i want a neighbor like this

anonymous asked:

I was just curious about your take on spirit work? Do you believe some people are more naturally gifted at it? How do you recommend to start practicing it? Is it safe to practice? I've always wanted to work with spirits, but when I try, nothing happens and I just end up having weird and chaotic nightmares instead. Not just that, but I had been hearing sounds from my neighbors for weeks. But I just found out that our neighbor died months ago, and the other one is in the hospital?

Spirit work is like any other talent, like math, gymnastics, studying or running. Some people are more naturally gifted than others, but everyone needs to practice. I recommend starting with energy work in order to enter spirit work. 

Sometimes, when new practitioners begin to dabble in the spirit realm, it irks the spirits around them, causing them to act up more. They may get rowdy, or try to scare you, or even go after your teacher if you have one. Keep working, vamp up your wards and protection, and try to keep your anxiety to a minimum. Spirit work is one of the more dangerous paths out there, but it can also be one of the more rewarding ones. If you play it smart, and don’t doubt your power, you’ll be fine.

You can check out my free spirit work course for more information. Good luck! 

But I don’t want small talk. Text me, and without saying hello, tell me why you got so angry at your neighbor this morning. Tell me why you have a scar shaped like the letter S on your palm. Send me paragraphs about the time you spent at your grandmother’s house that one summer. Call me when I’m half asleep and tell me why you fear owls . Tell me about the first time you saw your dad cry. Tell me about your friends’ childhood funny stories, tell me about the little girl who used to annoy you when you were kids. Text me at 4 AM to tell me about the dream that woke you up , come at my door to show me your writings . Talk to me about your wildest dreams that you feel embarrassed to share with anyone Go on for hours about things that may not seem important because I promise that I’ll be hanging on to every word you say. Tell me everything. I don’t want someone who just talks about the weather.
—  warmsnow07 
Signs and Crushes

Aries: Pretty upfront about it, always on the lookout for someone and when they find that perfect someone they cling on. You’ll know if they like you by the measure of inside jokes you have, the amount of touching and eye contact. Pay attention next time their around. Give it some time and eventually they’ll tell you.

Taurus: Timid about it. They’re very fun people and love to just go with you anywhere. Very vexing and charming signs, so they might feel unattainable to you. In nature they doubt themselves, so they might feel the same about you. That being said, they most likely will go to their grave simply crushing on you. Maybe it’s best you make the first move with this sign.

Gemini: Like Taurus, this sign is timid about liking you. They want you to make the first move and tell them you like them. When it comes to crushes, this sign might do the most discreet things like tagging you in a post or remembering your pet’s name. Loves to laugh at memes with you. Wants to take you to new places but doesn’t know how to ask. Very gentle. Probably best you make the first move.

Cancer: Very lovey-dovey. Loves to compliment you in small ways and it might be pretty obvious they like you. Compliment them back, you’ll notice how they blush and smile. Very cute. You might also notice how they want to invite you in with their own friends. It is either-or with this sign when it comes to crushes. Depending on the person, you might want to tell them yourself.

Leo: A very fierce sign. They get what they want because of their strong demeanor. They’ll charm you into their lives and never let you go. When this sign likes you, they’ll be fairly shy at first, but pay attention to body language. Do they laugh a lot? Focus all of their attention on you? Once they’re comfortable with you, they don’t hold anything back.

Virgo: This sign needs to know that you mutually like them. They don’t go off on a limb and assume things. They don’t ask you on a date out of nowhere, even if they do suspect you like them back. They’re a logical sign, and they just need to know that the feelings are reciprocated. Therefore, it might not be that obvious that they have a crush on you. They want to get to know you better and understand your intentions. Once they do, they’ll open up to you and be very obvious when it comes to liking you.

Libra: A truly kind sign. Once you get close enough to them, they’re willing to do anything for that special someone. They love to brag about you to their friends and you might find yourself on their social media frequently. Eventually, they may come around to telling you how they truly feel.

Scorpio: Now you and I both know a Scorpio will tell you, your family, your neighbors, and your friends that they like you. They don’t hold much back. It takes a while to crack that hard shell of theirs, but once you do there is no going back. It might be overbearing at times, but Scorpio only has the best intentions at heart. You know they like you if they put you above anyone else.

Sagittarius: Very withdrawn when it comes to having crushes. They feel like they fail at love and so, when they do have a crush, they hold back completely. They love to laugh with you and adventure with you. Give them some time, and they’ll come around. Do not bombard them by confronting them instantly.

Capricorn: Similar to sagittarius, this sign is very withdrawn. They have a rather passive personality and will play it off as if you’re not much in their life. You might take notice to this. However, they think the world of you. Have some late-night mushy conversations with them and you’ll know they think the world of you. They’re a sweet sign, but they can break your heart in an instant.

Aquarius: This sign is bubbly when they like you. Very kind and smiley. They love the finer things in life and they aren’t afraid of showing you. Beautiful people both inside and out and you definitely don’t want to lose them. They make it obvious when they like you. It’s the little things in life that mean the most of them. So if they show you things like little places around town and beautiful, hidden scenery then you should just know.

Pisces: A reserved sign, or at least they try to be. When it comes to them liking you, honey, you’ll know. Compliments out the wazoo. Tries to make you laugh as much as possible. They always think about you, always. They worry for you, get excited for you, and will love you unconditionally. They have an obsessive personality and when they have a crush on you, all that obsession is pointed to you. They get so scared that they’ll mess up somehow. They make amazing lovers, but they will leave if something feels wrong.

