i want to sob into my hands for a while

anonymous asked:

Are you taking blurb/one shot requests?? I have one 🙂 Harry & his girl talking about him doing the Victoria’s Secret show and her becoming insecure about her body compared to the models bodies.

“And yeah so I said yes for the show!!” Harry chirped sitting in front of you as he blabbered about his performance that he agreed for the VS’s show in Shanghai. You knew how much he adored his work of making music and presenting it in front of everyone. He loved creating his own style and flaunting it to others. And you too respected his work that he worshiped and never tried to interfere in it, you did put your opinion when he asked but never stopped-held him back from performing.

But this time, this time you wanted to stop him from going to Shanghai. You didn’t wanted him to go out there and perform in between those have naked models who had perfect body. You wanted to have your man by yourself and not in the crowd of those gorgeous angels. You feared that his heart might slip and…maybe leave you?

“Isn’t it exciting???” Harry asked standing up and held his phone oyt that was ringing, probably Harry Lambert was on the phone to discuss with him about his outfit and stuff.

You smiled a little forcefully and nodded your head. Harry returned the smile and walked out in the garden to take the call before placing a warm kiss to your forehead.

You never thought that such a sweet gesture of him would send you off tears as you started imagining the worst that could happen. What if Harry falls for someone else over there? What if he has a one night stand? What if he leaves you? You would never get to feel his kisses again, touches again, love again if any of that happens. All of this horrible thoughts made your eyes pool with tears as you rushed to the kitchen to get yourself a glass of water.

Soft sobs escaped past your lips and you put a hand on your mouth to muffle your cries. Those ladies out there were very much beautiful and carved perfectly. Any man could feel his heart race up seeing such pretty women and Harry too was a man and who knows he too might get a second thought over there.

You closed your eyes trying to push the dark visions of your Harry with someone else but quickly re-opened them again when heard his raspy voice from behind you.

“Petal are you crying?”

“What?no peaches” you held a breath
And wiped your tears with the back of your hand and patted your cheeks softly trying to get rid of wetness. Before you could turn around yourself, you felf two pair of arms turning you around and now you were facing him.

“Why’re you crying?”

“I am n-”

“The truth” harry said sternly. You knew there was no way to turn your back to him now and he wasn’t from the one who gave in too easily. So you decided to pour your heart to him.

“Dont go please? Th-there are gonna be all perfect ladies and I-i don’t wanna lose you and I just am nothing compared to them. Why would you even want to be with me after coming from there” you shake your head sobbing. You fiddled with your hands while warm tears dripped on your skin.


“Oh my baby.” Harry said bringing you to his and kisses your forehead before resting his chin on top of your heart and swayed you both sideways.


“My baby, m'love I would never ever leave you. You are my world sweetheart. I might have learned everything but I haven’t learned how to live without you and I dont even wanna know that. And about em ladies, you’re the only woman whom I have my eyes on. You’re perfect just the way you are wouldn’t wanna have you any other way, you’re my petal and I’m your peaches forever” harry said and pulled away to have a view of your face that was probably red because of crying.

“I love you” he whispered amd brought his lips down to meet yours in a kiss. He kissed you with such tenderness and love like he was assuring you that you have him for eternity.

“I love you too” you said after you both pulled away to breath. A sheepish smile covering your face as you snuggled yourseld to his chest.

“Now would you like to join me missus?”

What I want Daddy to do to me

I want him to push me up against the wall, my cheekbones and breasts pressed into said wall painfully from the force of his body. I want him to grab a fistful of my hair and yank my head to the side and expose the soft flesh where my shoulder meets my neck and I want him to sink his teeth into my flesh with such force that he draws blood and the imprint is left there for days.

I want him to spit into his hand and stroke the tight little hole no one has ever touched before, using his saliva to make fucking my ass easier for him. I want him to start pushing his cock in with no warning, and to meet any act of resistance from me with roughness, sharp words, name calling, things that tell me my full and complete surrender to whatever he wants to do to me is my only option. I want him to remind me of the advantage his size gives him, that he’s both bigger and stronger than me and can make me do whatever he wants and make me fully awareI have no say in what he does to me.

I want him to call me a little slut when he buries the full length of his cock in my ass, and to laugh at whatever cries of pain that come from me when he starts to fuck me. I want him to yank my hair so hard while he does this that tears come to my eyes. If I cry out that he’s hurting me, I want him to say “good” and do whatever he’s doing to me harder, more roughly. I want him to use the hand that isn’t tangled in my hair and wrap it around my neck, squeezing so tightly I can’t breathe, ignoring any plea for him to stop. I want him to choke me until I’m on the verge of blacking out, and then I want him to suddenly let go.

I don’t want him to wait for me to be able to breathe again. I want him to force me down onto my knees as soon as he releases my neck, and I want him to ram his cock into the back of my throat. I know I won’t be able to take the whole thing, not even close. I know I’ll choke, I know I’ll gag, I know I’ll inevitably throw up. And every time I do, I want him to slap me and tell me I need to learn to take all of him, and slap me again each time I choke. I want him to keep fucking my throat as hard as he can, both hands in my hair, holding my head captive to whatever he wants to do to my mouth, I want him to command me to look at him so he can see the tears in my eyes. I want him to call me a dirty little whore and mock me for not being able to take the entirety of his cock, and for him to spit on me in disgust at my inability.

I want him to pull me up and tell me because I can’t take it, he has to finish some other way. And I want him to push me back up against the wall, drive his cock back into my ass, hard, and laugh when I start to sob at how much pain it causes me. I want him to fuck me as hard as he can, one hand on my throat and the other holding my hip to steady my body so he can fuck my hole while he calls me dirty names and tells me he owns me and all I am is something for him to use as he pleases, until he finishes in my ass. And after, I want him to grab my hair, yank my head around and force me to look him in the eyes. I want him to ask me, “What do you say?”

I’ll tell him, “Thank you, Daddy.” in a voice made hoarse by pain and tears.

And after I tell him that I want him to lean in and whisper, “That’s my good girl.” in my ear.

Badass- Imagine

Fandom: Stranger Things

Pairing: Steve Harrington x Reader

Warning: sexual assault, fluff

Word Count: 1728

Summary: Billy threatens the reader and Steve finds out and wants to protect them.

A/N: This is my first Steve Harrington imagine, let me know if you want a second part of this one or any more.

“I’ll pick you up in a couple of hours okay, babe?” Steve whispered in your ear with his arm wrapped tightly around you. You nod and press a quick kiss to his cheek. You start to pull away when he grabs your hand and smashed his lips to yours. You redden and quickly pull away, embarrassed by all the other people around you that could have seen.

Your relationship wasn’t a secret, you were just not a huge fan of PDA. He chuckled at how shy you were and squeezed you to his chest. “Jonathon is gonna be with you, right?” he asked, concern showing in his eyes.

“Yes, Steve, he’ll be there the whole time, I don’t understand why you’re so paranoid, it’s school after hours, no one is gonna be there.”

“I know (Y/N), I just worry about you, what if something happened to you and I wasn’t there?”

“You’re being silly.” You giggle and look around quickly before pecking his lips and turning toward the dark room where you and your best friend, Jonathon Byers, will be developing some photos.

You stood there comparing who’s photos turned out better for the better part of two hours. So far, you were winning and Jonathon was not happy about it. “I think I have some more in my car that will bring me smirking across the finish line.” You laughed and snorted, “Okay, Byers you’re on.” He grabbed his keys and left the room, mumbling something about you going down under his breath.

You turned back to your photos and swished them around for a couple more moments. Then you heard the door opening and you began laughing. “Wow, okay Byers, someone is eager to win.” You turn around and gasp when you see that it was not Jonathon who opened the door, but Billy Hargrove, the scary new guy at school.

Billy stepped toward you, “Win? The only thing I wanna win is the school, King Steve needs to be taken down a few notches and what better way than to ruin his girl.” You shrank back, only to hit the cabinet. “Steve is on his way, you should leave before this ends badly for you!” you snarl with all the anger you can muster underneath your fear.

Billy only laughs and continues to advance towards you. “No one except for that freak Byers boy is coming and his car is across the lot, which means that we have plenty of time to chat in here.” He has you cornered and grabs your wrists in his one hand. You squirm and attempt to pull away but he readjusted his grip on your wrists and it becomes impossible. With his free hand, he tangled his fingers in your hair and yanks you closer. “Billy, let go of me! Let go!” you screamed. Billy silences you by sloppily kissing you. You are able to yank one of your arms free in his distraction and slap him across the face. He pulls back and recaptures your wrist in his hand and grips your hip with his free hand tightly.

“You better shut up, you little bitch. If you don’t I’ll kick this shit out of your pretty boy Harrington.” His hot breath wafts in your face and you shrink away nodding, a single tear falling down your cheek. He pushes your hair to the side and attaches his lips to your neck, sucking harshly causing you to whimper your discomfort. His hand on your hip continues to dig into you and you are almost positive they will bruise. As much as you wanted to, you refused to beg him, you will not give him that satisfaction. Before you know it, Billy’s face waves in front of you and he whispers, “See you tomorrow, same time?” before pecking your cheek and disappearing from the room. You sink to the ground your arms clutching your knees tightly to your chest.

Jonathon found you like that, frozen staring off into space with tears slowly making their way down your cheeks. He immediately fell to his knees and lifted your chin. His eyes went to your neck and then he stood up, “Did Steve…did he do this to you?” His fists started clenching and unclenching.

More tears poured out as you shook your head, “No, it was Billy, he said he wanted to take down ‘King Steve’ and he kissed me and threatened that if I told Steve he would hurt him.” Jonathon held out his hand and helped you to your feet, “Let’s go get cleaned up, okay?” he said gently. You leaned into him as he led to you the nearest bathroom and lifted you onto the counter and started to wipe away your tear stains.

“You have to tell him, (Y/N). He’s going to find out anyway,” Jonathon whispered.

“No, and I forbid you to tell him, I am not gonna be one of those girls who goes crying to their boyfriend at the drop of a hat. I can handle Billy.”

“This is not the drop of a hat! He is harassing you! Billy hurt you!” Jonathon nearly shouted.

“This is not your problem, let me deal with this, without Steve!” You stomped out of the bathroom and nearly ran into Steve.

“Hey babe, there you are, I went by the dark room and no one was there.” You smiled half-heartedly and pulled at your collar and your hair to hide the mark Billy had branded on your skin. He didn’t notice and pulled you back toward the dark room to collect your stuff.

ΦΦΦ

As soon as Steve’s car pulled up outside your house, you gather your bag and open the door. “Hey,” he reaches out and touches your knee, which causes you to flinch and pull away. “Are you okay?” his face laced with concern once again. “Yeah, I’m fine, you just startled me is all.” He breaks out into a huge smile and he presses a kiss to your cheek. “See you tomorrow, I love you.” This causes you to smile despite your nerves and nod. “I love you too, Steve.” You get out of the car and turn as he speeds away.

ΦΦΦ

You lay awake looking over your notes for one of your toughest classes when you hear a knock against your window. You jump and tiptoe to your window and pull back the curtains to reveal Steve leaning against your window. “Let me in or I’ll freeze.” You open the window and he pulls himself in and purposefully oversteps so he comes crashing down on top of you. You shriek and fall back on your bed and pull him down on top of you.

“I missed you,” he whispered and nuzzled his face into your neck. Realization dawns on you and you sit up quickly and reach to turn out the lights, hiding your bruise from view. Steve pulls back at this, and asks again for the second time that day, “Are you alright?”

“Oh yeah, I’m fine,” you say quickly, “I just don’t want my parents coming up here and seeing you, then we’d both be in trouble.”

