i was born on a monday ;)

somewhere, in a better gotham, the joker was born a woman, with eyes like candy apples, smooth skin. babysoft. 

in the gotham we know, the joker fell into a pit of toxic waste and turned green with envy. in this gotham, the better one, the joker is a tall, thin lady walking down the street. “smile, pretty” follows in her footsteps. when she stands at open mic laughter nights, she’s heckled from the crowd. they won’t smile for her but they resent her frown. 

her mother says that her best feature is her body. the joker spends hours staring in mirrors. picturing a trophy-wife kind of life. smile, pretty. smile pretty. smile. pretty. she’s sixteen the first time she tapes her lips up, just to see if she can teach her skin to learn the shape better. your teeth are your best feature. in the wild, smiling is a sign of fear.

she’s twenty and lives alone with her dog and tries to be okay with that. another night where she’s losing money on transportation, but she goes to the open mic anyway. the guy before her talks about airline food. she gets on the stage and immediately booed. and it’s years like this, in a pattern, in the weave of her passion, so that every night is thrown beer bottles and shouting and comments that make her sick to her stomach and being told she’s nothing special and being told women aren’t funny and being told her voice is shrill and ugly and being told when she’s too animated that she’s crazy and being told when she’s too stiff that she’s boring and being asked out by every single sleeze in the zip code and being shouted at when she says no and the neverending tumble of it because maybe tomorrow will be better, maybe tomorrow will be better, maybe tomorrow

he comes up on stage with her and soaks her shirt in beer. now that’s a show! the man calls. he gets cheers. she doesn’t cry, just walks out the back door before doing something stupid. the manager pats her on the head while she leaves. it’s okay, darling. he looks her over. i don’t get it. a body like yours? you should be an exotic dancer. comedy isn’t for everybody. you’re not funny, sweetie.

she’s not funny. not funny. not funny. the words turn alarm bells. the one thing she’s supposed to be talented at. the one thing she loves is just to make people laugh. and she’s not even funny.

hey you know what’s kind of funny? the way it feels at the bottom. how flat everything turns. how unreal. she skims like a rock. your body is your best feature. she tries again on monday. “you know what’s funny? i thought about murder the other day”. don’t we all, sweetie. on the bus, come home with me. on the street, why aren’t you smiling.

maybe some people are born close to the camel’s back, maybe some people have just always been looking for the straw. it’s too much in either direction. she goes home and smears makeup on her skin. tears her hair off. dyes it green, a shock, to match her eyes and spite and envy at men who can tell the same jokes and get laughter for it where she gets nothing and nothing and nothing, where she is pushed off of stages, where she is mocked.

well, isn’t it her turn to do the mocking.

in this story, in this better gotham where vigilante is sometimes good, sometimes a few letters from villain: who will stop her? in this life, when harley walks in, the two are different, best friends, sugar-on-pie because isn’t it true the world has it out for women. in this life, when harley shows up with hyenas, the joker thinks about the wild and the laws of it and says, “oh, of course, let them in”. in this life the violence has a name. 

and nobody says it without laughing.

