i was not expecting to see this picture as i was watching btw

ineptshieldmaid  asked:

Sam I have an important Chicago question: just north of the DuSable bridge there is a statue of what looks like Abe Lincoln excitedly taking a man in a knitted sweater on a first date. I only saw it from a bus, so didn't get either a photo or an explanation. Can you explain this phenomenon? Are Abe and Sweater Man happy???

*head in hands* FUCKING SEWARD JOHNSON

You have triggered the rage within me, so now you will ALL be treated to an outside-the-readmore screed about SEWARD GODDAMN JOHNSON. 

I don’t normally attack artists because a) it scares my friends who are artists (I love you all, you are beautiful, don’t be afraid) and b) honestly most artists don’t deserve the level of vitriol I’m about to employ. I want you all to remember that the seething hatred I feel for Seward Johnson is driven in large part by class consciousness. 

But not entirely. So let’s begin. 

First what you have to know is that Seward Johnson is a “sculptor”. If you google “seward johnson sculpture” you’ll get an idea of his work, most of which is terrible. I feel okay calling his work terrible because he is also the scion of the family that founded SC Johnson Johnson & Johnson (my bad), so he has all the money he needs and could step back, do his art for funsies, and let people with actual talent or two original thoughts in their heads exhibit their art, but he doesn’t, he forces his terrible art on all of us. 

The reason I harbor such animosity towards Seward Johnson is that he has been exhibiting on Pioneer Plaza (that area north of the DuSable Bridge) for almost a decade now, and when I worked in the north loop I had to walk past his art every day. It was bad enough when the sculpture was American Gothic, rendered without talent or meaning into three dimensions and provided with luggage. 

How very fucking dare you, you talentless hack

These things are sculpted out of what amounts basically to styrofoam painted in rubberized/weatherized paint, so they are fragile, and tourists were constantly climbing on Farmer’s shoes and falling into them when they found out it wasn’t the cheap but supple fiberglass you would expect of a tacky monstrosity more suited to a roadside motel than the business district of a major metropolitan city. (I would imagine this is why Abraham Lincoln And The Mayonnaise Sandwich has a little fence around it.) 

But American Gothic Motel Attraction was mostly just annoying because it was meaningless, derivative, and CONSTANTLY covered in gawkers getting in everyone’s way. 

Additionally, Seward Johnson’s sculptures on the Plaza are very popular photo spots for tourists, who carry lots of cash and are constantly distracted, which means beginning with The Assault On American Gothic it became a very popular spot for pickpockets. Which means members of our staff, who had nothing to do with this mess, got pickpocketed as collateral damage about once a week during the exhibition of…. 

Forever Marilyn.

SEWARD JOHNSON GO FUCK YOURSELF

This is a very famous image of Marilyn Monroe which is horrifying for the following reasons that Seward Johnson appears not to have understood nor cared about:

a) The day this was shot, on an open set with people leering at her all day, her husband, professional athlete and dirtbag Joe DiMaggio, found out about the filming. Rather than comfort his wife, who had been through some shit already that day, he became angry she’d been showing her panties in public and beat her so badly the neighbors called the police on him. Joe DiMaggio also go fuck yourself. 

b) IT’S IN A MOVIE INFAMOUSLY SET IN NEW YORK. To quote a local newspaper, “Did Chicago lose a bet?”

c) Yes, you can look up and see her panties. While this is juvenile, it’s not nearly as juvenile as the literally thousand of photographs I angrily photobombed of some douchebro from Fuckville Middle America in a backwards baseball cap standing between her legs with his face tilted upwards and his tongue out. 

Oh and btw before it was unveiled it looked like this: 

For literal days, before it was installed, she had a bag over her head. (For more on this, though the pictures are now missing, you can read my reaction post here.)

In any just world, there would be a trap door between her legs and everyone who tried to do the upskirt shot would fall into a pit where they would be forced to give five dollars to women’s shelters before they were allowed to leave. THAT would have been interesting art. 

Sidebar, both as contrast and because I love it: Marilyn left a few years ago and was briefly replaced by a refreshing and beautiful piece called The Watch, by Hebru Brantley. The Watch was playful and interesting and didn’t have a single upskirt. Hebru Brantley is a wonderful artist in his own right, but he was also a welcome breath of fresh air after Johnson’s mediocre tribute to sexual assault. 

The Watch was a temporary installation, however, and eventually along came Abraham Lincoln Approves Of White Men

It is an unfortunate coincidence that Confused Closeted Republican there is wearing khakis and a white shirt, the new uniform of the alt right, and it’s also coincidence that this is facing Trump Tower, but it’s not exactly helping Seward Johnson’s cause that he chose the blandest outfit possible for Paean To Confused White Bread. The sculpture is meant to be Lincoln, the darling of Illinois, welcoming a visitor to our fair city, but it sure does look like fresh meat is about to get a free trip to Boys Town with the Sixteenth President of the United States. 

This is what I mean when I say Seward Johnson lacks not only skill but also understanding: he clearly didn’t know that Lincoln’s sexuality is under enough debate to have its own wikipedia page, and he either didn’t know or didn’t care that Marilyn Monroe was nearly killed by her husband for shooting that scene. All he cares about is image and he’s bad at reproducing image. That is not a well-executed rendering of how human beings are, and dynamically speaking it’s boring. If he were good at visuals or if he had something meaningful to say I would be less angry, but he is mediocre at best and the statements his sculptures make are banal pap if they make any at all. 

But he is rich, and I guess either he likes Chicago or he’s got blackmail on Sam Zell, owner of Pioneer Plaza, so he gets to spatter his hideous, meaningless masturbation in my city. And lest you think Seward Johnson got here on his own merits, Forever Marilyn, now on tour from coast to coast, is owned by The Sculpture Foundation, which is heavily subsidized by Seward Johnson. He basically founded a nonprofit to ensure his work gets toured around and publicized and to ensure that if no museum wants it, it has a place to go to die (Palm Springs, CA). 

In short, I hope Abe and Sweater Man are happy, because at least then something good has come out of Seward Johnson’s astounding mediocrity. That said, if you are passing his latest work, spit on it for me. As performance art.

BTS Reaction: You get hit in front of them

A/N: This was requested a while back and finally finished it. I feel like it gets progressively worse as you go down, this isn’t my best writing, please excuse any mistakes. Our BTS requests are closed, but our Monsta X requests are still open! Thank you and enjoy! ~Emily

Masterlist Request

Can you please do a bts reaction about how they would react to you getting physically attacked either by a fan or someone? Love your blog btw!!


Jin:

Jin was not there when it happened. You had been running errands when you felt a tug at your arm. You turned around to find a teenage girl standing scanning your entire body. She began to say how big of a fan she was of BTS. You thought she was a sweet girl, up until she began to insult you and told you never get near Jin ever again. You got home to a missed call from Jin. You decided to message him, but he had already beat you to it. You don’t know how he found it what had happened, but he did. He was upset he couldn’t be there to help you and protect you.


Yoongi:

You had been out with Yoongi and Jungkook shopping. They walked into a store, but you decided to stay behind and rest for a while. You had been sitting when you began to hear camera clicks all around you. You turned your head to find a group of paparazzi taking pictures, you smiled and got up from your seat to find the boys. The moment they came out of the store the paparazzi ran. You had been a couple feet away from Yoongi when you felt a hand on you chest pushing you back and making you land on the cement. Yoongi was infuriated, his first instinct was to attack, but Jungkook held him back reminding him he was out in public, and eventually calmed himself down and checked on you.


Namjoon:

You had been out with Namjoon on a date. You had left the restaurant to get some fresh air, while Namjoon went to the bathroom. You were standing against the wall scrolling through your phone when you noticed someone standing in front of you. You noticed he was significantly younger than you. He began to ask you to leave with him to have “a good time” and eventually began pulling at you. Namjoon came out and eventually teaches you and the boy. “I’d love to hear the reason as to why a small boy is harassing my girlfriend.” said Namjoon as he got closer to the boy.


Hoseok:

You and the boys had gone out clubbing that night. The night was going on without a hitch. As the night went on you noticed one guy moving along the crowd to any girl at his reach. At one pint you had become his victim. He approached you, the scent of the alcohol he had been drinking was oozing off of him. He began to try and touch you. Every time you rejected him he got angrier, he’d had enough and yanked you towards him. Hoseok ran to you and pushed him off of you. The guy began trying to hit Hoseok, but he continued to dodge his attempts. The guy had aimed his swing to far and ended hitting you. You ended up on the floor cupping your cheek. Hoseok moved his eyes from you to the guy. “If you think I’m going to let you get way with punching my girlfriend, guess again.”


Jimin:

You had been on a midnight drugstore run with Jimin, buying basic necessities. You had been walking down the cereal aisle with him when you heard someone whisper Jimin’s name behind you. The both of you turned around to find a mid size girl with wide eyes. Jimin greeted her and you waited a couple feet back, scanning the the varieties cereal in front of you. It had been a couple minutes since Jimin had been talking to the fan so you decided to move to the next aisle, as you turned around you felt yourself collide into another body. “Watch where you’re going, idiot.” You looked up to find a man towering over you with a red face. “How about you watch where you’re going.” You turned your head to see Jimin behind you. You could tell he was holding himself back from lunging towards the man.


