i was stressing over what i would do for a picture and then i though

anonymous asked:

I can tell you've been through a bad breakup, what did your ex do for you to leave him? I've been following you for years and you're always so positive so I hate to see you down..

Our last encounter he locked me in a room for two hours and verbally abused me, damaged my shit, threw my phone and fucked it up so badly I had to get another one, at the same time he hit me and head butted me, and only left when I threatened to call my mum. I had a bruise on my head for over 10 days. He texted my mum abusive shit claiming I’m a hoe because I reblogged a guys picture on tumblr and even tried to turn my friends against me by telling them all the “bad things” about me. Which didn’t work - it just made him look foolish. I called a uber to take me to london to fix my phone and it happened to be a guy I went to school with. He stayed with me for 4hours and didn’t charge me. He brought me food, reassured my mum I was okay and even calmed down some of my male friends. An hour after my ex left, his mum then sent me abusive messages calling me “the angel of death” because I wouldn’t take her son back. The manipulative emotional shit he/ they did during the entire relationship only resonated recently. It was literally a nightmare disguised as love. If I ever see him with another woman I will warn her too and so will my friends regardless if they’re with me or not. I recently spoke to one of his old ex’s and she confirmed that that was the reason why she left too. So I’m glad I walked when I did. I felt stuck and knew shit would get worse. He apologised via email a few weeks later and then 2 weeks ago sent another email blaming me for everything lol. He’s still playing victim online too. It’s hilarious but scary at the same time. He was much older than me, so there’s really no excuse for his behaviour/ his reluctancy to change and seek help either.
I have 5 brothers and the only reason why I didn’t involve them, is because I know what they are capable of and they’re all in a good place now. Plus he really isn’t worth it. I informed the police and they have reassured me that if anything happens, they will take full force. My God brother is a police officer.

I’m in a great place now though. It’s been 3 months and I’m completely over it. My life is gone back to being stress free and light. Heartbreaks are difficult. Walking away from a narcissistic and sociopathic person is even worse and repairing the damage could be a long process for some. But it isn’t the end of world. I’m back to being me again and I’m happy. I feel beautiful again. I’m being introduced to/ meeting some amazing prospects lol. But this summer I’m just living and going with the flow. There are some amazing men out there and I’ll be damned if I let this fuckery prevent me from experiencing love in its truest form.

Emotional and physical abuse is very real and if you find yourself in that situation, put yourself first and run. These types of people will never give you the closure you need as they thrive over the power of controlling you emotionally and they will continue to portray themselves as a victim to whoever listens. Let them. Who gives a shit. You’re free and life will open up and become light and beautiful again.
Dating Tom Holland Would Include....

  • Constantly bickering with Harrison on who Tom loves more. 
  • Always winning these fights
  • “Sorry mate, but have you seen her? She’s absolutely stunning.”
  • Having all sorts of adventures with Tom and Harrison
  • Because let’s face it, wherever Tom goes, Harrison follows.
  •  But never really minding because as long as Tom is around, so are you.
  • Tom always making sure that you’re okay. 
  • “You sure, love? Okay. I just want to make sure my girl is happy.” 
  • Him wrapping his arms around you every chance he gets.
  • Calling you every kind of cute nickname in the book because he can never just pick one.
  • “Babe, love, doll, sweetie, beautiful, gorgeous, cutie, honey,” All of them.
  • Sometimes finding himself just staring at you because he can not believe how lucky he is to have you.
  • Having to break up Tom and Harrison’s arguments on who loves you more. 
  • “Enough, you two. I swear you guys are like little kids fighting over a toy, and I am NOT a toy.” 
  • “Course you’re not, babe. But, I do love you more than Haz.” 
  • “I know you do. Why do you think I’m with you.” 
  • Tom leaving you with little notes that he placed everywhere.
  • “Hey babe, I love you!”
  • “Did you know you’re amazing?”
  • “You’re my girl, don’t ever forget.” 
  • “Call me when you find this!” 
  • “I could stare you forever.” 
  • “You’re the first and last person on my mind.” 
  • “I miss you.” 
  • Tom begging you to go with him everywhere because he just doesn’t want to leave you. 
  • “Please come with me.” 
  • “No, Tom. I have to work-”
  • “-but, I’m Spiderman. You don’t have to work.” 
  • “Did you just seriously use that line on me?”
  • “Did it work?” 
  • “Absolutely not, you dork. I love you, I do but I promise I’ll come visit. Okay?”
  • “Fine, but you better.” 
  • Always, always feeling guilty because you know that sometimes he gets a little bit of anxiety and stressed and you seem to be the only remedy. 
  • Flying out on the next flight possible.
  • And immediately all the stress and anxious thoughts are thrown out the window the minute he sees you. 
  • Him always whispering in your ear, “Thank you.” 
  • Always reassuring him that he’s earned all the success in his life.
  • Sometimes feeling a little scared that he’ll forget you with his oncoming fame. 
  • Tom reading you like a book and breaking these thoughts from your head. 
  • “You do know that I love you right? And that I wouldn’t be here without you. I’d be a wreck if I ever lost you. Don’t ever think for one second that I could make it without you.” 
  • Feeling reassured until the next time you felt scared. 
  • Tom always going above and beyond in his gifts for you on birthdays, anniversaries, and just because he want to’s. 
  • Him surprising you with a vacation to a place you’ve always wanted to visit. 
  • Following him basically anywhere and everywhere because he will literally get on his hands and knees to beg.
  • Forcing you to play basketball with him even though you know that there’s a reason why you’re not a pro basketball player. 
  • But always seeming to win.
  • Knowing that he lets you.
  • But never questioning it because it was his way of spending time with you.
  • Spending time with his family.
  • Because in a way, they’re your second family.
  • Tom’s mother commenting on how happy she is that Tom has found himself a wonderful girl.
  • His father agreeing one hundred percent and cracking jokes as to when they should expect the wedding.
  • His brothers always teasing Tom about how much you have him wrapped around your finger.
  • Blushing because you would never want him to be “whipped”, but it’s nice to know that you have that power.
  • Tom clapping back with, “At least I’ve got a girlfriend.” 
  • Laughing when they’d all get into a wrestling match.
  • “If I win, [Y/N] is mine!”
  • “No, if I win, [Y/N] mine!”
  • “Bloody Hell! You gits think you’re actually going to win? [Y/N] will always be mine, whether or not I do lose.” 
  • Going to the gym with him.
  • Getting distracted because by God those muscles should be illegal.
  • Him knowing it and teasing you about it.
  • Always getting back at him by doing anything and everything that shows of your figure.
  • Tom throwing down his weights and attacking you with kisses. 
  • Him always being respectful of your boundaries. 
  • Never pushing you to do things you don’t want to do. 
  • You loving him for it.
  • Knowing that you will eventually let him but just not right now because you’re not ready.
  • And him being perfectly okay with that.
  • Sparring with him.
  • Tom being beyond impressed at your skills.
  • Telling you everyday how much he loves you.
  • Begging him to take you to go get icecream even though he can’t really have any.
  • Scolding him when he says, “fuck it,” and gets himself some. 
  • “You’re trainer is going to be pissed.”
  • “So what.” 
  • Shaking your head and enjoying your icecream date with him.
  • Taking Tess out for walks together.
  • Taking a million pictures of her because she’s just so damn cute.
  • Lazy days with Tess
  • Cuddling the poor dog into suffocation until she can’t take it anymore and leaves.
  • Leaving you two clinging onto each other.
  • Tom leaving trails of kisses along your forehead.
  • Holding you tight.
  • Falling asleep in each other’s arms. 
  • Waking up in the middle of night, panicking because your parents are going to freak out.
  • Tom shooting out of bed to get you home.
  • Him trying to help you sneak into your house without your parents waking up.
  • Him mumbling that the two of you should just move out together.
  • Telling him that it would be a good idea but to talk about it later.
  • Tom always gushing about you in interviews.
  • Always being his plus one to the films you want to see.
  • Introducing you to your favorite actors.
  • Getting embarrassed when Robert Downey Jr. finally gets to meet you.
  • “SO, this is the girl you never shut up about? It’s about damn time I finally meet her. [Y/N], it’s so lovely to meet you. I feel like I practically know you with the amount of stuff Tom has told me about you.” 
  • Also getting a little embarrassed but not as embarrassed as when fans stop you on the streets.
  • Getting panicky because you’re just waiting for the hate.
  • But being surprised when it’s nothing but love and awe.
  • Agreeing to take pictures with them and asking to take one of them so you can put it on Instagram as well. 
  • Speaking of Instagram, Tom is forever posting sly pictures of you. 
  • You are literally all over his page.
  • But, it’s okay because he is all over yours.
  • You’ve been trending on #couplegoals for days
  • Threatening Tom with his life if he doesn’t stop posting the selfies you send him. 
  • Him not caring.
  • “I’ll take my chances, babe.”
  • Getting him back on snapchat with the crazy filters.
  • Agreeing to tone down the embarrassing pictures. 
  • But one or two always comes leaking out and you are forever mortified. 
  • Starting a prank war. 
  • You always seeming to have better pranks.
  • Feeling bad and deciding to call it off but not before Tom gets you really good. 
  • Laying out under the stars and talking about the future.
  • Telling each other that as long as you have each other, the future can bring whatever it wants.
  • Tom surprising you with a promise ring. 
  • “We’re both still really young and I know a lot of people our age are getting married but I just can’t imagine getting married at this moment. But at least with this, it’s a promise that you will have my last name, just not right now.” 
  • You accepting it because there is not a damn soul on this earth aside from Tom that you could see yourself with.
Dead Fandoms, Part 3

Read Part One of Dead Fandoms here. 

Read Part Two of Dead Fandoms here. 

Before we continue, I want to add the usual caveat that I actually don’t want to be right about these fandoms being dead. I like enthusiasm and energy and it’s a shame to see it vanish.


