i was blushing and like i don't fancy this guy

  • Ivy: why did you have me contact Gabe instead of your boyfriend?
  • Oswald: what are you talking about? i don't date
  • Ivy: you honesty expect me to believe that guy you were on top of at the fancy rich people party wasn't your boyfriend? suuuuure
  • Oswald: it wasn't like that!
  • Ivy: you're blushing! you two were totally together!
  • Oswald: he's the one who shot me!
  • Ivy: ...
  • Oswald: ...
  • Ivy: Selina and Bruce are off again too, you could have told me you guys had hit a rough patch, i get it
  • Oswald: >:(
He Needs to Pick Up a Better Line
  • At night, when Genos and Saitama are washing up after dinner.
  • Genos: Sensei?
  • Saitama: Yeah?
  • Genos: Did it hurt when you fell?
  • Saitama: When I fell from the moon, you mean? Nah, just gave me sore knees.
  • Genos: That's not what- wait, do you still have sore knees?
  • Saitama and Genos round the conversation out to Genos giving his sensei a massage around his knees. Saitama is relaxed and he knows it's the perfect chance.
  • Genos: Sensei, may I live in your shoes? Because I want to be with you every step of the way.
  • Saitama: *gentle snore*
  • Genos: Tomorrow then.
  • ****************
  • The next day, Genos and Saitama are on a walk around town.
  • Genos: *fiddling with his phone when he gets an idea* Saitama-Sensei, I think there's something wrong with my phone.
  • Saitama: What's wrong?
  • Genos: You're number's not in it.
  • Saitama: That's because I don't have a phone, dude.
  • Genos: That's not- never mind.
  • ****************
  • Genos and Saitama are eating noodles at an udon shop.
  • Genos: Sensei, you make my heart catch fire.
  • Saitama: Dude, that's not good, maybe you should call your doctor about that.
  • Genos: What?
  • Saitama: You're not supposed to catch fire, let's go see Dr. Kuseno.
  • Genos: ...yes, sensei.
  • ****************
  • Genos: Sensei, you have to tie your shoes, I don't want you falling for anyone else but me.
  • Saitama: I wear boots, Genos.
  • Genos: *long suffering sigh*
  • ****************
  • Saitama and Genos are at a hero party, dressed up and fancy for the locals and their fellow heroes.
  • Genos: *leaning over to whisper in Saitama's ear* Saitama Sensei, what does it feel like to be the most beautiful person in the room?
  • Saitama: *thoughtful* I don't know. Hey Mumen, what's it like to be the most beautiful person in the room?
  • Mumen: *blushes and stutters*
  • Genos: *internal screaming*
  • ****************
  • Genos: Sensei, are you the moon? Because even when it's dark, you still seem to shine.
  • Saitama: ARE YOU CALLING ME BALD?!
  • Genos: I'm calling you hot, Sensei.
  • Saitama: Oh cool, I love how guys can just compliment other guys, you know?
  • Genos: I'm FLIRTING WITH YOU.
  • Saitama: Oh... So that means you like me?
  • Genos: Very much, yes... Do you like me?
  • Saitama: Yeah.
  • *awkward silence*
  • Saitama: Wanna make out?
  • Genos: YES PLEASE.