i was ready but not my heart

So, while Kim’s scene with Paige put me through the wringer, her scene with Jimmy’s the one that really broke my heart. Let’s unpack it and compound the suffering!

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My heart is so cold in the past weeks that talking about God is hard for me. I’m like a prodigal daughter who went away just to cover up my pain with false happiness. He keeps pursuing me through other people’s words but i keep abandoning Him because i keep listening to my pain. I thought life without Him will be easier but i ended up in misery because i have no joy at all. I want to go back as i cried to Him. I realized that i am not abandoned by Him, i am the one who abandoned Him. It just breaks my heart that i did it to the One who loves me most.

I want to be honest to who i am instead of acting like i don’t have struggles. To those who are ready to give up, always know that no matter how hard the storm is, just to be with God is the most beautiful thing this life has to offer. Don’t give up and keep the faith.
Just A Little More Time

Requested by an Anon: can you do one based off Opie and reader where she catches him cheating in their bed but he tried to fix it about a year later because he misses her and can’t handle life anymore.

The sounds were unmistakable, we had made those same sounds just last night; yet I was still in denial. My heart couldn’t or maybe wouldn’t except what my ears were hearing. I was standing at the door, my hand on the knob, ready to turn it, to open the door.

My brain knew what was happening, it was screaming for me not to open our bedroom door. I had to,  I had to prove it to my heart, that he really would do this too me. I exhaled slowly, pushing open the door.

I just stood there, my heart shattering as my marriage was destroyed. My appearance was not noticed, I used it to my advantage. Opening the closet, I grabbed my lock down bag. It was pre-packed with two weeks of clothes. 

 I saw the baseball bat, in the back of the closet, I grabbed it, walking over, I swung it at the bedside lamp, shattering it. The action of the bed stopped, I pulled off my wedding rings throwing them at Opie. “Don’t come after me! It’s over!” 

I grabbed the women by the head of the hair, and slammed her into the wall, I dropped her on the floor. I balled my hand into a fist, and broke her nose. “Stay away from married men, you whore!”

I picked up my bag, and never looked back.

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A Decision -Bittersweet.

I drown in emotions
As I’m about to take this flight
I’ll be away from all relations
After this travel at night

I’ll miss them all, every moment
Their tears’re asking me to stay
I’ll be in a land very foreign
And from my people, I’ll be far away

Alone in a foreign land
Among people I’ve never known
With a culture I don’t understand
Sleepless nights would be forlorn

I have no choice but to take this flight
I can’t turn weak right now
As this decision decides my future’s height
In front of the sentiments, I can’t bow

With my heart so heavy and face wiped off
I get ready to say goodbye
I hug them all with all my love
And then pick my luggage, ready to fly!

- @oneamateurgirl1612

badly translated rivers in the desert starters.

Based off of This.

“When.”

“I have decided to do.”

“A long time.”

“Fury? Chan, working hours?”

“Water, for living. Land.”

“He is a leader with a sense of humor.”

“Ghost.”

“Survival of the world,”

“I mean.”

“Very quickly, and yearly.”

“Listen to people facing a dark vision.”

“Why, you ask me the face ready for me ready.”

“First.”

“A new beginning has stairs.”

“Belo of our country. New life.”

“Fish.”

“Preheating oven to the heart.”

“One way to deal with it in my complaint.”

“Please do your mobile phone?”

“His anger, backing up his father.”

“I am ready to show you what he asked.”

“New Primary.”

“Yes, it may be water.”

“We understand the anger of female coach.”

“It’s new.”

“Several other forms…”

seeing per out on the pitch in an arsenal shirt after so long really gets me emotional. i’m so happy and so proud that he’s put so much work into coming back. and his latest quotes just make my heart burst:

Mertesacker played the final 37 minutes against Everton as a substitute and when asked if he was ready to play at Wembley, the 32-year-old replied: “I cannot tell you. I haven’t played this year.”

“But I have done this for 15 years so I expect myself to be absolutely ready no matter what comes.”

"That is my mindset, no matter what happens or what is facing me on Saturday, I am going to go for it.”

"I owe this to this team and to this club. I want to make sure I will be ready and my mindset is 120 minutes plus penalties.”

its Wednesday again, which means there’s only 2 days left until a new episode of PD101 and that means only 2 days left to prepare my heart for the eliminations and- I’M. NOT. READY.

My Last Game Experience

I saw the Last Game twice now in cinema.. the first time i saw it i was like a child in Christmas too happy to actually absorb things… however the ending still broke my heart… i saw the movie alone so i ended up crying at my Rakuzan Jacket holding my Nyanko-Sensei plushie.. until the very end i can’t stop the tears from that ending for Sei.. I thought after reading it too many times in the Manga i’ll be prepared but no… i was not ready…

The second time i watched it i was with friends..i actually started absorbing things like how flawed the match in my eyes.. how i think there is something else that can be done than that ending.. My friends kept looking at me too make sure that i am not a mess.. i thought i would be stronger because i saw it already but no.. i still ended up crying..

It was an amazing movie but too painful.. there are so many questions and so much growing up happened that my heart was not that ready..I somehow understand that it needs to happen.. they need to grow up and face life as it is.. but why? I think i will forever be in denial of that ending.

Thank you though.. Akashi was the most emotionally relatable character for me on the entire series.. his fears, longing, care, bravery and kindness will be forever remember.

Sayonara Kuroko No Basket.

submitted by @klainenific 

Realisation

I remembered today
it was a memory that sits heavy
that twists at you a little
leaves you unsteady.

I guess I wasn’t ready
as I held it with wonder
took a moment to ponder
as it cleaved me asunder.

As I staggered through consciousness
my figure feeling fitter
my mind was a flutter
heart beating quicker.

I couldn’t help but consider
the pain I’d undergo
if I had lived the moment
and not watched it on a show.

2

Doyoung “mom” protecting the kids 24/7  👨‍👦👦   

The Suicide Orphan

by reddit user Cymoril_Melnibone

I’ve long been fascinated by internet horror stories and creepypastas.

I was young and impressionable when I stumbled across my first; Jvk1166z.esp, a story about a video game mod that went eerily wrong. That tumbled me down a dark and narrow rabbit hole into The Russian Sleep Experiment, then further lost me in the cryptid wonderland where all those other internet classics live.

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kyliebunbury  My heart is heavy. 💔 
Pitch will not be returning. 
I don’t have some eloquently thought out caption, because I’m still processing it all. 
Ginny Baker has profoundly changed my life and I am so grateful to have had the opportunity to play a role that resonated with so many people. 
I wasn’t ready to let go of Ginny, but more than anything I wasn’t ready to let go of my Pitch family- the cast, crew, creators and writers, thank you for the magic. 
MOST IMPORTANTLY!!!- Thank you to all of the fans who took the journey with us! Your support and love for the show has always moved us deeply! I love you all. ❤️
Ginny Baker out ✌🏽⚾️