i was washed away by

lolnopeasant  asked:

I don't know if I'll ever be able to hear "Because of Your Love" by Phil Wickham without feeling great thanks for the Lord. On one of the first nights in my life that I was suicidal, God put that song in my head and saved me. My guilt and self-hatred washed away as I worshipped God that night. I've had harder times since then, especially after discovering my bisexuality and now questioning my gender, but out of all the times God has kept me alive, that one always sticks out most to me.

I love this.

Definitely going to check out that song ❤️❤️

God bless you!

I’m telling myself it’s okay. I loved you with my everything and you just needed something different than I could put together. I’m saying I was a building sandcastles kind of person and you always asked why I bothered when it was going to wash away. I think we did our best. I’m saying I know she’ll be better than me in the end but I tried so hard I broke myself for it. That’s what I’ve been saying to myself, I guess: at least you tried. It’s just that you needed something different.

5

Can you imagine me with those powers, Bae? I could get to redeem myself. I could turn it towards good.

I let a boy tell me what I deserved, and that was the first mistake.
Because when it comes down to it, his words will echo in my head until I believe what he’s saying, even if it isn’t true.
It was a vibrant feeling, the way his hands held mine and the way that my heart beat against his. His words dangled over my head, and every day I tried to capture them from the air. Because there is no feeling like the one when he told me I was beautiful, when he whispered “I think I love you,” like the words surprised him as each one rolled off his lips. And I guess I’m a sucker for being the girl that changes the boy who can’t be changed, being the girl that turns his world from wrong to right. And he made me feel loved when he wept about not wanting to let me go. It made me feel real, it made every word feel palpable. I had changed him, I had turned the boy from stone to life.
But the truth is everybody has their flaws, and every one of his glimmered under the waves, while I tried to avoid them and told myself to just look up at the fucking sky. Look up. Don’t look down. He is perfect, he is beautiful, he is worth your soul and mind.
But they haunted me when my feet dipped into the sand and the shiny rocks pierced my toes. He made me bleed but I tried to let the ocean of him wash it all away. I still smell him on my skin and I get sick at the thought of that lingering scent disappearing, but he told me I was not what I am.
When people saw me for who I am, a strong and genuine person, he cloaked me and covered me and tried to suppress it. He let me believe I didn’t deserve to shine the way I did. He believed I was only meant to shine for him. So I dimmed my light and cut myself up just so he would accept me. He was what I wanted, he was what I needed. I didn’t need the other things, I could sacrifice myself for him. The ocean was too vast and wonderful for me to realize that I was getting bruised and battered under the waves, that his long and careful fingertips ripped my heart apart.
He held me close and told me he wanted me, he told me I was his and he was mine. But every drunken word was laced with fear and jealousy, and I became a consolation prize in the war within himself.
I like to believe I changed this boy, and that our love was epic in every sense of the word. We laughed and we cried and we loved and we loved and we loved. But sometimes the things you love tear you to pieces, and your addictions become your worst enemies.


I let a boy tell me what I deserved, and that was my first mistake.

Birthday Girl (NSFW/Smut)

Originally posted by dailytomholland

Author: Arfrona-and-Marvel

Word Count: 2965

Warnings: Cursing/Sex

Pairings: Peter Parker x Reader

Type: Fluff, Smut

Note: Virgin reader and Peter :) 

Requested: nope

——————

Y/N’s POV

Peter covers my eyes with a blindfold and helps me stand up.

“This is kinky, Parker, what are you planning?”

Peter laughs nervously and I feel him getting more timid with his actions.

“Will you stop, Y/N? It’s just to keep the surprise a surprise.”

I giggle at his obviously flustered state from my sex joke.

I let him lead me out of the room to the unknown destination, one hand holding mine and the other on my waist as he gently pushes me along.

“Peterrrrrrr it’s taking so loooooong,” I whine, just to annoy him.

“Just a little farther, Y/N, bear with me here.”

My foot brushes against something soft.

“Is that another gym sock?”

“Uhhhhh… No it isn’t…” There’s a loud shuffle as he tries to kick the offending article away discreetly.

Oh, he’s so adorable when he’s lying.

He stops and lets go of my hand and waist. There’s a soft scrape to my left as he pulls out a chair.

Heh. Pulls out.

“Here ya go, love.” He takes my hand and gently guides me into the seat. He slips and I miss the seat, landing on the soft, carpeted floor instead. There’s a solid thunk as what sounds like Peter’s head collides with the wall.

“OH MY GOD PETER ARE YOU OKAY?” I tear off the blindfold and see the poor boy rubbing his head, where there’s bound to be a bump forming.

“I’ll live.”

“Oh you poor man-child, let me get you some ice.”

I rush towards the kitchen, noting the very nicely set-up dinner table for two.

He must be devastated that he couldn’t properly surprise me.

