i want to do this to so many people

dianartemiss  asked:

"Those messages do not make me mad because I genuinely believe they are sent with good intent." You saying that literally just improved my night so much. I have unfollowed so many bloggers for publicly dragging innocent people who were just trying to be helpful and that whole trend makes my skin crawl. idk, I just wanted to say thank you for being a force for good when it comes to advice and just in general. I really appreciate it.

Aw, thank you, that’s really kind of you to say. I try very hard to not snip at people if I can avoid it, though I will say I know where other bloggers are coming from when they do snap and reply more meanly than is perhaps warranted.

A lot of us are on our absolute last nerve when it comes to certain things, and after a while everything seems like bullshit. It can feel like you’re not being listened to when you have to repeat yourself over and over and over, or when you’re dealing with people being deliberately obtuse to try and get a rise out of you, and unfortunately the people just trying to help can get caught in the crossfire.

There was a time when me endlessly having to repeat myself or validate myself to others, would have resulted in an absolute meltdown. And some days, especially when I’ve had people being deliberately obtuse for funsies or my inbox is just full of shit, the temptation to throw a wobbler is absolutely still there. 

But after some years of processing my anger, I have come to realize that a lot of what people do or say that might be annoying me, isn’t meant to be, and sometimes I’m able to just happily go on repeating myself and move on to the next thing. And sometimes I have to get up and walk away from the computer because I have reached my capacity for patience that day.

And that’s okay. It’s okay to get up and walk away. It’s certainly better than making someone else feel awful. And if I have the energy when I get back to the computer, I’ll either address it or move on.

Which is usually when you see me blogging into the void, pointing out the things that people do that are dick moves while never actually tagging someone. A) because however annoying someone is being they don’t deserve tumblr dog piling them and b) A lot of the time it’s something a lot of people do unthinkingly, and me drawing attention to it in a non antagonizing way will hopefully get people to think about it, self reflect and maybe modify their behavior.

 Which isn’t to say I don’t throw shade when I have to with certain people. But for the most part I try to keep that to a minimum. It’s less exhausting for me to believe that people mean well, than to believe that they don’t.

When you get overwhelmed you just need to stop.

I see so many people blogging about their life doing 101 things and I think wow they are so impressive. Right now I’m studying for my masters full time (40-45 hours a week), working part time (20 hours a week), volunteering once a week, trying to apply for a scholarship for funding my Bar course next year and still trying to go to the gym and feel good. Yesterday it all got a bit too much, I want to post this because maybe you need the reminder that we are not superhuman and we can only do so much. 

I am currently trying to get my references together for my application and I emailed my old boss yesterday and he basically said no, HR only give out generic references. I was walking home from a long day at uni and basically just cried when I got in. I’ve been feeling so inadequate and overwhelmed lately that was the last thing. i just questioned how hard I had worked for him last year and how it’s so irrelevant to him because I was just a commodity. Stressing about my references, in addition to everything else I just couldn’t deal with it anymore. 

I am so lucky to have some wonderful people in my life and I called them and they just listened and talked through it with me. I woke up today and I cleaned my flat, washed my sheets and sat down to write this post. I need a good, clean environment in order to be productive especially if my mind is a bit of a mess at the moment. 

To anyone balancing work and life and friends and working out, whatever you are doing please remember that firstly wow amazing that you are doing so much but also give yourself a break. I think I’ve been putting too much pressure on myself and stressing myself out talking to other students (who are juts os fucking impressive I can’t even) and that is making me worry more. Remember to recognise how much you’re taking on and always consider your mental healthy before anything else. Yes like can test and challenge us but we need to keep ourselves in check and if things are getting to much walk away from the table and take a break. 

My friend sent me this quote and I thought it was so beautiful ‘I survived because the fire inside me burned brighter than the fire around me’ - Joshua Graham. 

2

“I can’t do this right now, my mind won’t stop racing…..” Louise moved to the window to distract herself. Meditation was never “her thing”, but wanted to try it to at least see if she could quieten her mind…or was it her heart?. “I can’t just turn myself off….I’m..I’m….not you….”

“Teach me not to feel, Sybok. I want to be like you….nothing bothers you, you don’t get swamped by your feelings. It must be easy being Vulcan. Easier than being human that’s for sure…..”