“Well since we’re alone in the dark, come here you.” He snakes his arm around your waist and pulls you closer. Steve’s fingers touch the marks Billy left on your hip and you suck in air through your clenched teeth. “Did I hurt you?” he gasps and reaches out to turn on the light. You roll away quickly, “No, I’m fine.” but not quick enough before he sees the darkened skin on your torso.

“Who did this to you? Did I do this? Today? When I hugged you?” He immediately starts to tear up, “I never meant…you know I would never hurt you on purpose…how could I do this?” He sits up and rakes his hands through his beautifully styled hair.

“Steve it wasn’t you, I swear.” You say, tears brimming.

“Then who?” he demanded, his fists clenching, just like Jonathon’s. You drew back away from him leaning against the headboard.

“Steve, you’re scaring me.” you whispered. His face softened and he slid across your bed and reached his hand out. You didn’t hesitate to take it.

“Please, (Y/N), baby, tell me who did it.” he whispered. You sighed as more tears fell down.

“Today while me and Jonathon were in the dark room, he left to go get more photos from his car and…that new kid…Billy came in and he wouldn’t let me leave…” you sobbed, hiding your face, “he grabbed my wrists and told me he wanted to dethrone you, and he wanted to ‘ruin me’ and then he…he kissed me.” Steve reached out again and gently pulled your hands away from your face.

“Let me see, it’s okay, I’m not mad anymore, you know I would never hurt you.” he speaks softly to you. You nod and allow him roll up your sleeves and examine the finger shaped marks on your wrists. He kisses them softly in between his murmurings, comforting you. He continues to gently pull on your hand until you lean into him. You bury your head in his chest, sobbing.

“I’m sorry, so sorry,” you cry, “I tried to stop him, but he wouldn’t listen to me.”

“Shh, baby,” he stroked your hair, “I’m here, it’s okay.”

“ When he kissed me, I managed to break free and slap him-”

“Whoa, whoa, wait babe, you slapped Billy Hargrove? The new kid? Oh my god, I’m dating a badass. They’ll be calling you royalty now.” He shook his head in disbelief, staring at you with such admiration.

You sniffled and looked up at him, “You think so?”

He wiped your tears away and kissed your nose, then both your cheeks, then your mouth. “I know so.”

He swept your hair to the side and glared at the hickey standing out of your neck. You quickly laced your fingers through his and moved your hair to hide it. You pushed him down and and curled up next to Steve. You laid down and he squeezed you tightly, careful to avoid your injury.

“I’m so lucky to have you,” he whispers and kisses your forehead.

“I love you too, Steve.” you smile in the dark and fall asleep, feeling safe in his arms.


Hey guys hope you like this, it’s kinda different!

-flawlessara

Stay Away | Zach Dempsey x Reader (ft. Monty Dela Cruz)

Genre: Angst, Romance
POV: Reader’s/First Person
Warning: Containg swearing, violence and sexual harrasment!!

A/N: This was personally hard for me to write, but it was requested. It’s a bit heavy and it’s not the usual fluffy write-up you guys often get from me. Nonetheless, I will be posting a new fluff piece tomorrow, so stay tuned! Meanwhile, I hope you guys like this for now.

Request: Hai, I was wondering if you could do an imagine where Zach and his girlfriend (the reader) are hanging out and he despite her trying to hide them he sees a bunch of bruises on her and gets really worried and mad asking her what happened only for her to tell him that Montgomery had beat her up in a drunken state because she refused to sleep with him. This causes Zach to get mad and go beat him up and threatening him to never go near the reader again.

—–

Zach and I were watching TV when he suddenly said he was hungry. I pout at him and sigh as a response as I got up from the sofa and make my way to the kitchen to quickly cook something up. Zach was feeling a bit hungover after yesterday and he loved being treated like a baby whenever he was sick. I took out 2 bowls of instant ramen to satisfy his hunger.

I held onto the sleeves of my sweater while leaning on the kitchen counter as I waited for the water to boil. The incident from Jessica’s party last night replayed in my mind once again. Zach would flip if he knew and I didn’t want to ruin Zach and Monty’s friendship. Besides, Monty was just drunk, I think to myself, he was just intoxicated and didn’t know what he was doing. But it still wasn’t an excuse, I continue to think. The incident scared me, Monty, scared me.

Keep reading

BTS reacting to you leaving after a fight.

Kim Namjoon:
He watched you pack your bags with shaking eyes and not said anything to you, too scared of the consequences. When you walked past him with tears streaming down your reddened cheeks, something inside of him died a little by the realization of what your argument has caused.

He ran after you out the house and grabbed you by your hand, turning you around to him. “Where are you going?” He asked with a trembling voice, feeling his eyes well up. “I never meant for this to go as far as it did. Don’t leave before we’ve talked this out.” He pulled you into him and wrapped his arms tightly around your body, too scared that you might run away if he let go.

Kim Seokjin:
He nervously paced up and down the empty apartment, the silence almost driving him insane. He dialed your number constantly, his heart dropping a little further whenever it goes straight to voice mail. 
He dropped down on the bed, throwing the lamp off the bedside table in frustration as thunder rolled in from the east. 

He felt terrible for letting you go that easily and a lonely tear rolling down his cheek gave away the pain he felt inside. Suddenly he heard the front door slam shut and rushed back into the kitchen to find you standing in drenched clothes, your eyes bloodshot from crying. He didn’t give it a second thought and run over to you, holding your body close to his. “This shouldn’t have happened Y/N. I was worried sick. Please don’t ever leave me again.”

Min Yoongi:
He let you go at first, thinking that you’d come back after letting out what you didn’t want him to see. After a while, he started to become anxious about his decision of letting you go without telling him where you’re heading. He tried to call you but the minute it went to voice mail, he grabbed his jacket from the back of the chair and ran out the shared apartment, slamming the door shut behind him. 

He ran down the empty street, rain hitting the ground with force and soaking his clothes entirely. When he wanted to give up, he noticed a lonely silhouette sitting on the bench across from the coffee shop he took you for your first date, her hair drenched in rain. He let out a sigh in relief and ran over to you, putting his jacket around your shoulders before kneeling down in front of you. “Honestly if we ever decide to fight again, let’s agree not to run away during storms again.”

Jung Hoseok:
His jaw dropped the minute he noticed you packing your suitcase with tears streaming down your now pale cheeks. He gulped, nervous to ask you the question he held back for so long. “Where are you going?” He mumbled, feeling the familiar knot in his stomach tightening. “We need a break.” You answered, your voice cracking. 

As you walked past, Hoseok got ahold of your arm and pulled you back towards him, his gaze meeting yours. “You can’t just run away and pretend that it’ll be okay eventually. If you leave now, I don’t think we’ll ever find a solution to any of our problems and this love is going to waste.”

Kim Taehyung:
He slammed down his hand on the door in front of you, causing it to fall shut again. You jumped slightly and felt his heavy breathing against your neck. You turned around to notice him standing behind you, his lips trembling. A smile tugged on his lips as his eyes met yours. “If you’re really doing this, at least tell me where you’re going.” He said with a threatening tone, inching closer until his lips were only a hairs-breadth away from yours. 

“Tell me that where you’re going you’ll be safe and that I don’t have to lose sleep worrying about you even if this was in the end, your decision. Tell me that I won’t have to drive hours on time just to find you stranded on the side of the road like a wild animal?”

Park Jimin:
He chase after you, screaming your name at the top of his lungs but you didn’t bare to stop, you wanted to flee from him for a while. You dragged the suitcase behind you, sobbing violently as you thought about what has removed this final thread that caused you to leave. 

You stopped dead in your step when a hand grabbed your shoulder and spun you around. Jimin’s eyes locked with yours, he didn’t dare to look away. A single tear rolled down his cheek, his eyes glistening with frustration. “Is it that easy to you? Am I that easy to you? Do you think that I’ll just apologize for saying what’s on my mind because you’re threatening to run away? Because if that’s the case, you’re right…” His voice cracked, another tear rolled down his cheek, followed by another one and another one. “Stay with me until the end of time, princess.”

Jeon Jungkook:
He watched the door fall shut, his breath becoming short as reality hit him. You really left. He heard the engine starting and watched the car pull out of the driveway. He slid against the door and ran his hand through his hair, letting out a loud sigh.  A single tear slid down from his warm, butterscotch eyes, followed by another one, and another one, until soon, a steady stream of salty tears flowed it’s way down his pale cheek, releasing the sadness and sorrow that has been held inside of him for all this time but still he did not make a sound.

He waited a little longer, pacing down the apartment for hours on time, nervously holding onto his phone, anxiously waiting for a sign from you. Anger raised inside of him by the thought that he has caused you to put yourself under such danger. Suddenly, a burst of anger rushed through his body and he threw his phone against the wall, watching it break into pieces. He screamed out loudly, not wanting to accept reality. “This can’t be. No. Why did she leave so easily? Why did I not stop her?”

Jerome Valeska Imagine - You’re Scared Of Him

Originally posted by smooshywrites

Originally posted by teenagecrush

WARNING!!! Mentioning alcohol problems and self harming!!!

Your P.O.V.

The ginger boy in front of me was absolutely terrifying but at the same time, I felt happy. I adored him but I had never been so nervous and scared before. Yet here I was, with the clown prince of crime himself without being tied down and threatened with my life.

Jerome Valeska had been my best friend through out my childhood and to my teens. We were both 18 now, him being a few months older than me. Just a year ago I admitted that I liked him more than just friends and his feelings were mutual. We started to kiss each other and it developed into heated makeout sessions and then sex. We were together and I supported him. His mother was absolutely horrible but I didn’t expect Jerome to murder her.

The past few months had been the wildest and most emotional in my entire life. Jerome went to Arkham Asylum. It broke my heart and I was devastated. Once he joined the maniax, I was getting really scared. I thought I had lost his good side forever. The worst part was when I thought I had lost him forever. He died. My boyfriend, my bestfriend and soulmate had died. 

I was all alone. The sadness and misery were too much for me so I drowned my feelings with a bottle. One bottle became two and it kept going. As I was in the middle of a cloud of misery, he came back. It was mindblowing. But at the same time I was happy. Jerome tried to make the entire city go mad. He lost his face and fought with Bruce Wayne. He was supposed to go back to Arkham, but Indian Hill took him. Jerome, being the badass he was, broke out and now he was here, with me.

He had scars around his face and his lips were curved into a smile. He was wearing a black shirt and jeans. He came with clothes filled with holes, but I had some of his old clothes here. So, he wore them. 

‘‘You still look stunning’‘ He broke the silence that had been bothering us. I was shocked and more or less speechless. ‘‘How are you not dead?’‘ I dared to ask him. All my muscles were tense and I felt how my hands were trembling. I didn’t want to be so scared because I still loved him. Damn, I would do anything for him but I was afraid that he would kill me.

‘‘Death doesn’t seem to like me too much’‘ He laughed and then took a sip of the fresh coffee I had made before he barged through my window. Jerome came to my apartment without any warnings and I nearly stabbed him. I smiled a bit at his comment but I didn’t know how to relax. 

‘‘Did ya miss me too much kitten?’‘ He asked me, standing up and then taking a seat right next to me on my black couch. I gulped and grabbed my cup, hoping that the coffee would help my nerves. I could literally hear my heartbeat. It kept beating, beating, beating, b e a t i n g….

‘‘Y/N’‘ Jerome snapped me out of my thoughts. I flinched and spilled some coffee on my lap. I winced in pain and quickly put the cup away. Jerome wiped the coffee off my thigh with his hand, making my breath hitch in my throat. His touch made goosebumps rise on my soft skin. His eyes looked straight into mine and that’s when I felt like losing myself. I tried to hold back my tears so he wouldn’t get angry, but it felt nearly impossible.

