i want to be born earlier

“He was my brother.”

Those were the first words to tumble out of her mouth when Rhaegar told her Brandon had been killed. He held her hands as if that were any sort of consolation, as if his touch would remind her that there were fairer things to live for. 

“I’m sorry, sweetling,” he cooed as if she were a confused child and not a woman who had just had her whole world pulled out from under her.

“I have to– I have to go to my family. This was a mistake. I must go home.” She rose to her feet quickly, her body moving at a faster pace than her mind, but two hands firmly returned her to her seat.

“I’m afraid that’s not possible, Lyanna,” Rhaegar informed her coldly, but with a kind smile. “It’s far too dangerous now– and you’re with child.”

“Please.” The word is tremulous and weak on her lips when she wanted to be bold and strong– but how, how could she be, when she was so far south and her pack so far away and reduced to only three?

Rhaegar pressed a kiss to her forehead in response. It burned worse than any other words he could have offered.




“He is my brother.”

She’s enraged. She’s tired, and aching, and in sorrow too, but most of all, she’s enraged.

“This is a war, Lyanna. I have no choice.” Rhaegar does not treat her like a child anymore, no, not after he learned that she had teeth and claws to match those the wolf on her sigil sported. Not after her belly swelled with true object of his desire.

“You have a choice! You have a choice not to raise your sword against him. You have the choice to spare him and let me see him again.” The words alone brought unbidden tears to her eyes. Oh, to see Ned again would be so sweet. Kind, gentle Ned with his honest face and boundless patience. She missed him. She missed him so much.

“I have a kingdom and a family to protect,” Rhaegar returned.

“So does he!”

“It is not the same.”

She would have scoffed had it not been her brother’s life on the line. “Then I pray the gods strike you down.”

Rhaegar smiled, however sad that smile was. Once upon a time she had swooned at that smile. Now, however, she prays he dies with it upon his lips.




“He is my brother.”

She gripped Arthur’s hand with as much strength as she could offer. Her fever was burning, burning, burning everything away. She should have died days earlier, but Lyanna knew she must live.

“I’m sorry, my lady,” Arthur said grimly, offering a half-hearted squeeze in return.

“I want to see him again. Please, I want to see Ned.” 

“He comes now.”

“Please, Ser Arthur.”

The knight retreated as the babe at her breast began to cry anew.





Had it not been for his touch, for the coldness of his skin against her hot, she would have thought him a dream, born of fever and her deepest desire.

“Lyanna,” his voice called to her from the haze, sharp and clear and beautiful. “Lyanna, it’s Ned.”

“Thank the gods,” she breathed. He grasped her hand, pressed it to his lips. His face swam in her vision, but it was Ned, it was really Ned. “I feared I’d never see you again.”

“I’m here, Lya.”

“Then listen.” She licked her chapped lips. “Please, listen.”

Her brother nodded, and listened.

Winchesters in Riverdale (Part Ten/Finale)

After a hunt gone wrong, Y/N Winchester, the 17 year old half-sister of Sam and Dean Winchester, her older brothers, and Castiel are transported to Riverdale, a town in a different universe. While Sam, Dean, and Castiel attempt to find a way back home, Y/N struggles to fit in in the community of Riverdale. In a universe with no monsters to worry about, there’s so many questions that need answering.

Can she ever try to be normal after hunting for all of her life? Who’s the good-looking, mystical teen with the beanie who’s always at that diner? And will anyone discover that secret she’s been hiding for the last year and a half?

Masterlist for the other parts of this story


There was comfortable silence between you and Jughead as the two of you walked hand in hand together down the street. Your feet were cold on the gravel, your heels forgotten and swinging from your free hand. You didn’t know where you were going but you didn’t care. The dance was forgotten about although you could still hear the faint music. You were with Jughead. That was the only thing that mattered. Every now and then you would sneak a peek at the raven-haired teen. You tried to memorize the way the moonlight bounced off him. The way he smiled at you when he thought you weren’t looking. Everything.

Suddenly, Jughead stopped and turned to look at you.

“Okay, close your eyes.” he said.

You rose your eyebrows at him and he rolled his eyes.

“Trust me.” he said, smiling.

You sighed but closed your eyes nonetheless.

“Making me the next Jason Blossom?” you joked.

Jughead snorted.

He began to lead you off the gravel road and soon enough your feet felt the hard ground turn to grass.

“Over here.” Jughead said.

Eventually he stopped.

“Can I open my eyes now?” you asked.

“Not yet. Take a seat first,”

You sighed again and sat down, putting your shoes next to you. You heard Jughead sit next to you and felt his warm palms on your shoulders.

“Okay,” he said quietly. “Open them,”

You opened your eyes.

As you looked around, you saw that the two of you were in the middle of the park, surrounded by swing sets and jungle gyms and money bars.

You looked up and your mouth dropped open.

The sky, which had previously been covered by trees as you walked in the street had opened up, revealing the beautiful night sky. The full moon shone brightly and there were millions upon million of stars to be seen.

“Not bad, huh?” Jughead asked as he removed his hands from your shoulders.

You looked at the beaming boy whose face was inches away from yours.

“It’s beautiful.” you said.

Jughead smiled shyly before he leaned in, kissing you softly. You smiled into the kiss as your arms wrapped around Jughead’s arm, your fingers running over the few black locks of hair resting on Jughead’s neck that had escaped from his beanie. He stopped kissing you when a sudden gust of wind hit your bare arms making you shiver. Jughead frowned as he looked at you.

“Are you cold?” he asked.

You shook your head.

“No, I’m fine,” you said. “It’s just—”

You were cut off when you saw Jughead quickly taking his jacket off, draping it over your shoulders.

You smiled as him as you pulled the warm fabric closer to you.

“Thank you.” you mumbled.

Jughead smirked and draped his arm around you. The two of you lied down and you snuggled into the younger teen’s warm chest, Jughead’s arm pulling you closer to him. The two of you looked up at the night sky, looking up at the sky.

You didn’t know how long you laid there for before Jughead spoke again.

“What’s her name?” Jughead asked suddenly.

Your eyes widened as you looked up at him. Jughead looked panicked.

“I, uh, I-I didn’t mean to say that out loud,” he rambled, convinced he had ruined everything. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said—”

To his surprise, you giggled, cutting him off.

You changed your position so you were facing him, your elbow supporting your head as you rested it on your fist. Jughead mimicked your position, watching you warily.

“It’s okay,” you said. “After what you said to me earlier, um, I feel like it’s easier to talk about. Still hard, yeah. But it’s easier,” you said.

Jughead nodded.

“Her name is Lily,” you said. “Her father… he used to get me flowers. Almost everyday. He’d go outside and pick a whole bunch of them for me. They were lilies. He, um, passed away before Lily was born and I guess I just wanted to find a way to connect her name to him. Even if she would never know who he was. Or who I am for that matter.”

Jughead’s eyes widened.

“I-I’m sorry,” he said again. “I didn’t know he died.”

You smiled softly at him.

“It’s okay,” you said quietly. “It’s… been a while. The ache never really goes away but I’m making my way. One day at a time.”

Jughead nodded again.

“Do your brothers—”

“No,” you said, shaking your head. “They don’t know about Lily. Castiel, you know, the one always wearing that trench coat; he knows. He helped me run away and kept me hidden unless Lily was born.”

Jughead’s eyes widened.

““Hidden?”” he repeated. “From what?”

You sighed.

“It doesn’t matter.”

“Yes, Y/N, it does,” Jughead said. “Are you in danger?”

You sighed, tried to figuring out a way to phrase your job.

Hey, Jughead, I kinda sorta kill monsters for a living, and I’ve occasionally fought the Devil himself. No big deal. Oh, and my dead boyfriend was killed by a rogue angel using my brother’s body as a vessel.

You shook your head again.

“No,” you said.

Not immediate danger.

“I told you how I had kind of a weird job, right?”

Jughead nodded.

“Well… sometimes that job’s dangerous,”

Sometimes? Try all the time.

“There are thi— people out there who want to hurt me,” you corrected yourself. “But it’s okay. It’s part of the job. Besides, my brothers have my back. So does Castiel.”


“Jughead, please don’t worry,” you nearly begged. “I’m okay, alright?”

Jughead looked like he wanted to say more. And he did. He wanted to beg you to tell him everything. To stay with him and Archie so they could protect you from whatever wanted to hurt you. But as he looked into your pleading eyes, he melted and couldn’t say anything else.