Mists of Avalon

Remember that period of time of about 15 years, where absolutely everybody read this book and was obsessed with it? It could not have been bigger, and the fandom was Anne Rice huge, overlapping for several years with USENET and the early World Wide Web…but it’s since petered out. 

Mists of Avalon’s popularity may be due to the most excellent case of hitting a demographic sweet spot ever. The book was a feminist retelling of the Arthurian Mythos where Morgan Le Fay is the main character, a pagan from matriarchal goddess religions who is fighting against encroaching Christianity and patriarchal forms of society coming in with it. Also, it made Lancelot bisexual and his conflict is how torn he is about his attraction to both Arthur and Guinevere.

Remember, this novel came out in 1983 – talk about being ahead of your time! If it came out today, the reaction from a certain corner would be something like “it is with a heavy heart that I inform you that tumblr is at it again.”

Man, demographically speaking, that’s called “nailing it.” It used to be one of the favorite books of the kind of person who’s bookshelf is dominated by fantasy novels about outspoken, fiery-tongued redheaded women, who dream of someday moving to Scotland, who love Enya music and Kate Bush, who sell homemade needlepoint stuff on etsy, who consider their religious beliefs neo-pagan or wicca, and who have like 15 cats, three of which are named Isis, Hypatia, and Morrigan.

This type of person is still with us, so why did this novel fade in popularity? There’s actually a single hideous reason: after her death around 2001, facts came out that Marion Zimmer Bradley abused her daughters sexually. Even when she was alive, she was known for defending and enabling a known child abuser, her husband, Walter Breen. To say people see your work differently after something like this is an understatement – especially if your identity is built around being a progressive and feminist author.


Robotech

I try to break up my sections on dead fandoms into three parts: first, I explain the property, then explain why it found a devoted audience, and finally, I explain why that fan devotion and community went away. Well, in the case of Robotech, I can do all three with a single sentence: it was the first boy pilot/giant robot Japanimation series that shot for an older, teenage audience to be widely released in the West. Robotech found an audience when it was the only true anime to be widely available, and lost it when became just another import anime show. In the days of Crunchyroll, it’s really hard to explain what made Robotech so special, because it means describing a different world.

Try to imagine what it was like in 1986 for Japanime fans: there were barely any video imports, and if you wanted a series, you usually had to trade tapes at your local basement club (they were so precious they couldn’t even be sold, only traded). If you were lucky, you were given a script to translate what you were watching. Robotech though, was on every day, usually after school. You want an action figure? Well, you could buy a Robotech Valkyrie or a Minmei figure at your local corner FAO Schwartz. 

However, the very strategy that led to it getting syndicated is the very reason it was later vilified by the purists who emerged when anime became a widespread cultural force: strictly speaking, there actually is no show called “Robotech.” Since Japanese shows tend to be short run, say, 50-60 episodes, it fell well under the 80-100 episode mark needed for syndication in the US. The producer of Harmony Gold, Carl Macek, had a solution: he’d cut three unrelated but similar looking series together into one, called “Robotech.” The shows looked very similar, had similar love triangles, used similar tropes, and even had little references to each other, so the fit was natural. It led to Robotech becoming a weekday afternoon staple with a strong fandom who called themselves “Protoculture Addicts.” There were conventions entirely devoted to Robotech. The supposed shower scene where Minmei was bare-breasted was the barely whispered stuff of pervert legend in pre-internet days. And the tie in novels, written with the entirely western/Harmony Gold conception of the series and which continued the story, were actually surprisingly readable.

The final nail in the coffin of Robotech fandom was the rise of Sailor Moon, Toonami, Dragonball, and yes, Pokemon (like MC Hammer’s role in popularizing hip hop, Pokemon is often written out of its role in creating an audience for the next wave of cartoon imports out of insecurity). Anime popularity in the West can be defined as not a continuing unbroken chain like scifi book fandom is, but as an unrelated series of waves, like multiple ancient ruins buried on top of each other (Robotech was the vanguard of the third wave, as Anime historians reckon); Robotech’s wave was subsumed by the next, which had different priorities and different “core texts.” Pikachu did what the Zentraedi and Invid couldn’t do: they destroyed the SDF-1.


Legion of Super-Heroes

Legion of Superheroes was comic set in the distant future that combined superheroes with space opera, with a visual aesthetic that can best be described as “Star Trek: the Motion Picture, if it was set in a disco.” 

I’ve heard wrestling described as “a soap opera for men.” If that’s the case, then Legion of Super-Heroes was a soap opera for nerds. The book is about attractive 20-somethings who seem to hook up all the time. As a result, it had a large female fanbase, which, I cannot stress enough, is incredibly unusual for this era in comics history. And if you have female fans, you get a lot of shipping and slashfic, and lots of speculation over which of the boy characters in the series is gay. The fanon answer is Element Lad, because he wore magenta-pink and never had a girlfriend. (Can’t argue with bulletproof logic like that.) In other words, it was a 1970s-80s fandom that felt much more “modern” than the more right-brained, bloodless, often anal scifi fandoms that existed around the same time, where letters pages were just nitpicking science errors by model train and elevator enthusiasts.

Legion Headquarters seemed to be a rabbit fuck den built around a supercomputer and Danger Room. Cosmic Boy dressed like Tim Curry in Rocky Horror. There’s one member, Duo Damsel, who can turn into two people, a power that, in the words of Legion writer Jim Shooter, was “useful for weird sex…and not much else.”

LSH was popular because the fans were insanely horny. This is, beyond the shadow of a doubt, the thirstiest fandom of all time.  You might think I’m overselling this, but I really think that’s an under-analyzed part of how some kinds of fiction build a devoted fanbase.  

For example, a big reason for the success of Mass Effect is that everyone has a favorite girl or boy, and you have the option to romance them. Likewise, everyone who was a fan of Legion remembers having a crush. Sardonic Ultra Boy for some reason was a favorite among gay male nerds (aka the Robert Conrad Effect). Tall, blonde, amazonian telepath Saturn Girl, maybe the first female team leader in comics history, is for the guys with backbone who prefer Veronica over Betty. Shrinking Violet was a cute Audrey Hepburn type. And don’t forget Shadow Lass, who was a blue skinned alien babe with pointed ears and is heavily implied to have an accent (she was Aayla Secura before Aayla Secura was Aayla Secura). Light Lass was commonly believed to be “coded lesbian” because of a short haircut and her relationships with men didn’t work out. The point is, it’s one thing to read about the adventures of a superteam, and it implies a totally different level of mental and emotional involvement to read the adventures of your imaginary girlfriend/boyfriend.  

Now, I should point out that of all the fandoms I’ve examined here, LSH was maybe the smallest. Legion was never a top seller, but it was a favorite of the most devoted of fans who kept it alive all through the seventies and eighties with an energy and intensity disproportionate to their actual numbers. My gosh, were LSH fans devoted! Interlac and Legion Outpost were two Legion fanzines that are some of the most famous fanzines in comics history.

If nerd culture fandoms were drugs, Star Wars would be alcohol, Doctor Who would be weed, but Legion of Super-Heroes would be injecting heroin directly into your eyeballs. Maybe it is because the Legionnaires were nerdy, too: they played Dungeons and Dragons in their off time (an escape, no doubt, from their humdrum, mundane lives as galaxy-rescuing superheroes). There were sometimes call outs to Monty Python. Basically, the whole thing had a feel like the dorkily earnest skits or filk-singing at a con. Legion felt like it’s own fan series, guest starring Patton Oswalt and Felicia Day.

It helped that the boundary between fandom and professional was incredibly porous. For instance, pro-artist Dave Cockrum did covers for Legion fanzines. Former Legion APA members Todd and Mary Biernbaum got a chance to actually write Legion, where, with the gusto of former slashfic writers given the keys to canon, their major contribution was a subplot that explicitly made Element Lad gay. Mike Grell, a professional artist who got paid to work on the series, did vaguely porno-ish fan art. Again, it’s hard to tell where the pros started and the fandom ended; the inmates were running the asylum.

Mostly, Legion earned this devotion because it could reward it in a way no other comic could. Because Legion was not a wide market comic but was bought by a core audience, after a point, there were no self-contained one-and-done Legion stories. In fact, there weren’t even really arcs as we know it, which is why Legion always has problems getting reprinted in trade form. Legion was plotted like a daytime soap opera: there were always five different stories going on in every issue, and a comic involved cutting between them. Sure, like daytime soap operas, there’s never a beginning, just endless middles, so it was totally impossible for a newbie to jump on board…but soap operas know what they are doing: long term storytelling rewards a long term reader.

This brings me to today, where Legion is no longer being published by DC. There is no discussion about a movie or TV revival. This is amazing. Comics are a world where the tiniest nerd groups get pandered to: Micronauts, Weirdworld, Seeker 3000, and Rom have had revival series, for pete’s sake. It’s incredible there’s no discussion of a film or TV treatment, either; friggin Cyborg from New Teen Titans is getting a solo movie. 

Why did Legion stop being such a big deal? Where did the fandom that supported it dissolve to? One word: X-Men. Legion was incredibly ahead of its time. In the 60s and 70s, there were barely any “fan” comics, since superhero comics were like animation is today: mostly aimed at kids, with a minority of discerning adult/teen fans, and it was success among kids, not fans, that led to something being a top seller (hence, “fan favorites” in the 1970s, as surprising as it is to us today, often did not get a lot of work, like Don MacGregor or Barry Smith). But as newsstands started to push comics out, the fan audience started to get bigger and more important…everyone else started to catch up to the things that made Legion unique: most comics started to have attractive people who paired up into couples and/or love triangles, and featured extremely byzantine long term storytelling. If Legion of Super-Heroes is going to be remembered for anything, it’s for being the smaller scale “John the Baptist” to the phenomenon of X-Men, the ultimate “fan” comic.

The other thing that killed Legion, apart from Marvel’s Merry Mutants, that is, was the r-word: reboots. A reboot only works for some properties, but not others. You reboot something when you want to find something for a mass audience to respond to, like with Zorro, Batman, or Godzilla.

