i want the receipts

Day Fifty-Seven

-I was thoroughly underwhelmed and relieved by the amount of customers we had last night when we opened the doors. Unfortunately, the real Black Friday shoppers apparently decided to wait until today to come in en masse, and it was more terrifying than I had ever imagined. Thankfully this did not stop Cat Lady from coming in four separate times during my shift without making a single purchase.

-A woman attempted to specify to me which items she wanted a gift receipt for. I would ask, “All of it?” She would reply, “No, just these,” gesturing to everything. This cycle went on for an entire minute at which point we finally reached the understanding that she did in fact want a gift receipt for everything.

-A gaggle of elderly guests shouted from a location I could not determine, repeating, “Excuse me. Excuse me.” in what was simultaneously a whisper and a shout. While it may be later than they would have hoped, I would now like to formally excuse them from all that they could have been asking for.

-Far too many people have come through the store treating Black Friday as a sport, seeing who can sacrifice the most manners to attain the most savings. The winner is whoever spends the least money while purchasing the most stuff. The loser, their cashiers.

-An older woman purchased $150 of Pokemon cards, but at no point did she mention any gift receipts or anything about presents at all. I hope this means that she is working her way towards being the best that there ever was and establishing that Pokemon trainers can, in fact, age past ten years.

-A woman in her sixties purchased Cards Against Humanity along with several expansions. Whether she is entirely unaware of what the game holds in store for her or entirely aware of what is to come, I want nothing more out of my life than to be the Czar.

-The only genuine winners of Black Friday are the two amazingly polite dads who came through with their toddlers in hand, boasting to each other of how much they saved on their kitchen appliances.

-I watched on in confusion and terror as a woman deliberately passed up dozens of smaller bills, one at a time, to ultimately draw out a $100 bill to pay for her $11 purchase. If her goal was to prove herself the highest of rollers in the store at the time, she accomplished this with flair.

-A sweet old woman entered my lane, a mysteriously goatee-shaped bandaid on her chin, pristine white gloves on her hands, a gray sweater with the hood altered to function as a cape perfecting her ensemble. I want her to adopt me as soon as we can both fit it into our schedule, or at least sign her as my fashion consultant and see if I can commission a cape-hooded hoodie from her.

-I handed a young girl the book she had so eagerly purchased. She excitedly took it and ran to the end of the lane as her parents continued the transaction and began to read the story aloud to all within earshot. She spun the tale of the two kittens with such passion that I was left wanting more than another chapter as the family left the store.

-I was greeted by a mother-daughter shopping duo who had also come through my lane the previous night. They were passionate about their savings, but equally concerned with my well-being and lack of sleep. If I had the energy, I would have wept a single tear as they walked away, leaving me behind to watch the closest things I had to friends in this shift attain the freedom I so dearly desired.

-”You have incredible hair,” a bald man told me wistfully, eyeing my unreasonably thick brown mop. The sadness in his eyes made me consider cutting off a lock to hand to him, but I thought better of it, lest we enter a giving-a-mouse-a-cookie style scenario.

-An elderly woman placed her bills down on the conveyor belt one by one to count them out. I picked them up as she placed down the first couple to ensure they were not swept under the belt. I gestured for her to place them in my hand rather than on the moving surface. Instead, she took this as a challenge, throwing her money across the counter, avoiding my hand as best as she could, cackling to herself as I made a mad dash to pick up each. I never expected this sort of chaotic evil to come from such a frail body, but I have learned my lesson. I will never underestimate a potential nemesis again.

-As I was walking towards the guest services counter, I passed a shrieking baby and a mother desperate to soothe him. I happened to have a strip of stickers in my pocket and, before thinking about it, swooped in to hand them to the child. They immediately ceased the crying and the mother shouted her thanks as I walked away. I am now a gracious sticker fairy and I will pursue this new path wholeheartedly.

-The information that I used to work at Forever 21 has leaked to the management, and I became the subject of a battle between a front end manager and a soft lines manager. I believe soft lines won out in the end and I may have been brought into a new line of work.

-A father attempted to heckle me, asking if I would accept his Kohl’s cash. I turned the tables on the man, telling him that I would gladly take it, but it would not lower his total at all. His family found this hilarious, laughing at him uproariously as he pouted to himself after being roasted so severely. Let this be a lesson to all cashier-hecklers: we are doing our best and our jobs are hard enough and some of us cope with humor and sometimes you will get brutally burned.

i love ks but the fandom is a fucking disaster

The signs as skills I have
  • Aries: crying when frustrated/angry
  • Taurus: never knowing how much lotion is enough lotion
  • Gemini: listening to the same song for days and then never listening to it again
  • Cancer: buying 10 more books when I already have 500 at home to read
  • Leo: opening a soda and taking one drink before forgetting about it and letting it go flat
  • Virgo: starting a big paper the day before it's due and getting an A on it
  • Libra: not folding laundry. ever.
  • Scorpio: starting a million projects and not finishing any of them
  • Sagittarius: filling my purse with receipts. even though i know i'm never going to do anything with them. i will throw them away. but i always say 'yes' when asked if i want my receipt
  • Capricorn: lying about having plans because i don't want to go anywhere or do anything this weekend
  • Aquarius: eating a whole frozen pizza by myself. #noshame
  • Pisces: getting really drunk but not throwing up the next day. except that one time
the worst possible thing that happened to me right when I finished training

Customer: I want to return something

Me: alright! Do you have the receipt?

Customer: no.

Me: no problem, do you have the credit card you used to purchase the item?

Customer: no.

Me: can I see the item?

Customer: no.

Me: I’m sorry?

Customer: I don’t have it. I threw it out. It didn’t work.

Me: I can’t give you a refund for an item you don’t have anymore, ma'am.

