I left school right at the last bell, going to meet up with
my friend Matt. We weren’t that close, not as close as me and Luke but it was
good to have other friends as well. I felt kind of bad though, because Luke had
asked me if we could hang out today and I turned him down.
I went to meet up with Matt, and he suggested that we go get
some coffee so we started walking towards the nearest coffee shop. He hung out
for the entire afternoon, but I still had some homework to do so I said goodbye
and made my way home. I still felt bad for blowing off Luke, so I had bought
him a cookie at the shop, planning on passing by his house to bring it to him.
I let myself in, as I’ve done a hundred times and headed
straight to him room, he was clearly home alone by the lack of people. I saw
him sitting at his desk with his earphones in and paper sprawled out around,
and knocked lightly and walked in.
He turned his head to me and took out his earphones, giving me
a small smile. “Hey,” I grinned, walking over to his desk. He didn’t say
anything, putting down his pen. “How do you know Matt.” Were the first words to
leave him lips.
“What?” I exclaimed, confused about his question that came
out of nowhere. “I saw you,” He stood up, explaining himself. “After school. I
was walking home, and I saw you with him.”
“Oh,” I muttered, not really knowing where he was going with
“So, I was just asking how you knew him.” He asked again. “Are
you guys going out? Like are you guys a couple or whatever?” he asked, before I
had a chance to say anything.
“No!” I exclaimed again. “We’re friends, we hung out.”
Luke bit lip and nodded. “Okay, don’t date him.”
“What the hell, man?” I have no idea what’s gotten into
Luke, I don’t know why he was being like this.
“The guys a tool,” he muttered. “You don’t even know him,
Luke.” I said. He was starting to piss me off, I don’t know what his problem was.
“I don’t need to” He shrugged, and repeated once more. “Don’t
“What the hell is your problem Luke? You can’t tell me what
to do!” I was starting to yell, sounding angrier by the second.
He didn’t say anything so I kept going. “You’re not my dad,
or my brother, or my boyfriend. I can see whoever I want to see!”
“No,” He spoke up, yelling as well. “I don’t want you to see
“Why the hell not?” I shot back at him.
“Because, because I don’t want you to get hurt.” He said
Even what he said would be considered nice, it pissed me
off. “Who says I’m going to date the guy? And so what if I do? Maybe I want to
fucking date him! What’s it to you?”
“Because I fucking love you, okay Y/N?” He yelled at me,
making me jerk back in shock. What?
“Not in that best friend bullshit way.” He said, still
yelling. “I. Love. You.” He repeated, enunciating each word. “I know it sounds
selfish, but the thought of you with another guy,” He paused, quieting down a
bit. “Its life a knife stabbing into my heart.”
My jaw was probably down to the floor. I was not expecting
that at all. “So yeah,” He kept speaking, voice getting louder again. “I don’t
want you with that Matt guy, I want you with me. I fucking want you.”
He had gotten closer to me, chest rising and falling at a
faster pace than usual because of all the yelling, and I could feel his breath
hitting my face. “Fuck, I’m sorry.” He muttered.
I didn’t think. I had no idea what I was doing; I mean
this was best friend. The guy who had helped me finish my colouring books and
who would push me on the swings. I reached forward, lacing my hands around his
neck to pull him forward, shut my eyes and brought my mouth to his.
He seemed taken aback by my actions, and honestly so was I
but I didn’t want to think right now.
To everyone who has sent me love and support the past few days, I can’t put into words how much I appreciate it. You guys are always so very kind to me and I’m honestly so grateful to all of you. I am feeling a lot better now, though not quite at 100%. I should be able to start writing more soon. For now, here’s a quick thing I speed-wrote for Cherry jomjjeoreo back before I left Korea. I managed to finish it today, so it’s a present for both her and you guys. Lots of love~
such bullshit, I swear,” you grumble to yourself as you stare down at the
smoking engine of your car. You had gotten it serviced not two months prior in
order to make sure that this exact situation didn’t happen on the road trip
you’d be planning for months. And now the engine had bit it in the middle of
fuck-all nowhere, Nevada, and of course
signal reception was shit. There was a town you had passed a few miles back
that, considering its proximity to the highway, probably had a mechanic and you
were quickly coming to terms with the fact that you were probably going to have
to walk it.