Legion, though, was not a comic for everybody, it was a fanboy/girl comic beloved by a niche who read it for continuing stories and minutiae (and to jack off, and in some cases, jill off). Rebooting a comic like that is a bad idea. You do not reboot something where the main way you engage with the property, the greatest strength, is the accumulated lore and history. Rebooting a property like that means losing the reason people like it, and unless it’s something with a wide audience, you only lose fans and won’t get anything in return for it. So for something like Legion (small fandom obsessed with long form plots and details, but unlike Trek, no name recognition) a reboot is the ultimate Achilles heel that shatters everything, a self-destruct button they kept hitting over and over and over until there was nothing at all left.


E. E. Smith’s Lensman Novels

The Lensman series is like Gil Evans’s jazz: it’s your grandparents’ favorite thing that you’ve never heard of. 

I mean, have you ever wondered exactly what scifi fandom talked about before the rise of the major core texts and cultural objects (Star Trek, Asimov, etc)? Well, it was this. Lensmen was the subject of fanfiction mailed in manilla envelopes during the 30s, 40s, and 50s (some of which are still around). If you’re from Boston, you might recognize that the two biggest and oldest scifi cons there going back to the 1940s, Boskone (Boscon, get it?) and Arisia, are references to the Lensman series. This series not only created space opera as we know it, but contributed two of the biggest visuals in scifi, the interstellar police drawn from different alien species, and space marines in power armor.

My favorite sign of how big this series was and how fans responded to it, was a great wedding held at Worldcon that duplicated Kimball Kinnison and Clarissa’s wedding on Klovia. This is adorable:

The basic story is pure good vs. evil: galactic civilization faces a crime and piracy wave of unprecedented proportions from technologically advanced pirates (the memory of Prohibition, where criminals had superior firearms and faster cars than the cops, was strong by the mid-1930s). A young officer, Kimball Kinnison (who speaks in a Stan Lee esque style of dialogue known as “mid-century American wiseass”), graduates the academy and is granted a Lens, an object from an ancient mystery civilization, who’s true purpose is unknown.

Lensman Kinnison discovers that the “crime wave” is actually a hostile invasion and assault by a totally alien culture that is based on hierarchy, intolerant of failure, and at the highest level, is ruled by horrifying nightmare things that breathe freezing poison gases. Along the way, he picks up allies, like van Buskirk, a variant human space marine from a heavy gravity planet who can do a standing jump of 20 feet in full space armor, Worsel, a telepathic dragon warrior scientist with the technical improvisation skills of MacGyver (who reads like the most sadistically minmaxed munchkinized RPG character of all time), and Nandreck, a psychologist from a Pluto-like planet of selfish cowards.

The scale of the conflict starts small, just skirmishes with pirates, but explodes to near apocalyptic dimensions. This series has space battles with millions of starships emerging from hyperspacial tubes to attack the ultragood Arisians, homeworld of the first intelligent race in the cosmos. By the end of the fourth book, there are mind battles where the reflected and parried mental beams leave hundreds of innocent bystanders dead. In the meantime we get evil Black Lensmen, the Hell Hole in Space, and superweapons like the Negasphere and the Sunbeam, where an entire solar system was turned into a vacuum tube.

It’s not hard to understand why Lensmen faded in importance. While the alien Lensmen had lively psychologies, Lensman Kimball Kinnison was not an interesting person, and that’s a problem when scifi starts to become more about characterization. The Lensman books, with their love of police and their sexism (it is an explicit plot point that the Lens is incompatible with female minds – in canon there are no female Lensmen) led to it being judged harshly by the New Wave writers of the 1960s, who viewed it all as borderline fascist military-scifi establishment hokum, and the reputation of the series never recovered from the spirit of that decade.


Prisoner of Zenda

Prisoner of Zenda is a novel about a roguish con-man who visits a postage-stamp, charmingly picturesque Central European kingdom with storybook castles, where he finds he looks just like the local king and is forced to pose as him in palace intrigues. It’s a swashbuckling story about mistaken identity, swordfighting, and intrigue, one part swashbuckler and one part dark political thriller.

The popularity of this book predates organized fandom as we know it, so I wonder if “fandom” is even the right word to use. All the same, it inspired fanatical dedication from readers. There was such a popular hunger for it that an entire library could be filled with nothing but rip-offs of Prisoner of Zenda. If you have a favorite writer who was active between 1900-1950, I guarantee he probably wrote at least one Prisoner of Zenda rip-off (which is nearly always the least-read book in his oeuvre). The only novel in the 20th Century that inspired more imitators was Sherlock Holmes. Robert Heinlein and Edmond “Planet Smasher” Hamilton wrote scifi updates of Prisoner of Zenda. Doctor Who lifted the plot wholesale for the Tom Baker era episode, “Androids of Tara,” Futurama did this exact plot too, and even Marvel Comics has its own copy of Ruritania, Doctor Doom’s Kingdom of Latveria. Even as late as the 1980s, every kids’ cartoon did a “Prisoner of Zenda” episode, one of the stock plots alongside “everyone gets hit by a shrink ray” and the Christmas Carol episode.

Prisoner of Zenda imitators were so numerous, that they even have their own Library of Congress sub-heading, of “Ruritanian Romance.” 

One major reason that Prisoner of Zenda fandom died off is that, between World War I and World War II, there was a brutal lack of sympathy for anything that seemed slightly German, and it seems the incredibly Central European Prisoner of Zenda was a casualty of this. Far and away, the largest immigrant group in the United States through the entire 19th Century were Germans, who were more numerous than Irish or Italians. There were entire cities in the Midwest that were two-thirds German-born or German-descent, who met in Biergartens and German community centers that now no longer exist.

Kurt Vonnegut wrote a lot about how the German-American world he grew up in vanished because of the prejudice of the World Wars, and that disappearance was so extensive that it was retroactive, like someone did a DC comic-style continuity reboot where it all never happened: Germans, despite being the largest immigrant group in US history, are left out of the immigrant story. The “Little Bohemias” and “Little Berlins” that were once everywhere no longer exist. There is no holiday dedicated to people of German ancestry in the US, the way the Irish have St. Patrick’s Day or Italians have Columbus Day (there is Von Steuben’s Day, dedicated to a general who fought with George Washington, but it’s a strictly Midwest thing most people outside the region have never heard of, like Sweetest Day). If you’re reading this and you’re an academic, and you’re not sure what to do your dissertation on, try writing about the German-American immigrant world of the 19th and 20th Centuries, because it’s a criminally under-researched topic.


A. Merritt

Pop quiz: who was the most popular and influential fantasy author during the 1930s and 40s? 

If you answered Tolkien or Robert E. Howard, you’re wrong - it was actually Abraham Merritt. He was the most popular writer of his age of the kind of fiction he did, and he’s since been mostly forgotten. Gary Gygax, creator of Dungeons and Dragons, has said that A. Merritt was his favorite fantasy and horror novelist.

Why did A. Merritt and his fandom go away, when at one point, he was THE fantasy author? Well, obviously one big answer was the 1960s counterculture, which brought different writers like Tolkien and Lovecraft to the forefront (by modern standards Lovecraft isn’t a fantasy author, but he was produced by the same early century genre-fluid effluvium that produced Merritt and the rest). The other answer is that A. Merritt was so totally a product of the weird occult speculation of his age that it’s hard to even imagine him clicking with audiences in other eras. His work is based on fringe weirdness that appealed to early 20th Century spiritualism and made sense at the time: reincarnation, racial memory, an obsession with lost race stories and the stone age, and weirdness like the 1920s belief that the Polar Arctic is the ancestral home of the Caucasian race. In other words, it’s impossible to explain Merritt without a ton of sentences that start with “well, people in the 1920s thought that…” That’s not a good sign when it comes to his universality. 


That’s it for now. Do you have any suggestions on a dead fandom, or do you keep one of these “dead” fandoms alive in your heart?

During his move to Washington, DC, Stiles made a number of realizations about life, the most prominent of which was that it was amazing what kind of hobbies a guy could pick up when his days weren’t packed full of running for his life from various supernatural horrors. Like trivia nights, for example. Stiles had a regular team and the entire bar groaned when they walked in because they knew they were about to get creamed.

Or the tabletop gaming club he joined, where everyone was just as competitive as he was, and punches had been thrown on more than one occasion.

Or like, Stiles jogged now.

Through the National Mall.

Like Captain America or some shit.

And with these hobbies came a sort of routine, and though most were on hold during the summer when his trivia team and gaming rivals were back home, the running stuck. It was calming and got his mind off things, gave him a chance to think about any papers he had to write, or de-stress about his FBI internship when it got a little hectic.

It was a good routine.

So every Saturday morning, Stiles got up a little earlier so he could get in his longer route, and left his dorm for his jog through the National Mall. On Saturdays, he took the path that went through the war memorials, down into West Potomac Park, and over to the Jefferson Memorial. It was his favorite place to take a breather because that early in the morning, there were rarely any tourists, and other joggers left him alone. It was nice and private, with a great view of the city across the water.

Stiles leaned back against the front steps and glanced around him casually, making sure there was no one too close before pulling out his little burner flip phone.

He had an old school drug dealer flip phone. His dad would be so proud.

There was only one number the phone ever called, so there was no need to save it under a name.

He waited for a few minutes, biding his time until the clock hit 7:15am, and then he called that number.

On the third ring, Derek picked up.

“Morning, sunshine!” Stiles greeted, already wide awake from his jog. Derek grunted back. He must’ve had a late night at the bar. “Any leads?”

Derek yawned loudly. “Still no werewolves with triskele tattoos, still wanted for murder.”

