i want to take off with them

anonymous asked:

What was it about Harry and Uma that made you want to ship them?

definitely watching their on screen interactions, particularly in their first scene together! there’s a familiarity born out of knowing each other for a long time in their interactions that made them dear to me from the get-go

and then adding onto that - Harry never seeming to be able to take his eyes off of Uma, his protective streak that’s a mile wide, her flirting back at him during ‘What’s My Name’, his pride and grin when she manages to get the upper hand in situations, Uma’s sharp yet intimate tone that she takes on when talking to Harry on the ship - these all kind of built up to why I ship Harry and Uma together. 

They’re largely on the same page, and her care for him is evident in the fighting sequence when she goes back for him without hesitation. And then there’s, of course, the infamous scene where Harry kneels and says her name with pretty much a mix of awe and admiration.

But mostly, what always gets to me about this ship is:

iconique™

SVT As Big Bros; Seungcheol !!

a/n: and im baaaaack to making seventeen things oh my god i need to make art but seventeen scenario writings sounds better

¸.•♥•.¸¸.•♥•.¸¸.•♥•.¸¸.•♥•.¸¸.•♥•.¸¸.•♥•.¸¸.•♥•.¸¸.•♥•.¸¸.•♥•.¸¸.•♥•.¸¸.•♥•.¸¸.•♥•.¸

-oh boy 

-here we go

-so

-seungcheol is your older bro

-by 5 years

-the first memory you had of seungcheol was when you two were out

-and you were out in your stroller

-you wanted to take your shoes off

-because FUCK shoes amirite

-so you tried to take your shoes off

-and you looked to seungcheol and just cried

-so what did seungcheol do?

-he took them off

-and threw them into a fountain

-they were adidas shoes too

-fuck

-but honestly same

-and that’s how your relationship was 

-you were the little little sister always

-you were the princess of the house

-ANNYEONG NANEUN URI JIBE PRINCESSSSSSSSSS

-so yeah

-your brother also treated like a princess too

-he didn’t let you walk to school by yourself

-you two were always walking together

-even when your mum was there too

-when you started middle school

-seungcheol was in high school

-and your friends would…

-just want to see him every time they came round

-”….he’s upstairs”

-but one thing you didn’t realise about your brother

-was that even though he’s good at basketball

-football (football. not american football. british football.)

-and baseball

-he’s also pretty good at singing too

-you remember slightly that he would sing to you when you couldn’t sleep

-and you would just fall asleep in his arms

-im not crying you are

-so one day he just told you up front that he got scouted by a company 

-and you’re like what you never sing in public???hoW

-he got scouted by a pledis rep 

-mhm

-good news! he got through and is now a trainee!!

-good day 

-well kind of

-he has to move to seoul

-shit

-you were gonna miss him

-:(

-but you were happy that he was doing something he liked 

-other than Taekwondo

-every time he came on the tv for an mv with the pledis boys you were so happy!!!

-but you were also….pretty confused….

-that on emv with the pledis boyz was played everywhere??

-but no one knew him until he was on SeventeenTV???

-weird

-but yeah 

-when he came round to being on SeventeenTV 

-people knew who he was!!

-and the day after the first stream

-your friends were freaking out 

-because they recognised who it was

-IT WAS YO BRO

-they were so happy too!!

-you were the happiest when it came round to his debut

-he did it!!!

-wow!!

-you and your parents planned a trip to stay every time they had a promotion in seoul

-that was a good plan

-the first time you met seventeen was pretty funny too 

-your brother got you backstage during promos for Mansae

-and you just saw seventeen stand up and look at you with the wildest smiles

-”guys this is y/n my sister”

-”nice to–”

-”touch her and i’l kill you”

-”jesus–”

-all the boy shifted back again

-fuck

-but after that you kind of felt like the group’s little sister

-like you were the little sister to EVERYONE

-and when i say everyone

-i mean everyone

-there was also that one time

-where you were invited to stay round at the dorm for the night–

-iNVitED TO thE DOrm WhAT iS tHSI?!?!???!?!??!?!??!?!?!??!?!!?!?!?