I stop as I enter the kitchen, trying to process the scene before me.

He hobbles up behind me, trying to stop me.

“Wait, Y/N, don’t go into the- ah shit you’ve seen it.”

I look around to see the room decorated with strings of lights and roses.

“Oh, Peter. You shouldn-” Peter kisses me before I could finish my sentence.

“You like it?” He asks as he pulls me closer for another kiss, deeper than the last.

I pull away before nodding, “Yes, Peter, I love it. Thank you.”

He beams at me before leading me to the table and pulling out a chair for me.

“My princess,” he jokes, gesturing for me to take a seat.

I sarcastically bow, “My knight.”

—–

After dinner, I stand up to help clean up the dishes.

Peter shoos me away and tells me to sit down while he takes care of it.

I don’t bother arguing with him, because I know fighting with him would be pointless with his stubbornness.

I stay seated while he collects the dishes and kisses my nose before leaving to wash them.

I watch him walk away and smile to myself as I take a rose from the vase on dining table and twirl it in my hands.

I giggle to myself as I think about our past two years together.

How sweet Peter was with his cute pickup lines and our weekly movie dates.

How shy he is when we kiss and how much of a gentleman he is.

I continue to reminisce until I see Peter standing in the doorway.

His cheeks are red and his hands are shaking a little.

He’s nervous.

“Peter, love, are you alright?” I ask.

He gives me a half smile and he walks over slowly, his body language screaming nervousness.

“Peter?”

“I, uh, I have one more gift for you,” he says.

“Peter! This is already so much, please that’s enough,” I laugh and I stand up to hug him.

He hesitates before hugging me back and now I see how nervous he really is.

“Peter? What’s wrong?” I ask, noticing that his legs are shaking.

He looks away from me as he reaches into his pocket and gives me a small index card with the letter V written on it.

Oh.

I look up at him questionably and he rubs the back of his neck, his face slowly acquiring the color of the roses on the table.

“It’s um. I-I, uh,” Peter stumbles.

“I get it Peter, V-Card,” I look up at him and smile before kissing his chin and then his nose.

“It’s a very unique present, Peter,” I say as I lean closer to Peter and kiss him again. He places his hands gently on my hips.

I lean back and smile, “So I can cash this in anytime I want?” I ask.

His face reddens a little before he nods.

“How about right now?” I ask slowly, hoping he would get a hint and suggest something.

He looks at me in the eye for a few moments before breaking contact and looks down at his feet.

“I’ve got another surprise for you, love,” Peter says, reaching over to the counter and giving me the blindfold again.

I look at him suspiciously before putting the blindfold on again.

“Just trust me, Y/N,” Peter says softly. I relax a little and reach out to hold his hand as he leads the way.

I am assaulted with a barrage of smells as we turn into a room, where everything sounds slightly muffled, as if it’s filled with soft furniture. My feet brush against… rose petals? I smell my favorite scented candles as well as… Febreze. Lots of Febreze.

Dammit Parker why don’t you clean this house more often?

His hands leave my shoulders for a few seconds and I hear some shuffling around me, no doubt he’s cleaning up whatever’s been left strewn around his ro-

The blindfold falls off suddenly and I’m left shocked at the scene in front of me.

Though I’ve been in his room a million times before, I’ve never seen it this clea-

Romantic. It’s never been this romantic.

Everything’s been swapped or covered with a red velvet and the lights are off, leaving only the candles to light the room. A gasp  escapes my lips. Peter, who is in the process of furiously trying to shove what looks to be a red and blue suit into the closet, whips his head around, eyes wide open.

“It fell off? Shit, now I can’t badmouth the baddies anymore about their lousy knots… Anyways, surprise?” he tries with a tight smile.

God, he’s so adorable when stuff goes wrong.

“Peter… just ask me…”

“Well, I mean you don’t have to, but… I…” Peter tries to start but fails to finish his sentence as I

lean closer, until our noses are almost touching. We stay that way, looking into each other's’ eyes for a while.

“Hi,” Peter greets me.

“Are you going to kiss me yet?” I ask, slightly impatiently. Face redder, than the cushions, he does just that.

He makes the first move, turning his head and closing the space between us. My lips meet his, agonizingly slowly. His hands cup my face and pull me closer, and I return the kiss with a passion I didn’t know I had. Our lips locked, he pulls us down onto the bed. One of his hands finds its way into my hair while the other one grasps my neck. My own hands find their way under his shirt and around the back of his head. He bites my lip, accidentally, and I jerk back, not expecting the bite.

“Oh my god Y/N I’m so sorry oh my god are you okay oh my god are you bleeding?” he babbles, moving his head around to check my lips.

I quickly run my tongue over my lips to check for blood

“I’m okay, Peter.””

“Hi, okay, Peter, I’m Peter,” he quips back,not missing a beat.

I laugh at Peter lightly before pulling down his pants.

