i was thinking jim

Return - Part 2 (Jim Kirk)

Part 1

Summary: takes place during sequences of star trek beyond; the last few years of episodic space travel have been taxing on jim as his heart remains with you and the abronath remains with him. a trade-off is imminent, however, when he spots you and someone else spots the artifact. (series following loot; no real reason to read it, though)

Warnings: language, lil angsty

A/N: i’m still taggin’ those i used to tag for loot, tell me if you want me to take y’all off the list. extended author’s note at the bottom

You slid onto the booth bench without so much as a greeting to the man that sat before you. You took the drink he was nursing and offered him a small scowl prior to tipping the glass back and draining it of its contents. You both knew a pleasant, emotional greeting was unnecessary.

You scowled deeper and sighed at the burning in your throat. You placed your hand flat on your chest and sighed. “That’s not my drink. Why would you order that?”

“Because it’s my drink,” he told you in a voice that rivaled your own in terms of irritation and a grimace that rivaled yours in terms of depth. You could have smiled at his Southern drawl, though. It still reminded you of warm peach cobbler.

Leonard then gave you a once over and seemed to be dissatisfied with what he saw. “You looked good a few days ago. What happened?”

“Oh, I’ve just been in a bit of a tizzy seeing as we spoke three days ago and you didn’t think to tell me the Enterprise would be docking here.” You cleared your throat and sat back, your head lolling against the cushion behind you. You frowned. “Didn’t even give me a chance to leave the planet.”

“Ain’t allowed to leave the planet while on parole— even I know that.” His scowl was slowly shifting into a half-smile that touched his eyes as if the largest grin. “Besides, Yorktown ain’t so bad once you stop thinkin’ about how a crack in the glass could kill us all— you’re lucky to be here.”

You hummed, smiling at the bartender that set your usual drink before you. Your polite smile turned to a rueful one as you swirled your fingertip over the rim of your glass and sighed. “Anything’s better than a jail cell.”

“Try livin’ on the Enterprise for three years.”

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replied to 

Is it true that Jim Sterling/Jimquisition admitted…

God, even that admission about DmC is so half-assed. There’s a lot more than some minor issues with the game, above and beyond related stuff like the design choices and that “old Devil May Cry was for the gays” presentation. Honestly, what made people like Jim Sterling defend this crap in the first place? Just to be purposely contrarian?

yes. that’s exactly why I specifically think Jim Sterling defended DmC so hard. besides all his journo friends lining up to suck it off. Jim Sterling often waits to see where the wind blows to be strategically contrarian, sing praises or move to attack a game/company with his hordes of idiot fans (like with those dumbasses that sued him or No Man’s Sky)

really, there’s some reasons I’m thinking of that people like that defended it.

for one thing, the game was being made by a UK based dev. it had a western story free of that Filthy Japanese Shit that seems entirely anathema to game journalists. nevermind that it was a cynical, sexist, and overwhelmingly stupid slapping together of the Slurm episode from Futurama, Anonymous video announcements/Project Chanology esque resistance of a dystopic government, They Live and some of the most generic “GOVERNMENT, BIG CORPORATIONS AND BANKS ARE BAAAAAAAAAAAD MAN. THINK FOR YOURSELF” dross i’ve ever seen. Like, DMC3 and 1 had very functional, understandable, and even GOOD stories. DMC3 is probably actually one of the best stories for a stylish action game I’ve seen that isn’t Bayonetta 2. because everyone has a character arc, and they don’t overexplain the antagonists or try to make them TOO sympathetic. (that’s something DmC is particularly guilty of)

another thing is: DmC is Very Easy compared to every single “Actual” DMC game. it’s compared to DMC2 in terms of difficulty, which is bad for a series known for difficulty. do you know how I completed DMC2, my very first DMC game? I finished it in one weekend where I was completely blackout drunk. that is not a positive testament to any skill level needed or skill ceiling. in any other DMC game besides 2, you need to actually vary up your attacks to a good extent to get S or above in style. in DmC? I’ve gotten SSS ranks in literally 3 attacks by abusing Demon Dodge and smashing dudes with the Axe or the Fist Demon Weapons. there are videos floating around of people killing the Slurm Queen in three hits, getting an SSS rank. like, I get it. first few times I get through DMC3 with a C or B rank on the levels, I feel like a chump. that feeling sucks tbh. for most people playing these games, this motivates them to get better. game journalists though, they just frequently feel it’s too hard if it doesn’t hold their hand while they do their “finish the main campaign only and judge on that” pump and dump.

