i want to make it clear that i'm making fun of him with this post

Domestic Klance Headcanons
  • Lance tries as hard as possible to sleep in for as long as possible
  • this is a difficult task considering Keith is an early riser he doesn’t even need an alarm he just naturally wakes up at 7 to work out or whatever
  • one time lance tried to wake up early enough to surprise keith with a birthday breakfast-in-bed, but of course keith didn’t get the message to sleep in and was already awake
  • they made a mess making pancakes and bacon together instead
  • lance is a neat freak. it annoys the crap out of keith because he never had to clean up for anyone else whereas lance’s mother pretty much programmed him to clean up after himself and his little siblings
  • keith affectionately labels these tirades as The Nag™…brace yourselves, The Nag is coming
  • lance can also cook??? he chops vegetables like it’s nothing and keith is alway afraid he’s going to lose a finger at the speed he’s going
  • they couldn’t decide on a color scheme for their room so it’s just a mismatched mess of soft blues and and calm grays and vibrant red and angsty black and it looks awful. but it’s theirs
  • lance convinced keith to do weekly Couple Luxury Night where they did relaxing at-home spa treatment-esque routines. he told keith it’d be fun but really it’s just an excuse for him to pamper his boyfriend and take goofy pictures in face masks and cucumbers
  • lance always fixes keith’s hair before he walks out the door because that boy does not know that bedheads aren’t acceptable. keith always pretends to be annoyed but his favorite thing is feeling lances fingers run through his hair
  • lance got them really into competitive cooking shows and naturally it turned into a heated cooking war between the two. since lance is 1000x better at cooking (keith can barely peel a potato) keith is allowed to distract him by whatever means necessary. lance is extremely susceptible to neck kisses, side tickling, and obnoxious raspberries
  • lance in aprons with flirtatious sayings
  • keith complying with the aprons’ suggestions
  • lance totally has a childhood teddy bear that he still sleeps with with named tigre (as a child he didn’t really have a clear grasp on the difference between bears and tigers). He is now señor tigre, respect the title, and is appalled when keith calls it ratty and old-looking
  • whenever lance is mad at keith he pretends keith isn’t there and complains about him to tigre
  • when keith needs comfort and can’t get any words out, lance lets him hold tigre—he might be old as hell but he is soft—and just talks to him about anything until keith feels better
  • they have matching red and blue mugs with cute lions on them
  • keith sleeps on the left side of the bed, but always manages to roll all the way to lance’s side by the morning
  • keith also has deathgrip when he’s asleep, so lance had to buy him a body pillow for those nights when lance just wants to sprawl out
  • lance taped a fucking picture of his face to the body pillow the first night keith slept with it and the next morning lance was woken abruptly by keith shrieking in terror
  • lance likes to do voices and impressions all the time to keep himself entertained and uses random objects around the house as props. keith’s reactions range from tired-of-your-shit to must-hold-in-laughter, but most of the time keith likes to film him on his phone so he can watch it again later. he says it’s blackmail material but these are keith’s videos of the lance that only he gets to see every day
  • whenever lance decides to fart in front of keith he turns it into a punchline
  • keith would never fart in front of other people because it’s fucking barbaric but he feels comfortable enough to voice his body’s concerns (oh god lance i have to fucking dump pause the tv i can’t miss gordon ramsay ripping this neglectful chef a new asshole)
  • they have a weekly chore chart with shifting roles, except keith can’t do the dishes because sticking his hands under hot water and touching grimy dishes is a nightmare for him
  • keith never likes to walk around barefoot esp in the kitchen, so lance makes it fun by gifting keith with funky socks. his most recent pair has shooting stars with a moon made of cheese at the ankle. (keith unintentionally called them cheesy and lance keeled over) keith is known at work/school as the serious guy with uncharacteristically fun socks
  • lance likes to blast music but when it bothers keith, he turns it down and sings along at a moderate volume, which keith finds comforting
  • lance: KEITH HAVE U SEEN THE THING
  • keith: did u check between the couch cushions
  • it was between the couch cushions
  • they have a codeword for when keith misses a social cue and says something too blunt or rude, that way they can communicate easily in private and when company’s over
  • they also have a word for when lance is doing something annoyingly repetitive that keith can’t deal with
  • lance is superstitious and it’s all pretty humorous, but he never risks going to bed without saying i love you, even if they’re angry at each other. keith doesn’t understand why they need to say it out loud all the time but he knows it makes lance feel better so he doesn’t ask questions
  • some nights they like to sleep outside on the back porch so they can see the stars together, and they make their own constellations
  • when the Bad Thoughts hit lance, keith just stays with him, cradles him, strokes his hair. keith’s blunt honesty is a solace whenever lance splits
  • when lance dissociates, keith finds a simple activity for them to do together to coax him back like watching crap tv or going for a drive with the windows down
  • lance bought this weird porcelain duck cookie jar and every time keith comes into contact with it he stares it down for a good minute out of suspicion and spite
  • if either of them don’t feel like using their voice at any particular time, they bought mini whiteboards with tons of colorful markers
  • keith really likes to doodle?? its not his passion or anything but lance lets him draw on his skin and loves to show off his “new tattoo” to literally anyone
  • keith really wants a cat but lance thinks cats are too boring and moody. lance wants a dog but keith thinks they’re too high-maintenance and overwhelming
  • when they went pet shopping they became unwittingly enamored with a turtle struggling to eat a tomato. it was inspirational, and they named her Rita
  • they probably start a small garden and grow tomatoes for Rita and lance in floppy sun hats and keith digging gleefully into the earth
  • lance naming their gardening hoe keith and promptly running from an angry dirt-covered keith

im dy i ng I could go on about these dorks and their habits

if anyone wants to add anything more please do I'm thirsty for domestic klance fluff

First of all, sorry for the slow responses! I forgot that I had to work a shift today, so I wasn’t around all afternoon. Which didn’t leave much time for me to write, but here I am, so lets do this (until I inevitably disappear to get some sleep)! Also I’ve gotten some very lovely asks but I wanted to write this down before I forgot. I thought of this headcanon while I was working and it’s too damn good not to share:


Alright, this happens at some point after CW but before Thanos shows up. The team (without Bucky, who’s still in Wakanda, working on getting his head cleared) is back in the US, having signed some form of revised accords. Steve is no longer team leader, but otherwise they’ve gotten off fairly easily with little repercussions. The tension between the old and new Avengers is obvious and especially Tony is met with outright hostility. It doesn’t help that Rhodey still isn’t in any shape to join the fights and is rarely around.

One day Clint signs Tony up for a parenting class. It’s another not-nicely-meant joke because of all the criticism Tony’s gotten for letting Peter fight. Only, the thing nobody expected? Tony actually goes. Because apparently he’s just that masochistic (apparently part of him still desperately wants to fix, to work things out between them). It earns him a lot of harsh ridicule, but Tony finishes it all the same.

Thing is, the Team Cap is so busy making fun of him, they don’t even notice when things start changing. Little things. When Steve walks into an argument between Clint and Tony and asks the latter “What have you done now?” disappointedly, Tony doesn’t snap something, get defensive or flee. He says “Have you ever noticed that you’re always immediately assuming I’m the one who has done something?”. It earns him another hurtful comment from Clint, and the incident is forgotten.

Until. Until, one day, during a debrief, Steve snaps. “She’s just a kid, Tony!” he yells when Tony keeps insisting on harder training for Wanda.

There’s a moment of silence, before, “Oh. Really? Does everyone agree with that?”

“You’re still not done catching up, Stark? So much for the futurist,” Clint sneers, and the matter is dropped. Or so it appears.

For the rest of the meeting, Tony is quiet. Thoughtful. In retrospect, they should’ve taken it for the warning it was.

That evening, when Wanda orders a new dress online, FRIDAY dispassionately informs her the transaction is impossible, as the price goes beyond her monthly allowance.

After a fruitless shouting match with the AI, she goes to Steve. Who (after a just as fruitless shouting match) goes to Tony. Who shrugs. “You told me she’s just a kid. Nobody, not even she herself, disagreed. I’m treating her like one.”

Suddenly, M-rated movies are inaccessible whenever Wanda is in the room. Once her curfew is reached, all electric devices go into sleeping modus (unless in case of an emergency of course). Talking with Tony, screaming at Tony, proves to be completely useless. Tony refuses to budge. Repeats lessons from his parenting class, about enforcing rules and teaching children boundaries.

And it doesn’t end there. The entire team is cut off from Tony’s money–Steve has to admit, he’s entitled to that, and maybe the team has gotten a bit too used to throwing Tony’s money around. That’s not the bad part anyways, they all have their own salaries from the government, they can still live. Just maybe a little more limited than before.

But suddenly the services they’ve become accustomed to are cancelled. They have to buy groceries themselves. There is no cleaning crew after Wanda throws a temper tantrum–she has to clean it herself or one of her ‘staunch defenders’, as Tony calls them, has to do it for her. New furniture doesn’t magically appear out of thin air, they have to buy it. And suddenly–suddenly the costs are starting to add up.

There’s a list pinned to the fridge one morning–on paper even–with their chores, going from doing the dishes to the laundry, that rotate every week. Who hasn’t fulfilled his one has to do all the chores the next week. FRIDAY keeps track of it, and barring missions and injuries, there are no exceptions.

Being grounded is an honest to god possibility now, including all electronics, for when they break one of the House Rules. And they are all enforced ruthlessly.

They all try to talk to Tony about it–they aren’t children, they don’t have to put up with this shit, it wasn’t funny to begin with, when is he gonna stop this already–but he remains unmoved.

It’s all “You told me Wanda is a kid,” and “I am allowed to set rules, considering you’re living under my roof. And there really is no excuse for breaking them, you are all aware they exist and why. They’re reasonable and you know it.”

And the most damning of them all. “If you’re so grown up and independent, you know where the door is. Walk out. This isn’t a prison, and you’re always welcome back, provided that you’re following the rules. You can walk away any time you want.”

Suffice to say, Clint is getting a lot of shit for signing Tony up for that parenting class. (Tony tells him he really appreciates it because clear communication is important.)

To Be Alone - A Moriel Fic

For @acotarshipweek  moriel week which was…sixteen centuries ago, I am aware, but the prompt came from there so credit where credit’s due. Speaking of credit, blessings upon my dearest, @pterodactylichexameter for betaing/general encouragement with this thing, ‘twas a pain at times. 

Title: To Be Alone 

Summary: moriel sin week prompt: secret rendezvous. Mor and Az find themselves alone in a quiet corner of Velaris, having been each told to meet someone important here, not knowing they were being set-up. Little does their High Lady know they’ve already been in a relationship for some months now. They decide to make the most of this time alone they’ve been given and slip off together to a nearby inn… 

Teaser: She hadn’t thought it possible – that she could want him more once he was hers but…From that first brush of his tongue against hers, that first taste of him, she had known that she would never belong to another heart again. She was his. She had always been his, really. As he had always been hers. She had known she would never want anyone else – and that she would never stop wanting him. 