Keep reading

Being Lin-Manuel Miranda’s Daughter...
  • Lin would cry the day you were born but he would also brag a lot.
  • He’d shower you with gifts but he was also careful not to overdo it
  • Chances are, (depending on your age and whatever year you’d picture this for) you’d be friends with a lot of the Hamilton cast/ and or their kids
  • There’s no doubt about it you’d be a freestyling genius much like him and musically talented.
  • And Lin would be so proud of this
  • Lin’s heart would melt every time you called him ‘dad’
  • He is probably one of the most caring, sweetest, and involved father out there.
  • And if your mother wasn’t in the picture, Lin would be sure to work to fill in her shoes.
  • He would attend all your school events and extra curriculars too.
  • On mother’s day he would plan a brunch inviting his sister and mother over making sure you knew you weren’t alone when it came to the amount of females in your life.
  • Whenever he goes to Richard Rodgers Theatre or goes to work for whatever project he’s working on he is constantly pulling his phone out to show his fellow coworkers pictures of you
  • He can’t help it
  • But one thing is for sure, Lin would make sure you knew how strong of a woman you were. Being a strong activist for equal rights Lin knew how easy it was for girls in today’s society to feel weak and defeated by the powerful and he never wanted you to experience that. So he would make post-it notes and stick them in your lunchbox, on your mirror, and anywhere he could find with sayings such as…
  • “I am woman hear me roar!”
    “Though she be but little, she is fierce!”
    “A strong woman looks fear in the eye and gives it but a wink.”
    “You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem and smarter than you think.”
  • And because your father is one of the most encouraging and inspiring figures in the world, not only in tweets but reality as well, he excels at giving the best, most needed pep talks when you’re down in the dumps.
  • Lin had you speaking Spanish as soon as you said your first word
  • Lin would practically document your entire life. He liked taping you and taking pictures while you were doing casual activities such as coloring, singing, dancing, playing with your dolls, running around the house, etc.
  • Tobillo basically being your best friend
  • That dog follows you wherever you go
  • Lin has thousands of videos from when you were learning to walk, practically waddling around and Tobillo was right on your heel the entire time following you.
  • The whole Hamilton cast would be obsessed with you
  • Especially Phillipa
  • That girl loved you as if you were her own
  • And if you were old enough, you would join the Schuyler Sisters in their inbetween shows closet talk.
  • Sleep overs at Jasmine and Anthony’s while your dad is out of town
  • And they would absolutely LOVE having you over
  • You made them want to have kids that much more and Anthony loved taking you to the movies and Jasmine loved taking you out shopping
  • Speaking of shopping, Renee, Jasmine, and Phillipa are always spoiling you with the newest trends and what nots.
  • The Hamilton cast would be like another family to you
  • Always running around backstage with Groffsauce, who usually was assign babysitting duty.
  • The Schuyler sisters- as well as Leslie teaching you how to harmonize
  • Daveed loved helping you with your freestyling
  • You and him always got in heated battles- in good spirits of course
  • Playing childish games during intermission and between shows with Oak, Daveed, and Anthony.
  • Trying to braid your dad’s hair during his Hamilton days
  • Let’s be real, Lin would dedicate Dear Theodosia to you
  • And during Stay Alive (reprise) and It’s Quiet Uptown he had genuine tears pinching at his eyes as he fathomed the thought of losing you
  • But Lin would always run to you and spin you around every night after shows
  • The two of you would walk hand and hand together home and Lin would sing you to sleep every night
  • He’d love making you breakfast and basking in that domestic life
  • I could see him making some of the best pancakes in the world
  • And one morning when you were little, you convinced him to let you have a sip of his coffee
  • “Daddy, what’s that black stuff in there.”
    “It’s called coffee, bebé.”
    “Can I try some?”
    “Uh, I don’t think so, Y/n. You wouldn’t like it.”
    “Please, papi.”
    “Oh alright.”
  • Like he predicted, you hated it. The liquid burned your throat and young little you cried at the bitterness for at least a minute which broke Lin’s heart.
  • Lin would be the type of parent that would love to show you off to family and friends but when it came to posting pictures of you on social media, he usually made sure your face was covered, just to keep an element of privacy in his life.
  • But he does love tweeting stories about you or cute things that you do
  • Your childhood years would be a little hectic. Lin probably wouldn’t be around as much as he wants with filming, acting, composing and all but he would make an effort of a lifetime to be as involved as possible.
  • By your late teens you had already seen much of the world but that didn’t mean you were bored by any mean. Adventure was in your soul.
  • Lin would spend a lot of time with you during his time working with the film Moana. He liked to come to you to find inspiration.
  • Family trips to Disney World and Land
  • Lin is constantly trying to help you with his homework
  • “You know I was a teacher.”
  • Coming to him when you start learning about the American Revolution
  • “Well I mean you came to right person. I did write an entire musical about this stuff. Just use the album for a reference, it’s mostly accurate.”
  • Walking into your house one day after school infuriated as you set your pop quiz on the Schuyler Sisters in front of him, a large 9/10 circled with red pen.
  • “And I quote, I’m the oldest and the wittiest… My father has no sons… dad you cost me a perfect score! Why did you lie in the lyrics, I thought you said I could trust them!”
    “I’m sorry I forgot they had other siblings!”
  • Similar to your father, you swore like a sailor
  • Which also meant you were constantly getting scolded and death glares from your father who claims “He didn’t raise you to speak like that.” Even though you both know he did.
  • But honestly I could see Lin being into girl drama. Like when he picks you up from school and sees an annoyed look on your face he’d just shake his head and say,
  • “Spill the tea, honey. I’m ready!”
  • And on your bad days after dropping you off at home after school, Lin would drive to the nearest DQ and Chick-Fil-A and movie store returning home with gifts in toll.
  • He was one of the only people in the world you trusted enough to tell everything too
  • Dad jokes, so many dad jokes.
  • “Dad I’m thirsty. Do we have any-“
    “Hi thirsty nice to meet you I’m Lin-Manuel.”
  • Being very close with your grandparents
  • Your grandpa teaching you how to cook
  • Your grandma would spoil you tbh
  • Girl talk with your Aunt Luz
  • Your dad would be really big on making sure you knew and understood the importance of equality and treating others with respect. 
  • Weekly meals at their place where your grandpa is also telling tales
  • “You know pequeño, when your father was your age I couldn’t get him to shut up!”
    “Papi-“
    “He was always doing his rapping, talking fast and never making sense but he had passion just like yourself so don’t you ever give up on yourself carino. If your father did he would not be where he is today- and neither would you.”
    “Thank you abuelo.”
  • And when you finally do make it, doing whatever or being wherever that may be, you’ll have Lin’s as well as the rest of your families support because Lin knows exactly what it feels like to have millions of people doubt you and laugh at you for doing the unexpected so his support will never run out.
  • When Lin finds out you have a passion for writing and composing, he immediately takes you with him for a daddy daughter date to the studio.
  • He pretends to be out of ideas for a song and you play along knowing it would be a lot less painful to take the easy path.
  • “Well there are a few different projects I’ve been working on lately. They aren’t too good… pretty shitty-“
    “Y/n.”
    “Sorry… but uh, you can have a look I suppose.”
  • Becoming a co writer beside your dad on his next project
  • Going on walks and hikes together with Tobillo
  • But for real though Lin would be insanely protective over you
  • Like when it comes to you Lin always needs to know where you are and constantly has eyes on you
  • When you got your first boyfriend/girlfriend Lin would FLIP
  • You’d suddenly become a player in the game ’21 questions’ or more like 101 questions when it came to your dad
  • He demanded meeting your significant other and no matter the gender, he held his strong demeanor and hardly cracked a smile- well until he saw how happy you looked in their presence.
  • But eventually he’d come to term with it. Although he would always see you as his little girl, he knew you had to spread your wings and he was not about to hold you back from doing so.
  • And when you finally land a lead role on an upcoming Broadway show, Lin is ecstatic.
  • Every day he calls you to ask how rehearsals are going partly because he’s interested and excited for you but also because he remembers his restless days and nights where he’d come home so stressed he’d forget to eat for days. He didn’t want to see you go through the hardships he did.
  • Ironically enough the new production is held, opening night, in the same old theater you grew up in, Richard Rodgers. Home sweet home. 
  • And on opening night you can guarantee your father is sitting front row with four bouquets of various flowers surrounded by all your family and friends as well as a handful of the original and new Hamilton cast.
  • And he would cry. A lot.
  • But he would also be that dad that right before the show starts, as the lights are dimming, he stands up and shouts,
  • “Go Y/n!”
  • His proud dad tweets would be never ending that night
  • After the production he was sure to be the first backstage and the first to hug you.
  • “You did it, you did it! I’m so proud of you, mi ángel. Congratulations!”
  • You’d be lying to yourself if you said your dad didn’t have a surprise party planned for after the play because he did.
  • Not to be a downer but there would be days where Lin would cry himself to sleep thinking he hasn’t done enough, or given you the life you deserve. He worked himself far too hard to make sure you had everything you could ever need and knew you were loved, but sometimes he couldn’t help but fear the worst.
  • Although at times he can be overbearing, you wouldn’t want it anyway else.

This was so fun to write oh my lord, hope you enjoyed!

-Daizy xx

So, the time has come where I have decided to share my hidden Nashcon 2016 Cockles photo op with everyone.

Why did I wait so long? Because I told myself, as a silent promise to Jensen and Misha, I was going to wait one year from the day, before I share it, even though Misha said to share it initially. Haha. Anyway, it’s been four months past the year mark, and I have decided to finally unveil the photo, I know it might garnish some stuff from haters, and I might be called “disrespectful”, however I ask everyone to read below first, on how my situation went down with receiving the photo, and then cast your opinions.