“W-Wait, Y/N, are- are- are you sure ab-”

I cut him off with a finger pressed to his lips.

“Shhhhhh. Yes, Peter. I am sure. Now shut up and let me make you happy,” I say, kissing his nose to reassure him.

“But, I want to make you feel good fir-” Peter tries to object but lets out a moan instead as I palm his member through his boxers.

I smile as I gently squeeze tighter and watch him throw his head back and moan a little louder. I then pull down his boxers as I eagerly snake down his body and watch as his member is freed from its restraints. I wrap my hand around it and give it a small pump, a little intimidated by his size, even though it’s not fully hard yet. I watch as small beads of precum leak from his head and roll down his shaft. Without a second thought, I lick along the underside of his cock, starting from the base all the way to the tip. I swirl my tongue around the head, lapping up the droplets of precum.

I hear Peter groan as I pull him into my mouth, inch by inch, using my tongue to lick him slowly and hollowing my cheeks to suck him deeper.

I smile to myself as I hear Peter curse and moan above me, I feel his hands in my hair as he caresses my face, urging me to continue.

I lean back and pump him a little more before sucking the head of his cock again.

“Fuck, Y/N,” Peter moans as I start to slowly take in as much of him as possible and pull back. The tip of his cock hits the back of my throat as I take him deeper and deeper. I pump his shaft at the base with my free hand as I begin to feel my panties dampening.

“Y/N, please slow down, I don’t want to cum yet,” Peter practically begs.

I look up at him and smile to myself as I let him go with a pop.

He squeezes his eyes shut, trying to calm himself down.

I take this opportunity to turn my back to him and take off my pants slowly. I bend over more than I have to so that I give him a good view of my ass. I can see his jaw drop in the mirror.

Pffft. He ain’t seen nothing yet.

My jeans join the not-so-well-hidden pile of dirty laundry in the corner. I lift my shirt slowly, especially around my chest, since I want him to see that I’ve “forgotten” my bra at home. I hear a sharp intake of breath as he realizes this. The shirt joins my pants and I’m left Stark™-naked except for my panties. I turn around to face him.

Are human even supposed to be that red?

He has a dumbfounded expression on his face that I’ve never seen before.

I laugh a little as I climb back onto the bed and kiss him.

He kisses me back after recovering from his shock. He flips me over so that I’m on my back.

He attacks my neck before traveling downward, past my exposed breasts leaving a trail of kisses past my stomach.

I moan loudly as he reaches my hips. He kisses all along the band of my panties and kisses my nether lips through the thin fabric.

I whimper as he hooks a finger into the elastic of my panties and pulls them down slowly. He leaves small bites on the inside of my thighs as he passes them. Out of the corner of my eye, I see the sodden article of clothing sail across the room in the general direction of the rest of my clothes. He works his way back up my legs, fingers ghosting the insides of my legs before parting them gently. His left hand grip the top of my right thigh as he uses his hand to spread my lips. I clutch the sheets as he dips a finger into my wet and aroused center. He smiles to me before scooting closer to my crotch, all the while making a “come hither” motion with his finger. His lips meet my other lips as his head comes down.

Within moments, his tongue finds my clit.

Has he done this before?

“I pay attention in sex ed, Y/N,” Peter jokes as my cheeks redden in the realization that I had said it out loud.

He chuckles a little bit before leaning in and kissing my thighs before sucking my clit again.

I moan loudly and clutch the sheets harder. I feel another finger join the first and his other hand moves up to hold my hips in place. I squirm and whimper as his tongue runs over my clit, lapping at the sensitive bundle of nerves. His fingers spread my opening  to give his tongue to my core. I shiver as his tongue moves in and out of my entrance.

“Ohh, fuck Peter…” I moan, willing him to go faster. He pulls his tongue out of me and he moves his two fingers again, thrusting faster than before.

His tongue moves back up to my clit and begins attacking the small nub at the top of my folds.

My moans become more incoherent as he continues to lick, suck, and lap at every single part of my most private area, leaving me a babbling mess.

As my walls begin to clench around his fingers, Peter speeds up his thrusting and ravages my clit harder as he feels me gets closer to the edge until he brings me over the edge. My back arches and my toes curl almost painfully as the immense pleasure of the orgasm wracks my body completely. I see stars as my eyes roll back into my head and a loud, breathy moan escapes my lips.

Peter sucks gently on my clit and slows his thrusting as the waves of euphoria roll over me, further intensifying the pleasure and prolonging my orgasm.

As the pleasure gently fades away, Peter kisses my clit, then kisses a trail up my stomach, stopping at my breasts. He licks each nipple, gently sucking on each one before moving on. He stops at my neck, planting a kiss there before moving his head up so that his eyes are level with mine.

“Do you want to go further?”

“No, Peter, I wanted to stop and talk about multi-variable calculus,” I deadpan, lacing as much sarcasm into my voice as possible.