-what this is fiction stuff any fucking thing could happen 

-chill

-anyways you tried to fall asleep but you couldn’t 

-so you tried to find the room seungcheol was sleeping in

-you found it and came in 

-you saw his black hair that was slightly shining in the light from the outside

-and you just shook him

-”seungcheol…”

-he nodded but didn’t know ti was you he thought it was one of the boys

-but when you said this magic word

-”cheollie…….”

-he just shot up

-and looked to you

-”y/n??? what’s up??”

-”i can’t sleep….”

-”shit……come here…”

-and he just let you come under his cover so you could just sleep next to him

-aaaaWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

-bless up i love this sibling pair

-in the morning you were asleep and seungcheol was knocked out with his head leaning on your shoulder

-and it was just like the old times

-bLEss uP i LOve thIS sIBliNG pAIR


-”awwww look at y/n and seungcheol”

-”quickly get the camera”

-”take that photo and i will kill the two of you.”

-”shit—”

-”also seungkwan soonyoung don’t wake y/n she knows taekwondo”

-”so do i she can fight me–!”

-”is that a challenge soonyoung”

-”y/N YOU HEARd”

Ok so i took my back wheel and a new tire to this motorcycle shop because I need to get it changed. And this cute ass motorcycle boy comes over and offers to take the wheel and tire and carry them in for me. He was like acting all lowkey flirty and I was like freaking out because I didn’t want him to clock my T and as I handed him the wheel, the hub came off and crushed my toes and he laughed and I was like gjebfiwbcjwngiwnfjwnfjwnfiwj. I’m going in tomorrow and I’m gonna look a lot cuter. This time ill be prepared. With close toed shoes.

anonymous asked:

Dude be very careful talking about the Voltron fandom, they're more vicious than the SU fandom and they will attack anyone who they consider "problematic", up to and including members of the voice cast and staff of the production, and to the degree that the staff aren't allowed to talk about shipping for their own safety as decreed by the studio themselves. I don't want to see you caught in the fire -- and I'm posting this anonymously to protect myself, too. Please be careful, and take care.

Let them attack me. The amount of fucks I don’t give is real.

I don’t cave to death threats or hate. I never will.  
A group of disillusioned people aren’t going to get under my skin.

I was into Voltron before it took off, and I have my own ideas on pairings, but what that guy did isn’t worth fucking it up for the rest of us.
I just genuinely can’t believe people are that desperate for their ‘ships’ that they’d risk the show getting canceled. It’s like they’re addicted to meth, and their ships are the meth.

You get the show canceled that ship ain’t sailin’ ever. 

ignore the ugly ass banner (lovely dnp art by @sunshinehowelll [x])

so i just hit 500 followers?? how ? who ?? uhhthank you all so much for following this dumb blog - each and every one of you mean the world to me

to celebrate i’ve decided i’ll be creating url moodboards! for those of you who don’t know what that means, i literally just make a moodboard based off your url (pretty self explanatory)

want one? here’s what you have to do:
- mbf me
- send me an ask with your favorite music album
- reblog this post so this doesn’t fail horribly


i will be getting to all of them, but it may take some time (please be patient i’m sorry)

again, tysm for 500 followers ,, that’s unbelievable!!

if this flops it didn’t happen

“One day I was going to meet friends, and I had heels on, I thought, ‘I should take those off,’ but realized I want to wear them and we’re not together. There’s no one to look at me skeptically anymore. That moment came from real life, when that conversation happened, I thought, ‘This is so light and innocent and good. I want this.’ “
-Taylor Swift on the meaning of the song Begin Again.-

anonymous asked:

do you ever think the gangsey take spontaneous road trips? like it'll be slow day and they'll just pile into the Pig for an impromptu beach day or to go window shopping?

yes absolutely!! now that the search for glendower is over, they have to find other ways to satisfy the Adventurous/Meaning-Seeking parts inside of them, yknow, and i think that definitely manifests in spontaneous trips! 

i think probably henry is the one to initiate them at first, while everyone’s still reeling from the aftermath and the loss and the Trying To Find A New Normal—pulling gansey out of his quiet guilty moments, urging gansey to take him and go get the others and let’s find something to do with this day. but i think pretty soon, they all start to do it; adam confessing to ronan that he’s always wanted to see the beach and he has a night off so why not, or ronan showing up at 300 fox way at 3am like ‘wake up loser we’re all going to north carolina,’ or blue hearing about a museum or a landmark that she thinks gansey would like and deciding to surprise him with plans to go visit it… 

these kids all want to see and be and live, and with graduation on the horizon and knowledge that their paths will soon be diverging a little as they figure out their futures, of course they’re going to take the time they have to See Together and Be Together and Live Together. 