“Before the Teachings of Surak our feelings ruled our lives and caused great conflict and many deaths. We learnt to control our emotions so they did not control us. That does not mean we do not feel Louise….a common misconception of my people unfortunately. This is why I asked you to join me today, pacification of emotion through meditation. At no time should one try to suppress or hide an emotion. Our teaching is to come to terms with what you are feeling and thus to overcome it.”

“Well it isn’t working.” she huffily replied and sat back down in front of him.

“The method is not an instant solution to all emotional problems. It will take time, it will not be easy and often one will fail, but it is a tool. Do you wish to discuss your thoughts. I find humans have a preference for “talking it out”.”

“No, I’ll be fine. I’m sorry, you went to so much effort for me today and I kinda feel bad about it now, ungrateful even.”

“There is no offense where none is taken. I have noticed your conflict of late and the last two assignments we have worked on you have been distracted. However, I will not pry further, if you need to discuss whatever is troubling you…..I am here to listen.”

“I didn’t know you cared.”

“Of course I care Louise. Over the last 5 months we have spent a great deal of time together. Though our relationship is on a professional level for the most part, I do find your company agreeable.”

“You said I use to many superfluous words and have a predisposition to ramble!!” 

“You do, but I never said I did not enjoy it, or you.” Sybok smiled slightly at his admission and at Lou’s reaction to it. “If you could see the expression on your face at this present moment, it is what I would describe as “aghast with confusion”. He positioned himself back on his stool and closed his eyes. Louise followed suit, but naturally, kept on rambling.

“You should do that more often.”

“What?”

“Smile, I like your smile, it’s a good smile, for a Vulcan.”

“Vulcans do not smile.” he replied coolly.

“You do, not always, but you do smile. Countless times. I’ve seen it”

“Then I must only do it when I am with you Louise.” 

JUST A MATTER OF DECENCY

I’ve been silent up till now, but i think it’s the time for me, as AeF’s admin, to say something.
I started AeF scanlations team 4 years ago and with the help of VK’s ending, that was really disappointing, there was no one willing to help us with VK’s special chapters translations. It was hard for us to find a translator but we wanted to provide a service to the fandom no matter what, because despite everything we really enjoyed (and we still do) Vampire Knight’s story.

We have been here for a very long time, for 4 years as i said before, and despite we went through hard times sometimes, despite so many people left us, we are still here with a wonderful staff that we put together with so many difficulties.

I saw just yesterday that we have now two new scanlations team. Yeah, two. I’m fine with this, really.
Having more translations, having releases faster than ours is appreciated and i think it’s useful to the fandom. Even in the past there was two different teams working on Vampire Knight and all of us inside the fandom was fine with this.

There’s just one thing, or two, i’m not okay with.
But first there’s a point that i want to highlight. We have been always putting our effort in order to release a proper translation, and we need time to do it. Yeah, because in addiction to a translator we have a proofreader from japanese as well. Our proofreader checks every single word, every single sentence, just because she is well aware that VK is a delicate matter. For each proofreadings, in fact, she always provides us a “vocabulary”, where she explains her corrections, her choices, and what “thorny” kanjis mean. In addiction to this there’s the fact that each of us has his own real life. I really feel in the position to defend my own staff because i was hit where it hurts. Just because we seem slow this doesn’t mean that we really are. It’s just that we want to do a proper job. You can check yourself how accurate our translations are, just buy the first volume of Vampire Knight Memories and see that we have always released unbiased translations (because, you know, both the translator and the proofreader have nothing to do with the fandom). You will be able to do the same when the second volume will be released. And when i say this  i’m talking especially with these new groups.
Now, that being said, i really hope that there are people out there that will keep enjoying our translations because i can assure that we have always been working with our whole heart.
But now let’s talk about what really upset me.

What upsets me is the timing. Just when a controversial chapter comes out, just when the zeki is starting to become solid, just when there is a new war inside the fandom with new factions, we get two other scanlations group. Two, at the same time. Of course this is not a coincidence. I suspect that they are doing it for the controversy, not for the fandom and this is what annoy me the most. The fandom surely needs more translations but the ship war should not have an impact on them, this is what i truly believe.