 So, I am waiting in the photo op line nervous as all hell haha, I keep the front of the book hidden the entire time, just patiently and nervously waiting. The book I held in my hands was “The Threesome Handbook”, by Vicki Vantoch (For those who don’t know who she is, she’s the amazing woman married to Misha!!). I’ve had the idea in my mind for nearly a year on how funny it would be to take a photo of the three of us reading it, I could imagine Jensen’s “what the hell position is that?!” Face, I can imagine Misha’s mischevious intrigued face, and then I would just be there looking like a dork, haha, either way, it was a year’s idea in the making. So the time has come and here i am shaking with my book…When it is my turn…I walk up to them…I immediately went to Jensen first because above anyone else, I wanted to get his Blessing for the photo, I didn’t want him to do it if he was not comfortable with it, and I was perfectly fine if he would have declined…So, I’m right in front of Jensen and I say “I completely understand if you don’t want to do this but, if not, it’s okay, but can we do something with this?” I showed him the book Misha’s wife wrote “The Threesome Handbook”, and he was like “With this?” He replied with like a shocked laugh as he pointed at the book, I laughed a bit in embarrassment…Then at this moment Misha comes over to the two of us, he sees the book and giggles as he grabs it, Misha being amused at the sight of the book, all I could do is look on in embarrassment and nervously laugh. At this point however, Jensen’s handler came up right away and was like “ Nope. No. No.” And she snatched the book out of Misha’s hand. So he was like “Oh Well” with a shrug kinda look then I was like “Oh well”, I knew at that point it was the risk of asking, so I didn’t mind. So I turned to Misha and Jensen and was like “Hugs then?” So we did a hug picture. The bliss and awesomeness of being between those two, still sends shivers down my spine. Forgive the capital letters but this was the exciting part…after the picture I THEN HUGGED THEM BOTH AND SAID THANK YOU, THEN THE HANDLER GAVE THE BOOK BACK TO ME. I WAS READY TO WALK AWAY WHEN MISHA GRABBED MY HAND, PULLED ME CLOSE TO HIM AND TOLD THE PHOTOGRAPHER TO TAKE ANOTHER. SO MISHA HUGGED ME WHILE WE HELD THE BOOK AND JENSEN GAVE HIS LIKE “WHAT?!” FACE. I WAS IN SHOCK!!!! SO ALL I HAD ENOUGH REACTION TIME FOR WAS TO MAKE A DORKY LOOKING “Idk, worth a shot” SUGGESTIVE FACE.


It happened so quick…I was not expecting it at all…After the picture all I could do was happily give Misha another hug, and just mutter “Thank you thank Misha”, I gave Jensen one more quick one and kinda high tailed it out of the room shaking.

Now…I was absolutely happy, and just speechless, I had two ops, the op I wanted to do, and I spent more time with them. The thing is though…After some time…I felt bad…because I wasn’t sure if Jensen was upset…or kinda just disappointed, because I felt maybe he didn’t want to do it and it was forced, as much as I appreciate it…To confirm, I decided to apologise to him when I got my autograph…The stressful part of it all, was the timing…See…I had to wait for the pictures to print, I wanted to grab it right away because I know sometimes people take photos of other people’s pictures, and I didn’t want this to get out by someone else’s hand. The thing is Jensen was then signing autographs in the same time…So, I was pacing back and forth from the picture table and the autograph hall to see how the lines were, just as it seemed like autographs were almost over, as they called my row many minutes before, the pictures were put out. LUCKILY I received my picture and I was able to make the line for Jensen, photo hidden. So again I nervously wait in line, when I got to him in line, he recognized me and said “Hey you” and smiled, and of course I was like “Hi” *giggles* and then I said “Jensen I’m really sorry about the book photo op”. He smiled and was like “ah, it’s no problem at all” And I said “Okay I just wanted to make sure you know I didn’t mean anything bad by it” and he said “Don’t worry about it, it’s perfectly fine”. I apologized to his handler also and she said “ Its okay honey, I’m not mad about it” and they both said you have a good night and pretty much don’t worry. So *SIGH OF RELIEF*

Got my autograph and his Blessing!! However me being me, I wanted security…So…To Make sure…When I got my Misha autograph, I walk up to Misha with items in hand to get signed.


Misha: “Oh hey it’s you, how are you?”


Me: “I’m good thank you, how are you?”


Misha: “I’m good, I’m good, are you having fun?


Me: “Yeah, it’s been really great”


*Misha begins to sign my items*


Me: *Nervously* “Can I ask you a question?”


Misha: “Of course go ahead”


Me: “Was Jensen upset with the photo with the book?”


Misha: *smiles, then giggles* “Oh no, he wasn’t upset at all. He would have gone through with it if a certain handler didn’t snatch it away from us”


Me: “Are you sure? I really don’t want him to be upset, I just didn’t think it’d be bad”


Misha: “No, don’t worry about it at all, he wasn’t upset” *Misha hands back items*


Me: “Okay, thank you Misha, thank you. You have a great night” *I say while gathering my stuff*


Misha: “You’re welcome. You too” *Misha smiles*


*I turn to walk away when Misha says to me*


Misha: “Don’t give it a second thought”


I respond by just smiling and saying a relieved “Okay”, and then I turn and head out to the hall.

So…This is that photo, from my amazing Nashcon 2016 time…I hope those viewing, find the humor in it as much as I do…If you’re gonna share it, please just attach this story with it, so people know, that yes while some might find it tasteless, it was done with a calculated understanding of the actor’s feelings behind taking the photo and not without asking their personal consent for it first, the events that unfolded from it, were not expected and were out of my hands, just as well I finally want to thank Misha and Jensen and just as well, Jared!! (Though they may not ever read this haha) for everything they’re do for the fans, it was a great time and is now a hell of a story I can add to my life of events. Everyone else…enjoy. :)


AO3 DragonKitten22
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Not So Picture Perfect || Kian Lawley Imagine (Requested)

“Literally all I want to do is go home. I really don’t want to be here,” I told Callie as I worked on the gym elliptical.

“What, why? You love the gym. What’s wrong?”

“Kian flies out with Jc and Dom today for the second half of the tour and won’t be back for 3 weeks.”

“Okay, I know you love him, but it’s only 3 ½ weeks. They will fly by, especially with Maya’s birthday party and Ricky’s “I Hit One Million” Bash.”

Even though I hate to admit it, she was right. It’s just 3 lousy weeks and with the technology we have today, it will be like he never left. 

“Fuck, you’re right. Did you know I hate that about you?”

“Yeah and I love you too, beyotch. Call me later, okay?”

“Alright, bye.”

I finished my 90 minute workout and headed home to see Kian for the last few hours. I grabbed my gym bag and unlocked the door to see Kian’s suitcases against the wall. I let out a sigh and called out to him.

“I’ll be there in a sec!” he yelled back. When he came into my view, I saw that he was on the phone.

“Yeah, Dude. I’ll be there in about an hour. Okay. Bye”

I gave him a confused look,”I thought your flight was at 10 tonight.”

“It was, but there was a screw up with the airline and our flight is 4:40 now.” I looked at the clock behind him and it read 1:27 pm.

“So that means you have to leave now,” I said defeated.

“Yeah, I’m sorry Baby.”

“No it’s fine, it’s not your fault. Did you need me to drive you?”

“I don’t need you to, but I definitely want you to,” he said as he embraced me. 

I helped him load his bags into the car and hopped in. I couldn’t help but think that i wouldn’t have moments like this for 3 fucking weeks. I hated it, but Kian loves his fans and would do anything for them. I would never stand between that.

After what seemed like the shortest ride in history, we pulled up to his terminal. Jc and Dom were already out there waiting for us and I helped unload Kian’s things. We stood there for what felt like forever, just holding each other.

“Ugh, ew! Come on already, Vitaly’s inside!” JC whined beside us. Kian and I decided to gross him out even more and started tongue battling each other.

“God! Didn’t you guys do enough of that before he left?!” asked Dom.

“We actually didn’t,” I said to Kian, looking kind of amused. 

“Well this is going to be one uncomfortable flight,” he joked.

“Speaking of flight, we gotta catch ours!” JC said.

“Fuuuck, I don’t want you to leave.”

“I know, but I’ll be back soon, okay.”

“Okay, have fun.”

“I will, I’ll call you when we land,” he said running into the airport.

“I’ll be waiting,” I said to myself.

When I arrived back to our place I was finally able to take a well needed shower. When I was done, I ordered food off of Postmates and caught up on ‘Are You The One?’ I really hated being here without Kian, but I had to remind myself that I did it during the first half and was (somewhat) fine.

My phone started to ring and I got excited when I saw that it was Kian calling.

“Hello?” 

“Hey, Baby. How are you?”

“Lonely. How was the flight?”

“Pretty good. Some kid threw up though, which made Dom almost throw up.”

“Ew, but kinda awesome, haha.” Our conversation didn’t last long due to the fact that he had a long day tomorrow and it was late where he was.

I decided that it was time for me to go to bed as well and try to not be so bleh.

The next few days were getting easier and easier. Almost two weeks have already passed and Maya’s birthday party was a great distraction. I hear from Kian every night and every night I miss him more. Tonight is Ricky’s bash and I’m really excited. I took me like 4 hours to get ready, but I was almost done. I was applying the last bit of makeup when my phone buzzed. 

I heard Callie come in and we naturally had to capture this moment. 

That night was complete blast. I can’t stress how proud I am of Ricky T for reaching over one million youtube subscribers. Callie and I finally got back to my place and I was about to take a shower when my phone started to ring.

“Hey, I saw your Snap. You look beautiful, how was the party?”

“It was really fun, but tiring. How’s the tour going?”

“It’s good! The fans are amazing, the closer I get to coming home, the more anxious I get to be with you.”

“*Sigh* I can’t wait for you to come back.”

“I know me either, but I’ll let you get some rest and I’ll do the same. Sweet dreams, Babe.”

“You too, Kian. Good night.”

The next few days were quite boring, but Kian comes home in a little over a week and I’m so happy! I had been trying to reach him for the last few hours now, but he wasn’t picking up. I finally gave up on him and tried calling JC, but it was too loud to hold a conversation. My last resort was Vitaly who evidently was asleep and didn’t know anything.

I realized that this was the first night Kian hadn’t called me and I got a sort of uneasy feeling in my stomach. I quickly shook it off and decided to go to bed. 