He smiled devilishly and deadpanned right back, “It just so happened that I needed a little help with my calculus homework, can you help me integrate my natural log?”

I whack him softly with one of the red heart pillows on the bed. “I HATE YOU”

“No you don’t,”

He leans down to kiss me again before reaching over and grabbing a condom from the nightstand.

I laugh as he fails to open it before offering to help. He smiles at me gratefully as I put it on for him. I wrap my arms around his neck to pull him closer and kiss him.

I pull him down to the bed.

“I love you,” he whispers.

“I love you too, Peter,” I say as I guide his cock to my entrance.

I always thought I would be really nervous during my first time. But Peter made it comfortable. Peter slowly moved his hips forward and I gasped, not used to his size.

He’s bigger than I thought.

“Are you okay? Am I hurting you?” Peter asked nervously.

“No, it just feels kinda tight,” I say, trying to ease his nerves.

Peter continues to insert himself carefully. The pain fades away and it begins to feel pleasurable.

I moan a little and clutch Peter’s back as I quietly beg him to go faster.

Peter starts to thrust his hips at a moderately faster speed and I throw my head back and moan loudly, enjoying this new feeling beyond words.

Peter leans forward to kiss my neck making me mewl in pleasure as I move my arms around the back of his neck to pull his hair.

I kiss his neck and Peter groans loudly.

“Keep doing that and I am not going to last much longer,” Peter says as he leaves another hickey on my collar bone. He hastens his movements and starts thrusting harder.

“Maybe I don’t want you to,” I whisper breathily.

Peter straightens up and moves a hand down to my clit and rubs his thumb over it in quick, small circles, pushing me over the edge.

“Peter,” I moan before I see stars for the second time that night. As my walls clenched around his member, I felt Peter also reach his release, groaning loudly and burying his cock deep in my tunnel. His cock twitches and I feel the condom fill up as he releases his seed into me. He lies down, burying his face into the crook of my neck as he tries to slow his breathing. We lay like that for a while, both panting hard and coming down from our orgasms. After a few minutes, he pulls out slowly and kisses my face. I moan as he slides out, and I feel empty when he pulls out completely.

“You okay?” Peter asks.

“Mmm,” I respond, exhausted.

Peter laughs and goes to the bathroom to get rid of his condom. I whine, not wanting him to leave, but am too tired to go after him.

Peter comes back a few minutes later with a warm washcloth. He gently moves my legs to clean then before handing me one of his shirts and to wear.

I smile and put it on before lying back down on the bed and drifting off, murmuring, “I love you,” to Peter.

“Happy birthday, Y/N” is the last thing I hear before my reality fades into pleasant nothingness.

—-

Masterlist: x

Work it Out

Bucky x Reader

Summary: after pulling a muscle on a mission, you need to stretch out your leg while working out. But you need help to do so. There’s only one person around to help.

Word Count: 2595 (I got carried away!)

Warnings: language + references to smut + angst

A/N: I have so much unfinished hw and I’m writing a fanfic. honestly I should just drop out I can’t anymore w school. anyway, enjoy 💛


“That bad?” Wanda says, chuckling breathlessly. I shake my head. A familiar pain strikes through my thigh and I wince. Wanda looks at me in concern. “Stop.” she says. I look at her for a moment, almost limping on the treadmill, before pressing the “Stop” button and letting the conveyer belt slow to a halt. She finishes her own as well, wiping the sheet of sweat off her forehead.

“He literally ate his rice with his hands.” I sigh. Wanda raises her eyebrows. “I don’t know when the dating pool shrunk to all the losers.” I shake my head.

“Well, don’t take it out in your workout.” she says. “At least not until your muscle has healed.” I roll my eyes. “Doctor’s orders!” she says impatiently. I stick my tongue out at her and she smiles. “Well, I’m done anyway. Tony organized a dinner.” I tilt my head.

“Tony did something nice? What’s the catch?” I say. She shrugs.

“I think Pepper kinda forced him to. He said something about bonding, and I knew there was no way he had decided to do this on his own account.” I smile, shaking my head. “I’m gonna go clean up. Make sure to be down by seven.” I nod and bid her farewell. “And please take it easy on the workout.” she says, exiting the gym.

I bite my lip and turn around, looking for the next thing to do. After a moment, I decide to work on my combat by the punching bags. I cover my hands first so I don’t hurt myself, then begin punching at the sand bag, grunting with each blow. I use my left leg to kick, keeping use of my right minimal, like my doctor said to. My elbows strike the bag over and over, letting out my pent up anger. My stupid muscle was keeping me from going on the missions. I’m stuck in the compound and the best thing I can do is watch Netflix. I’m dead weight until my leg heals, and there’s no telling when that will be. My mind goes back to the first time I had to sit out on an assignment, five days ago.