ARIES: I heard that somebody with icicles in their chest once told you that spring was only for people that know how to be wanted but they were lying. Hardly anybody takes care of honesty the way that you do and somehow that’s still a surprise. Take the weight of your insecurities and lay them to rest underneath a gravestone. When wildflowers grow from what you buried don’t bother to pick them. They’ll always be there. Don’t you know what it’s like to come back to things? 

TAURUS: The peach pit on your dresser has been sitting there for years and it’s okay that you can’t throw it out yet. Okay that you can’t put it back into the fruit and unbite all of the soft and the sweet and the “maybe this time it’ll be different” that leaked out onto your fingers on the nights that your teeth feel too used to be desired. Wash your sheets and dry them outside. Lay underneath the clothes line and listen. Unclench your fists. Rewrite the grocery list.

GEMINI: It isn’t your fault that not everyone can swallow the parts of you that have sharp edges. You’ve been spending too much time forcing yourself down the linen aisle when you should be finding the nearest comic book store. There’s a reason superman is nicknamed “man of steel” and you deserve all of the iron-throated hearts that you can find. Invest in a metal detector. Don’t be ashamed of what you find.

CANCER: The way you bare your chest to the world is terribly brave and I don’t want you to continue feeling responsible for the people you’ve kissed that have taken advantage of that. Skin-deep damage does not make you unlovable, it gives you new perspectives. Don’t apologize for the ways you have tried to survive this. You’re better than the fires you’ve walked through and the storms you’ve caused. Suck on a peppermint until it loses its flavor. Name the taste after your last heartbreak. Now spit it out.

LEO: Your chest caves in whenever you think about the past and nobody’s ever told you that everything is temporary. Well, honey, I have some news for you. Start checking the mailbox again before the neighbors start to worry. People still want to stain paper with your name and martyring yourself over words is something you’ve become too talented at. Take a break, now and again. Burn the television set if that’s what it takes. Air out the smoke and look into a mirror, admire how powerful you seem as you step out of the haze of what’s gone.

VIRGO: Oh, baby, you’ve made mistakes and you’ve drained the bottles but you’re not the only one who’s felt like this. I know that it’s hard to let yourself feel these things but you have to try, you have to let the light in. It’s so dark in the room you’ve been using to store your regrets and your pallor has become a reflection of the ghosts you’ve been taking orders from. You were made for the sun. Let it kiss you without repercussion. Allow yourself to kiss it back.

LIBRA: So maybe you dropped too many pennies down the wishing well and now your wallet is nothing more than negative space. So maybe you forgot who gave you that good advice that one time and you’re still beating yourself up over it. Go ahead, admit to your faults. Set a place for them at the table and scold them for being late. Eat their portion and kick them out. Being familiar with every side to your geometric personality is not something to be ashamed of. Remember the angles, and keep moving. People like you are not meant to stand still.

SCORPIO: I think that your ears were made for listening to things that break. The shattering of a vase. The cracking of a heart. Does it ever get exhausting to be so awfully aware of how things sound when they forget to function? Nobody expects you to take every smashed hope and piece it together on your own. You are not a bottle of glue no matter how much you feel disaster sticks to you. I promise. You don’t have to carry that toolbox around, anymore. It looks heavy. Set it down.

SAGITTARIUS: You have your father’s mouth and consequently have dreams where you’re ripping it from your face. Somebody told you once that you were inadequate and now there’s a bruise on your ego and you can’t seem to stop touching it. Why are you so obsessed with how long it takes to heal? Why are you so afraid of letting people see you cry? Take off your armor and let your skin breathe. There’s still time to be okay with the idea of loss. You’re not too late. You’re not too late.

CAPRICORN: Stop using the word pathetic whenever anybody asks you to describe yourself. The people that hold you accountable for the abuse you’ve endured are the ones that turn away whenever they see it. You don’t need them, you never did. Can you feel that prickling sensation running up your arms? It’s tomorrow knocking and it wants to show you something beautiful. Let it. You’ve handled tragedy, surely you can handle tenderness.

AQUARIUS: You’ve been fucked over so many times it’s hard not to see yourself as a hotel room on the outskirts of town. Dark red bedsheets and rusty doorknobs and a lampshade that hasn’t been touched in a decade or two, this is where you lie and try to erase the memories from your naked body. You don’t want to belong to anybody almost as much as you don’t want people to believe they’ve changed you. They haven’t, you know that right? No matter how many people hike up mount everest it’s still a mountain. It’s still bigger than what’s stepping on it. It still keeps its name.

PISCES: You’ve become so good at sacrificing yourself for the possibility of something worthwhile that your body looks more like an altar than an assortment of bones. If this is your church I hope that your god looks like your nine year old face whenever somebody asked what you wanted to be when you grew up. I hope your prayer sounds like an exhale and that your choir sings in harmony and that every donation tastes like honey. Don’t forget to bow your head every once in a while. Remind yourself of your feet. Of how fast you’re able to run.