It was about 7:15 am when I was woken up by the constant vibration of my phone. After about 2 solid minutes, I groggily turn over and check what it is. I see that it is a bunch of Twitter notifications and I decided to open them. I see an assload of pictures of Jc with some random girl wither ass out, but that’s when I see it.

“What the fuck?” I say to myself as I read the tweets. I feel my heart drop as I see my boyfriend cradling another girl’s ass. I immediately decide to call him and of course it goes straight to voicemail. 

Over the course of the next 9 days, I didn’t leave the house. Ricky and Callie came over to keep me company, but I just wanted to be alone. Kian tried calling every 5 minutes, except when he was on stage, but I ignored all of them. Even the rest of the boys were trying to contact me, but I only talked to Vitally since he wasn’t there that night. He tried to get me to talk about it, but knowing that he would relay it all to Kian, I just changed the subject. 

So many people were talking about what happened, even Kian’s ex Andrea. All I could do at this point is cry and look at old photos of Kian and I. 

Kian comes back tomorrow and I had to make a hasty decision. I was in the middle of my thoughts when my phone vibrated over and over again. I thought I shut that fucker off. I go look at it and I see it is the man of the hour once again.

I can’t help but smile a little bit as I cry even harder now. Is it worth letting go? Is it worth staying? Then he said it. 

Those words made my decision so much easier.

Stalker

rompts: Combination of this one-shot where you’re batmom and just came back from a long business trip and all the kids missed you & when you get home you get shot by an unknown outside the manor in front of Damian who felt something was off? If we survive it’s up2u AND THIS one where Batmom has a stalker? And maybe she doesn’t want to tell Batman right away because she thinks she can handle it?

Requested by: @imagination-factory

AN: Warning there will probably be tears, but not for the reason you think …

Words:1089


          “My boys!!!!!” You open your arms as the boys run forward. You’re nearly driven to the ground by the force of four hugs. You make sure to hug each of your sons individually, before they begin fighting for your attention.

          You listen to the bickering as it turns from who your favorite is, to who’s the best baker of all things. Each boy takes a bag, and starts heading towards the house. Taking a deep breath, you smile at the man leaning against the door frame.

          Bruce is dressed in jeans and a sweater, a look you prefer to his usual suit. He looks relaxed and happy, something that never fails to fill you with joy. You open your arms again, as he begins walking towards you with his usual smirk.

          When he finally pulls you in for a hug, you take a deep breath, breathing in his scent. He’s big, and warm, and contrary to popular belief, quite cuddly. “I missed you.”

          He just laughs, “I missed you more. The bed is incredibly cold without you in it.”

          You just smile, as you begin walking towards the house. You can hear the boys arguing inside, when all of a sudden your steps falter. Not understanding what’s going on, you start to fall, and as Bruce catches you, the first tingles of pain hit you. And then it’s a searing pain. Sound disappears, and your eyesight starts to go fuzzy. The last thing you see is Bruce’s face, before everything goes black.  

          You wake up to something squeezing your arm. Your mouth is dry, and your head is fuzzy. Opening your eyes, you’re grateful that the lights are dimmed low. Turning your head to the side, you smile at the sight of Bruce. His eyes go a little wide, before he moves forward. He crouches down next to you. “Hey,” he whispers before pushing hair back from your face.

          You voice cracks a bit when you speak, “What happened?”

          “You were shot, by a man who appears to have been stalking you for quite some time. He escaped, but Jim is on the case.” You let out a small groan. Bruce runs a hand over his face, having gathered the meaning, “You knew about him?”

          You nod, “He kept showing up wherever I was. He sent flowers and food. I had my assistant throw everything away. Security went through everything too, there was nothing harmful in any of it, but I didn’t want to take a chance.”

          Bruce just nods, “Why didn’t you tell me?”

          “It all started after the Joker had escaped a few months ago. You and the boys were so stressed; I didn’t want to add to that.”

             Bruce’s hand covers yours, “You come first.”

          You give a small smile, “I honestly didn’t think he was a threat.”

          Bruce finally leans in and kisses you, “Next time, please just tell me when you have a stalker.”

          “Deal.”

          It takes a week before the doctors let you out of the hospital. The bullet had just barely missed your spine, and had hit a major artery on its way out. It was only Bruce’s knowledge of how to slow the bleeding that had kept you alive.

          The boys baby you over the next few days, they won’t even let you carry a bowl of soup. About a week after you get home, Jim alerts you that your stalker, and would be killer, had been caught. Caught in a room with pictures of you pasted everywhere. After several psychiatric tests it became clear that he had created a delusional relationship with you after you had complimented him for some computer work he had done in your office.  

          Apparently, you having left the country on the business trip was what set him off. Not being able to see you or observe you had driven him into a more violent psychosis. In the end, he’s sentenced to a stint in Arkham. That doesn’t reassure you, or your boys.

When he turns up dead in his cell one morning, there’s a lot of shuffling in the house. Eyes cut to Jason more often than they should, the curiosity is there but no one is brave enough to actually ask if he had done it.

You do your best to block it from your mind. You know Jason’s code is different than the others. You know he kills, but no one has ever killed for you before and that makes you a little nauseous.

About a week after the murder, you come home to what should be an empty manor. Bruce is at work, Tim and Damian are at school, and Jason and Dick were on a mission. So when you enter the Manor and hear frustrated screaming, you’re more than a little confused.

You follow the sound to the back yard to find Damian attacking a tree with a blade. He’s going at the tree as though it had demanded he go back to the league. As you get closer, you stop at sword’s length away and say, “Damian.”

He freezes mid swing. Slowly he turns to face you. And that’s when you notice. He’s thinner than he should be, there are dark circles under his eyes, and he won’t meet your gaze.

You move forward slowly. Stopping in front of him, you take the sword from his hand, and when you place a hand on his shoulder, he shrugs it off. “Damian,” you whisper. You do it again, and this time he gives into the touch, before the tears start rolling down his cheeks. He collapses into your arms, and you gently sink to the ground with him, tossing the sword to the side.

“It was me.”

You run your fingers through his hair, “What was you?”

“It was me who killed him.”

You freeze, “What?”

He straightens a bit, “I killed the stalker. Todd was going to do it, but I beat him to it. He found me in the cell, he’s the one who got me out, and cleaned up.”

You take a deep breath, “Oh, Damian.”

You pull him closer and you let him cry, “It shouldn’t bother me. I’ve killed before. I killed the entire time growing up, so why does it bother me now? Why?”

You’re not quite sure what to say, “Oh, my baby.”

“I couldn’t let him hurt you again. I can’t lose you. You’re my mom.”

You don’t say anything else, you just pull him in closer, and let him cry.

The First Time With Jeon Jungkook

Originally posted by jengkook

Genre : Fluff, romance,comedy,implicit language,sexual innuendos
Pairing:Jungkook x reader
Length: 29K words
Summary : This is a series based on all of your first times with jungkook, from your childhood till adulthood

PART 1 PART 2 PART 3 PART 4 PART 5 PART 6 PART 7

PART 8


Tell me your thoughts in the comments and ask box :)



THE FIRST TIME YOU CONFESSED TO EACH OTHER

2 days ago, Lusty&Nancy Bar, L.A, 00:42 AM

The scent of alcohol and smoke was heavy as Jungkook was drinking his last shot of martini before collapsing on her lap. She chuckled as she ran her soft fingers through his raven hair. Those majestic looking lips, that gorgeous nose and long lashes, could drive any girl insane at his sight, but only one girl could drive the latter over the edge. He untied his tie as he dropped it on the cold ground before making himself at home, sleeping on her lap. Jungkook was never completely drunk, but had this tendency to collapse at random moments and wake up randomly just to take off his clothes. He sniffled a few times before grabbing onto the soft hand that was caressing his ears.

“I missed you….” he murmured half coherently “…Y/N”

The girl’s face fell into a scowl as she heard your name coming out of his beautiful lips, one more time. Every time, it would be the same story. He would hit her up, they would talk for a few hours and he would end up drunk, sleeping on her lap. Who was she? His business partner Park Sooyoung. Tall, brunette, pretty and a bright future ahead of her. She made heads turn by her presence only. Being a year older than Jungkook, she often talked informally to him even if he was her superior. She never had any feelings towards the boy, but she couldn’t help but feel irritated every time he mentioned your unknown name before casually sleeping on her lap.

“Y/N… I really wonder who she is, for turning him into a mess” she sighed

“Sooyoung-ssi” Jungkook’s eyes suddenly sprung open “Do you think she still remembers me?” he unbuttons the first buttons of his dress shirt “Sometimes, I keep on wondering… if she actually cares about me?”

“Jungkook, I would like to give you an answer but—“

“It’s Mr. Jeon for you” he pointed at her before erupting in a fit of giggles “We’re still workmates remember?”

“Right… only workmates” she clenched her fist

“Mr. Jeon sounds like a sexier title as well. Right? How about Director Jeon?” he ran a hand through his hair before crouching his shoulders “That’s supposed to be my future title…” he grabbed her hand in his “Do you think I can do this?”

“I think the question should be: Do you want to do this?” she replied in a heartbroken tone

“You are right…” he laid his head back on her lap “What do I even want?” he laid the back of his hand on his forehead “I just want to go back home” he felt a tear slipping from his eyes

“Should I bring you back home?” Sooyoung smiled at him

The word home had a different meaning in Sooyoung’s suggestive context

….

Today, Dorms at Seoul University, 12:32 PM

You were sipping on your lemon tea as it was the start of a new semester in your area. You and your friends were about to have a blast for the last remaining weeks of summer before tackling another stressful term. It might’ve been your second year at Seoul University, but you never felt more than welcomed whenever stopping by campus. You’d usually go back home during the summers and get back to the dorms during the school year, but this year it was quite different, as you had to get back to the dorm earlier. Something about a change of roommates was occurring in your department. The dean’s daughter made a fuss about wanting to change rooms so they had to rearrange the rooms. Knowing that you were the only scholarship student in the residence building, they chose to make you move out to make more space for the new tenant.

