i want to make beautiful things

😭Just Friends [Part 4] (Grayson x Reader)

Summary: Imagine being best friends with Ethan while you’re hooking up with his brother Grayson. What’s worse? Keeping it from him. You’re 22 while Gray is 18. You guys randomly met while you were hanging out with Ethan and well, things happened. But neither one of you wanted to be in a relationship, so instead you guys decided to just be friends…with benefits.

Warnings: 

A/N: Part 4 was written by the always lovely and beautiful @cassmoreiraxo aka @4odolans! Make sure to check out the parts before hand!

Part 3

Originally posted by painfulblisss

The entire drive home I was happy. I was happy that I didn’t end things with Grayson, and I did just have some pretty great sex, but deep down, knowing I was seeing Ethan soon was making me feel guilty. He was my best friend and I was keeping this huge secret from him. I got home and immediately took a shower because all I could smell was sex and Grayson’s cologne. I walked into my apartment and jumped into the shower. Once I got out, I saw I had a text from Ethan.

Ethan: Don’t worry about meeting me there for pancakes tonight. I’ll come and pick you up. See you soon

With that being said I started to get ready. I put on distressed light washed high waisted jean shorts, a baggy camo shirt which I tied a knot in the middle of it so it hugged my curves better, I left my curly hair down and started on my makeup. Ethan texted me saying he was downstairs waiting for me and for me to hurry because “he was so hungry that he was withering away into nothing.” No wonder he’s the Drama King of the Dolan Twins. I put on my white converse and headed downstairs. The ride there we jammed out to music and laughed. I loved Ethan he was my best friend and I felt like such a shitty person for hiding this from him.

We pulled into the Pancake House and got seated. We both ordered what we wanted and started talking.

“Is everything okay Y/N? You’ve been acting kind of strange the past couple of weeks.” Ethan asked me looking concerned.

“I’m okay Ethan. Just stressed with work. You know not all of us can be successful YouTubers” I smirked at him. He lightly kicked me under the table, which caused both of us to laugh. But then I noticed his face fell.

Originally posted by justholdon-dolan

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Ethan asked not looking up from his place mat. I didn’t say anything, but I knew what he was talking about. “I know what’s been going on Y/N. I’m not stupid.” Ethan looked at me for a second then looked away from me. He couldn’t have known about Grayson and I. We’ve been so careful.

“What are you talking abou—“ Ethan cut me off before I could finish my sentence.

“I know about you and Gray. I know you guys have been having sex. A couple of days after you and I made that video of us baking for YouTube, I found panties under the couch. Gray is always coming home late and usually on the nights Gray is too “busy” to hang out with me and I text you to see if you want to hang out, your phone never works, or you’re busy, or you’re napping. I warned you about him Y/N. What you guys have going on, being fuck buddies isn’t right.” Ethan let out a frustrated sigh. “How could you do this to me?” Ethan clutched his fist.

“I’m so sorry Ethan. I didn’t mean for all of this to start but, when it did, I thought it was a one-time thing. Than that one time thing lead to another, which lead to another and now we are here. I never wanted to lie to you Eth, but Gray and I just didn’t want to hurt your feelings.” I looked at Ethan and I saw the hurt in his eyes.

“I told Gray that you guys couldn’t date when you guys first met. I’ve known he had feelings for you Y/N. But even if you guys do decide to date or whatever, do you really think it’s going to work out? You can’t date. You know the age difference between you guys. That’s weird.” Ethan looked at me and waited for me to say something.

“That’s what you’re concerned about? You know your brother has feelings for me and you’re concerned about our age? He’s a big boy Ethan. He can make his own decisions. I know that’s not it Eth. You use to joke about me and you getting together or you hooking me up with your brother. What’s really wrong?” I stared at my best friend, trying to read his face for an answer, until he finally spoke up.

“He doesn’t do relationships Y/N. But if he did, let’s say and you guys broke up, that’s going to make things change between us. Not only is he my brother, but also he’s my twin brother. You and I wouldn’t be able to hang around as much because he wouldn’t want to run into you and you wouldn’t want to run into him. You probably wouldn’t want to be around me as much because him and I look so much alike. I can’t lose you as my best friend.” Ethan looked back up at me and we just stared at each other. He ran his fingers through his hair as though he is frustrated with this conversation as much as I am.