“Okay.” he said hoarsely.

You let out a sigh of relief once you realized Jughead wasn’t going to press you further. The two of you lied back down and you snuggled back into Jughead’s chest, closing your eyes. The silence returned but Jughead felt tense under you. Like he wanted to say something else.

“You’re leaving, aren’t you?” he suddenly asked softly.

You froze in his arms, eyes opening as you looked at his sad expression.

“I, uh, saw your brothers in Pop’s the other day. I, um, decided to eavesdrop a little bit. Thought I could maybe find out how you were doing. Instead I heard them talking about going home or something.” he said.

You swallowed the lump in your throat and nodded slowly.

“Yeah,” you said quietly. “We leave tomorrow.”

You heard Jughead give a defeated exhale.

“W-Will I ever see you again? I can still text you, right?” he asked weakly.

Tears welled up in your eyes as you slowly shook your head.

“I—Jughead, I wish. It won’t—It can’t—” you stopped before you began to cry.

You would never see Jughead again. He wouldn’t be able to contact you. Texting someone from a different universe? It was impossible.

“If you don’t want to see me—”

“No!” you exclaimed. “Jughead, I…”

You felt tears rolling down your face.

“I-I love you,” you said.

Jughead’s eyes widened at your confession.

“I love you,” you said again. “I never thought I could love someone the way I love you again. I don’t want to leave. But it’s my home. Everything I know is there. Family, friends, my life. And I can’t just leave it. I-I need you to understand that.”

Jughead was silent as he contemplated your words. and you got more and more nervous as the silence stretched on and on.

What if this was it? What if he just got up and left? What if he didn’t understand? What if he decided—

Jughead’s lips crashing against yours snapped you out of your thoughts. The freshly fallen tears on his cheeks mixed with yours and you could taste salt. You immediately kissed him back roughly, your teeth clacking together. But neither of you cared. When you pulled away for air, you were filled with relief when you saw Jughead smiling softly at you despite the tears in his eyes.

“I love you, too.” he said.

There were no more words to be spoken. He understood.

“Just… do me a favor, okay?” Jughead asked.

You nodded as you turned around to face the teen.

Jughead had walked you all the way back to the motel. He offered to get the car and drive you home but you declined. The more time you could spend with Jughead the better. You had walked hand in hand the entire way back. You talked about your favorite moments together, teasing each other with your little inside jokes, and had even stopped for a quick milkshake at Pop’s. One last time.

“Of course.”

Jughead sighed.

“Tell your brothers. About Lily,”

Your opened your mouth to protest but you were cut off by Jughead again.

“Please,” he said. “You’ll feel a lot better. And I know they’ll listen to you and help you out. I’ve seen the way they look at you. They look terrified. Like they think you’re gonna leave again without any warning. Y/N, I don’t think they’ll be able to handle that again.”

You let out a shaky sigh.


“Just talk to them. Please?” Jughead asked.

You nodded.

“Okay,” you said. “When we get home, I’ll talk to them.”

Jughead let out a sigh of relief.

“Thank you.” he whispered.

You gave a small smile to the teen.

“I, um,” you began, unsure of what to say. “I guess I’ll see you around, Mr. Jones.”

Jughead smirked as he took a step closer to you.

“I’ll see you around, Ms. Winchester.” he said softly.

He dipped down, capturing your lips in one last passionate kiss. You kissed back with just as much fervor, neither of you wanting this moment to end. When you finally pulled away, the two of you looked at each other sadly. Jughead began to back away, eyes never leaving yours.

“Goodbye.” he said softly.

Tears welled in your eyes again.

“Bye.” you said back, watching him as he turned around, beginning the walk back to the school.

You closed the door, back sliding down on it. You dropped your shoes next to you and looked at the clock.


You needed to get to bed. You had to be up bright and early tomorrow. Willing yourself not to cry again, you took a deep breath again and got under your covers, not caring you were still wearing your dress or makeup.

The next day. 12 pm.

Jughead Jones sat at his usual booth at Pop’s, staring at his computer. No matter how hard he tried to concentrate, he could seem to get any words out. He looked down at his phone, debating about what he should do. You were gone. He had tried to visit your motel room around noon only to find everything gone. There was no trace of you or the others. You had just… disappeared. It was like you were never there.

Eventually deciding he had nothing to lose, he typed a quick message to you before sending it out, taking a deep breath. 

A guy could try, right?

Across a million billion trillion universes, you settled into one of the chairs in the Bunker, smirking at Dean as he strutted around the main area.

“Ah, it’s good to be back!” Dean exclaimed as he took a swig of beer.

Sam chuckled while Castiel just looked at the eldest Winchester blankly.

After transporting back to your universe, the four of you were now back home after you finally killed the witch who transported you there. You wished that your brothers wouldn’t have to kill her but once you found out she was terrorizing the rest of the town and killing more and more people, you had to put a stop to it.

Your phone’s screen lighting up made you look down at it.

(1) New message from Mr. Jones

Your heartbeat quickened.

Could it be?

You reached for the phone before you stopped yourself. Despite the fact that you were dying to, you didn’t dare open the message. Not yet. Jughead’s words from the night before resonated in your head and you took a deep breath. You had something to do first.

“Hey, guys?” you asked.

The three men turned to you.

“I, um, I have something to tell you.”

Chuck smiled as he watched you and Jughead each in your respective universes.

“Father…” an angel beside him began. “Pardon me for questioning you, but why have you allowed contact via technology between the Winchester girl and Jones boy? They live in different universes. How will they ever see each other again?”

Chuck’s smile didn’t falter.

“They’ll find a way. It’s what Winchesters and Joneses do.”


A/N: That’s it! I hope you guys enjoyed it!! I originally was going to have a much more angsty ending, but I just couldn’t do it (and I love writing angst!)


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Winchesters in Riverdale Taglist

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Dear Theodosia

Pairing: Sam x Reader

Word Count: 1,729

Warnings: pregnancy (no labor described), angst, fighting (Sam and Dean), canon divergence to 8x03 “Heartache”, fluff

Summary: After discovering you’re pregnant, you and Sam leave the hunting life behind. The song used is Dear Theodosia from Hamilton.

“Dean, I’m not kidding this time!”

Sam’s voice is loud over the low rumble of the Impala’s engine. You’re feigning sleep in the backseat, your forehead pressed against the cold window. Sam and Dean have been arguing for the past ten minutes, and the tension is finally coming to a head.

Keep reading

I love you. See you later.

It was a simple recon mission and yet, the dangers still lurked in each corner. Hunk and Keith got paired up again, considering that they did and ace job in the last one with the Weblum.

The whole castle was at the hanger and Hunk was showered with hugs and encouragement while Shiro pulled Keith into a tight embrace. But this time was a little different because Lance joined in too. They have been paladins for a little more than a year now and after all that time, Lance had grown closer with his rival and that that bloomed into something lovelier; their bonds rooted on the beautiful mystery of love.

“Keith!” Lance threw his arms around Keith who was clad in his full paladin armor. “I’ll see you at dinner. I’m going to help Coran make it tonight so you better eat up!”

“Oh yeah?” Keith chuckled lowly. “Alright. Don’t overcook the beans like the last time.”

“My casserole was perfect, you ass!” Lance shoved him playfully but got straight to the point when he pressed a loving kiss on Keith’s lips. The whole hanger burst into wolf whistles except for Pidge who made gagging noises. Lance was sucked into those deep violet pools as Keith looked into his blue ones, a silent message passing between them;

‘I love you. See you later.’

And then, the yellow and red paladins were off along with the yellow lion of Voltron. Lance eagerly waved as they left from where he stood with the others in the hanger.

'I love you. See you later.’

But 4 vargas later, Hunk returned alone; broken and in tears. He fell to his knees in front of his best friend and the others while his hands clutched something tightly between them.

“I’m sorry.” Hunk wept. “I’m so sorry… I tried, but Keith…he… he…”

Lance was speechless and he felt his heart die a painful death when Hunk handed him Keith’s red helmet, the visor glass shattered. On the radio was a previous recording of Lance’s voice from another mission, repeating the same silent parting words they had earlier:

“I love you. See you later.”

Since I’m from the future, it’s already Feb 13 here. So, I made you guys this little pre-Valentine gift. I hope you like it. 