{Special} College!AU Johnny
  • major: film & television 
  • minor: business 
  • clubs: rather than clubs, johnny always has some part in other classmates movies/set productions so,,,he has no time for clubs LOL
  • sports: was humbly signed up for track and field by ten but the only good thing about his long legs is jumping over hurdles,,,otherwise he’s slower than a turtle much to everyone’s surprise 
  • goes through what his friends call “phases” every other week,,,,,and it usually has to do with whatever project he’s most immersed in
  • and that means one week,,,,when he was helping out the french exchange students he walked around campus in a beret and refused to eat bagels - only croissants. then he was working on an action scene and signed up for martial arts on the the quad,,,,,,or that one time they were trying to do a historical bit and johnny almost bought a hanbok on amazon for fifty bucks and taeyong had to physically remove the laptop from his dorm in order to stop him
  • no one is surprised that he’s a film major,,,,,tbh he’s always been creative and outspoken so the industry fits him
  • the shocking part is his minor,,,,because is business really something???? johnny has any interest in
  • and johnny always dramatically puts his hand over his forehead and is like “in THIS day and age all that matters is MONEY no one cares for the ART-”
  • everyone is like ok we get it but johnny just siGHS like the whole world is over and slumps in his chair and is like i know ill never make it,,,,,,,ill have to be a slave to the system a COG in the machine another worker bee - but wait did i tell you guys about this GREAT idea i had last night for a movie so basically the main character is a zombie alien and-
  • talks a mile a minute,,,,,seriously even when his opinion or comment is unneeded,,,, but he’s trying his best and he’s always trying to lift the mood and make people more confident
  • like he IS the person in the friend group whose there for anyone when they need him,,,,, is the person who makes ten smile when he’s down, helps cheer up doyoung about the future,,,,, and even gets taeil out of the dumps (which is a rarity, but,,,,,,,wow is it harD to cheer him up - tbh only johnny is capable)
  • tells people to have a super-duper fantastic great day after seeing them in the coffee shop,,,,,and the person will be like do i//?? even know him??? probably not but johnny is trying to spread that positivity
  • and it works !!! because when he’s smiling and laughing he looks so soft and approachable 
  • but at the same time,,,,when he’s really working on a scene or on a plan for filming,,,, he adopts an entirely different aura 
  • ten calls it the ‘youngho effect’ meaning that silly johnny is gone and now it’s down-to-business youngho and during finals week,,,,,,is when it’s the WORST
  • like people don’t even recognize him and thats hard considering his fashion and height stand out ,,,, but seriously the stern, concentrated look on his face makes his whole appearance seem different
  • yuta is always like “youngho is sexy and johnny is cute” and johnny is just like ?????? are you- flirting with me??? or are you just commenting and yuta is like ;) it’s hard to tell i know but no im just saying my dude
  • johnny is also super charitable ,,,, like find him helping every last single person in his studio effects class or dramatic writing
  • which is why he barely gets sleep because he’ll be up with a group of writers or on film location for work that isn’t EVEN HIS but,,,, he really likes film and he really likes seeing and testing out new things so his ability to say no is down the drain
  • unless it’s doyoung asking for extra change to get coffee then johnny is like lol no jokes jokes
  • oh also him and ten are practically inseparable and they sometimes do what taeyong refers to as “comedy acting” on the quad which is really just them arguing over something dumb like is trump REALLY an overgrown cheeto but also everyone on campus loves it
  • minus their ACTUAL friends who are like can you two please be quiet for like a minute and ten and johnny are both like excuse me no and taeil is like rip my ears
  • but they’re best buddies,,,,,,,it’s very adorable 
  • ten’s dad even calls johnny to ask if ten is doing well in uni and johnny always try to make something up before ten steals the phone and has to explain in rushed thai that NO he didn’t get a tattoo on his forehead
  • accidentally got confused for being a part of the uni mens volleyball team because of his height
  • misses chicago and has pictures up of it and his family in his dorm and everyone is like wow johnny you’re such a sentimental guy but like LMAO HE REALLY IS HE CRIED DURING THE LION KING anyway
  • you’re not a film student at all,,,,,you’re actually pretty camera shy and so you think watching movies is cool and all but you’d like,,,,,,never dream of being an actor or something like that
  • which is ok because your major has nothing to do with that line of work and your part-time job is as a dog walker in the city on weekends
  • and one weekend you’re doing your job,,,,,the last dog you’re walking for the day is a cute corgi named mr. squiggles 
  • when suddenly someone taps you on the shoulder and to your shock you turn around and see ???? johnny
  • who you know just because a friend of yours is in a class with him and he’s kinda hard to miss ,,,,,,, he’s basically a walking skyscraper 
  • but you’re like “oh h-hi?” assuming he might have recognized you from uni but johnny isn’t looking at you
  • he’s looking at mr. squiggles and then at you and going 
  • “you two would be perfect for my project! have you ever wanted to do acting???”
  • for a second you think you might just be making this up in your mind but you blink a couple of times and johnny is STILL standing in front of you
  • looking more excited than mr. squiggles whose small stubby legs are pawing at johnny’s jeans and asking for him to bend down and pet him
  • and you’re like “uh,,,,,,n-no?”
  • johnny does bend down,,,,giving the corgi a couple of pats on the head only to look up at you again and go “but i think this dog has!!!! do you think you could be in my film?”
  • johnny’s eyes turn up as he smiles,,,looking at you almost expectingly,,,,,
  • until you scoop up mr. squiggles in your hands and shake your head explaining that for one,,,,,the dog isn’t yours,,,,,,this is your job and two,,,,,being filmed is a bit-
  • johnny’s smile drops into a childish pout and he reaches out to scratch the pups ear going “but you guys are perfect for the scene,,,,,and it’ll be short!!!! can you ask his owner??”
  • and you wanna be like excuse me i gotta go im getting a call but then u know,,, johnny goes to uni with you so maybe not making a fool of yourself is the right call so you just shrug and mumble that you’ll ask 
  • johnny’s grin returns and he quickly takes something out of his back pocket,,,,,which you realize is a scrap of notebook paper with a number scrawled on it
  • and he’s like i make this in case i find people on the street i want to cast,,,,,text me if the owner says yes!!! ill keep the spot open for you and -
  • he motions to mr.squiggles in your hands and you go “oh his name is mr. squiggles” and johnny bursts into cheerful laughter like “that’s PERFECT!! ill be waiting for your message”
  • and with that he’s off,,,,,you left holding the dog and the paper with his number and thinking to yourself that,,,,maybe johnny will just,,,,,,,,,,forget?
  • i mean he probably doesnt even know you go to the same uni,,,,,you reason as you put mr.squiggles down and go back to your walk
  • ,,,,,,out of curiosity though when you return him to his owners you ask ,,,,, would they let him be in a movie some time and the owner claps their hands together and is like ofc!!!! mr.squiggles is a born STAR!!!!! why is a friend of yours looking -
  • and you’re like nope no im just asking see you next saturday
  • come monday you’ve basically forgot about the whole thing,,,convinced johnny is popular enough to find other people to act for him
  • when you’re waiting in line to get coffee at the cafe and someone goes “hey!!!! what did mr.squiggle’s parents say?”
  • and it’s,,,,loud so everyone turns to look at you because mr.squiggles-?
  • and you’re like,,,what who??? only to see johnny standing behind you in line and you’re like oh myGOD
  • and he’s like “i knew id seen you before!!! cool that we go to the same school, so can you guys do it-?”
  • and you’re like “o,,,oh they said n-no so im sorry but-”
  • johnny clicks his tongue but waves his hand and is like nO SWEAT we can find another dog you walk dogs right????? do you think anyone else would be cool with it??
  • and you’re like dogs? what are dogs? idk any dogs? ahahahah
  • but johnny is like you told me you walk dogs,,,,,right??? im sure someone is ok with having their pup on screen plus it’s for a class so really-
  • your turn to order comes up and you quickly spout it out just to be like “oh, im sorry i have to go-” to johnny
  • rushing over to the pick up counter and thankfully,,,,a small black coffee is fast to make,,,,so you grab it and johnny makes a point to try and call out to you but you’re like class!!!! gtg!!!!
  • and with that you’re gone,,,,,looking solemnly down at the coffee in your hand and crinkling your nose because the last time you drank coffee was the last time you had a math final in high school
  • but also,,,,,why did johnny have to remember??? why did you have to bump into him???? what kind of weird coincidence???
  • but also you’re sure you’re off the hook this time,,,,like you told him mr.squiggles was unavailable and it wasnt like your classes ever clashed with film majors so you were home free
  • but,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
  • you weren’t