—  APRIL HOROSCOPES, 2/30, Caitlin Conlon

Everything great about Tony Stark in Spider-Man Homecoming:

  • He was totally cool with Peter making a vlog and went along with it
  • He made an inappropriate flirtatious comment about Aunt May and immediately apologized for it
  • The way he acted for that entire scene.
  • Like… he knew Peter was really looking up to him and he had no idea how to handle that and he tried his best to play it cool.
  • “Bye.“
  • He saved Peter’s life from THE OTHER SIDE OF THE WORLD!!
  • He installed Peter’s suit with anything that would keep him safe, including a parachute and a goddamn heater because what if my son goes out and it’s cold and he forgot a sweater?
  • He called the FBI about the weapons and told Peter to stay away from it because he didn’t want Peter to get in any more danger
  • He called Peter to tell him he was proud of Peter’s work at Washington DC and that he had underestimated him.
  • He went into ‘Suspicious Dad‘ mode the instant he heard the siren on the boat.
  • “Hey, Spider-Man. How’s band practice?”
  • Translation: “you are so grounded.“
  • He told Peter off and then went ‘Great, now I sound like my dad.‘ Oh god, he’s still haunted by how badly his father raised and he doesn’t want to have the same impact on Peter. This man needs a hug like, now.
  • “If you’re nothing without this suit, than you shouldn’t have it.“
  • He made an ENTIRE NEW SUIT for him and was totally ready to unveil Spider-Man as a new Avenger to the world because he is just so proud of his Spider son.
  • He doesn’t object when Peter says no and decides to go back to just being a friendly neighbor hood superhero for the time being.
  • HE’S BACK TOGETHER WITH PEPPER!!
  • He gave Peter his suit back.

so here’s another AU idea, since there’s this online sex shop that’s located in the same building as a hardware store and they’re both owned by the same person, so for discretion’s sake the things you order from the sex shop are sent in packages from the hardware store but a lot of people know about that ruse. now please imagine character A being a bit of a social recluse and always ordering things from the hardware store, unaware of the existence of the sex shop, meanwhile their neighbor character B, who always receives the packages by accident, knows about the sex shop and gets gradually more impressed by the sizes of the packages, believing character A to be kinky and always teasing them like “wow, you really seem to love some good, hard ware” and character A is just really, really confused 

i cant believe michael mell killed everyone by just existing 

im love him 

Dan and Phil’s Liveshow // 4.27.17

First liveshow in the new house

Dan is wearing the pink Sydney shirt

Phil is wearing a new grey/blue/green? hoodie 

Random box of shit that they went through

Many box paper cuts

Moving video recap

The London Apartment was like the F.R.I.E.N.D.S apartment

They’re still going to be making videos and they brought their stuff no need to fret

The new house is a duplex

They’re still renting RIP to the dog dreams for now

They’re drowning in cardboard boxes

There’s a semi transparent glass door in the lounge

Easter baking (Phil still doesn’t know what they’re called)

“Whisk it harder” -Phil

Phil’s bedroom is going to be pretty much the same don’t get too hyped about new interior design

Dan’s bedroom will be almost completely different (apparently it looks like the moon?)

Dan got rid of the bedspread but Phil kept his (he secretly has 2 the entire time)

They are yet to meet the neighbor

“’When will you get a dog?’ I guess when the house is bought and there’s no landlord.”

The gaming background will look weirdly similar 

“Gaming lighting will be dank”

Dan’s filming area is through the door thing through the longue 

Dan didn’t want to play i spy on the flight back from Singapore what a bitch

They watched Fantastic Beasts (3/5 stars), Lion (ugly crying), Hacksaw Ridge (Dan cried the entire second half of the movie) on the flight 

They went to a night zoo in Singapore which was really cool

Phil was convinced an elephant was trying to come after him

Dan wanted to see absolutely everything 

They haven’t listened to the new Fall Out Boy song yet

They’re enjoying the new place a lot just getting adjusted 

Phil will still film in his bedroom (apparently the landlord thought he was going to film a porno)

They have a Lounge and a chill lounge (currently they’re in the chill lounge which is where they’ll film)

Dan got a white piano

Phil is constantly taking creepshots

Maybe they’ll get a fish

The Art Science Museum in Singapore was lit 

Phil the Photographer

Phil’s hood has gone up #news

Dan did a lot of crying on that trip

Basically Singapore was just really cool

Dan stuck his foot through the leg of the ripped jeans

“What is it with Australia inspiring me to paint my nails” 

#cocktus 

Phil may attempt to curl his hair for a video at some point

Phil will be away in Florida after Playlist with his family on holiday so he’ll tweet about when he’ll do the next liveshow

The 1D poster is gone #rip

The last gaming video was a good send off

This year is very much about them and their lives

Dan got a bonsai for is desk

Dan has one more dinof video filmed in the old house 

This one isn’t a forever home

“You sneaky weasels” 

“It suits him. Embrace the natural curls.” Phil on Dan’s curls

The new place doesn’t really have a name but Thor is a possibility

Phil probably wouldn’t paint his nails because he doesn’t like having stuff on his (like tattoos or pen marks) just as a personal preference 

DINOF video most likely on Monday and Dan liveshow on Tuesday

“We hope that we’re been two virtual buddies to you”

“Goodbyeeeeeee”

6

via [x]

[Mikki Kendall tweeted: “I am fascinated by how many people have assumed the kid having the tantrum on the train is on the spectrum & thus needs extra patience. I can say with some authority a Black kid on the spectrum having that same issue wouldn’t get half as much patience nor would his parent. My youngest is on the spectrum. He had a tantrum in our house when he was 2. My white neighbor threatened to call the cops on me. But okay… When I tell you that my kids couldn’t act that way? That’s totally the voice of experience. Because Black boys on the spectrum can’t do that. At least not if you want to avoid being reported to DCFS or having them handcuffed at school or you know… shot by a cop. Just saying. This is the voice of bitter Black mom speaking though. Because I spend 2-3 days every year at his school dealing with racist assumptions. Black boys do not get to have tantrums in public. They do not get to have them at school either. No matter what’s going on. Trust me on that. Because (and here is indeed a fuck you very much) they will get killed if they cannot control themselves. No matter what’s going on. I have to make sure kid #2 doesn’t have a meltdown in public, isn’t too loud at home either. We live in the hood for a reason. If he’s having a rough day? My neighbors won’t call the cops. They will look out for him. But then they’re Black & they get it. We literally work with him constantly on impulse control & self soothing. Because I want him to live past 20. [link to related NPR article]