Lastly, what bothered me is seeing the other team’s one online, on magafox for example. To me this is playing dirty . I’m not saying readers online are our property, but uploading every chapters online is what we’ve always been doing. It’s just a matter of decency towards our staff that was properly convenient for you all till now.

If you’ll threw the guantlet down i don’t have any intention to take up it. We will keep doing our job as usual with our head held high.

anonymous asked:

Alright, that's Dark and Will checked off from the list, now...we need Anti's backstory!...JACK YOU BEST BE PAYING ATTENTION TO THIS!!!

I even made a post saying something along those lines, but honestly, let’s not pressure Jack into doing something he doesn’t want to or can’t do.

WKM took WEEKS and MONTHS to finish. The final product is probably (in my opinion) one of the greatest series on the entire channel, and took SO much time, effort, and more effort by many, many people to complete.

Now, we do have hints that Anti’s backstory is indeed tragic. Many hints, if you look close enough, but Jack keeps a tight lid on his personal views of Anti b/c he enjoys seeing OUR views, theories, and guesses with the character.

To have it all laid out for us in a video may ruin the mystery, and WKM was so brilliant to show the setup and not revealing/ confirming til the last scene that it was an origin story. Expecting Jack to pull off something similar to WKM isn’t fair to him- I’m not saying he CAN’T someday do it, but don’t underestimate the amount of effort it took to plan, shoot, and edit WKM in the first place.

Now do I want more info to be hinted or even shown to us dealing with Anti’s own origins/ backstory? Heck yeah.

But at the same time, I kinda like not knowing, the ambiguity of it is still intriguing- and I enjoy seeing everyone’s theories while there are no canon answers (at least… not yet).

Before You Get a Tarot Reading

As many of you know, I offer tarot readings to anyone who wants one (prices are listed in the blog description.) I love doing readings for other people. I feel a great connection to helping others understand themselves, their situations or their place in the world through divination. You can see examples of some of my readings under the ‘tarot readings’ tag. I put a lot of energy and time into each reading I do and really like to form a relationship with each querent so that I can give the most accurate and detailed reading. 

This post is all about what you should know before I do a reading for you. It might be a little long, but I can assure you that you’ll know how to word your questions for the deck, what I will and won’t answer as well as more info about me as a reader and you’ll be all set to get your reading done. 

How long have you been reading? 

  • About a year, though I studied tarot and have had an active interest in it for much longer. 

How wold you describe your reading style? 

  • Intuitive and in-depth, though the focus will always be on what you, the querent, can do or focus on, and less about giving yes or no answers or predicting your future.  I’ve never been really comfortable with prediction readings since there are so many variables in life. 

What decks do you have available to do readings with? 

  • I have The Wild Unknown and The Ostara Tarot. Both are tagged as their titles so you can see what each looks like and if you feel a connection to one over the other. 

What sort of personality or styles do your decks have? 

  • The Wild Unknown tends to be a bit blunt, sassy, very wise, and I get an ‘older’ energy from it. If it were a person, it would be your sassy grandma who knows her stuff, tells it like it is and isn’t afraid to ask what the heck you’re doing. Great for if you’re feeling stuck , unmotivated and need a kick in the butt, or completely lost about direction. 
  • The Ostara Tarot is more whimsical, intuitive and is generally a little more gentle with it’s delivery. Less literal and with a younger energy. If it was a person, it’d be that beautiful, super enigmatic person that’s in your art class with a ton of talent and seems to know everything, but is also on the shy and empathetic side, so they’re not going to give unsolicited advice or be rude about anything they’re saying. Great for when you’re hurting, when you need reassurance or when you’re not up for a kick to the butt.

I saw a spread I really like on your blog or somewhere else online. Can you do that spread for me? 

  • It depends. Some creators of spread do not like the spreads that they’ve crafted to be monetized (i.e. I wouldn’t be able to charge for them.) But many spread are free to use however I see fit as a reader. I would also want to know what you’re looking to get out of the reading so that I can see if this spread fits what you want to know well. So as long as the creator is okay with people monetizing their spreads, and we’ve worked out a price (since most are more than 3 cards) then I’ll definitely do that spread for you! 

How to word your questions for my decks: 

Questions that begin with ‘what’ or ‘how’ are generally best. And always ask things that focus on you, as the querent. So instead of asking ‘How does this person feel about me?’ instead ask ‘How can I improve my relationship with this person?’ 

