i wanted to try that mosaic thing

Aftermath Afterthoughts

It’s far after midnight & I can’t sleep. Again.
The rain’s pouring softly against the window as mother moon kisses my skin. Cold. Harsh.
I feel the light, play with my left hand’s fingers in the air, move them smoothly - like in some wicked yet naive fairy dance. Pale skin, blue veins, some smaller scars. This moment; I try to capture it by closing my eyes & trying to memorise every detail:
The light in which here & there a dust particle follows its way through space, the blank mosaic that mirrors as shadows on my blanket. It’s so … peaceful. War is over. Voldemort lost for once & for ever.
I open my eyes. I see. I see it but I don’t want to. Pictures flashing in my mind. Dumbledore falling. Hogwarts burning. Harry in Hagrid’s arms.
I hate these memories. I did things I never should’ve done. This mark will be there. All the time. Reminding me of my failures. The war might be over, but it’s still inside me, in my head - fighting endless & pointless.
Wounds will heal anyway. The emptiness won’t get filled. I wish to erase my past, rewrite. It could’ve been different. It could’ve been with the right people. I … can’t understand why I did this; impressing my father, my mother? For whom & for what? My actions hurt. Not only me but others as well. Pressure forms coal into diamonds. I once have heard that from Hermione. Am I a diamond now? Hah! No. But who am I to blame rather then myself.
What do I want? I don’t know. Or I know but I’m just too cowardly to ask, too scared to just doing it. I shouldn’t let my past swallow me & spit me out again. Easier said than done - for sure. I want to be me but who is me anyway …
Harry knows who he is, even that Weasley boy. But I?
I so hate myself & I can’t show it to anyone. It’s always referring to ending up in that “stone cold grey-eyed ghostly-pale son of a deatheater”.
I have to be untouchable & unreachable. Always have to be distant, head held high. Why was I so easy to get influenced by wrong beliefs that shapes me into this … Monster. I am a monster. A true snake.
How often have I tried to wash, to scratch & to hex it away? Million times. I could cut it out, maybe that’ll help but .. I wouldn’t do it anyway.
I want to apologise. Apologise to Harry, Ron, Hermione, apologise to everyone I did wrong.
I feel misplaced, unable to cry, unable to breathe.
Unable to walk to him & tell him how I feel about him, ask him how I could do things better, what I could do so he accepts my apology.
He wouldn’t - I can’t even forgive myself. So how will he? How will anyone?
I love him.

___________

Big thank you to @queenofthyme for encouraging me to post my first text-thingy-story-whatever 💜🌸

Want

I want to paint the word love on your skin with my burgundy colored lips and cover up the burn marks my fingers left on your body when I was a bit too passionate….I want to run my fingers through your night-sky hair and watch those lips part for a dream to leave its confines and unveil before me; binding me to the image of you on a podium holding a noble prize in your hands I like to keep intwined with mine… I…I want to… I want to burn my tongue on a cup of tea, something I loathe ,after I lick the wounds these very lips would cause for I know that my words may bite the hard shell and seep inside a soul that resonates with mine… I will even want to scrub with my bare hands all the hurt I might cause you and piece for you a mosaic of the moments your smile was the only thing that I concentrated on….But above all else I want to roam in your being as you do so every moment in mine…
MT 26-4-2017

4

Dear followers and epically cool shaded Anons :3 You can expect a tutorial/walk through on faces and Frank and Gerard some time soon, but I just want to give you all a hopefully helpful tip/suggestion/spiel/thing that is probably going to sound annoying and tedious, but that’s just how I got on track with drawing.

Realism. Still life. Observational drawing.