After a few
minutes of wandering uselessly around the road, phone high in the air, you
only to grab your keys and a water bottle, letting the hood fall down as you
offer a quick prayer to whatever god is watching that your car doesn’t get
jacked in your absence and start the long trek back towards town. It doesn’t
take long before your water’s running low and sweat’s starting to gather
uncomfortably on your back. You don’t spot another soul on the way, not even a
car passing by, and you start to think that it might be best to just leave the
car there and spend a night at whatever crappy motel you can find.
By the time
you spot the town on the horizon, you’re gross, cranky, and dehydrated. You ask
the first person you come across if there’s a mechanic and they tell you it’s
not far, pointing you in the right direction before going on their way.
Compared to the journey to the town, finding the shop takes less than a blink.
exactly the most aesthetically pleasing place, but mechanics rarely care about
their storefronts, and the sign that declares it Kim’s Auto Shop is in decent enough repair that you think this
might actually work out okay. You push the door open hesitantly, wincing at the
intensity of the bells that sound your arrival, and try not to cry in relief as
air conditioning swims over you. There’s no one behind the desk in the office
and you can hear what sounds like drilling from the back but you don’t get to
take more than a step towards the garage before a tall man fills the doorframe.
Welcome to Kim’s Auto Shop,” he smiles widely, dimple much more charming than
it should be. “How can I – are you okay?”
all my life whenever i was feeling sick or down i was always, and even to this day, told “it’s all in your head” which is so telling for who ive become today. ive realized that yes, it is all in my head. but that doesnt invalidate the circumstance or my feelings associated with it.
I mean, don’t get me wrong.. It feels like I’m wearing a second skin- and I love that. So natural feeling. But where the fuck do I put my cell phone while lifting?!? I had to squat!!! Lame. These need pockets!!
My second problem is that I have a big butt…. Bigger than my hips…. So my booty makes the leggings scrunch down a little- i keep having to pull them up. Bahhhhhh
Also- people acted like they have never seen a guy in leggings before!! Let me workout without your stares people. Oh well, my Quads look goooooood.
Lilac just looks at Kaito and shacks her head, "Nah I don't feel like dealing with you today." She says and runs quickly away from him and runs to her room. Luckily the door was open so she could make her escape.
Kaito stared, “………What was that about? I was just walking down the hall.”
Allie, what can you say about the black churches burned down in just a couple of days?
It’s awful. I feel bad for my black elders. Like, they lived through this shit already. They already saw they churches burnt down, their people killed and no one giving a shit, they protested so WE wouldn’t face it today and yet it’s happening.
So I just wanted to post a proud little blurb about myself today bc it’s unusual for me to feel proud of myself so I wanted to share it. So usually I think of myself as a really shitty driver and I get really anxious when I have to drive on the highway especially. And I usually never drive without taking my ADD medication. But today I did not feel like taking it and having to deal with the come down. I had to drive like 2 ½ hours on the highway and I didn’t think I could do it without my medication but I didn’t take it today and I survived and I’m really proud of myself for resisting the urge to turn to drugs and giving my natural brain a chance to do it’s thang and yeah lol I know this doesn’t sound like a big deal but I was pretty heavily addicted to my medication for a little while this past school semester and started relying on it way too much to function and it was making me thin, tired, cranky and just not who I really am. So yeah today was a real win in my mind :~)
earlier today i finished reading an assembly such as this, by unforth. you guys, this is a fantastic fic. i read it over the course of a day and could not put it down. it’s a regency era fic, which is decidedly not my favourite genre at all, but it sucked me in from the very beginning. i was surprised how much i loved it. the imagery and dialogue were both fantastic, and i really felt immersed in this world. the romance between dean and castiel is so sweet and at times heartbreaking. you really feel for them and hate the society keeping them apart. charlie is a total boss, too. and might i say, the smut is fantastic. it fits the voice of the whole fic without sounding stuffy or prude. it’s seriously hot. even if you’ve never enjoyed regency-era stuff before, read this story. easily one of my favourites.