Taehyung:

It was not on purpose. You had been messing around with the boys. They had wanted to arm wrestle you. The results were as expected when it came to arm wrestling Namjoon, you won. The boys had gone crazy at your win that one of their hands made contact with your nose, making it bleed. Tae immediately jumped out his seat to help you up. “Tae, I swear it was an accident.” said Hoseok as he watched Tae’s face.


Jungkook:

You had been out and about during the day, looking for needed materials for your new apartment. You were walking looking through store windows when a fan came up to you. She politely asked you for a photo. You took the picture and she left. A couple minutes later you heard various whispers behind you, you turned around and saw about 40 girls with their phones out taking pictures of you. You waved and continued walking, you had thought the girls would leave, but they didn’t. They continued to follow you. You somehow ended up surrounded by all the girls. They began shoving their phones towards you trying to take pictures. The pushing became so harsh that somebody’s hand and phone made contact with your face. The girls continued pushing until they heard Jungkook’s voice in the distance. “I know you guys love her, but please be careful next time.”

s4, breaking the fourth wall, the arg, and gaslighting as literary device

And if the pretentious title didn’t frighten you away, or cause you to immediately unfollow / block me, I offer some thoughts:

Following the cues left by the hot mess s4, it’s reasonable to assert the following (which has been asserted just about non-stop since each of the episodes aired; I am not pretending to be original here):

  • s4 is fucky in a way that seems to call attention to its own fuckyness, especially if you take events and themes of the previous series as guidelines for what to expect / how things work in the world of Sherlock. (A ton of people have done a ton of work on this, but thanks to @antisocial-otaku​ for making it clear how frickin obvious this pattern is, here.)

As much as recent arg developments have been A Ride, I really think we’ve missed the obvious, because it wasn’t nearly as much of a challenge as people were looking for / as the fandom genius hive brain is capable of meeting. I think we’ve been looking too hard.

The puzzle, the thing we are supposed to figure out, is s4 itself. The game is simply this: we are invited to have discernment with regard to what is and what is not possible in the world of BBC Sherlock, and to conclude, as most people did, that much of s4 is, indeed, not compatible with the world of Sherlock. The truth of the narrative is in the subtext, as almost everyone here has argued.

The narrative of s4 is, for the most part, really hard to get hold of, and full of content that blatantly works against everything the show has tried to set up so far. As much as I appreciate attempts to make sense of s4 as is, my mind, like a lot of people’s, recoils when asked to consider (for example) that the people who wrote this:

.

Also wrote this:

.

You’ve all seen the evidence. You’ve all watched The Final Problem and thought–what the hell is this? 

People in this fandom were crying foul from the moment TST ended. I think we were already playing the arg then (if such a thing exists), and we kept playing it all through s4, because we were thinking critically about the episodes, and questioning the reality status of the story with which we were presented.

Up until recently, I would have said, meh, maybe this apparent lack of skill on the part of the showrunners was deliberate, maybe it wasn’t. Maybe they just threw in a ton of excess detail (like Mr. Glowy Skull) because why not? I am not very big on writerly intention. The text I’m presented with, I feel free to interpret however I wish, and this, to me, is the point of s4. It undoes itself. It undoes the text of series 1-3. It invites critique in a whole new way. Regardless of what does or does not happen next, I will always choose to question this narrative, to read against the text, because that reading is more interesting and less infuriating. s4, like mofftiss, lies. 

But.

The part that makes me think the arg is happening right in front of us, and it’s still live: 

This fucking thing.

This “John and Mary really love each other” barf festival video, released on 28 February. (Savage and efficient crit here, by @smoljohnlock​) 

WHY NOW?

I could see, maybe, that video flying as an s4 preview, but we have it released here, now, after…all that, when we know that the picture being presented in it is nowhere near the reality that we got in the narrative.

I don’t want to say it’s a sign. I don’t know, man. I’m tired. We’re all tired. But that video certainly did invite a renewal of the wtf-was-that outrage of s4, didn’t it?

The fourth wall, in my opinion, has already been broken. 

The show has been teaching us how to observe, and not just see, to think critically, and to look for solutions to puzzles, since the beginning. Now it’s turning the function of detective over to us. 

Just like the #sherlocklive game was designed to allow us to practice our puzzle solving on a small scale, so is s4. The entire narrative invites us to sit up, take notice, and say, come on, that can’t be how it really happened.

I’m still not going to predict the future here. The show has broken the fourth wall before, and paid off careful observation, via the “1895″ clues. It might be doing that with the “March 8″ billboard thing. It might not. When I say that the narrative is unfinished, I mean exactly that–it lacks an ending (much like my languishing WiPs…sorry about those, btw). What will happen next? Who knows? None of us. Signs (that’s literal, billboard-type signs) point to something more. 

BUT IS IT ART?

So: we have been presented with not one, but two false narratives. If mofftiss finish their damn story, and offer some sort of explanation for all the fuckery of s4, then we’ll have been told a bunch of lies in-story, about “what happened” to John and Sherlock, and a bunch of extratextual lies, about s4 being finished after three episodes. 

I will always assert, regardless of what happens next, that the in-story lies are there, and believing the textual level of the narrative makes less sense / is less happy making than believing that the story lies. As for the bigger lie, about the length of s4 / the end of this narrative–we’ll see. 

It’s a peculiar choice, this, as modern storytelling goes. Rather than just, you know, tell the story they wanted to tell, about a detective and his blogger, they’re really going the long way round. If the “s4 is fake” reading is confirmed, and there is a plan in place, it’s show-offy. It’s audacious. It’s gaslighting the audience to make a point. It’s putting us through an experience–the textual level content of s4–and asking us to believe something contrary to that experience. 

It’s not…enjoyable? Like with everything else, I think I’ll be left questioning why this way, and not some other way. It is, potentially, fascinating. 

If this is what we think it is, we’ve been playing all along, without even trying.

Tags under the cut.

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Don’t Look Back (ACOTAR AU) - Part 1

This is the ACOTAR high school AU no one asked for. This was highly inspired by @highlady-casandra and her fic We Are Young (which was amazing btw). Similar to her fic, it will be multi-POV ranging from nearly all the main ACOTAR characters, therefore although it is focusing on Feysand, Cassian, Az, Mor and Lucien will all have their own minor story lines.

Summary: It’s senior year and everyone is fighting battles they do not want to face. Toxic relationships, conservative parents and alcohol are a bad mix. Quite frankly a recipe for disaster.

I really hope you enjoy! (I have basically written the whole thing, so if there’s any interest I will post the next chapter ASAP <3)

PART 2PART 3Part 4PART 5, PART 6PART 7, PART 8, PART 9 PART 10 , PART 11, PART 12, PART 13, PART 14, PART 15, PART 16, PART 17, PART 18Part 19


“Lucien, he can’t start dictating our lives,” sighed Feyre, picking at her half eaten sandwich from the crappy canteen.  “We need to do something, even if it means tying him to a chair and making him listen to us.”

This very particular corner of the library was well hidden and mostly unused, which was to the advantage of Feyre and Lucien’s current predicament. For about two weeks now, instead of eating on the field watching football training, him and his best friend would resort to hiding in the back of a library during lunch hours. Though seemingly extreme measures, they agreed that it was to get some space from the rest of the school, but they both knew it was to avoid one person.

“I’m just worried about him, ever since his mum died, he’s been…different,” Lucien took a bite from his apple, the noise sounding louder than it was in the quietness of the library.

Feyre leaned over the table they were eating lunch on, more wisps of hair falling out of her messy bun. “He has started looking through my phone, checking my messages, my pictures. It’s like he’s expecting me to cheat on him.”

“What!?” Feyre nodded in confirmation. This was getting worse than Lucien thought. His childhood best friend was making it increasingly more difficult for Feyre and himself in supporting him. It was growing difficult in even being around him, when he was constantly snapping at them, telling them what to do and what not to do. They only had each other to voice their concerns, which did not help the rumours nor said persons paranoia.

Feyre slumped back in her chair, “Well we can’t keep hiding from him in this damn library. We have to confront him- somehow.”

Lucien nodded in agreement before changing the subject that was becoming a burden on their lives. “Can I come round yours to study tonight?”

A glint of anger reached Feyre’s eyes, “Are they being bastards again?”

“They’re always bastards,” Lucien said, referring to his severely dysfunctional family where his father hated him, his mum didn’t care and his brothers made it their goal to make everyday a living hell.

“You’re always welcome at mine, you know that,” Feyre replied, reaching forward to squeeze his hand. He was grateful, as he knew Feyre’s family dynamic was far from functional too. 

