measured by how we love those who hate us.

So I just saw Split and holy shit. It’s really good, pretty crazy and even funny in parts. My brain is still trying to process it all because wow. I probably won’t sleep properly tonight tbh. Also James honestly deserves an Oscar for his performance because he was fantastic. Plus I felt you could sympathise with Kevin which was good.

anonymous asked:

I only saw it because I went back on bulletproofhalo's blog to see what day Harry showed up with the anchor, and it was definitely the 11th, so I saw the pics of Louis, which was also the same day, and it one of the pictures he even has his jacket unzipped so you can clearly see his anchor shirt. He wasn't trying to hide the shirt.

Oh this is too funny. That’s definitely the anchor shirt. Things I want to know:

  • Did they actually plan it out before Louis left LA/over facetime?
  • Was it the result of some creepy soulmate fate telepathy thing?
  • Or was it just pure coincidence and Louis simply has way too many nautical themed clothing items?

I hate them.

  • me: mom, how far away is the church at the beach?
  • mom: the hispanic or the american church?
  • me: the american one
  • mom: you didnt't like the hispanic church there?
  • me: nah, they're like the black church here. Very friendly and chatty. They always want to greet you and invite you over. the people the white church just ignore you.
  • me: it's beautiful.

i was late to spanish class today and my teacher asked where i was and i said i was in africa rehabilitating baby lions and the only person that laughed was this kid in the back of the room ok and he wasn’t just laughing he was literally on the floor red in the face chocking back tears

anonymous asked:

I don't even ship EreMika and I can't believe this "platonic" bullshit. Interpretations my ass, you don't try to kiss (and y'all are blind if you say she wasn't leaning in) your siblings (which brings the incest argument crashing down as well) or say you wanna be with them forever. No, really, watching this from the sidelines is funny but even I'm weirded out by the level of delusion these people have. Some people need a reality check ASAP.

People will still call Eremika platonic even if they began undressing each other with their fucking teeth and Eren jackhammers her up against a wall for twenty minutes straight in broad daylight.

2

TOPHSBEIFONGS' FOLLOW FOREVER

Considering I make graphics and edits all the time, I’m too lazy to make a follow forever graphic so I have settled on gifs instead. So, here’s my first follow forever. I’ve had this blog for almost four weeks and I’ve gained 500+ followers already, I don’t know why anyone would follow me, I’m so boring omg. Anyway, thank you all for following me and reblogging my graphics, edits and gifs, even if they give you sad feels.

My top favourites

airbenders | avatar-fangirl | bopalin | forevergirlkataang | forevergirlkorra | korrasane | ladyzukos | pai-shodown | princeszuko 

I also love these blogs 

aangsspirit | adorkablezukoattackonazulaavatarthelastairbendersbbolinn | beitongcloudbabies | feetoph | fiirebender | fire-ferrets | gebbeh | hotshotkorra | kcrra | korrahs | korraava | korrateakorratic| legnedofkorra | linsscars | mako-licious | markofabanishedprince | metalbeifongs | ohmykorra | queenlinbaefong | toplh | zukothefirelords | zuzuthejerkbender 

p.s sorry if i’ve missed anyone out