For my mom, @forsakenangel88 and my little sister @sir-schneeflocke and to my pain-loving friends: @shadowdarkleonidascrusade @deleriousfromcoffee @jackalopes-vld and to everyone else who like the senseless crap I write. 


I didn’t want to use a black person as an example because black don’t crack and it would be unfair, but this is an example of what happens when evil lives inside you.

Christie Brinkley and Steve Bannon are both 63. She was born nine months earlier than him. And he’s the one with the nerve to think his genes are superior to literally anyone’s.

l-batman-l  asked:

so since you're seventeen, would I right in assuming you just started year twelve? If so, good luck!! I just graduated in November and honestly, this year will be SUPER stressful but also super rewarding!! Are you going to post photos of you at formal, cause honestly I'm really excited to see you all dressed up <3

I have already graduated and gotten into the university that I want dear! The system is a little bit different down here in Australia. Since I was born in March I got to start school earlier, hence why I have already graduated and will be going to university this year ^.^

But here are my formal photos for those who care (I look nothing like myself because I’m a makeup-less person so ye)

The Last Padawan

For @dogmatix​ ‘s prompt, thanks for all of them, one went right into Haunted’s file, and this one sparkled this AU. 

« Do you know the Queen, Master ? You seem very familiar with the layout of the Palace. » asked young Obi-Wan Kenobi as he was trailing behind Qui-Gon Jinn.
« No, padawan, but I do know the Prince Consort. » answered the Jedi Master.

The young man tilted his head as he tried to remember the names from their briefing.

« Prince Anakin Naberrie ? » he tried, and smiled as his master nodded.
« Yes, though I knew him under the name of Skywalker. »

Obi-Wan stared. He knew that name.

« Wasn’t Anakin Skywalker… your first Padawan, Master ? »
« My second. » corrected Qui Gon. « Yes, he was. He left the Order for love, as you can guess, but we remained in contact. »

Obi-Wan remained silent after that, as they walked toward the court room, trying to appear as calm as possible.
Why did the Council sent them, if Qui-Gon knew one of the rulers personnaly ? It was a conflict of interest, as they were sent to ask Queen Amidala to come with them, to answer before the Senate for her actions.
For Naboo had just seceded from the Republic.

Things had gone quickly after that. Queen Amidala only felt that the Galactic Senate was too slow and too corrupted to be allowed to have any sort of power over her planet, and meant to leave peacefully, but other planets, other systems began to follow her lead, and soon, the Senate felt threatened by what was by now the Confederacy of Independent Systems.

No one knew if the assassination attempt on her, as she was on Coruscant to try to settle matters diplomatically, was mandated by the CIS or the Senate. But both governments were quick to blame the other…

Until the Geonosis’ debacle. And then war broke out.

Qui-Gon did not feel that a Padawan’s place was in the front lines. He feared for Obi-Wan’s well-being.
He knew how to lead men, yes, but he did so with a very hands-on approach, always in the thick of battle, despite Qui-Gon and Cody’s best efforts.
He was not acting as a Commander, but as if he was one of them. At fifteen, he was in the exact middle between the clones’ physical and actual ages, and fit right in.
Once more, Obi-Wan struggles with attachment pushed him to involve himself far too much. Already, Qui-Gon could hear some clones speak with him in Mandalorian, joke with him, call him vod as he was calling them brothers.

As each clone’s death was hitting his Padawan harder and harder, Qui-Gon prayed for the war to end soon.

When Order 66 came, Qui-Gon, Obi-Wan and the 212th were on Utapau.
Qui-Gon was turning towards Cody, brow furrowed, and understood too late that the rifle raised was aimed at him.
He heard Obi-Wan’s cry of denial before the darkness claimed him as he passed into the Force.

It took all of Cody’s willpower to convince himself and the voice screaming at him that GOOD SOLDIERS FOLLOW ORDERS that the young man craddling the General Traitor’s body was one of his vods, and not a Jedi, not a Padawan. A vod, just with a more different face than the others, but he had bled with them, eaten with them, slept with them, stood in Rememberance with them.

He was a vod and not concerned by the Order.

He knew he was right for not a single one of the clones fired at him either.

During the following year, Obi-Wan nearly Fell several times.
When he understood why his brothers had killed his Master.
When he felt hundreds, thousands of Jedi pass into the Force like Qui-Gon had.
When he saw kind, considerate, loving Prince Anakin, whom he had considered a friend, stand behind Emperor Palpatine as Darth Vader.
A Sith.

He nearly Fell as he was trying to save as much clones as he could, and did not succeed nearly as much as he wanted.
He nearly Fell when he screamed his anguish and betrayal at Vader.

But every time the Dark Side threatened to overpower him, he would seek the company of one of his brothers, and breathe, and remember.
He could become a Sith, and fall on the Empire like a vengeful general, followed by thousands of angry clones.
But in doing so, he would betray each and every one of them.
And he would betray his Master’s legacy.

« I will find another way. One that allows me to remain a Jedi. » Obi-Wan whispered at Tatooine’s starry sky.

He snorted.

Before Qui-Gon took him on, he had believed that he had failed, that he would never be a Padawan.
Now, without his Master to Knight him, without any Jedi left, it seemed that he would always be one.

clydeandjanie  asked:

If Hyde had been in character since the begining of the show, his season 2-3 self would had a crush on Donna and treat Jackie that bad?

Yes and yes, lol. Now, let me explain:

- The Crush:

I hate it a lot, but I know it would happen anyway. The difference is that he won’t act like such a creep over her. He would back off the second she said no and would not act over it again after seeing Eric and Donna are going for each other, and only each other.

So inted of forcing her into a kiss and stalking her, being agressive towards her and imposing his feelings, he would just, maybe, pine after her at the distance, maybe banter about it with Fez some time, and that’s it.

He would get over it, especially after seeing Donna so happy with Eric. He would probably had the chance to talk it out with her, because of course Donna would care about his feelings, she just doesn’t feel the same way. And she doesn’t want to lose her friend, alright.

After The Talk™, things will eventually get normal again.

- Being an ass to Jackie:

What made Hyde stop being an idiot to Jackie was realizing she is a human being, like him and his friends, who has her own problems and feelings, and who had been hurt by the guy he was so jealous for because she took all his attention away.

Yeah, I said that.

Keep reading


Ok so I got a theory… I watch Greys Anatomy, The Walking Dead, and Supernatural. I think in Greys anatomy when he died in the hospital a reaper came to take him away but he was so in love with Izzy that he wanted to live and he somehow made a deal with a reaper. And the reaper said that he could have another life but its going to be in an earlier time. And he asked if he would still be able to see Izzy and the reaper said that its possible. So the reaper gave him another life and he was born again as John Winchester. Well when John became older he remembered his previous life and wanted to find Izzy but decided that he didn’t want to anymore and its best to just leave it. So later when John made that deal and died for Dean a reaper made another deal with John because John wanted to live a good like with his boys. But the reaper warned him that this life would be very hard but he thought he could get through it. Well he ended up being born again as Negan, and when the memory of his previous life came to him he was about to go search for his boys but the apocalypse happened and he became evil and didn’t give a crap about Sam and Dean anymore. Then killed people and named a bat Lucille That’s my theory … Wow that’s so screwed up😆😂😂

Originally posted by yourreactiongifs

One day, after Lisa Marie was born, I was looking at some earlier photographs of myself and I felt I didn’t look real in them. The black hair, the heavy eyeliner, the double pairs of eyelashes, they were the style at the time, but now I like the idea of a more natural look. Inside, I was becoming my own person. I wanted to be more me. I decided to try a softer look. First, I lightened my hair. Then I got rid of the false eyelashes and lightened my eye makeup from black to more subtle browns.
—  Priscilla Presley interview with Redbook magazine, 1987. How did you arrive of your present natural look, so different from the one you were as Mrs. Elvis Presley?
THEORY: What is Elias Ainsworth?

I don’t know has anyone come up with this theory yet (i don’t read theories for this series because spoilers) but I wanna bring it up;

Many in this fandom have assumed our beloved Elias might be a perfect/succeed chimera. There has even been some “evidence” between lines that this could be the case, it could even work very well with the plot in my opinion.

BUT(T), I was reading some Native American mythologies and came across a very known beast you might have heard of; Wendigo.