“Well ain’t that cute, looks like your girlfriend and your best friend are having a secret affair in the library every lunchtime,” said Bron, who approached with what seemed to be a furious looking Tamlin by his side. They simultaneously rose from their seats, inwardly preparing for the oncoming storm.

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Kang Daniel | Soulmate!AU | Taste

Originally posted by kngniel

prompt: when you aren’t eating anything, you taste whatever your soulmate tastes.

note: this was inspired by me actually waking up to the taste of toothpaste and gummy worms lmao.

Keep reading

**(I don’t know why my other post the gif doesn’t move T_T )

170721 KBS Music Bank - EXO Comeback stage KOKOBOP..

SOMETHING BIG JUST HAPPENED ON TODAY’S MUSIC BANK!! 

We might be witnessing the event where Park Chanyeol and Byun Baekhyun boldly flirting on live TV..! 

Byun Baekhyun FREAKING did THAT on NATIONAL TELEVISION ..!!

watch closely.. After Baekhyun did that kissy face to Chanyeol, he looked behind the camera.. as if he is checking whether or not the camera is filming him.. Baekhyun knows that Chanyeol saw him.. Chanyeol saw his signal.. and if you noticed, Baekhyun keep looking at chanyeol, waiting for his reply.. 

you could clearly see that Park Chanyeol is shocked..! I don’t think he expected Baekhyun to do that THERE..!! At first i thought maybe they are hinting each other for something they are supposed to do or say or maybe Chanyeol is just teasing Sehun, but DUDE.! 

Park Chanyeol is freaking look at Baekhyun when he puckered his lips..!! They locked eyes when Chanyeol did that.. and that nods afterwards tho.. WTF..!?! watch the 1st gif again.. Look at the big picture.. 

Chanyeol replied Baekhyun’s “flying kiss” and he even waited for Baekhyun to nod - signaling that he received it..!!! 

GUYS..!! THIS IS HUGE..!! At least for me idk about you guys.. They are being bold again.. and this is very unfamiliar for me.. coz I thought Chanbaek already passed that phase.. That phase where they are careless, bold and clingy and sweet, whining to each other, being SOFT.. 

I noticed that Chanbaek had been very gentle and soft and sweet lately tho.. ever since the new era started.. eventho i kinda miss them like this, like they were few years back, but now, its kinda weird and scary at some point.. this is  so not like them.. they are not this whipped and careless.. they could be very obvious sometimes but not like this.. ITS A LIVE SHOW ON NATIONAL TV! And its Baekhyun who started it..?? I know many people gonna argue about this saying “Baekhyun always is fearless and bold” but thats not the Baekhyun I’m used to.. 

so Firelights.. I don’t know if i can ever moved on from this huhuhu, but so far this is the 2nd most obvious and bold moment Chanbaek ever done (in my personal opinion) besides the footsie.. lol.. and no.. its not like i dont like this thing they did, of course i like it, just its so sudden.. I got dumbfounded by it.. hehehe.. 

p/s: btw this is the original video ^_^


sleep tight fam ^_^ 

(As always, you can find all my fic recs in my FIC REC MASTERPOST) 

- Feels Like Coming Home , by @phd-mama : The last thing Harry Styles expects when he’s hanging out at the Someday Cafe in Somerville one rainy October day is for his ex, Louis Tomlinson to walk through the door, but that’s exactly what happens. After a spectacularly ugly break-up three years prior, Harry hasn’t heard one word from Louis, and he’s moved on. Gotten over him. But having Louis back in his life, not to mention working at the restaurant where he’s a chef, isn’t easy, and the feelings that Harry thought he’d left turn out to be not so easily forgotten. This is a story about love and the power of forgiveness, and how the hard choices we make define us, and change our lives.

Larry ex to lovers AU (60k) : OOMMMGGGGGG this is the best angst fic I read for a long time !! Very well written, absolutely painful and beautiful, maybe some TW (read the tags) , but really really read this now. (kind of share that for the smut, awesome btw)

- When We Were Younger , by @waytoomanypeopleintheaddisonlee : About a week after Harry started visiting this particular chat room, he was watching some kid argue with the whole room about football, personally disinterested as he tipped a bag of crisps into his mouth. He happily chomped on the crumbs, taking a swig from a glass of Ribena to wash them down, glancing at the screen and very nearly spat the squash back out again. His heart was pounding wildly. The display icon of the argumentative newcomer had caught his eye, and not in a good way. He gulped as he clicked the picture, and when it popped up in full resolution, his heart nearly fell right out of his arse. - Sixteen year old Harry Styles’ world turns upside down when he logs on to gay teen chat to discover somebody has stolen his photos and used them as their own.

Larry Catfish AU (76k) : starting with teenage Harry and going on for a few years of a online/phone relationship. Very well done ! angsty and (obviously) full of phone sex :D (kind of share that)

- Save your loving arms for a rainy day , by @briannamarguerite : “What’s got your panties in a twist, then, pop star?” the man finally asked, his gaze returning to Louis’ face. Something pressed against Louis’ chest and for a moment Louis let himself wonder what it would be like to let all his secret spill out. To fall into the space between them and be devoured by this stranger. Terror mingled with bliss, tangling into a sharp throb he had to swallow hard against. “Absolutely nothing,” Louis said instead. “Happy days, yeah?”The man clicked his tongue once, a disappointed, wet tetch that Louis felt. Actually felt. “My mistake.”Louis turned desperate eyes on him, blinking too fast. He could see his own lashes flutter. “I’m living the dream, mate” he said and even he could hear the way his voice cracked along the edges. “What would I have to be upset about?”–Or the one where Louis is a pop star who has lost his voice and Harry helps him find it.

Larry famous-not famous AU (19k) : singer Louis and record-shop Harry, a bit angsty, some good smut (bottom Louis) and songwriting,  very well written !

- Your Love Was Handmade , by @inked-withlove : There must be a rule book describing in detail how you proceed from being best friends to lovers. That’s what Louis thinks. But maybe, there isn’t a need, Harry decides. Maybe you just follow your instinct and…run your finger down your best friend’s bare back. That should seal the deal for sure.Or, Harry and Louis are best friends who are also mutually pining, and when a work trip looms in to separate the two of them for three weeks, they finally get their shit together.

Larry BFF to lovers AU (5k) : BFFs who share a apartment  and are pining on each other are my kind of shit. Just a bit of smut.

- Perfect Storm , by @cherrystreet​: What do you do when your best friend asks you and your (now) ex to be the best men at his destination wedding? You can either tell him the truth, tell him you’re not together anymore, and deal with the consequences, or you can pretend you’re still together and roll with it, just pray you don’t spiral. Fake it ‘til you make it. You know, for the sake of the wedding.Harry and Louis choose the latter.

Larry ex to lovers and fake relationship with a twist AU (80k) : angsty (but not THAT much), smutty (hello angry sex)(botyom Louis) and awesome :)

- You’re My Favorite Bird , by @supernope : Harry sets his hands on the counter and leans over them, looks Louis in the eye and says, “Louis, would you like to go bird watching with me?”Louis just blinks at him for a moment, like he’s not sure how to respond, then says, voice slow and unsure, “Is that a euphemism?”  Also known as: Harry is an ornithologist and Louis owns the camera repair shop where Harry gets his photos printed. Niall works for Louis, Liam works with Harry, and Zayn paints. There’s a cat, some camping, some bird watching, and obscene amounts of fluff.

Larry AU (33k) : Ornithologist-Photographer Harry, a lot of pining, some great smut (bottom Harry) , and kudos for the tattoos.

- Down For The Count And I’m Drowning And I’m Helpless  , by  patdkitten : “Staring costs extra, mate,” he says, perfectly cheeky. Harry didn’t know he found cheek sexy, but it’s definitely a turn on. He’s working up a response, turn on the Harry Styles trademark charm, when he hears a small whirring sound. Somehow, in his approach, Harry’d missed the ears perched on the barista’s head. Now that he’s aware of them, though, the dark brown fuzzy ears tipped in black twitch in his direction with another quiet whir. They remind him of the maid cafe he went to once in Japan, but while they hadn’t been attractive to him there, on this barista, they’re as sexy as the cheek.Yeah, Harry could definitely use a booty call. Maybe if he’s lucky, the barista’s getting off soon and would be interested in getting off with him…? He can dream, at least.— Harry Styles is an international pop star who suffers from insomnia, and Louis is the sassy little barista in fox ears and tail that won’t get out of Harry’s head. And the sexting is pretty damn great, too.

Larry Coffe Shop AU and Famous/not famous (5k): popstar Harry and sassy barista Louis, no smut.

- Love Is a Kitten from Hell      by  Anonymous : Louis Tomlinson passes himself off as an arrogant prick at his new school to hide the fact that he’s terrified of being bullied again. Just when he’s getting tired of putting up walls, he finds himself in a local pet shop where he finds a sanctuary playing with the kittens in the front window.Harry Styles is the popular football player who works at the pet shop, secretly watching the boy he thought was utterly unlikable prove him wrong. Partnered together for a class project, Harry gets more and more hints that Louis is actually someone worth getting to know. But the real question is, will Louis let Harry in?