  • a couple of days later johnny saw you in the library,,, asking again if you were up for the part
  • unenthusiastically you explained that all the dog owners said no so,,,,,,and johnny said it was fine again that he knew some people with dogs so-
  • but you ducked out of there again saying you had a study group to meet up with
  • another time you were on the quad and johnny sat down next to you,,,,asking how you were and if you weren’t busy to talk
  • once again you checked your phone and pretended to take a call
  • and honestly,,,,,,you don’t know WHY you can’t just tell him you can’t act- or more like you don’t want to act
  • because you’re convinced he can find someone else so easily that the pursuant asking you ,,,,, you just didn’t get it
  • not until you overhear a couple of people talking about how they’ve never seen johnny hold out for this long,,,,,usually he’s the first one to start filming ,,,,, but something is taking him so long this time
  • and with a slightly guilty conscious you take out your phone,,,the paper with johnny’s number is still tucked in your wallet and you fish it out too,,,inputting it and typing out a text
  • ‘im sorry ive avoided you about this, but im not a,,,,,,,im not an actor. i dont want to mess up your movie so i hope someone else can be the better fit’.
  • you send it,,,,,hoping you weren’t being to blunt but an hour later your phone lights up and johnny’s reply is ‘that’s ok! im sorry for bothering you, it was really uncool of me to keep chasing you - i didn’t know you were uncomfortable and i was being a douche. tell mr.sqiggles i still think he’s a star in the making!’
  • smiling down at the cute response and the line of dog emojis and stars you go back to your homework,,,,,but it’s a little hard because,,,,,,why’s johnny so much cuter to you all of a sudden
  • a couple of weeks go by and you stumble across what looks like a film set near the dog park you frequent on your job
  • and your entire pack starts tugging on their leashes in excitement and barking because of all the new people and cool looking cameras and you’re like “guys!!! calm down” 
  • and you notice someone turn around and it’s johnny??? he waves at you and you’re like “he-hey?? are you filming here??” and johnny nods and is like “it’s a little film im doing about a dog and their owner and they can like,,,,,,,talk to each other and the dog gossips about other dogs it’s kind of a comedy??? romance i guess”
  • and you’re like oo a romance featuring cute dogs cant go wrong with that and johnny is like exactly,,,,101 dalmatians,,,,,airbud - not romantic but dogs so
  • you giggle and you’re like well!! ill try to keep the kids from barking too much but!!
  • johnny grins and squats down,,, mr.squiggles running toward him like johnny’s been his owner for yEARS and licking his face and johnny is like it’s still a shame i couldn’t cast this lil guy
  • you smile,,,and johnny says he’s going to be filming for a bit but that it was nice talking
  • and you know,,, you go to the dog park and play a bit not noticing johnny whose struggling with the actors on set and some of the crew and usually johnny is really good with people 
  • but the way the lead isn’t getting along with the dog is stressing him out and at some point johnny is like “it’s fine, ill scrape this idea” and someone mentions that the deadline to hand it in is three days away and johnny is like “it doesn’t matter, i don’t think it’s going to work out and im not giving unfinished garbage to the professor.”
  • you look up seeing that most of the people are gone except for johnny and you pick up mr.squiggles and go over to him and you’re like “you look down,,,,,so i brought this guy to maybe help you smile?” 
  • johnny looks up from his head in his hands and gives a sad chuckle that you’ve never seen from him and you’re like whats wrong
  • and he’s like “i think,,,,im not going to be able to finish this.” and you’re like why not??? you had people here and stuff and he’s like sometimes things don’t work out
  • and you’re like do you have time?? and johnny mumbles that three days isn’t enough, even if the whole thing is fifteen minutes long
  • you see the defeat in his eyes,,,,which is hard to imagine since this is the johnny that never seems to give up
  • so with a tiny swallow you go “i,,,,,,,,,ill help. mr. squiggles too.”
  • johnny raise an eyebrow and shakes his head,,,,,saying that he can’t force you to help him, that’d be fucked up of him and you’re like you’re not!!!! consider it a change of heart
  • johnny motions to mr.squiggles and goes “didn’t their owners refuse-?” and you’re like “hahahah abOUT THAT,,,,,anyway what do we have to do??”
  • johnny explains the jist of the plot,,,,,you and mr.squiggles can understand each other and talk about the other dogs but you meet another owner who can speak to his dog too and you,,,,,basically fall in love
  • and you’re like giggling because ok,,,, a bit corny but u like it
  • and you’re like whose going to play the love interest?? and johnny looks around and is like i,,,, think im gonna have to do it because all the other footage is unusable. the dog tried to pee on the leads so -
  • and you’re like oh my gosh,,, well ok,,,,,,let’s try
  • to your surprise you’re not AS nervous in front of the camera as you thought
  • maybe because holding mr. squiggles calms you down or maybe it’s the way johnny is patient and encouraging 
  • but when all your individual cuts are done johnny is like “ok we have on thing left, where we meet and,,,,,well,,,,,,,mr. squiggles is supposed to tell you to ask me out” and you’re like oh,,, Oh,,, ok ,,,, well,, ahem
  • and johnny sets the camera to record and rushes over to sit beside you on the bench,,,pretending to look over at the other side of the park
  • and you’re like “oh,,,,shh ,,,, shh what? h- he isn’t cute???? i- what??? you want me to ask for his number???”
  • johnny turns around,,,putting his arm over the bench and going “are you talking to your dog?” and you jump a little almost forgetting the line and you’re like 
  • “i,,,,im not,,,,,” and johnny, effortlessly slides closer to you on the bench and is like “well, whoever told you to ask for my number is right - do you want it?”
  • feeling your cheeks glow red you nod and johnny is supposed to lean in closer but you’re kinda like !!! so you lift mr. squiggles up and he licks at johnny’s face and ,,,, after a moment you’re like im sorry!!!!! that wasn’t in the script
  • but johnny bursts into laughter and is like you know what,,,i think it’s a great ending shot 
  • you realize you’re close to having to drop the pups off so you gather mr. squiggles and tell johnny it was,,,,fun and that you hope he gets a good grade
  • johnny seems to want to say something,,, but you’re like im not avoiding you this time - i actually really need to go
  • and as you’re running back to get the rest of the dogs you hear him call out your name and he’s like “let me repay you with dinner sometime???” and you’re like “sounds good!!!”
  • after getting back to campus from work, you drop your things off in your dorm and you check your phone to see a text from johnny
  • ‘are you free tomorrow night?’ you smile,,,,thinking for a second and your roommate is like why do you look so happy - is it a date????? and you’re like WHAT,,,,,,NO,,,,,,,SHUTUP
  • but you say you are and the next night you meet up with johnny off campus and he’s telling you about this restaurant a friend of his opened and then you notice it,,,, the slight darkness under his eyes and you’re like johnny did you sleep??
  • and he’s like oh no i stayed up editing,,,, also this afternoon i had to help hyungsik with his shooting so 
  • and you’re like oh my god go home and sleep but he’s like no!! i gotta take you out and pay you for your help,,,,,and since i don’t have actual money please consider this food as payment
  • and you’re like shdlfkjds johnny and he’s like it’s good food,,,,,so???
  • even though he’s obviously tired,,, johnny still manages to keep up an exciting conversation and you try to get him to split the bill but he’s like nooooooo i am a respectful chicago gentleman 
  • and ur like ,,, does a respectful chicago gentleman try to mimic a parrot in a resturant and he’s like i see your point but let me live?
  • and johnny is ,,,, someone you never thought you’d hang out with one on one just because he’s bright and attracts attention 
  • and he’s a silly, handsome guy??? like???? getting near him seems like a feat but here you are,,, after diner walking to the arcade and johnny winning you a stuffed animal in one of those crane games but also completely losing to you in tekken 5
  • and you’re like,,,,, it’s nice to be like this with him and it’d be nice,,,,,,, to get to know him more
  • so you’re sad when the night ends and you guys are on your way back to uni on a crowded train and johnny keeps moving his body so no one is squishing up against you and it’s ,,,,,,,,, it is like a date but you refuse to let yourself cave to that mentality
  • but then as you get off at your stop, johnny’s hand slides into yours and it’s ,,,,, natural almost
  • and you get to campus and he’s like thanks for letting me take you out,,,and for being in my film
  • and you’re like haha,,, to quote you - no sweat!!! 
  • and it’s silent,,,but you’re still holding hands and you’re not quite sure what that means
  • until johnny goes “i don’t want to be awkward but - this was a date, right? can i call it a date?”
  • and you’re like OH WELL,,,,,,,,,um,,,,,,,,, and you’re like “i’d like if it was a date,,,,”
  • and johnny is like me too because then that means there can be more,,,,,dates,,,,,,,,for us,,,,,,,for me to take you on,,,,,,,,,am i making sense i feel like im not making sense
  • but you’re like!!!!! you are,,,,making sense,,,,,,
