i was trying to post this for a long time

erza155hasleftthebuilding  asked:

Not to be rude, first off the bat, but how do you do it? How do you have time to analyze and think about the media you consume like that? And second off, why? I'm not trying to be rude, I'm just genuinely amazed that you can engage with something so much, and give such long and thoughtful answers to the questions that people ask you! And third, thank you. I'm really grateful for your blog and I genuinely love everything you post

Not rude at all :)

As for how… I mean, I definitely can’t/don’t do it for all media. I go way more in depth with The Flash and related content than I do with anything else I consume. So part of it is just parcelling down to this one thing and focusing a lot on it.

And part of it is practice - everything gets easier the more you do it. You notice more, pay attention more, your brain finds the analysis routine and starts to do it automatically.

Some of it is just… something I’ve always done. As a function of maladaptive daydreaming, whenever I consume media I’m enjoying, my brain is looking for angles to poke at them for holes or launching points for other ways the story could go (or could have gone). As an early teen, I used to set books aside mid-chapter so I could imagine what might happen next or decide on my own preferred version of it. I got… alarmingly good at picking up on foreshadowing or else predicting some things that were going to happen, sometimes several books ahead when I was reading a series. 

And it definitely does take up time. This is one of my main hobbies though. Work, the pseudo-work that is maintaining life and bills and cleaning etc, spending time with my spouse, spending times with friends and family, and … “this” (which includes writing, blogging, and arguably daydreaming). I mean, I do other stuff, but it’s one of the few things outside of work that I explicitly build in time for as ‘play’. 

I also have a lot of guilt over how much time I spend when I “should” be working and am engaging with fandom, in part because I use it as a way to avoid work when I’m feeling anxious, so that’s something I’m trying to navigate. But my work schedule is ridiculously flexible and almost entirely self-motivated right now, so that balance is hard and I try to create my own structure around it. 

Aaaand, sometimes I go a while without responding? It can take a few hours to write a half-decent meta post, and sometimes I’ll sit for a few days on the ideas and let them come together in the back of my mind before putting them on the page. And then I’ll try to do a lot of responding and work on clearing out my inbox in a short time frame (like yesterday and today).

But… honestly I should probably let more questions slide, sometimes. Blogging eats into writing time. 

But, well, that brings me to : why? Simply put: because I love it. 

Like I said, this is something I’ve sort of always done. And maybe not with such formal analysis, but it comes natural to me anyway. And as a grad student, I’ve learned to communicate my ideas, so that part doesn’t take too much effort (though I’m sure stuff would be more clear if I took more time to edit my posts, but then I’d spend all day on them). And all of this lends itself to why I write fic as well, though that’s also just… if I have stories in my head 24/7, why not communicate them with the world?

And I love teaching. I love sharing ideas and helping people understand things or helping them make connections they might otherwise not. And I love the validation that comes from people enjoying my posts and wanting my opinion - I’m definitely not above the affirmation :D And I enjoy the discussions and debates? I end up learning a lot as well. It all makes me a better storyteller and a better media consumer too.

It also helps that I’m chatty. If I tried to make this answer shorter, it would take 2x as long. Being long-winded makes things easier. My brain works fast, my mouth some days works even faster.

i’m sorry i’ve been so inactive, i want to start again

i’ve been trying to find myself – i’ve thought about it, and i truly miss tumblr (i know some of you are like It’s Not That Deep, but i was scrolling through my dashboard again and i realized how much i missed it). i’m going to start posting again, but this time without thinking about followers or aesthetics or anything. i’m still going to have a pastel anime blog (because i love pastel.. and anime) but i’m getting rid of the one color a month thing because honestly it’s been Exhausting finding colors for one month and setting it in a queue, as dumb as it sounds. i’m excited to be back, and i truly appreciate everyone who has read this far hehe - if you’ve been wondering where i’ve been, mainly twitch and discord; overwatch has been a prominent factor in my life for a while, and twitch as well as discord has been fueling it, but i’m happy to be back on tumblr now


tl;dr i’m officially back, and this time i’m not going to pay attention to aesthetics (i’ll still be an anime blog, but i’m going to be posting what i like)

anonymous asked:

I’m so sorry if this has already been asked but... how do you respond to compliments positively instead of denying it? I’ve been trying to say “thank you” more, but that gets repetitive and I just wanna remind everyone how shitty I am

what’s helped me is asking this question to myself whenever i want to respond to praise negatively:

“how does this help me?”

because pretty much all the time, it doesn’t. if someone is giving you a real bonafide genuine compliment, denying it does two things. 1. make them feel sad for you 2. doesn’t actually make them believe that you’re shitty

because to them, you denying the compliment is you underestimating yourself. they’ll still believe their praise regardless, they’ll just feel sorry for you. they’ll feel bad, you’ll think you’re the worst for making them have to feel bad for you, the cycle continues.

when accepting compliments positively, it’s a process before you start to believe them. if someone says something nice to you, sometimes you have to grit your teeth and show appreciation, not refusal.

and appreciation doesn’t necessarily have to just be “thank you.” you can talk about the thing that they complimented you for and make it into a convo! 

like.