We were about to leave for a mission, practically walking out the door as we finished gearing up. It had been a day since my doctor told me I hurt my leg. I was limping slightly, as the pain had turned into a dull ache. I pull on my jacket and look around at my teammates. Everyone is preparing, tucking guns into their jeans, putting in earpieces. I notice Bucky looking at me for a moment, but I don’t give it any notice, because he soon calls Steve over to him. I return to my prep, sliding a small dagger into my boot. I turn around, ready to leave, and nearly crash straight into a chest. My feet stumbled back and my eyes meet Steve’s concerned ones.

“What?” I say, furrowing my eyebrows. He folds his arms and looks down at my leg.

“I think you should maybe sit this one out, Y/N.” he says firmly. I stare at him incredulously.

“What?” I say, shaking my head. “No, I’m fine, Steve. I can handle myself.” He purses his lips.

“And if you can’t?” I tilt my head at him.

“I’m trained, Steve. I can handle a leg.” I say, looking at him stubbornly.

“I can’t risk you getting caught out there. You know they’ll take advantage of any of our weaknesses.” I step back.

“I’m a weakness?” I ask. He shakes his head.

“You know that’s not what I meant. I don’t want you to get hurt.” I exhale sharply, looking around at everyone else. Nat’s lips are pursed, looking at me identically to the way Steve is. Everyone has stopped what they’re doing to tune into the conversation, looking at me like I’m a child. Everyone except Bucky.

“You gotta be kidding me.” I say, setting my gaze on each one of them.

“He’s right, Y/N.” Tony says, his voice muffled by his suit. “It won’t help anyone if your leg acts up and you fall on your ass. That’s bad enough, now add the responsibility of innocents and the threat of HYDRA.” My nose flares, because I know they’re right. I silently throw off my jacket and limp back to the elevator.


“Y/N!” someone yells from behind me. I snap out of my thoughts and stop beating the bag in front of me, turning around. Bucky is standing by the Dumbbells, concern obvious on his face. “Are you alright?” he says. I breathe heavily and look down at my wrapped feet, wondering how long he was calling me for.

“Fine.” I mutter, turning back to the punching bag. I feel his eyes burning into the back of my head and huff. Great, I think, now I can’t concentrate. I straighten my posture and swallow, still knowing that he’s watching me. Ignore, ignore, ignore. I begin punching again, trying to keep from making any grunts of effort. I’m back into a routine, this time not out of anger, but out of genuine focus. I’m in the zone, pretending to deface a HYDRA junkie, making him call for his mom. I get too excited, because I jump up and do a 360, sticking out my leg—my right leg—to kick in midair. My hamstring protests, causing a jolting pierce to run up my leg. I yelp and fall to the ground, landing on my knee. “Shit.” I mutter. From the other side of the gym, I hear something falls and footsteps approach.

“Y/N?” Bucky says. “What’s wrong?” I wince and pull my legs out from underneath me, laying them out,

“Uh, hurt my leg.” I groan. His brows furrow in worry.

“How bad?” he says, his eyes darting around my leg. He sits down on his knees beside me, his hands frozen in the air, unsure of where to go.

“Think I disturbed the healing or something. Doctor kind of expected it to happen, considering I work in combat.” I sigh, the pain not subsiding.

“What can I do?” Bucky says hesitantly. There is already a polite decline leaving my mouth when I cut myself off. Shit. My face visibly shows me cringing at the words I have to say.

“Uh… My doctor said to do an exercise.” I mumble, looking down at my lap.

“What is it?” Bucky says. I sigh and run my hand over my face.

“I have to lie down and keep my legs straight, and, uh, another person has to lift my leg up really slowly and to stop when it starts to hurt. And, um, keep doing that until I can get my leg to a 90 degree angle.“ I breathe. Bucky itches the back of his neck. “You don’t have to—”

“No, it’s fine. I’m not just gonna leave you here.” he says. I keep from gritting my teeth. I kinda wish you would. It would save an incredible amount of awkwardness.

“Um. Ok.” My face turns hot as I lie down on my back with my hands at my sides. Bucky shuffles over, still sitting on the ground.

“Right leg?” he asks. I nod, watching my chest rise and fall. He gets up and leans down, taking my ankle in his hands. My breath nearly hitches at the contrast of his cold metal hand and his humanly warm flesh one. It makes goosebumps rise on my entire body. His eyes meet mine as he stands back up slowly, taking my leg with him. I internally throw profanities at myself for deciding to wear gym shorts. What’s wrong with sweats, huh? “Tell me when it hurts.” Bucky says quietly. I bite down nervously on my bottom lip. He slowly lifts my leg up, the movement of his fingers on my skin making my legs clench, which is infuriating because it makes my thigh hurt. Every move he makes, I can feel it like I’m watching it. But all I can see is my own chest and most of Bucky’s face. He looks right at me, watching for any sign of pain. Once my leg has reached the same height as wear I imagine his belly button would be, I wince and bend my knee for a split second. Bucky re-straightens it, skimming his flesh hand to my kneecap and gently pushing it down. He kneels back to the floor and sets my leg on the ground without letting go of it. He rises again, slowly, making his way back up. My fingers are digging into the mat underneath me, begging for this to be over before I do something stupid. I try to stare up at the ceiling, but it’s so difficult when I know I could be staring to his marble-like eyes instead. And that’s precisely what I do. My leg reaches his chest before the back of my thigh stretches painfully. I narrow my eyes and breathe in sharply.