Larry High school AU (8k) : cute and fluffy, with no smut.

Live Stream (Kian Lawley)

(Y/N pov)
I feel a vibration in my pocket and pull out my phone

kianlawley started a live video

I smile and slide over the notification opening my phone with my finger print, just to see my goofball of a boyfriend on the screen.
“Y/N’s on the livestream, heeyyyyyy” his voice comes through my phone.

“Hi kian, why are you live? You never go live.”
I type into the rapidly flowing comment section. I see Kian set his phone down and start to stare at the comments.

“Hi…why are you…” I hear him mumble under his breath, he’s reading my comment.

Since I’m verified and we follow each other, it’s quite easy for him to pick out my comment from the other 191,738.

“Because I want to Y/N, DO SUMMTHIN BOUT IT!” He says in a silly tone making weird hand gestures. I can see him holding back a smile

“Alright guys what should I do on here?” “A challenge, a dareee, read a buuuhhhk, show ya some baybee pictures” kian says in a few of those funny voices he does “ooohh wait actually look at this, it’s a picture of me and my baby” he takes a pause to hold up the picture of us on our one year anniversary “is she still on here?” He questions focusing on the comments

“Aww my love, you look dashing😻”
I type rapidly, a wide smile on my face

“Not as beautiful as you babe” kian says smiling “ALRIGHT WHAT SHOULD I DO??” He says while clapping his hands loudly once.

“Siiiinnngggg” I comment,
I know that’ll get him mad. He hates when people ask him to sing

As he’s reading all the comments he says “No Jc’s not home I can’t do that, no Y/N isn’t here she’s literally watching the live *chuckle*, NO EVERYBODY I cannot pull any pranks I’m home alone right now!” He says once he catches the trend of the comments. Then mine comes across the screen, I can tell he sees it when his eyes widen “Oh geez” he exclaims “why the fuck would you comment that babe” he says rubbing his face with the palms of his hands

Then the comments start rolling in, “sing sing sing”
“omg yesss kian sing”
“DADDY SING FOR ME👅😩”
“we love your voice c'mon :( for us😚??”
“THANK YOU Y/N, YALL ARE CUTE ASF BTW”

“Okay okay okay, I hate Y/N for this. I’m just kidding I love her” he says grabbing the phone and holding the camera so we could see from his face down to his torso.

“Don’t be afraid baby :) I and almost 200,000+ people are cheering you on rn! <3”
I type into the phone, he sees it right away and sighs. I can tell his anxiety is kicking in.

“Ok guys I’m gonna put the camera facing the ceiling because I don’t want y'all to see my face… haha” he says “gosh I can’t believe I’m doing this” he says under his breath
“I’m gonna sing like a quick excerpt of a song because I am leaving in about 10 minutes….” he drags off
He’s coming over to my place.

“Ok guysss,” he starts as he places the camera down so the only view is a snippet of his brown locks. I hear him take a deep breath, so low you had to be reeeeaaalllyyyy listening to hear it. The sound of him gulping water went through the speakers briefly, he clears his throat and starts


“Our friends would all make fun of us and we’ll just laugh along because we know that none of them have felt this way, ooooohhhhhhh it’s what you do to meeeeee. Ooooooohhhh what you do to me….” he drags on the last note
(video here: https://wonderfuldolans.tumblr.com/post/161547385172/fatimateodoro-stockholmsyndromstyles-and)

All positive comments rolling in, “omg I didn’t know he could sing that well!!”
“THATS SO FUCKING HOTTTTTTT”
“THANK THE LORD FOR KIAN LAWLEY” etc.

Kian moves the phone back up to its standing position. His cheeks are flushing red.

I decide to text him rather than comment
To, My babykian😍: “Hey baby I just wanted to let you know that your voice is beautiful and you blessed my ears love, ❤️❤️you’re so talented. Love you!! Had to say this NOT in front of 200,000 people lol”

I go back to the live to see that Kian has paused it, right then I get a text back

From, My babykian😍: “thank u baby❤️ that means the most comin from u😚✌🏼, I was so fucking nervous 😂 I don’t sing like that, ever.”

Kian then after a few seconds proceeds with the live, responding to a few fan comments, thanking them, etc.

I decide to comment anyways
“That was amazing my dear, and blush looks good on you ;). NOW COME OVER SO I CAN KISS YOU” I comment

Kian sees my comment and chuckles, “yea guys I do actually have to go now, I hope you liked that because I’m not doing that EVER AGAIN” he exclaims

“It’s alright y'all I’ll make him do it again ;)” I quickly type, all the comments agreeing with me/thanking me.

“Alright I love you all and I’ll try to do this live thing again soon but now I’m gonna go see my baby” kian says

“Love you my sweet boy, drive safe!” I comment lastly

“I will Y/N, alright everyone thanks for watching me be stupid for a few minutes, love you guyssssssssssss…” kian says as he ends the broadcast. Leaving me with the brightest smile on my face, that boy really is something special.

My phone then vibrates, a text from kian.

From, My babykian😍: “I’m expecting a serious reward upon my arrival 😏” I read

Ohhh boy.

anonymous asked:

Okay one I love you! And I love everything that you write! I always check on here 😂 Can you do a chocobros x reader trying on their bf clothes or cosplaying? Btw you are awesome! Okay bye! x3