Originally posted by dolanzbabe

“Ethan, we aren’t dating and even if we did and broke up, no one and I mean NO ONE is ever going to come between us, I promise.” I grabbed Ethan’s hand from across the table and gave it a squeeze. We both just smiled at each other and our pancakes finally came. We ate and talked about anything to break the awkward tension between us. We finished up, paid our check and left.

“Let’s have a best friend night. I think Grayson went to hang out with Jack so let’s go back to our place and watch a movie. Just us. No Grayson and no more talking about him.” Ethan threw his arm around my shoulder as we started to walk over to his car.

Originally posted by thedolangifs

I felt like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders because Ethan knew. I knew I had to end things with Grayson because it could ruin my relationship with Ethan and I valued that more than having a good time with Grayson. Ethan wanted this to be best friends night, but the entire drive back to their apartment, he made it very clear that he didn’t approve of what was going on. We parked at their apartment complex and started to head upstairs. Ethan had just told a really bad joke in the elevator so I was making fun of him as he opened the front door to Grayson looking absolutely amazing and putting on his shoes. We made eye contact and I let out an airy breath.

“You’re going to Jacks now?” Ethan asked Grayson as he shut the door and put his keys on the table. I walked over to the fridge to grab Ethan and I a water bottle when I stopped dead in my tracks.

“Nah, I’m actually just leaving now because I’m going on a date. Don’t wait up Ethan, goodnight and see you Y/N.” With that he shut the door, which left Ethan and I alone in a very quiet apartment.

“I told you Y/N, he doesn’t do relationships.” Ethan looked over at me standing there.

“I’m okay Ethan. It’s not like we’re dating. He can date whoever he likes. I can’t do anything about it. We made a deal, no strings attached.” I looked down at my feet and biting the inside of my cheek.

“Okay, ew gross. I don’t want to hear about some sex deal you made with my brother, which I don’t approve of. He’s going to hurt you Y/N. Get out while you still can.” Ethan walked over and hugged me.

“I’m fine Ethan. I don’t like your brother. Now common, let’s watch a movie. I’ll get it started while you go get the candy.” I walked over to the couch and sat down with my legs crossed under me.

I can’t believe he is actually on a date with someone. I can’t believe I’m starting to fall for him.

Oh, fuck.

Dating Ethan Nestor Would Involve....
  • Him being an absolute sweetheart
  • Cuddles
  • Big spoon Eth
  • Little spoon Eth
  • Him constantly wanting to show he loves you
  • Whether it’s with kisses, hugs, holding your hand, or even random I love you’s. He always wants to make you feel loved.
  • Watching him game because you know it distracts him.
  • Him making sure you know you’re beautiful even if you don’t think you are.
  • “You’re the most gorgeous thing I’ve ever laid eyes on.”
  • You making sure he gets enough sleep when he’s set on spending the night editing.
  • “Ethan, come lay down with me.”
  • “Y/N, you know I have to edit for Mark.”
  • “Come on, you need to sleep sometimes babe.”
  • When he finally decides to come lay down, he falls asleep nearly instantly because he’s exhausted.
  • Good morning kisses.
  • Him wanting to stay in bed and cuddle before the day starts.
  • Play fighting
  • LOTS OF KISSING
  • he may be an innocent blueberry but that boy cannot keep his eyes or hands off you.
  • passionate makeout sessions.
  • Hanging out with Teamiplier.
  • Eth getting flustered whenever you compliment him.
  • Overall being utterly in love with each other.

Ethan makes me happy.

anonymous asked:

Hi! I'm a great fan of your writing and it makes me happy seeing you developing your art and keep growing as an artist. I've read all your rivamika fics and I want to say thank you so much :)

Thank you for taking the time out of your day to send me this, anon. I think it’s a beautiful thing to have people like you who acknowledge the artist’s growth and pay attention to the changes and development; it all makes it even more worthy of hard work and patience.

Honestly having you guys along the journey of growing as artists/authors is a very important factor to the progress one makes, because you make a source of encouragement and support that one needs in order to keep going, because there are people out there who notice the effort and appreciate it. It’s much like a team work, really!

I read this while I was still in bed and it put a smile on my face, so thank you so, so much. I love waking up to messages from kind people.

2

            you make this all go away,  you make this all go away.
    i’m down to just one thing, and i’m starting to scare myself.
            you make this all go away,  you make this all go away.
i just want something, i just want something i can never have.
             nine inch nails something i can never have.