Link: AO3

Mor sucks in a deep breath as she steps from the whisper of darkness winnowing always envelopes her in. It’s near sunset and the streets of Velaris are busy, full of people heading home for their evening meals before the city comes alive for true when night falls. She smiles politely and nods greetings to a few of those who meet her eyes but she doesn’t linger to chat with anyone this time. She’s already a little late for her appointment.

The crowds fortunately start to thin as she heads towards the quieter, more residential area of town near the river. It’s much less densely populated and a faint kiss of mist cools her flushed, warm skin as she emerges from the hot press of bodies. Through the shifting eddies of swirling white she sees the bridge over the Sidra she was asked to come to and hurries her steps when she dimly spots a solitary figure waiting for her – a column of shadow among the white river ghosts.

Mor is within spitting distance before she realises that the person waiting for her is not the one she had expected. Old instincts, sharpened by the recent war, have her reaching for her power, gathering it in her body, preparing to attack or defend- But a heartbeat later she recognises the person and her defences shatter on instinct.

Azriel stands with perfect stillness, leaning on the stone wall of the bridge a calm, tranquil expression upon his handsome features. He doesn’t turn towards her, shift his position at all, or give any other outward reaction to her presence. Mor isn’t fooled. He knows perfectly well that she’s there. For one thing she had seen the shadow curling around his ear moments earlier, informing him that she was – though Mor suspects he had known even before that. The damn male is impossible to sneak up on; unless he lets her, which is frankly just insulting.

Approaching him with long, easy strides, Mor mirrors his unconcerned posture, standing beside him and letting her gaze drift out over the Sidra as well, following his gaze. She manages a full, impressive, ten seconds before her restraint cracks. Az smiles thinly, fondly, as the words burst from her, interrupting the peaceful silence, “What are you doing here?”

At last Ariel tears his gaze away from the view in front of them to look down at her. His face softens as his eyes meet hers, the mask of cold composure that some, wrongly, assume is a permanent feature of her shadowsinger slips. His quiet affection shows through instead, that tender smile lingering on his lips. The shadows that twist around him thin then vanish, as though giving them privacy. Her belly swoops with the usual familiar pulse of pleasure and joy that he feels safe with her, safe enough to let his instinctive guard down.

Az’s voice is its typical dark, velvet calm when he answers her, “I was told to urgently meet an informant here and was advised that the meeting would be…” his lips curl into a tighter smile, his eyes tinged with obvious amusement as he looks her up and down, appreciating her even though she’s dressed rather simply, “Advantageous to me.”

“By?” Mor prompts him, eyebrows quirking up.

Az’s smile deepens before he answers, “Feyre.”

Mor looses a short burst of laughter at that. Theory confirmed. Az only widens his eyes quizzically, inviting her to explain her reacting.  

Composing herself enough to answer Mor drums her fingers thoughtfully on the top of the stone wall before she tells Az, through a broad grin, “Our esteemed High Lady asked me to meet her here at this time for something very important.” Her smirk broadens, now edged with wicked glee as she jostles Az playfully with her shoulder. “Seems like you’re ‘very important’, Az.”

As she had hoped this teases a faint flush of pink into his tan cheeks and her grin broadens in answer. Then his brow furrows and he clears  his throat and says, with a very good impression of his usual cool, analytical seriousness that’s only given away to her by how his hazel eyes glitter with merriment, “Looks like she thinks we should be spending some more quality time alone together. “

A soft shiver rustles through her as his gaze meets hers. Heat coils low in her stomach but she ignores it, pushing it down hard. Opting for airy amusement instead she says pointedly, “In a very romantic location.” She gestures around them, to the thin veil of mist enveloping them, adding an additional layer of intimacy to the meeting. The Sirda flows beneath them, gilded by the slowly setting sun, burning like liquid gold with diamonds peppering the smooth water, sparkling like stars.

Velaris is beautiful as it draws near to the night it so enjoys and it’s known, comfortable and familiar to both of them. The location is perfect – a little too perfect – and Feyre’s motives aren’t particularly difficult to guess at. Mor hopes Az never tries to recruit her for any further spying or subterfuge; if this is any indication she won’t get on well with it. Still…

She turns back to Az, her voice dropping, a hint of silk brushing through her words, “I’m not going to argue with her.”

Conversely to her hopeful expectations, Az’s frown only deepens into lines of uncertainty. “Do you think we should tell her?” he asks, his fingers trailing, apparently unconsciously, over the hand she has resting on the bridge.

Keep reading

One Moment (Day 3: Secret Admirer)

For @carryon-valentines

Summary: Another gosh darn soulmate AU. 

Word count: 1412

Warnings: This is hella angsty. People are punched. Baz is sad. It’s gr8 


I’m not even going to pretend I don’t know it. Simon Snow is beautiful. He’s kind. He’s a fucking mess. And he’s my soulmate.

I couldn’t be sure until I touched him, but I didn’t want to be sure. I lasted seven years without touching him, because I was afraid to touch. I was afraid of my feelings for him being real. Simon Snow already occupied my mind day and night even in black and white; he was my obsession. I was afraid that if I ever touched him, if I ever figured out what color his eyes really were, it would drive me insane.

In the beginning of our time as roommates, Simon and I acted civil toward each other, but everything changed during fifth year. That year, I started to think about what color Simon’s lips were. That year, I started to wonder why Wellbelove wanted to kiss him when his lips were always so chapped. That year, I started to wonder what his chapped lips would feel like against mine. Actually, I didn’t start wondering about that during fifth year. I simply figured out why I was wondering it in the first place.

The realization came one evening over dinner. He was sitting with his friends, and I was sitting with mine. It was all very normal. It was normal to see Wellbelove smiling at Simon; and it was normal to see Simon smiling back. The pang of jealousy I felt, however, was not normal. It had finally hit me.

That evening, I stayed in the catacombs later than usual. I drained a few extra rats, and tried not to cry. I tried not to cry over the fact that I was in love with Simon Snow.

When I finally made my way back to the room, Simon had already taken his shirt off and begun climbing into bed. He mumbled his usual, “G’night, Baz.”

Instead of my usual hum of acknowledgement, I replied with, “Oh, piss off, Snow.”

I remember him turning and looking at me like I had just spat in his face, before I turned and entered the bathroom. I made sure to slam the door behind me.  

My father could deal with the fact that I was a vampire. He could accept me even though I am not exactly alive. But my father would never accept me if he knew my soulmate was the Mage’s heir. So, I didn’t want to accept it either.

From then on, I made it my mission to make sure Simon Snow wanted nothing to do with me. I insulted him. I embarrassed him. I flirted with Wellbelove. Crowley, I even pushed him down the stairs! Unfortunately, my plans backfired. From then on, Simon wouldn’t leave me alone. Everyday he’d wake up and follow me around the school grounds, making sure I didn’t “cause any trouble.” Sometimes, I thought that he was more obsessed me, than I was with him. But that was impossible.

There were so many times that Simon almost touched me. Each time, I’d pull away from him right before our skin could make contact and feign disgust. Each time, through the filter of gray that clouded our eyes, I saw a little piece of Simon break. That little piece did more to me than I ever wanted to admit. Still, I kept on pushing him away. I kept trying to make him despise me. I never pushed him completely over the edge though. One of us would always storm off, before I got the chance. That was until one day in seventh year.

It started off like any other day, and it ended like any other day: with me coming back from the catacombs at a ridiculous hour, and Simon pretending like he was asleep (like he wasn’t waiting for me to return). Everything was normal, until Simon sat up.

“Back from draining a first year?” he asked. I rolled my eyes, as I gathered my things and prepared to change into my pajamas. Simon persisted. “I know you’re a vampire.”

I sighed before before replying, “Of course, Snow. I’m also the bloody queen.” I didn’t turn to look at him. I just listened to his bed creak as he stood up.

“So, you don’t deny it?” he asked. I turned to him. “Ever heard of sarcasm, Snow?” I scoffed as I continued, “I figured you of all people could take a joke, considering you are one.”

Simon glared at me. “What?”

I sneered. “Did I stutter?”  

Simon growled, “Baz, listen–”

“No, Snow, you listen to me,” I interrupted. “I’m as much of a vampire as you are the chosen one.”

Simon scrunched up his nose. I smirked. “Let me make this clear, in case you’re too dumb to figure it out on your own. I’m not a vampire, and you’re not the chosen one.”

I watched Simon and pretended his frustration was amusing me. He clenched his fists and gnashed his teeth. I could tell he was trying, and failing, to keep calm. It hurt to watch. I pushed farther. “Everyone may think you are,” I spat, “but I know that there’s no way in hell that an idiot like you could ever be the chosen one.” I could tell he was almost there. That’s when I told him, “I bet The Mage knows it, too. You’re not the chosen one. You were just a tool. His ticket to becoming headmaster–”

That’s when I felt it. His fist against my cheek. It impacted harder than I expected. I gasped as I held my face. The inside of my cheek had been sliced open on one of my teeth, and blood drooled out of my mouth onto the floor. At first, I didn’t notice it. It was dark, and I was in pain. But on the always white carpet, next to my alway black shoes, I saw a hint of red.

I didn’t have to look at him to know that he was gaping at me like an idiot. I didn’t want to look at him. I was afraid. I hadn’t been that afraid in a long time, because I knew when I looked up my whole world was going to change. So, we stood in silence, while I worked up the courage, as my eyes filled with tears.

I prayed that Simon would want nothing to do with me afterwards. That I could keep pretending I wasn’t in love with him. That everything would stay the same. But, when I looked up at him, nothing was the same.

I was no stranger to building walls around my heart. It’s much easier to push everyone away than to risk getting your heart broken. Over time, though, my walls had begun to deteriorate, and looking into Simon’s eyes was one final blow that sent my walls crashing down around me. And as the walls fell, tears began streaming down my face. That’s when another realization hit me: I didn’t want to pretend not to love Simon Snow, because I did love him. I loved him so much. I thought it would kill me, before I got the chance to tell him just how much.

It’s strange to think about how much changed in just one moment. Before that moment, only three things mattered to me: 1) I didn’t want Simon Snow to be my soulmate, 2) he was my soulmate anyway, and 3) that I never wanted him to know we were soulmates.

As I stood, crying, staring into his eyes, none of it seemed to matter anymore. What mattered was how gently he was touching my face, how he was wiping away my tears instead of making fun of me for them, how he was closing his eyes and leaning into me, and then how he was kissing me.

It wasn’t the kind kissing that haunted my dreams at night; it wasn’t violent or painful. It was soft and full of all the kind words that I wish I had said to him since we first met.

After Simon pulled his lips away from mine, he whispered something I had never imagined, not even in my wildest fantasies. He whispered something that came as more of a shock than Simon Snow standing shirtless in our room snogging me.