Awww, I love you too! This is seriously one of my favorite things! Couples exchanging clothes are super cute and I’m all about it all the time!

~~~~~

Noctis

One of your favorite things to do was to sit with Noctis while he was fishing. His arms wrapped tightly around you, as he held the rod, and the moment that he felt a tug the two of you would work together to bring the fish to shore. Yet you had never expected to suddenly be torn from the docks and sent splashing into the water below.

“You okay in there?” Noctis asked, knocking on the bathroom door, you had currently been in there for the last 45 minutes attempting to scrub the smell of lake and fish off of you.

“Yeah, I’ll be out in a second.” You called, looking to the mess of black clothes before you. Sharing a suitcase with your boyfriend, you had realized that at this time Ignis must have taken both of your clothes to be washed with the others, and the only clean outfit you had available now was one of Noctis’s.

Looking up from his phone, Noctis was shocked to see you in his clothes. You had worn his jackets multiple times, and even on some occasions, you’d steal a shirt to sleep in. Yet to see you in the full attire the Prince was known for, you looked so cute.

“Sorry, I had to steal your clothes sweetie, I think Iggy is doing a load of land-eee!” You squeaked as he embraced you tightly, nuzzling into your shoulder. “Noct?”

Keep reading

My Top 10 Anime Ships/OTPs

[Possible Spoilers]

This is really late. So sorry for my usual tardiness! T.T Thank you to @lemonadethefifth and @rays-of-fire-and-ice for tagging me! I guess I’m going to have to make mini-essays/explanations again, huh… Challenge accepted! XD

NOTE: There are shows here that I haven’t watched for a long time now, so I may forget some things or even make mistakes. If so, please feel free to inform me of them!

[A fangirl with messy english coming your way!]


10. Vampire Knight: ZeKi [Zero Kiryuu & Yuuki Cross]

The first time these two were introduced, I immediately took a liking to them. With Yuuki’s cheerful and outgoing personality, she balanced out Zero’s seriousness and no-nonsense personality. I even loved the way they bickered!

When Yuuki found out about Zero being a vampire, she was scared at first, but she slowly accepted him for who he was. It was a nice transition, to be honest. Yuuki, the one who was afraid of vampires because of her encounter with one of them when she was little, began to protect Zero, someone whom she had been with for years, even though he became the kind of specie she was afraid of. I’ve always loved slow burn, and I associate it with this pair sometimes. They just have this appealing, mysterious aura about them, and whenever they interacted with each other, I felt the tension and excitement pounding along with my heartbeat.

I still haven’t finished the manga, but I will someday. :)


9. Ouran High School Host Club: KaoHaru [Kaoru Hitachiin & Haruhi Fujioka]

Haha, yup. Not Hikaru, but Kaoru. The less brash twin, the one who thinks things through a bit more. I’ve always shipped him with Haruhi, particularly because I feel that their personalities would complement each other more. Like the other non-canon pairs I ship, KaoHaru has potential.

I’m not sure if it’s Kaoru in this panel (because I’ve never read the manga),

but here’s a scene of them together. I had a hard time finding pictures of them together. They’re not that popular after all. :’(

Perhaps what appealed me towards them is that they don’t have much scenes together. I actually often notice pairings who stand in the background. XD But seriously, I really think they would’ve been cute together!


8. Fruits Basket: YukiRu [Yuki Sohma & Tohru Honda]

Still bittersweet over this pairing. I never got to finish the manga, mainly because I felt that it was wearing me out (not because my ship didn’t happen, mind you XD). To be honest, I’m still surprised why I like them. Like some people say, if they ended up together, they would’ve been a boring couple (not like Kyo and Tohru, who are apparently more exciting). However, for me, there’s hidden potential in this pairing. I would’ve liked to see Yuki bringing out his cold side towards Tohru and distance himself from her, while Tohru would be all confused why Yuki was suddenly acting like that. Kinda like a slow burn. I don’t know, but that’s what I would write. 😂 What I don’t understand, though, is why Yuki suddenly thought of her as a mother figure… I mean… huh…? Maybe I missed something? Because that train of thought from him seems so… misplaced…

Anyway, I still ship them no matter what. <3


7. Gakuen Alice: RukaRu [Ruka Nogi & Hotaru Imai]

SHIPPING THESE TWO IS FRUSTRATING. They don’t have much scenes together (though they are always drawn side-by-side) and they have very little interactions. That New Year’s chapter wherein they got stuck together was literally a brief piece of heaven for me.

I love Hotaru blackmailing Ruka. I also like how they can be bickering together one moment and then become serious in the next. For me, there’s just so much potential in this pairing that I want to scream. I‘ve devoured every fanfic of these two and I still crave for more. I’d do anything to read a doujinshi about them. Anything at all! T.T

This art by the author made me less frustrated, though:

But I still want more of them! (He’s not even looking at her 😭)

Sigh. I’ll probably write a multi-chapter fic about them sooner or later once I get too frustrated…


Honorable Mention: NatsuMikan [No explanations needed; their meeting was fated, and they go well together. Natsume’s a bit too forward for my taste, though, lol (plus the fact that he was only twelve years old back then). However, I still like their chemistry together! The slow burn was really great!]


6. Card Captor Sakura: SyaoSaku [Li Syaoran & Kinomoto Sakura]


[Btw, is this an official art? If this is a fanart, tell me and I’ll take it down.]

…I cannot even believe that I was so giddy over a pair of ten-year-olds. I was in high school when I started watching CCS, and I never expected to become so invested in watching it.

Syaoran started out as someone who was relatively mean to Sakura. He was like a bully at that time, lol. I didn’t think much of their relationship in those moments, but I thought that they were cute. Typical children’s antics, as one might say.

But when Syaoran started developing feelings for her, that was when I exploded from cuteness. Ohh gosh, I literally squealed over them. Me, who was fifteen years old at that time. Me, who was often teased by my friends and classmates as an emotionless person.

(watching CCS)

Mom: Rei…? Are you… giggling…?

Me: ………….No, I’m not. (pokerfaced)

That’s about the gist of it, haha!


Honorable Mention: EriTomo [I just find them really cute together. Also, their personalities complement each other well!]


5. One Piece: LuNami [Monkey D. Luffy & Nami]

One Piece isn’t about romance, and I strongly feel that Oda is not even planning on placing some sure hints about the ones who’ll end up together at the end of series. I like One Piece because of the story, not because of this pair (that I love so much). However, it’s nice to see a lot of scenes of them together. <3

From what I’ve seen/heard, I think they’re the most hated(?) pairing in One Piece. Hmm. What I like about them is their dynamic. I think what most of us can agree on is that the two of them trust each other very much. This particular fact is emphasized back when Nami betrayed the crew at the beginning of the series. She stole the ship, the treasure, left them behind while they fought against a strong enemy… yet Luffy still wanted her on his crew. That no one can be the navigator except for her. He disagreed with Zoro’s negative remarks about her and looked for her until they came to a stop on her hometown.

The scene that drew me to them is the hat scene. Yes, that iconic hat scene. For me, it was beautiful. Luffy treasured his straw hat so much and didn’t want anyone to touch it except for him. However, when he saw Nami crying and asking for his help for the first time, he had no qualms about placing it on top of her head. Then he proceeded to beat up a guy he didn’t even know much. He practically defeated Arlong with all he had not mostly because of the man’s treatment of the villagers, but because of the reason that he made “his navigator” cry.

…I will forever go down with this ship.

(Also, I LOVED THAT HUG AKSFNOAIGEIU)


4. Final Fantasy VII: CloTi [Cloud Strife & Tifa Lockhart]

In my personal opinion, they’re canon. Advent Children, On the Way to A Smile: Case of Tifa, and the original game itself confirmed it for me.

Cloud and Tifa were depicted to be childhood friends, yet in reality, they weren’t actually very close back then. It seemed, though, that Cloud had a crush on Tifa. It was really cute and sad at the same time, because Tifa had her own circle of friends while Cloud had no one. I don’t think Tifa ever ignored him, though(?).

This pair gets to me because of their tendencies to keep their actual feelings from each other. Tifa was confused about the Cloud who led AVALANCHE to defeat Sephiroth because of his mixed-up memories, yet she never asked him about them and only watched from the sidelines, possibly waiting for an opportunity to learn what the truth really was. Cloud, on the other hand, was a bit confident on the outside, yet was also actually confused deep inside about who he was.

But then the Lifestream scene happened. Tifa got to see the real Cloud inside his consciousness and proceeded to help him fix himself together. This particular conversation struck me in the feels (forgive the inconsistent image sizes; I only googled them):

Tifa: “Someone has to notice you…? …Who?” 

I would say more, but I don’t want this to be a really long essay. XD So yeah, this is why I love them!


Honorable Mention: YuffEntine [This pair… Oh gosh, this is kind of a crack pairing, but I am just drawn to them in a way that I can’t fully understand. Vincent, the brooding individual, and Yuffie, the hyperactive teenager… My shipper senses are tingling like crazy! XD I can’t wait to see their HD interactions in the remake! <3]


3. Fairy Tail: NaLu [Natsu Dragneel & Lucy Heartfilia]

Words cannot express how obsessed I was over this ship back then. My first fanfic on FFN was of them as well as several others. I downloaded hundreds of fics about them, searched a lot of fanarts, and squealed over every scene they had in each episode. NaLu had been my online focus when I was in high school. These days, my great liking of them diminished a bit (because I haven’t read the manga for a while). However, I still ship them so much!

It was kinda frustrating that Natsu often seemed dense, especially regarding Lucy (does he know how many times he has made her blush? XD), but that’s a part of his character, I guess, and I admit that it’s also one of the reasons why I ship them so much. They’re always together because they’re close friends, and whenever they somehow teeter towards the line above friendship, I literally wanted to jump up and down in excitement! But then it would always come down to a comical scene, though, haha! Typical NaLu.

Ahh, that hug. I’ll remember it forever. <3


Honorable Mentions: MiraXus [That scene with Mira getting angry at Laxus will always get to me.] & LyVia […don’t ask me why. I just find their chemistry so adorable. I would’ve loved more scenes of them together!]