another aspect is i think they thought that the fans of the type of games like DMC are really a niche audience, so they can just ignore them in appealing to the lowest common denominator general audience. they really like to promote things that Try To Appeal To The General Gaming Audience (that doesn’t actually exist). like, think of how they were wowed by ME3 having far better shooting mechanics than ME2 or 1, while ignoring the misgivings about them gutting the morality system into glorified QTEs or absolutely assassinating EVERY SINGLE BIT OF CHARACTERIZATION. which is bad in a STORY BASED RPG SERIES. so I think they figured they could see DmC to General Gaming Audiences that only really exist in their head.

then DmC flopped.

it absolutely, utterly flopped. Capcom expected to move 2 million units of DmC. and it didn’t.

it sold like shit in America, Japan didn’t buy it at all, and it had an initially ok showing in the UK before it completely divebombed in sales.

they slashed their estimates on the sales. in the end, DmC sold LESS than DMC4. the original. in 2008.

in surveys conducted by Capcom and Ninja Theory, they found that a sizable majority of the people that DID buy the games actually played a DMC game before. so the core audience that Ninja Theory’s director and the game journalists defending him seemed to go out of their way to alienate were the only ones supporting this terrible title.

I can definitely see why it flopped, because it’s a very unpleasant, repelling game. DMC1, 3, 4 and even /2/ end on a fairly hopeful note, with Dante either about to take another job, either having made or strengthening his relationship with his female companion(s) (renaming his shop optional), or someone hinted to be him driving up to his shop on a motorcycle, the implication being that Dante finally escaped the Hell he volunteered to strand himself in as a suicide mission. DmC is an ending where….the world’s…..saved….I guess? but there’s demons openly roaming the streets. some of them openly attacking people. but hey look there’s military choppers so everything’s fine-…..wait. wasn’t the government BAD and controlled by Mundus??? Donte is entirely miserable as he walks off with Kat and Vergin’s skulking off after damn near getting wasted by Donte. what the FUCK kinda ending is that?

anyway, my final point here is that the people that defended DmC that don’t have the speck of awareness that Jim Sterling has will never forgive The Gaming Audience ™ for not buying DmC because they went to bat so hard. Part of this is ego, and the other part is fear. Their ego can’t take this starkly laid out lack of influence they have with gamers, and they fear that they’re becoming increasingly irrelevant, being completely outmoded by streamers, youtubers, and other guys that yell at video games in videos. 

imagine spock going back to vulcan to be honored with an award for scientific excellency or whatever

and even though its an award ceremony its still very solemn theres no clapping or cheering when people come on stage

finally its spocks turn and as he bows to the high priest and straightens up to receive his medal he hears a REALLY LOUD whistle from the audience

and he turns around and jims in the middle of all these stone faced vulcans like

Guys I know we’re all excited about Mark bringing back the egos but pause for a minute and think about how Chica must be feeling.

She has like 10 dads now she must be so excited.

  • Draco, talking to pansy: I haven't heard anything, but I bet Harry got the job. I mean, why wouldn't he? He's totally qualified and smart; everyone loves him. And... if he never comes back again, that's okay. We're friends now and I'm sure we'll stay friends. We just... we never got the timing right, you know? He shot me down, and then I did the same to him. But you know what? It's okay, I'm totally fine. Everything's going to be totally--
  • Harry: Draco! [looks at pansy] Er-Sorry. Um, are you free for dinner tonight?
  • Draco: ...Yes.
  • Harry: Alright, then... it's a date.[grins sheepishly and leaves]
  • Draco: [looking so happy he's about to cry] I'm sorry, what was the question?
You were about to make a medical comment, Jim?

So, I was thinking about what a goddamn badass Leonard McCoy is.

Actually, I was thinking about drug shortages. I am a resident in the United States. The United States of America. First world medicine, folks. And sometimes - all too frequently - I have to revise the treatment plan of a healthy patient undergoing elective surgery because I do not have access to the ideal drug.

In other words, I compromise.

That’s a sickening feeling, friends. 

Which brings me back to Bones.