“I love you, Baz… since first year, I think.”

Our first kiss was full of remorse, but our second was full of promise.

I love him so much.

anonymous asked:

so excited to see the hcs! i'm so glad you enjoyed kingsglaive <3

BOY THAT MOVIE WAS A TRIP I TELL YOU HWAT! 

So!!! To be completely honest, I kinda balked at the thought of compiling headcanons for Nyx. I doubted I would be able to come up with anything worth documenting and posting on the web…. 

But then I sat down and typed out 1k worth of headcanons in the hour before I had to get up and get out the door for work. Guys, Nyx is a ton of fun. Expect more content from me, because he and my muse are drinking buddies now.  

Anyway, you know the deal:

More under the cut for NSFW content.  


Keep reading

Top 10 reactions to Dean and Cas’ profound bond.

10. Nora, Cas’ boss in ‘’Heaven Can’t Wait’’.

Well this was akward, I really think she didn’t want anything with Steve from the beggining. Cas isn’t usually someone we see flirting and probably he didn’t do it with Nora so she maybe believed he was gay, Dean’s arrival and the way this two seemed to be a couple who had had a fight just only convinced her.

Originally posted by pondlifeforme

And what kind of boss was her? I mean, Cas was always working a lot and she wanted him to take care of her baby. Someone call a labour inspector.

9. You can’t spell subtext without S-E-X.

The episode was gold, but imagine if Cas had been in it. At least we will always have the moment when Jensen Ackles stared directly in our souls:

Originally posted by feandra

Fourth Wall, what Fourth Wall?

8. The monsters in Purgatory.

‘’Three days’ journey. Follow the stream. There’s a clearing. You’ll find your angel there.’’ Your angel. Not only heaven and hell know, purgatory knows too.

Originally posted by literarycasualty

And  I’m sure Benny was pretty confused when after a year of looking for Castiel we didn’t get a kiss, I bet Benny heard Dean praying to Cas, everynight.

Originally posted by qveenofmoons

He knew.

7.Balthazar.

‘’Sorry you have me confused with that other angel. You know the one in the dirty trench coat who is in love with you.’’ 

This is important, not only because it is so obvious everyone have noticed but because Balthazar was supposed to be one of the angels who knew Cas, they were friends.

Originally posted by supermerwholocked2893

6. The use of the word weakness.

We have seen three diferents angels using this word to talk about Dean and Cas relationship: Uriel, Metatron and Isham. Feeelings are a weakness, and when it comes to destiel there are a lot of them, they are a weakness because you don’t listen to your brain, you make mistakes and your priorites change. 

When we met Castiel he is one angel more, a perfect engine without feelings, but he meets Dean and all change, and he starts to feel, to have doubts and he changes and for his brothers he is just weak, because he will give his life to save one human.

‘’And then, after a rousing speech, his true weakness is revealed.

Originally posted by destielette

with Dean Winchester’’

5. Mary.

I don’t think these face needs any explication:

Originally posted by annalisasparkleshine

Interesting.

4. The church scene in season 11:

First we have this, totally unnecesary, moment when Lucifer screams at Dean making fun of his despair. 

Originally posted by driverpicksthemuusic

I say it was unnecesary because Lucifer was in Castiel’ s head and he knew how much they care for each other.

Second we have Amara, we can agree that she was very surprised when Dean, despite the atraction between them just focus on Cas instead of her.

3. Cain.

Because he was the one who literally threw the parallel between Castiel and Colette to our faces and I have to say, I can’t believe he met Dean and Cas and saw they had the same relationship he had with the love of his life.

Originally posted by inacatastrophicmind

Vanessa is out.

2. Isham.

We are talking a lot about 12x10 but i think we can talk a little bit more because what this angel did was simply compare himself and he was in love with a human with Castiel. For Isham they had the same weakness, their love for a mortal.

Originally posted by destielonfire

And of course, he knew this love goes both ways.

Before reaching number the most honorable mention of them all:

Us, destiel shippers of the world.

Because we have sold our soul for this two, and this what a day in our lifes looks like now:

Originally posted by yourreactiongifs

Originally posted by stydiaislovestydiaislife

Originally posted by perpetuallrh

I love you guys.

And finally the moment we were all waiting for:

1. Sam.

Because if I love something in this world are all this moments when Cas and Dean are busy looking at each other and the camera shows us a very uncomfortable Sam.

Because Sam knows and sometimes he makes fun of it:

Originally posted by dean-dontobjectifyme-winchester

But he also worries about his brothers and just want this old married couple to be happy.

Originally posted by paininthecasbutt


Message me if you think I missed something important!

myurlisgone  asked:

Hey! I found your blog a few weeks ago and I absolutely love it! Your writing is so amazing, it catches aaaaalll of my attention (and I usually get distracted while reading). You have inspired me to write again (It's been 2-3 years), thank you so much! I'm looking forward to read anything you write next! May I request how the guys would have confessed to Candy? (Let's pretend episode 28 never happened). XOXO

I think it was obvious the boys would have definitely kissed Candy earlier on their picnic outing with her…if only Iris and Thomas hadn’t shown up at the park. Oh well. Let’s think of some other possible scenarios. And just in time for Valentine’s Day!

Nathaniel: We (our Candy) overheard Nathaniel conversing with another character (I can’t remember who) about how he also enjoys reading poetry when he’s not nose deep in a good detective novel. I think, given the opportunity he would have still confessed in the library, but would have perhaps slipped a note in Candy’s locker saying to meet him after school there. Once everyone else had left and it was just the two of them, he would perhaps use the excuse that he was looking for a poem to use for a project and wanted her help. After going through several books, he would finally reach for the one he already planned to grab and flipped it open to the poem he wanted. He would show it to Candy and ask what she thought, watching her eyes light up and a soft smile form on her lips as she read it. She would express how it was just lovely and he should use it for his project for sure. Then he would confess to Candy that it was actually one of his favorites…because it reminded him of her. Candy would take a second to register what he had just said to her, moved by his confession and relieved as she liked him too. And then they would share a passionate kiss.

Castiel: Castiel is not really the romantic type, though he has his better moments around Candy. His favorite thing to do seems to be walking Candy home when he has a chance, even though she lives the opposite direction of where he lives. Castiel has even invited her out with him while he walks Demon. A perfect opportunity for more one on one time together. So one day, after school, he would find Candy and offer to walk her home again. Thankfully she accepted. As they approached the park, he stopped her and offers to buy her a drink while they just hang out for a bit, promising he’ll get her something besides water this time. Candy is skeptical of him so nice, wondering when the sarcasm was going to show up, but accepts this offer nonetheless. They end up having a good time, laughing, joking and poking fun at each other. It starts to get a bit late as they lose track of time and Castiel keeps his promise to walk Candy home, but this time holding hand the rest of the way. As they pass through the park, he stops at the park gate near her home and gives her a genuine smile as he admits he had fun hanging out out with her. It was never boring and he always looked forward to it. She would blush, not sure how to respond. And then he would lean in for a kiss, to which she kissed back.

Lysander: Someone had posted screen caps of Lysander from the earlier episodes and Candy asking if she could ever have the chance to read or see his work/song lyrics, since he wrote such a beautiful poem for Rosa on behalf of Leigh. He mentions how one day maybe he would show her. I agree that this probably would have been the way he would have confessed to Candy. They would be hanging out by the fountain like they did while studying together that one episode and having a nice conversation, or just people watching and enjoying each others company in silent bliss. Lysander would look at Candy while she wasn’t paying attention and would smile as he pulled out his journal (for once he had it on him), and would start writing in it. Candy would notice that he seemed hard at work and would leave him him be for a bit before he spoke up. Lysander would remind her of when he said he would show her some of his work one day, to which she would nod eagerly. He would pass her his journal and let her read a few pages before flipping to the page he had just written on, confessing his feelings for her, and how she has been his biggest inspiration while writing song lyrics lately. Candy would look at him, stunned, as he patiently waited for her response. She would hug his journal to her chest, wanting to keep it close to her heart before they share a tender kiss.

Kentin: Kentin feels like his feelings for Candy are obvious and transparent, but he still needs conformation from her that she likes him to the same extent. He would invite her out on another picnic, hoping no one would bother them this time. So instead of going to the park, they went on a nature trail. The would find a nice open clearing with fresh grass, tress for shade, a few wild flowers here and there and a small creek. They would set up the blanket and enjoy a few sandwiches and some fruit like last time and then lie down to watch the clouds and point out shapes while reminiscing over their childhood. As Candy continued to look at the clouds, Kentin would excuse himself for a minute, promising to come right back. While gone, he would be a little off in the distance, picking a few wild flowers to make a small bouquet. When he returned, he would hold behind his back and make her close her eyes. Candy would sit up and humor him, curious. Then he would tell her to open them to see the flowers. She would be touched by his gesture, thinking it was very much him. She would happily take them while he took one flower and put it in her hair, saying she was prettier than any flower in existence. She would press her forehead against his and they would kiss.

Armin: These feelings are very new to Armin, so he wasn’t quite sure what to do to confess to Candy that he liked her…a lot. What to do, what to do….the only thing he could turn to for references or examples of what to do was the internet and a bunch of chick flicks and romantic comedy movies. He liked the ones from the 80′s so he began some extensive research. He didn’t have a car like Jake in 16 Candles, nor did he know anyone with such a car. He didn’t have a boombox to blare a song outside Candy’s bedroom window. Eventually he would come up with a plan B. He would start up a conversation with Candy about RomComs and eventually ask her what her favorite one was and why. After he got her answer, he would put in a bit of effort to reenact her favorite scene (which turned out to be a fun but genuine confession) from the movie she talked about, to win her over. This would all take place after school when everyone else was gone. Candy was the only audience that mattered for this. She would be slightly embarrassed and on the verge of getting misty eyed by his efforts, but above all she would smile so brightly as Armin took her in his arms and embraced her before giving her a kiss full of determination.

I Want You to Show Me the Way

Pairing- readerxTaehyungxYoongi

Rating- M (smut, but it’s fluffy smut)

Word count- 3.8k

Taehyung is a bit inexperienced when it comes to girls so he enlists the help of Yoongi and his girlfriend to learn some tips, to which they kindly oblige.

Includes: fingering, oral, sex. M/F only, no M/M just fyi.

This is my first long-ish oneshot for bts and my first serious smut. Be kind, or nah idc. 

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

According to that article, Harry and his band started to record and then he decided they need to be free from distractions and went to Jamaica. What a lovely place to write and record while still having fun getting drunk and partying (he made a point to mention it). But it wasn't compulsory that he recorded in Jamaica. This is when Louis and his family was facing a really hard time. It's just hard for me to justify that if they were as supportive of each other as fandom makes them out to be.