“your art looks so nice!”

instead of saying “no it’s nottt. it looks gross.” i say.

“thank you! i’ve been doing my style a bit different recently and trying to incorporate a better use of palettes, and practicing on drawing heads smaller to better proportion to the body. i’ve been drawing a lot of fantasy recently and have been really enjoying it. do you like fantasy?”

how has this conversation helped me instead of denying it? 

it showed confidence. it showed i was practicing and trying to improve. it showed i was experimenting, so the other person knows how much the compliment meant to me. it drew the other person into a convo we can both talk about.

if you spend all your time telling people how shitty you are, you’ll believe it more and more, and you’ll start to associate compliments with feeling bad about yourself. it’s an unhealthy mentality, and it does not help you in living your life.

Inazuma Eleven Fandom Meme

Get to know me Inazuma fandom version!

How long have you been a fan of Inazuma Eleven? 

I don’t really remember… maybe in the far 2010/2011, I was ten/eleven years old?!? (My God, how fast the time passes…) 

How did you find out about Inazuma Eleven?

Thanks to my sister, that she watching tv and changing channel we came across an episode of Inazuma Eleven, and there was Kazemaru/Someoka (I don’t remember) who slamming against the door post. It was really painful but equally fun, I don’t really know why (maybe because my sister and I find it all fun). And nothing, since that day we fall in love Inazuma Eleven and we watched all episodes. ♥

Favourite IE Character(s)

(I really love every character, I can’t sign everyone…) (and anyway I done the Inktober with all my favorites :3 )
Aphrodi, Kazemaru, Nagumo, Sakuma, Atsuya, Midorikawa, Tsunami, Someoka, Fudou… 

Favourite IEGO Character(s)

Gamma ♥, Alpha, Beta, Zanark, Taiyou, Hakuryuu, Fei, Kariya, Tsurugi, Yuuichi, Midori (yes, she the one girl that I like, perhaps… ah, also Kinako!), Ryoma, Ibuki…

Least Favourite Character(s)

Toramaru, Hiroto (Tatsuya), Ichinose, Aki, Touko

Favourite OTP and ships?

- Inazuma Eleven: Endou x Kazemaru, Someoka x Fubuki, Kidou x Sakuma, Nagumo x Suzuno, (Nagumo x Aphrodi x Suzuno)

- Inazuma Eleven Go: (ehm, there are some weird otp that I invented…pls don’t judge me) Gamma x Zanark, Hakuryuu x Tsurugi, Ryoma x Zanark, Ryoma x Midori…

mmmh I think I stop here ahah ^^’

Favourite BROTP?

Sakuma Kidou and Fudou (penguin powah), Tsunami and Tachimukai, Tenma and Fei, Alpha Beta and Gamma (mygod this trio), Aphrodi and Gouenji, Kariya and Kirino…

If you were in a team of your choosing, which school?

I’m really undecided between Teikoku Gakuen and Zeus Junior High, but in the end I’ll choose Eisei Gakuen ahahah

What position would you be playing?

Pointing out that I didn’t play football and I don’t really like to play, I sometimes played at school and I was the goalkeeper (I was not bad, I mean.. I took all the balls with any part of my body aAaaHh) But I think I’ll play as defender!

Favourite hissatsu move(s)?

- Inazuma Eleven: All Aphrodi’s Hissatsu ? God Knows, Heaven’s Time, God Break, Chaos Break is my absolute favorite! Atomic Flare, Fuujin no Mai, The Hurricane.
- Inazuma Eleven: Go hissatsu: Shoot Command 13 (Gamma Strike), Shoot Command 24 (Omega Attack)(and THIS is my favorite for the Go’s serie), Fire Tornado TC, Disaster Break, Great Max na Ore (sUUUUPAAAH), Kiku Ichimonji.

Favourite Season?

For Inazuma Eleven I prefer Aliea Arc and for the Go’s series (Even if I didn’t finish to watch Galaxy) but I loved the Chrono Stone so much!

Favourite Episode?

Uuuuuh my God, I think Episode 55, 65, 103 ( and for the Go Episodes 18, 20-21 and 43 ♥♥♥

What does Inazuma Eleven mean to you?