“Um, it hurts.” I whisper. He stops and proceeds to repeat the protocol, kneeling and rising. The only times my eyes leave his are when they disappear behind my chest, setting my ankle down. The process repeats four more times, dead silence consuming the gym. The only sounds are my erratically beating heart, my murmurs telling him that my leg hurts, and my foot gently touching the floor. On the last time, my leg is nearly there, and when he takes a step closer to me to reach my leg easier, I nearly stop breathing. He’s towering over me, his orbs staring at me softly. He smiles slightly.

“There we go.” he says. I look at my leg and realize that it’s reached the 90 degree angle. I open my mouth, then close it. His hands roam down the back of my shin as he backs up and lays my limb back on the floor, reaching an arm out to help me up. I slowly lift my hand and take his flesh one, letting him haul me off the ground. We’re standing unbearably close, is hand on my forearm.

“Thank you.” I whisper, looking down. He nods his head and slides his hand back the way it came, down my wrist, through my hand, lightly applying pressure on my fingertips before stepping away. I take a long breath in before beginning to walk. I don’t let the breath out until I’ve safely reached my room, locking it and collapsing onto my bed.


I only have about twenty minutes to get ready for dinner, so I take an impossibly quick shower—desperately trying to wash away the tingling on my right leg— and change into a pair of dark skinny jeans and a cream colored blouse. I brush my hair and leave it down to air dry, as I don’t have time to do it. I get out of my room just in time and head down the lounge. It’s modern and sleek with grey couches and smooth wooden floors. On the other end of the room, there’s a mountain of food neatly placed on the board glass dining table. The food is surrounded by empty dinner plates and cutlery. The rest of the team have just made it, talking to one another and taking their seats. I can’t help but smile. As much as I hate to admit it, I don’t blame them for keeping me off the missions. I feel grateful that they care about me enough to put my safety before the given assignment. Nat notices me standing at the entrance of the room and smiles, gesturing for me to approach. I do, greeting everyone in a friendly manner as I take a seat between Sam and Clint, breathing in the sweet scent of fresh food and laying a towel out on my lap. Most of it hasn’t been uncovered yet, still blanketed with a silverware dome. Chatter echoes around the table, but I stay silent, watching the plates being uncovered by outstretched hands, taking in the sight. Rice, ribs, steak, pasta. Every dinner food I can think of is stretched out on the table. I feel someone tap me on the shoulder. I look over to Sam, whose looking at me mischievously. I narrow my eyes. “What?” I ask testingly. He smiles and props his cheek on his knuckles.

“I saw quite the sight earlier.” he says quietly. My eyebrows knit into a confused frown. “I saw you,” he pauses, “gettin’ all touchy with Barnes in the gym.” My eyes widen. I hear an irritating clink behind and look over to see Barton has dropped his glass of champagne. It leaks all over the glass, but no one seems to notice. He’s staring at Sam with his eyes wide. My head whips back to Sam and I give him a deadly glare. He doesn’t even look at me, but instead smiles at Clint.

“You had a thing with Barnes?” he says. I close my eyes at the volume of his voice and nearly off myself right there. The chatter at the table comes to an abrupt halt at the sentence. I’ve never been happier to not have Bucky at the table.

“No,” I croak, “I didn’t.” Tony giggles like a child. My eyes fly open and I look at him testingly. “I didn’t.”

“Then what the hell did I see?” Sam says. I swallow and look down.

“I hurt my leg. He was helping me stretch.” I say quietly. Tony makes an uh-hu and I grit my teeth.

“Stop.” I say. Sam and Tony have childish smirks on their faces that I wish I could punch clean off. Everyone else looks at me with raised eyebrows or widened eyes. “Nothing happened.” I mumble. Sam shrugs.

“Here he comes. We’ll just ask him ourselves.” Tony says. My breathing pattern disorients as I look behind me to see Bucky coming through the hall, shaking out his wet hair like a dog. I want to sink back into my chair and become one with it, completely out of sight and finished with this situation. “Hey, Barnes, what were you doing with Y/N in the gym?” Tony says. I barely look at him, just enough to see his face. He raises an eyebrow.