“There’s no compassion for kids like my son. My patience for your white ass feelings about Black parenting is pretty much nonexistent. I’m a hardass. I know that. I do. But then I’ve had a dozen  giant red warning signs that my kid can’t stay alive if he’s not in control. Get at me when your kid on the spectrum has a meltdown & you get a call about the possibility of charges being pressed for yelling. Because he’s tall & Black & repeated the same profanity as all the other kids involved in the fight. Call me when you realize he’s at risk. I want you to sit at a table & listen to an adult white woman tell you she doesn’t like teaching your kid because he’s scary at 8. Not that he’s been violent or threatening. Nope. He just yelled at her one day after she blamed him for being bullied. Go to that meeting. Get a call about your kid being a problem because he’s too flat when he speaks. Not that he’s done anything. They don’t like his voice. Have the “We’re going to write him up for trespassing” conversation because your kid sat in an empty classroom to study. Have that call. My kids get good grades. They don’t do half the shit I did. But I have two sons & I stay in their schools keeping them safe from admins. Meanwhile one of my neighbors did 10 years for attempted murder. He’s got no training. But he stops & chats with every kid on our block. He warns them off gangs & listens when they’re mad. He helped teach kid #2 to throw a football. Because he knows how easy it is to get lost. The grace you show to white kids? Try showing it to all kids. Our girls aren’t grown at 5 & our boys aren’t weapons at birth.“]

That Night

I had just come out the shower and was now chilling in my boxers. There I was laying in my bed watching the Justice League DVD on a Saturday night while my room mate was out having fun at the club on this rainy night. In my opinion, this was a better way to spend my night instead of going out in the rain to get sick. I am Derek, a slender light skinned black male with brown eyes. I’m not much of a party enthusiast as most in my age category of 18 are but I am human and my dick was starting to make me aware of that fact as it ascended from slumber. If you haven’t guessed already, I’m a virgin. I lowered the TV volume and just as I was about to give it some attention, there was a text notification sound on my phone .

Me (Derek Towers)

My friend AJ hit me up on whatsapp. Now AJ was an attractive guy with an amazing ass and what I had to guess was a pretty good size dick. I could only imagine as I saw the outline once while we were on the beach. AJ was an easygoing fellow about a year older than myself. We met at my job at the hotel where I was a waiter and he was a lifeguard. He was cool and we got along great but he was ridiculously homophobic and there was no way I was going to let him know that I played for both teams.

After our conversation, I still had my little problem. I opened the tumblr app on my phone and scrolled down looking at sexy guys for hours, occasionally watching some porn video. Eventually, I saw a new story by my favorite author @morrisondauthor​ entitled  “Freak by Night 7: Freaky Sneaky.” His stories are always so sexy that I find myself ejaculating before I get to the end. I get so upset when he takes a while to post his stories because they give me life and take me to a world I could never imagine. For some reason, the context usually gets me hornier than the images he uses. I got to the good part and it made me so close to my climax when my phone notification alarmed me. If you haven’t guessed, it was AJ letting me know he got home safely. He went on to tell me about his night and how he had four rounds of sex with his date in her car and she came all 4 times. I was so jealous, I was trying to come once to satisfy myself and he interrupted me boasting about his extravagant time. Now all I had in my mind were images of his sexy ass f***ing her sexy ass in the car and my vivid imagination made me ten times hornier. I had to get my nut so I told him the truth.

Me: You got your nut now I’m going to work on mine

Him: With Pamela? 😂😂😂 Night. Don’t forget the jergens.

I didn’t dignify him with a response. Instead I went to the living room and sat in the couch with nothing on but my boxer briefs. My dick stuck fully erect through the hole in my boxers and I jacked away once again replaying Morrison’s story in my head imagining it was me coming down the stairs to a sexy surprise. The sound of the thunderstorm outside with sprinkles of rain violently pelleting the window fueled my hormones and I could feel my balls ready to release the seed from their constraints. Suddenly there was a loud crash at my doorstep synonymous with a lightning bolt outside which ignited fear into my heart and caused me to forget that I was horny. Cautiously I approached the door and peered through the peep hole to notice nobody standing in the hallway. Still my curiosity wouldn’t let me rest so I opened the door ready to put my self defense skills to the test if I needed it. Imagine my disappointment when I viewed my roommate, Kevin wet from head to toe lying at our doorstep in the fetal position. He appeared to be highly intoxicated and since he doesn’t have a car, I can only assume that a Good Samaritan literally dropped him at the door. As the epinephrine wore off, I started to realize that I was once again disturbed from achieving my natural high.

Even though I was upset, I couldn’t leave him there like that so I dragged him inside. Like AJ, Kevin was straight, usually requesting that I keep the “gay shit” to myself. Yes, he knew about me. I’ve known him since we were kids because we were neighbors and grew up living in each other’s homes. When I found out that I had a taste for both girls and boys, I was around 13 and Kevin was the only person I told at the time. His reaction to the news could have been better. He called me a faggot and stormed out of my house. We didn’t speak for weeks afterward. Eventually he came to me randomly one day and apologized. I couldn’t forgive him and asked him to leave letting him know just how much he hurt me. He didn’t give up though and proved himself from that day forth that he wanted to be my best friend again. He fought off bullies, walked with me home from school and acted like the friend he was before I told him. I forgave him after a while and we were boys again. He constantly tries to get me to go out and drink with him but like I said before, I really don’t have a taste for it. We got this apartment when we moved to Florida for college and we get along well despite his occasional battles with alcoholism. Even so, it’s never been this bad.Kevin loved the gym and he worked out every weekday evening at 5 and went jogging every morning at 6. He took his physical health very seriously which is why I never understood why he drank alcohol. He also managed to maintain above average grades for his track and field scholarship at UCF.