Anon, meet your name Anon Friend who also messaged about that post:

Thank you! The Jamaica thing drives me crazy. Hearing about those fun rom-con marathons and drunken nights of swimming in dresses frustrates me so much given that Joannah was in the hospital terminally ill at the time. Louis adored his mom and i can’t imagine the stress of that situation, the secrecy, maintaining stunts, his family. Why the hell aren’t people more concerned with Harry being in the UK to support Louis? Why?

Anons, let’s talk.

First off, I want to state I am not talking about the actual Harry and Louis. I am not making assumptions about how often Louis was in the UK with Harry, whether or not Louis needed a break or a vacation from handling Jay’s illness, or how often Louis was in Jamaica with Harry. I am not making assumptions or guesses or head canons about what the real!Harry and real!Louis did.

Second, this topic really hits close to home right now for me. I have a family member who has been in the hospital for 70 days straight as of today. My brother and I are the only ones around to take care of him. He’s going to be fine, eventually (probably and mostly), but we were told to start considering end of life decisions when he was still unconscious. It’s been a very bumpy, long road.

I am not in Louis’ situation. I understand that. I am not trying to say I understand what he went through–hell no. What I am saying is that I have needed my spouse. Beyond that, I have needed my friends in grad school–people I have only met in the last few months have let me cry on their shoulders (literally). I have had friends help me keep up with assignments and readings. I have needed grace from colleagues. I have had needed fandom friends to help distract me. I have needed my brother. And yes, sometimes I have needed to ignore it all, to avoid the hospital, to negotiate visits with my brother so we can spread them out and take some breaks, live our lives, go laugh at a movie.

What pisses me off is that there are people in this fandom trying to line up dates Harry and Louis weren’t seen as “proof” Louis was in Jamaica. I have seen multiple posts and head canons and analysis of the word “we,” all of them trying to prove that Louis spent a ton of time in Jamaica “supporting” Harry.

And maybe Louis did. Maybe he needed that. There is no judgement here, because anyone knows that people need a break from the hospital, from the draining day-to-day of it. Hell, maybe Jay was still well enough then that Louis didn’t necessarily need Harry’s in-country support. Or maybe Louis had fallen into a routine. I have no idea, and I don’t even rally care. I’m not judging where Louis or Harry actually were.

What I am judging is this fandom and the fact that I haven’t seen people trying to prove that Harry was lying about being in Jamaica. I haven’t seen people trying to prove that Harry was in the UK supporting Louis during any of that time.

I would love for someone to tell me why the fuck it’s a sexy head canon that Louis “supported” Harry in Jamaica, but there is no sexy head canon about Harry supporting Louis while Jay was sick?

Is it because we talk about sex on the beach, but not sitting in silence behind a curtain, listening to someone’s lungs rise and fall with the help of a tube shoved down their throat? Is it because getting drunk and high and writing fake-deep lyrics is a better way to spend a late night than dreading a phone call and wondering if you’re going to need your partner to drive you to the hospital in the middle of the night in an emergency?

I often say I don’t know anything and I try not to make declarative statements, but fuck that right now. Let’s be clear: If there was someone in that couple who needed “support” while Harry was–we are supposed to believe–getting drunk in drag with a whole support crew of people in Jamaica, it was not Harry.

And the fact that the fandom created and reblogged posts implying otherwise is massively fucked up.

Food for Thought Friday

I prefer to stay quiet when it comes to YOI for a number of reasons. The main reason is that Yuri!!! on Ice is one series I don’t want to overthink (or even analyze at all, strange as it sounds). It’s one of the few that I can just kick back and enjoy for no particular reason. 

Still, I had a thought the other day about that scene toward the end of episode 12, when Viktor asks Yuri if he can think of anything that “might excite” him. 

Note: I don’t mean for this to be any kind of controversial or concrete concept. It’s just a thought that I’ve had in the back of my mind for a few days, and I thought I’d share.

(I’ll also ask readers to please refrain from adding any kind of overtly sexual commentary to this post. Please respect that this is written with a very deliberate approach in mind).

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Hey Hey! So any tips on how to write Levi in fanfiction as close to cannon as possible without ruining his prominent characteristics? I'm in the process of creating a fic that is Levi centric and honestly I'm slightly paranoid of the whole thing ;_;

Ahh this is a complicated question with a complicated answer lol. 

There are three things I think can most definitely help you out when it comes to keeping Levi as close to his canon personality as possible while writing him in a fanfic which contains scenarios that we would never actually see happen in canon. 

Number one being murder 90% of the FANon character tropes you think of when it comes to Levi in fanfic with fire. Try not to go overboard when it comes to those. Certain canon tropes need to be present, like his preference for extreme cleanliness and his insomnia bouts but, a lot of his tropes you can forfeit. Examples being:

  • “Tch. Brat.”
  • “Shitty Brat”
  • Basically overusing “Brat.”
  • Making him out to be a total asshole
  • Making him out to be an abusive POS who kicks puppies in his free time
  • Portraying him as overly angry

Things of this nature. I have seen this done WAYYYYYY too many times, and truthfully, it’s really not accurate to his character. Sure, him saying brat happens in the manga like, maybe three times but, don’t turn it into an overly used pet name. I promise you’ll throw 90% of your readers off if you do. 

Number two is when you write Levi, Keep his dialogue pretty blunt and to the point or round-about and vague DEPENDING ON WHAT HE IS TALKING ABOUT AND HOW FAR INTO THE FIC YOU ARE WITH HIS DEVELOPEMENT. Case in point:

  • Witty comback - Blunt
  • Expressing feelings - Vague
  • Response to a basic question - Blunt
  • Response to an insanely personal question - Vague
  • Insults - Blunt
  • Compliments - Vague and hard to understand

Obviously you should evolve this as the story moves but, just try to keep the flow natural. Also, when it comes to vague responses, try to write his body language in express detail. Don’t go overboard with this either because if you do, you can end up making your story a bit boring to read. Simply add sensory details that help emphasize what Levi is thinking, trying to say, etc. Plus, try to write his thoughts as well. I’m going to take a exert from one of my fics here to use as an example:

Levi sighed heavily. Pinching the bridge of his nose and squeezing his eyes shut tightly while muttering a quiet curse under his breath. Now it was your turn to be baffled. Did he honestly not remember meeting Mike more than once? Or was he putting on a show? Lying to you yet again and keeping whatever secrets he did have close to his chest. The thought put you even more on edge. Though, you’d be lying if you said you weren’t idling on the fence with your stance on the matter. If Levi really was putting on a show, it was an Oscar winning performance. He was more than a little convincing and knowing Levi as well as you think you did; you were pretty sure he was a shitty liar.

“How in the hell could you forget meeting Mike more than once?! The man is 6'5 and built like a brick shit house. He may not talk a lot but, he’s next to impossible to forget.”

Levi sighed again. Opening his eyes to look at you in mild defeat while lifting his hands and shrugging his shoulders as his only form of an answer. It was clear he was just as frustrated by it as you, but it was also quite clear that Levi had an idea as to why and how that would be possible. The bob of his adam’s apple as he swallowed hard and the tapping of his fingers against his knee spoke loud enough for you to register that much. He wanted to tell you something but, he didn’t at the same time. All of this secrecy was getting on your last nerve.

The small details in his body language can really add emphasis on what he’s feeling and so on. I understand that this can be hard to do in a lot of situations involving him as a character but, the more you practice; the easier it becomes. Plus, it definitely helps keep him in character considering he is one to use body language more than words and dialogue for him can be a BITCHHHHHH to write. Writing details like this can definitely save you a lot of headache when trying to figure out what he’d say because a lot of the time; he wouldn’t actually say much.

The third thing is, if you get hung up trying to think of how Levi would react, speak, carry himself, etc, in a certain situation and for the life of you, you cannot figure it out; REREAD MANGA CHAPTERS WITH HIM IN THEM OR REWATCH ANIME SCENES WITH HIM PRESENT. 

It helps, I promise. Specifically pay attention to him. See his expressions and the way his speaks to people in canon situations and then try to morph it or see if it relates in anyway to what you are trying to portray. I cannot tell you how many times this has point blank revived entire chapters for me that I almost gave up on and rewrote. 

And finally, if you ever get to a point in your fic where you want an outside opinion; HIT ME UP I WILL HAPPILY READ IT AND GIVE YOU FEEDBACK :) 

I hope this helps even just a little bit, anon. Happy writing and good luck to you. I know how hard Levi is to write but, he is also sooooooo much fun to write too.

anonymous asked:

Hiii !!!can you make one of those posts that come in topics (idk how to explain OMG) about how would it be to date Hoshi and you are a really hardcore Shawol like he is(maybe more hehe)?I'm sorry this is not very clear but how things would be, like would he freak out with you when Taemin is doing a comeback? And stuff like this

Hi, and so sorry it took us a million years to do this! Hope you like it ;u; 💕I tried