“Working out?” he says, like its the only possible thing that could’ve happened. I mean, it is. Of course it is. “That’s not what I saw.” Sam says, tilting his head at Bucky. I feel a lump form in my throat as Bucky looks at me in confusion.

“She hurt her thigh. I was helping her stretch.” he says, squinting.

“Mmhhmm.” Tony says. “I bet you help her stretch all the time.” I stiffen, looking around the table. Clint, Sam, and Tony giggle profusely. Steve is tugging at his lips to keep a smile from reaching them. Wanda and Nat look at me in surprise. I breathe in and look down, suddenly disheartened.

“You know what, guys?” I say quietly, standing up and folding the towel on the table. “Have a great dinner.” I push my chair out with the back of my knees. The boys aren’t laughing anymore. The table’s eyes are on me. I shuffle out of the chair and turn around, walking past Bucky, brushing his shoulder and trying not to stare at his concerned face. My feet thump, carrying me back to my room, locking the door and sitting on the end of my bed, a sigh escaping my lips.

anonymous asked:

Number 9+5 with jungkook please:))))))

Prompt request: “Will you be quiet!?” + “I made my baby cry!”

Pairing: Jungkook/Reader

Genre: Hurt/Comfort + Fluff

Summary: Usually, Jungkook finds your loudness an endearing and cute quality. But today is not one of those days. After crashing at Jungkook’s apartment, you wake up to find him studying. Despite trying your best not to disturb him, you still can’t manage to keep quiet.

Word count: 1.5k words


Stretching your arms across the soft fabric of Jungkook’s sheets, you yawned and roused slowly. Last night, you had been studying with your boyfriend when a rainstorm made it too difficult to get home. Graciously, Jungkook had offered you his bed while he slept on the couch–you had only just begun dating and didn’t want to make it awkward.

Still, as you rose from the bed dressed in one of Jungkook’s old t-shirts, you couldn’t help but feel a little too domestic for a budding romance.

As you crept forwards, you landed on a floorboard that creaked loudly, cutting through the peaceful silence of the room. Wincing, you continued on quickly. You opened the door and stepped into the hallway, jumping as the sound of the door ricochetting off the walk echoed through Jungkook’s flat.

“Y/N?” Jungkook called out from somewhere, unseen. “Are you up?”

“Yep!” you chirped, emerging from the hallway. Jungkook was sitting on the couch, laptop perched on top of his thighs and textbooks scattered around him. His hair was messy, ruffled from sleep. You walked up behind Jungkook and pecked the top of his head. “Still studying?”

Jungkook nodded soundlessly, fingers typing furiously as his eyes scanned his textbook at a rapid speed.

Smiling to yourself, you detached yourself from your boyfriend and made your way into the kitchen. “I’m just going to eat something before I head out,” you said as you walked away.

“Sure,” Jungkook responded, sounding preoccupied. Understandably so–midterms were rapidly approaching.

Standing on the tips of your toes, you searched through Jungkook’s cabinets, trying to locate the utensils you needed. The dishes clanked as you retrieved a bowl that was stored higher on the shelves. Next, you rooted through the drawers, trying to find a spoon.

“Sorry, Y/N,” Jungkook began a little apologetically, craning his head to look at you from the living room. “You’re kinda loud, and I just need to focus right now.”

“Oh, of course!” you responded. You placed a finger over your lips. “I’ll be quiet.”

A box of cereal was on the countertop already, pressed flush against the backsplash. It was one of those bland, fibrous ones that was actually healthy. Figures Jungkook would eat that kind of thing. Opening the fridge, you grabbed a carton of milk and poured it into your bowl of cereal. There wasn’t enough milk, so the majority of the cereal remained dry.

Whatever, you weren’t picky.

You tossed the empty carton into the recycling bin, and it collided with the contents already inside. A few cans tumbled to the bottom of the bin, clanging loudly as they went.

“Sorry!” you squeaked, your arms outstretched towards the offending cans uselessly.

“It’s fine,” Jungkook said with a quiet laugh.

You slipped into a seat in front of Jungkook’s small kitchen table. For a shabby apartment–Jungkook was a poor university student–the kitchen was quite nice. The table was nestled into a corner, adjacent to a large window that let in plenty of light. Basking in the morning sun, the sky filled with full, fluffy clouds following the storm, you began to eat your cereal.

Due to the lack of milk, the cereal was quite dry. You munched on the dry grains absentmindedly, staring at the expanse of blue sky in front of you, lined with concrete structures and towering skyscrapers.

You couldn’t hear the sound of Jungkook’s frustrated sighs over your loud crunching.

Eventually, you finished the tasteless bowl of cereal. As you stood up to wash your dishes, your momentum caused the chair to slide backwards. It scraped loudly against the tile floors. Sighing inwardly at yourself, you made your way to the sink.

You turned on the taps and poured soap into the bowl. Scrubbing diligently, you began to hum a song that had been stuck in your head for the past few days, swaying gently to the light melody.