So… imma follow trashprince’s advice to me and rant on my page real quick because I’m a bit annoyed.

I hate that post about not being able to tell Soldier 76, Captain America, Joseph Christainsen, and now Cullen apart. I hate it so damn much. Like… I can tell them apart?? They all look fucking different?? That’s a young Soldier in the picture and I don’t understand why that post has so many fucking notes.

Well, I do understand. But I don’t DARE ever utter the real reason that post is taking off…

Just….wanted to ree for a second. I’ll probably delete this.

I take my own feelings and emotions for granted a lot, so i feel as if my feelings are as clear to others as they are for myself.

One of the things I really want to work on is actually expressing when I’m enjoying other people’s company. I assume that the fact that I go out of my way to be around certain people and talking to them should be obvious that I enjoy being around them (especially since I’m extremely closed off with 99% of people) Most can’t really read intentions and emotions that well, and god knows I need reassurance every once in a while, too. It would be good to provide that for others as well.

2.18 MALEC Prediction - Amendment

after the new sneak peak I would like to add the following to this post 

  1. So the scene that I took to be a make-up morning scene is clearly a flashback and I am DYING because Alec makes a joke. #WHAT… and the smiles are just everything and the scene clearly has another #MOMENT. They always cut the Malec sneak peaks just right to leave us happy, but wanting more. The scene is perfect. This episode better deliver like straight #gay up.
  2. I see a lot of people in the fandom questioning Magnus wearing rings to bed and I just… is that weird? I wear rings all the time. There are two rings that I never take off. Ever. (they both have personal meaning to me)… And I have others that I wear sometimes and ya, I sleep in them… I sleep with a necklace on every night… I always have… So like,  Magnus sleeping in his jewelry is not weird at all. Shut up about it you’re making me feel weird
  3. I’m wondering if the flashbacks happen randomly throughout the episode… like both Magnus and Alec are thinking about each other and we see HOW THEY FELL as the story unfolds … and then we all die. #i’malreadydiggingmygrave
  4. So apparently Clary and Jonathan are not twins… Jonathan is her older brother or something. Whatever it is, I’m 90% sure that parts of it don’t make sense in the show… because how does Clary have pure Angel blood if her mother left Valentine before he even knew she was pregnant, he never would of gotten the chance to experiment on her… and like 35 other things…  but I don’t really care because he knew he was her brother when he kissed her and that’s still gross.
  5. WHY CAN’T I JUST ENJOY MY BLOODY WEEKEND DAMMIT GIVE ME THE EPISODE NOW

ouat fandom never ceases to amaze me.

apparently now, once again, everyone thinks they absolutely know what is going to happen during the whole season and are already attacking Adam on Twitter over it. 

FYI JMO leaving doesn’t mean they will kill off Emma. JMO wanted to leave, how about respecting that instead of trolling Adam about it? Also, just because JMO won’t be in more than one episode (maybe more, depending on her schedule, who really knows—u can’t take them saying no seriously. these are the same people who insisted there would be no curses in the dark swan arc) doesn’t mean they are killing off CS.

Some CSers are acting nuts. You all need to take a chill pill…

Sometimes I think you all forget that visiting sets and cons doesn’t make you the person that suddenly knows EVERYTHING that is going to happen on the show… and no matter how many spoilers you post… or how many ‘rumors’ you hear—nothing is ever set in stone. So get your entitled asses off your soapbox, stop stamping your foot while throwing tantrums over no JMO (when it was HER choice to leave!), and stop making the rest of us sane CSers look bad.

anonymous asked:

What does it take to set Tim off and how often does he get into trouble

I guess it depends on your definition of trouble lml because yikes that’s his daily.

He gets arrested about once every three-six months, but misdemeanors. He’s only served like two/three times in his life as a juvenile.

Tim doesn’t usually throw the first punch. Disloyalty really sets him off as well as people talking about Curly or Angela if one of them is in trouble. People can say whatever they want about his family, he doesn’t care, but if someone criticizes Curly being away or a situation Angela’s recently gotten involved in, he’ll get pissed because he perceives that as people saying he’s not doing a great job helping to raise them.