‘‘Why are you crying? Did someone hurt you?’‘ He growled as he saw the tears in the corners of my E/C eyes. I shook my head no but it didn’t convince him. Jerome clenched his jaw and seemed mad. It scared me so I his my face in my hands and tried to calm down. Although Jerome had killed people, even his own mother, it seemed like he still cared.

He pulled me into his strong arms and hugged me tightly. I could feel that he had gotten stronger. First, I held my breath, too scared to breathe as he held me. Then he rubbed my back gently, up and down which made me relax. ‘’Breathe kitten. It’s just me, Jerome. Everything’s alright’’ He tried to assure me. I inhaled a shaky breath and felt warm tears soaking his shirt. It was still him, the same person I had known since forever. But it felt different.

‘‘I missed you s-so much’‘ I sobbed and then clenched onto him. Finally, I allowed my other emotions to conquer my fear. ‘‘Yeah, it sucked that I couldn’t visit you in so long’‘ He admitted while rubbing my back. I bit my bottom lip and tasted the irony taste of blood. ‘‘But things will change. We can be together now’‘ He added a bit more happily. I met his pretty eyes and saw that he didn’t look bloodthirsty at all. He seemed genuinely glad to see me.

‘‘So..you won’t..’‘ I tried to speak but the words got stuck in my throat. ‘‘I won’t what? You gotta finish what you started doll face’‘ He tried to make me speak. I nodded and looked away. He hummed something and grabbed my jaw, making me face him again. ‘‘Tell me’‘ He whispered and looked serious. I just hoped he wouldn’t get mad at me. ‘‘You won’t k-kill me, right?’‘ I asked him with a voice, barely louder than a whisper. Something twisted in his eyes and he let go of my jaw.

‘‘Why would you even think that?’‘ He growled a bit angrily, startling me. Luckily, his temperament didn’t rise too much. ‘‘I would never lay a finger on you in a bad way. You’re the only one I care about Y/N. You’re my only friend and also my girlfriend. I love you’‘ He let me know ever so seriously. These words coming from his mouth were surprising. Jerome had always been a bit shy with me. I guess he had gained confidence to tell me that. 

‘‘Are you scared to love me?’‘ He asked me after a while. It’s like he read me like an open book. ‘‘A bit’‘ I answered honestly. Jerome seemed a bit sad about that. It was so strange. I had been watching the news tapes of him over and over again. He had been smiling widely as he shot people. It’s like all his sympathy and love was gone, vanished into thin air. But now it looked like some had stayed. Knowing that he cared about me, and me only, warmed my heart.

‘‘You don’t need to be afraid. You know me Y/N. We have done so many things together and you haven’t been scared then. Yes, I’ve changed but I’ll always be Jerome for you’‘ He promised me sweetly. For a moment, I felt like I could forget his crimes. All the scary laughs and even the fact he killed his mom. Suddenly, Jerome leaned closer to me so the tips of our noses brushed against each other. His hand held onto my waist and his other hand was on my cheek. 

now my heart fluttered for a different reason. ‘’I missed you baby. Please don’t fear me’’ He breathed out. Only a second later he pressed his soft red lips against mine. I shut my eyes and felt overwhelmed. His kiss was so warm and intense. He got so close and the beautiful moment washed my brain, making me focus on only this. Nothing else mattered.

‘‘I’ll make you feel safe again, okay?’‘ He purred and pushed me on my back. Then he nibbled my ear, making me moan a bit. ‘‘Yes Jerome’‘ I replied as calmly as I could. ‘‘You’re my girl, I’ll never let anyone harm you. If anyone even thinks about it, I’ll kill them’‘ He promised me. A minute ago that would have scared me, but now it felt like the most romantic thing ever. 

‘‘Just please stay and don’t die again. I can’t live without you’‘ I told him as he kissed my neck. A shiver ran down my spine because his kisses felt so amazing. He knew all my sweet spots so well. ‘‘Don’t worry about that. One day we will be the kind and queen of this damn city’‘ He purred and then started to drag off my shirt. As he spoke, his voice got even deeper and raspier.

Now that my shirt was on the floor, I put my arms on my stomach. I was still a bit nervous although I had been in this situation with him before. ‘’Don’t hide yourself’’ He told me and grabbed my wrists, pinning them above my head. Suddenly I remembered something not so good.

Jerome noticed it too. He froze on the spot and just stared at my skin. I tried to yank my arm free, but he was stronger than me. ‘’What have you done?’’ He asked me with a bit scary voice. That’s when he moved his eyes away from my scars and looked deep into my eyes. His had turned darker and my fear came back into my body. 

‘‘I..I don’t know’‘ I mumbled and pulled my arm away. Jerome let go and then sat again. I felt really anxious now. So I stood up and walked to my bedroom. Tears stung my eyes and I was sure he’d leave now. Instead of leaving, Jerome followed me, right into the devil’s cave. My room was full of empty bottles of whisky, rum and other strong drinks. I dragged my hair and bit my lips together, hoping that I could cry silently.

‘‘Y/N you’re not okay..’‘ Jerome noticed and then walked up to me. ‘‘How do you know what’s okay and not okay?’‘ I spat rudely without thinking. I regretted it immediately. ‘‘S-sorry..I’m sorry’‘ I breathed out and stepped a few steps back. Jerome wasn’t angry. He seemed..disappointed.  ‘‘I’m so sorry’‘ I sobbed and hit the wall. ‘’Is it because of me?’’ He wanted to know while looking around. My room was a mess. There was a stain of wine on the carpet and a pile of bottles on my nightstand.

‘‘I really..missed you..Jerome’‘ I managed to croak without stuttering. ‘‘I thought ..I lost you for good’‘ I continued and then sobbed. He came back to me and grabbed my hands. ‘‘So I took it out on m-myself. I started drinking and..cutting’‘ I admitted shamefully. I couldn’t even look at him. ‘‘Listen baby’‘ He whispered and took a deep breath. 

‘‘I need you to stop doing that’‘ He started and I sighed. ‘‘It’s not easy’‘ I let him know. Suddenly he cupped my face and looked deep into my eyes. ‘‘I won’t let you do that, okay? I won’t leave anymore. Don’t.be.scared. Just fuck- please trust me, okay?’‘ Jerome got a bit frustrated. It’s like my actions hurt him. It’s a bit ironic because murdering a whole bunch of people didn’t make him sad, but me being sad was too much.

‘‘I’ll try’‘ I promised and blinked away my tears. ‘‘Geez, I thought that you’d hate me for what I did’‘ He admitted, obviously surprised that I still had feelings towards him. I just hugged him and hid my face in the crook of his neck. ‘‘How could I not love you?’‘ I whispered, not sure if he heard me. Now, I just wanted to sink into the moment. Hopefully, this wasn’t another dream of him coming back to me. 

Mixed Emotions

Pairing: Stiles x Reader

Author: @ninja-stiles

Words: 2394

Author’s Note: I thought of the idea of this when I started re-watching teen wolf season three. I fucking love to write angst and fluff so this is what it is! Thank you to my babes, @mf-despair-queen for proofreading this for me <3


Originally posted by stilinskikissme


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Things I was screaming internally about while reading “The Adventures of Charls, the Veretian Cloth Merchant”

WARNING! HUGE SPOILERS AHEAD!

  • “It was obvious that Lamen was not a cloth merchant, he did not know enough about silk. No. He obviously was just a merchant’s assistant.” Good guess, Charls. That explains everything, Charls. You’re so clever, Charls.
  • Charles: “It’s a good thing King Damianos is in Delpha and does not have to worry about prince Laurent being out here.”  Damen: “Yeeeah…”
  • Laurent: “Charls is a common name in Vere.” Damen: “Yes, and getting more common with every day.” Me: #dead
  • Laurent: “We don’t have any Kemptian silk… Oh, did you think we did?! I’m so sorry, golly-gosh, silly me, how awkward.”
  • Damen getting jealous that his gay boyfriend stays alone in a room with a lady. Even though they were not really alone. “Laurent is out of my sight, goodness me, I’m so uncomfortable, Charls, halp!”
  • Smb: “Charls tricked king Damianos.” Damen (jumping up): “No, he did not!” Me: “Gosh, LAMEN, how would YOU know, haha, don’t listen to him.” Do you have any chill, dude? You’ve spent a year “in disguise” in Vere. You’ve learnt nothing, have you?
  • “You do have nice eyes”
  • Damen: “You won’t sit in my lap?” Laurent: “Charls will faint.” Charls: “Oh yes, he will, plz don’t.”
  • Someone insulting Laurent and Damen going into berserk mode. And Lauren is not even trying to stop him, like “You go, boo! Show them what’s for!.. These are your subjects after all…”
  • Laurent throwing olives. Icant.
  • Charls, sitting with Laurent and Alexon behind the overturned table, meeting new people, making new friends, while Laurent provides updates on his boyfriend teaching other people some manners through loud bangs and roars.
  • Charls worrying that they broke some jars and stole the meat. Such a pure innocent soul, let me hug you, real Charls.
  • The whole rabbit skinning scene. I had to cover my face with my hands and sob for about 12 minutes. Can you imagine Damen going back to Laurent? Laurent: “So, what did he want with you?” Damen: “He said that it’s not fitting for a prince to skin a rabbit. So I have to do it.”
  • “This heart-stopping breach of etiquette averted, Charls returned to the camp” – there were literal tears on my face. Good job, Charls. You saved the day.
  • Charls realizing that Damen is useless and “has no real skills whatsoever” and getting a headache. Those good for nothing royal people, amiright, Charls?
  • Laurent laughing. Like, really laughing, easily and merrily. Remember the time we were all stunned by seeing him simply smile? What a time to be alive! 
  • “Charles supposed that he and Guilliame were two of the few who knew the truth of Lamen’s origins.” Oh my sweet baby boy Charls, oh hun, sweetoms, sugar bear… are you in for a big surprise.
  • Smb: “I heard king Damianos spent six hours in bed with that one wrestler guy.” Damen: “Uhh, try seven hours.” Me: “But LAMEN, it’s not like you were there to be able to provide such commentary, gaaawd!!!” Seriously though. How often do you think Laurent had to facepalm during CP and PG? Like “If I didn’t already know who you really are, this is where you would’ve betrayed your true personality.” “And here.” “And again.” “Are you even serious anymore?” “I feel like it’s insulting to my own intellect to keep pretending that I don’t know who you are.” “At this point I’m just curious for how long you can keep it up.”
  • Damen trying to tell Charls who he is, but Charls interrupts him with “No sweat, Lamen. It’s natural to feel nervous around noble people, Lamen. Don’t worry, Lamen. I got your back, Lamen. Just act natural, Lamen.”
  • Damen hiding from Heiron by pulling his hat over his eyes. How did it even work? The dude’s huge!
  • Is there anyone in this party who isn’t a noble in disguise? Poor Charls.
  • Alexon said that a kyros should know stuff about wool and trade – instant BFFs!
  • “I’ll stay with Laurent for as long as he wants me”.
  • We got to see the words “King Laurent of Vere”.  How blessed are we.
  • “There is someone I want you to meet.”
  • I hope “Lamen, why are you dressed up like the King?” weren’t Charls’ last words before he died of heart attack.
BTS’ Reactions to your boyfriend being mean to you and cheering you up

Admin: Mimi

Prompt/Ask: Can I get a bts reaction to you calling late at night because your bf is being a butt and you need to be cheered up? Currently in need of some major fluff. Thanks! You guys are great. Keep it up 😊

Authors note: Thank you for the request and kind words! And I hope this is good enough to fill your fluff needs, and that your day is good to you! Hop into some comfy clothes, lie down in bed, and listen to some music 😉 enjoy!