Some examples of common questions that are good: 

  • What should I focus on today (or in whatever time period) to be successful? - How can I stop hurting/hurt less? (from a breakup, mental illness, career related hardships, etc) 
  • What is the potential for this relationship? 
  • What can I do to keep this good financial luck coming?
  • How can I bring new people into my life who will be good for me? 
  • How can I distance myself from this person? 
  • How can I achieve success in this endeavour?
  • What can I do to bring some financial gain my way? 

Thing not to ask:

  •  Yes/no questions are not great. My decks don’t like them and tend to give overly vague responses to them. Same goes for questions beginning with ‘Should I..’ as they generally are yes/no answers. 
  • Any question that you could easily get the answer to by asking the person it involves is a no go. I don’t feel comfortable prying into someone else’s thoughts and feelings without their consent and involvement in the reading. If you want to know what someone will do or how they feel, just ask them yourself. 
  • My decks aren’t great at giving ‘when’ answers. Timeframes can vary greatly depending on your own actions in the situation. 
  • Health  related readings that start with ‘will I’ or ‘do I.’ I’m not a doctor, my cards are not doctors and while they may be able to guide you on how best to care for your body, they cannot diagnose you or anyone else. 

Some examples that I will not answer, and alternatives that work instead:

  •  Does this person love me? 
    • Instead try ‘What is the potential of my relationship with this person and how can I reach it?‘ 
  •  Will this person leave me?    
    • Instead try ‘How can I improve my relationship with this person?’ or ‘How can I help this person feel appreciated?' 
  • How does this person feel about me?  
    • Instead try ‘What can I do to help this person feel comfortable enough to tell me how they feel?’ 
  • What kind of health problem do I have?    
    • Instead try ‘What can I do to improve my health?’ 

And a couple with really no alternative question that I could ask:

  • Will I win the lottery? 
  • When will I die? 
  • Am I pregnant?

That’s about it for what you need to know before getting a reading! Please, if you have anything I should add to this list, let me know!

anonymous asked:

I've read Shoma's words, that he doesn't want to be choreographed by anyone other than Mihoko Higuchi. This kind of hurts, because I really love his EX by David Wilson and I think working with other choreographers would help him broaden his expression. Why do you think he dislikes the thought of cooperation with other people so much?

i think he holds mihoko in very high regard, since he has worked with her since childhood, and she has given him many good programs before. she understands how he operates, whereas working with a different choreographer involves getting to know a different person. i also get the feeling that he doesn’t take an active role in his skating and leaves most of the planning up to his coaches. i think the only way he’ll get competitive programs from other choreographers is if mihoko herself convinced him to do it. will she ever? i don’t know. i wish he would work with other choreographers, i wish he would take a more active role, it frustrates me that he hasn’t. i can only hope that after the olympic season, when there’s less at stake, he and his coaches will step outside the box and take a risk. i don’t care if it doesn’t work out in the end, i just want him to at least try. mihoko is not a bad choreographer, but i think pushing shoma outside his comfort zone will help him grow in the long run.

heartliketwigs  asked:

You post so many great quotes and I often want to search out the original poems. Do you have any websites or links to share where we can read more? Anything you could tell us would be so great! Thank you!! 💜

Thank you. <3 

I link a substantial percentage of the books and poetry I quote from in the post ‘source’. I unfortunately can’t link put small press/lit journal links within the post due to Tumblr’s strict rules regarding links.

On the permalink/quote page on desktop you should be able to find the link to the original poem/book if it’s not explicitly linked within the post.

On your dash and on my blog in mobile if not linked within the post it should be linked in the source.

so i want to try something, an ‘experiment’ that will actually help people rather than hurt them. i want to see how far this post can get and how much positivity it can spread. HERE’S THE CHALLENGE: if you see this, contact a few people and let them know how important they are to you, say something nice about them, wish them a good day, etc. you don’t have to include any reference to this post, just send them a nice message. and if you feel comfortable doing so, reblog this so other people will see it and send others positive messages. the ‘experiment’ part of this little project is in seeing how far these messages can get. i’m in a relatively small fandom, so i want to see how many fandoms this can get to, how many people this can reach with the intention of spreading happiness. because we need good, helpful things, not negative ——and i hope this post may actually do some good.

ghosheart  asked:

Hey uh thisle? I want to ask about how the thorn problem is going. I know it's a touchy subect, but people do care about it. Anyways, any recent headaches? And if so, how many minutes/hours/days between them?