The God Party (until I figure out a better name) Chapter 1

(This is a story I’ve had buzzing around in my head for ages and have wanted to post. Dedicated to Bast and Anubis.)

“Ugh, do I have to? I mean… Parties aren’t my thing…” I whined as Bast worked on my eyeliner and clicked her tongue at me.

“Nonsense, you’re my kitten and every kitten of mine will have a wonderful time at any party I choose for them,” She said with a smile and finished her work holding up a mirror for me to see my new party look. Of course she was able to do everything perfectly to make me look more beautiful than I had felt in ages. The eyeliner made my hazel eyes seem to glow and she had even chosen my favorite glamoured black lipstick that I used to help with confidence. Turning the mirror a little I could see the pleased and slightly cocky look she was wearing knowing how good her work was. “Come on kitten, you trust me don’t you?” She added and out came those big round cat eyes that broke your heartstrings into a million pieces.

“Yes, Bast, I trust you. Fine. Let me find my sneakers and we can go.” I sigh breaking. No one could resist those eyes… except maybe Anubis. I spare him a glance at where he was leaning against the wall arms crossed, looking bored and a little annoyed. At least I wasn’t the only one getting dragged against their will to this party. I blame you for this pup. His voice echoed softly in my mind as he caught my gaze for a moment.

“No silent conversations. Go, shoo, go wait in the car. You know some myths make me your mom ‘Nubis, so you gotta listen to me too.” Bast said eyes bright and Anubis snorted but didn’t argue as he headed out. He wasn’t big on conflict if it wasn’t for something worth while. Though I wouldn’t risk really pissing him off since he did feed unworthy souls to a scary as fuck lion-hippo-crocodile for his day job.

I found my shoes quickly and pulled them on. Bast decided to head out to the car as well and give me some time to catch my breath. I looked in the mirror again and sighed through my nose. “I’m a witch, I can do this. I mean it’s just a little party and Anubis even agreed to tag along. If I can deal with those two all day I can deal with a little party right? Right!” I told myself and the little pep talk helped calm me as I headed out to the car and slid into the backseat. Thankfully Anubis was driving. Which means all laws were followed and street signs obeyed- Bast drove once, let’s just say joy ride might be an understatement for what happened for that trip. I took the time on the drive to Amanda’s house to think about my life. Bast had come along first. She knew I needed her and didn’t need any prompting. And after her Anubis knew that I would need balance for her wild energy and let himself in. I had no doubt my godly family wasn’t finished but with how new I was the others were hanging back for the moment. Once one was in, it was like you opened the door on the whole family tree. Of course no plain-Jane off the street could see them for who they were. They only saw two normal humans who they would probably assume were my parents, or maybe some teen friends. Human sight couldn’t see past the glamour of a god or goddess that wanted to remain hidden.

We arrived at the party all too soon and I wasn’t ready. My heart was beating too fast and my hands were sweaty already. I could hear the loud thrumming music that was happening inside the house from the car and people were leaking out of the front door and scattered in groups on the well trimmed lawn hinting at how packed the place was. Anubis parked and Bast turned in her seat giving me a knowing look. “Who am I?” She asked her tone soothing as a cat’s gentle purr.

“Bast, eye of Ra, protector of lower egypt, goddess of family and joy and the soft gentle sun warming your skin and motherhood and…” She stopped my ramble.

“No. try again. Who am I to you Kitten?” She said taking my hand a squeezing it. I took a breath realizing I had stopped breathing.

“Cat-Mom. My goddess and mother and friend.” I said weakly and she nodded with approval.

“Exactly. I’ll be with you the whole time. You will be fine. Plus ‘Nubis will be around. Do you think we’d let anything bad happen?” She asked and I opened my mouth. “Anything bad that wasn’t going to teach you a lesson or lead to better changes. Plus I promise this party is just for fun. Baby steps.” She added before I could speak and I chuckled. Anubis had opened my door while we had been talking and I stepped out putting my trust in them. If they said I wouldn’t get hurt and would have a good time then I would believe it. I guess it was party time.

anonymous asked:

I look at so many men and just think like 'why are you trying so hard..?' It's annoying and pathetic really lmao & then there's Shawn who's so lowkey with everything what is one of the things that make him so attractive to me! And his immense passion for music like wow... he didn't show his face during the livestreams because he wanted the people to focus on his voice and guitar and don't drop in only saying "you're so hot" "daddy" like stop... he loves music and I respect &I admire that a lot!