Jin:

Having gotten into his pyjamas and doing his nightly routine, Jin was just about ready to collapse into bed after another tiring day of practice, but before his head could hit his pillow, his ringtone blared throughout the bedroom. Yoongi groaned a cursed at Jin from his spot in his own bed, and Jin quickly left the bedroom to answer the call. Eyeing your name on the screen, he answered, choice words about cursing your family cow on his tongue before you beat him too it.

“Hey, so, I know it’s late and you’re probably going to bed soon but I just had a really, really, shitty day and I just need someone to vent to and honestly I don’t know any other person who’s a better listener than you,” you said, all in one breath, and Jin’s brain worked to catch up with what you said.

“I’m flattered you think I’m a really good listener,” he said dumbly, and you sighed irritably.

“Wow, really Jin? Really?” you deadpanned, and Jin gave a light laugh.

“I’m sorry, you know me and compliments, can’t ignore them,” you laughed at that, and he was grateful. “What happened?”

You sighed again, this sigh wearier than the last. “What didn’t go wrong. I was late for work, lost my purse, spilled coffee on myself, then my car broke down and my boyfriend refused to help me! Said it was my own fault because I didn’t listen to him when he said I needed to take it to the garage. But it wasn’t as if I didn’t listen to him, I just didn’t have the money at the time for repairs!” you exclaimed, clearly getting more and more agitated the more you talked. Jin checked the time on the clock – 23:11pm. Ok, not bad.

“Come over, I still have some food left over and we can watch a movie while you rant. The guys won’t mind. They love you.”

“…are you sure?” you asked hesitantly.

“Of course, I offered, didn’t I?” he laughed. “Now get your butt over here, or someone else will eat the food before you get it.”

“OK, ok. I’m coming over, see you soon.”

“See you, sweet pea.”

Yoongi:

Yoongi had been working another late night in his studio when he received a call from you. Staring confusedly at the digital clock, 02:26am shining brightly back at him, he frowned at his phone. Sliding the answer tab across the screen, he held the phone to his ear and was about to question why you were up so late when he heard the slightest sniffle from the receiver. He sat up straighter and got right to the point. “What happened?” he asked bluntly, and you gave a shaky laugh.

“Nothing, Yoongi-“

“Bullshit, Y/N. You wouldn’t have called this late if there was nothing wrong,” he stated, and he heard you sigh defeatedly on the other end. There was a beat of silence where you gathered your thoughts before you answered.

“He made a comment about my looks again,” you whispered, and Yoongi chewed on the inside of his cheek to keep from calling your boyfriend something that will just upset you further.

“He’s wrong,” he said simply, and prepared for the onslaught of excuses you were going to spew.

“Well, no, I guess he had a point-“

“No, he didn’t,” Yoongi retorted, and you stayed silent. “You are absolutely beautiful, and someone who loves you shouldn’t put you down like that. They’re supposed to love you for who you are – inside and out. No excuses.”

More silence, except for the occasional sniffle as you absorbed what he said.

Staring at the clock again, Yoongi made a quick decision.

“I’m still in the studio, want to hang with me for a while and listen to what we’re working on? I could use a pair of outside ears to see how the music sounds. I’ll get us some takeout too,” he offered, and it didn’t take much for you to reply with a meek ‘yes’. He gave a wry smile. “Trouble maker, you only like me because I buy you food,” he remarked and his smile grew wider when you gave a genuine laugh.

“Thank you, Yoongi.”

“No problem.”

Hoseok:

Packing up his gear, Hoseok left the dance studio, his phone vibrating in his pocket. Answering it, he walked through the quiet halls, most of the workers gone home.

“Hello, hello, hello!” he greeted jubilantly. You returned the greeting less happily, and Hoseok immediately frowned, his bright smile wiped off his face. Something was wrong. “What’s wrong buttercup? You sound down,” he observed, and made a weak sound in affirmation.

“Yeah, it’s just…he’s been very distant lately, and doesn’t want to hang out with me anymore.” He didn’t have to ask who he was. “Honestly, we never talk anymore, and I just feel really lonely,” you murmured sadly, and Hoseoks heart broke.

“Where are you right now?” he asked, exiting the back doors of the building and standing near the driver of BTS’ car.

“I’m actually near BigHit Ent. I’m in that coffee shop we like around the corner. I came here because I kind of wanted to just be in a busy setting for once, everything’s been too quiet lately,” you answered, and Hoseok knew what he had to do. He excused himself from your call for a minute, and turned to face his driver.

“Take me to the next street over, I have somewhere I need to be.” The driver simply nodded his head, and returned to his spot at the driver’s seat while Hoseok made his way into the back. He placed the phone on his ear again.

“Ok, stay right where you are,” he ordered. “I’m on my way.”

“What, why?” you asked, dumbfounded. It was too late for him to be hanging out with you.

“Because, you’re lonely, and what type of person would I be if I didn’t cheer you up?” he stated. “So get ready, because I’m going to smother you in tender loving care!”

You giggled over the phone. “I can’t wait,” you answered, and he gave a childish squeal that had you laughing harder.

“Good! It’s just gonna be me and you tonight, buttercup!”

Namjoon:

“Y/N? What are you doing here?”

Namjoon was confused as to why you were standing outside his door at near twelve at night, but he soon got his answer, taking in your sombre face and slouched shoulders. You scratched your nose awkwardly and kept your eyes on your feet.

“I’m sorry for just calling in like this, I should have sent a text or something but I really didn’t want to be in my apartment right now. Not while he’s there, anyway,” you mumbled.

“What did he do?” he asked straight away, ushering you inside the apartment and taking off your coat for you. You made an irritated tutting noise and started to pace the length of his living you, rubbing at your temples.

“He started yelling at me today, saying all sorts of things like I was cheating on him, or seeing people behind his back, spreading stuff about him, and I just-“ you cut yourself off mid rant, running your hands through your hair, a sob escaping your lips.

Within a second Namjoon was wrapping his arms around your form, and you melted into his embrace, sighing when his hand started to rub soothing circles on your back. He held you close to him, and let you stay there for as long as you needed. You pulled back and wiped at your eyes, scoffing out a laugh.

“I suppose coming straight here won’t help my defence against his accusations,” you chuckled bitterly, but Namjoon shook his head, wrapping an arm around your shoulders and tucking you into his side.

“He’s an idiot for even thinking that of you, and you deserve way better than that. You’re staying here tonight, I’m not letting you go back to that asshole. You can have my bed. No buts,” he said when he saw you open your mouth in protest, and you simply sighed in resign. “Good, now, let’s go watch some YouTube videos on some onesies, shall we?”

Jimin:

Jimin laughed into the phone, his phone currently tucked in between his ear and the pillow beneath his head. He spent hours talking to you since he got home from practice, and it was nearing the time that he should be asleep, unless he wanted to be exhausted tomorrow. Suddenly, you asked him a question.

“Jimin…am I boring?”

His mouth opened and closed, completely confused and flustered at the random question, but he could sense this was something that was bothering you for a while. You had been slightly subdued all evening, but he thought to leave it, in case you needed space. Finally formulating a sentence, he answered your question.

“No, absolutely not! Why would you think that?”

“Well…my boyfriend was introducing me to some of his friends today, and he said ‘don’t mind her, she’s just a bit boring’, when I was being quiet. Am I boring?” you asked again, and Jimin felt anger flare up inside of him at your boyfriend’s words. Who in their right mind would say that about their partner? Especially while they’re standing next to you?

“No, you aren’t. You are one of the funniest, most entertaining people I’ve ever met,” he explained, honesty dripping from every word he spoke. “You’re amazing, and kind, and sweet, and I honestly can’t go a day without talking to you. You help brighten up my day, easily. So don’t listen to him – that was incredibly rude of him, and someone as lovely as you shouldn’t have to hear those kind of awful words.”

“…thank you Jimin,” you whispered, yet he could hear the smile in your voice. Good. You deserve nothing less than happiness.

“Now, we should both head to bed, get our beauty sleep. Not that you need it,” he added, smirking when you spluttered indignantly. “Night night, sugar plum,” he murmured.

“Night night, Jiminy Cricket.”

Taehyung:

“Tae, am I being paranoid or something? You do see this, don’t you?”

When you had rung Taehyung and woken him from his deep slumber at 2am in the morning, he knew something had gone wrong. And he was right. On your boyfriends snapchat, and his friends snapchat, were pictures and videos of him – dancing and grinding with various girls on the dancefloor of some low-end club on his night out. Seems like he had forgotten his beloved, who was waiting at home for him. And so, you rang him in hysterics, and now Taehyung was attempting to pick up the pieces.

“Am I not good enough? Am I ugly? Too annoying? What’s wrong with me Tae? Why would he do that? Does he not love me anymore?” you rambled, your voice shaky as waves of tears spilled down your face, and Taehyung had to cut you off before you got really destructive.

“Are you crazy? How could you even think that? You’re perfect, Y/N! I couldn’t imagine a better person than you – sweet, funny, so very beautiful, everything! I don’t know what that idiot thinks he’s doing, but he’s seriously messing up. He doesn’t realise a good thing when he has it, and if he’s willing to throw that away for some random girl, then fine. It’s his loss, and you deserve way better than that scumbag. I want you to put down your phone, and stop looking at it. I’m coming to get you.”

“Really?” you questioned. “But it’s late, you should be in bed-“

“Nope! Stop! Don’t wanna hear it! I’m collecting you, and we’re going to the nearest drive in and we’re gonna get a lot of food and watch the stars over the look out. Got it?”

You sniffled sadly into the phone, and Taehyung winced. “…got it.”

“I don’t want you feeling sad, so I will do everything in my power to make you smile, because I love you and I care about you. So get ready, I’ll be there soon!”

Jungkook:

“Hey, I’m standing outside your door, can you let me in?”

Jungkook shuffled tiredly to the door, phone in hand and body cramped after his nap on the couch, and answered the door, letting you in without hesitation. You pocketed your phone and walked with Jungkook to the living room, rubbing at your eyes.

“What’s up?” he inquired, taking a seat on the sofa once more and gesturing for you to do the same. You took a seat beside him and sank into the cushions, looking more worn out than he’s ever seen you. His brows furrowed in concern.

“It’s my boyfriend,” you explained, moving hair out of your face as you spoke. “I had a really tiring and bad day today, and all I wanted to do when I came home was relax by myself, but he wasn’t having any of it. He kept nagging me and poking me and I just got really annoyed and stormed out of the apartment. And then I came here. All I wanted was some peace and quiet…”

Jungkook knew he was a playful person, and he knew he could push people’s limits with his joke, but he always knew when to stop. Especially when it came to you, he knew better than to provoke you. So, he allowed himself to become your safe haven for tonight.

“Wow, idiot. It’s like he doesn’t know you at all. Lucky for you, I was just about to watch some Iron Man,” he stuck his tongue out when you groaned at the movie suggestion. “We can watch the movie together. I’ll make some popcorn and get out the blankets, just stay here, put your feet up, and relax.” He moved to stand, but you caught his arm at the last minute, preventing him from moving any further.

“Thank you so much, Jungkook. I can always count on you.”

He flushed at the admission, but recovered enough to tease you just a little, sending a playful wink your way.

“No problem. I am the best, after all,” he boasted, and ducked his head when you aimed a cushion at his head. He smirked at your loud laughter, and moved away to get the items he needed.

Without a shadow of a doubt, whenever you needed Jungkook, he would always be there for you.

"I love you too, by the way"

1k, Belle and Adam One-Shot, ff.net
A one-shot of the scene (and conversation) that must have occurred between the kiss and the reunion with the servants. Set after the 2017 film, but it really applies to the original also.