2. Bleach: IchiRuki [Kurosaki Ichigo & Kuchiki Rukia]

If I was obsessed with NaLu, I was just as much as obsessed with IchiRuki. Heck, before Bleach even ended, I already started writing a rewritten version of the manga with IR as the definite end pairing (because I thought back then that Kubo would give Bleach an open ending… guess I was wrong) as well as a Bleach Movie fic with Ichiruki as a pairing as well. 😂 Damn, I was really addicted to this pair…

What I love about this ship is that their relationship is unique. Like Kubo stated: “more than friends, but less than lovers”. They’re placed somewhere in between, and for me, that’s a special thing. They have a label of their own that isn’t limited by the terms romance and mere friendship. It can also be interpreted as something like: “they’re right in the middle of two boundaries; once one of them figuratively trips, their relationship becomes a new, different meaning altogether”. I’m not going to rant on and on about them (because there are far better metas that explain their dynamics amazingly) so I’ll stop it here.

Even though they didn’t become canon, they will always be canon in my heart! <3


Honorable Mention: HitsuHina [Always-frowning-and-serious Hitsugaya being overly protective of his childhood friend? Threatening someone if they made her bleed, promising to kill someone after they did her harm both physically and emotionally? This ship hits me right in the heart. <3 It’s just a shame there’s not much of them in the ending. I would’ve given anything for them to have a scene together, or even just talk! It’s been long overdue. T.T]


1. Naruto: SasuSaku [Uchiha Sasuke & Haruno Sakura]

Ahh, SasuSaku. The very first anime pairing I shipped, and what an awesome thing that they ended up together in the end! Happy days! <3

Others often have misconceptions about this pairing. For me, though, it’s a pretty simple thing. It was already obvious to me at the beginning that they would end up together, especially after that Forest of Death scene. That scene highlighted the start of Sakura’s character development and it also showed Sasuke’s care for her as a teammate. I mean, why else would he go on a (for the lack of a better word) rampage after seeing her so beaten up?

I personally believe/headcanon that Sasuke began to really love Sakura in the Blank Period. It’s just that he already built a foundation for the two of them way back then. It was fairly obvious that he grew to care for her, after all. I think the forehead poke signified the beginning of him seeing her differently. (Just my own opinion, though)

And, to address a bit of a sensitive issue… Their relationship isn’t toxic. I know it very well. “Toxic” is not a word that should be used lightly. If their relationship is “toxic” then they shouldn’t have ended up together. They shouldn’t have so many fans. It’s just that simple to me. :)

Sasuke’s behavior in Shippudden is not who he really is. The real Sasuke is the one who Team 7 saved, who Naruto himself saved from the Curse of Hatred. The real Sasuke is the one who started smiling genuinely in Chapter 698.

Ahh, I’m rambling again, so I’ll stop right here once more. Anyway, there may be many who hate SasuSaku, but there are also many who love them to the core. We all have different, varying opinions about every pairing. Let’s just not spread so much hate. :)


Tagging @aubreycanalaine to make a list like this. Haha! (Because I know how much you hate writing essays, lol)

anonymous asked:

For your AU post! I LOVE secretly married Aus, so how about one of those? I'm thinking IronPanther, maybe? Or IronFalcon! One of those (first one would be preferred, but both are great!), they've known each other much longer than in canon (obviously) and for some reason their relationship get's made public/ the other avengers find out?

Oh man do I enjoy Secretly Married AUs!! The drama, anon. The drama. Also fluff. Please fluff because unhappy endings break my heart. Anyways, I like both pairings, so I’m just gonna go with IronPanther. Btw this turned into a Post CW ficlet that focuses mostly on Tony and T’Challa, I hope that’s alright!


It happens on their fifteen year anniversary because of course it does. The universe refuses to grant them a single moment of peaceful happiness after all. Looking back Tony really doesn’t know how he didn’t see this coming.

And it’s so unfair because the last six months have been hard on the both of them. The last two years, to be honest. With the whole Civil War mess, T’Chaka’s death, the fighting and betrayal–well, Tony wishes he could say he was able to keep those events from affecting his marriage, but that would be nothing more than wishful thinking. The first time they had been fighting side by side and T’Challa had been in too much pain, too blinded by his desire for revenge for him to enjoy the moment, never mind that he’d been fighting against half his team. Then there was the matter of Siberia, of his husband taking Rogers and Barnes with him and leaving Tony behind and-

There’s a hand on his shoulder, warm and grounding, the pleasantly familiar sound of T’Challa’s voice, talking to him, slowly drowning out the ugly thoughts in Tony’s head.

He takes a shaky breath, blinks, meets his husband’s worried gaze. “Sorry,” he thinks he mumbles, and wishes the trembling would stop already.

It hasn’t been a good day. Not after someone–the Dora Milaje are already looking into it–leaked those pictures of them to the international press. Tony wants to laugh, but it ends up coming out as more of a hysterical sob.

Fifteen years. They’ve managed to keep their marriage a secret for fifteen years. Sure, they have been times they both wished the hiding would stop, but there had never quite been the right moment to announce it, and now? After everything? They were still trying to do damage control with the fall-out from the Accords, Tony honestly isn’t sure whether there could have been much of a worse moment for this to be revealed.

Forget the UN and Ross for a moment, how would Rogers and his little band of followers take the news? Their presence in Wakanda couldn’t become known,  at this stage it might lead to an actual war against the country and-

“Hush, my heart,” T’Challa’s voice rings strong and clear in Tony’s ears, and he allows himself to sink back into his husband’s arms, until his head is resting against T’Challa’s chest, listening to the rhythmic heartbeat.

“What are we gonna do?” Tony whispers, hopeless and worried and so, so, tired.

“We will figure something out,” T’Challa replies without hesitation, cards his hand through Tony’s hair. “Our marriage is not something I have ever been ashamed of, beloved, nor should we be. It is a bond of joy and love, that should be honoured. Ultimately there is nothing anyone can do. We have broken no laws, nor do we owe the world an explanation. And I will be glad to walk proudly by your side, instead of watching you across yet another hall.“

Almost against his will, Tony can feel himself relaxing, soaking up the utter calmness T’Challa exudes, the easy confidence soothing his frayed nerves. Rationally he knows they have faced much, much worse, knows that even though things aren’t gonna be easy, this particular issue will eventually be solved–but T’Challa makes him believe it, without hesitation or doubt.

“Love you,” he says into the high-quality shirt he’s burrowed his face in–it’s so soft too, Tony approves of his husband’s taste–because he can’t think of anything else to say. Most people would describe Tony as ‘incapable of shutting up’ but when it comes to his personal relationships, he has never been the most articulate.

The arms around him tighten, and he can hear T’Challa’s smile in his responding, “I love you too, my heart.”

“Be at ease for now, we will deal with this issue later. And get you to a hair dresser as soon as possible,” he adds after a moment, teasingly pulls on a strand of Tony’s admittedly rather unruly hair. 

A cut hasn’t been on his mind for months, and he can’t help laughing–at T’Challa’s antics, the situation, everything. He doesn’t need to look up to know that this has been T’Challa’s intention from the start, simply squeezes his hand in silent appreciation.

They’ve got this. They really do.

[The confrontation with the rogue Avengers is as ugly as T’Challa has expected it to be. The only positive side of this is that Tony isn’t anywhere near to hear the commotion, T’Challa might have been forced to kill someone otherwise. As it is, there isn’t much to be said about it, in the end. His marriage isn’t a recent thing, it doesn’t change the actual situation. Not that you’d believe as much, if you listen to Clint Barton’s poisonous rant. At least Captain Rogers’ indignant rant is silenced with a sharp reminder that trust only reaches as far as it is extended.

“Your mind is your own, but any insult against my husband is an insult against myself. I suggest you keep that in mind!” has been the only warning T’Challa is willing to grant them. His patience isn’t limitless and certain guests have been testing those limits for some time now.]

So there’s a thing that happens in every fandom and bothers me in every fandom, and in SKAM I feel like I can go “this specifically is why it bothers me” so I’m going to talk about it for a bit.

That thing is that once an m/m pairing gets to a certain level of popularity, at some point it apparently becomes more or less “widely accepted fanon” that one of them is the more or less (recently more more than less) subby bottom and the other one is the confident top who takes the lead in most/all matters. I don’t know why, but this seems to happen every single time. Apart from how I don’t think that’s representative of most actual m/m relationships, I personally think there’s hardly ever any reason to assign such roles to fictional characters because we hardly ever know anything about their actual sex lives. Often it’s ships who aren’t even canon! There is literally nothing to know! And even when it’s canon ships like Isak and Even, we don’t actually know anything about their sex life! And there’s no necessary correlation between someone’s behaviour outside the bedroom and in it!

So.

Basically, I’m a little bothered by this “Isak is a shy cupcake who never takes the lead and also definitely bottoms” thing that’s been growing so much recently. (Not to say there’s anything wrong with enjoying your smut however you want! If a boy wants to be fucked, he should go get himself fucked and have a great time! My point is just that that should go for all boys and that liking things up your butt isn’t a character trait, it’s a sexual preference.)

Even disregarding that Isak is a seventeen year old boy who is still in the closet when he meets Even and struggles with acting on his true desires because of how he fears it’ll make others perceive him, and has thus never been in a romantic relationship where he felt comfortable and got to explore the physical side in a way that was true to himself (if he did at all) (that is to say, it’s not unlikely he’s a virgin when he meets Even, and even if he isn’t he’s quite obviously way less experienced than Even, who also generally doesn’t seem to give a fuck about what people think about his sexuality), I think there are many instances in the show that establish Isak as a forward, not-at-all-timid person!

Annnnd I’m gonna put this behind a read more because this got seriously long oops