He knows he’s not as good as Darry Curtis, but when someone forces him to realize that he gets very angry.

“Perhaps I am being too forward, I don’t know what your expectations are, the books I have read about Japan did not discuss such things, but, ah… you surely must know that I would very much like to kiss you.”

He hadn’t expected Victor to say something like that so soon, but it was the simplicity of the request that startled and charmed Yuuri all at once. Not a desire for them to go to bed together, or to become regular lovers; only a kiss. And he seemed so concerned that even that could offend Yuuri. It might have, if this were his first time among Westerners. But it was only a kiss. Yuuri had kissed plenty of men.

He didn’t respond, only reached up to take his glasses off, and then slid his fingers up from where they still rested against Victor’s shoulder to the back of his neck before he leaned across the distance between them and pressed their lips together.



I’m currently rereading @thetwoguineabook‘s Blackbird and AHHHHH I love this fic SO MUCH I wish I could draw every single scene in it *sobs*

This scene in Ch 2 is probably one of my favourite scenes in the entire fic. The way Victor tells Yuuri that he wants to kiss him - it gets me every time

my experience with the dads

Craig: Sweet storyline of getting reacquainted and being able to take things easy

Mat: Everytime he smiles my poor little gay heart stops. 

Brian: Makes you want to throw your character off a cliff to shut them up. Protect Daisy at all cost.

Robert: you deal with your inadequacies. I’ll be right here with you

Damien: Sweet and gentle. Also Naruto fanfiction and a MCR pun.

Hugo: He called a Kid a bitch once in a parking lot, it was awesome.

Joseph: I don’t know man, it’S a homeWreck

3

This is the order I feel this scene is going to go in.

Magnus is buttoned in the first gif; not sure about the second, and the last we clearly see Alec is making quick work of them in his effort to relieve the man of his clothing.

I don’t want to be spoiled this early, but also I REALLY want to see a longer teaser to this scene. A little lead-up to this moment, perhaps?

the-spockicorn  asked:

Hi, I’ve been considering starting a book in the fantasy genre. I really wanted to give some Native American representation in it, since it's something that I rarely see. However, this story wouldn't take place in America, it would be in a completely different world (though one loosely based off of earth in the 14 hundreds ish?) This is similar to your mixing cultures post, but I wanted to know: is there a good way to give Native American representation in stories that aren’t historical fiction?

Representing PoC in Fantasy When Their Country/Continent Doesn’t Exist

The core of this question is something we’ve gotten across a few different ethnicities, and it basically boils down to: “how can I let my readers know these people are from a certain place without calling them by this certain place?” Aka, how can I let people know somebody is Chinese if I can’t call them Chinese, or, in your case, some Native American nation without having a North America.

Notes on Language

As I have said multiple times, there is no such thing as “Native American culture”. It’s an umbrella term. Even if you are doing fantasy you need to pick a nation and/or confederacy.

Step One

How do you code somebody as European?

This sounds like a very silly question, but consider it seriously.

How do you?

They probably live in huts or castles; there are lords and kings and knights; they eat stew and bread and drumsticks; they celebrate the winter solstice as a major holiday/new year; women wear dresses while men wear pants; there are pubs and farms and lots of wheat; the weather is snowy in winter and warm in summer.

Now swap all those components out for whatever people you’re thinking about.

Iroquois? They live in longhouses; there is a confederacy and democracy and lots of warriors from multiple nations; they eat corn, beans, and squash (those three considered sacred and grown together), with fish and wild game; they wear mostly leather garments with furs in winter; there are nights by the fire and cities and the rituals will change by the nation (remember the Iroquois were a confederacy made up of five or six tribes, depending on period); the weather is again snowy in winter and warm in summer.

Chinese? They harvest rice; there is an emperor appointed by the gods and scholars everywhere; they use a lunar calendar and have a New Year in spring; their trade ships are huge and their resources are plenty; they live in wood structures with paper walls or mud brick; they use jade and ivory for talismans; their culture is hugely varied depending on the province; their weather is mostly tropical, with monsoons instead of snow on lowlands, but their mountains do get chilly.

You get the gist.