“Well uh… Got a pretty nasty one i’d say about.. two weeks ago? Luckily Gear wasn’t there to see it cause he was out gettin groceries. Lasted about two hours I think? I dunno.” 

To the reviewer of Just A Little of that Human Touch on AO3 who wrote:

YES YES YES to your portrayal of Alderaan as a liberal feminist society with sex education and Leia being a crusader of that! THIS feels real. THIS feels like the kind of society Breha Organa and Leia by extension would have cultivated. 

I already thanked you for your review, but I wanted to add (and the comment box on AO3 didn’t feel like it was the right place to do so)-

A lot of time we fanfic authors borrow from Earth and its history as we conceptualize societies in the GFFA. There’s a lot of fun royal customs that people like to explore in relation to Alderaan. A lot of us grew up reading about the British monarchy and other European monarchies (what can I say, a lot of us are nerds! Raise your hands if you read those Royal Diaries books growing up? Other historical fiction dealing with this stuff? How many we got in the house?), and that seems to have inspired a lot of Alderaanian customs in fic, which is cool!  

Personally I’m interested in how Alderaan as a matriarchal planet with at least a traditionally female power structure (although I like headcanons that Alderaan moved long ago towards a real gender equality model rather than actually denying men opportunities, including to rule!) might differ from a lot of the patriarchal monarchies in our Western history. Virginity and female-centered sexual purity focus makes a lot more sense when the heir of the throne needs to be related to the King (and the heir of any given family needs to be related to the father); much less so when traditionally the heir needs to be related to the Queen (and the heir of any given family related to the mother- if Alderaan even has such a concept of family heirs!). And then of course with Leia’s open adoption (in the sense that the people know about it- and I think they must because she is not the same ethnicity as her parents, although I’ve seen some takes on it where its like an open/fake secret that work well), that seems to indicate modern-day Alderaan may not give an F about biological lineage anyway. Which I think also says some things about the society and how it views sex and reproduction. 

That, combined with our knowledge of Alderaan as a place that puts such a high degree of value on education (and a good sexual education is an important part of ensuring people have access to all those other kinds of higher education, as babies too early really can make that so much harder) as well as the value the society places on art and, in my head canon at least, the well-being of children (parents having children too early is also associated with very poor outcomes for children; parents having unstable or abusive relationships also is associated with very poor outcomes for children)- well, it just makes sense to me that Alderaan would care deeply about good sexual education that involves, as Leia said, not just contraception but things like healthy relationship skills. Important elements that are too often left out of a discussion of practices that take place in the context of relationships! 

So yes, I agree that this approach seems to fit Bail and Breha’s personalities well (and Leia’s for that matter!), but also think that this is the kind of society that likely shaped those personalities, you know? 

And of course Leia never shies away from pushing envelopes galaxy-wide, and supporting such an organization would (hopefully- although fascist regimes get weird about this sort of thing!) be a way for her to advocate for something she believes in that is valuable, and, while pushing the envelope, actually do-able (as opposed to openly advocating for overthrowing the Empire).

I received an anon message about how I was ruining Star Wars and Star Wars fanfiction with my naked sociopolitical agenda, and how its absurd to apply Earth morality to Star Wars in- any? such a?- way. At the time I didn’t want to post it, but it seems relevant to mention here. Honestly, what “hurts”- other than the fact that someone felt the need to go out of their way to share this opinion with me without signing their name- is that it implies I have no “legitimate” thought process behind this choice for the story. I believe that I have sound reasons why I think Alderaan was this way. Sure, it’s in line with my own points of view- but that’s in part because I think Alderaan is intended by George Lucas to be a beacon of democratic values under a repressive regime, and a symbol of all that is nurturing in the Galaxy, and to me that fits with these ideas. Other people may disagree with my interpretation of Alderaan, as well as how democratic values and a value placed on life would translate into sexual mores. Other people do disagree, and write it differently! That’s fine. But I don’t feel that I’m drawing it out of nowhere. And as usual, this is only a critique when the Earth morality we’re drawing from is “progressive”- no one feels the need to go into the inbox of authors who wrIte about Alderaanian courtiers planning to check Leia’s hymen before her wedding night to tell them not to project specific Earth cultural practices onto the GFFA.  Their incorporation of Earth history is seen as well thought-out, valuable, and detailed world-building; mine is considered a cheap trick. 