Kevin Dill

I lifted Kevin off the floor and even though he was rather heavy, got him to the bathtub and removed the wet clothes from his barely responsive body. I haven’t seen him naked since we took baths together as kids but when I saw his naked body I had to step back and admire the marvelous muscular masterpiece. My eyes wandered to his dick which wasn’t even hard yet his uncircumcised attachment was 7 inches long and fatter towards the base. I finally snapped back into reality left to get a glass of warm water and an empty bucket in case he vomited. I ran some warm water in the bathtub and thoroughly bathed him. I couldn’t believe I was cleaning a grown man, but I didn’t want him to go into hypothermia. Not only was he drunk, but he was also wet from the cold rain. He started to gain a reasonable level of consciousness.

“Derek? What are you doing?”

“You’re drunk and cold just relax and drink this.”

I gave him an aspirin and the glass of warm water and watched him take it.

“I’m naked”

“I know”

“Why?”

“You were wet and unconscious”

“You couldn’t let me sleep it off?”

“I’m sorry would you rather get a cold or die from dehydration and hypothermia?”

He sucked his teeth, “you didn’t have to remove my boxers.”

“Hey if it’s wet it comes off.”

“Get out,” he said covering his private area.

“Nope, you could pass out at any minute. Look, I already lifted your heavy ass in here, removed your clothes by myself then took my bare hands and wiped your dirty ass. In fact it was my hands that peeled back your foreskin and cleaned your penis. It’s a little too late for modesty.”

He was speechless so I said, “What’s that on the floor? Pick it up you’re making a mess.”

He looked down, “What? What are you talking about?”

“Your bottom lip, now get out the tub and come dry off”

“Ha Ha…very funny,” he sarcastically mumbled as he stumbled out the bathtub.

I was right there to catch him with a towel and prevent him from falling. I began to dry his body when he smartly remarked, “I can do it myself you know”

I removed my body support and he dropped to the ground barely breaking his fall with his forearms.

“I thought you had it.”

“Help me up”

“Help me up what?”

“Help me up please”

“Help me up please what?”

“D’, I’m not saying that”

“Ok,” I began to leave the room.

“Fine, Please help me up Supreme Overlord Towers”

“No problem.” I helped him up and noticed he had an erection.

“Friend of yours?” I teased.

“Shut up!”

I assisted him to his bedside and helped him slide on his boxers.

“I feel so embarrassed,” he admitted

“Why? It’s just us here, chill.”

“This is not fair. You’ve seen me naked now and I even got hard,” he slapped his face in embarrassment.

“We used to bathe together all the time, washing each other’s backs and laughing at each other’s nakedness. What’s the big deal?”

He couldn’t make eye contact and stayed quiet so after sucking my teeth, I slid off my boxers, threw them to the side and danced around in a circle wagging my dick from left to right.

“Woah!” He exclaimed.

“Now I don’t have on anything. Are you happy now?”

He laughed hysterically, “that’s not what I meant.”

“Go to bed.” I helped him lay down and covered him with a warm blanket.

I turned around to leave but to my surprise, he grabbed my hand, “Please, don’t leave me again.”

“Again? I never left you.”

He burst into tears, “yes you did. When I called you by that word and you got upset with me, I didn’t know what to do with myself. I never wanted to lose my best friend. Those were the hardest months of my life, I never even cried over a girl like that.”

Confused, all I could say was, “This must be the alcohol talking.” I turned to leave again.

“Please!” He shouted.

“Okay, okay, just don’t yell like that again. The neighbors are sleeping.”

“Sleep here tonight.”

“If that would make you feel better, fine, but don’t vomit on me please.” I went to the corner to get my boxers.

“You don’t need those.”

Once again, confused but internally contented. I happily obliged, turned off the light went on the other side of his queen sized bed, pulling the covers over my exposed body.

“Good night.”

“Good night.”

The sound of rain pattering on the window echoed in the room and I was falling asleep. Unexpectedly, I felt a warm gentle touch on my dick that slammed the emergency brake of the train to dreamland. My dick was being massaged by none other than my best friend. I silently protested in my head not wanting to disturb the amazing sensation I was feeling which caused me to leak pre-ejaculation fluid. My brain finally gained control and I managed to stop him.

“Wait, what are you doing?”

“Shh. Just let it happen.”

“Now you sound like a rapist. This has to be the alcohol affecting you. You are not in your right frame of mind.” I got up and as I was standing up to leave, he pulled my hand and I landed supine right on the side of him. He lay against me leaning on his side I could see the shadow of his head in front of me and I could feel he was staring at me. Lightning flashed and I saw the look in his eyes that paralyzed me for that moment. I felt the heat radiating from his head increasing in intensity as he slowly approached my face. I felt like Chris from Get Out in the hypnosis scene, helplessly watching this happen through the windows of my eyes. When the eternity passed and he connected with my lips, the curtains closed but I could sense the brightest flashes of lightning outside. I regained control and participated in the best kiss of my life. Opening our eyes and pulling apart met us with nature’s fireworks applauding our performance.