Seriously!

Shawn is a BEAUTIFUL PERSON inside and out.

I appreciate his looks, but I appreciate his kind soul and his incredible music more.

anonymous asked:

I LOVE your red haired with the lopsided bangs oc! They are so beautiful and CUTE, and they look so happy, they cheer me up a lot. I just wanna hug em and kiss em and cuddle em and cut em up into little bits!! Thank you for making them :) I hope you didn't find this disturbing, just wanted to compliment your work

thank you!! i’m so glad you like em (and their silly yugioh bangs….!) those are all things you should do to them haha

I know I’m weird this way, but every once in a while I find something that makes me really happy. Something that just brings me pure fucking Joy.  And because (for me) those moments of joy are so few-and-far-between, I want to completely surround myself in the thing.  It’s all I think about and all I want to do.  So I do the thing.  I read, sing, dance, play, draw, cook, write - whatever that thing is, I do it.  And it makes me happy, and if I’m really lucky it makes me feel like this whole existence isn’t a total crock of shit.

Sometimes, in the process of doing the thing, I make a thing.  And it’s beautiful and perfect and I love it and it makes me so fucking happy.  And I want to share it because maybe it will make other people happy too.  So I share it because I want other people to enjoy it and love it and be happy.   And I want to see them enjoy it, and know that they love it.   If I can make someone think, for even a few minutes, that this whole existence isn’t a total crock of shit, guess what?  More of that so-damn-hard-to-come-by joy.

Sometimes, I see that other people have found a thing.  Their thing.  That thing that makes them happy and makes them forget that this whole existence is a real crock of shit.  Sometimes it’s the same  as my thing, and sometimes it’s not.  It makes me happy to see that they have found their thing.  If they make a thing, I look at it.  Sometimes its a wonderful thing and I love it and it makes me happy, and I tell them I love it, and that makes them happy.  Sometimes its not a thing that I love.  Sometimes I just like it, or there are parts of it I like.  Because I know it’s their thing, I tell them what I liked about it.  And hopefully it makes them happy.  Sometimes it’s just something I don’t like at all, but because it’s their thing, and other people may love their thing, I just move along and leave them to it.

Inevitably there’s that one asshole who likes to go around and shit on other peoples things.  Sometimes they shit on my thing too.  Even though I’ve gotten better at dealing with someone shitting on my things than I have been in the past, not everybody can handle it when someone shits on their beloved thing - their source of so-damn-hard-to-come-by joy.  What’s the end result of having your thing shit on?  Boom.  End of joy.  This whole existence really is a crock of shit.  For some people (and I’ve been there) their thing is their only thing.  And it just got shit on. Their only source of so-damn-hard-to-come-by-joy doesn’t bring them joy any longer.

Maybe, if you’re a shitty asshole, you think its pretty sad and pathetic that a person’’s only thing is a game, book, song, food, whatever, and they deserve to have their thing shit on just for being so sad and pathetic.  Fuck you, shitty asshole.  Everyone has struggles.  Some more than others.  Sometimes their thing is the only thing that keeps them going.  It’s the only thing tethering them to this crock of shit existence.  I want them around, enjoying their thing and sharing their thing and spreading the so-damn-hard-to-come-by joy.  Every one deserves to have every bit of joy they can hold on to.  Don’t take that joy away, you shitty asshole.  It may be the only joy they have.

tl;dr - don’t be an asshole and shit on other peoples things.  It may be the only thing they have.

anonymous asked:

Are you friends with beth0725? She's so ugly and gross. She makes me want to vomit 🤢

Holy shit, YOU’RE STILL A THING?? I THOUGHT I GOT RID OF YOUR DUMBASS.

Listen here you fucking douchebag. You’re a disgusting prick and you clearly need to rethink your entire life if you believe such utter fallacies.

Beth is beautiful and courageous. She is smart and strong and ALL OF THE THINGS YOU WILL NEVER BE. She is kind. She is a friend that I do not deserve. She cares and fights for the things she believes in and is so kind even to those who don’t see her point of view.

Get your head out of your ass and see the truth motherfucker. You’re the piece of shit here, not Beth.