It means a lot to me! I don’t like football/sakka and thanks to the Inazuma Eleven I started to appreciate it!
In this amazing anime there are characters of all kinds and I love this, the diversity!
And thanks, again, to Inazuma Eleven I met some amazing people ! 

Do you contribute to the fandom? (Graphics/Gifs/Writing/Art/ Supporter)

I draw. Draw is my life. And I love draw my babies of Inazuma Eleven! 
I hope you enjoy what I do! (〃∀〃)ゞ

Recommend some of your favourite Inazuma Eleven blog

@ichiroutas-other-eye @aishakami @iuniu @markofu @inazuma-eleven-translations @ygreczed @linabigface @vraberika @inazuma-eleven-translations @zafiro-satoshi @shawn-and-aiden-frost-9 @inazumatrash and everybody who follows me, I love you sooooo much! ♥♥♥ (っ´▽`)っ

anonymous asked:

Would you pls., post some artwork of witches at all? Or does that not seem fitting to you for your blog? Maybe consider it...? No pressure or anything.

I’ll soon post some artworks with witches, no problem (and with other details without witches)! 

I’ve been quite busy so I’ve not been on tumblr for a long time but I’m happy to say I’m back ! I’ll try to post  in the next few weeks (or this week-end). 

I hope you are all doing well and welcome to all the new followers :) Thank you all ! 

Yugyeom GOT7 Single Dad AU FF 8/?

A/N~It been so long. I’m so sorry. I have been trying to post for a while, but I have been trying to post for a while, but I never got to, because of timing. I hope you enjoy this chapter. Thank you for reading!💞

Y/N left later on that night taking Yugyeom’s hopes for love with her. Laying upon his mattress next to an abandoned pillow he drifted to sleep. He dreamed about his wife and his original life until he woke. His dreams has turned into nightmares. Puzzled his thought till morning. His nightmares were his reality. Waking up he massaged the dark circles that cornered his eyes. Because Y/N was planning to take Mathew out Yugyeom had to take his son to work with him. He got dressed in a bottom down, and strolled out of his home his son not far behind. “Daddy. How will Y/N come to play if I’m at your work?” Yugyeom sighed and spoke softly to his son. “I am sending her my work address so she can pick you up at my lunch break. The car was silent only disturbed with the rattle of loose pipes. When Yugyeom arrived at work he walked nervously toward his bosses office. While Yugyeom had inches on the man Yugyeom felt so small. "Hello.. um Mr.Petterson! My son is with me tonight, but he won’t be any trouble I promise!” The suprising short man was overtaken with anger. “Yugyeom I don’t have time for your son, and yes I know it’s a hard time with not having a wife and all, but if you need the money so bad you need to act like it. I don’t need your son cutting into production.” Alhough Mr.Petterson didn’t say Mathew could stay at work he didn’t say he couldn’t. As Yugyeom exited the large office, his hands shook out of terror. He hated interacting with his boss.

Working hard throughout the beginning of the day Yugyeom couldn’t wait for his lunch break. When the clock turned to 12:30 Yugyeom grabbed his jacket quickly. He didn’t want Y/N to have to come into his work. He didn’t want Y/N to see him at work. He grew embarrassed just thinking about it. While he headed for the entrance he heard a familiar laugh. “Hahah. Thank you! I think I found him!” He was too late. Yugyeom’s eyes connected with Y/N’s and she started toward him and Mathew. “…Hi Yugyeom. You look nice today. And Mathew how cute I love your hat!” He watched as his son grinned from ear to ear. He waved politely and thanked Y/N for the compliment watching Y/N leave while she carried Mathew on her hip.

When Yugyeom returned to his station he tried to regain his focus, but how could he when he had so many eyes following him. He attempted to shake off the looks and rude comments, but he could barely get a hold of himself. “Who does he think he is? Doesn’t Y/N know he’s the lowest rank at the company next to the janitors? Is he dating her how could he manage that?”

While Yugyeom was stalked all day long he wasn’t alone. The press followed Y/N and Mathew all day long. They created headlines, and took multiple photos. Soon Yugyeom,along with Mathew, and Y/N would not only have the eyes of his coworkers watching him, but Millions of fans.

7

Petition to give this poor mugboi a break. 