  • johnny grins and even in the nights dark light you can see the cute expression on his face and you’re like hey can you bend forward a little bit and he’s like oh?
  • and you lean up, kissing his cheek quickly before letting go of his hand and saying that you’ll see him ,,,, on the second date???
  • and you’re halfway across the quad to your dorm when you hear someone running behind you and you turn just to be tackled into a hug
  • and it’s johnny,,, you can tell by the way his hair tickles your cheeks and his frame is wide and he smells,,,,so distinct 
  • and he’s like “sorry,,i couldn’t wait till the second date,,,” and you’re like fldkjsde please,,,,
  • but it’s cute haha when he lets you go you guys wave goodbye and when you get home your roommate is like “ah, so how was the date?” and you’re like IT WASNT —- ok it was and it was amazing
  • dating johnny,,, is exactly what you all expect it to be
  • he’s an affection moNSTER and i mean that in the BEST way possible like he is FULL of love to give at ALL TIMES
  • forehead kisser extraordinaire 
  • showers you in compliments and talks about you to everyone he meets honestly the night after your first date ten,,,,,,in his pajamas half awake had to listen to johnny talk for exactly one hour and forty three minutes about everything that happened between you two and at the end of the night ten was like “i got it,,,,they sparkle like the stars in the sky ok can i go sleep- yes you told me about how they remind you of the best days of summer ok im going to sleep now jOHNNY SHUT UP”
  • for someone whose confident in their skills,,,, johnny got shy about showing you the end project of his film but when he did he was like “did you like it??” and you’re like yes!! im sorry for my bad acting also mr.squiggles says hi
  • and johnny is like tbh i love that dog and ur like more than me and he’s like yeah and ur like thats cool i love him more than i love you too
  • johnny: WHAT
  • you: dogs > boys, a cardinal rule
  • also you learned from jaehyun that the reason johnny stayed up all night to edit was because he was apparently watching the clips of you over and over again and being like they’re so cute,,,,
  • and you’re like no way
  • and jaehyun was like you don’t have to believe me but ten has a video and ten is like i do wanna see
  • and it’s true,,,,,johnny literally was sitting at his computer with the goofiest grin on his face looking at you like they’re adorable,,,, ft. ten’s snickering in the bg
  • johnny doesnt know ten took the video,,,, but when he found out he chased him across campus but tbh you just thought it was super cute of your boyfriend 
  • is tall and therefore whenever it rains he does this thing where he puts his hands over your head and is like “im ur umbrella” and you’re like ,,,,, im still getting wet and he’s like “,,,,,,,,,,listen im not a GOOD umbrella, but im YOUR umbrella” and you’re like oh my god you’re a dork that’s what you are and you’re my dork so it’s ok
  • johnny calls you love unironically and you’re like are you british or and he’s like WOW LET ME BE CUTE WITH YOU PLEASE 
  • once mark drew a flower on your wrist or something and johnny was like draw one on me too and mark was like why and johnny was like because we’re a couple mark and i want to match
  • im just saying johnny seo is a corny couple items guy like look at the man
  • thinks the most useless things are cute and buys them for you and you’re like johnny i didn’t really need this mickey mouse ice cream scooper and he’s like ok but it’s cute tho??? and ur like saVE YOUR MONEY YOUR MINOR IS BUSINESS And johnny is like IM TRYING IM AN IMPULSE SPENDER 
  • also everything cute just seemingly reminds him of you like the boy is heart eyes for you ok
  • probably a really loose-lipped drunk,,,,, honestly texts you like paragraphs about how he’s going to make a movie dedicated to you but the typing is l1k3 th*$ 
  • he’s late to dates a lot but not because he doesn’t care or something but because he’s always busy helping someone film and you don’t mind but you’re like johnny take a break and he’s like i will but also hyuk was telling me about this sci-fi animation he’s gonna do and he might need me-
  • and you just motion for him to open his mouth so you can put some food in it and you’re like shhh just eat first talk later (this is hard since johnny loves to talk,,,,,,,,,)
  • is dramatic about anniversaries and holidays but it’s romantic and cheesy like yes he bought you bear the same size as him for valentines day and YES he recited a monologue from ‘the notebook’ to you on your birthday because that’s who johnny is 
  • texts you about what outfit to wear and you’re like huh what is that and johnny is like im going though a hippie phase should i wear this tie-dye t-shirt OR this tie-dye t-shirt
  • and you’re like wear a white t-shirt right now johnny and put the tie-die away
  • him: but baby i-
  • you: right now. away.
  • asks you for updates on mr. squiggles and you once told the owner your boyfriend really likes their dog and the owner was DELIGHTED she invited johnny and you to dinner and it was,,,,,,the most funny thing
  • to see johnny get tipsy on wine and gush over movies from the thirties with this little old lady????? priceless 
  • johnny: you know she’s much older now but bettie davis was a hottie,,,,,
  • you: oh my god
  • johnny: i won’t lie,,,,,im still into john travolta the man hasn’t aged-
  • you: put the drink down
  • when you guys talk on the phone,,,,you’ve noticed that johnny’s voice gets lower at night and it’s really nice and you’ll never tell him because you know he’ll tease you but,,,,,,wow
  • speaking of other really nice things johnny had invited you over to his dorm while ten was away with family and you guys were supposed to use the blank wall and project some movies on it and cuddle
  • but at some point the movie was the last thing on your mind because johnny’s half-lidded eyes and lips spread apart are PRETTY hard to ignore
  • also johnny is such a,,,,,physical person that he knows what to do with his hands and his mouth and long story short you ended up tangled in mr seo
  • and only after did you realize that the movie was over and you were like ,,,,,, should i play another one
  • and johnny pulling you right back ontop of him was like no no there’s more important things to do
  • johnny is a show off when it comes to relationships so the next day doyoung was eating and was like whats that on your neck - you got a rash?
  • and johnny was like nah my s/o stayed the night and doyoung was like oh and mark choked on his rice
  • does this thing that when he’s thinking to fast he’ll switch from korean to english and then backtrack and translate what he said and sometime’s he’ll stutter over this or that
  • and you’re like johnny you’re so cute but gather your thougths you don’t alWAYS have to be talking
  • and he’s just like,,,,,,,,,,you’re right but tbh if im not talking what can my mouth be doing and you’re like rolling your eyes but you’re like “kissing me?”
  • and he grins like eXACTLY come here
  • you guys kiss a lot just so you know like wanna know something about johnny? he’d kiss you till you were breathless jot that down
  • you asked him where his backpack was once and johnny was like i dont carry one everythings in my head
  • and you’re like what about that test in finance that you’re gonna have and his eyes got wide and he’s like i,,,,,,,,,,gtg get the notes off of someone see you later
  • told you his dream vacation isn’t chicago anymore,,,,like he wants to see his family so bad but he also wants to take a roadtrip with you and see you under all those stars beside him
  • and you were like we should do it sometime but i have a feeling we’d open the trunk and ten would be there
  • also you know this conversation has happened like one too many times
  • ten: you know, if you two have kids i want to be the godfather
  • you: what if we don’t, what if we adopt a cat or something
  • ten: then i want to be the godfather of the cat duh
  • you:
  • johnny: you know it ten, we’re brothers for life come and hug me
  • as silly and as romantic and fun as johnny is,,,,,he’s still got some reservations about himself and sometimes he jokingly,,,,mentions that it must be hard to love someone like him - always making mistakes or saying something embarrassing
  • but you always assure him that people aren’t supposed to be perfect, that you think he’s damn near close to it and you wouldn’t stop loving him over things that are only human
  • but if he does call you banana pumpkin angel in front of your friends again- and johnny is like fine fine ill stop using fruits for petnames,,,,,,,,,,,,my cherry sunshine universe and you’re like WHY do you INSIST ON BEING SO CORNY
  • and he’s like dont’ you love it though???? secretly??? just a little
  • and you’re like,,,,,,,,,,,fine yes i do god no wonder you’re a film major your brain is TOO Creative for it’s own good
  • johnny kissing up your arms to tickle you and make you feel better when you’re sad
  • also johnny would completely 100% let you borrow his sweaters and even if you’re wearing one just because it’s comfy and you have study hall 
  • he’d lean over to the person beside you two and be like “they’re wearing my clothes, don’t they look cute?” and the person is like ???? and you’re pulling johnny back over to you by the ear and you’re like boy
  • calls up the uni radio and requests that they play your favorite song every weekend without failure
  • and you’ll hear it and even if you’re not with johnny you can feel your heart burst because he’s the kind of boyfriend that remembers the smallest little details and shows you his love whenever he can
  • and there’s nothing better than having someone adore you like johnny seo adores you 