What is Wendigo? It is a monster, usually pictured to have a face of an elk/reindeer. They are pretty much immortal and were born from humans when a person submitted to cannibalism.

A picture of Wendigo:

Looking familiar?

Back to our dear Elias;

- The first memories he got is that HE ATE HUMANS. He still has this lust, since he kinda wanted to eat his waifu and a jerky brad earlier.

- He has been around a very long time and doesn’t seem to age.

- If he was a human earlier (maybe even a wizard) it would explain how he kinda has human emotions and he understands what they mean even thought “he can’t feel/understand them”. 

i.e he shows a lot of affection towards Chise, he confessed he felt annoyed and frustrated about people asking him to have apprentice, he can feel anger and even get lonely and be afraid (< when chise mentioned Elias’ lust for flesh or when chise saw his “true” form).

Magic might also go with this but since there’s creatures that can do magic I wouldn’t make it as a main point, although he doesn’t need others to boost his magic and his powers are very VERY impressive.

- He obviously isn’t even near a human, at least not anymore, but his anatomy is somewhat similar. 

- His other forms do fit with chimera description but also as an Wendigo; reindeer/ox looking head, skeleton/skinny body and some fur/hair. Wings and tail can be explained as the fact Wendigos are considered as demons… or that he is a wizard and can change his appearance.

- Many also fear Elias and tell Chise not to trust him. They also say he’s a monster who tries to play human or “a good, loving husband”.

Don’t get me wrong, I support both theories Elias being a chimera or a wendigo. As I said, being a chimera would be more lore-wise since they have been mentioned couple of times, like as hints. I just happened to be reading of these creatures and simply couldn’t not see the similarities! There might even be more but I was too lazy to bring everything up.

I hope it’s not confirmed Elias is a chimera, otherwise this is awkward, the fox chapter is the last one I’ve read!

EDIT: also, forgot one more detail; Wendigos are known to live in cooler areas, like mines/caves and snowy forests/mountains and they hunt mostly at night. And where did Lindel meet Elias? One winter night, in the middle of snowy tundra.

John Laurens and Francis Kinloch

This post is a compilation of the information I have gathered about the Laurens-Kinloch relationship, their subsequent “breakup,” and their post-breakup interactions.  This was honestly one of my favorite posts to research and write.  It’s a long one, but I promise you that it’s worth your time (there are some quotes that rival that Hamilton-Laurens correspondence in terms of affection).  Some of the quotes I have in this post are from transcripts sent to me by Massey and are generally not publicly accessible.  If anyone wants me to post the whole transcripts of the letters, just let me know, and I’d be happy to oblige.

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My Girl II

Part I

Pairing: Young!James Potter x Reader

Note: This is really late but I want to wish everyone a Happy New Year!  So some of you wanted a continuation to My Girl and I know it took forever but here it is! I’ve been rewriting this a million times, and I’m actually satisfied with this one, so I hope you guys like it!  

Oh and I just hit 139 followers, thank you all so much for your support!  Really, it makes me want to write more! <3

Other  stories: Beautiful | Ask You Out I II III IV

Disclaimer: I don’t own anything from the Potterverse!


The smell of books, parchment, and ink filled your lungs as you flipped through the pages of The Standard Book of Spells. You were, as you named it, merely light-reading. Refreshing your memory with the list of spells and their functions, trying to forget the events that transpired earlier.

James was a total git.

You nodded to yourself in confirmation. That’s right. He was a git and you were never going to talk to him again unless he apologized. You didn’t mind his jokes, even the jokes he made about you, but the one he made earlier was just pushing his luck.

It’s not that the thought of you and James dating was totally out of the question. Because you have thought about it before, during the late hours of the night when you laid awake in your bed staring up at the canopy ceiling of your four-poster bed. Also, you may have had a childhood crush on him but everything is different now. James is different, you’re different. So any thought about that topic after that night was swiftly eradicated.

Besides, you let out a small sigh, he had Lily right?

You and Lily were friends. The redheaded girl always had your back whenever James and Sirius tried to bully persuade you to make their homework for them, and she was always ready to listen to whatever you had to say. Lily was the sweetest person you knew and anyone would be lucky to have her.

Your train of thought broke when you heard the chair in front of you get dragged out from under the table. You looked up to see Remus flash you a sheepish smile and sit down, gingerly placing his book on the table. “Sirius wants you to go back to the common room.” He informed you quietly and opened his book to start reading.

You rolled your e/c eyes. “So you’re here to pick me up?”

Remus shrugged. “Not if you want to stay here. Then I’ll be happy to accompany you.” He flashed you one of his rare grins and you laughed, making Madam Pince clear her throat. You shot her an apologetic glance before turning back to your friend.

“You’re the best Rem, if Sirius wants me to go back, he should’ve come pick me up himself.”

“He can’t. He and James are banned from entering the library for the rest of the year, remember?”

Your mouth formed a perfect ‘o’ as you just remembered that fact. The duo nearly set the entire library on fire while they were studying for their exam on charms. Sirius gave up on studying five minutes into it and he coaxed James out of it as well and they tried practicing their little spells. You hummed thoughtfully and looked at Remus who had his eyes fixed on the pages of his book.

“You’re staring.” He stated beneath his breath and you smiled at him.

“I was just thinking.”

Remus snorted in amusement. “A Knut for your thoughts?”

You rolled your eyes at him playfully. “Make it a Galleon and we’ll see.” You drummed your fingers on the wooden surface of the table softly, “I’m not going back to the common room with you any time soon, Remus.” You informed him. “I don’t want to have to deal with whatever happened earlier yet.”

Remus nodded in understanding, he knew your mind was still in a gutter. He was pretty surprised with James’ proposal earlier as well. Wasn’t it always Lily? Did he miss something? He racked his brain for clues, even subtle ones. He knew you sort of fancied James in a way, and if the circumstances were different, he would’ve loved to support you and tell you not to hold back, but with the other person in question clearly not showing any interest in reciprocation and only showing affection to the muggle-born, redheaded girl; he kept his mouth shut. Like he always did… and it made him feel terrible.

Hours later, it was nearly dinner time and Remus had gone off to the Great Hall. You actually had to force him to go since he didn’t want to leave you behind. He promised to come back with some grub for you, because even if he denied it, he was starving. Madam Pince left to eat her supper as well leaving you alone in the large, candlelit library. You had long removed your robe and draped it over the chair next to you.

You tied your hair up into a bun and rolled up your sleeves.


Your eyes roamed the deserted library, “Psst.” Came the whisper again and you took out your wand and got up of your seat. “Who’s there?” You questioned. You hoped it was anyone but a Slytherin or Peeves. Someone then hugged you tightly from behind making you yelp in surprise.

You turned and that someone took off a cloak, revealing the messy haired, glasses wearing idiot you called a friend. You frowned. Well you’d rather deal with a Slytherin of Peeves now instead of James Potter. You pushed him away and sat back down, huffing in irritation.

James cleared his throat and sat opposite of you, where Remus previously sat. “Hey, I brought you something to eat. You must be starving.” He quietly said and placed some sandwiches and treacle tarts on the table in front of you.

“Remus was going to bring me food.”

“Remus is not coming back here for a while.” He sounded a little cheerful at the proclamation which annoyed you more.

You sighed in realization. Oh of course. Remus may be your friend, but he was James’ friend too. You should’ve seen this coming. “James I’m not continuing this conversation until you apologize.”

“I’m not apologizing.” He deadpanned.

Your eyes flickered to him in anger. “Typical! You never really do apologize, even when you play pranks on me or got me into trouble!”

“Y/N, listen to me-”

“No, James. You listen. I’m tired alright? You can’t just boss me around like you do with Peter or Remus or sometimes even Sirius. I’m not your girl, I’m not your property. And… and…” You were nearly hyperventilating now, your emotions seemingly getting the better of you. “And you can’t just ask me out on a whim thinking I’ll accept when you obviously like another girl! I am not going to be some fling!” You cry out and buried your face in your hands in frustration. Oh Merlin… this was not what you had in mind.

Silence stretched making you think that maybe he left. Leaving you like an ugly mess until you felt his cold hands peeling yours away from your face. “Y/N, I’m sorry.”

You faced him uncertainly and your eyes caught his. “I’m sorry I wasn’t really thinking about how you felt. I know a can be a…”

“A bastard.” You supplied.

“Alright, a bastard sometimes.”

All the time you mentally thought.