Customer: then let me speak to a manager.

Ok I am in a mood... call me crazy all you want... well it is in my name right... but seriously call me insane all day long, but until you give me answers for these I’m here sleuth shipping. I want answers for these receipts. And anti’s don’t bother with your excuses. I need to hear the answers from Sam and Cait.
Some facts about Klaine’s impact to be proud of:

Klaine are:

  1. Most reblogged Glee ship.
  2. Most popular canon ship on AO3.
  3. Glee’s only award nominated ship.
  4. 3rd most tweeted ship of all the time.
  5. Most tweeted Glee ship of all the time.
  6. Biggest amount spent per couple at Glee Auction. 
  7. Glee ship with the biggest amount of Google search results.
  8. Most popular Glee ship on fanfiction.net
  9. Most popular glee characters (Kurt and Blaine) on fanfiction.net
  10. Most popular Glee ship on AO3
  11. Most popular glee characters (Kurt and Blaine) on AO3
  12. Glee ship with the biggest amount of devianART results.
  13. Glee’s biggest amount of Liverjournal Community members.
Just call him! Warning: long post.

So I work at Red Wrath in customer service and today I had the classic woman who can’t text but wants to send texts so she speaks all of her texts into her phone for everyone to hear. Every time I get one of these I just want to scream “just call them!!!” but I don’t because I’m a Customer Service Girl™ and all that. Instead I just smile politely and wait for them.

Anyway so she brings in this Amazon Echo that’s been taken out of the box and used and the box is pretty busted. She says she doesn’t really like it and it doesn’t work with her phone (which ??? she had like a Galaxy 6 I’m pretty sure she just didn’t know how to use it) and wants to return it. I ask for the receipt and she gives me a gift receipt.

At this point I remember a comment my store manager made about not wanting to take back Echos that have been opened and used (because we can’t sell them at full price if they’re opened, but Amazon forbids us from discounting them) so I tell her I’m gonna need to call a manager for confirmation. She just says “okay” and while I’m on my walkie asking my manager if it’s okay to return she pulls out her phone and starts speaking into her phone: “they’re trying to give me a hard time because it’s open!” I just kind of frown and by the time she hits send my manager gives me the okay to return it.

So I go through the process of pulling up the receipt and typing in the UPC (because the one on the box was ripped off), and tell her that I’m going to give her $151.54 in store credit. She gets really upset for two reasons: why isn’t it $180? Also, why can’t I have cash? I explain that during the holidays the Echos were on sale for $40 off, and that when we return with gift receipts we give store credit to prevent fraud. So she whips out her phone and says: “now they’re trying to give me store credit! What the fuck!” and sends it to whoever.

She takes the Echo and says she’s going to try to get the original receipt. About half an hour later she comes back into the store and says she’s going to have her brother send her a copy of the receipt. I call my manager again to make sure I can accept a photo copy and she (you guessed it) takes out her phone and says “now they won’t take a photo copy!!” But this time before she’s done talking my manager says yes so I just look at her as she stares back at me and puts her phone away. She stays quiet as she walks away and ten minutes later she comes back and has the photo copy that’s been texted to her. I ask her to have her brother text her that he’s okay with the return being done in cash rather than go back to his card. This time she doesn’t bitch, just asks him for permission and he texts back that it’s okay. I do the return and give her the cash and she leaves.

As she goes though, she takes out her phone and says “finally leaving the fucking store!”

TLDR; If you can’t text your brother with your own two hands, just call him.


As much as I love Instagram and blogging and social media in general, I still have great appreciation for more old school ways of documenting things. The process of writing something down on actual paper and taping photos into a journal is os satisfying, and when you actually fill up that book and finish it, the gratification you feel is even greater. That’s why I carry my black moleskin journal with me everywhere, along with a little pack of fine tip markers, tape and my polaroid. Whether I’m downtown Toronto at a cafe or on a beach in Cannes, I want to be able to snap a quick photo, save any receipts, flyers or other items and write about it right away. So far I have finished one book and am halfway through another, but someday I hope to have a library filled with black moleskins that document every moment of my life.

Since most of my journal pages are about my travels, I decided it be fitting to share some photos of them on here. I’ll shut up now and let the photos do the talking since, you know, they’re worth 1000 words and all.

Once an old lady came up to my register and as I was ringing her up she was slightly giving me the tone that every question I was asking her was annoying or wrong? Like she said them all with like a smile but it sounded like annoyed parent voice

Me: Do you have a rewards card?
Her, digging through her purse: I’m getting it RIGHT now :)
Me, eyeing her huge purse: Do you need a bag?
Her: Well, of COURSE :)

And then when I asked her if she wanted her receipt, which I ask everyone who doesn’t immediately walk away, she gets the most annoying and this part really made me irritated

Me, a simple meme farmer: Do you want your receipt?
Her, apparently knows better than me: Don’t ever ask that question. I’ve been shopping at greenwalls for a long time and I know that it’s greenwalls policy to always give the receipt :)
Me, done: Have a nice day ma'am :))))))))))))

And then she went to the next cashier’s counter talk to my coworker, an older lady that love to chat with customers and is friends with lots of them

As that’s happening, the young guy who walked up to the line just as I was finishing the last transaction came up to my register with like one item. At the end, while the lady was still right next to us chatting, I asked if he wanted his receipt and he laughed and rolled his eyes towards the lady and said no. That made me feel better because that means it’s not just me who thought she was being annoying lol

I mean, I’ve been working here for almost a year and was trained on the register by the coworker the lady was actually talking to! She asks people if they want their receipts, literally everyone does, even the managers when they ring. No one ever told me it was policy to just give them whether the customer wants it or not. Even other locations ask 😞