Keep reading

Hearts Don’t Break Around Here

Prompt: you’re trying to toilet train your 20 pound cat and you sent me this photo and now I can’t stop crying out of laughter in public.

A/N: Happy birthday to my favourite human @fetchalgernon - I love you. Thank you for making it impossible for me to write modern!jily and not include algernon. So here you go, 100% of fluff and shenanigans, with next to 0 plot. I hope you enjoy <3

Thank you @yourbcky for the stellar beta job x

Read on FFN or AO3.


It’s three in the afternoon on a Saturday when Lily drops a bag of frozen peas all over the floor of her local supermarket.

It really isn’t her fault, to be perfectly honest. Yes, she’s making a fool of herself, crying with laughter as she struggles to gather the peas that have spilled all over the floor. and the others down the aisle - from the old woman looking at the yorkshire puddings, all the way to the middle aged man studying a ratty shopping list - probably think she’s mental now, but it really isn’t her fault.

Picture this: you’re running errands, casually making your way through every different sodding aisle of the nearest Tesco Express because Sirius and co. are coming over for dinner, and the only things you have in your fridge are mustard and cheese crackers – and even though you know full well they wouldn’t mind, you actually feel like trying for a change.

Your phone buzzes with a message notification, and when you slide your finger over the screen, you’re met with a picture of Algernon, your boyfriend’s insane and alarmingly orange cat, sitting next to an empty litter box. Yes, empty, because all of the litter is strewn across the midnight blue carpet, and you can practically feel James’ despair simply by looking at his face.

If this was the case, you’d probably be cracking up like an idiot as well.

[15:02] james: toilet training algernon is not… going as expected

[15:03] lily: I dropped my peas.

[15:03] james: ???

[15:04] james: tht was a typo right

[15:05] lily: I was getting food for tonight and the picture you sent me made me drop my bag of peas.

[15:06] lily: They rolled everywhere, James. I hope you’re peased with yourself.

[15:06] james: :(

[15:06] james: btw i cant believe YOU made a pun

[15:06] lily: I know, you’re a terrible influence

[15:06] lily: Also, you’re cleaning that up.

[15:07]: james: just like u cleaned up the peas right

Keep reading

antiloquist  asked:

God could you imagine how Iggy would feel when presented with a harem? Because now I am. I'm torn between the Iggy that would be like "hell yeah of course I'm hot shit" and the Iggy that would be all flustered but flattered as hell by all the attention.

As much as I so wanna go right along with the sex god!Ignis HC, I know good and goddamn well how Ignis would actually react to all the thirsty hoes clamoring after his dick:

(Default gif for shell-shocked Ignis btw)

Ignis: …I don’t understand why all of these people want to-

Random Iggy thot: IGNISSS, I WANNA SIT ON YOUR FACCEEE

Crowd: *cheers in agreement and thirst*

Ignis: …by the Six… *fiddles with his glasses nervously, a bright blush forming on his cheeks* What… these people don’t even know me.

Me: yes, they do. They’ve watched your every move. They’ve created HCs about what they couldn’t see. They’ve drawn pictures of you in outfits you probably don’t own… well, idk, do you happen to own a set of garters and pantyhose? Asking for a friend.

Ignis: *chokes* I beg your pardon?

Me: Yeah you were begging for something else in this one fic… anyway, so, go say hi to all of your adoring fans *pushes him closer to the edge of the stage where the crowd surges forward*

Ignis: *digs in his heels* Oh no, this couldn’t possibly be- you’re presenting me to a hoarde of people who want to… they want to…

Me: …fuck you, yes. You know, Gladio took to this a lot better, and Prompto is busy taking panoramic shots with his group and helping them figure out which Snapchat filters are best

Ignis: *full sarcastic snark mode on* Oh, right, I suppose you just expect me to discuss new recipes with the masses as they unrepentantly oogle my rear end, I gather.

Me: *forcibly diverts gaze from his ass* Huh?

Ignis: *rolls his eyes* And how is Noct doing with his harem?

Me: Uhhh… he was playing a nice game of “the crowd is lava” by warping to a high point on a wall and just hanging there until his arm gets tired before switching sides, last I checked.

Ignis: … so in other words, he’s terrified. I should go to him and get us both out of such untenable circumst-

Another Iggy thot: OH DOES THIS MEAN WE GET BONUS IGNOCT???

Crowd: *SCREAMS*

Ignis: … *swallows*

Me: you can’t win. Don’t even try.

deh pets headcanon

ok so i made another headcanon before about phones and things they would all have and mentioned that evan would probably have a dog. so then naturally i just started thinking about all of them which resulted in this. another warning that it’s midnight and im half dead soooo yeah enjoy??? 


jared:

  • he would be the kid that BEGGED until his parents got him whatever animal he wanted
  • like he has a lot of pets idk
  • the first thing that comes to my mind is a bird
  • and i’m not talking like a cute little parakeet
  • im talking like an annoying ass huge bird
  • like they used to keep it in the house but it was just,,,, , so loud
  • so now they keep it in the shed
  • (don’t worry he takes great care of the bird even tho it’s in the shed)
  • i keep picturing a parrot
  • is that even llegal? idk 
  • don’t ask me
  • the bird’s  name would either be like something he named when he was little like “rainbow”
  • or it would be literally just meme
  • like
  • the bird’s name would be meme
  • there is no in between don’t fight me on this
  • he would also have a guniea pig named something really stupid too
  • idk what it would be probably dat boi or another old meme 
  • but he would love that freaking thing
  • he would like constantly hold it or like carry it around his house
  • or he would show up at evan’s house holding it and evan would be like “what why”
  • and he would be like “oh yeah. this is dat boi and he’s coming inside with me”
  • he wouldn’t have a dog tho
  • they probably had one when he was little but it passed away and they didn’t think anything could be better than that dog
  • aw now i’m sad
  • maybe he would have a hamster at one point too but it would like probably get annoying and he would give it to connor
  • oh thats another thing for later
  • long story short jared loves animals

connor:

  • connor would probably be like “i hate all animals. i hate everything. angst blah blah blah
  • but jared one day just showed up with a hamster like “just tAKE IT”
  • and then left
  • so he was like uhh okay
  • and he ended up becoming secretley obsessed with this hamster
  • like when he was feeling really angry and about to freak out he would just watch it run on it’s little wheel and it would calm him down
  • he wouldn’t name it because “he didn’t want to get too attached” 
  • (he was so attached. he loved it.)
  • he would buy so much stuff for it
  • like he would come home with bags and bags of little tubes for it to run in or a bunch of different wheels to try out 
  • his mom would be like “connor what is that” and he’d be like “nOTHING”
  • it would be a hamster mansion
  • p.s. zoe wouldn’t know about the hamster
  • she would be completley oblivious somehow
  • his parents did tho and didn’t really care
  • evan was the only person that knew about the hamster other than that
  • and he loved that thing so much
  • like whenever him and connor would hang out he would just be constantly holding it
  • evan probably named it in his head but never really says it out loud 
  • and one day he lets it slip
  • like
  • “aw can we take out hammy?”
  • and connor’s like “whatthefuck”
  • and evan gets all nervous and stuttering 
  • but they eventually just start calling it hammy
  • it would be a really tan almost orange looking hamster btw
  • and it’d probably be really fat because evan likes to give him treats
  • side note: the only other animal connor would like is evan’s dog which i will talk about later

alana:

  • alana would always love animals but she never really acted on it much
  • like she would know anything and everything about animals but would never really vocalize it 
  • until one day zoe starts talking about how she likes animals
  • then she just goes crazy
  • like she’s a Certifed Animal Lover™
  • but anyway
  • I feel like she would have a little dog
  • like not a chuiwawwawawaw i gave up on spelling that rip
  • but like a little rescue dog
  • it would probably look like a puggle 
  • and while she’s doing homework the dog would just like sit in her lap
  • (if u haven’t already noticed this is heavily based on how kristolyn lloyd mentioned alana having a dog or something with her on stage and tbh i agreed hard core)
  • this dog would be so freaking spoiled
  • like im talking huge beds made for golden retrievers 
  • purple sparkly collars and harnesses and clothes (the dog’s color would be purple. dont fight me on this) (wow i can’t believe i just gave a dog a favorite color rip)
  • she would make it wear shoes sometimes and take funny videos to post on her instagram
  • this dog would have the most extra name of all time
  • like Persephone or athena or some goddess name 
  • i didn’t include this in the other hc but she would DEF have a vlog channel
  • and she would be like “hey guys! this is alana and dionysus (yes i just googled that im sorry) and welcome to todays video!”
  • either that or she would have a guinea pig
  • but i more see her with a dog
  • she would love that dog so much

zoe:

  • golden retriever. for sure.
  • she would be the kid who BEGGED their parents for a dog for years and years
  • like every school essay would be about why she should get a dog
  • and she would like tape dog pictures to the fridge and on her notebooks at school
  • she would be s’cute
  • but when she got into high school her parents expected it to kind of drop off
  • but no
  • not at all
  • she only wrote more essays about why she should get this dog
  • and they were still like “mehhh no”
  • (actually cynthia would be fine with it but larry would be like hell no hell no hell no)
  • so the day she turned eighteen she was like “screw this im an Adult™ now”
  • and just went out and got a dog
  • and when she came back home with it everyone was like “what have you done”
  • and she just shrugs and is like “i’m an adult now i get to do what i want”
  • and nobody really says anything after that
  • she loves that dog so much
  • it would be a girl named kiwi
  • or something weird but adorable like that
  • and she would sneak it into school sometimes 
  • she would totally get caught but it would be worth it to her
  • she only did that when the dog was a puppy tho
  • when kiwi got big she loved her even more
  • omg this dog would know so many tricks
  • like im not talking “sit” and “roll over”
  • (but obvi she would know those)
  • im talking like dance and jump and speak and play dead
  • that dog would be so smart
  • zoe would work really hard to train her tho
  • she would try to bring her everywhere
  • like when all of them would hang out she would make the plans around wherever place was dog friendly ya know
  • her parents would be like “no dog on the bed!1!1!”
  • but no