And no one should go bother those writers either! Their stories have something to offer, just as I believe mine does. (And I know fanfiction is free, amateur authors, blah blah blah- but honestly, fanfiction being free isn’t the primary reason to behave supportively and decently toward people who make themselves available on the internet. Sure, you can post a negative review of Claudia Gray’s books on your own blog- and sure, you really should not do that with fanfiction, because its unnecessarily mean for people who hare having fun in their free time and doing what’s meaningful to them- but its still rude to go to Claudia Gray directly and tell her she’s ruining Han and Leia, or Star Wars, or how much you hated her stuff! Direct-to-author contact should always be polite, whatever the context.) I believe strongly that everyone should be able to bring whats interesting and meaningful to them to the stories they want to tell in fanfiction, and I personally think there should be room for both approaches!

From my perspective, there has been a lot of handwringing lately about fanfic being ruined by “overly political” agendas and about authors (mis?)using Han and Leia to work out “ideas about female empowerment.” (Although perhaps that perspective is colored by the anon message!) I’d be lying if I said that didn’t dull my enthusiasm about writing Han and Leia, period- no matter how light or fluffy or smutty or “divorced from real-life”. Because even if my past pieces are not considered to fall into that category, that atmosphere makes me feel stifled, like I’m no longer writing for me but like I’m writing to prove that I am still valuable in this community by coloring in the right lines. So while the entire bones of the story were written in August, as I “colored it in”, it did come to include more sociopolitical elements than I originally conceived of it having. I only did so in ways, however, that I felt enhanced the human story at the core, rather than took away from it. They came to me naturally, organically, as the story unfolded, rather than me sitting back and trying to find places to jam them in. Another kind reviewer whose words are etched in my heart noted that “it’s all the details that really make it, that tell the story,” and while she was referring to things like body language, I like to think that these details were no less a part of that, and added to rather than drew from the story. Otherwise, I wouldn’t have included them. People may of disagree about whether or not I succeeded, and its possible that my own skill deficit was part of that! But, while I may have failed, I don’t like the idea that they couldn’t have been included in such a story in a way that was relevant. 

I do affectionately like to think of this- even if I am being somewhat tongue-in-cheek/ironic- as my “political screed” fic, because a) I recognized upfront that I was powerless to stop it from being taken that way, even if I took out every possibly “political” element, simply because it involved Leia having previous partners; b) it’s as “political” as I think I’m capable of getting, which is to say (to me)- not very!  its a story about the characters above everything, so it gave me a chuckle to call it political; c) it was a way to prepare myself for a comment like the one I received, which I thought was probably inevitable; and d) it was my way of proving to myself that I did not need to live in fear of writing a “wrong” fic and being tossed out on my ass. I can continue to write whatever is meaningful to me and take whatever response I get. If many people don’t want to read it but are still down to read my other stuff, that’s great! If some people don’t want a voice like mine around at all, its better that I know that now rather than worrying about it for the next eight months before finally gathering the courage to publish a prompt I promised to write for a friend, and having my heart broken all over again after spending a lot of time and energy mending it.

And honestly, the overall response has just been so heartening. So many people have recognized it as fundamentally a story about Han and Leia connecting with each other and it just warms me to my toes to hear that it resonated. The recipient who it was for was thrilled to see some of her own headcanons included too, so I feel like I’ve done my job and gained a meaningful writing experience (that prompt- “and we never talked after that”- was really hard to right a nice, hopeful Han/Leia story for!).