“But I just wanted you to know that I really do like you very much.” He finished, his eyes still on you, his gaze never faltering.

You looked away first. “Please James, you honestly think I could believe you? Not once have you shown the slightest interest in me. It was always Evans this, Evans that. Now you’re suddenly Y/N, Y/N, Y/N?”

“You’re my girl, Y/N. Evans was a way to hide my feelings for you since Sirius caught me staring at you one time when you and her were talking. I became flustered and blurted out that I was looking at Lily instead and the lie stuck until now.” His hands still held yours and you could feel his slowly warming up and you just noticed that he was blushing. Actually blushing, and that made you blush too. You had never held hands with James before and it felt nice and it made you long to hold his hand any time you wanted to.  

“I fell in love with the girl who injured my foot on the first train ride to Hogwarts, and I fell hard.” He sincerely said, “As cliché as it sounds, it’s true. I hope you believe me.”

You bit your lower lip. You wanted to believe him, you really did. But this was all too good to be true. You removed your hands from his and hugged yourself. James looked crestfallen. “I think I’ll need to sleep on it.” You mumbled and lowered your gaze. You couldn’t face him after he looked so devastated. You could hear him stand up from his seat but still you didn’t look at him.

“It’s all right, I’ll wait for you.” He told you and threw his Invisibility Cloak on. You could hear his footsteps softly walk away but before he reached the door you called out to him.


“Yes?” You heard him reply from afar.

“No more lies, please?” You tried to keep your voice level but it shook fervently.

“No more lies.” He agreed and you could feel him crack into a grin as he left the library shutting the doors with a soft thud.

Dedicated trainees or not

I was an SM trainee for a period of time. It was when I was in middle school. They offered Chinese classes at my school and I was taking them. I had been taking them since sixth grade.

It was the summer between seventh and eighth grade. In two months, I would be in eight grade. My parents and two of my friends parents got together and decided to go to China.

My friend, Maddy, was half Chinese and half Caucasian. They wanted her to go connect back to her roots. It was Mia, Maddy, and I, along with our parents going to China.

I was twelve then, Mia and Maddy were thirteen. I was born in December while they were born in the earlier months. I think it was 2009 back then.

We went to China and it was great. It was fun. I loved the culture. Maddy could barely speak Chinese because her father barely spoke it around the house. I wasn’t Chinese. I was Vietnamese. Mia was from Kazakhstan.

I know, that’s not really a place where SM picks its trainees. But she had very nice features. She was tall already. 5'6". Taller than me, who was 5'4". Maddy was only 5'1". Mia also had brown hair and light brown eyes. I’ll have to admit, she was good looking and Kpop companies like the good looking ones.

We were in China, hanging out in a shop. Our parents were also with us. An SM scout was walking around the streets looking for new recruits. He spotted us in the shop and went in. He gave us his card and told us about the audition.

Our parents let us go to the audition. What’s the worse that can happen?

Mia was good at singing. She got all the solos when we were in school choir. She had chestnut brown hair. Light brown eyes. Tall. Good looking. SM let her in despite her heritage.

Maddy was good at singing too. Not as good as Mia, but still good. She was half Caucasian which gave her lighter features. Chocolate brown hair and light brown eyes. But SM was hesitant about her tan skin. She was just born tan.

But they let her in. She showed promise. Kai from Exo was tan too. She had full lips like him and a nice face.

I was more of a dancer and rapper. I could sing okay but I’d rather rap and dance. SM let me in. I spoke fluent English, Vietnamese, and was pretty good at Chinese. They believed that I could pick Korean up pretty easily. I also had very pale skin. SM liked that.

So then started out trainee years.

Mia was bullied. Despite her looks and singing talents, she was still bullied. There was never a trainee from Kazakhstan before. The Korean trainees bullied her for not being able to speak Korean.

Maddy wasn’t bullied. She spoke a little Chinese. She was Chinese. The Korean trainees didn’t bother her much.

They bothered me. They bullied me like they did with the other Viet trainees. They even did it with the Thai trainees. SM had never debuted a Viet or Thai trainee before. They liked to rub it in our faces.

Training was intense. We were rated on a scale of 1 to 6. 1 being terrible and 6 being expert.

Mia: Singing- 3 Dancing- 2 Rapping- 1 English- 6 Korean- 1

Maddy: Singing- 2 Dancing- 2 Rapping- 1 English- 6 Chinese- 2 Korean- 1

Me: Singing- 1 Dancing- 3 Rapping- 3 English- 6 Vietnamese- 6 Chinese- 3 Korean- 1

We trained for three years until there was a rumor that went around about a new boy band called Exo. The Korean bullies were excited because they thought it could’ve been them.

The look on Mia’s face was priceless when tears started to well up in their eyes when the twelve members were announced.

Honestly, some of us were jealous. Tao and Baekhyun only trained for a year until they debuted. It wasn’t fair to the others who had trained much longer.

Baekhyun was good at singing and he was hard working. He practiced his dancing as often as he could. I could understand why he was chosen, but why not one of the more experienced trainees?

Tao begged the manager to let him train for a few more years since he hadn’t grasped the Korean language yet. The manager ignored his pleas.

Whe clearly weren’t going to debut anytime soon and we needed to go to college so Mia, Maddy, and I left SM once out contracts for seven years ended. I was 19 and Mia and Maddy were 20.

That was seven years of our lives wasted. On intense training. Unhealthy diets.

Our scores were exceptional in the beginning of 2016. And they still didn’t let us debut.

Mia: Singing- 6 Dancing- 5 Rapping- 3 (she wasn’t a rapper) English- 6 Chinese- 4 Korean- 6

Maddy: Singing- 5 Dancing- 5 Rapping- 2 (she was to debut as a singer/dancer) English- 6 Chinese- 6 Korean- 6

Me: Singing- 3 Dancing- 6 Rapping- 5 English- 6 Chinese- 6 Korean 6 Vietnamese- 6

We were good at dancing. Good singers. A good rapper. And multiple languages that we could speak. And we still didn’t debut.

Old ex-trainees say that only the most dedicated trainees debut. That’s not true.

Tao begged for more time being a trainee. But it wasn’t up to him. Whether or not the trainee debuts is up to SM.

Mia, Maddy, and I dedicated seven years to being trainees. Mia got sick and hurt her throat after singing too much. Maddy got bone problems from SM wanting her to learn how to play piano and guitar. She practiced too often and her bones began to get problems.

I practiced dancing so much that I fell to my knees. During practice, I got a nosebleed. Now I have health issues.

The most dedicated trainees don’t always get to debut. It’s only up to SM.

anonymous asked:

How do you think Peridot would decide to have a child? How did the cgs react? Did any of them try to convince her not to?

1. This AU diverges from canon after the events of Gem Harvest. Peridot’s interactions with Andy and Greg make her more curious about what humans are like, so she begins to do in-depth research on them. She finds herself being particularly fascinated by children, for a lot of the same reasons Rose was. She began to wonder about how humans made them and if gem reproduction was possible. She met Laura, that lovely lady who I posted drawings of earlier today, and the two of them hit it off pretty quickly. After a while of being in a relationship with Laura, and learning about Rose Quartz and how Steven was born, Peridot decided she wanted to have a kid.
2. All of them were initially very surprised, Pearl especially. After the surprise died down, the reactions of each of the CGs (+Lapis) were a mixed bag. Steven was happy at first because he would finally meet someone that’s half human and half gem, just like him. But then when he realized that he wouldn’t see Peridot again after Janet was born, he was sad. Pearl was understandably less torn up about it than she was with Rose, as Peridot was just a mere friend of hers. But she was still upset. Garnet was sadder about losing Peridot than one would’ve thought, but she didn’t let her mood affect how she interacted with Peridot before Janet was born. She supported Peridot all the way. Amethyst was actually angry at Peridot for having Jan, and was the only gem who actually tried to persuade her not to do it. Lapis’ feelings were the same as Garnet’s, but she was also just generally confused about Peridot’s decision, because she saw a lot less value in humans than a lot of the other gems did at the time.
3. As I said in 2, Amethyst. She was rather bitter about the whole ordeal, but as Janet grew up, Amethyst tried not to let her feelings about what happened to Peridot affect how she treated her. She knew it wasn’t the kid’s fault, and it would be stupid as hell to hate her just for being born.

This might’ve turned out a little lengthy, but I wanted to answer your questions as best as I could!