I’m not even going to tag her in this bullshit because she doesn’t deserve to give you the reaction you so clearly want.

And you don’t make me feel impossible. You don’t make me feel like I’m impossible to love and I cannot thank you enough for that. You could of loved anyone on this planet and you picked me and I cannot say how grateful I am for that. That you picked me. Me. Me. You picked me to love and I think that is the most magical thing ever. You picked to love my laugh and my obsession with animals. You picked me and you picked to love my love for books and all things nature. You picked to love my four year old boy laugh and my harshness when the world get’s to hard. You picked to love me and my pills that I take every day to battle clouds that seem to always follow me. You picked to love my scarred skin from night’s when everything got to much and you picked to love my stubbornness on what I want to eat for dinner. You picked to love my small hands and my small personality which you make me feel like it’s big and beautiful. You picked to love my 4 pm I love you’s and my 2 am I don’t want to be here’s. You picked to love my love for animals and homeless people and my uncontrollable laugh when you make a stupid joke. You picked to love my long brown hair and my dull brown eyes. You picked to love my love hate relationships with my mother and my sad life story. You picked to love me and you not only have made me feel loved, you have made me feel like I was beautiful when all I have ever felt my entire life was unworthy. You showed me that I did not need to live in a world of black and white and you opened my heart to color again and I cannot thank you enough for that but I’d like to start with our little “forever”. I hope you do too.
—  Thank you for loving me when I do not love myself. // Deeply Feeling Series 
I wish I knew the right words to say when it came down to writing about someone who makes you feel like flowers are growing inside of your chest. I wish I knew how to explain the way you make me feel when it’s two in the morning and we’re both laughing over something that probably wasn’t even that funny but to other people, our laughs make it seem like it was the world. I wish I knew how to tell people just how really beautiful you are, because when you are there, whether you’re laying down or pacing back and fourth, talking about the things that excite you the most, or just about anything in general that makes you happy, your eyes hold a certain kind of light beneath them that makes me want to never look away. Or when you laugh, my god, when you laugh, I never want it to stop because you do this thing where you tilt your head back and cover your mouth at the last moment after you already been so loud, shaking your head and every single time, I’d think, I wouldn’t mind hearing you laugh for the rest of my life. And when you yell, which is very rare, is scary because you can be there, veins standing at attention and I’d still think you’re the most beautiful person I have ever laid eyes on, even if I’m driving you insane. Don’t worry though, you drive me insane too. And I wish I knew how to explain the way my hands shake when I think about losing you, or the way my chest tightens to the thought of you being with someone else who isn’t me, because it messes with my mind sometimes and I get fustrated, because only I want to know your favorite book to the way you hate wearing that poka dot shirt, or how you eat when you’re nervous and can’t seem to stop making a mess. But you always been a messy eater so I don’t mind. I fell in love with you and although you are not perfect because you do have your moments, I promise I will love you again and again and again because I am not perfect either but if I am here, holding my heart out to you, and you are there, doing the same, I swear we both can be non-perfect messes together. And I’m trying not to be too cheesy here, because you always did say I buttered you up too much so for now I’ll leave it off with an I love you and an I’ll love you forever until my very last breath and an I am so lucky you decided to choose me.
—  A.M// to jake, maybe loving you isn’t so bad after all.