So thanks, dear reviewer(s), and I hope I added something interesting to your comments about Alderaan!  💚💙💚💙

Just a friendly reminder guys that it’s okay to feel a lil sad about not meeting Taylor. We all want it so bad and like right away but I PROMISE and I pray that it will happen for so many of you because Taylor is just doing SO much to try and make it happen; she’s not going the extra mile she’s running from heaven and back 10 times over trying to find ways to meet as many of us as possible. Yes secret sessions are great and we should all be supportive and be happy for all the amazing people who are getting to go to them but please pleasseee remember that you don’t have to be at a secret session to meet Taylor and have an amazing unforgettable experience. I genuinely believe in my heart that you guys will all have your chance at meeting Taylor and it will be magical and unforgettable and all you have hoped for and exactly when you need it and it’s okay if it takes a little time because trust me when it happens it will be more than worth the wait. Although we should celebrate everyone tonight it’s okay to let yourself feel what your feeling and don’t let anyone undermine your emotions because it really is okay but just don’t lose hope!!

Please, don’t cry over this. I don’t like it when people cry, and it makes me feel bad. I’m just extremely stressed and I want to get this out. Also, I want to apologize to the people out there who are offended by this.

There are so many things I want to apologize for. So many things. People tell me, “You beat yourself up too hard.” I do, trust me, I do. But, some things I regret I almost instantly take back. The point is I feel like I’m annoying everybody. With my words. My actions. Everything. I feel like I’m nothing to society. People tell me, “They have work to do.” But, what if they didn’t? I constantly remind myself, each and every single day, that no matter how many times I text that I should just stop. My mind says, “You’re annoying them.” I’ll scream back, saying maybe that they’re just bored to text back. But no. Voices. Upon thousands of voices fill my mind, screaming, saying,

“You’re worthless! Why would they answer someone like you?”

“They’re just annoyed by you.”

“They’re screaming at you! They’re telling you to shut up!”

“They’re not working, they’re just annoyed by your antics!”

“SHUT UP, YOU’RE WORTHLESS, NOBODY CARES ABOUT YOU.”

Shut up. The one word that had affected me my whole life. I’m kinda like Richie. The way he just doesn’t shut up. Constantly talking. I feel like that. That society screams at me to just shut up. Texting is the one thing I’m kinda addicted too. Every day people say, “Yeah, I’ve got something to do, see ya.” And I completely understand that. It’s just that feelings start to build in me after a few days pass. Will they ever answer me? Will they just ignore me? Will they just tell me lies? Will they..

I’m frightened.

Scared even.

By the fact that people just, hate me.

That’s the reason I came here. To be free.

The society that I joined. The IT society is one of the best things I’ve ever exprienced. Everyone is so nice to each other. They respect each other, one way or another, and that is what I loved about it. I PM a lot of people too. They were all so nice. So kind with their words. But, I was still frightened.

Then, one day, some of them disappeared.

I began to fear that they hated me, I started to beat myself up again.

I wanted to scream, scream to the world to notice me.

But I never did get noticed.

I was afraid that, the people I walked with, made friends with, made conversations with..

Texted with, pm with…

I was afraid of being hated all over again.

@eddiekaspbraks @violetlovesherdaddyclown @robertgray-aka-pennywise @27floats-later @stanthemansuris @pennywisewinter @brvndneweyes @pennywisedaddywise @beep-beep-reddie @flowercrown-waltz @fittlestix @danciingclxwn @sugarcopic @richies-spaghetti

anonymous asked:

Hope this ask isn't a bother to you but I just feel a lil down and you seems like a nice artist to talk about this stuff ; - ; How to deal with that awful feeling you get, when you work really hard on a drawing but noone even look at it? Tbh I don't even want to say this to anyone as it's pretty much just me being whiny. Tho I need a just a lil advice so I won't stop drawing completely as it's basically the only thing I know how to do and I enjoy every second of it really ;w;

what do you mean by no one? if you mean not seen as many people as you want then… you just gotta learn to suck it up. thats the only thing i can say because thats how i dot it. dwelling into sadness because a picture didnt get the attention i was expecting is kinda a waste of time for me so i just keep up drawing more. but be aware that i just draw as a hobby so im  not sure if im in any position to be giving this kinda advice hah. 

what im saying is that even if you get sad you shouldnt get stuck in that one mood forever if you truly want to get better. if is too much pressure for you then just take a break.

A message to fatphobic blogs

I’m gonna be very honest and if you don’t like it, well, sucks for you.

You are not helping.

At all.