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never enough | jungkook


pairing:
jeon jungkook | reader 
genre: angst, (very light) smut, bestfriends!au [requested]
word count: 3.4k

“You know, it hurt when I realized that you’re not in love with me. But nothing can compare to the pain I felt when I saw you fall in love with her.” [prompt from here]

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I Held a Swastika.

Part of my hospital chaplaincy duties is to write a reflection on how it’s going. Identities may be altered for privacy. All the writings are here.


The nurse told me that the patient, Willard, had taken a bite out of another nurse. He had swung at one of the doctors and thrown urine at a surgeon. Willard had multiple organ failure and he couldn’t walk; he kept demanding to go home. “Get me a wheelchair, I’ll flop in and ride over you people.” The staff kept trying to get him to stay, to get treated, despite his violent non-compliance: because nurses and doctors have the guts to look past that stuff.

They called for a chaplain to ask about Willard’s family members, to see if anyone could pick him up when he was discharged. I was the lucky chaplain who took the order.

When I walked in, I immediately noticed the patient had a tattoo of a heart on his hand, near the inner-fold of his thumb, with a swastika in the middle of the heart. The cognitive dissonance was startling. Not “I love mom” or his wife’s name, I thought, with a bit of snark. But hate in your heart. Very subtle.

“He’s one of those, you know, angry old fogeys,” the nurse had whispered right before I walked in. The nurse was a Middle Eastern man, about my age, and I couldn’t imagine the awful things he had to go through with this patient the last few days.

My eyes locked on the swastika first. The symbol held a terrible place in my memory: when I was a kid, someone had spraypainted a red swastika next to the front door of my dad’s business. Though my dad had tried to paint over it, I could still see it on hot summer days, a scar on the wall and a scar in my head, a mad throbbing declaration of all the world’s ugliness dripping in crimson. I still dream about it sometimes, and in the dream I’ll peer down at my wrists, which are engraved with the same red marks down to the veins.

The patient, Willard, saw me and said, “Thank God, a chaplain, finally someone who can hear me.”

But I don’t want to hear you, I thought. And a sick part of me also thought, You deserve this. I hope you never leave. Then you can’t hurt anyone out there.

He said, “Look, I see your face, I’m not trying to hurt anybody. You get it? I just want to go home. Fetch me a f__ing wheelchair, would you?.”

Willard got louder. He clenched his fists and waved them around. It was rather sad to see someone so animated and aggressive while pinned down to a bed, like the blanket had eaten his lower half and he was trying to crawl out. “Come on, I told you people that I wouldn’t hurt nobody. I got a dozen things wrong with me, I’m not a danger to you, I want to go home and to die in peace. You hear me? I’m ready to go home and die.”

He went on like this for over a minute. That’s a long time to stand there and let someone monologue with escalating hysteria. He dropped more f-bombs and jabbed a finger at me and tried to point at the whole hospital. His voice got so loud that I was worried about the patients nearby, and that maybe the nurse would call security, or that Willard himself would keel over. At several points it looked like he wanted to hop out of the bed and punch my ankles. The strange swastika-heart tattoo flashed before me like a flag on fire.

I had half a mind to leave. I didn’t have to stay. I didn’t want to stay. I kept looking at that swastika. I kept thinking he deserved to be here, to be sick and sorry and helpless.

When Willard stopped talking for a moment, I said the only thing I could think of.

“I’m sorry, Mr. Willard. It sounds like you have a lot going on and it’s been really hard for you.”

He said, “Yes, yes it’s been hard. I swear, I’m not a bad person.” And he burst into tears.

Just like that, his face flipped from anger to grief, and his entire body melted into the bed. Just a broken down old man, crying.

Then he motioned so I could hold his hand. He needed me to hold that hand.

For a second, I stood there, confused and bewildered and infuriated. This is not okay, I thought. You’re everything I hate about the world. Why would you think this is okay?

I pictured two of me, one turning about face and never looking back and absolutely unable to endorse what this guy stood for, and the other me stepping forward in an ostensible betrayal of my deepest values, of my father, of that little child who had to ask why someone would paint such a dirty symbol of hatred over us. I remembered going with my dad to buy new paint, his face set and smiling and determined to be better than this, to make it in a harsh, lonely country that never fully welcomed him, but that he welcomed anyway, because he dared to believe in bigger dreams than the ones that had been painted for him. And I wondered if we were ever going to make it like this, that if we walked away from each other that we would ever heal, and if maybe the very same hands that could carve such scars could also build a life through those wounds, too.

Dad, you showed me something better. You dreamed bigger. You built the dream in me.

So I stepped forward anyway.

I held that man’s hand. I held his swastika, that ugly little tattoo with the heart tattooed around it. 

Willard sobbed, loudly. I asked if he believed in prayer, and he did. I prayed. When I finished, I tried to pull my hand back, but he wasn’t having it. The nurse walked in, a little alarmed, giving me that look: This guy is a real human being who cries, huh?

The nurse prepared a syringe and gave Willard a few shots. My hand was nearly crushed. Willard kept sobbing; I must’ve held his hand for fifteen minutes while he wept and wept. I was silent. No words would work here. And at some point, our hands together, I didn’t want to leave anymore. This all made sense somehow, some kind of crazy giddy exuberant kind of sense, like God or the universe or fate had aligned and unlocked and we were exactly as we were meant to be. I still wasn’t entirely comfortable, and I wasn’t okay with all this man represented: but I pictured a river breaking through, breaking up our old walls and taking down the guard-posts and making the roads new. I wish I could fully describe the lightness in my being right then, a kind of diffused outwardness from my elbow to my fingertips, like my arm was stretching with a pulse. We were painting something different, maybe for our first time. I didn’t think this made me the “bigger person,” because I had every instinct to leave, and there were plenty of times I had failed at this before. I only knew that I had to choose against myself, and choices like this matter, maybe more than the ones we want right now.

When we parted, Willard looked up at me with eyes brimming red.

He didn’t say anything. He only nodded. And inexplicably, we both laughed, just once. I don’t know why we laughed, but it was good.

Later, I told my fellow chaplain, “I have to tell you the craziest story.”

And my friend, at the end, laughed at the obvious symbolism.

“I guess you were the heart around that guy’s swastika.”

I could only nod. I was my father, painting over old scars.

J.S.

BTS Reaction: Their S/O never sharing her feelings/ being open

 @purplepokemons said:

Can I request a bts reaction to their s/o never opening up and sharing her feelings as she feels like its a burden and she would just sound annoying or silly please 🙉😙😙😙


Thanks for the request! Sorry it took so long :( But I hope its okay


*gifs are not mine unless I say so*

*requests are open*

WARNING: May be a little emotional


Jin: “Y/N, are you ok? You’ve been acting strange..” Jin asked you.

 “Yeah, I’m fine.” You said and tried to give him a convincing smile. He noticed that your smile didn’t reach your eyes, and he sat by you. He pulled you into a hug while you hold back your emotions.

 “Y/N, it’s okay to tell me what’s wrong. I’m here for you.” He said. You finally gave in and started to sob into his chest.

 “Baby please don’t hold back your feelings again, okay?” 

Originally posted by jiminahhh



 Suga: I feel Yoongi doesn’t like expressing feelings much either. He would have just come home from practice and noticed you weren’t there. He figured you were sleeping, so he decided he’d go lay down with you. As he entered the room, he saw you weren’t sleeping. You were sitting up while hugging your knees into your chest. He heard you sniffle, and he immediately got worried. 

“Y/N?” He asked. You looked up and he saw your swollen eyes.

 "What’s wrong?“ He asked you. You explained the problem to him and he pulled you into his arms to comfort you.

 "Talk to me next time. I love you y/n”

Originally posted by yoonggi


J-Hope:

Hoseok wouldn’t start to notice until you weren’t laughing at his craziness like you use to. You still laughed, but it didn’t sound convincing to him. So one day he wanted to confront you about it. You were sitting next to him on couch, while looking at comments on twitter. He glanced at your phone screen and read the harsh comments from his fans. He pulled the phone out of your hand and hugged you.

“Why didn’t you tell me? Is this why you’ve been acting different? Y/N I love you, please don’t listen to those comments. Your mine and they can’t change it.” He whispered softly as you silently cried into his chest.

Originally posted by silenhciosa

(Him after he saw you reading the comments)


Rap Monster:

Namjoon could probably see right through you. Just the slightest change in your attidude would tell him something was wrong. He probably think he did something wrong, so he would start to make sure he is more affectionate towards you. But your attitude wasn’t changing. So he wanted to do everything for you to be happy again.  He had Jin help him make a fancy dinner for you and he bought you a boquet of flowers. When you got home, he would immediatly apologize for what ever he did.

“Y/N, I don’t know what I did, but I’m sorry. I just want to see you happy again. Forgive me?” He asked and handed you the flowers. You couldn’t help but smile.

“Namjoon, you didn’t do anything wrong.”You said as you frowned at your real problem.

“What’s wrong then?” 

You told him what was wrong as you and him ate dinner together. He would tell you on how you can overcome your problem and do anything to make you happy.

Originally posted by keepingupwithbts

(him trying to cheer you up)


Jimin:

Jimin wouldn’t notice through the skype calls, he would probably think you’ve been tired. He wanted to suprise you by coming home a day earlier than said he was. He opened your apartment door and saw you sitting on the couch. He rushed over to hug you, but you quickly covered your face while he hugged you. You didn’t want him to see that your eyes were swollen from crying. He noticed what you were doing, and he gentley grabbed your hands and moved them. He saw that you were crying, and he wiped your tears away with his thumbs.

“Are those happy tears or sad tears?” He asked you, with his hands still on your cheeks.

“Both.” You admitted. “They were sad because I can’t help but read your fans comments about me… I’m sorry.” You hugged him again and kissed the top of you head.

“But I saw you walk through the door, they became happy tears because I missed you so much.” you say.

Originally posted by park-jimizzle

(after he saw you crying)


V:


When Tae noticed your attitude started to change, he would probably assume it was “your time of the month”. He be careful of what he would say to you, and try to do thing for you. He would buy you chocolate, and even buy you tampons/pads when you didn’t even ask. 

“Why did you buy tampons?” You asked Tae as he walked through the door with them in his hands. 

“I wanted to make sure you didn’t run out.” He said and gave you a smile.

“I’m not even on my period.” You said awkwardly.

“Wait, I thought’s that’s why you’ve been being quiet though.” He said confused. 

“What’s wrong then?” He asked and sat by you. He looked at you with concern as you quicky wrapped your arms around him and sobbed into his chest.

“Shh, baby it’ll be ok..” He said while rubbing the back of you head.

Originally posted by suga-com


Jungkook:

I don’t know why, but I can see him getting irritated with your change in attitude. You would start to distance yourself from him so he wouldn’t notice that you aren’t the happiest. He would eventually get tired of you trying to avoid him and would confront you. But without realizing, he started to yell at you.

“Y/N if you are just gonna avoid, at least give me a reason! If you don’t want to be with me just go ahead and break up with! I’m tired of this!” His yelled at you.

“Kookie, please don’t yell at me..” You said quietly, trying to hold back your tears. He noticed your pained expression on his face, and immediatly regreted yelling at you. 

“Y/N, I-I’m sorry for yelling.. Can you please tell me what’s wrong?” He asked as he sat by you. 

“I’m avoiding you because I don’t want you to see me like this..” You said while crying as he pulled you into his chest. 

“Baby, don’t be afraid to cry infront of me..”