“Wow,” we chorused.

He grabbed my body and brought me into a passionate make out session, rubbing his well toned body against mine allowing me to once again feel it’s shape, this time against my own. He went down to the left side of my neck and started sucking on it while rubbing his hands all over my back down to my bare ass. I hate hickeys but the euphoria was too intense to stop. I felt electricity flowing through my body as he continued. He kissed his way down to my left nipple and I expressed a soft moan. It felt like there was a string directly attached to the pleasure nerves in my dickhead. He continued kissing down my abs until he got to my pubic hairs and he got up. My eyes opened reacting to the sudden pause. We breathed deeply and synchronized.

“I never did anything with a dude before,” he admitted

“I’m still a virgin,” I countered.

“I know.”

I felt my face blush with embarrassment only to be aroused with pleasure at the immediate moist warm sensation that came from the head of my dick. Did he really just put my dick in his mouth? I looked down and he continued down the nine and a half inch solid shaft managing to get half of it in his mouth. That was the most mind blowing feeling in my life.

“You sure you never did this before?”

He chuckled and continued up and down repetitively sending me to a new level of heaven. He paused again and I couldn’t handle any more suspense. I reversed our positions and did exactly as he did to me in the same sequence. I thought my reaction was intense but as I sucked his neck his hands went all over my body and their favorite place was my ass. I worked my way to his nipples and he let out the sexiest deep moan that I couldn’t compare to all my years of watching porn. It send jolts through my body causing me to be extra turned on. I couldn’t take it anymore, I had to know what that dick tasted like. I skipped his abs and went straight to his pubic hairs which like mine were short lavishing in the musk they produced. I licked his dick from the base along the underside to the tip where I licked around the head tasting the pheromones produced. I experimented sticking my tongue in the entrance and he jumped.

“That was intense!” he smiled

I continued taking his head in my throat and he rewarded me with another deep moan. I continued my assault down the shaft attempting to go as far as I could. I made it as far as about 3 inches when ii felt my teeth hit his skin and I pulled back thinking about how much that hurt.

“Easy with the teeth baby”

Baby? If I wasn’t black I’m sure my face would be an apple right now. I tried again, this time opening my mouth as wide as I could and I made it down 5 inches of his eleven before I started to choke and retreat for air. He moaned again and that made me determined to get to the base. I went for it again this time holding my breath and swallowing as I went down fighting hard to resist the urge to cough. I think I made it as far as 9 inches that time but it was as far as I could possibly go. He let out another deep moan lasting longer than any of the predecessors.

“Damn baby no girl ever committed to going that far down.”

I was happy to satisfy him but after that I went up and down taking in only what I could manage, slobbering all over that sexy tool of his. After a few minutes, he pulled my head up and lead me in another intense kiss.

“I want to make love to you baby.” He stared intimately at me.

“How?”

“I want to fuck you.”

“You gotta let me fuck you too”

“No way I’m letting you anywhere near my ass with that thing.” He protested

“And I’m supposed to let you in mine?”

“Yeah but I love you and I want to prove it to you by taking your virginity.”

“I love you too and you can prove your love by letting me fuck you and take your virginity as well”

“I’m not a virgin.”

“Your ass is.”

“You always did have a smart mouth. It’s one of your most attractive qualities.”

“Well, the ball is in your court”

“Ugh….Okay, just go easy on me please.”

“I could say the same.”

“Okay turn over.”

“Umm no. We need to do a couple things to prepare first”

“We? Things like what?”

“Yes we! Come on, I’ll show you”

I went in my bedroom and grabbed my fleet. It’s a good thing I got two new bottles just in case a miracle happened. Didn’t think I’d get to use them so soon. I researched online how to prepare a long time ago and even practiced a couple of times. I taught Kevin what to do and after a while we were ready. We returned to his bedroom and turned his desk lamp on dimly. The patter of the rain was the only sound for a brief moment.

“That felt wierd,” he complained.

“Well there’s one more step we have to take,” I handed him the tube of lube.

“Hold on no need to rush just yet, I want to taste that ass first,” He kissed me intently then moved both of my legs up and attacking my asshole like it was his last meal. I don’t know which was better, that blowjob or the other level he was sending me to while he ate me. I felt his tongue go places that I didn’t know anything could. All of a sudden, I had this epileptic episode I couldn’t control. I was so weak after he finally finished with me. He grabbed the lube and inserted a finger inside my hole to open me up. He worked his second finger in there. and was about to enter.

“You better go up to 4 fingers, that thing is huge”

The third finger hurt like pins and needles. and the fourth was even worse. I really thought I was bleeding. He waited until I was comfortable, somehow managing to remain hard during the entire exercise. I guess he was as horny as I was. He entered me in the missionary position and I felt a sudden sharp pain as he passed my sphincter that sent kilojoules of electricity through my body. I cried and wanted to stop but he held me down and comforted me,

“Relax baby, just relax.”

I took slow deep breaths until the pain eased and he did not move. He waited until I was comfortable before he continued penetrating me at a steady pace. He didn’t go all the way in but he started a slow rhythm with about three inches of his massive meat. He only went further when I was in agreement. I stopped the rhythm and pushed him on his back without severing our connection. Gently I lowered myself onto his rod taking inch by inch until to my surprise, I fit the whole thing in there. I was so proud I almost didn’t notice the euphoric look on Kevin’s face.

“Damn baby, you sexy as f***,” he complimented.