doyoung | jaehyuntaeyong | yuta | bangtan | vixx | monsta x | got7 + kard + amber | seventeen

My Reaction Monday 7--1x10



^Hey boys… we saw that. You aren’t hiding anything from US!



















But then you laugh because there is something so charming about this weird ass kid with his brutal honesty and slight immaturity.

 





We all saw that, right?



And just like Ian we all die waiting for Mickey to come around.

Mini ladd: Do you think the ocean is salty because the land never waves back?

Ohmwrecker: Why are babies in the womb for nine months but aren’t nine months old when they’re born?

H20Delirious: Why is Monday so far from Friday but Friday so close to Monday?

Cartoonz: Can a crip donate blood?

Panda: Can a teacher give a homeless kid homework?

Bryce: What color are mirrors?

Nogla: What does water taste like?

Vanoss: If I weigh 99 pounds and eat a pound of nachos, am I 1% nacho?

Terroriser: If sperm makes babies and is found in testicales then ball really is life.

Wildcat: WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING!!

X-Files Episodes Organized by Philosophical Topic

Metaphysics

Fatalism: Clyde Bruckman’s Final Repose (3.4), Monday (6.14) 
Interactionism: Shadows (1.5), Fire (1.11), Excelsis Dei (2.11)
Determinism, compatibalism, and/or human freedom: Aubrey (2.12) , Clyde Bruckman’s Final Repose (3.4), Syzygy (3.13), Wetwired (3.23), Talitha Cumi (3.24), Synchrony (4.19)
Disembodied existence: Shadows (1.5), Beyond the Sea (1.12), End Game (2.17), Elegy (4.22)
Personal agency/autonomy: Ice (1.8), Pusher (3.17), Hell Money (3.19), Kitsunegari (5.8), Empedocles (8.17)
Personal identity: Lazarus (1.15), Born Again (1.21), End Game (2.17), The List (3.05), Apocrypha (3.16), Herrenvolk (4.1), The Field Where I Died (4.5), Dreamland (6.4), Dreamland II (6.5)
Psychological continuity: End Game (2.17), Herrenvolk (4.1), The Field Where I Died (4.5)
Reincarnation: Lazarus (1.14), Born Again (1.21), The List (3.5), The Field Where I Died (4.5)
Time travel (see David Lewis): Synchrony (4.19)
Parallel universes: 4-D (9.4)

Epistemology

Belief [This is a major theme in the entire series, but it is especially prevalent in these episodes] (see James, Clifford): Beyond the Sea (1.12), E.B.E. (1.16), Colony (2.16), Quagmire (3.22), S.R. 819 (6.9)
Cartesian skepticism: How the Ghosts Stole Christmas (6.6), Field Trip (6.21), Via Negativa (8.7)
General epistemology: Clyde Bruckman’s Final Repose (3.4), Jose Chung’s From Outer Space (3.20), Musings of a Cigarette Smoking Man (4.7), Demons (4.23), Bad Blood (5.12)
Pragmatism: The Erlenmeyer Flask (1.23), Little Green Men (2.1), all things (7.17)
Fideism: all things (7.17)   

Ethics

Animal ethics: Red Museum (2.10), Fearful Symmetry (2.18)
Biomedical ethics: Eve (1.10), Colony (2.16)
Divine command theory ethics: Revelations (3.11)
Environmental ethics: Darkness Falls (1.19), Quagmire (3.22)
Ethical subjectivism: Home (4.3)
Ethics of scientific research: Demons (4.23)
Kantian ethics: Home (4.3), Small Potatoes (4.20)
“Lifeboat” ethics: Død Kalm (2.19)
Moral relativism: Excelsis Dei (2.11), Fresh Bones (2.15), Hell Money (3.19), Teso Dos Bichos (3.18), Kaddish (4.12)
Moral responsibility: Irresistible (2.13)
Virtue ethics: Apocrypha (3.16), Avatar (3.21), Zero-Sum (4.21)
Moral education: Home (4.3)

Philosophy of mind

Artificial intelligence: Ghost in the Machine (1.6), Kill Switch (5.11)

Philosophy of religion

Faith and reason: Revelations (3.11), All Souls (5.17)
Religious ambiguity: Essence (8.20), Improbable (9.13)

Philosophy of science

Abductive inference (see Peirce): Pilot (1.1)
Axiological & normative issues in scientific research: Ice (1.7), Young at Heart (1.15), Soft Light (2.23) 
Folk theories and scientific explanations: Teliko (4.4)
The “Unexplanable”: Without (8.2), Invocation (8.5), Dæmonicus (9.3)
Paradigm shifts (see Kuhn): The Erlenmeyer Flask (1.23)

Political philosophy

Government’s proper role in society: Blood (2.3), Musings of a Cigarette Man (4.7), The Pine Bluff Variant (5.18)
Freedom of Religion: Roadrunners (8.4)

Existentialism

Beyond the Sea (1.12), Jose Chung’s From Outer Space (3.20), Talitha Cumi (3.24)

At some point a few years ago, I fell out of love with music. On tour, I’d stay in the darkness of my bunk all day until soundcheck, struggle to hold a conversation during meet & greets, then barely make it through the shows without counting down the minutes until they were over. At home, it wasn’t much different. I was apathetic toward the album we were making and toward my abilities as a songwriter, so I slept all day, drank all night, and distracted myself with new people who weren’t really even my friends. I lost the ability to care, and I lost the ability to feel anything. I didn’t love me, so why should you? It was the darkest period of my life. I planned a solo trip to Alaska with the intention of never making music again when I returned.