Originally posted by jengkook

(him noticing you about to cry)


I hope this was ok! Sorry it took so long :(

My sadness is no longer quiet. I’ve become aware of it in my gradual realization that I hoard memories worse than any other person I know. I can’t seem to let go of things, whether they be people or not. Even as a kid, I couldn’t rip the tags off of stuffed animals or dolls because I didn’t want to forget where I got them.
I remember delicate details about moments that other people forget within days. I’m the one that holds on to them so tightly my knuckles turn white.
I remember the kisses she gave me on that Saturday night that she seemed to forget, I remember my cracked hands refusing to hold hers while I sobbed on her bed surrounded by her shaking words trying to figure out the right ones to say. I remember looking at her for longer than I should have, trying to figure out why I felt the way I did when we locked eyes.
I miss sitting on her bed in silence and staring at that black galaxy painting on her wall next to her array of books and pictures. I miss looking over to see her strumming her guitar without a care in the world, with her white button up ever so slightly loosened where I could see her dark skin peeking through. I wondered why you crossed your legs like that, while I stared at your fingers dancing on the strings suddenly wishing they were intertwined with mine. You sat there and you played, you played through the silence as my sobbing dwindled to nearly nothing and I found myself staring at what later I’d figure out to be the girl I’ve loved like no one else.
I sit on my bed in my cold room shaking. The temperature in the house is fine, but my legs are tense, and I find myself franticly switching positions to try and find comfort. I don’t. She was my comfort. She still is. Yet I am no longer hers, maybe I never was, I realized so suddenly that she never let go of the girl that brought her that home sort of feeling that she brought me.
I need to stop finding homes in people and try harder to forget things that don’t matter. But the more I convince myself she’s a lesson and not a ‘forever’, the more I try to wish that she is the farthest thing from temporary.
—  please don’t stay gone
How The Chocobros Cry Feat. Ravus Nox Fleuret

Feel free to leave a head-canon request in my inbox. I just felt like doing these for fun!


Noctis Lucis Caelum

  • The “cry until I get what I want” crier.
  • He always looks for some kind of comfort - a hand on his shoulder, a sympathetic look, a talk - anything will do.
  • Noctis always starts out with a sniff and a hand reaching up to rub his nose, it’s a habit he picked up when he was a kid because he’s got those drippy nose tears.
  • He’s not a guy who sobs, per se, but he absolutely cannot talk while he cries without it coming out like an unintelligent mess of syllables. 
  • He just really wants a friend during this time and sometimes wishes his dad were around more to pick him up when he’s feeling down. 
  • Noctis blows his nose when he cries, a lot, and ends up with a bright red snoot for most of the day following because of the dryness. 

Prompto Argentum

  • The “I don’t cry” crier.
  • Prompto had his fair share of cries when he was younger, mostly because of bullying and out of loneliness. However, he found that - at the time - no one would listen to him or offer a hand, so crying seemed like a waste in the long run. 
  • He close to never cries now that he’s older, there’s just no reason for it and he’s actually afraid it would make him look weak in front of his friends. He looks up to them all as emotionally strong and sound people, and wants them to do the same.
  • If ever the occasion does arise, Prompto is as silent as can be when he cries, tears dripping down his face and not a breath out of place - but he does bury his face in his hands.
  • The last time he cried, Pryna was there and the dog licked away his tears.
  • If he ever feels the need, you can bet he’ll fight them back until the well dries up altogether. 

Gladiolus Amicitia

  • The “real men cry” crier.
  • Gladiolus doesn’t mind crying, he actually thinks it’s completely healthy and good for one’s mental wellbeing. 
  • He loves crying happy tears, like when Ignis had given him a book for the first birthday they celebrated of his as friends instead of weights or gear like everyone else had given him. Big guy was down for the count with those suckers pricking at the corners of his eyes. 
  • Nothing really gets him like a sappy romance novel; some of them have left him fucked up for hours at a time. 
  • Gladiolus doesn’t make much noise when he cries, just a hitch of a breath and lots of sniffles.
  • He doesn’t mind crying in front of people, sometimes sharing the pain is the best way to get over it.
  • He’s more likely to cry over emotionally moving things than physical injury.

Ignis Scientia

  • The “if you didn’t see me, I didn’t do it” crier.
  • Ignis prefers to cry alone; it’s best because he likes to gather his thoughts, tries to rationalize through the events that brought about the upset and then get over it with the utmost grace. 
  • He doesn’t believe crying shows weakness, it’s normal to become upset with things, but as the one who is most put together within their team - his emotional strength is of the utmost importance.
  • His eyes swell a bit when he cries, so even if he tries to hide it and no one brings it up, chances are they already know. 
  • After a cry, he gets the hiccups. They’re bloody annoying. 
  • He really hates when tears get on his glasses, they tend to level at the bottom brink and are ridiculously hard to clean without his lens wipes.
  • He’s cried openly in front of Noctis and only once in front of Gladiolus; he tries to avoid such a thing with Prompto because the blond tends to fret a lot and he dislikes worrying him.

Ravus Nox Fleuret

  • The “there’s just something in my eye” crier.
  • Also the ugly crier.
  • Hyperventilates.
  • If someone so much as witnesses him shedding a tear, he will outright deny it whilst grabbing a tissue. 
  • For about a year after the Empire struck, Ardyn despised having to visit him because Ravus would cry on sight, face twisting so grotesquely that the Chancellor thought him kin to the daemons. 
  • Pryna was his living Kleenex. 
  • Growing up, he reeled in his emotions and doesn’t allow his heart to tether to anything tightly enough to evoke tears when lost - however, a stubbed toe may bring about a watery drop or two.
  • Upon discovering Lunafreya’s death, his sadness was overwhelming, but he refused to shed a tear. 
  • Remembering his mother always fills the well anew, however. 

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just a break- h.s imagine

Originally posted by ohstylesno

Harry and Y/N were the couple that everyone envied. Their love was something you only saw in fairytales. It was something your parents told you that once you found something so magical and so spectacular, don’t ever let go. It was them against the world. But what happens when everyone is waiting for them to crumble? What happens when the spotlight comes too much? What happens if your love wasn’t as strong as everyone thought it was?


“What happened to us?” Y/N whispered softly as Harry held her on his lap while sitting on the cold floor of his apartment. Harry sighed and closed his eyes while placing a gentle kiss on top of her head. For the past couple of weeks, the couple have been doing nothing but arguing with one another. Whether they were yelling about silly things such as not placing a dirty dish into the dishwasher or yelling about articles accusing things such as cheating; they were constantly yelling.

“I don’t know, love.” Harry sighed while playing with the ends of Y/N’s hair. “Maybe we should take a break..”

Y/N quickly turned her head and looked at Harry. “A break? I..I know we’ve been fighting a lot lately-“

“We’ve been fighting constantly, love” Harry said while looking down at his hands.

“I know but..a break? How is that going to make anything better? If anything it’s going to drive us even more apart than we already are!” Y/N exclaims while getting off Harry’s lap, tears already surfacing her eyes.

Harry quickly grabbed Y/N’s hands and looked into her eyes that once carried so much love for him but now held hurt from his words. “It’s not a permanent break, love! Maybe..maybe until I leave for tour, yeah? We just need time to cool off from everything! We need to figure out where we fit into each other’s life.”

Y/N choked back on a sob. “Where we fit into each other’s life? Harry, you’re my entire world. Is it because you want to see other people while you’re on tour? Is it because you don’t want to have to worry about the burden of your girlfriend back at home?!”

“You know I would never even think about someone who isn’t you! Why would you accuse me of that!” Harry stood up and began walking into the kitchen.

“Because you said you wanted a break! How is that supposed to make me feel..” Y/N shouted as she followed Harry into the kitchen. Harry turned back around and looked at his girlfriend of two years with tears in his eyes. “It’s supposed to make you feel loved. It’s supposed to show you that I love you and that I want this relationship to continue forever but it won’t if we’re constantly fighting. This break is going to give us that opportunity. It’s going to show how much we mean to each other.” Harry walked up to Y/N and grabbed her waist and pulled her closer. “Please Y/N. Please see it that way. Please see it as a way to bring us together again..” Harry cried while burying his face into the crook of Y/N’s neck.

Slowly Y/N wrapped her arms around Harry’s neck and pulled him closer. They held onto each other for what felt like a lifetime. “Okay..” Y/N eventually said while sniffing and rubbing her bloodshot eyes. “We’ll take a break.”

“Just a break..” Harry whispered into her ear with his closed.  

But it wasn’t just a break. After that night at Harry’s apartment, the two shared their “last night” together. That night, Harry showed Y/N just how much he meant to her again and again. 

Eventually Harry left for tour. Y/N cried into his arms at the airport while Harry shushed her and whispered, “Just for a little while, lovely.” But when Harry left, he left her physically and emotionally. His calls were rare and his texts were forced. Y/N was heartbroken. What became her biggest fear from the break came true. What was promised to be just a break turned out to be just the end of their relationship.


hey guys! this was my first imagine ever and i am so nervous about it! omfg as im writing this, my hands are shaking. please let me know what you guys think! please let me know if i should continue or not! thanks for reading! all the love, taylor.

*gif isn’t mine! all creds to owner!*

You’re worth it

Hope you enjoy this even though it’s a quite serious issue. Always remember that you are beautiful and that your worth everything. Life can be cruel sometimes but wherever it’s dark there is also light. You’re loved! xoxo 

(Picture is not mine!)

Warnings: Cutting



With a huge smile on my face and my heart skipping beats between my chest, I closed the door to my house behind me and slowly made my way to my boyfriend’s place. Even though I just saw him a couple of hours ago, I couldn’t wait to see him again. Every second I spent without him was wasting precious time and I definitely couldn’t allow it. Whenever we were apart, I had the urge to haste to him and just be with him, in his arms. I missed him always, no matter if he had seen him hours or even minutes ago. He meant so much to me, I could not even imagine a complete life without him.

While walking, I went through different ideas in my head about how we could pass some time. There were occasions were Marcel and I just watched romantic comedies, because they were his favorite, all cuddled up against each other or we took a walk outside, talking about different stuff. Sometimes, we sat there and did not talk to each other, being wrapped in each other’s arms, just enjoying the silence that surrounded us. As long as I was with Marcel, I was the happiest girl in the world and nothing would ever change this.

When I finally arrived at Marcel’s, I knocked on the door gently. However, after waiting for a few minutes, nobody had still opened the door for me so I took out a spare key that Marcel gave me to his house so I had always access to it whenever I wished to be there. I unlocked the door and stepped inside, being greeted by nothing but silence.

“Marcel?” I called after him.

I was wondering if nobody was at home but according to Marcel’s shoes placed besides the entry I assumed he had to have been present.

“Marcel, baby, are you at home?”

As I got no response, I walked towards the stairs to check up if he was upstairs in his room. Maybe he had been in the shower, that’s why he hadn’t noticed my presence yet. With hasty steps, I walked up the stairs and headed to his room. I wanted to push down the handle as suddenly I perceived sobbing sounds on the other side. With worry immediately consuming me, I pushed the door open only to be confronted with the most horrific image that I had seen in my entire life. My heart wrenched immediately in my chest and I felt a stinging pain that could have been compared to what you would feel when you would have been stabbed by thousand knives.

Right in the corner of the room, Marcel was placed in a seated position on the ground. In one hand, he held a sharp razor while his other wrist was injured. Blood dripped from his wound and soaked his pants with the red liquid. His eyes were blood-shot and he cried uncontrollably, more and more tears slid along his rosy cheeks. I ran towards him and let myself fall to the ground right in front of him.

“Marcel, what have you done?!” I squealed in disbelief. I knocked the razor out of his hand which landed a few meters away from us. Taking his hands in mine, I started to examine the wound he had created. He had damaged his soft skin.