  • you’d honestly probably meet at a Shinee concert
  • like, you’d be queuing for merch and he’d be standing behind you, but you don’t really notice him before you’ve gotten your merch, including each member’s poster, and hear an upset “Ah, Taemin’s poster just got sold out? Well, then…”
  • you look at the pile of posters you’re carrying and get closer to the guy, who looks at you with a quirked eyebrow as he’s still trying to figure out what to buy instead
  • “I can sell you Taemin’s poster,” you offer and laugh a little when his face lights up, and he makes sure you’re serious before just settling for some of the photo sets and other merchandise
  • while he gets you the money for the poster, you talk about Shinee and find out your seats are next to each other
  • and that if anything is what eventually leads to the two of you getting closer
  • there’s just something about listening to and watching Shinee perform Close the door, wave your light sticks slowly along to it and accidentally bump your hand into his
  • when that happens, both of you just smile at each other, but there’s also a jolt of electricity running through your bodies
  • and when the concert is over and you’re both already missing Shinee, he casually asks you, “When will we see again?”
  • his question would be sudden and you’d be surprised for a while, but eventually gather yourself enough to give him a date and you exchange numbers and all that
  • you only realize at home that he was, in fact, Kwon Soonyoung of Seventeen, and not just your casual Shinee fanboy
  • you’ve just realized that when your phone buzzes with a message
  • ‘I’m Kwon Soonyoung `u´ I look forward to talking more about Shinee with you!!’
  • after that you get a photo of the Taemin poster you had been kind enough to sell him, already put on the wall
  • ‘Oh, and thank you for this. I’ll treat you out for coffee for this!!’
  • you insist that it’s fine since he already paid for the poster, but he refuses to give up, and eventually you go out for coffee
  • and a few days later for another coffee
  • and then some dinner, lunch, and so on, and before long you both hold warm feelings towards each other
  • neither of you would forget the day you became an official couple
  • you were at a café and Shinee’s View was playing, and somewhere near the middle you were both just lost staring into each other’s eyes with small smiles playing on your lips
  • “Do you want to go out with me?”
  • you’d ask the question at the exact same time and burst out into laughter right afterwards
  • “I guess that answers the question,” you’d laugh, and Soonyoung agrees with a happy smile and slowly reaches for your hand
  • NOW to the present
  • dating Soonyoung in general would be a whole lot of fun, and when you add to that that the two of you are Shawols… it only gets more fun
  • you’d always try to go to concerts together, and whenever a new song comes out, you’re both very excited and spam each other about your feelings without a second thought
  • and that’s okay because you’re both so excited
  • there’d be lots of cuddles and having his arms around you, especially when you’re both relaxing
  • besides Carats and the other members, he’d get a lot of his strength and motivation from you, and would always feel a sense of healing whenever he’s with you
  • you’d also be one of the reasons he wants to be as cool as possible on stage, because he knows you’ll see it
  • THE CUTEST COUPLE PICS
  • like both in general he’d love taking photos with you, like the type that you see in cute moodboards and all, of you cuddling and doing things together
  • but also cute couple pics of you being the Shawols you are, holding your light sticks or albums etc when it’s near comeback/concert time
  • (great Shawol selca day material)
  • also lots of teasing
  • you know the loving kind where he’d poke your cheek or vice versa and tease you about something
  • somehow it almost always ends with cute, small kisses and both of you laughing
  • and jokes
  • you’d never get bored with him
  • some of that might be because due to his idol career you don’t exactly get to spend so much time together that you’d grow tired of each other
  • instead, the two of you value any and all time that you can spend together and keep in touch through your phones etc
  • but even so, he’s just very fun to be around and you play a big role in that, too
  • the first time he’d tell you he loves you would be during a Shinee-themed sleepover that you’ve spent just enjoying each other’s company, watching their concert DVDs and all that, and somewhere in the middle he just looks at you warmly and says, “I love you.”
  • when you turn to look at him he blushes and averts his gaze with a soft chuckle and mumbles, “I just wanted to put that out there.”
  • your heart would flutter because you’d felt that way for a while, too
  • also good morning and good night texts are a must
  • even if you’d have just had a disagreement, you’d be certain to get a “good night baby, I love you” message 
  • especially during promotion periods when you can barely see at all, Soonyoung would occasionally give you a surprise video call
  • as soon as you answer it, you’re met with his pouty face, and pretty close, too
  • “I missed you,” he mumbles, and when you smile at him, his pout turns into a smile, too
  • you’d talk for a while, about whatever comes to your minds, and eventually wish each other a good night
  • and since both of you are Shawols
  • all the inside jokes related to Shinee
  • and inside jokes in general, really - most Seventeen members feel like third wheels around the two of you, but you can’t help it, you just match that well
  • chances are you’d occasionally also dance together, try out some new moves and even come up with some for Seventeen
  • and when you both run out of inspiration…
  • “Wanna dance to Ring ding dong?”
  • “…Why not.”
  • so you do, and as always, it’s amazing and the two of you have a lot of fun
  • and eventually end up kissing against the mirror, both of you giggling
  • speaking of kisses, his would often be playful
  • as in, he’d love to just give you a light, quick kiss that leaves you wanting for more, which you’re unable to hide, and then kiss you properly, again and again
  • okay okay if you were both in a rush he wouldn’t do that and instead you’d get like one kiss worth of at least five kisses that never fails to make your heart flutter
  • other times he’d be very passionate and boy would those times be hot
  • also highkey the type to be making out with you and suddenly blurt out something like
  • “I’m going to marry you one day.”
  • or something of that kind
  • like if it’s not about how he wants to have enough children to form a soccer team, he definitely wants to let you know that he has high hopes for the two of you, as exaggeratedly as he puts it
  • and in case it seems too much for you he’ll always make sure that you understand that he’s not that serious
  • like he won’t push that kinds of commitment and seriousness onto your relationship if you don’t want to, or at least until you want to, but he does have hopes
  • …plus honestly in a lot of cases it’d be mostly just talk
  • but imagine him saying that he plans on marrying you, and when you just frown because it doesn’t seem like anything you want to do during the next xx years, he laughs and cups your cheeks
  • “I’m half-joking, Y/N, don’t look so troubled. Let’s go at our own pace and see where we end up, yeah?”
  • and so you’re good again
  • as often as possible, Soonyoung would love to go out with you, although he’d always have to disguise himself to a point
  • but it doesn’t bother you too much, not if that means you get to go to a restaurant with him or go to an amusement park together
  • not to forget that if there is Shinee, there will be you and Soonyoung
  • you’d always look forward to their comebacks together, and quite likely even do your best to watch their music videos etc as soon as they’re out and freak out together
  • some of the other members would probably join you, too, but a lot of them would just raise their eyebrows and be confused while the two of you watch Shinee’s, Taemin’s or Jonghyun’s newest music video 
  • “He looks so cool!!”
  • “Look at those dance moves! I’m getting chills!”
  • “I know! This is so good!”
  • …and if the others are ever wondering when any of the aforementioned have a comeback coming up, they realize that if one was, they would know
  • because whenever there’s news that they’d have a comeback, Soonyoung would dash to the nearest member and exclaim
  • “They’re having a comeback next month!!”
  • and you’d both gush about it all the way until the comeback happened, and even afterwards you’d keep up with the promotions as well as you could
  • the day he co-emceed with Key would’ve been a great day for him but also for you lmao 
  • you’d snuggle him the next time you saw each other and just mumble “You met Key… how amazing.”
  • he’d laugh and be very proud for a while, probably even boast about how amazing it was, but then…
  • “…It was so scary let me tell you, he’s just so cool.”
  • and you can only imagine - if Key looked cool on stage, you could only imagine what he must’ve been like when you’re right next to him
  • in short, you’d have a loving boyfriend, a best friend and a fellow Shawol in one package and it couldn’t get better than that
  • naturally it’s not always just smooth sailing, but it would be a happy, healthy relationship
  • and although it should be a given, some of your sweetest words to each other would be
  • “I love you more than I love Shinee.”

Admin Scooter

cobwebbing  asked:

/ slams fist on the table/ TELL ME ABOUT YOUR PREDICTIONS FOR HOW REYLO IS GONNA GO DOWN

Aw, thank you for that question! *cracks knuckles* 

AND JEEZ I WROTE A FUCKING NOVEL ROFL

To be honest, I have trouble separating my general TLJ speculation from my Reylo speculation, but I think that’s mainly because I think Rey and Kylo are going to spend a lot of time together in the next film. 

  • Basically, I’m pretty sure Rey and Luke won’t get along very well. I even think Luke might downright refuse to train her. It doesn’t help that we got pretty solid evidence that Rey is not exactly good Jedi material. It’ll depend on what kind of Jedi Luke is, but again, Rey is anything but all calm and the “no attachments” kind of person. (Like, not gonna lie, I read the Ahsoka novel lately, and one thing that struck me was how rigid the “no attachments” rule was, and how Ahsoka suffered from it even if she didn’t admit it out loud. All I could think was: “Nope. Rey is not a Jedi, unless she undergoes some serious character change. And that wouldn’t be positive character change AT ALL.) 
  • I think Luke’s possible refusal to train Rey might also come from the fact she’s a lot more like Ben/Kylo than she (and the audience) believe. It’s not going to help that I’m pretty sure Rey is going to be an eager puppy around Luke, at least at the beginning. Remember that part where she bypasses the compressor and looks all happy about it, and Han doesn’t give her the credit she thinks she deserves and gets all crestfallen? I mean, she clearly already saw him as a father figure at that moment (even if she knew Han for, like, ten minutes), and she was pretty desperate for his approval. I’m ready to bet she’s going to go after Luke as a replacement father figure, which is not the healthiest thing to do, but at same time, considering Rey’s background, it’s not surprising (and it makes her situation pretty tragic, come to think of it). Luke pushing her away is REALLY going to hurt, methinks. 
  • Rey will probably learn something about Kylo’s backstory at some point, that will make him more sympathetic to her eyes. I don’t know how. It could be a vision or something, but we have to keep in mind that MSW rumors had it that just before Kylo shows up on Ahch-To, Luke wants Rey to kill Kylo and she doesn’t want to. Make of that what you will, but I think it would take something BIG for Rey to refuse to end Kylo’s life, because she ain’t a sweet little peach. I think it might have something to do with Kylo/Ben’s backstory with Luke. I mean, I’m pretty sure TLJ will be the answer to whatever question we might have had on the current Skywalker family drama. 
  • I think Kylo is going to come on Ahch-To probably at the end of the first act or in the middle of the film, max. Otherwise, if he comes at the climax like (fake) rumors seem to claim, Rey is going to spend the entire film stuck with Luke on a desert island, and she’s supposed to be the heroine. Booooring. (Plus, Adam Driver spent a lot of time filming in Ireland, so I don’t think Kylo is going to show up on Ahch-To just for one scene at the end.) 
  • As for Kylo’s mental state when he shows up… I don’t know. I’m pretty sure the trailers are going to show him off as a Big Bad, but there are two scenarios: either Snoke managed to convince him to have his revenge on Rey, and he’ll come on Ahch-To with his stupid-ass Vader cape flappin’ in the wind, and he’ll start dueling Rey and realize he just can’t bring himself to harm her, and then Rey drops the bomb about whatever she knows about his past. That just renders him helpless. But the other scenario is that maybe Snoke’s convincing just didn’t work this time, because he’s having way too many doubts, and while he keeps on obeying the Supreme Leader, he goes straight to attacking Rey when he arrives on Ahch-To just to pull off a tough show in front of the Knights of Ren (because no, I have a feeling they ain’t Kylo’s buddies). 
  • As for the rumors of Rey falling from a cliff into the water… I don’t know. It could happen (well it would just be a good excuse to see Dangerous Dreamboat without his shirt, and I wouldn’t be complaining, but hey.) 
  • And sure, have Luke take down the KoR in the meantime. I admit they’d kind of be in the way (I mean, they’re probably just there to look cool. *eyeroll*). 
  • From there… so we have Rey who knows thanks to backstory that things aren’t quite what they seem with Kylo, even if she still feels confused towards him at best, and Kylo is still all like “The Supreme Leader is wise” while on the inside he’s screaming “WHAT THE FUUUUUCK”, and then TEENAGE HORMONES KICK IN, AND FROM THAT MOMENT, AFTER DEALING WITH THE HELL THAT WAS HAN AND LEIA, LUKE SKYWALKER IS FUCKING DOOMED
  • Okay, no, for real. I’ll just point out one little thing: in TFA, Snoke and Hux seem to have no problem with the map getting destroyed or Ahch-To getting blown up. What’s important is that Luke must not reach Leia. Kylo… seems to have another purpose entirely. He *wants* the map, so I think there’s something on Ahch-To (which is home to the first Jedi Temple) which he wants. Not to mention that I’m pretty sure him falling to the DS and joining Snoke isn’t just for UNLIMITED POWAH. I also think that whatever treasure is on Ahch-To is hard to access. I mean, it doesn’t seem as if Luke managed to access it. So methinks it takes two to access the Jedi Temple. (starts humming “It Takes Two” from Into the Woods
  • All right, considering Raiders of the Lost Ark is a big inspo for Rey and Kylo’s plot, according to Rian Johnson… I think we’re going to have Kylo coaxing Rey into giving him the headpiece for the staff of Ra helping him access whatever’s in the temple. Luke… will not be pleased. But I think at that point, Rey will have had more than her share of Luke and will side with Kylo. 
  • I MEAN WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU PUT AN 30-YEAR-OLD VIRGIN IMPERIAL ARCHIVES NERD AND A CUTE SCAVENGER ON A DESERT ISLAND CONTAINING AN OLD JEDI TEMPLE, C’MON RIAN
  • Gimme some fun Jedi Temple exploring action. And Kylo attempting to impress Rey with his AMAZING knowledge. And Hanleia levels of bantering. 
  • I think it would be a good opportunity for the movie to become more introspective without slowing down the action too much. Rey has issues, and so does Kylo, and I think it’d be a good moment for them to realize that they’re not so different, and that families aren’t the sugar-coated vision Rey used to have of them. 
  • And then… let’s say the FO arrives on Ahch-To because Snoke realizes Kylo is planning to elope with Rey slipping out of his control. I JUST WANT A SCENE LIKE THIS M’KAY. 