I’m tired of feeling like shit about my skin, so I’ve decided to venture away from Lush and search for a few products that will really meet my needs.
Today is my first day using the Murad Time Release Acne Cleanser. I’ve been using the spot treatment on and off since my wedding. I know the spot treatment works because I bought it just because I had broken out with a huge zit on my chin 48 hours before I was due to walk down the aisle. You’ve all seen my wedding photos… There’s no zit there!
I will post more skin progress photos as I keep using the Murad products. This is honestly my last resort before going to get a prescription! I’m so tired of having acne. I’m ready to boost my confidence.
How did you lose so much weight? Techniques, tips?
Hi I done keto which is low carb moderate protein high fat. I lost 56lb with diet alone and 11lb at the gym the last month.
For me I got to a point where I was so down I couldn’t of got lower and I made a decision I didn’t want to feel that way anymore. I kept how I was feeling in my head and used it as power to fight my way to where I am today about 80% of the way there physically and maybe 60% mentally x
My driving lesson went well today I stalled a few times I won`t blame it on the hot temperature but it definitely had something to do. It`s very hot today I can feel the sweat drip down my boobs, I think I`ll be ready for the test by the end of august. Let`s talk about the test results I now feel silly for worrying so much, I knew it was Franz baby but my question now : Is it wise to get back with him?! it`s been 5 years since we broke up I dated Sven and he married another woman, we met and fell in love when were teens but we`re not the same any more . Our break up was very tough on me I loved him so much and it was hard to learn how to live without him. Point A is Franz, B recovering from depression, C Sven and D happy and healthy life; now I feel like I`m going from point D back to A. We did talk about our future and I know I can still have a happier and healthier life but it still feels like a step back!
I feel so much better today… case it hasn’t been obvious, the past two weeks or so, I had this intense lasting bout of depression and other shit, I’m not quite sure what it was. I mean, it happens a lot obviously, I have bpd, it just was so intense and sudden. I’m still really struggling, but it started to ease yesterday or so.
I felt like a cloud was lifted off of me; it’s so strange to feel things the way I do. Though, I need to be careful. I still am off, and it’s full moon. And stuff..
Today and yesterday, despite a rough start, turned out to be great.
The gym went amazing yesterday. I haven’t been going as much due to how down I’ve been and my shoulder injury. I worked around it, tried alternatives, and it all went great.
I also, despite all of this shit, have been doing great in my classes- I got 100% in my test yesterday, only two wrong on the one before that. I also really love that class. I start my day with one of my really good friends, and she’s so great to me.. we’ve hung out a lot after, get lunch, and then go to library to study.
and I’ve got over 100% in my other mental health course. So, that’s really been helping me have something positive to look at.
Today, I got almost my entire personality disorder presentation done for my mental health course. I was worried, and it contributed to how down I felt cause I couldn’t get it started with how down I’ve been and was worried, but it’s great!!
I’ve got everything else done for the week in that class early yesterday. All I have left is a test, which I have to study for, but it’s not like me studying mental disorders is a bother or anything ;p
Ah, and we got pizza, so, I mean, enough said. I also, in the past, have had a tendency to bake whenever I get down, to help distract me, etc, so I am making my cookies that they are all obsessed with.
I try to not get out of character, but this is fucking pathetic. the KKK just burned down this church in Greeleyville, South Carolina. to y'all its just another story, but this is fucking HOME to me. I grew up around this church and these people, and they’re the reason why I am who I am today. they made me feel accepted being biracial in an all black community. the media is so quick to call us ‘thugs’ and they 'fear’ us, but bitch we don’t do shit like this. AND TO A CHURCH? they’re planning to burn down more black churches also. I’m so disgusted, I don’t even know what to say. South Carolina has always been 'peaceful’ when it comes to shit like this, but fuck it now I’m fed up. I’m so tired of white people. this isn’t gonna do anything but motivate us, watch. 💪
Yeah, I may be feeling down and totally panicking about where I’m gonna live in the Fall, but I’ve got tWO NEW BRAS TO CHOOSE FROM TODAY THAT’RE COMFIER THAN WEARING A PILLOW, so I’m doing ok, actually