“That little brat, I swear to god, she’s so spoiled and idiot” Jimin groaned as he watched you pack your belongings

“Don’t say that, Jimin” you nudged his arm “I mean, she does have a right to do this. She’s still the dean’s, one and only daughter.”

“Doesn’t change the fact that her IQ is lower than Hoseok’s grades. I despise people of her type the most”

“Why do you hate on her so much?”

“Because she ruined your summer! You had to get on a 3 hours train ride to pick up your stuff Y/N. Why can’t you realize that she’s an annoying brat? She purposely made you move your ass from your vacation break to come in town.”

“She probably didn’t mean it that way! I actually decided to drop by in advance, so stop it” you patted his arm

“Still doesn’t change the fact that you need to leave your room” Jimin rubbed his temples “Damn you, stupid Park Chaeyoung”

“I always thought she had something for you though…” you raised a brow at him “Like a tiny crush?” you winked

“W-What?! Whoah, that’s the best joke I’ve heard in a century” Jimin flushed a slight tint of red “Girls like her are what I want to avoid the most.” He scoffed “In the last two years I’ve lived on campus, I never saw a girl as whiny and as spoiled as her. Do you realize that her majesty has a personal slave that holds her goddamn haute couture Gucci bag? Even Taehyung who owns the whole Gucci collection doesn’t do that kind of shit”

“But still, she asked nicely” you replied “It’s her last year before leaving for Ireland. That’s the least I can do to help her, as a student”

“That’s the problem with you Y/N” Jimin pointed at you “You’re way too f*cking nice to be real.”

“Come on, it’s just a room” you rolled your eyes

“You’re moving to the science department dorms! Do you realize how creepy most of these guys are?”

“I always thought they were brilliant though “you grabbed your clothes “Namjoon Sunbae is such a cutie. He was the best T.A I ever had in my years here”

“Namjoon is an exception, I’m talking about the weird guys who are in the engineering department. They always become weird as f*ck around finals.” Jimin sighed “They apparently become crazy because of their work load. Take Yuta for example! He didn’t even last a semester in there! He gave up halfway and changed programs” He sighed “These poor beings.”

“Oh, are you talking about those weird rumors of them being perverts? The boys who are taking engineering at Seoul U, are cute though, well that’s what I always thought” you commented “They’re not crazy”

“Okay yes, they seem all normal, but that’s because you’re a girl. They won’t show you their real nature” Jimin pressed his back on the wall

“What about you? Mr. Psychology. Stop digging too far inside my brain with your manipulative talks” you stared at him

“What are you talking about?”

“Why are you so concerned about me, talking to the boys in engineering?” you raised a suspicious brow “Is it Jungkook who told you to look out for me, again?”

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Submit To Me - Dylan O’Brien

Author: @mf-despair-queen

Characters: Dylan O’Brien/Reader

Word Count: 15,061

Warnings: NSFW, 18+, Public Teasing, Public Masturbation, Teasing in the car and in the bedroom, pleading, seduction, striping Dylan because he’s sexy as fuck, dry humping, thigh riding, hand jobs, face riding, handcuffs, blindfolds, 69 (aka oral male and female receiving), overstimulation, praising, orgasm denial, female riding male (regular and reverse cowgirl), whiny Dylan, mentions of dominant Dylan, A lot of submissive Dylan, BREATHY MOANS

Notes: I will make this short as I am writing this pool side from hell. I’m so sorry this took forever. I have no excuses. But hopefully it was worth it. I honestly don’t know if this is my best writing for what you guys wanted from this. I promise the next thing I write won’t take as long. 

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Beggin' For Thread (Bucky Barnes x Reader) Request! ❤

A/N: To the lovely anon that requested this brilliant idea!! I loved writing this because boxers in general are super comfy and look hell sexy, too. Especially on Bucky Barnes! :D Hope you guys like it!! ENJOY! - Delilah ❤

Beggin’ For Thread: Reader steals some of Bucky’s boxers during laundry day. But when he goes to her for comfort from a thunderstorm he gets a surprise.

 Warnings: Sex (M/F). Hurt/Comfort. Angst. 

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here are a bunch of AMAZING fics I’ve enjoyed and loved reading throughout the month of july. I recommend that you read these great fics in august, if you haven’t already!! also check out the HL Summer Fic Exchange - my fic will be posted soon (hopefully)!

(all fics with a star are my favorites and if there are two stars then it was a favorite favorite)


1. Just a Walk in the Park 124k **

It’s 2015, the first time dinosaurs walked the earth in over 65 million years. The multi-billion dollar company, Twist Corporations, is planning a summer opening for their world changing attraction, “Jurassic Park”.

They take an interest in the history making duo of Dr. Louis Tomlinson, a stubborn paleontologist, and his partner, paleobotanist Dr. Liam Payne, giving them the chance of a lifetime to work for the new theme park. Louis is apprehensive, but Liam has a “gut feeling” that it will change their lives. He isn’t wrong.

Featuring Niall as the top engineer to get the park up and running, Zayn as the raptor expert, and Harry as the grandson of one of the most influential men in the world.

2. Let’s Embrace the Point of No Return 33k

Louis was a whole new scale of beautiful, he was richer than Harry could’ve ever imagined, and he was the most powerful, dominant alpha that Harry had ever come in contact with. The only problem now is that Louis is also Harry’s boss.

Louis believed Harry was an alpha, and had no idea about how he had lied about his status just to get an interview with Louis. He was in too deep now and he couldn’t look back.

Or, Harry is an omega intern at an all alpha company. Louis is his boss. There’s some complications.

3. How Could I Ever Forget 14k

After his boyfriend leaves him for a job in New York, Harry vows to move on with his life. A year later when their best friends announce their engagement, Harry knows he’ll be forced to see Louis again and face the truth he’s been trying his best to hide–even from himself.

Or a Vegas AU where Ziam’s bachelor party turns into drunken karaoke, winning thousands at slots, washing your clothes at the laundromat in your underwear, and making life altering decisions that you can’t remember in the morning.

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The View (m)

Summary: When a supposed bath for one leads to something a little more fun.
Pairing: Jungkook x Reader
Genre: Smut
Warnings: PWP, exhibition kink, dirty talk, teasing, oral sex
Rating: M
Word Count: 4218

Originally posted by dream-bts


The tub is full, water sloshing over the sides any time either of you move an inch however, neither of you give a second glance at the liquid building up on the tiled floor. You both are too preoccupied with each other.

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All I’ve got II pt. 3

Jungkook x reader

genre: fucking fluff, angst, hints of smutty actions, badboy!jungkook, bestfriend!jungkook

word count: 12.6k


Jeon Jungkook was a tall guy, handsome with all those ethereal artwork tattooed on his arms..and your best friend. He was by your side whereas you faced a painful heartbreak, caressing your hurt soul for as long as you needed him. But how much can a friendship withstand if one of the two develops feelings?

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i. domesticity

I drink milk every day because my doctor says I need it to grow. Kind of like I need this calcium rush in order to make my bones stronger so I stop cracking them so easily. Preventing them from ever reverting to the weak, knobbly knees of last summer when a boy I had a crush on. Had a crush on, crushed me. Like a pulp. Into grains. Like a spoon grinding up soggy cereal swimming at the bottom of a bowl. I wake up in the middle of the night, remembering I didn’t drink 3 glasses today, and run to the refrigerator in my socks and chug it straight from the gallon, barbaric and yearning like a schoolgirl hitching her skirt up too high, and picture the white flowing through my veins. Softening me. Rounding me out. Giving me curves. I get a brain freeze instead and pray I’ll stop crying over spills and that I can sleep with this cold lurching in my stomach.

ii. vicinity

Maybe one day my hair will stop being so limp in the heat, but I don’t think that kind of thing can be anticipated, so I just have to wait. Girls like me live in the back of an un-air-conditioned convenience store, ratty sweatpants, tight tank tops, and crawl out with week-old receipts bursting from their pockets. Like glued ribcage kind of girls, like elastic hair tie, red marks around the wrist kind of girls. The cashier doesn’t mind when I snag a magazine from the rack and browse through it without paying because no matter how hard I try, I end up looking pre-pubescent anyway. And they let things slide. For a girl like me, at least. I’m saying, lopsided bun, wide eyes, a mouthful of crooked teeth, stars pulling them into their places, I was always too scared to get braces. The cover has some headline about how to enlarge your breasts naturally, which I think might be useful, and another about how to communicate effectively with others without saying hurtful things, which makes me laugh. I flip to the back to check my horoscope and eat that prophetic, adolescent shit catered to the teenage soul up like Eucharist laid under the tongue. Swallow down a spoonful of March’s: “Prepare to face some stress this month, but that’s okay! You’ll be able to get through it and find time to relax.” I want to rip out the page and shove it into my bra, like keeping these soft, meaningless words close to my chest will make them seep into my heart and change me. Stop making me think so much, fill my brain up with Arizona tea and static instead. But I’m cheap, and I shove the magazine back. I think my chest will stay flat forever.

iii. mobilization

I seek healing. Mending. I’m fingernails deep, sitting in the back of a subway at 3 a.m., pressing crescent moons into the leather seat, trying to dig up salvation. You can’t find that here, you can’t find that in the cracks between the tiles, you can’t find comfort in the ground up cigarette butt stamped into the floor. I’m wishing against this fogged up glass I could say anything, anything that would make sense for once, so someone could help me. Like please, my mind is bending in backwards, like please, I don’t think this underdeveloped chest can take any more of this resentment or it’s going to explode through my ribcage, out of my flesh, like please, I don’t want to hurt anymore. And it’s not my fault that I launch myself around like I’m in some sick little competition, pretending I don’t care, like I’m having the time of my life. Of course I’m not, of course I’m not, I don’t think having your hands shake and your brain go fuzzy whenever you think a little too much is fun, something to be documented for the world to see. I guess I’m different from other people that way, I’d rather people think I’m having a good time than actually have one without anyone knowing. I wish I knew how to sew, so I could stitch up my fibrillating heart, no matter how sloppy and crooked, but the needle jabs my finger as the subway lurches left, and I bleed, I bleed, I bleed.

iv. unearthliness

My mom told me not to walk naked in front of the altar. Disrespectful, she called it, and even though I agree, sometimes I test my divinity and emerge from the bathroom, the steam from the shower wafting off smoke like the incense in its pot. Young god, skin tinted green from fake gold. Young god, empty stomach, fruit scooped out of its rind, leaving me seedless. This hatred has roots, and I don’t know whether I want to dig out my insides with my hands or fill myself up until I’m close to bursting. I let people think the scratches on my knees are from a night of alcohol and a boy tugging my hair. Of course, it’s that and not child worship on a scratchy rug, not begging for forgiveness, not praying for glamour and glory, not hoping for. Of course it’s not hoping for something better.