“Marcel, what is this? Why have you done this?” He kept his head tilted down in shame, refusing to look at me in the eyes. To my dismay, I found out that it wasn’t the first time he had cut himself. I discovered a few more scars along his wrist, some of them were even fresh and new, probably being cut a not long time ago. Realization hit me like a heavy brick and I had realized that my boyfriend cut himself behind my back and I was foolish not to recognize it. How could I oversee a serious issue like this? What kind of girlfriend had I been?

I fought against the urge to cry and scream because I knew I had to be strong for him. Whatever reason had leaded him to the choice of harming himself, I would find it out but now he needed my comfort and support.

I instantly rushed to the bathroom and grabbed the first aid kid. Taking the utensils I needed, I went back to Marcel and started to treat his wound. Luckily, the cut wasn’t too deep as I could tell and it would heal very soon.

I took wadding pad and soaked it with a disinfectant. “This may sting a little.” I told him, dabbing it carefully along his wound. He hissed slightly to the contact. After I cleaned the injury, I wrapped a bandage afterwards so it would heal properly.

Marcel had not calmed down yet, still crying whatever made him cry.

“Baby, what’s going on?” I croaked, pulling him into my arms. He wrapped his own weakly around my body and nestled his face in the crook of my neck, his tears covering my skin. I wondered what had made him so upset, so desperate that he felt like he had to punish himself with cutting his wrist. I gave him time as much as he needed to relax, stroking his hair gently and humming his favorite song in his ear.

“Marcel, tell me what happened. Tell me what had made you so upset.”

“I don’t deserve you, (Y/N).” He croaked. “I don’t deserve you. I’m worthless. I still have no idea why you’re with me. I’m a nerd. Pathetic and worthless. Why are you doing this to yourself? I’m ruining your image.”

My mouth went wide open as the harsh words escaped his lips. I felt another sting in my heart but this time it hurt so much more than the time before that.

“What are you talking about, Marcel?”

“You know I ruin your reputation and yet you’re with me. Why (Y/N)? Is it because of pity? Do you pity me?”

Whoever planted such bullshit into his head, was going to pay for it. Somebody has messed up his brain so badly, that Marcel started to doubt my feelings for him.

“You know that’s not true, Marcel. None of this is true, baby. Why are you talking like this?”

“Because I’m a pathetic little shit who thinks somebody like you could ever love me.” He started to cry again. I felt absolutely helpless, out of words. Marcel had been upset before but never had it been this bad about our relationship.

“I do love you, Marcel. Gosh, I love you so so much. You’re the best that has happened in my life and I’m not going to stop loving you. I can’t live without you… Please believe me…”

“Worthless… pathetic…” He whimpered. “I cannot offer you anything, (Y/N). Nothing. Look at me. Look at the nerd. You should break up with me. You’re better without me…”

“What the fuck?! No! I’m not leaving you, Marcel. For god’s sake, tell me what happened!”

“Jason happened, okay?!” He screamed, making my body flinch in shock. As he realized that he scared me off, he shared an apologetic look. “I’m sorry.”

“What did Jason tell you?” I asked him. Actually, he didn’t have to answer because I knew exactly what Jason did to him. That prick was supposed to be my boyfriend a long time ago but also was known as the bully at our grade. He mostly wasted his time humiliating people in front of others but the only person who suffered a lot under his attacks was unfortunately Marcel.

Yes, Marcel was different that the others. He was labeled as the nerd in school but I didn’t care. I actually found him cute since the moment I saw him. The way he looked didn’t bother me at all, I knew Marcel was a good person from the inside. His nerdy and funny demeanor drew me to him and I slowly noticed myself falling for him. Marcel was special, he was unique in his own way and I appreciated that he wasn’t like every other student in our school.

Besides, nobody knew Marcel because they never gave him a chance to prove himself. Nobody except for me knew the gentle soul that had been hiding behind those large glasses.

“I know you don’t want to talk about this but whatever Jason had told you baby, don’t believe him He can be manipulative, you know that. I love you, really love you. With all my heart.”

I kissed his forehead gently and felt Marcel’s stiffened body calming down from his outburst. With my thumps, I wiped away every tear that made its way out of his mesmerizing green eyes that I learned to love and adore.

“Don’t cry baby.” I tried to comfort him. “I’m gonna prepare a nice bath for you, what do think about that, hmm?” I stood up and stretched my arm out from him to grab it. “Sounds nice to you?”

He answered by nodding his head, sniffling and after I ordered him to take off his clothes carefully because I didn’t want him to hurt himself, I went back to the bathroom and prepared a nice and hot bath for my frustrated and poor boyfriend. I threw a pink bath bomb which was Marcel’s favorite and after everything was done, he was allowed to enter the bath tub. Gently and carefully, I helped him to sit down. He leaned back, closing his eyes, while I took a place at the edge of the tub.

I let my fingers slid between his, intertwining our hands. While Marcel let himself drown in relaxation, I took my time to observe his side profile adoringly. If anyone would be sitting right next to me, would have witnessed the huge amount of love that I shared for him in my eyes. I was very open about my feelings for him and never failed to show them. Affectionate kisses in front of others, gently brushing my hand against his, clinging onto his body like he was the only important resource for my existence, I did all of them and I wasn’t ashamed.  He was so endlessly pure and beautiful, angel-like even, and he didn’t deserve to be treated the way he was being treated. If anyone deserved the entire universe, it was definitely Marcel.

My fingers traced the outline of his sharp jaw line tenderly, sensing the muscles tensing under my touch. He leant into my sweet gesture. “Beautiful.” I whispered. Taking his injured hand, I placed kisses on each of his knuckles.

“You’re beautiful to me, Marcel. No matter what others think about you, it won’t stop me from loving you. You’re not worthless, how can you even think that? You are important to me and to your family. You don’t have to be popular or have a reputation to be loved. You’re amazing just the way you are, my love, and I never want you to forget this. You’re worth it, you’re worth my love and the effort that I put into our relationship.”

Again, a tear slid along his face. “You made me the happiest girl alive and I’m so grateful to call you mine, Marcel. You make me feel nothing but special like nobody has. I can’t just give someone like you up so easily. I would die if I lost you. My heart couldn’t handle a separation because you have it. You own my heart. Every single part of you owns my heart, Marcel. I love you.”

“I love you, too.” He responded, his voice shaking slightly.

“I don’t want you to cut yourself ever again, you hear me? You won’t harm your body over a thing like this. You have to promise me Marcel. You’re not only hurting yourself but also me.”

“I will try, promise.” He mumbled.

“I’m here for your, baby. Anytime.” I leaned forward to catch his lips with mine. I kissed him hard and passionate, putting all my emotions into that one single kiss. After we pulled away for air, I decided to wash his body and saw that worry and doubt was drifting off of him.

When the water started to turn cool, I let him get out and helped him getting dressed into a sweatshirt and sweatpants.

“Cuddle with me?” He asked innocently and I could do nothing but to agree to it.

There we laid, in each other’s arms, safe and secure, letting nothing but joy and laughter getting in between us. Jason would pay for what he did, for messing up with Marcel and he was going to pay hard for it. I was going to make sure that he never took a chance to attack him. If someone was very protective over him, then it was me.

“Thank you, (Y/N).” Marcel mumbled against my neck. His breath on my skin caused goose bumps on my entire body. “Thank you so much. I love you.”

“I love you, too, handsome. So much. Remember, you’re worth everything.”

“Will do.” He murmured back.

And started to drift off to sleep…

[ Imagine #22 ] Thunderstorms ~ Newt

Fandom: The Maze Runner

Pairing: Newt x reader

Word count: 2000 words

Request: Can I please get one where NewtxReader are at the Right Arm and one of the girls flirts with Newt. Him and reader get into an argument that Newt sleeps in a different tent. There’s a thunderstorm, reader hates thunderstorms. So she goes to the tent where Newt is at. There’s one that literally scares Newt wake and he sees her trying to shield herself. He cuddles her and they both apologize? Please just loads of fluff please? Sorry if I doesn’t make sense.

Tthanks for the request and i hope this is what you wanted ^^

Masterlist

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I sat on a rock a bit secludedly the camp of the right arm, staring in the distance. Since we escaped WICKED three days ago, i had a lot to think about.

I had barely spoke to my boyfriend Newt, he was either with Thomas  to discuss plans against WICKED, or with his long lost and now found sister Sonya and her friends.

Don’t get me wrong, i couldn’t be more happier for Newt that he finally found his sister, but i missed him. I  missed the time in the glade, when it had been only the two of us, i missed talking to him and i especially missed sleeping next to him.

Back in the glade we slept together in my room, and now i wasn’t really used to sleep alone and without him. We still shared a tent, but he woke up long before me and in the evenings he stayed up late, so that i usually was long asleep before he layed down next to me.

“He, Y/N! Come down for dinner!”

This was Thomas, and because he obviously was to lazy to just climb up to me, he yelled so loud that probably the whole camp had heard him and i got up and slowly walked down to get my dinner.

I sat down next to Thomas and Minho, Newt was nowhere to be seen. I wasn’t really hungry, so i just shoved my food from one side of the plate to the other, withoutpaying attention to my surroundings.

“I’m surprised at how calm you are, Y/N” i heard Minho say and i looked up and tilted my head.

“What do you mean? Why shouldn’t i be calm?”

He shrugged and pointed over his shoulder while he stuffed his face with food.  "Maybe because this girl over there flirts with you boyfriend? I don’t know, just a question.“

I followed his finger with my gaze and saw Newt sitting at a table right next to his sister. On is other side i spotted another girl. I couldn’t see her face since they sat with their back to us, but what i could clearly see was that she sat way too close to him. Way too close. She had a hand on his shoulder and pressed her whole side at his while she talked animatedly to him. Also she laughed a tad too loud and much and  sometimes casually twirled a strand of her hair with her finger.

And the worst thing: Newt didn’t seemed to be bothered a bit by her attitude and much rather enjoyed it and laughed a long with her.

This picture filled me with nausea and i shoved my plate away and stood up apruptly.

“I’m not hungry anymore. I’ll go to bed”, i said flatly and quickly walked away.

Thomas P.O.V

Thomas shoved Minho, who almost choked with his mouth full of bread.

“Was this really necessary, Minho? She was fine until you had to make your idiotic comment.”

The black haired boy shrugged . “I just pointed it out. I thought she knew!”

“Whatever. I go talk to her and look if she’s ok.”

With this words Thomas stood up and left Minho with his food, not without throwing a thouthful glance over to Newt. He didn’t understand why he acted like this, because he knew that his friend truly loved Y/N, and it was obvious that he was hurting her with his behavior.

Thomas found Y/N sitting on her usual spot, the rock a bit seperated from the camp, carefully approached her and laid his hand on her slightly  shaking shoulder, which made her turning around to him.

When she recognized him, she immediately tried to wipe the tears from her face, but he softly pushed her hands down and pulled her into a hug. She tensed up, but then started crying and buried her face in her best friend’s shoulder. He held her until she calmed down and then asked concerned: “Are you ok, Y/N?”

She shook her head and asked with a shaky voice: “Do you think he’s cheating on me, Tommy? Am i not good enough for him?”

“No, Y/N, stop thinking like this. Newt loves you and sure as hell isn’t cheating on you. Just talk to him and it’ll be fine. I think he doesn’t even know how much he is hurting you right know. But i promise, it’ll be fine.”

Y/N P.O.V

After my little break down after dinner i sat in Newt’s and my shared tent, waiting for him. This time i wouldn’t be asleep, i wanted to talk to him.

After i almost fell asleepa few times, i finally heard someone approaching the tent; and then Newt carefully opened it and came in. His surprise was obvious, when he realized i was not sleeping.