Break down what it is that makes a world read as European (let’s be honest, usually English and Germanic) to you, then swap out the parts with the appropriate places in another culture.

Step Two

Research, research, research. Google is your friend. Ask it the questions for “what did the Cree eat” and “how did Ottoman government work.” These are your basics. This is what you’ll use to figure out the building blocks of culture.

You’ll also want to research their climate. As I say in How To Blend Cultures, culture comes from climate. If you don’t have the climate, animals, plants, and weather down, it’ll ring false.

You can see more at So You Want To Save The World From Bad Representation.

Step Three

Start to build the humans and how they interact with others. How are the trade relations? What are the internal attitudes about the culture— how do they see outsiders? How do outsiders see them? Are there power imbalances? How about greed and desire to take over?

This is where you need to do even more research on how different groups interacted with others. Native American stories are oftentimes painful to read, and I would strongly suggest to not take a colonizer route for a fantasy novel.

This does, however, mean you might not be researching how Natives saw Europeans— you’ll be researching how they saw neighbours. 

You’ll also want to look up the social rules to get a sense for how they interacted with each other, just for character building purposes.

Step Four

Sensitivity readers everywhere! You’ll really want to get somebody from the nation to read over the story to make sure you’ve gotten things right— it’s probably preferable to get somebody when you’re still in the concept stage, because a lot of glaring errors can be missed and it’s best to catch them before you start writing them.

Making mistakes is 100% not a huge moral failing. Researching cultures without much information on them is hard. So long as you understand the corrections aren’t a reflection on your character, just chalk them up to ignorance (how often do most writers get basic medical, weapon, or animal knowledge wrong? Extremely often). 

Step Five

This is where you really get into the meat of creating people. You’ve built their culture and environment into your worldbuilding, so now you have the tools you need to create characters who feel like part of the culture.

You’ll really want to keep in mind that every culture has a variety of people. While your research will say people roughly behave in a certain way, people are people and break cultural rules all the time. Their background will influence what rules they break and how they relate to the world, but there will be no one person who follows every cultural rule down to the letter. 

Step Six

Write!

Step Seven

More sensitivity readers! See step 4 for notes.

Step Eight

Rewrite— and trust me, you will need to. Writing is rewriting.

Repeat steps seven and eight until story is done.

Extra Notes

I’ll be honest— you’re probably going to need a certain amount of either goodwill (if you’re lucky enough to make friends within the group you’re trying to represent— but seriously, please do not make friends with us for the sole purpose of using us as sensitivity readers. It’s not nice) and/or money to get to publishing level. 

The good part is the first three steps are free, and these first three steps are what will allow you to hurt others less when you approach. While you’ll still likely make mistakes, you’ll make a few less (and hopefully no glaring ones, but it can/does happen) so long as you do your due diligence in making sure you at least try to understand the basics.

And once you feel like you’ve understood the basics… dive down even deeper because chances are you’re about to reach a tipping point for realizing how little you know.

People will always find you did something wrong. You will never get culture 100% accurate— not even people who were born and raised in it will, because as I said in step five: cultures have a huge variety of people in them, so everyone will interact with it differently. But you can work your hardest to capture one experience, make it as accurate as possible, and learn more for next time.

~ Mod Lesya 

As much as i love the cult ending stuff, i also love the idea of Joseph actually being a real sweet guy.

None of the cult stuff, he’s a regular dad with a failing marriage and a lot of stress and all he wants is to escape life and go to the Bahamas and sail his boat and drink fruity alcohol, the guy is probably having a mid-life crisis, tbh.

His wife flirts with other men, is an alcoholic, snaps at him. He’s not much better than her, he snaps as well and pursues a romance with the New Dad On The Block, but neither of them want eachother anymore, and its written to be very blatantly obvious that they are both terrible for eachother.

I want to imagine a good ending where Mary and Joseph do split, on good terms. Where Amanda’s gone off to college and Joseph stays with you in your house. Where he gets partial custody of his kids and they visit on weekends and holidays and during the week whenever. Where you give the twins more fodder for their creepy charade and chris opens up to you, and you finally get to meet his toddler, crish.

Joseph takes you out on his boat and you have margaritas on the deck together and he teaches you about rigging the sails. He kisses you a lot and he casually puts an arm around your waist and he smiles and you know its a real smile not just a facade.