#buymelodramaonitunes

  • the reason melodrama is so complex is that it simultaneously celebrates and criticises parties as a place where the rules no longer apply 
  • parties give us an illusion of control? confined in the world of the party it’s all ‘our rules, our dreams’ and we are ‘kings and queens’
  • homemade dynamite is such a call to arms for our generation okay it feels like a metaphor for the potential we all have to create change 
  • but equally could be a metaphor for our self-destructive tendencies??? 
  • the louvre is beautiful because it glorifies the tiny beautiful moments, relationships that don’t last forever but are still beautiful and priceless and are still works of art - masterpieces and still good enough for the louvre
  • also this is a song about writing a love song? ‘broadcast the boom boom boom and make ‘em all dance to it’ that is literally the conventional role of pop music? 
  • okay but hear me out i think liability/hard feelings are two versions of the same story, liability immediately after the split and hard feelings in retrospect!!!!! there are so many parallels!!!
  • let go of this endless summer afternoon vs. every endless summer’s eating me alive 
  • well i guess i should go vs. well i guess i’ll go home 
  • big mistake of dancing in my storm vs.  how you’d dance for me 
  • i am obsessed with how sober ii explores the performance of being a young adult like ‘oh how fast the evening passes’ and the references to ‘champagne’ suggests some form of performed sophistication 
  • ‘we told you this was melodrama’ could play on this idea of performing a role, or alternatively could play on the way society views the lives of millennials - melodramatic and ridiculous!!!
  • ‘they’ll talk about us, all the lovers, how we kissed and killed each other’  reminds us that this is our legacy, this is how we live forever - it’s super self-reflective and seems to call on us to consider the mark we are leaving on the world BUT also ‘romanticises us making us the stuff of myth and legend, we are immortalised forever in our scandal 
  • writer in the dark!!!!! so like to begin with that double meaning - kissing her literally in the dark / kissing her while he kept her in the dark about how he really felt 
  • this is lorde’s ‘blank space’ revenge song okay fight me on this 
  • her secret power is being able to keep him forever bc she ‘locks him in her heart’ he’ll rue the day he kissed her because in doing so he sealed his fate!!!
  • this is actually REALLY CREEPY I WANT A CREEPY MUSIC VIDEO!!!!
  • okay so love of my life supercut: every chorus is like the actual supercut playing back all the good parts back - that sunny pre-chorus with the repetition, mirroring the idea of a highlights reel playing over and over again
  • but it’s also a metaphor for seeing a past relationship through rose-tinted glasses/the way nostalgia makes things beautiful - she is only remembering the beautiful parts
  • okay but the ultimate storyline of the album seems to be from green light, sober, homemade dynamite we get the impression that ‘all there is, is the party’, whereas liability reprise suggests that ‘maybe all this is the party’ which is such a beautiful and hopeful discovery for the album to make - leading straight into perfect places, which celebrates life with all it’s imperfections and flaws!!!

Pinky.

I remember all the promises we’ve made together—all the good things you’ve said that I thought would last forever. We were like kids writing our futures without knowing how time could change us—how the world will try to always make us reminisce the past. How the people around us will try to mold us into something we didn’t want.

Ring.

It was the different type of love. I don’t know if fate is real or if destiny confuses us about what we feel. But I always imagine you with me, and my heart beating with yours in symphony. It was the most beautiful song I’ve ever heard. The most wonderful feeling I couldn’t get tired of.

Middle.

There’s always something that goes in between. Pedestrians passing by— every time the traffic lights signal us to stop. When you were walking fast yet caught up behind someone who is walking slowly enough. When you already want to do the things you love, but you saw something that puts a doubt in your heart. When you thought you already found someone who you can’t enjoy living without.

Index.

I choose you over anything else, hoping that you’ll also end up picking me over everybody else. Yet I put a finger on your lips telling you to stop spreading all the sugar coated lies. I point to your chest, hoping for you to be honest. Darling I think I couldn’t take it anymore, if you continue to pretend that you still love me more.

Thumb.

Believe when I say that everything will be okay, even if it will take a lot of time for me to heal. In the end I will surely learn from all of this things. I will still carry the love I have somewhere inside me. Not for you, but for—each and every—broken part of me. This is how I should let go of you. One by one, I’ll remove my fingertips away from holding your hands. One by one I’ll let go of you so you can rest and breathe. Day by day, letting go will ease the pain.

And until my hands stop bleeding, my soul will suddenly appreciate the wonderful life I’m living. In the end my heart will learn how to love myself more—and will finally consider it as my home.

—  ma.c.a // I should stop holding on you
Here's the thing about shows like Sense8...

It’s not mainstream. It’s not cookie cutter. Strong female leads. Compassionate male leads. Heroic poc leads. Multiple healthy lgbt relationships. Cultures around the world being respected and celebrated. Without a doubt, we should see these things regularly in media, but we don’t. And that’s why Sense8 was set up to fail.

It was exploring stories most shows wouldn’t dare touch. Those of us here on tumblr see the need for that. We crave that. But Amy from down the street doesn’t like change. Greg from work likes detective shows. Diane from church is telling everyone to boycott that show because it’s from the devil. And those are just the people who heard of the show… It doesn’t get promotion ads during The Walking Dead. It doesn’t come on directly after Grey’s Anatomy. It doesn’t even come on a channel so that people might accidentally switch over and be captivated by its beauty.