“Hey, Y/N. Why are you still awake? I told you you don’t have towait for me.”

He laid down next to me and attempted to kiss me, but i turned my head so that he kissed my cheek instead of my lips.

“I want to talk to you, Newt.” I hated how little and vulnerable my voice sounded.

“Is everything alright, love?”, he asked somewhat concerned.

I felt warm spreading in my stomach when he called me ‘love’, but then i remembered what i had planned to do.

“Are you cheating on me, Newt?”, i confronted him, and it sounded harsher than i wanted it to.

He seemed taken aback by my question,and quickly shook his head. “What wouldmakeyou think that? I would never cheat on you! I love you!”

“Really? Because it doesn’t seem like it. For me it looks like you really enjoyed this girl’s presence at the dinner, didn’t mind her flirting with you, in the evening you never come back before i’m asleep and in the mornings you leave before i wake up. I can count on the fingers of my hand how many times we talked since we arrived here, and i’m sick of it! If you don’t want me anymore, just say it, but don’t let me suffer like this!” With every word my voice had raised and the last ones i had screamed at him with tears brimming in my eyes.

Newt stared at me in disbelief and when he spoke, his voice was dangerously low. “And because of that you think i’m cheating on you?! We didn’t talked because you were never by my side, and this girl - she actually supported me in the last few days unlike you, my bloody girlfriend! Because you, my girlfriend, were busy talking to her oh so best friend Thomas the whole day. Don’t think i didn’t saw you two on this rock, all cuddly and doing who knows what! Do you want to know what i think? I think that you cheat on me with Thomas!”

Now he screamed too, fist balled at his side and i had to admit, he scared me, because he had never before screamed at me.

He angrily took his blanket and stood up. “I’m leaving. Goodbye.”

I looked after him, speechless, and then fell back and my blanket with tears rolling down my face.

What had i done?

Now my boyfriend, the only person i truly loved, hated me and thought i would cheat on him with his best friend.

It felt like he had ripped my heart out and left a hole in my chest wtih his words.

I was completely shattered.

▪ ▪ ▪

I had cried myself to sleep after a while without Newt coming back, but i woke up when i heard loud thunder.

There was literally nothing that scared me more than thunder and lightning since we all barely survived this storm in the scorch. I desperately felt for Newt with my hands, as always when i was scared at night, but he wasn’t there.

I remembered our fight and almost started sobbing when i heard another thunder, this time louder.

I clutched my blanket in my hands hard so that my knuckles turned white, while i started shivering and breathing faster.

I could feel that i was getting a panic attack, and when my heart nearly stopped when i heard the thunder again, i decided to search for Newt.

In this moment i didn’t care anymore that we had had the worst fight in our relationship last evening, and that he probably hated me and thought i would be cheating on him, i just wanted to lay down next to him cuddled up in his arms so that the storm wouldn’t hurt me.

I stood up and left the tent, the blanket still tightly pressed against my chest and turned around, frantically thinking where he could be.

I then stumbled over to Thomas tent, and when i opened it, i saw Newt peacefully sleeping under his blanket, his blonde hair tousled, while Thomas was nowhere to be seen.

I just decided to lay down next to him, as close to him as possible without waking him up, when it thundered again, the loudest thunder i had ever heard in my life. I let out a shriek and raised the blanket about my head, trying to shield myself.

Then i suddenly felt a warm hand and my upper arm, and Newt softly pulled me down to him.

“Are you scared, love?”, he asked, concern evident in his eyes.

I nodded, sobbing and he laid his arm around my waist and pulled me close to his warm chest, where i buried my head in his shoulder.

After a few moments, Newt spoke up.

“Y/N…i’m sorry. I’m sorry that i yelled at you and i shouldn’t have said the things i said. I would never cheat on you. I’m so sorry, i love so much, i couldn’t live without you.”

I raised my head, our noses almost touching and wispered: “No Newt, i’m sorry. I was just jealous and didn’t think straight. I shouldn’t have yelled at you. I love you too. ”

Newt sighed in relief and pressed a soft kiss on my forehead.

“You don’t have to be jealous, Y/N. You’re so bloody beautiful, inside and out and i didn’t know what i would do without you and how i even deserved and angel like you, and i could never leave you, because no girl in this universe is nearly as perfect as you.”

I almost started crying again when i heard his words. I had never heard something more sweet and perfect in my whole life.

“Thank you Newt, and you should know that i could never leave you, i love you more than anything else in this universe and i’m so lucky to have you. And i didn’t cuddle with Thomas. He just comforted me after i saw you with this girl.”

“I know, Y/N. He already told me, i guess i was just overreacting and jealous of seeing my best friend so close with my girlfriend. I’m so sorry. I love you.”

I kissed him softly on the lips and then cuddled into his arms, not bothered by the loud thunder anymore.

I’m having trans Keith thoughts that are also kinda sheith. Also most of these are based off of trans men having periods and my own feelings and things I want when I’m on my period. Having periods is rough enough but when you’re a trans guy, the anxiety and self hatred goes up a lot so I had to write these to make me feel a little better.

Shiro using his galra tech hand to help soothe Keith’s period cramps by hearing it up slightly.

Keith sobbing from dysphoria and Shiro just telling Keith all the things he loves about him. Basically sheltering Keith and giving him nothing but positive thoughts and hugs.

Keith sneaking to Shiro’s room while at the garrison to pick up pads since Shiro buys them when he goes shopping.

Shiro still being understanding and/or enthusiastic about going down on Keith during his period to help the pain or the intensity. (Having sex can help periods. I know it’s crazy.)

Shiro letting Keith op out of normal Voltron drills like fighting the gladiator or mind exercises wince when you’re on your period. It’s all you think about. Keith just walks on the treadmill or lifts weights to help stress and anger.

Keith having to take multiple breaks during the day to go change and Shiro protecting Keith when the others get curious.

Keith having to ask Allura about periods and they both come up with a pill that gets rid of Keith’s periods and pregnancy abilities. He’s a happy boy now.

Shiro making Keith a binder since he can sew. When Lance teased Keith about looking feminine Shiro stepped in front of them and got Keith out of the area before he started to sob and breakdown. Lance apologized later.

When Keith is feeling grossed out and sore and achy, Shiro gives him a full body massage and helps Keith relax.

Bonus trans Shiro and trans Keith.
Both of them meeting while Keith wasn’t out yet and Shiro was. Shiro helped Keith find a binder and new clothes. Shiro also carries extra pads and tampons in case the both need them. He also carries meds in case the cramps start hurting. He lets Keith’s advisors know about how he may have to leave class or stay in the dorms. Keith eventually moved to more online core classes and did his actual major study one on one with Shiro since they both respected each other.

Also a fun one that made me happy:
Shiro making a blanket fort around Keith while he’s feeling dysphoria or anxiety to help him relax. They both read and listen to music in the fort until Keith falls asleep.

anonymous asked:

I would love to see Alex and Maggie comforting Kara after Kara gets blown up in a car and watches the person who is confiding in her die just because he's confiding in her.

Alex is her first phone call.

Alex is always her first phone call.

Her shirt is burned through and her jacket smells of gasoline, smells of fire, smells of ash.

Smells of the ash of the man who had just been speaking to her, confiding in her.

Trusting her.

And she failed him.

Failed him, like she failed all the aliens in the bar that night she wasn’t there to stop the massacre.

Failed him, like she failed to save Kelly the night of Myriad, because James and Winn were her friends, and somehow that made their lives more valuable than the life of someone she barely knew but saw every day for two years.

Failed him, like she failed time and time and time again.

So she calls Alex.

She calls Alex, and she can do nothing but sob.

Alex comes to get her, and she’s in DEO gear, and she’s in the DEO van, but that’s not how they’re leaving.

Because Alex isn’t there to pick her up to report for work.

She’s there to take care of her sister.

Of Kara Danvers, Kara Zor-El. Not Supergirl.

Supergirl can be debriefed later.

Kara needs comfort, now.

“I got you,” is all Alex says as Kara falls into her arms, as Alex covers her burnt-through shirt with a pullover sweater as Kara shrugs out of the jacket that smells like her failure, like his death, and then there are sirens, and Maggie is sprinting out of her cop car like a bat out of hell, and Kara dimly assumes that she’s running for Alex, but she’s not, she’s not, because when she grinds to a halt in front of them, it’s Kara’s name that’s on her lips.

“Kara, I am so sorry, are you – are you hurt, I mean, physically? You know it wasn’t your fault, right? The explosion pattern, there wasn’t anything you could have done – “

And Kara breaks, then, because Maggie knows, and Alex knows, exactly what is on her mind.

That a man with a husband and kids and a mother and a father and a best friend from high school is dead.

And it’s her fault.

Maggie knows, and Alex knows, because they’re both experts in blaming themselves for deaths they couldn’t possibly have prevented.

“Sawyer! You gonna get a witness statement or what?” her partner calls, and Maggie tilts her head at her girlfriend’s little sister.

“Do you want to go home, Kara? I can hold off my guys for you if you need to breathe for a while before we – ”

But Kara, still wrapped in Alex’s strong arms, shoots out a hand for Maggie’s wrist.

“I want to go home. But come with us,” she barely whispers, and Alex almost sobs, and Maggie has to fight down tears, and Kara doesn’t even bother, her tears tracking through the ash on her face.

“Come on, you two. I’m gonna get her attended to, I’ll have the statement for you later. Catch a ride back with Taylor, would you?” Maggie calls, and her partner gives a curt nod, and Maggie ushers her Danvers girls into her squad car.

She doesn’t comment when Alex slides into the back seat with Kara instead of riding in the front with Maggie, and she doesn’t comment when instead of buckling up, Kara just lays down on the seat and puts her head in Alex’s lap and lets Alex pet her hair, whisper in her ear, kiss her forehead, hold her steady.

She doesn’t comment. She just drives extra carefully, because she has precious cargo in the back seat.

Alex helps Kara stumble out of the car when they get to her apartment, and Maggie carries Kara’s jacket as Alex half-carries her upstairs.

“It’s my fault,” are Kara’s first words when they step inside.

“I get to live because I can just fly out of there, because nothing’s going to penetrate my skin, but he… he doesn’t even… his family won’t even have a body to…”

“Kara. This… this isn’t your fault. You couldn’t have anticipated it, you couldn’t have known – ”

“Alex, what good am I if my reporting puts people at risk and I can’t even rescue them as Supergirl? How… what good am I, then? Any of it?”

“Kara, listen to me. If you start blaming yourself for things you can’t control? You’re never going stop. Ever. Trust me. I know. You can’t let this get inside you like this. You can’t. This wasn’t your fault.”

“Alex, I’m not a soldier, I don’t – ”

“Hey, Little Danvers, listen, neither am I. Look, you can grieve, Kara, and you can rage and you can mourn, and James told me you used to set up a car next to his heavy bag and have a punching fit, and I can take you out to the garage right now if you need to. But your sister’s right. You start blaming yourself for this, and it’s not gonna stop, and you don’t deserve that. I promise you, you don’t.”

“But I lived. And he died.”

“There’s no shame in surviving, Kara,” Alex whispers, and Kara sobs, and Alex wraps her in her arms, shushing her and soothing her and holding in her own tears because her little sister needs her right now.

Maggie kisses Alex’s forehead and puts a hand on Kara’s shaking shoulder before she stands up and pads into the kitchen.

“Where you going?” Kara mutters from where she’s buried her face in Alex’s polo.

“To order you some potstickers, Kid Danvers.”

Kara sniffs and Alex grins.

“So can I keep her?” she asks, and Kara sniffles and nods.

“You can keep her,” she agrees, and she thinks that maybe, just maybe, if she has big sisters like this, she might be worth something after all.