Basically, just replace Indy with Kylo, Marion with Rey, and Belloq with Hux (?). 

  • Then… I could see the movie’s climax taking place on Ahch-To, and Finn’s Resistance plot coming to meet Rey’s there. Basically, the Resistance could get worried of not getting any news from Luke and could head to Ahch-To and start panicking when they see the FO presence there, or maybe get info thanks to intel that the FO is heading straight to Luke. Meanwhile, Rey and Kylo would try to escape, and get caught. 
  • Not gonna lie, I think Kylo is going to get the Skywalker Special (i.e. getting his hand chopped off). I also think Rey is going to tap in the Dark Side at the end of the movie, and I could see a scenario where she gets so scared and angry she unleashes a wave of pure DS power and kills every enemy around her (let’s say Hux too, because you know, it would permit Rey to tap in the DS and do a kill that could easily be forgiven in the eyes of the GA. Plus, that ginger space Nazi is deaaaad.) I could also see that happening when Finn is around? I think Rey and Finn will meet again in the third act of the film, but in not so good circumstances, and that would make that kind of situation work. Anywho, Rey will probably be devastated, and I think the movie is going to end with her and Kylo finally managing to escape and going rogue. 
  • I think there will be a time jump between VIII and IX (because there seems to be something happening whenever you’re 23 in SW, and Rey is going to be 19 by the time of TLJ). I think travelling together will help both Rey and Kylo to see things from another perspective, and just… take a break from all this? If that makes any sense? (Okay, I’m kind of going quick because this post is way too long already, lol)
  • I also think Reylo will become two-sided at the very end of TLJ. Before that would be too rushed imo, and for it taking place in IX… I admit I don’t really see Colin Trevorrow pulling it off. Plus, if they spend some time on their own, it might help them find a bit more stability with themselves and all that jazz (even if I think it’ll just be the beginning of Rey’s problems…) 

So yeah. Those are pretty much my predictions - or rather wishful thinking, lol. I’m pretty sure the ending is super not clear because I kind of rushed to finish this rant, but hopefully, it’ll give you a good idea. ;) 

Send me a SW-related question. 

Zootopian Holiday: Spicy Nick Appreciation Day

Founded by yours truly, Spicy Nick Day is a Zootopian holiday dedicated to officially appreciating our beloved Nick Wilde in his upmost sexiest form, because we love him this way! ;) Artists from all across the fandom collectively post an artwork, their ‘contribution’, be they separate or in a thread (which personally I like to call the Spice Parade ^^’) or both :) We celebrate by taking part in the art trend or by simply reblogging and commenting on the works we see, so in a way we are praising the artists along with the fox! :D This is a fun day for all Zootopians great and small who adore and lust after Nick and his naturally sultry nature~ again, bc it’s fun!
Here are the Rules and Regulations:
1. Spicy Nick Appreciation Day takes place on the 14th of every month in honor of Jason Bateman’s birthday (if you don’t know who he is… *sniff* boi -_-) Credit to the date goes to @boneboy679 aka @wildehopps679 /he thought of it first/ A month gives us artists time to develop a fantastic piece without too much pressure and the audience won’t get tired of the craze (not that we can never get enough of this hawt fox anyway mmm *I hope I worded that right*)
2. With that said, to truly be a part of this, you must post your contribution between the hours of 12:00am to 11:59pm on the 14th day! Sort of a given but eh, just wanna be clear. 
3. Spicy Nick Day is everyday! :D Disclaimer: This holiday does not limit you to posting spicy fanart solely on the 14th of every month. If you wanna post before or after, then be my guest! Post some spice every day for all I care! I understand some blogs are dedicated to a daily dose of sin 😈 The 14ths are just the 'official’ appreciation days when we all come together and overdose on spice-tastic artwork. It’s the same as being a year-round prankster, but upping your game on April Fools Day y'know 😋 I’m not in charge of telling someone what they can post and when, but maaaybe save the best for the holiday?? Or whatevs 
4. You are not limited to only the character, Nick, either! If you want, make a “Lewdie Judy” (credit for that name goes to @cimar-of-turalis-wildehopps ) if you’d like to give Hopps some appreciation too, then go ahead! If drawing Nick isn’t your forte then just do our lovely bun; or even pair her up with Nick y'know. After all that’s what I did! We do luuuve our WildeHopps ;)
5. [Probably the most important rule] It is absolutely mandatory that every contribution and/or reblog is tagged #Zootopia just like any other Zootopia related post! We all know this. It’s non-negotiable. If you forget, fix it! Help us get back to the top! You are however given the choice of additional tags. These include, but are not limited to: #Spicy Nick Appreciation Day #Spicy Nick Day #Zootopia Holiday #Spicy Nick #Nick Wilde #NSFW sorta #WildeHopps etc. etc. etc. 
6. AUs are invited! (as long as they spicy ;) Always strive for originality, but if you have a great au-related idea in mind then have at it! 
7. The amount of spice in your contribution is both unlimited…and limited. In all honesty this is supposed to be fun and not intentionally an 'overly erotic’ day, rather simply a 'spicy’ day y'know. But if NSFW is your goal then I guess I can’t stop ya *shrug* However please remember some people are sensitive to too much risqué themes and I recommend maaaybe dialing it down. Don’t make it weird for anyone. We’re supposed to enjoy the day as much as possible and not regret it in the end ^^’
8. On that note, characters do not have to be completely naked! Dress Nick in the Playboy bunny outfit for all I care! xD Or if Nick completely clothed but dawning a suggestive smirk/pose is more comfortable for you, then do that. 
9. Collaborations are totally welcomed! As long as you all can work together and get it done in time then collabs would be a blast!
10. Go big! I’ve usually posted a series of drawings rather than one so try that too. Just don’t run out of inspiration ^^’
11. This is not a competition! It’s a celebration! Do not put anyone down! Leave us artists some kudos yo :D
12. You do not have to participate if you don’t want to! Observation of Spicy Nick Day is totally up to you. No one is required to celebrate it. Whether you’re, say, an artist who can’t whip up a contribution in time due to whatever circumstance, if reblogging other ppl’s work is more your speed, or if this just isn’t your 'thing’ for whatever reason, it’s totally okay to ignore the craze. 
13. You don’t have to be an artist to participate! Take that in any way you like and be creative in whatever you choose to do ^^
14. Super Important Reminder!! The characters Nick Wilde and Judy Hopps are well respected characters! We all know this. I mean c'mon guys, we love them! Sure this is a fan-made holiday for spicing them up, but try not to go overboard please. Don’t totally ruin these two. Let me say that one more time, don’t ruin them pls! Just keep that in mind. But HAVE FUN! :D /I hope this covers everything/

anonymous asked:

Hey, do you know of any fics with trans Remus or Sirius, or just any trans characters in general. Preferably more happy ones, I just got putted to my parents as trans and I'm feeling kinda shitty right now. It's fine if you don't know of any

Oh jeez, it really sucks that you got outed…outing anyone else is just such a shitty thing to do. I hope things get better for you– you’re awesome and strong and I know you can do this, even though it’s hard and it doesn’t feel good right now.

But anyway, yes, I can absolutely provide you with some trans!wolfstar recs! I’ve recently updated my trans!Sirius reclist and my non-binary!Sirius reclist, and for tumblr posts I have a trans!Remus tag, a trans!Sirius tag, and a non-binary!Sirius tag. And for non-wolfstar I only have a small list of trans!Lily fics but if you request other HP characters I’ll see what I can do. All that’s left is trans!Remus fics, so here you go! 

Notes: There are actually so. many. FANTASTIC trans!Remus fics that I’ve had to break them up into “Definitely read” (my faves) and “Also check out” but honestly all of them are fabulous & worth reading. I’ve tried to make this a fairly comprehensive list of trans!Remus wolfstar fics, but I’ve done my best to mark angsty fics & list warnings so that you can decide whether or not to read them.

All fics feature transmale!Remus unless noted specifically that the fic contains transfemale!Remus.