Your condescending remarks, stereotyped assumptions, and downright insults is doing nothing to make fat people healthier. Weight is not a black and white issue. There are many more things that cause weight gain than just laziness and overeating like you so want to believe.

Not everyone can afford a gym membership. Poverty is a thing and if a homeless person was to get up and exercise, there’s the risk that their belongings will get stolen. And there’s lower class people who have trouble even affording basic things like food and shelter, despite working 2 or 3 jobs. (Why am I mentioning this? Because gasp! Its almost like not everyone living in poverty is thin!)

Mental illness is a thing. Depression, anxiety, bipolar, etc can make it near impossible to do the things you seem simple.

Developmental disorders are also a thing. Executive dysfunction is a common symptom of ADHD and autism. Its basically knowing you have to do something but your brain lacks the directions to do it.

Eating disorders are a thing too. Binge eating disorder is a disorder where the sufferer overeats usually out of their own control.

Physical disabilities: not everyone has the ability to move like an able bodied person.

Medications can also cause weight gain. Like a close friend of mine explained, some medications can cause irreversible weight gain. So as you can see, sometimes weight doesn’t just roll off your belly.

When you comment on fatspo posts, or just posts about plus-sized to experiences, when you just throw your assumptions at them, when you insult their intelligence based on nothing but their weight, when you insult a fat person’s selfie just because you don’t like how fat they are, not only are your arguments lazy and inaccurate, you are not helping to stop obesity at all. You are not encouraging exercise and a healthy lifestyle.

You are willfully ignoring the issues above. You are telling mentally ill people, physically disabled people, people with legit eating disorders, autistic people and people with ADHD that their problems that effect their daily lives don’t matter. You are telling them that they are just lazy and taking the easy way out. You are actively and shamelessly contributing to not only the body shaming but the ableism they have faced their entire lives. You are contributing to their self-hatred that is already there.

If none of this is enough to reach your thick skulls(which I doubt it will), then you’re a classist and ableist asshole and I hope no fat, neurodivergent, physically disabled person ever has the misfortune of meeting you. I don’t know what else to tell you.

(If someone feels I’ve described the above inaccurately, or has a better way to describe any of the above better than I can, please feel free to reblog and comment because I am shit at putting words together haha)

BERNARDTASK002: It’s been a while, so how about a task. As per usual, these are not mandatory. This one has two options for two different kinds of people, but you can choose to do both if you’d like. Here are your choices. 

  • Make aesthetics/graphics. As many as you’d like. They can be about Bernard as a whole, about Greenmount, about your own character or about a relationship with someone. If you’d like, you can post them in BERNARD:EDIT and I’ll reblog them on my personal/muse blog to show off the talent that we have here at Bernard!
  • If you’re not so great with graphics or you also want to do this as well, make a character playlist! Use Spotify or whatever you have available. Even just links to YouTube videos are fine. It’s up to you how you do it. You can also make playlists for the university, town or roleplay as a whole. You can even make them about character relationships, as well! Go wild. 

Tag these with BERNARD:TASK002. I’d love to see your work. 

To the 2502 Ujungs and 50 porn bots following this blog:

Thank you so much for loving WJSN and tolerating my screaming in the tags!!! It seems a bit materalistic of me to be looking at follows, I know, but I really do appreciate it when people put up with me and my terrible posts. So many of you are so sweet and I hope you all have a wonderful day!! Feel free to message me whenever you want about whatever!

anonymous asked:

I really wanna have sex but I'm nervous about how so many people get attatched to their first partner. I don't want to feel broken but I also don't want to stay a virgin forever...

idk how tru that virgin shit is b/c i literally forget abt my first time all the time like who is he??? idk just do whatever ur comf with tbh 

youtube

I found this interview on youtube…
I have to talk about something that really shocked me!
These many negative comments on the interview!
I wish I had not read… I want to ignore it, but it’s hard.
If you do not like a person, you can say it in simple words.
But why do these people have to be so insulting?
I have the feeling that these people are only spending their time on writing negative about Hillary. That hurts me! 
But I’m trying to say myself that these people are just jealous…
Their President is not a President and he will never possess class and intelligence… I think they have a problem to accept that Hillary is the right president and that she shows how a president behaves in public.
It must be hard for these people when they see that Hillary taking
more care of the country than her great hero Trump…