I began a steady rhythm on him and I could feel him hitting my spot every time. Our session went on for a while. We went in every position we could imagine possible until he had me on my belly leaning against the edge of the bed drilling me.

“Hold on baby, you’re going to make me come,” I warned.

“That’s the plan baby,” he smirked.

I realized what he was trying to do and used every will power I had to stop myself from coming and resist him, ending that part of our session.

“You think you’re slick. I’m f***ing your ass tonight.” I retaliated.

He had a look of disappointment on his face but he lie back, removed his condom and succumbed to my wishes. He lie on his back rolling his eyes and pulled his leg up to reveal the prettiest pink spot I’ve ever seen in my life (only one I saw in person but it didn’t compare to anything in porn). I had to treat something so precious with the utmost care. I gently licked it for a few minutes before I let my tongue explore every delicious crevice of his ass it could reach. I imagine his ass would taste like ass but his was surprisingly sweet. I stuck my tongue inside and was shocked when I heard a deep moan escape his lips. I guess he was enjoying this as much as I was. I continued until I tasted something extra sweet and when I looked at it, it was a white fluid. I think he came from his ass. Damn I made him cream from eating him. I couldn’t believe it. His ass was moister than my tongue and I tasted as much as I could before grabbing the bottle of lube. I didn’t think I’d need it but I did not want to hurt him nor did I want him to chicken out. I inserted 2 of my fingers and they went in without a struggle. I had to fight with the third and fourth because his ass had a constant death grip on them. I positioned myself for entry and took it slow with him, exercising as much care as he did me. Like myself, he seemed to experience discomfort with the infiltration of the head. So I repeated the process and let him get used to it. After a while, he told me to go ahead. I started a slow rhythm  and carefully eased inch by inch into him until i was working 5 inches inside him. Without warning, he reversed the situation and put himself on top like I did. He started riding me. I was speechless but it felt so good when he slammed all the way down onto my dick taking all of it. He looked so sexy, I watched as his pecks vibrated and his ass jiggled moving up and down on me. He was so sexy I wanted to cry at the beauty I was beholding. His mouth was wide open and his eyes closed with his head tilted back moaning. He was enjoying this as much as I was. Once again we had another session with multiple positions until I was backshotting him. He creamed on my dick again throughout the experience. It felt so good, I knew I would climax soon.  He tried to run but I managed to pull him back every time. He said it was too intense and he couldn’t take much more, begging me to cum.

“What’s my name?”

“Derek”

“Wrong!” I violently pounded him.

“What’s my name?”

“I don’t know.” He cried.

“Yea you do,” I pounded harder, “what’s my name?”

“Supreme (moan) Overlord (moan) Towers,” he cried out in pleasure. With those words, 2 weeks of tension building erupted into the condom flooding it with life fluid. I came for a minute straight. I didn’t even know that was possible. The condom had the most cum I’ve ever seen in my life inside and I have know idea how all that fit in there. I looked down to see that Kevin came too. His sheets were soaked in his liquid release. There was so much I was sure he produced more than I did. We struggled to catch our breaths for bout five minutes. It was still raining and we took a shower together and had another make out session. We dried off and went to my room in our birthday suits. He spooned me and we had a long intense discussion even though it was now 3 in the morning.

“I wanted to do that for a long time,” he admitted.

“Why didn’t you?”

“I was afraid.”

“Of what? I’m your best friend.”

“I don’t know. I panicked that day you told me and the reason I freaked out is because I didn’t know how to react. I developed feelings for you and didn’t know how to express myself.”

“All these years and you wait until now to tell me. So what now?”

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..


Disclaimer: Persons in the images used are not necessarily as the story describes do not reflect their character or sexuality. They are a mere depiction of each character’s features. However if there is a problem, please write me and they will be replaced by similar entities

© I. Black 2017

The most expensive way ever to get the police involved.

My wife and I had a first floor condo in what had previously been a nice complex. Unfortunately, over time the couple who lived above us (hereafter designated AA for Angry Alcoholic and AAG for Angry, Alcoholic Girlfriend) began drinking heavily, or maybe they just got louder about their drinking. Nearly every night became a massive screaming match between them. They’d stay up until 2 AM shouting at each other at the top of their lungs, then one of them would put on music at top volume to drown out the other. Their taste in music wasn’t actually bad but when it’s 2 AM and my floor is vibrating, it’s a problem. Sometimes they’d even take their fight out into the parking lot, just to be sure all the neighbors were treated to a detailed explanation of who had cheated on who recently (both), and who was threatening to dump who and leave right now. (Neither of them ever actually left, they just went out to their car and threatened to, loudly.)

Then in the mornings he would “work on” his car in the car in the carport right outside our front door. As far as I can tell the all he did was sit there and rev the engine for (it seemed) hours on end. I have no idea when he slept, maybe while we were at work? We and other neighbors complained to the condo board, who issued a warning, which AA and AAG ignored. Eventually the condo board started fining them, but AA found a genius solution- just don’t pay the fine. All the condo board could do was, eventually, put a lien on AA’s condo, but that would only become a problem for him when he sold the place. Apparently, they couldn’t actually foreclose on him, or maybe they just didn’t want to go to the trouble.

Trying to talk to him directly was useless- if we managed to catch him during a rare moment of sobriety, he’d just kind of blow us off, but if we caught him while he was drunk, he’d get pretty threatening and was then even louder for a few days.

We even tried calling the police, but they weren’t really interested unless he actually crossed the line into a felony. They gave him a few warnings, which he also ignored. Maybe if he’d actually beaten me or one of my other neighbors up, they’d have done something, but none of us felt like getting into a fight to find out. Plus there was always the risk that the cops would arrest everybody involved in the fight on general principles, and none of us wanted an arrest record.