Trans!Remus fics

Definitely read:

  • *TransFigured by picascribit– 26k, E, mwpp era. “We thought you might be a werewolf,” said Sirius. “What?” Remus almost laughed at the absurdity….“I know. All I meant was, we thought you might be, and we still wanted to be friends. Whatever you’re not telling us — how much worse can it be?“” Fantastic fic but beware of angst, esp. in the beginning. TW: suicide attempt, transphobia, bullying, dysphoria. [Sequel: TransLate– 5k, M, mwpp era. Accidental pregnancy.]
  • *I’ll paint a mural of your smile by david8– 33k, T, non-magic/coffee shop AU. “…it doesn’t take Sirius long to sense something different about Remus…And soon, even Remus understands that not everything is as it should be with the seemingly happy, extroverted and flirtatious rich guy…” Also with bipolar, non-binary Sirius. Some angst related to mental illness.
  • *I just didn’t know it yet. by genderisasocialconstruct– 1k, G, MWPP era & post-Hogwarts. “Sirius comes to realise that the time waiting for his soulmate was well worth the wait.” Soulmate AU. Super super cute. Fluff. 
  • *Queer As Day by philiatran– WIP~ 24k, T, non-magic/university AU. “Sirius Black…has two things. 1. A penchant for photography. and 2. A tumblr blog dedicated to picture after picture of Remus Lupin.” Everyone is queer and it is fabulous. Some angst regarding friendships, as well as several clearly-marked triggers, esp. TW: dysphoria, transphobia, past suicide attempt, depression.
  • Long Distance by irrationalmoony & LadyAmina– WIP~ 21k, E, non-magic/university AU. “James, Sirius, Remus, and Peter have been inseparable since…their first day at Hogwarts boarding school. So when Remus relocates to France for further schooling…they’re not going to let the distance stop them…” Texting fic, also with genderfluid!Sirius. Fluff.
  • *Succession of Halos by LadyFaceElena– 7k, G, non-magic AU. “When Remus gets talked into seeing his favourite author–Astronomy Professor S. Black–hold a stargazing lecture, he…does not expect the ripped jeans and rolling-stones t-shirt wearing, motor-bike riding Sirius Black….” Also has genderfluid!Sirius.
  • Forbidden by LadyFaceElena– 12k, G, non-magic/university AU. “...Lily and Marlene decide to make a video in response to Israel’s banned book about a Jewish and Arab romance…Artist Sirius Black reluctantly agrees to participate…having no idea he’s on the path to finding love…” Also has genderfluid!Sirius. Contains discussions of family issues & oppression but not overly angsty.
  • *All Hail the Outlaws by LadyFaceElena– 29k, E, non-magic/university AU. “One of Remus Lupin’s three jobs happens to be working maintenance for their flat building…James Potter and Sirius Black move in across the hall…the pair set out to make their neighbours new best friends, and everyone’s life is turned upside down, but in the best way possible.” Some mentions of transphobia & misgendering but mostly fluff.
  • Boys by oliverdalstonbrowning– 3k, G, mwpp era. “Remus doubts himself and Sirius plays Space Oddity.” So much fluff. Remus has some dysphoria in this but really it’s just so fluffy.
  • The Hands and the Heart by oliverdalstonbrowning–3k, T, mwpp era. “Dysphoria is the hardest struggle Remus has ever faced, but Sirius is determined to show him the hands and the heart of his situation. [TW: Gender Dysphoria, self-harm, brief alcohol mention.]” Definitely angsty but oh-so-sweet.
  • No Understanding no Sound from Above by kyuuketsukirui– 2k, M, multiple eras. “Remus has a secret that has nothing to do with the full moon.” Closeted transfemale!Remus. Beautiful writing but very sad– lots of internal and external angst due to canon timeline, no happy ending. 
  • ennui by elliotasterion– WIP~ 12k, M, magic AU set after PoA. “Sirius is cleared of all charges after the events of Prisoner of Azkaban, but Peter escapes anyway. Remus and Sirius have to find a way to come together all over again, while keeping Harry out of trouble. (Not a raising-Harry fic.)” Feels very real, quite well-written. Some angst, mostly related to Sirius’s mental health issues & canon events but also a couple transphobic remarks.
  • *Semi-Automatic by destielspancake– WIP~ 68k, T, non-magic/texting AU. Remus and Sirius start texting because of a wrong number. Lots of fun & jokes but also angst– do heed the warnings, esp. TW: dysphoria, self-harm, and references to past suicide attempts and rape.
  • secrets were made to be known by atlaspeaks– 3k, M, mwpp era. “Remus has always had secrets. He’s gotten used to having them - and even more so, used to having them found out.” Lovely & fluffy apart from brief section in which Remus is outed without his consent.

Also check out (below the cut):

Keep reading

fairyetc  asked:

Not referring to the person in the creek posts specifically, Just that I'm tired of the part of the fandom that wants to headcanon everyone as not het yet wants to ignore that one character that is gay as fuck in canon aka Cartman cus they don't like him

That’s exactly the reason too dude. Just today I saw a comic that had Cartman making fun of Butters and Kenny for being gay…..Did we not have an episode where Cartman was the main one supporting Tweek and Craig and plead Cupid Me to help him get those two back together?!?! He’s a fucking fan boy and supports gay people! It was also clear that Matt and Trey was telling us that he’s into guys!

Still not convinced?

This season, he makes up a theory about chicks wanting mens semen and jokes because they aren’t funny to him anymore! Then the motherjumper wipes off his cheek in disgust after learning that Heidi isn’t who he thought she was!

He now has a hard time trusting girls!

Also, after being told that vaginas don’t have balls, he continues to day dream about vags with balls!!!

TO ADD:
1. He made out with a Justin Timberlake cutout board when he was by himself
2. Him and his BOY cousin touched each others privates
3. He played out going out with Ben just to trick Kyle in the end….that means he WILLINGLY gave him a handjob and could have possibly had sex….with him….ughhhhh
…anyway…
4. When the boys were putting their condoms on, he was the only one trying to catch a peek at Butters and was caught by Stan. He fucking panicked getting caught!
5. He had a fucking crush on M.J and Stan could even tell he had one because of his fucked up dream!
6. All of the Faith Plus 1 songs were love songs about Jesus.
7. “I will. I will suck your balls. Just help me from not freezing myself, and I will get down on my knees and suck your balls. I’ll suck them dry, Kyle.”

Like honestly there’s so much more but this boy is anything from straight.

Dancing with the Linebacker

Rated: M (swear words, life stuff, gonna be smut at some point… let’s be real) - Also this might be a light concept but there are some parts in this that are kind of dark (lots of talk of divorce and some of neglect)

KRISTANNA MODERN AU

Authors Note: So, I have watched Dancing with the Stars off and on for many years (I both love and absolutely hate that show), and the thought struck me last week to make a bit of a fic out of it, and I kind of got obsessed with it and I’m now 7 chapters deep into this dumpster fire (no joke!), but I’ve been way too insecure to post it, but now I know there is a Kristoff/Anna dance tonight I just have to post the first one and please accept this for what this is! Ahhhh!


“Please Daddy!  Pleeeeaaaaassseeeee.”

Kristoff looked down into his daugters honey-brown eyes, wishing that he had never said anything to her.  The fact was, they had been asking him to do the show for three seasons, and he always politely declined, knowing that he was a terrible dancer.  Well that, and the fact that he hated being in the spotlight, and going on the show would literally thrust him into one.

Keep reading

possibly the start of a fic???

hi I wrote this thing very late at night (or very early morning???) It starts off shitty and dramatic but it actually has a plot. 

I only put a little but up for you to see so you can read the rest under the cut.

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

Keith has never been in love. 


He thought he was, at one point.  The head-over-heels kind, in fact. The first love kind. The reckless kind.

Love, he learned, was not where you give every part of your heart or soul to your loved one. It was not where you put everything on the line for the other person, uncaring about the repercussions. It wasn’t the warm, tingly feeling you get when you look at the person you gave your entire life for. That feeling of being on top of the world when you hold their hand or kiss their cheek in public.

It certainly wasn’t what they show in the movies.

And so, Keith, at the tender age of eighteen, got his heart broken so far into oblivion that he lost a part of himself in the process. 

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

What do you imagine for Julian's most embarrassing moments? I'm thinking of writing a fic with all of the characters most humiliating experiences and how each one could add to them as characters, but Julian has me stumped (so does Caitlin, honestly, but I have a few ideas for her.) I'm doing childhood, teen years, and adulthood for each of them so far, but anything that might help me think of something I appreciate! (I won't steal your ideas, just looking for inspiration and generally curious)

First, I’m sorry it took me ages to answer your ask dear anon. If it’s any comfort, I did spend the whole day zoning out and thinking about it. I encourage you guys to use any idea I’m posting, this fandom is like one big happy family and seeing that someone likes one of my ideas enough to include it in their stories gives me life!! (I’d love to read your work once it’s finished! I’m always here if you need to bounce ideas off.) 


I have a very specific headcanon about Julian’s old traumas therefore what could’ve embarassed him, get ready for a long and angsty trip, love!


When we first meet Julian Albert, we discover a brilliant snarky man who’d rather work alone, has no faith in His coworker and so obviously puts up a tough front whenever he interracts with people. All in all everything about Julian screams TRUST ISSUES.

What on earth could possibly cause a wealthy kid to mistrust people ?

The answer is simple: Being used. Over and over again.

To answer your question, Julian’s most embarassing moment as a child probably wasn’t about being publicly humiliated but more about the deep and sudden realization that he didn’t fit, that kids only befriended him when they wanted something from him. Overhearing your friends say that they only tolerate you so you’d do their homework would do that to you too.

Being the smart kid he was, Julian quickly found a solution, he preferred to be alone anyway.

Growing up, not allowing anyone to use him for his intelligence became a second nature and soon he was off to college, a place full of brilliant minds like him. A place where being smart didn’t paint a bull’s eye on his back.

He was still new to the whole making friends concept but he’d lie if he said he didn’t enjoy it. Meeting people as passionnate for science as he was had thrilled him, for the first time he felt understood. Safe.

Soon enough Julian couldn’t count how many friends he had, he’d go out with a new group almost every night. Friends even complained about not seeing him enough and the best part was that no one asked him to help on science projects or figure out a difficult formula for them. All they wanted was to have fun with him.

It was a call from his bank that made him realize he’d spent a fortune that month. He wasn’t aware how expensive all those drinks, gifts, clothes and tickets he’d paid for truly were. Acting responsible, the following night resulted in all his friends leaving him at the party and as if it wasn’t clear enough the only one that kept him compagny was trying to convince him that someone as rich as him should learn to loosen up and share for once. He had been used again. Second most humiliating moment.

If Julian had been foolish enough to think people could only use him in one way, he didn’t make that mistake again. He  cut ties with the other students and burried himself under work until he graduated with honors and left for good.

Emma’s death had devastated everyone but Julian was a wreck. His sister had meant the world to him. Seeing her again, months after the funeral had bereft him of logic.

Stones, research and expeditions, he’d done anything to get her back but he woke up in his hotel room instead, pictures of his dead team-mates on every local news channel. Fear, panic and guilt had washed over him, knowing that being the only one spared, he’d make the ideal culprit. It was probably a trap, one he had so willingly stepped in. He had been used again, in the most literal sense of the term this time, used body and mind. How ? There was so much he didn’t understand. Who would even believe him when he could hardly believe it himself? There it was, the third most humiliating moment of his life, laced with so much fear that he’d barely recognized the feeling.

Being used had by then become Julian’s biggest fear.

Meeting Barry Allen reminded him of every single person he wanted to get along with only to end up as a tool in their hands. The job not done, the half arsed excuses, the honest to god promise to get things done later and the big pleased smile when Julian would offer to do it instead.

He has somehow ended up with a team, a respectable one at that, trying to amend for his mistakes but Julian Albert wasn’t done being used.

therealkayvercetti  asked:

And advice for what to say as starter messages on SA? I don't wanna sound like its scripted but i don't wanna leave out my own twist. Is there any templates to help a baby get started for messaging? I'm looking for something h can use universal but add my own spice to it so each SA match feels special. Tracks in advance!!