Warnings: swearing, child abandonment

You had been more than excited as you had learned, that your sister had come down to Earth. The prospect, that she would be with you, had made living on Earth a whole lot better, given the fact, that you had barely had the chance to see her while still on the Ark.
Apparently your mother had hid you around two years underneath her clothes, in some kind of drawer – the clothes muffling your crying – until you became too big for it, and she just left you somewhere, all by yourself. Years had passed, until you learned who your mother had been, and she had immediately been floated.
Yet, sometimes, after all this had happened, Raven would pass by to visit you.
She told you what was going on outside, and that she hoped you’d get out once you’re eighteen – even though both of you knew you wouldn’t – but the older you got, the fewer she visited. You assumed that it must have been hard for her as well, seeing the sister she barely knew imprisoned, and guilty of her mother’s death.

But as you finally realised that Raven hadn’t come all the way down for you, but for her boyfriend, you had been more than devastated.

Okay, you never had much to do with each other, considering that you had been imprisoned almost right after you could walk. But still, the fact that she seemed to care about Finn more than about her own sister, hurt you. 

So, one day, when you watched her screw something together, you couldn’t stop yourself, but to direct the conversation to said topic.
You had never been good at shutting your mouth.

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Wait for You

Two weeks. Fourteen longs days I’ve been stuck in this gods damned townhouse. Stuck with Rhysand and his overbearing High Lord self. Stuck with Mor who won’t leave Azriel’s side. Stuck in this body that isn’t mine, stuck in this life I don’t seen an end to. I look at my sister and I see her adjusting, she doesn’t even seem upset that Feyre is gone. She hides her pointed ears, she smiles and laughs when Mor explains her new life to her.

She’s adjusting and learning. While i’m just stuck.

It’s dark, well past midnight when I find my way to the kitchen. I grab a glass and pour myself some water, my eyes darting to the door we were all told to avoid. The door that hides the pain of that day we’re all trying to desperately to move on from. The day my sister was taken, the day my life was changed. The door that leads to the one man who tried to save us all and lost a part of himself in the process.

Cassian. He’s stuck just like me. Stuck behind that door, in bed, his wings shredded. Stuck in a new life, one that won’t offer him the sky as his playground anymore.

Even my cold heart hurts for him.

I take in a deep breath, my feet moving before my mind catches up. I walk towards the door and grab the knob. I open it without a second thought, I go to the man who swore to protect me. The man who laid in a mess of his own blood and reached for me, because I was crying out while the Cauldron took me under.

His room is dark. It takes my eyes a moment to adjust to the moon shining in through the window. I set my glass down on the desk to my left, then walk towards his bed. There’s a chair there, one I’m sure Mor or Rhys has been sitting in, keeping him company. No one has given Cassian space since the healers told him they weren’t sure what would happen to his wings. No one wants to leave him alone to his own mind, to let him grieve the loss of everything he’s ever known.

I let out a slow breath, trying not to wake him. He looks so young, so unlike the cocky Illyrian I had come to know. He looks like the young man I never got to meet, the bastard born child who was left to die in the woods. I bite my bottom lip, afraid I’ll cry out in pain for him. A shiver runs down my spine, something pulls me towards the bed.

I reached out, my hand fluttering in front of me. I stop myself, but then I fight the shields I’m always wearing. I run my fingers lightly over his forearm, watching the steady rise and fall of his chest. He’s alive, he’s breathing. He’s here and he might not be whole anymore, but he’s still Cassian. His skin is warm under my fingers.

I take his hand in mine, thinking of the short time I have known him. I don’t deserve his loyalty, I don’t deserve him promising to protect me. From the very first meeting I hated him, I did everything I could to push him away. But he did everything to pull me closer, to promise me that Elain and I would always be safe with him. He did nothing but look at me, and swear on his life to protect me. All because I was his High Lady’s older sister.

All because he was more than a bastard born nobody.

A tear slips down my cheek as I realize how cruel I’ve been. He didn’t deserve any of the words or pain I’ve thrown at him. I struggle in another breath and close my eyes.

“Don’t cry, love,” his voice is soft as I open my eyes, “I know the view is beautiful from where you are.”

He’s staring at me with those beautiful brown eyes, the moonlight reflecting off of them. That cocky grin spreads across his face slowly. My heart twitches, he hasn’t smiled in days Rhys told Mor earlier. I want to reach out and push his hair out of his face. I want to press my lips to his, I want to melt into him and promise him everything I never knew I had inside my little body.

But something stops me, as it always does. Something screams at me to stop letting my weak heart control my body.

I start to pull away, but his big hand closes around mine. He laces our fingers together, “I didn’t mean to wake you up,” I whispered softly, “I just. I felt the need to check on you.”

He winces as he moves, his wings catching on the mattress beneath him. He runs his thumb slowly across the back of my hand, “I’m okay. I’ll be okay,” he whispered trying to soothe me, “as long as you’re safe, here with us. I’ll be okay.”

My guard is gone, the walls I have spent so many years building shatter around me as this man looks up at me from his bed, “I keep telling myself the dreams aren’t real, that you’re alive here with me. But I can’t stop seeing you there, on the floor. I can’t stop hearing you cry out while the healers look at your wings.”

Cassian pulls himself up into a sitting position. He lets go of my hand to frame my face. His eyes are dark and endless, “I am here and I won’t ever let them hurt you again.”

I nod slowly, leaning my forehead against his, “it’s not just them I’m afraid of,” I whisper as I feel the tingling in my stomach. I have known, ever since I arrived at this house, I’ve known why I’m drawn to this man. It’s the same reason why Rhysand agreed to let us live here while his mate is being held in the Spring Court.

Cassian takes in a deep breath and his thumb runs across the bags under my eyes. Neither of us have been getting much sleep in the last few weeks, “what is it you’re afraid of love?”

I close my eyes, I can’t look at him as I finally say the words out loud. I have been fighting myself, afraid of letting myself feel anything for anyone in this new body. I’m not ready to accept who I am, what I am. But I knew the moment it all happened, something had changed. The moment Cassian was here and well enough to sit on his own, I knew why Feyre risked everything to save this family she had found.

“You,” I finally answer him.

There is a beat of silence, Cassian’s hands still against my cheeks. When he doesn’t say anything, when his breathing becomes softer, I open my eyes and look at him. My heart is pounding in my ears, I am more than sure he can hear it too. I can smell the fear mixing with the sandalwood of him. I can see his mind working to understand what I am saying. He never did anything to make me fear him, he doesn’t know what to say.

“Nesta,” his voice catches. I can hear the longing, I can hear the confusion and the pain at my confession.

I finally reach up and brush a strand of dark hair out of his face. Ever since he had been put in this bed he refuses to let anyone near him to do any sort of grooming. He is barely allowing himself to live. He doesn’t want to survive without his wings. He doesn’t know who he is without them.

“I’m afraid of myself,” I whisper, the tears suddenly filling my eyes, “for the way you make me feel.”

His breath catches in his throat as he looks at me. I stand up off the chair, climbing onto the edge of the bed. Cassian moves to give me more space, but I shake my head. I keep his hand trapped in mine, pulling it up and placing it over my heart.

“Nesta,” he says my name like a prayer. Like it is an answer to a question he has been asking for a million years, “I am broken and half the man who promised to protect you. But my heart, it’s yours. It’s been yours ever since that very first time we met.”

I can’t help but smile as he reaches up and wipes away a tear. I hold his gaze, feeling the bond that I had been fighting slowly slip into place. I stop fighting, I stop fearing everything this man and his family have to offer. I stop fearing myself and feel life align back into place around me. I take in a deep breath, smiling as I watch Cassian feel it happen too.

“You’re my mate,” I whisper softly, his eyes wide as the shiver rolls down my spine. I feel his love, I feel his pain and his fear all at once. I feel everything as he holds me in his arms. My walls are gone, they will never be rebuilt now, not when this man is so gentle, is so loving as he looks at me, “and you scare the hell of out me.”

Cassian leans in before I can stop him. He presses his lips to mine, silencing the words that will no doubt ruin this moment for us. He kisses me slowly, his hands never leaving my face. My tiny fingers wrapp around his wrist, my body craving to feel his pressed against it. My heart speeds up as I realize what this means, as I realize how important this moment is. I am giving him everything I have left. My still hardened heart is now in the palm of his hands.