The burden of promotion fell on Netflix. They want to claim it was too expensive. That there weren’t enough viewers to offset the cost of production. And I’m sure that’s true, but whose fault was that?

I learned about Sense8 through friends from here, where a show like Sense8 is accepted and even celebrated. Unless I actively sought out information about the show, I didn’t see anything about it on any other social media sites. I’ve seen people talk about Stranger Things, OitNB, Making a Murder, etc. all over the place, but silence when it came to Sense8.

When I think about why, the answer is pretty clear: Netflix didn’t bother to promote their own show. I don’t have cable, which means I spend a decent amount of time on Netflix, but I never saw Sense8 on the main screen. It wasn’t in my suggestions even though it is very much in line with my “type” of show. It didn’t pop up in the new arrivals sections. Hell, after I started watching it, I would often have to dig for it in my recently watched section. Even when it was the last show I watched, it would get booted to the end of the line.

Netflix took a show with the odds stacked against it from the get go and did absolutely nothing to promote it. With this type of show, word of mouth is key. It has to be promoted enough not just to pique interest but to demand viewership. They needed to shove that show down everyone’s throats the way they do with OitNB or Stranger Things or even shows that aren’t even their own like Riverdale. But they didn’t.

This is on Netflix. They failed to help a beautiful and captivating and thought-provoking show thrive. They gave up on it when it deserved so much more. And I will be bitter about it for the rest of my life.

My dear lgbt+ kids,

Asexuality is defined by something you do not feel - and that can make it a very confusing thing! 

“Asexuals don’t feel sexual attraction” sounds simple - but what even is sexual attraction? How can you know if you’ve never felt it?

This dilemma is one of the reasons many people have not “always known” they’re asexual. If you have no idea what sexual attraction is (because you’ve never felt it), it’s very easy to assume that this thing you do feel is probably sexual attraction. 

This thing might be: libido, arousal, romantic attraction, aesthetic attraction.. 

But the truth is that asexual people can (and many do) feel all those things - and are still asexual! 

It can be hard to slap a definition on such things because they’re such “blurry”, hard-to-grasp concepts but I’ll try to write down some (simplified) definitions to help you distinguish between them: 

Sexual attraction is “Wow, I want to have sex with that person.” 

Romantic attraction is “Wow, I want to have a romantic relationship with that person”. 

Aesthetic attraction is “Wow, that person is beautiful to me” 

Libido is “Wow, my body wants to have sex right now” 

Arousal is “Wow, my body is reacting to stimulation” (This stimulation might be sexual touch or sexual thoughts but can also be non-sexual touch or thoughts that trigger a physical reaction “down there”) 

Asexual people don’t feel sexual attraction but can feel any or even all of the other things - It doesn’t make you any less asexual if you do! <3 

With all my love, 

Your Tumblr Mom 

Magical Uses For Mint

I know I say it probably way too many times, but to me, Mint is the Salt of the herb world.
Here are some of my fave things to do with it!

  • Make Mint Tea! Get a tea strainer or a small sachet bag and chop up some Mint into them. Swirl that baby around in hot, not boiling, water and add sugar if you want! This drink can be made magical by adding intent to it such as wanting protection throughout the day, or to bring luck to you!
  • T H E B A T H. (Fuck, i’m not over that meme) You can add mint to your bath to attract beauty and luck to yourself. I find Mint works well with Roses in a bath!
  • Mint Protection Jar! Find some Mint, add them leaves to a jar, fill it with some rain water or sea water and bam! Basic Protection jar! You can add other herbs or sigils to it to increase it’s power, if you want.
  • Mint plants are so easy to grow and propagate, i want 10 of them.
  • Personal Growth Spell. Find a Mint plant, get a small piece of paper and hang it off a sturdy part of the plant, ask the plant if it will let you grow with it.
  • Mint can be used in break up spells for couples that need a fresh start.
  • Some negative entities hate the smell of fresh mint.
  • Remember that Mint Tea? Add it to your mop bucket and get mopping! That Mint will cleanse your home and make it smell nice.
  • Carry a few Mint leaves in your pocket or wallet to bring good luck and prosperity.
  • Tip that my nan taught me. Hang Mint leaves over a doorway to prevent arguments.
  • Mint leaves under a pillow are said to bring prophetic dreams.
  • Mint can be used in healing spells!