Ugh. I know so many people and fellow artists that hate these, but you should remember that everything is hard at first. It’s like picking up a guitar for the first time - you aren’t going to be able to play like Ray Toro right that instant, but that’s no reason to hate guitar is it? The thing with realism is that it’s so vital, because even cartoons contain a certain degree of it. It’s just something you need unless you want to limit yourself to abstract stuff…

Plus, if you can draw stick figures, bam! You’re already doing basic realism. Technically. It’s also really great for spacial awareness and stuff like that :)

The most important thing with realism is actually looking at the subject you’re drawing. Whether that’s an image of Gerard or Frank or whatever that you’ve found off google images or an actual real life person or object that you’re drawing, you need to look at it. I should probably also say what you should be looking for too, so:

1) Distance. In the first stages of drawing - sketching, getting the proportions right is the most important thing. When you’re observing the subject you’re drawing, take note of the widths of the features - if it’s a face then look carefully at the distance between eyes, eyebrows, the widths of eyes, the width of the nose, the length of the nose, the width of the mouth (usually the corners of which vertically line up with the pupils), the distance between the lower lip and the bottom of the chin, everything. Try and get these onto your paper as accurately as you can, regardless of how it currently looks - if it looks messy, that’s fine because you have this great thing called an eraser :D

2) Shape. Once you have everything planned out and in the right places, then you can look at the shape of the features. I think here it’s good to associate them with the shapes of other common things, because it definitely will help you remember it for next time you want to draw it. Say if you think that the shape of Frank’s eye on it’s own (without eyelids and things) looks like an almond, then great - you know what an almond looks like, you’ll know what Frank’s eye looks like as you’re drawing it.

3) Highlights and shadows. Look carefully at the the direction of the light, the angles of the shadows, the shine. When shading, I like to try and flatten the 3D looking object to 2D in my head. I lightly mark off sections in the drawing that will be a particular shade - like a mosaic, like those ‘Paint By Numbers’ things - (“Sections labled 4 should be coloured coral red”). Again, bring in the distance thing. Look at how far that particular shade reaches across the the subject.

If you’re reading this and feeling a bit like “Woah… it’s so complicated…”, don’t worry. Basically, just draw what you see, but do it in stages. Don’t think that you have to draw like a printer and start at the top and work downwards or anything. Once you’ve got things in place, you can start defining features at any which one you feel like. You can begin shading wherever you like. Sometimes when I do portraits I like to see if I can start shading from a different feature each time.

Keep a neutral or positive attitude to your drawing. Turn on some music, pause every now and then to rock out to Planetary, whatever ( I personally find Danger Days is pretty motivational :3 ). But observational drawing doesn’t have to be painstaking or boring. It’s really important to be in a space of mind where it doesn’t matter if you screw up a little. Just keep at it, keep drawing and don’t ever stop.

Realism is certainly an amazing art form, but it’s also a very handy tool. Remember the more you do it, the easier it will get, and you’ll find that you’ll be reaching for your eraser less and less.

-mcd

accidental-rambler  asked:

klaroline prompt (post-canon?): it turns out Klaus is actually a cover hog and Caroline is not amused.

My first prompt ever! I hope you like - it’s short but I wanted to get something out because I was excited at the whole first prompt ever thing. I’m a dork.

Caroline waved frantically at Bonnie from the sidewalk before joining her at a table inside - they both had been dying to try Tessie’s since it opened up a few weeks ago in an old shotgun-style building off of Esplanade.  The café had a bohemian vibe with bright mosaic tile lining the walls, the centerpiece a chandelier crafted from stainless steel kitchen utensils. They’d heard the food was as quirky and fun as the decor and had made plans as soon as they could.

The girls placed their orders, chatting animatedly. They didn’t often have time to catch up these days; Bonnie studying for her undergrad at Tulane in Linguistics and Caroline focusing on developing an outreach program for newly-turned vamps, but they still tried to meet a few times a month to hang out. Maintaining their friendship would always be important to them both.

Bonnie was waving her hands about madly, something about arguing with her Latin professor over the root form of phaesmatos when Caroline stopped her. “I’m sorry. I’m so not paying attention, it’s freezing in here.” Caroline craned her neck to look at the ceiling, spotting the air vent. “Seriously, what’s up with this place? It’s like 30 degrees?” The air vent stared back, seemed to blow colder in response. Caroline stood, her chair screeching on the tile with the suddenness of movement. “Bon, I can’t do this, it feels like I’m having lunch in Antarctica.” She rubbed at her arms, trying to draw in some warmth while spinning to get away from the air vent and straight onto

….the floor of the bedroom. She blinked once, twice, a few times, her mind struggling to shake off the fog of the dream. Sitting up, she leaned back on her hands a moment, still disoriented, staring up at the bed where the sheets lay tangled and Klaus lay hidden, blankets tucked tight around his legs and pulled over his head all warm and snug and

“Damn it, Klaus!”