I pull away first, breathing in his scent, letting it fill my body. My mate.

Cassian has tears in his eyes as he opens them and looks at me, “my mate,” he whispers softly, breathing in my scent as I had just done with his, “so beautiful.”

I can’t help but smile as I wrap my arms around his neck, mindful of his broken wings. I press my lips against his shoulder, the warmth seeping into my body just as he pulls me tighter against his chest. I close my eyes, wondering if I would ever get used to this life. Maybe I could if this is the man I wake up beside everyday. Broken or not he is mine.

Together we will find a way to heal each other.

“Sleep love,” his deep voice whispers in my ear, “we can celebrate in the morning.”

I curl into his side, laying my head against his chest. I feel him kiss the top of my head, then his lips graze my forehead. I can feel the emotions pouring out of him. I can’t help but smile because his pain, for the moment, is completely gone. All I feel is happiness, so much happiness and love wraps around me. Because Cassian never believed he would find someone to love. He never thought he deserved a mate.

I close my eyes and drift off to sleep knowing I wouldn’t be woken by a nightmare. Because I was wrapped safely in my mate’s arms.


The bed is colder when I wake up. My pillow is gone, replaced by a blanket wrapped around me. I open my eyes, Cassian’s side is empty. My stomach falls, his scent still lingers, but his body heat disappeared long ago. I take in a breath, wondering if last night had been too much for him. I let down my walls, I let him into my heart. If anyone was to be afraid of this bond, it was me.

“Good morning,” his deep voice is brighter than it had been in weeks. He is up and carrying a tray with him as he closes the bedroom door. He is smiling as he sits back down beside me. My heart pulls as Rhys words filled my ears again; he hasn’t smiled in days.

I lean into his side as I look at the food he has brought us, “for a second there I thought you were reconsidering being stuck with me,” I whisper as I wrap my arms around his muscles.

He laughs and it vibrates through his chest, “with your fire? Never.”

His eyes meet mine after a moment of silence, “Nesta. I have to be honest,” he blows out a breath and his nostrils flare, “there’s this tradition. Once the bond had been put into place and you’re ready to accept it, the female usually offers the male food. I uh, I know how you are in the kitchen.”

I roll my eyes, “okay so I put the plastic container in the oven and it almost caught on fire. Are we ever going to let that go?”

HIs laugh is the most beautiful sound in the world, “not in this lifetime love,” he presses another kiss to my brow, “so I did the honors and cooked us breakfast. But I just,” he is nervous. His words are jumbled and I realize he isn’t concerned about his wings anymore, “I want to make sure this is what you want. That you want me, and that you want this bond. Because I will not force you into anything, I won’t force you to be with me. You are your own person, you always have been. Don’t think because —”

I cut off his rambling, pressing my lips to his. I can feel the tense in his shoulders ease as he wraps his arms around my waist. If the tray of food hadn’t been in front of us I would’ve thrown my leg over his lap and clung tightly to his neck. But instead I pull away, shaking my head as another smile appears on my face.

“This is what I want Cass,” I whisper as his eyes find mine, “you are what I want.”

His crooked smile sends my heart into overdrive as we settled back together and he watches me pick my fork up. I raise my eyebrows at him as I slowly pick up a few eggs and then bring them to my lips. He watches the entire time, his eyes never leaving me as I eat the entire breakfast on my own. My stomach tightens when I feel the pulse between us.

“Cassian,” I whisper his name just as he grabs the empty tray and sets it on the floor.

I kick the blankets out, grabbing for him the same time he grabs for me. Careful to avoid his wings I throw my leg over his lap, straddling him the way I had been imagining just moments before. HIs lips find mine, both of us moaning as our bodies came together. I melt into his arms, I melt into him. It is like we were two halves a whole, two pieces of a puzzle searching for the other our entire lives.

“Nesta,” his whispers my name as his lips pull from mine. He leaves a trail of hot kisses against my neck, my own moans fill the room. I can feel the marks he leaves with his teeth, my hips grounding into his. The bond throbs as he holds me tightly in his arms, my arms shaking, wishing to pull the clothes that separate us off.

My eyes close, the world around us seems to disappear. I lost and found myself in the Illyrian holding me in his arms. I bury my face in the crook of his neck as his hands slide down towards my pants. Before he can hook his fingers around the band and pull them down, a loud cough sounds from the doorway.

We are both so caught up in each other it takes whoever it is three more times to get our attention. My cheeks turn bright red as I pull away from Cassian and turn to see Rhysand and Mor both standing there staring at us. Cassian doesn’t let me leave his lap, instead he wraps his arms around me and glares at his family.

“I’m sorry to interrupt,” Rhysand’s voice is velvet and smooth. Cassian holds onto me tighter as his brother looks at us. I can feel his need to protect me shoot through our bond, “but I have some things I need to discuss with Cassian.”

Mor is smiling at the two of us, her eyes bright. I can see she is happy for us, happy her friend has found someone as hurt and broken, as closed off and afraid of this world as he is. I take in a deep breath, my eyes going back towards my mate’s. He won’t let me go, he growls at Rhys as he walks into the room, coming closer to me. I put my hand against his cheek, trying to tell him it is okay.

“Come on Rhys,” his voice is strained, “I didn’t interrupt you and Feyre when your bond snapped into place. No one did, let me have my fun. I deserve it after everything I’ve been through.”

I can’t help but blush even darker as Rhysand looks at me, “I know but this is important. Mor, she’s found something,” the High Lord’s eyes flash to his cousin, then back to the general, “she’s found a way that might possibly save your wings.”


Cassian holds me the entire time he speaks with Rhysand and Mor. He wanted me there as they explain the magic that these healers didn’t have, the magic that lay in the world so different from ours. He keeps me there in his lap, holding my hand as the tears threaten to spill at the idea of his wings fitting back together again. I can feel his hope, no matter how hard he tries to keep it from soaring, as he imagines flying beside his brothers once again.

“So when will they get here? When can we start, I’ll do anything to get my wings back Rhys,” he squeezes my hand and I know he is trying to keep it together for me. He has been lost without his wings. Mor, she has saved his life by finding the magic that will put them back together again.

Rhys sighs, his eyes going towards Mor. She clears her throat  and sits up straighter, “they can’t come here Cass. We have to go to them,” she winces as she looks at me, “they need to look at your wings and assess the damage. They said it could take almost a month to fully repair them.”

“We didn’t know you and Nesta would mate,” Rhysand speaks before Cassian can reply, “we told them a month was nothing and we would winnow you right there. But now,” his gaze falls on me and Cassian growls again, “now this changes things.”

The room falls deathly quiet. It is as quiet as the day we all arrived back here, two of the men wounded and barely clinging to life. Mor’s face is pale, Rhys is trying not to look at me. He’s trying not to chafe the bond that is so new, so raw between us. He knows he can’t rile up his friend, not while he is still injured.

I am the one who breaks the silence, “this changes nothing,” I say loudly, my words are bolder than I thought they would be, “Cassian will go to the healers and he will get his wings back. I survived without him once, I can survive without him again.”

His brown eyes look up at me, “Nesta, I don’t want to be away from you, I don’t want to be without you for that long. We haven’t even been able to mate properly,” his cheeks fill with pink as he ignores Rhys cough, “I can wait a little longer to get my wings back. If that means I get to keep you too.”

I roll my eyes, even though the bond screams at me to keep him here in this very bed, “we have all the time in the world to mate, Cass. You have this chance, this once chance to get a piece of yourself back. I won’t let you lose that because of me. We’ve both lost so much separately. Please, go with them.”

A tear slips down his cheek as he buries his face in my chest. I hold onto him tightly, I can feel what this means to him. I was putting him above myself, I am telling him it is okay to want this, to want his wings back. To put our bond on hold while he finds a way to heal his pain. A way to stitch himself back together. My heart fills up as he presses a kiss to my shoulder.

“I love you Nesta,” he whispers softly, barely loud enough for me to hear, “I don’t deserve you.”

“No you don’t,” I reply with a small smile, “but I love you too.”

Mor smiles as she watches us, “we have to return to the healers as soon as possible. Cassian can you winnow yourself there? They have one open spot and Rhsyand pulled a lot of strings to make them hold it for you.”