—  this pain lasts in every location
Redemption // Jeon Jungkook

-

the prompt: Jungkook scenario when your pregnant unplan baby he finds the test when you get home he starts yelling, blaming you throwing things,tells you to gtfo of his life with the baby saying fucked up things. So you leave Korea 3 year later you come back with your daughter and you guys see each other again he tries to win you back angst beginning but fluff ending?

words: 8942

category: heavy angst + fluff ending

author note: it’s time to see how good destinee’s character development skills are. also y/n didn’t leave, jungkook did. hope that’s okay. im so proud of myself for writing this?? I didn’t give up and I’m glad i didn’t. anyway, this took forever to write you can literally see my writing improve as you keep reading its kind of funny anyway let’s go!

- destinee

Originally posted by sugutie

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watch me (m)

genre ― smut + a bit of fluff at the end, fuckboy!au

pairing ― jungkook | reader | taehyung

synopsis ― Dodging Jungkook’s annoying horny texts was easy but what happens when another boy accidentally joins in on the fun?

words ― 7,633

note : I meshed Play & Play 2.0 together and added a few things. Before I get asked, yes there will another part to this.

extra note : part two


Your ringtone kept blasting in your ear as you tried to sleep before a big presentation. You groaned, cursing yourself for not turning off the volume as you reached for the glowing device knowing exactly who it was. You denied the call thinking,”Why is he so fucking desperate?” You began closing your eyes again until a loud ding woke you up again.

JK (1:57 AM): Why didn’t you answer babe? I want to talk to you :(

You rolled your eyes and turned off your phone, getting back to your much needed sleep.

It was almost a routine with Jungkook, calling you at 2 in the morning expecting you to be down for some sexting. That boy didn’t know when to quit and you should have already blocked his number considering he’s been like this for 4 months straight. But you’ll be lying to yourself if you said you didn’t like the attention he was giving you.

Not that you were the only girl, of course, because being the all-star soccer player he had half the school population begging for him. Hell not just him but the rest of the soccer team and you weren’t one to judge because your eyes would wander over to their table every once in awhile just like the rest of them.

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Accidentally Exposed - Josh Dun Smut

A/N: Thank’s for 500, here’s a long ass Josh Dun smut to celebrate.

REQUESTED

Pairing: Josh Dun x Reader

Type: Smutty smut

Word Count: 4.6k

Warnings: Blood, nudes, sex, the fun stuff

REQUESTS ARE OPEN - ALSO SEND ME FEEDBACK

Originally posted by jcsephsdun

“I understand,” you say through gritted teeth. “Thank you for the consideration.” 

You push the end button and throw your phone onto the carpet of your apartment frustratedly, wanting to scream but also crawl under the covers and cry your eyes out.

You were a newly graduated student from a photography college and had big dreams to have your own photography company, but that wasn’t going so well to say the least. Right out of college, you moved straight to the heart of California, hoping to land as much as an internship with a company. Your resume was online and on many websites, but you barely got offered jobs, to which you weren’t even interested in. And when you applied to companies, you were rejected. Since you had to pay the bills, you had landed a job as a bartender, earning less than minimum wage to pay for your rent. You were past the state of angry and sad. You were loosing hope and money at rapid pace. 

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Before I start this post, I want to say that everyone’s orientation is different! I’ve seen that a lot of schools have orientation over the summer, weeks before classes start. My school, I guess because only a few of us are from here and the majority of students are out of the state/country, we had orientation week starting on move-in day, the same week classes started. That’s why I will be discussing move-in day and the first day of classes here, though yours might be a completely separate experience. Let’s get started!

Move-In Day

  • Dress for a lot physical activity. You are going to be lugging your shit up and down stairs (elevators get full, if you even have them) all day, walking back and forth to your car, and once you get everything in your room, you will have to unpack and loft your bed, etc. You are going to be sweaty and exhausted by the time it’s all over. I wanted to still be cute so I wore spandex, my Vandy t-shirt and hat, and a full face of makeup lol. I know you might want to make a good first impression on your roommate and new classmates, but everyone will be wearing what looks like workout clothes. Don’t wear jeans or a dress or something. It’s August, it’s hot, you’ll regret it.
  • Be patient. Oh my god, I swear 90% of the memories I have of move-in day are just me waiting. Waiting in the car for the line to move towards the dorms, waiting in line to get my key, waiting for a dolly to free up, waiting to get inside the elevator, waiting for the stairs to clear up. It’s so boring, especially when you’re so excited to just finally be there. Be prepared to wait and try to appreciate your last few moments before college ruins your life (just kidding!).
  • Brace yourself for something to go wrong. No matter how organized your school is, chaos is inevitable on move-in day. You will have planned according to a schedule they gave you, and something will not go the way it’s supposed to. Thousands of freshmen who don’t know anything all in the same place at once is a recipe for disaster. Just don’t stress about it cause it will all work itself out. Honestly, that’s a philosophy to live by for your entire college career, not just move-in day.

Orientation Week

  • I can’t even explain how busy you’ll be. Starting from the first floor meeting we had on move-in day, the entire next seven days were packed full of activities and meetings and ceremonies. I still have my freshmen guide with the itenerary of all the things we had to do, and it was pages long. Everyday we would wake up at like 8, and have things to do until after midnight. I was so busy, I didn’t even have time to be on my phone, and I love social media. You will be so tired, and it will get old really quick. I don’t really have any advice, but through the exhaustion, remember to try and appreciate this chaotic time and stay in the moment. You’ll never again experience the freshness and excitement of your first week at college, soon you’ll get used to it all and you’ll wish for that feeling back.
  • You don’t have to attend everything. Like I said, you will be exhausted. You won’t want to wake up at 6 am for the Freshman Sunrise (i did and i regretted it), or to take the class picture where you have to stand still for an hour and you can’t even see yourself in the photo (again, i should’ve slept in). You might feel obligated to go to everything, but if you just need a break, then take that break. Orientation is overwhelming. 
  • Don’t freak out if you miss a required meeting. We had lots of events that were marked required. It’s inevitable that people miss these, due to sleeping through an alarm, or reading the time wrong, or getting lost on campus since you don’t know where everything is. Lots of the time, they only mark it as required to scare people into going when there’s no real consequence if you don’t. Even if there is a consequence, you won’t get into any major trouble the first week. You’re freshmen, they understand. Do try to make it to them, though. The best way to do this is to find friends or other people who are in that same section and go together.
  • Don’t stress about making friends. It is quite literally impossible to not make friends during orientation week. You will have to attend so many things with the same group(s) of people that you’ll bond over that alone. You don’t even have to try, so if you’re not a social person, don’t worry. As long as you don’t stay silent in a corner, you’ll have plenty of people to hang out with. 
  • Don’t stress about keeping the friends you do make. You will meet a million people, and have a million new numbers in your phone. You will have a hard time matching everyone’s names to their faces. People form connections really quickly, that’s just human nature, but this is especially heightened in university when everyone is away from home and no one knows anyone. Don’t feel like you have to stay attached to the same five people you became best friends with after two days for fear of not finding anyone else to be close to. Lots of people meet their real friends at the beginning of the year, but most people don’t. All of the pictures and videos I have from my entire first semester are with and of people I don’t even speak to anymore, people who, frankly, I can hardly stand to look at now. During orientation, you’ll gravitate towards anyone, but you’ll soon realize you don’t know them at all and they might turn out to be shitty people. I met all the friends I have now second semester through the LGBT group on campus, and they’re great. Point is, don’t feel too attached to your orientation buddies. You will find your people, even if it takes a while.

First Day of Classes

  • Find the buildings where your classes are held beforehand. Yes, I mean physically walk to them and find the exact classroom, don’t just use Google Maps to make sure you can get there in ten minutes. I knew the names of all the buildings and their general location, but then I found out some buildings are attached to each other and numbered in a strange order, then you finally find the right building but can’t find the right floor and hallway. I was late to all of my classes the first day. University buildings are so confusing. You will have trouble, I promise you. Do yourself a favor and figure out how to get to all of your classrooms sometime earlier in the week. You will feel great about not being that embarrassing freshmen asking the upperclassmen for directions (who are happy to help, but will laugh at you just a little bit).
  • Introduce yourself to the professor before or after class. You don’t have to do this if you don’t want, but it can’t hurt. Just shake their hand and make sure they can match your face to the name. Doing this the first day makes it easier to establish contact with them later in the semester, which you’ll probably have to do. Don’t worry, you’ll see lots of the other students in your lecture doing this, too. Just hop on in line.
  • Double check to make sure you don’t have any assignments due/papers to bring. This is unlikely cause you don’t have summer work in college (at least to my knowledge) and it’s never happened to me, but I had friends whose professors had assigned them work for the the first day of class. This is really ugly, I know, but just check your email and Blackboard to make sure there’s nothing to do. 

This is longer than I anticipated, so thanks if you read it all! I hope this helps someone out. Orientation is a chaotic mess but so so fun, cause it’s the only time you’ll ever be able to experience the fun of college without the stress of the work. Up next is advice on living with a roommate (and boy, do I have advice for that). Previous posts:

Application Process

Choosing/Changing Majors