“Will you be quiet!?” Jungkook finally snapped, eyes glaring up from his laptop, gaze piercing into your back.

Your eyes widened, and you turned to face Jungkook. Hurt radiated through you, making your heart sting. “O-oh, sorry,” you replied with a watery smile. “I didn’t notice. Sorry.”

Turning back to the sink, you turned the taps and stopped the flow of water. Biting your lip, you felt hot tears begin to well in your eyes. With your head ducked down, you hurried out the kitchen and back in the direction of the bedroom.

“Y/N…,’ Jungkook called after you, a bit regretfully.

You didn’t hear whatever else Jungkook had to say. Shutting the bedroom door quietly behind you, a few stray tears trailed down your cheeks. Hastily, you wiped them away, cursing at your oversensitivity.

You tried to rationalize with yourself. You knew Jungkook was feeling really stressed lately. Naturally, you were a noisy person, and it was insensitive of you to be so loud while he was studying. Plus, he had been nice enough to let you crash at his apartment even when he was so busy. It made sense for him to be frustrated with you. Still, it didn’t make his words or his tone hurt any less.

The clothes you had worn previously were folded neatly on the foot of the bed. You quickly changed into them, laying Jungkook’s shirt down carefully. As you were attempting to put on your socks, you fell onto the soft bed.

Sitting motionless for a bit, you sniffled quietly and tried to collect yourself.

From behind you, you heard the sound of the doorknob turning. The door creaked as it opened slowly. Jungkook slipped into the room, padding across the floor soundlessly. You lowered your head, avoiding his gaze. You clasped your hands in your lap, opting to look at them instead.

Beside you, the bed dipped as Jungkook sat down tentatively.

“Y/N, I’m sorry,” Jungkook sighed, rubbing his arm nervously. “I didn’t mean to say it like that. I’m just really stressed and I took it out on you.”

You didn’t respond. Biting your lip, you fought back another fresh wave of years.

“Y/N?” Jungkook asked. He slid a hand underneath the curtain of hair that had fallen around your face. Cupping the side of your jaw gently, he raised your head to face him. His mouth opened in surprise when he took in your appearance, forming a small “o.”

Your eyes were ringed with red, framed by wet eyelashes. Your lips were red and swollen from biting, and your chin quivered slightly.

“I made my baby cry!” Jungkook gasped, his eyebrows furrowed. He wiped away a single tear with his thumb. “Y/N, I’m so, so sorry. I’m such an asshole, shit.”

He pulled you into a tight embrace, pressing your face into the crook of his neck protectively. Rubbing gentle circles into your back, he mumbled apologies into the crown of your head.

“I didn’t mean it, okay?” he asked helplessly, taken aback by your uncharacteristic silence. “It was my fault. Sometimes I have a bad temper, but it’s no excuse to make you hurt like this.”

You pulled back, still refusing to meet Jungkook’s gaze. “It’s okay,” you whispered, voice hoarse. “I know I’m too loud.”

“You’re loud, but that’s fine,” Jungkook insisted, holding your hands in his. “You’re super noisy, and you’re always doing something. But it’s cute, and it’s one of the reasons why I love you so much. Without you, my life would be quiet and boring. Being loud isn’t something you should be sorry for.”

“You mean it?” you asked, incredulous. Your eyes widened, finally peering up to meet Jungkook’s.

“What?” Jungkook asked, tilting his head with confusion written all over his face. “Yeah, it’s cute.”

“No, after that,” you said, unable to bite back the smile tugging at your lips.

A furious blush bloomed over Jungkook’s cheeks as he recalled what he said. “U-uh, yeah,” he stuttered, his voice uncertain. This time, it was he who glanced away. “That’s okay, right?”

“Say it again,” you demanded cheekily, grinning fully now. Any hurt had been washed away by Jungkook’s confession.

“I love you,” Jungkook repeated, his blush spreading to his ears. Still, his voice was steady this time, and he looked you in the eye. “So much.”

You laughed joyously, launching yourself into Jungkook’s arms. The both of you fell onto the bed, the mattress creaking underneath you. Jungkook laughed too, arms wrapping around your waist instinctively. Jungkook pressed gentle kisses against your lips, then down your jaw, and finally settled at the bottom of your neck.

Weaving your fingers through Jungkook’s soft hair, you smiled at the boy wrapped around you.

“Now that you’ve said it, you can’t take it back,” you warned Jungkook. “I won’t ever shut up now.”

“Good,” Jungkook grinned, detaching himself from your neck to look at you. He pressed his forehead against yours, eyes fluttering shut. “I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

- Girl in Luv

It’s 3 AM right now. I have to be up in a few hours. But I’d do anything for fluff. Hope you enjoyed this imagine. Send us some more requests! You can check out our prompts page for inspiration. Happy reading~