I had to scribble out these dorks because everything about this game makes me so happy and bubbly inside!! Also, the fact that Cuphead carries around moonshine liquor in his cup kills me. 

i’ve been wanting to do FE x animal crossing for years and it has happened at last dkjfldf

also have some variants!

thanks for inviting me to the party. if you need me, i’ll be in the corner, drinking & trying not to make eye contact
6

Not time for you I need money-

A doodle-comic I did back in January/February to kill time based in that day when the fUCKING MONOMONO MACHINE GAVE ME EVERYTHING EXCEPT SOMETHING FOR THE CHARACTER I WANTED TO TALK TO SO I ANGRILY  HAD TO REPEATEDLY GO BACK,DESTROY STUFF FOR MORE COINS,TRY AGAIN—- (Btw, Rantarou was in the closest room I could get coins in so I would visit him a lot…)

Propably someone posted something like this already but as I was cleaning folders I saw the files there and decided to save them here since I can’t take the pictures with me at the moment- 

Guess who I drew!! Again!! Because I love her!!!!!

this is a long, heavy post, but ive wanted to make it for a while. i hope if you or someone you know has been in an abusive situation, it may help.

when you are abused, the true ramifications of this abuse do not manifest themselves until you are much older.

when you are abused (in any form) as a young person, your first gut instinct will be to turn down therapy/counselling. you might do this because you do not feel you need it, or you do not want to talk about what happened. you need to push past this.

when we experience abuse as young people, we may feel like it was ‘no big deal’. we may compare ourselves to other victims and feel that we are not as bad as them, so that means we are okay. you may feel okay. you may be a young person reading this right now, thinking ‘well, i feel okay.’

i know you do. we all feel like that we’re younger.

you will get older and your untreated abuse will manifest in your life, your body and your emotions. you may develop terrible habits. your body may start to react in strange ways. you may have to struggle with seemingly unexplained bouts of nausea and vomiting as a reaction to ‘normal’ events that have connections to your abuse. you may develop mental health issues and will not understand why. you may grow angry and withdrawn, or deeply depressed for seemingly no reason.

then on one terrible night, you will connect the dots and realise that although you felt invincible as a young person, your abuse affected you.

if therapy is offered to you or you can find it, go to it. abuse does not go away or magically resolve itself. no amount of pretending you are okay will take away what happened. it may hurt to revisit our old wounds, but it is the only way to heal.

it is never to late to heal. if you are an adult who refused therapy and you are struggling, get yourself there, find help, and heal. and if you are a young person reading this, please strongly consider therapy, even if you do not feel you need it.

even if you feel like your abuse did not affect you, let people in. give yourself the chance to heal. do not let your abuser take even more of your life than they already have.

let yourself heal.

10

hannibal + @screenshotsofdespair (1/?)

Stop Tumblr Culture

I’ve been on this hellsite for six whole years. Lemme tell you some things you should know, and things I’ve learned to ignore over the years.

  • Don’t let tumblr dot fuck make staying inside 24/7 and not talking to anyone seem cool. This bullshit has been around for a VERY long time on the website. When I was 13-14, I thought I was doing something wrong by not wanting to stay in my room all day, and attempting to be social. That is WRONG. Introvert or not, staying alone in your room, slumped over and mindlessly scrolling, or watching videos until your eyes hurt is NOT the kind of behavior that should be encouraged.
  • Don’t be a snarky asshole. You see this bullshit all the time; someone trying to be positive, and some edgelord dragging them down. Don’t be that person.
  • Factcheck. I see people making posts (mostly political) about some crazy bullshit that never even happened. It takes .5 seconds to google something to see if it’s fake or not.
  • Don’t cling onto anyone who labels themselves a ‘fandom mom/dad/parent’ They will manipulate you to do their bidding like some stupid minions. On this note; do not let yourself be recruited by ANYONE. Make your own decisions. 
  • If you like something, you like something. Cringe culture is everywhere, but as long as you mind your own business, don’t hurt anyone, and don’t try to force your interests on others, you’re golden.
  • Fiction does NOT equal reality. A lot of people on here are trying to convince people that fiction affects reality. This is just…fucking stupid on a lot of levels. 
  • Try to better yourself. Too many people on here make ‘relatable’ posts about depression, BPD, etc. Just because you have bad habits, doesn’t mean you should keep them. If you are able to, see a professional, get help, go on meds–whatever you can do.
  • Don’t tell people to kill themselves. I can’t believe this made it onto the list, but yeah. These phrases are just SOME of the many. Don’t be a fucking asshole. “Pee your pants” “Run in front of a bus” “Choke” “Delete yourself”
  • Not everything is black and white. This has become a very big issue on here as of lately. Either you’re one extreme, or the other. This person is either good, or bad. This is not how things work. Amazingly enough, not all republicans are racist trump supporters, and not all democrats are bernie bros. There are assholes everywhere, and your side isn’t inherently good or bad just because of the examples the extremists bring up. A lot of the time, the minorities of sides are the ones with the biggest mouths.
6

But why did no one tell us? Why did no one think to warn us?
         but Child, if we all knew, do you think there’d be any heroes left in the world?

CONFESSIONS WITH ACHILLES || J.P (VIA PENCAP