“Hmm.” His response wasn’t even a question, just an instinctive reply to the sound of her voice. He was still asleep. Asshole.

She stood up and found the edge of the blanket and pulled with the perfect combination of vamp strength and delicacy, unrolling the blanket in one smooth movement. Klaus flew into the side table, head knocking against a lamp before his reflexes caught and he pushed off the table to standing, his head swiveling every which way, hands poised to tear out the hearts of any threat. Seeing only Caroline, he relaxed a bit, but his voice was thick with sleep and an edge of worry.

“Caroline, what -”

“Blanket hog!” Caroline rasped before flinging herself bodily on the mattress, the comforter already wrapped around her. Klaus watched, amused, as she flipped sides a few times, her legs shifting as she struggled to get comfortable. A foot emerged for a moment, then pulled back as the chill of the night air hit. He swore that every few words of her exhausted slurring held some resemblance to the English language, but he couldn’t quite grasp the thread of her mumblings, so he just let his grin stretch wide as his gaze adored her.  

After a few minutes of what seemed to be an epic battle with the bedclothes, she sat up, hair a disheveled mess - his favorite look. “I’m awake and now it’ll take me forever to get back to sleep. This is the third time this week! Asshole! Get  your own covers!”

“I’m sorry, love.” He thought to employ the bashful puppydog look, decided to hold it in reserve for when she was more awake. He flashed away, returned with another blanket. “Here, look, I got my own.”

“But I want to sleep with you under the same covers!”

Klaus had to close his eyes and pause. It wasn’t that she was contradicting herself - that was just her exhaustion talking. No. It was that, to this day, a part of him remained in perpetual shock that she had chosen this life, had chosen him. The warmth in his chest was almost painful and he took a moment to savor it.

He dropped the blanket and slid underneath the sheets, brushing his lips at her temple before settling in and curling around her.  She bent her knees and scootched back, skin touching wherever it possibly could, letting a leg slide in between his and huffing a small, pleased noise as she found the perfect arrangement of limbs. His smile curved against the pillow and he brushed her hair back from her face, carding his fingers through the strands until he sensed she was asleep. Turning on his back, he reached over the side of the bed and pulled the extra blanket up and over before settling back at her side.

He didn’t trust himself not to steal the covers again.

ROCKSTAR FEATURE

Greetings to all you Rockstars out there! 

It is my pleasure to introduce to you all Destiny Davis… and goes to UC Davis to boot!

What is your field of study and thesis project?

Plant Biology. 

My project is focused on dissecting cell plate formation of plants through a chemical genomics approach. I’m pretty into cytokinesis in general.

What is your favorite blog post?

WHEN IM OVERZEALOUS WITH MY TIP BOX

WHEN I REALIZE ALL THAT I HAVE IS NEGATIVE DATA

WHEN A REVIEWER SAYS MY WORK IS NOT NOVEL ENOUGH FOR THEIR JOURNAL

What keeps you going when times get tough?

Beer keeps me going. I like beer. And sleep. And music. I like to keep things pretty simple outside the lab. I do make mosaics from time to time. And I write a lot.

Any advice to pass along?

Try to keep your hobbies. Sometimes I feel like grad school can make people a little one-faceted, what with the pressure to work all the time. So my advice is to not work all the time. Keep a hobby or two outside of science. Keeps things fresh and you interesting.


Anything else you want to include?

Friends make all the difference in grad school. College friends are forever and fun but grad school friends are your rock. They understand when others don’t and they make kick-ass drinking buddies.

WSWGCS, say hello to Destiny! You guys are everything, rock on.

Interested in being a part of the Feature? Hit us up on the via “Ask” to get involved!