He’s still the Cool Youth Pastor, and you help him with the dances and the bake sales. Sometimes you sit in when he’s doing bible study with the kids, you help pass out snacks, you help him coordinate vacation bible school in the summer. In the evenings he sits in the living room on a recliner and reads the good book, with his reading glasses sliding down his nose.

And once every now and then you both scrape up enough money for a real vacation to the keys or the caribbean or wherever. You go to the real Margaritaville and live on island time for a week or so. You stay in a cute hut on the water like in the sandals commercials, walk on the beach, have a romantic dinner, and he takes you back to your suite and you both have a slow romantic evening in bed.

You can tell he’s happy being with you, and even after years he still makes your heart skip a beat.

Local Dad Orders a Burger at The Coffee Spoon

(Based on the video: Local dude orders a burger at Starbucks)

Mat: Can I help the next guest please?

Mat: Ah hello sir, welcome to the Coffee Spoon, what can I get for you?

Robert, heavily distorted: Yeah, can I get a motherfuggin’ uhhhhh-hhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Craig and Joseph: *giggling in the background*

Robert, still going strong: hhhhhhhhhhhh, burger?

Craig, Joseph and Brian: *breaks down laughing*

Mat: Sir, we don’t sell burgers here.

Robert, distorted: What do you mean you don’t se- *cuts off*

MC, Craig, Joseph, Brian and Damien: *laughing in unison*

Mat: We sell, we sell paninis and breakfast sandwiches-

Brian: OH MY CARDIAC ARREST.

Mat: -and coffee.

Robert, distorted: You think I know what a panini is!? *white noise*

MC, Craig, Joseph, Brian and Damien: *wheezing in laughter*

Robert, distorted: Just give me a burger! Extra cheese! *more white noise*

Mat: No!

Craig, Joseph and Damien: *giggling now*

Mat: We don’t have burger extra cheese! We have paninis-

Robert, distorted: You don’t understand-

Mat: No!

Robert, distorted: I need this. *white noise*

Mat: Sir!

MC, Craig, Joseph, Brian and Damien: *still giggling*

Mat: I’m gonna have to ask you-

MC, Craig, Joseph, Brian and Damien: *giggling so hard it overpowers Mat*

*Hugo walks in*

Robert, distorted: Why are you suppressing food from the public!? *white noise*

Craig, Joseph, Brian and Damien: *still giggling so much that nothing can be heard*

Hugo: What in the hell did I walk in to?

Joseph: I’M CRYING-

Mat: Do you want coffee? Tea?

Craig, Brian and Damien: *cacophony of giggles*

Joseph: I’m crying…

Hugo: What happened?! Hold on, hold on…

Mat: Can I get you a caramel macchiato?

Robert, distorted: Yeah, I’ll have a burger, extra dip. *white noise*

Mat: We don’t have-

Hugo: Oh my GOD, the voice changer?! Really?!

Craig: I’ll have two number nines, a number nine large…

Joseph: I’m crying, oh my god…

Mat: Sir, this is the Coffee Spoon, not a McFridayz…

Robert, distorted: Please, they’ll take my wife if I don’t give them the burg- *cuts off, white noise*

Craig, Joseph, Brian and Damien: *laughing again*

Mat: Sir! You’re at the wrong store!

Mat, sounding exasperated: You want a McFridayz, not the…

Damien: Why are you buying clothes at the soup store!

Robert, distorted: Hello? *white noise*

Craig, Joseph, Brian and Damien: *burst out laughing again*

Mat: Hello??

Robert, distorted: I would like a burger. *white noise*

Mat: No!

MC, Craig, Joseph, Brian and Damien: *a mixture of laughs and wheezes*

Hugo: Oh my goooooood…

Mat: We sell, we sell coffee, and, and confectioneries here, Jesus Christ…

Hugo: Geez…

Mat: Boss, agdaj, I need to get the Manager…

Craig: Bro, how much of that did you get?

Joseph, Brian and Damien: *quiet giggles*

Robert, now echoing: COMPOUND!

Hugo: Eugh…

Joseph: What?!

MC, Craig and Damien: *wheezing*

Mat: Sir, do you want to-Sir, do you want to speak to the Manager?