Secrets: How to Message Men on Sugar Daddy Sites

I get asked this question too many times and I don’t like to answer it because when empirestatesugar ( I miss that chick so much ) was in the bowl she made a masterclass post on it. I tried searching for it on tumblr but not much comes up when you search her name. Luckily I saved this shit in  a word document like a year ago. I used this technique a while ago when I used to be active on SA and so many men pointed out how lovely and personalised my message was. ….Which makes me wonder what kind of message some other people are sending? (100% shade)

 The gold about the template below is when you personalise it to the a PrePOTs profile, he feels special ( he doesn’t realise that you basically sent the same shit to every man you have spoken to)

I’ll state the obvious and say you shouldn’t use this template. Make your own! 

So here it goes. May nobody ask me ‘how to message’ ever again.

All Credit goes to EmpireStateSugar, non of the material below is mine.


“Why I message

Realistically, everyone on these sites is talking with multiple people at once, but as humans we love to feel uniquely noticed. So the two key things I try to remember for an initial spam message are to stroke the ego and elicit interest. You’re doing a really great job with taking initiative but now it’s time to crank up your messages and get the responses you want and deserve, girl!

Think of an initial message like a voicemail. If you get a voicemail saying, “Hey it’s Andy. Call me back.” You’ll be like what does this bitch want? If you get a voicemail saying, “Hey, gorgeous. It’s Andy! Haven’t heard from you in a while. I have the FUNNIEST story to tell you. You’re gonna die. Call me back some time tonight before 10pm or else I’ll be asleep. Can’t wait to hear from you. Bye!” What are the key differences here? The first one lacks motive or reason and has no sense of urgency. You have no idea why Andy called or what he wants. Consequently, it’s not enticing and it’ll either take you hours/days to call Andy back or you’ll text him and say “Hey got your voicemail. What’s up?” You never want a POT to have to ‘What’s Up’ (aka wtf do you want) you! When people write on their profiles “Not a fan of endless emails/texting” THIS IS WHY. Make your point and make sure your point is a good one! The second voicemail not only makes the point but it leaves the receiver begging for more. What’s Andy’s story? I’ve got to hear it! I might even walk out in the middle of class just to call Andy back and hear what he has to say. This is the difference between a green check next to ‘sent messages’ and an inbox full of responses.

When I Message

On SA, there’s a daily quota of how many messages you can send so choose wisely! Winks are unlimited per day, but as I mentioned above, they are the crutch of the lazy and unimaginative. Your words carry much more clout! Rather than wasting messages on men who are too cheap/indecisive to pay for a premium membership, always make sure that the yellow “Premium” is highlighted on the banner on his profile. This way he can actually see, read, and respond to your messages!

How I Message

This might go without saying, but don’t waste your time reaching out to splenda, salt, and meatsuits. Just because BigDickDaddy69lives 10 minutes away from you and has a million dollar income doesn’t mean meeting with him will be worth your time (but if you want a free dinner, go for it girl!). READ THEIR PROFILES. Ctrl + F for “sex”, “kinky”, “stamina”, and other TRIGGER WARNING: TACKY AS FUCK words. If he’s in the clear, move on to extracting tidbits about him that you find interesting – his career, places he’s visited, sports he’s into, activities he loves, etc. Ctrl + T his profile in a tab right next to the message you’re writing for him so that you can refer back to it quickly if need be (I say this because Doctor is technologically challenged and idk you might be too lol). While spamming out your daily email quota should not take more than 30-60 minutes and you are not here to write each individual man an ode, you do want to have some specifics.

Who I message

Assuming I’ve found a premium member who is not a meatsuit, there are two categories that he’ll fall in: Silent Sam and Fun Freddy.

Silent Sam is the standard SA user who, for reasons of extreme discretion, novice sugar profile experience, weak self-selling game, or all three, lacks a well-defined profile. His About Me and About You are brief and vague with phrases like “let’s talk”, “message me for more”, “Handsome, fit, gentleman seeks SB”, “looking for a mutually beneficial arrangement” or other NO DUH type shit. He may have little to no photos, or, worse, have several tailored-suit or beach bod selfie shots thinking that his looks speak for him. He is probably using a vague username like “NYCbanker” or a fake name like “Mike.” Although his hazy wants and needs are frustrating, he is not to be discounted for reasons such as his high income/net worth, high allowance (or it may be open/negotiable but his income is high enough), handsome photos, or ideal location. Thus, I conclude that Silent Sam has the potential to be a good SD and simply needs me to extract this from him.

Fun Freddy, unlike Silent Sam, details his love of Russian ballet and need for an SB who shares it at length on his profile. Indeed, his wants, needs, hobbies, etc. are described explicitly on his About Me and About You which are each a solid one or two paragraphs at least. He may have several photos, or still have little to none for needs of discretion or otherwise. Like Silent Sam, his income/net worth, allowance, and location work well for you but he has a leg up on Sam in that his personality and ideal arrangement align with yours as well.

What I message

(I’ve italicized the template and the rest is just content I scraped from his profile)

Subject: Hey there, (Sam/handsome/nothing if he has no name or photos)! :)

Body: SO jealous that you live in Neptune! It’s a mere four planets away from me so I drive out often for the amazing rock climbing scene. Do you dabble in that at all? Unfortunately there’s not much of that on Earth where I’m from but it’s probably my favourite hobby. Have you ever been to Earth before? As a Management Consultant, I’m sure that you travel to several fun planets and I can tell there’s a ton I’d love to pick your brain about as I too enjoy sight-seeing in various corners of our galaxy. I’ve enjoyed your profile thus far and would love to hear a bit more about you and your ideal arrangement sometime soon.

Cheers,

Kelly Clarkson

^ Silent Sam is more time-consuming to message because you have to pull teeth to fatten up your template. You can’t spew generic compliments like “You’re so handsome!” or “You seem like a fun, active guy” when you have no idea about either. You must rely a bit more on speculation. But this message does a great job of inserting yourself into the narrative of his life. Now he knows that you’re available to meet for coffee in Neptune often. He knows you love to travel and he doesn’t have to feel shy about asking you to join him on his bi-weekly business trips to Pluto. You also shoot him a few questions highlighting your interest in his life and give him action-steps (tell me more about yourself and your arrangement) to steer the conversation where you want to go and to give HIM a template for how to respond. Nothing worse than a message from a guy that says “How are you?” right? Ugh! 
This makes YOU have to do all of the guesswork. Don’t be that guy. Save your busy CEO the trouble and give him three or four key points to come back at you with, which will be helpful as you’re trying to learn more about him in spite of his blank ass profile. Ultimately, this message shows that you’re impressed with him all off of a few words that he wrote down – what an incentive to divulge more!

Subject: Hey there, (Fred/handsome/nothing if he has no name or photos)! :)

Body: I couldn’t help but gush over your profile! Not only are your photos absolutely scrumptious, but you write so eloquently! It’s evident that you are an intelligent, successful, well-travelled gentleman who knows how to have a lot of fun. We definitely share a lot of values and passions in common. I LOVE that you’re a veterinarian – I have two puppies myself. What made you want to study that line of medicine?Your photo line-dancing was very handsome! Have you ever tried salsa before? If not, I’ll simply have to teach you as it is my favorite form of dance :) You seem like you’d be an absolute blast to spend time with and I’d love the chance to find that out for myself. Can’t wait to hear more about you and your ideal arrangement soon!

 

Xoxo,

Beyonce

^ This dude could be the most boring guy in the world but I’m still gonna what? Stroke that ego! I act like his profile blew me away. Best I’ve read since I joined the site. He worked really hard to craft those paragraphs so I reward him accordingly. As Drake says, “I’m telling every girl she’s the one for me, when I ain’t even planning to call.” Make him think that you think that he is the shit! You might be wary of doing so because then he’ll think you’re puddy in his hands, but it really has the opposite effect. These men get dozens of messages that commit the below-mentioned offences (or are boring like yours lol) and to read from someone passionate, exciting, and lively is a breath of fresh air. Remember the voicemail thing. If you have ten “Hey call me back” voicemails and one enthusiastic, inquiring, fun voicemail, who are you going to call back first? The more interest I show in him, the happier and more inclined to learn about me he will be. Moreover, just like your message to Silent Sam, you’re seeking to insert yourself in the narrative of his life by allowing him to envision you two salsa dancing together. Once you plant this image in his mind, he’ll simply have to make it a reality!

AN INITIAL MESSAGE IS NOT THE TIME FOR:

Rapid-fire interrogation into his merits as an SD OR to bring up how much allowance I want.

“Hey there, John! I’ve loved your profile. So tell me, what brings you to SA rather than a more traditional site such as eHarmony? Have you ever been a sugar daddy before? If so how much allowance did she get? And why did it end? Can’t wait to hear back from you!”

^Hey there, SB, you’re hot. Why are you on SA? Do you like older men a lot? The harrier the better? How many older men have you been with? Did you let them do anal? How deep? ………………..Are you uncomfortable yet? This neither strokes the ego nor elicits interest. Instead, I pocket these key questions for the next message or two. Like real dating, sugar dating is about a personality match initially so I start off seeing what we have in common and then (soon, don’t wait forever) move on to see if our arrangement expectations align. As so many SBs say, treat him like a person, not an ATM.

Regurgitating my entire profile.

“Hey there, John! I’m a fun, sexy, college student at University of Tampa who is majoring in psychology. I love to dance, travel, and play with my cats. I keep in shape by running four miles a day and I’m training for my first marathon coming up this summer. Blah. Blah. Blah. Copy and paste from my profile.”

^After a guy reads my message, he will immediately go to your profile to learn more about me. So let’s give him more to learn! Don’t just say everything you’ve already said before. Your profile should do the telling and your message should do the showing. If you say you’re fun, flexible and like to travel – show it! This probably won’t elicit interest since it’s not anything he couldn’t find from just reading your profile. And it certainly doesn’t do anything to stroke the ego since it’s all about you.

Ultimatums.

“Hey there, John! I’m a fun, sexy, college student who is looking for a man to spend time with two to three times a month for wining & dining, enriching experiences, and a mutual beneficial arrangement with, on my part, a monthly allowance of $5000. Is that YOU? :)” ^ It can be tempting to send the latter message because it seemingly weeds out guys who aren’t what I’m looking for, right? Especially since guys send us these messages all the time a la, “I’m not looking to waste either of our time so here’s what I want yada yada yada.” Well these type of gun to the head messages are a big turn-off to a lot of people (especially shy newbies like Silent Sam); it’s better to start light and then delve into what you’re looking for a message or two later. While this message may elicit some interest, if anything, it hurts the ego by measuring this man against my standards right off the bat. Don’t be a salt baby. Don’t make it “Are you good enough for me? Why should I choose you?” But instead “are we good enough for eachother?” (at least not to his face)

SA winks and literal winks “;)” as they are universally tacky and creepy lol.

RECAP, AN INITIAL MESSAGE IS THE TIME TO:

Reveal specifically what I find appealing about a man.

Reveal my fun personality to this man.

Enable him to envision the exponential surge in his quality of life with me as his SB.” 

__ empirestatesugar -deactivated :(