Thanks to fate intervening, the day before I left for Alaska I had a chance encounter with my longtime friend Matt Beckley. As the story goes, I ran into Matt at a cafe in Los Angeles, and he asked me to join him back at his new house to check out his studio and maybe write some music. (I’d like to think Matt’s extraordinary intuition knew I was in the darkest before the dawn phase). We went back to the house, opened a bottle of Stranahan’s, and didn’t write a single fucking note. Instead, we just sat around and talked about what we loved about music in the first place. Bruce Springsteen, Bryan Adams, The Gin Blossoms, Tom Petty, you know the rest. We talked about where we’d love to see music GO. We both wanted to move the needle and we both wanted to chase great in a world full of just good. As I was leaving that night, Matt said to me, “Go to Alaska and stop thinking about what you’re gonna do when you fail. Think about all the things you’re going to do when you win.’

That was the moment that DALES was born.

Over the next 2 years, Matt and I began writings songs together. A lot of songs. The best songs I’d ever written in my life. I was alive again. Writing with no destination, no business plan, and absolutely no fear. For the first time in a long time, I was making music simply because I loved it.

After a while, I decided that these songs were a different chapter of my life, a new story, and I put them away while The Summer Set finished Stories For Monday. Then that record came out and we went on tour. Then, unfortunately the darkness came back. I lost that fire in my soul I had finally just found again. So, I spent every minute I had when we weren’t on tour, locked in the studio at Matt’s house trying to feed the flame that gave me my love for music back.

Here we are now.

At this time, I have carefully decided that I don’t want to lose that spark anymore. It is in my best interest to follow my heart and dive head first into this new adventure. I want to finish these songs, play them live, and give the world the DALES record I think it needs to hear. The record I NEED to hear. I’m an all or nothing kinda guy and a terrible multi-tasker, so if I’m finally gonna do something…I want to give it everything I’ve got.

With that being said, unfortunately that means The Summer Set will not be making any records or touring plans indefinitely.

To John, Stephen, Jess, And Josh:
I have loved this journey every single step of the way. On my best days and on my worst days. From The Modified Arts to The Macy’s Day Parade. We put more miles on that old van than dollars we may ever have in our bank accounts. (I still can’t believe we sold that van to a church.) This has been, and may always be my greatest ride.

John and Stephen- It is no secret you guys are well on your way to becoming two of the best music producers I know. If you blink, you’ll realize you’re already there. I can’t wait to see what you guys do next, and I can only hope one day we find our way into the studio (or at least the makeshift one we made in your shared bedroom in North Hollywood) someday again.

Jess- Your drumming and your friendship are among the most sturdy and reliable things I may ever find in this lifetime. You’re my sister. We fight a lot (Literally, you once beat the hell out of me in a Taco Bell parking lot in the middle of Texas), but I love you. You already have more drum gigs lined up than you know what to do with, and I will be your biggest fan along side everything you do.

Josh- There are no words to describe how valuable you are to this band, and to me personally. That became abundantly clear when you actually left the band. We tried to make Stories For Monday without you, failed, threw in the towel, asked for your opinion on the new songs, you told us it was our best work yet, told us we HAD to put the album out, and we told you we couldn’t do it WITHOUT YOU. So you jumped back in, without hesitation. You are our rock. You are there when we need you. You are there when I need you. You’re there when ANYONE needs you. There’s a reason you’re the first person anyone calls when they need advice or they’re in trouble. I hope life in Nashville is everything you want it to be, where I am sure you will figure out how to balance being a hit songwriter AND a future mayor at the same time.

To The Fans: All I can say is thank you. I never in my wildest dreams thought this would last 10 years. You were there for me on my worst of days, and I’m sorry I wasn’t always there for you in return. You guys stood by our side during the awkward teenage years, through the terrible haircuts (which thankfully, you can still google!) through growing up, and most importantly…through the blood, sweat, and tears of four albums and more tours than I can count. I’ve seen places around the world I never thought I’d see, all because of you. There is no home quite like a room full of you guys screaming back the songs we made together. Make no mistake, that will live forever and never die.

As for me, I’m on a lifelong journey searching for the right and the real. To learn how to feel everything again. To learn how to love and be loved in return.
To fall back in love with music. I was born to write songs and be on stage and I can’t believe I almost gave that up. It’s my greatest magic trick.

Bruce Springsteen once said, “Everything dies baby, that’s a fact, but maybe everything that dies…someday comes back.“

See you soon,

Brian Dales

So, because we’ve gotten a few asks recently and it’s Mod Monday, I figured I may as well make a post about my latest tattoo: the Yuri!!! on Ice inspired “Born to make history”.

People have asked me a couple times why I decided to get it and if I was being serious when I jokingly said if my blog got 15k, I’d get a yoi tattoo. I personally wouldn’t get something permanently on my body over a follower count. It was more of a way to treat myself because I planned on getting the tattoo anyway. I like having freedom over my body. I haven’t always had a lot of control and a tattoo is something that can’t be taken away. So yeah, I wouldn’t let Tumblr dictate whether I got ink or not. Lol

So why then? There are actually a lot of reasons I got this and some of them are kinda personal so I’m not going to really get too in depth here. Mostly, it was out of love for the show.

Obviously, the show itself spoke to me. A main character with anxiety and low self esteem? I relate so much, it’s unreal. History Maker, as I’m sure you know, isn’t just a song they threw in at the beginning. (Remember the time they put a song about sex in Black Butler? Yeah, not this anime.) The full song includes lyrics like “I’ve got a feeling it’s never too late” and the whole thing is just really inspiring to me. History Maker beautifully represents the struggle that Yuuri faces. Throughout the show, he learns to love himself. It’s beautiful. How many times am I allowed to say the words “inspiring” and “beautiful” in one paragraph before my blog gets deleted? Eh, one more for good measure: this entire show is beautiful and inspiring… These words are literally how I explain the show to everyone who hasn’t seen it.