Bones, Chief Medical Officer on a five year mission in deep space, where no man has gone before. Bones, who cares so goddamn deeply. Bones, desperately filing requisition forms for medications that he has no hope of receiving in the foreseeable future. Bones, elbow deep in a unfortunate ensign that caught the wrong end of a blast in engineering, sweat dripping in his eyes, nagging thoughts of, “is his name Jason or Joseph?” Bones, mad as hell because medical takes another budget cut. Bones praying frantically to a god he doesn’t believe in, “oh, please, not again.” Bones, eyeballing a unknown species and making a quick judgment call, based on a hasty heart rate estimate and an eyeballed weight, the effective loading dose of a - probably - renal toxic drug. Bones, hissing at Spock to shut the hell up, all the while making his own calculations. Bones, who years after the mission has ended, bolts up out of a dead sleep in a panic of adrenaline, because endless nights of call have made gentle awakenings impossible. Bones, staring dumbstruck at Starfleet Medical’s supply rooms. Bones, dedicatedly carting his tiny medkit on his hip, facing an alien world with a tricorder and a few hypos. Bones, hiding in his quarters for days, pouring over all of the federation’s published xenophysiology records, searching for a connection, wondering where it went wrong. Bones replaying the day’s scene in his mind, fear still gripping his chest as Jim sleeps peacefully in the biobed. Bones alone in the field, performing a bilateral finger thoracostomy on a blue-lipped yeoman who reminds him a little too much of Joanna (if somebody does not write this fic, I will). Bones, fresh out of med school, feverently murmuring his oath with conviction and wide-eyed naivety. Bones blaming himself. Bones bitching about the unpredictability of genetically modified antimicrobials. Bones needing a goddamn drink. Bones, contemplating the nuances of therapeutic nihilism. Bones, forcing himself to meet Jim’s eyes as Jim officiates a funeral. Bones, calculating pharmacokinetics in his head. Bones, knowing there was nothing to be done, but dammit, what if? Bones, painstakingly documenting his every discovery, every treatment plan, every failure and every triumph, for the next generation of medical professionals. Bones in his office with his head in his hands. Bones, absolutely giddy and shaking with relief, “Don’t be so melodramatic; you were barely dead.”

Practicing medicine is terrifying. Every day, I am horrified at the thought that I will not be able to provide for my patients. I love my field with every breath in my body, but the responsibility is overwhelming, and sobering.

Disease and danger, indeed.

“By golly, Jim, I’m beginning to think I can cure a rainy day.

Yeah, Leonard McCoy. I think you can.

concept: since jim and spock are used to different temperatures in their quarters, when they start living together, they settle on a compromise (not too cold for spock and not too hot for jim) - but they also start a game with betting each other “thermostat points”
one point means the winner can change the temperature by 0.1 degrees
this results in saying things like “i bet you 4 thermostat points i can climb that rock”, or “50 thermostat points say the next peaceful mission will result in a disaster as usual”

I think Jim Carrey is an alternate universe Adam Sandler, reincarnated and sent back to our time to live out his professional life more gracefully and properly.

Think about it. They’re both very recognizable character actors who both have very strong personalities. When you cast Jim Carrey or Adam Sandler in a movie, you’re not casting them to be a character, you’re casting them to be themselves while reading your script.

Where they diverge, however, is while Adam Sandler has kept playing out his tired career as a wacky voiced loud-mouthed comedian actor, Jim Carrey saw that he was become less relevant near the turn of the century. He’s become more quiet, and more toned down. He aged gracefully, while Adam is still trying to do what he’s done through his whole career.


We are the Mirrorverse


OKAY okay okay but I really really want Season 2 to start with like… a three year time-skip, where Jim returns changed, and finding everyone else changed (and pissed off at him for like all those three years), and when he returns he accidentally (?) releases the Gumm-Gumms from the Darklands, and has to make up with his friends/family while helping (?) defeat the Gumm Gumms. I also want each episode to start and/or end with like a 2-5 minute segment of Jim’s time in the Darklands, starting from when he first arrived, so at the beginning of the season we have no freaking clue what happened to him or what happened there, and by the end of the season we can piece together the events and we’ll know. 

Also i assume there’s no human hair salons in the Darklands and i can only assume he’d give up trying to keep up ‘appearances’ after a while so like… yeah. Long haired Jim? Long haired Jim…