  • i mean the dog would obviously have a dog bed 
  • (and it would be damn comfy tbh)
  •  but she would always sleep in zoe’s bed
  • not at her feet but like right up on top of the pillow like she’s a human
  • ok I’ve gotta stop now time for evan handsoap

evan:

  • i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again: i love evan so much okay
  • just a reminder
  • anywho
  • evan would never really be the type to beg for a dog
  • but heidi got one for him at the beginning of senior year just bc she thought it would be good for him
  • (she tries so hard i love her too)
  • and at first he was like “oh ok hi dog”
  • but then he’s like “ohmygod i love u”
  • it’s def a dachshund/wiener dog don’t fight me on this i know it’s a thing
  • he would name it bonsai 
  • i know he would
  • my hear is melting just thinking about this s end he lp
  • but he would love that thing so much
  • he would love taking hikes or little nature walks with her
  • (the dog would be a girl btw idk how i know this i just do)
  • and the dog would be very fit
  • like she would never be fat
  • she wouldn’t know very many tricks
  • like  only sit and high five
  • but it’s ok she’s an angel
  • she’s probably  like very light tan almost blonde (if u google a pic of a light tan weiner dog you’ll see what I mean they’re so cute I cant)
  • and when he’s anxious she can always tell
  • so she goes up to him and just like sits next to him and kinda whines bc she’s worried?? idk you know what i mean
  • but at night she sleeps curled up into evan’s side
  • like wiener dogs when they sleep literally curl into a little burrito 
  • she does that
  • it’s so cute
  • when connor stays over the dog sleeps between them
  • oh yeah
  • that’s the only dog connor likes
  • like he hard core loves that dog
  • when he sees her he uses this high pitched baby voice
  • you know the one im talking about
  • it’s adorable
  • evan thinks it’s the best thing he’s ever heard actually
  • he loves that connor loves his dog
  • i just thought of this but what if it was a therapy dog
  • like he could bring it to school when he had really bad days
  • and she would be v friendly and love people
  • and in class when he got anxious he would just stick his hand down and pet his dog
  • (if u can’t already tell idk how service/therapy dogs work someone educate me)
  • he wouldn’t bring her with him a lot
  • bc people would want to pet her and he would get all flustered
  • and once he got kicked out of a store because the worker thought he just brought in a dog and evan was too nervous to explain that it was his therapy dog
  • poor boyo
  • but zoe and alana and connor and jared would BEG him to because they all love her
  • so when they got ice cream at a la mode he would always bring bonsai just to make them shut up
  • and the employees there know bonsai and always give them a free vinalla cone for her
  • ah i just love the idea of him having a dog
BTS Reaction | Finding your drawings of them

Kim Seokjin

The day had reached late afternoon, you were out getting groceries to make dinner, and Jin had just arrived home at your shared apartment. It was a fairly spacious apartment, very well kept and tidy, decorated with all the little gifts you both had bought for each other over the years. Opening the door, the first thing Seokjin noticed was how all the lights were off, but with you, he knew that this didn’t always mean you weren’t home, sometimes you just liked to watch movies in your shared bedroom with all the lights off, you say it ‘adds the effect’ to the movie.

“Y/N,” Jin called, “I’m home!” He walked in and took off his shoes, turning on the lights in the process. But when he heard no response, he began to worry and began his search for you. The tall boy texted you, asking where you were as he walked into your shared bedroom, turning the light on there as well. As he waited for a response, he noticed the nightstand drawer wasn’t shut, thought nothing of it, and went to close it. Until he saw it. ‘It’ was your sketchbook, and of course Jin was curious as to what you were drawing, so he decided to open it to the page that was marked by your pencil. 

Jin gasped in surprise. You had secretly drawn a wonderful picture of him smiling. Why you didn’t tell him about it was a mystery, but this boy was so amazed by your work as well as very proud. His phone chirped with a new message and brought him out of his thoughts, he checked it and found your text back to him about how you just finished buying groceries for dinner. He was still amazed, and he wanted you to know how much he loved your work, so he replied letting you know he was home and that he loved your artwork of him.

“Okay, I got home a little early so I just wanted to check in and see where you were. Btw, I love your drawing of me, jagi! You’re so talented!”

Originally posted by myloveseokjin

Min Yoongi

Today, your boyfriend had invited you to the studio since you seemed to miss him a lot. While he worked on writing lyrics, you made some sketches in your sketchbook that you had brought along, for you knew your boyfriend well enough to know that you were easily a distraction for him, so you just tried your best to not distract him when he was working.

After a while of silence, drowsiness began to take over your senses - Yoongi had been making music with earbuds in, he left one out in case you needed him for something though. Once you had been overcome by sleep, your boyfriend didn’t notice, not at first anyways. It was only when he heard the sound of your dropping pencil that he looked next to him to check and make sure you were fine, but he wasn’t expecting to see the sight that awaited him.

You still sat in a slightly slumped yet upright position in the other office chair, eyes shut and lips slightly parted. The sight was beautiful, but of course, Yoongi would never admit to it, at least not in front of others. Then he noticed your sketchbook, which still lay on the empty space on the side of his large desk. Since he couldn’t make out what you had drawn at first glance, he leaned over a little more to get a closer look, only to find a perfectly drawn image of him just a few minutes earlier, making music. He leaned a little too far over because it woke you up after a while of him continuing to lean over and stare with amazement at your art.

“Yoongi…” You spoke quietly, a yawn escaping your lips soon after.

“Y/N, I never realized how talented you are at drawing, maybe you could help design the cover for my next solo album.”

Originally posted by jimiyoong

Keep reading

The Way You Move//Kim Yugyeom (Part 14)

Pairing: Yugeyom x Reader

Genre: Romance, Smut

Summary: @morsalinou said:
Your rrequest are open omgggg ok,…. I will try requesting simething for the first time here😅 hmm can i request a smut (🙊💕) where yugyeom sees you dancing in a competition (like hit the stage) or you dance with him you can decide (this weeks theme is love did you watch this show btw😍) and the rest is up to you! I’m so nervous omg😲😂

Author’s Note:  Sorry for the lack of updates! Also, sorry for the length of this chapter, it’s short, but only because it’s a filler chapter! Enjoy it nonetheless!

xoxo Sara

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7 - Part 8 - Part 9  -

Part 10 - Part 11 - Part 12 - Part 13 - Part 14 - Part 15 - Final


You saw the color drain from Yugyeom’s face before you turned around, beginning to walk back towards the door that led to the stage. Your heart broke into pieces inside of your chest, each piece stabbing you from the inside out.

“(Y/N),” You heard Yugyeom call your name softly, but before he could say another word, you were out the stage door, slamming it behind you.

You knew that your instructor was right; that all the girls fawned over Yugyeom and wanted to date him, but you never thought anyone would attempt to kiss him. Maybe it wasn’t expecting anyone to kiss him— maybe you didn’t expect him to let them kiss him.

Keep reading

Got7 comforts GF when her best friend betrays her

Request: Hey can I request a Got7 reaction to their gf being upset because their bff betrayed her and they comfort her? :33 Love your blog btw <3

A/N: I really enjoyed writing this, so I hope you like it and I hope our followers continue to make requests! - Lady B <3

Disclaimer: Gifs not mine. Got7 members not mine. JYP not mine. All credit goes to owners.


JB

When you come home crying, he would be by your side immediately asking what happened. When you tell him, be prepared for him to get every bit as angry at your friend as you are. He would have to work on calming both himself and you down, so he would do something such as putting on your favorite movie to watch together, holding you and peppering you with frequent kisses the whole time.


Jinyoung

When you tell Jinyoung what happened, you would have the man’s full attention. He would want to sit down with you and hear every single thing that happened and everything that you were thinking and feeling. He would think carefully about what to tell you, and he would always have just the right words to say. After you calm down a bit, he would offer to do anything you wanted to do together. *wink wink*


Jackson

Jackson would feel secondhand betrayed by your friend. He would be angry and hurt, just for your sake. Of course, being the sweetheart that he is, he would be hyper-focused on making you feel better. He would act as cute and silly and ridiculous as possible until he could get a laugh or smile out of you. If that didn’t work, he would show you his abs, which had a 100% guaranteed success rate.


Bambam

Bambam never trusted your friend! Or he would be sure to tell you that and anything else to make his beautiful girlfriend feel better. He would turn on some serious Bambam-level charm and aegyo to get a good reaction out of you. When you felt up to it, he would offer up an exciting night for you two, spent either out on the town or indoors, your choice. But we all know which one he hopes you pick.


Mark

Mark would be shocked when you told him what happened. He would want to hear about what happened, but wouldn’t have much of an idea what to say. Instead, he would sit quietly by your side, hugging you, rubbing your back, kissing your forehead, holding your hand, and telling you how amazing and sexy and pretty you are. He would comfort you more with actions than words, but he would make sure to not leave your side until you felt better.


Youngjae

Bring forth the sunshine! If his smile doesn’t cheer you up, nothing will tbh. All that aside, he would be with you in a heartbeat, ready to take your side and comfort you in any way he can because he hates to see you sad. Expect lots of snuggles and kisses in his bed, pictures of Coco, and sweet compliments about how wonderful you are (since you’re not Bambam). He would tell you that you don’t need a friend like that and that he loves you more than anything.


Yugyeom

Yugyeom would also try to use his aegyo to cheer you up. He would want to listen to what you say and how you’re feeling, and he would be mad at your friend, but he would still turn on the cute for you pretty fast. He might do a little dance for you, or ask you to dance with him. He would try to do anything to get what your friend did to you off your mind. Eventually, his charms would have you smiling and laughing until you were sleepy. He would whisper to you as you fell asleep that you were his best friend.