Anyway, I went with the line “Born to make history” because it’s a pretty clear nod to the show (among fans) and OP while also being able to stand on its own without context.

I may not like myself now but I’m working on it and having these words on my arm reminds me that it isn’t too late. They give me a reason to keep fighting, just like Yuuri did. I’m so glad that I’m able to wake up and see this tattoo every day and I’m super thankful for all of the nice comments from people. You guys are awesome!

Lots of love and yummy katsudon,
Mod Star

dailymail.co.uk
Meet the college student Harry Styles wrote the song 'Carolina' about

The mystery girl who pop star Harry Styles wrote about in love song ‘Carolina’ is a beautiful 20-year-old college student he met on a blind date, DailyMail.com can reveal.

The star was clearly bowled over by pretty brunette Townes Adair Jones who he met in Los Angeles a couple of years ago.

And the One Direction heartthrob decided to include her - and details of their memorable liaison - on his self-titled debut solo album.

DailyMail.com can reveal that Styles, 23, met Townes through mutual friends of her sister, actress Gilland Jones, while on a break from recording his album.

Keep reading

Always Here

Eighth of my new Soulmate au stories.

Tag list: @rabidwrestlingfan @wrestlingnoob @anonwriter-lady @somehow-lovable-trash @youngandbiitter @meowmeowp @waystobcwickcd @andy-blur @padfoot13 @fangeekkk @tardis1967

Warnings: None. I was a good girl.

Summary: From an early age you realised you were able to communicate with your soulmate by writing on your skin.

Word Count: 3945

HARRY HOOK X READER

Keep reading

Shameless Monday Pic!!!
I’m a natural born Scorpio, so I have absolutely no SHAME. Goodbye Cartagena…. See you in a couple of months!
#kaibell #kbswim #kbfit #kaibellcollection #noshame

Okay but imagine Marcus and Oliver start making bets on the outcome of Quidditch matches during their final year

  • Before the last match, that will decide who wins the Quidditch House Cup, Marcus tells Oliver “I bet you my first born child that Slytherin wins.” 
  • Oliver smirks and says “You’re on, Flint.” 
  • The Monday after Gryffindor wins the Cup, Oliver looks over at Marcus before Potions and asks, “Oi Flint, you really going to give me your first born child since my team beat yours?” 
  • Marcus replies, “Well, maybe we could have a kid together so I could keep my firstborn and still fulfill the bet. ‘Course, we should probably go on a date first. You free Saturday?”
  • Oliver stands stunned for a full minute before giving Marcus a small smile and replying, “Hogsmade?”
  • Years later, when they’ve both retired from professional Quidditch, Oliver is sitting in their living room reading the Daily Prophet when Marcus walks in and says, “Hey, remember when I bet you my first born child over the Quidditch House Cup?” 
  • Oliver looks up, incredibly confused because how could Marcus think he forgot about the thing that made them start dating in the first place? 
  • And then he realizes Marcus is holding adoption pamphlets. 

My All Time Playlist
1. Ain’t no rest for the wicked - cage the elephant
2. Airplanes - 5 seconds of summer
3. All the small things - blink-182
4. All too well - Taylor swift
5. Alleyways - the neighborhood
6. Anna sun - walk the moon
7. Anti-Christ - the 1975
8. Anywhere but here - mayday parade
9. Arabella- Arctic monkeys
10. Backseat serenade - all time low
11. Be my escape - reliant k
12. Beverly Hills - Weezer
13. Bright - echosmith
14. Can you feel my heart - bring me the horizon
15. Candle (sick and tired) - the white tie affair
16. Car radio - twenty one pilots
17. Careless whisper - Alex Gaskarth, Juliet Simms, & 3oh!3
18. Carousel- Melanie Martinez
19. Centuries - fall out boy
20. Check yes Juliet - we the kings
21. Chocolate - the 1975
22. Cinderblock garden - all time low
23. Circles - all time low
24. The city - the 1975
25. Colors - Halsey
26. Control - Halsey
27. A daydream away - all time low
28. Dear Maria, Count me in - all time low
29. Disconnected - 5 seconds of summer
30. Do I wanna know - arctic monkeys
31. Dog days are over - Florence and the machines
32. Doubt - twenty one pilots
33. Dream - rocky loves Emily
34. Dreamers - hopium
35. Drive - Halsey
36. Drown - bring me the horizon
37. Emperor’s new clothes - panic! At the disco
38. Empty gold - Halsey
39. English girls - the Maine
40. Fairly local - twenty one pilots
41. Fat lip - sum 41
42. The feeling - Justin bieber ft Halsey
43. Forever stuck in our youth - set it off
44. The fortunate - cartel
45. Freaking me out - simple plan ft Alex Gaskarth
46. Gasoline - Halsey
47. Ghost - Halsey
48. Girl like that - every avenue
49. The girl’s a straight up hustler - all time low
50. Girls - the 1975
51. Girls freak me out- the summer set
52. Give me love - Ed Sheeran
53. Goner - twenty one pilots
54. Goodnight moon - go radio
55. Hallelujah - Jason Castro
56. Hallelujah - panic! At the disco
57. Heart out - the 1975
58. Heavydirtysoul - twenty one pilots
59. Here - Alesia cara
60. Hide away - daya
61. High school never ends - bowling for soup
62. Hit the ground - Justin bieber
63. Hold me down - Halsey
64. Hometown - twenty one pilots
65. Hopeless romantics - make out Monday
66. House of gold - twenty one pilots
67. Howlin for you - the black keys
68. Hurricane - Halsey
69. I miss you - blink-182
70. I write sins not tragedies - panic! At the disco
71. I’d hate to be you when people find out who this song is about - mayday parade
72. I’ll be - Edwin McCain
73. I’m ready - jack’s mannequin
74. If it means a lot to you - a day to remember
75. If you wanted a song written about you all you had to do was ask - mayday parade
76. Immortals - fall out boy
77. In too deep - sum 41
78. Invisible - 5 seconds of summer
79. Is there somewhere - Halsey
80. Jamie all over - mayday parade
81. Jasey Rae acoustic - all time low
82. Jersey - mayday parade
83. Jet black heart - 5 seconds of summer
84. Just the girl - the click five
85. Kids in the dark - all time low
86. Kissing in cars - pierce the veil
87. Knee socks - Arctic monkeys
88. Lived a lie - you me at six
89. Livin on a prayer - Bon jovi
90. Long live the king - James Arthur
91. Long way home - 5 seconds of summer
92. Lost in stereo- all time low
93. A love like war - all time Low ft Vic Fuentes
94. Love me like you do - Alex Gaskarth
95. Love yourself - Justin bieber
96. Lullabies - all time low
97. Manners - we are the in crowd
98. Midnight city - m83
99. Miles away - Memphis May Fire ft kellin quinn
100. Miserable at best - mayday parade
101. Miss Jackson - panic! At the disco
102. Missing you - all time low
103. Molly make out - the Friday night boys
104. Mr. Brightside - the killers
105. My own worst enemy - lit
106. My songs know what you did in the dark - fall out boy
107. Naive - the kooks
108. Never be - 5 seconds of summer
109. New Americana - Halsey
110. Night changes - one direction
111. Nightmare - rocky loves Emily
112. Nine in the afternoon - panic! At the disco
113. No one can touch us - sing it loud ft Alex Gaskarth
114. Number five - the spotlight ft Alex Gaskarth
115. Ocean avenue - yellowcard
116. Once bitten, twice shy - great white
117. Once upon a dream - Lana del Rey
118. One love - bob Marley
119. Paradise city - guns n roses
120. The party scene - all time low
121. Photograph - Ed Sheeran
122. Pour some sugar on me - def leppard
123. R u mine? - Arctic monkeys
124. Remembering Sunday - all time low
125. Renegades - x ambassadors
126. right girl - the Maine
127. Robbers - the 1975
128. Semi charmed life - third eye blind
129. Settle down - the 1975
130. Seven nation army - the white stripes
131. Sex - the 1975
132. Shameless - all time low
133. She makes dirty words sound pretty - Vic Fuentes
134. She way out - the 1975
135. Sippy cup - Melanie Martinez
136. Six feet under the stars - all time low
137. Skinny love - Bon iver
138. Skyway avenue - we the kings
139. Slow - Halsey
140. Smells like teen spirit - nirvana
141. Social casualty - 5 seconds of summer
142. Somewhere in Neverland - all time low
143. Sophomore slump - fall out boy
144. Stacy’s mom - fountains of Wayne
145. Stained glass eyes and colorful tears - pierce the veil
146. Stars - adelaie
147. Stay - mayday parade
148. Stay awake - all time low
149. Staying up - the neighborhood
150. Stella - all time low
151. Stolen dance - milky chance
152. Stressed out - twenty one pilots
153. Sugar we’re going down - fall out boy
154. Summertime sadness - Lana del Rey
155. Sweater weather - the neighborhood
156. Sweet child o mine - guns n roses
157. Tear in my heart - twenty one pilots
158. Teenagers - my chemical romance
159. Tell me I’m a wreck - every avenue
160. Terrible things - mayday parade
161. Throne - bring me the horizon
162. To build a home - the cinematic orchestra
163. Tonight you’re perfect - new politics
164. Twixter - make out Monday
165. Uma Thurman - fall out boy
166. Unpredictable - 5 seconds of summer
167. Unsteady - x ambassadors
168. Vapor - 5 seconds of summer
169. Vegas - all time low
170. Voodoo child - Jimi Hendrix
171. Walk this way - Aerosmith
172. Waste the night - 5 seconds of summer
173. Weightless - all time low
174. When I get home you’re so dead - mayday parade
175. When the day met the night - panic! At the disco
176. Woah oh! - forever the sickest kids
177. Why’d you only call me when you’re high? - Arctic monkeys
178. Wonderless - pierce the veil
179. Wrapped around your finger - 5 seconds of summer
180. You be the anchor… - mayday parade
181. You’re so creepy - ghost town
182. Young god - Halsey
183. Your soul - hippie sabotage
184. Youth - daughter
185. 2 heads - Coleman hell
186. 18 - anarbor
187. 1985 - bowling for Soup