Joseph: He’s ordering from the ether…

Mat: He’s ordering a burger-

Robert, distorted again: Can I get a fucking uhhh-

Mat: No…

MC: Oh my god…

Mat: He’s ordering, he’s trying to order a burger with extra dip at the Coffee Spoon…

Hoe when you're not a hoe

So, there’s a lot y'all don’t know about me. Some things you’re just never gonna no. But let me let you in on this: I am shy as hell, awkward, and this is a post on how to hoe when you’re not a hoe.

Maybe you wanna experiment? Maybe you wanna be a hoe? Maybe you’re ready to hoe but too shy? Maybe you wanna look like a bad bitch? Or maybe you’re a hoe but you’re not but you are but you’re not- either way. I gotchu.

Confidence is key

Of course, the first one I add is on confidence you think. No, but seriously, confidence.

  •  If you don’t have conidence, fake it till you make it. If you pretend like you’re a bad bitch, you will eventually be a bad bitch.
  • Change your walk. yes, your walk. There’s a walk that will not only make you look like a bad bitch, but will make you feel like a bad bitch. Shoulders back, head high (? straight basically) and let your boobs lead the way. You want your arms swinging by your side casually and your hips doing it too, make it look casual. So don’t overdo it.
  • Tell yourself how much you love you every day.
  • Wear clothes that make you feel sexy. For me it’s a variety of things, but put me in skinny jeans, a tank top, adidas and let me put on some highlighter && I’ll be ready for anything.
  • Work  on yourself. Improve constantly. Instead of just being upset about your flaws, write them down and figure outhow to solve them. 

Ways to hoe

This all depends and such, but here you go. You may wanna be a sneaky hoe, a cute hoe, a obvious hoe. It doesn’t matter, these should help in some way.  So you can get that ish.

  • Learn the art of seduction. Seducing is a skill. If you want to seduce someone you should learn it. You can find tons of things online, everywhere. There’s sites with ways to seduce, give blow jobs, eat girls out…etc. Learn. Practice your expressions with random people (not forcing them into anything sexually, yall, just lots of eye contact…etc)  but do it in a way that you seem innocent. Gauge their reactions.
  • Sexting. Alright, this is for those that want to feel good sexually. This is for the one’s that are too shy to do anything up close and personal, but want to hoe. Or anyone, tbh. Sexting is a very common thing. If you want to sext, do your research. Don’t show your face…etc. You can always fake your confidence with sexting.
  • Hoeing that isn’t exactly hoeing. Maybe you like the aesthetic but don’t want dick. Maybe you want to wear racy things and flirt, but not fuck. I gotchu. Your goal is to wear something sexy. I mean sexy. Buy lingerie and wear it every chance you get. Mini skirts are your best friend. Flrit with body language, not just words.
  • Be your best. Be confident. If you want to wear makeup, do it. Girl ya highlighter is poppin.
  • Clubs & parties. Do I need to explain this one? Fuck who you want, boo!
  • The other options, are different. I won’t “recommend” them but I also won’t tell you not to do them. I’m not recommending them because of the struggle…etc. I’ve seen off of just this site alone. You could be an escort, a sugar baby, a stripper, a cam girl…etc But if you even consider this shit. Do your fucking research. Be of a legal age. Know what you’re doing before you go into it. And if you do go into it, have fun, baby.

DON’T. TAKE. SHIT.

I mean that. Don’t let ANYONE put you down for what you wear, do, or want to do. You do you. You wear what you want, do what you want, and take what you want. If they try to pull some bullshit, show them that you are a queen.

To look like a bad bitch:

Wear what makes you confident. But here’s some things I’ve just noticed as I see a lot of them or something.  In general:

  • Get your eyebrows done
  • Make sure your eyeliner & shadow is matching 
  • Highliiigghhhttt, highlight, highlight more highlight yes
  • Matte lips are common
  • So are glossy lips though
  • SPARKLE, GLITTER, YES
  • Chic/baddie/badass clothes
  • Coconut oil ur hair
  • Look at all the clear skin posts yall
  • Shave your legs
  • Smell good
  • Thigh high boot/heels are p common
  • Bbodycon happens a bit
  • But tbh wear what you wanna weat && love yourself

Please remember to be safe doing any of the things. Watch out for allergies when you read hoe tip posts, don’t follow everything you see, carry a self defense weapon, learn some self defense. Get it, boo.