He lets me go slowly, reluctantly. I stand up off his lap and he gets out of bed just as slowly. He takes another look at me, I keep my features natural, but I know he can feel the loss through our bond. But I will lose him for a month, in order to get all of him back for the rest of my life. I smile as his big hand cups my cheek. He leans down and catches his lips to mine.

“I’ll be right here waiting,” I whisper as he pulls away.

His smile lights up the entire room. Rhysand is watching, his own smile just as big. I know he has missed his brother. He has missed his best friend who never took anything seriously. He squeezes my waist and then turns to look at Mor, “let’s go.”

Mor takes his hand, Rhysand nodding at me, before the three of them winnow out of the room. I shiver once there gone and realize that Cassian took the heat with him. It takes me a moment to realize I am alone once again. I sit down on his bed, wrapping his blanket around my shoulders. I lay down against the pillow, breathing in his scent. The tears fall silently as I start the long wait for my mate to return home.


I have no idea how Rhysand survived this long without Feyre. He makes it look easy living without his mate, he makes it look like a piece of cake. But my heart shatters inside my chest every morning I wake up and Cassian is still gone. Maybe it is easier for Rhys because the bond isn’t as fresh as mine. Maybe he doesn’t miss my sister as much as I miss his brother. Because it feels like a knife was twisting in my gut without my mate beside me everyday.

“You miss him,” Rhysand forces me to eat dinner with him every night Cassian is gone. Mor spends most of her time checking on Azriel and winnowing to check on Cassian with the healers. She isn’t around the house as much these day. I wish I could find something to keep me as busy as her.

I look at my sister’s husband, wondering how different our lives would be if she had never killed that wolf. We would still be human, I would still be the closed off one. I would still watch my little sister become the care taker, the one who fed us and found a way to keep a roof over our heads. I would still hate with a  fire I didn’t know how to extinguish inside of my soul. My life would be nothing, I know that now that the bond was in place, without the Fae in it.

I take in a shaky breath, “every moment of every day,” I answer him. He is quiet as we eat our food together, “how do you do it? How do you live without Feyre and not go crazy?”

He laughs, a soft chuckle that make me miss the loud laughter that escaped Cassian’s lips the morning we spent together. The only memory I have to hold onto until he returns to me, “it’s not easy. God I miss her, I know she’s doing her duty and protecting her people. But I miss her just as much as you miss your mate. It doesn’t get easier, it doesn’t stop killing me. I wake up every morning disappointed that her side of the bed is still empty. The only thing keeping me here is my family, my duty to the inner circle. To my brothers who sacrificed so much to get us out of that mountain alive.”

Rhysand doesn’t offer me anything else after his speech. I don’t ask him any more questions, we eat our dinner and then find our way to our separate rooms. I have started sleeping in Cassian’s room, using one of his big tunics to sleep in. His scent is fading, the days I spend in there is making it harder to find him. But I can’t find it in my heart to sleep alone in my old room. The room that had been filled with nightmares and pain.

I feel Cassian’s pain through our bond. Whatever they were doing to him, it isn’t easy for him to go through. I feel him missing me, wishing he could’ve had more time to cement our bond. But the worst pain that is shot through the bond, is the feelings that comes to him at night, after the agony of repairing his wings.

Whenever he is still he worries I will change my mind. He fears coming back to Velaris and finding me as the Nesta who had once lived back in the human realm. The Nesta who looked at him with disgust and pain in her eyes. I can feel his fear, his doubts whenever he thinks of losing me. Sometimes it gets so bad that it makes me sick to my stomach. I try to offer him soothing words to stop worrying, but it is never enough.

There were a few nights I cried myself to sleep without him. A few nights when the nightmares became too much and I couldn’t find any peace from tossing and turning on his mattress.

A month isn’t that long and yet it feels like a lifetime to me. I am sitting in the living room, Elain is playing with her knitting needles and I was still staring at the same page of a book I had tried to start reading three days ago. The house feels empty without Cassian. My life feels empty without him.

I close my eyes and I could’ve sworn I hear his laugh. Then I hear him curse, something falls to the floor with a thud. My eyes snap open and I bolt out of the arm chair I was sitting in. I run towards his room, my hands shaking as I push open the door. There he stands, his wings as good as new. Theres a few scars that line the back, something woven within the membrane to stitch them back together. They glitter in the light, but they are even more beautiful.

“Cassian,” his name falls off my lips as I bound into him. I run my hand up the valley between his wings, kissing his neck as he laughs again. I smile as he spins around, his arms lifting me up so his lips can meet mine. He doesn’t say a thing, he just kisses me, the feeling of our bodies together enough to ease the pain we’ve endured for the last few weeks.

He wipes away a tear as he pulls away, “I begged them to work as fast as they could,” he releases a breath, as if he had been holding it the entire time he was away from me, “because I needed to come back to my mate.”

I smile, breathing in his sandalwood scent and feeling at home once more, “please, promise me we’ll never be apart again.”

His fingers run through my hair, the tips of them tickling my scalp, “as long as I am alive, I will never leave you again Nesta Acheron. You are my life, my mate, my soul in flesh. I will always find you.”

I smile as he kisses me once more, his foot shutting the door so no one else can interrupt us and welcome him home. He lays me down against the mattress and I can’t help but smile. He claims me as his mate, his soul bonded. It is in that moment that I know what it truly feels like to love and be loved in return.

Steve Rogers Imagine; Baby’s coming.

This is my second imagine with Steve, I have been reading Steve’s imagine all day just to get a glimpse. Anyway, if you’d like more imagine with some other characters then don’t forget to send me your request in the ask section! It’ll make me happy.

And if I haven’t answered to your request, i’m so sorry :( i’m trying my best! 

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Reader

Warnings: Fluff, Angst.

Word Count: Lots.

Request: Hi! I saw you were taking requests and I was wondering if you could please write one where Steve and a heavily pregnant reader are both avengers and one day Steve gets seriously hurt on a mission and the stress causes the reader to go into labor so the team is there for her? Lot of fluff/angst and maybe a happy ending? Thanks soooo much! 😊

Originally posted by imagine-that-marvel

“Please be safe, I want you back in one piece.” you said to Steve as he rolled his eyes playfully at you, adjusting the strap of his mask before walking towards you.

“I promise i’ll try.” he chuckled and pecked your lips before lowering himself and giving your swollen belly a kiss, muttering some words as he then stood up and grabbed his shield, he gave you a wink before speaking up. “Okay, everybody. Let’s go, I want to be back early so me and my wife can enjoy some alone time.” the rest of the Avengers chuckled as they finished equipping themselves, you just sighed.

You sat down in the seat in front of the handles of the quinjet, strapping yourself before making it land securely on the floor as the Avengers got out with their guns on their hands and all, you earlier had hacked the security system of the place they were currently breaking in, so you were able to watch through the security cameras of the building as the guys attacked the officers and all. 

Your hand instinctively went to your belly, caressing it softly as you felt a strong kick. “I know, baby. Daddy’s just working.” you said to the baby, neither you or Steve knew the sex of the baby and you both wanted to remain in that way until he or she was born, you were dying to know if you’ll be having a little boy or a little girl, luckily the birth was only weeks away. 

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

earlier today at the barbers i just talked to the most racist xenophobic immigrants i went to get a hair cut and this young man started up a talk with me and brought up politics his mom's an immigrant and he was born here. from where i dont know but she is and voted trump. they hate muslims, they want to deport everyone and i have never been more uncomfortable or confused in my life.

Anonymous said: 

sorry i bothered you with that story i just had to tell someone

that’s okay– I’m sorry that you ran into Islamophobic bigots, it’s natural to be uncomfortable when people are spouting hate around you. 

unfortunately, marginalized people are still capable of hating other marginalized people (as we see time and again in both subtle ways like lateral aggression among wlw taking the form of lesbophobia/biphobia, and also in extreme ways like Milo WannabeFascist aligning himself with neo-nazis despite being a gay man of Jewish heritage). 

In many ways, systemic oppression relies upon the ruling class’s ability to divide marginalized groups against each other. there’s a lot of evidence to suggest that the creation of ‘whiteness’ as a racial concept was intended to use poor whites as a weapon against poor people of color so the working class would not have the solidarity needed to be able to successfully overthrow the ruling class, and saying white working class people took the bait with that would be the understatement of the millennia. 

when finding your allies, it’s always best to judge based on someone’s values and actions, not just their identity and axes of marginalization. there is huge variability of values and belief within every single group of people under any identity label or experience.