Adding
188. Left Alone - Sleeping With Sirens
189. All I Want - Kodaline
190. Holy - PVRIS
191. Long Way Down - Robert Delong
192. Heart - Flor
193. I Swear This Time I Mean It - Mayday Parade
194. 12 Through 15 - Mayday Parade
195. We Don’t Believe What’s On TV - twenty one pilots
196. The Great Escape - boys like girls
197. Here Comes the Sun - The Beatles
198. Garden - Halsey
199. Ocean and Atlantic- Mayday Parade
200. Floral & Fading - Pierce The Veil
201. Forest - twenty one pilots
202. The Sound - The 1975
203. Lithium - Nirvanna
204. Closer - The Chainsmokers feat. Halsey

205. Guys my age - hey violet
206. I Don’t Wanna Live Forever -Zayn and Taylor Swift
207. Lurk - the neighborhood
208. Secrets- state champs
209. Gold steps - neck deep
210. Freak - Lana del Rey
211. Rhiannon - Fleetwood Mac
212. Dirty laundry - all time low
213. Famous last words - my chemical romance
214. Holy Ghost - borns
215. Am I pretty? - the Maine
216. Misery - the Maine
217. Gooey - Glass Animals
218. Greek tragedy - the wombats
219. Hendrix - wyclef jean
220. Dirty laundry - All Time Low
221. First - Cold War Kids
222. Take Me out - Franz Ferdinand
223. Now or Never - Halsey
224. One day - Kodaline
225. Talk - Kodaline
226. Bad at love - Halsey
227. Good Times - All Time Low
8

Doris Day is actually 95. Who knew? Not even her

To Doris Day’s many admirers, the pert and fresh-faced charmer who starred in “Pillow Talk” and “Move Over Darling” is ageless.

But Day turns 95 on Monday — which is a birthday surprise to even the star herself, who has long pegged her age to a 1924 birthdate that would make her 93. Media outlets have variously reported her as between 93 and 95.

A copy of Day’s birth certificate, obtained by The Associated Press from Ohio’s Office of Vital Statistics, settles the issue: Doris Mary Kappelhoff, her pre-fame name, was born on April 3, 1922, making her 95. Her parents were Alma and William Kappelhoff of Cincinnati.

“I’ve always said that age is just a number and I have never paid much attention to birthdays, but it’s great to finally know how old I really am!” Day said in a statement Sunday. (Photos: AP)

so here it is,  April 4th.   and MY personal opinion ,   today was the day kurt died.

just call it a hunch.    born on a monday, ,married on a monday.   and with his twisted way of looking at things,  died on a monday.  which was april 4th , 1994.

kurt,  still missed after all these years.   and still selling magazines, and with people hanging on to your image and the bucks it makes……causing blogs to get deleted.     I bet you laughed.

however, things end and others begin.  this is the first “april” note on the new blog.  

darn you kurt.    you should be around.   getting banned from twitter, tearing up

deviantart.   instead,  there’s just a empty spot in rock,  the world, my heart.

but really.  you loved your fans.   you were very nice to that girl in chicago (me) all those years ago.   I’ll never forget that.

Rest in Peace, Kurt.      twenty three years……..this year it’s worse than ever.

 but I will remain  ,  forever……..PHINEAS4COBAIN