Eventually, my wife and I decided to sell our condo and move, for multiple reasons that definitely included AA and AAG. Because of the timing of our move, our realtor wound up actually showing the condo while we were home a couple of times, and we discovered that one of the potential buyers was a city police officer, her husband, and their 1-year old baby. (I guess their old place was too small now that they had a kid.)

Unfortunately, their offer was $3,500 below the top offer. After talking it over, we told our realtor to accept their offer anyway, and we’d just eat the loss. So AA and AAG had a cop move in directly below them.

I’m Facebook friends with a couple of our old neighbors, and in the six months since we moved, AA has been arrested multiple times, and had his car impounded at least once. Apparently he’s now trying to be quieter, but that only lasts until he gets drunk and then he’s screaming again, and his new downstairs neighbor has long ago had enough of his shit, and does not appreciate it if he wakes up her kid. And I guess she also doesn’t appreciate it if he shouts at her. He’s in an “obnoxious neighbor” war with a cop, and he’s losing badly. Hopefully soon he’ll wind up in jail for longer than a couple of days.

TRUE STORY–THIS HAPPENED ABOUT EIGHT YEARS AGO, BEFORE I WAS MARRIED.

I was pretty surprised when I ran into B at the Home Depot. It had been at least a year since I’d seen him–since just before his wedding. We’d met when I moved to the city about 5 years ago and we were living in the same apartments. We spotted each other running a couple of times and introduced ourselves when we ran into each other at the apartment gym. Soon, we were work out partners. Soon after that, we were grinding our hard cocks together in my apartment. We were both dating women and we never did anything too serious. B was a stud and usually liked being on top as we made out and explored each other’s bodies. He had an awesome ass that I loved holding onto as he’d grind into me. Once, when he showed up drunk late one night, he let me eat that awesome ass, but a general pattern emerged of us making out, stripping each other, and him pumping a load down my throat as I stroked my fat dick. We were a good match and had a lot of fun until he got married and moved to a different part of the city. Our last session had been hot. He was more tender than usual and seemed like he was really going to miss me. For the first time, he even swallowed my load. It was a memory I’d stroked to many times in the last year.

And now, here B was, with that amazing ass on full display, right in front of me at the Home Depot. When I said hi, he looked just as surprised as I was. He and his wife had bought a house that was right around the corner from the condo I’d moved into. Looked like fate wanted me and B to be neighbors again. As we talked, I could have sworn I saw his dick growing in his shorts. I have him my new address and told him to come by anytime as we parted ways.

I can’t say I was surprised when B showed up that afternoon, sweaty and shirtless from a run. He was barely in the door before he had pinned me to the wall and was kissing me passionately as he pressed his sweaty frame into me. He’d been working out in the last year and his body felt better than ever. As I moved my hands down to that incredible round ass, he let out a deep moan.

We worked out way to the couch and he laid on top of me, grinding his rock hard dick into me as he kissed and licked my knock. His passion was real and he told me he hadn’t been with a dude since the last time we were together. I reached down for his dick and immediately remembered how amazing his hard thick rod always felt as it exploded in my throat. But as I started to move take his dick out of his shorts and get it into my mouth, he resisted, holding me down and grinding into me harder and harder. and then everything changed. In one move, he rolled over so his face was against the back of my couch and I was grinding against his back, my own hard dick pressing into his beautiful ass. The harder I ground my dick into him, the more he moaned. He buried his own head in the couch pillows to stifle his moans, but his seeming submission was making me feel more aggressive than usual. I pulled him back by the hair and told him I liked hearing him moan like a bitch. That alone made him moan louder than ever as he backed his ass up against me and ground into my leaking dick.

I couldn’t believe my luck when he realized he’d reached down and lowered his pants to expose his smooth bubble butt. I matched him move for move and pulled my own shorts down just enough to free my raging 8" dick. As I ground my hard dick against his bare ass for the first time, I could feel the precum leaking out of me. He was like a bitch in heat as he pushed into me, moaning and talking shit about how good I felt. How much he’d missed me. How much he needed this.

As he fagged out beneath me, I knew I had to take advantage of the moment. I lined my slick cockhead up with his tight hole and pressed as he worked his ass back into me. He moaned and almost cried as I forced my thick head into his nearly virgin hole. It took a fair amount of pressure and a series of short hard strokes to get B fully impaled on my rod, but he was clearly loving having my raw dick inside him for the first time. He writhed and bucked beneath me as I began to fuck him in earnest. As hot as it was to hear him moan and cry out as I plowed his hole, I pressed his head into the couch pillows so my neighbors wouldn’t hear me fucking this stud in broad daylight.

With his body pressed into the back of the couch and his head in the pillows, he reached back to hold onto my ass as I railed him. As his ass loosened from the fucking, he began to really buck beneath me, fucking back into me in time with my increasingly brutal thrusts. As I felt myself getting close, he turned his head from the pillows and begged me not to cum inside me. But it was too late and I told him so. I told him I’d swallowed dozens of his loads and now it was his turn to take one of mine. and I knew he wanted it. He’d come here to get my load this time and I was going to give it to him. Despite his protests, he whispered yes over and over as I ravaged his hole and my orgasm built.

When I exploded inside him, pressing his body firmly into the couch, his upturned ass worked every bit of my load out of my pulsing cock as he moaned beneath me. The incessant clenching in his ass as I came made it clear he was cumming to. My married top had just taken my raw load in his ass and had cum from the experience.

Within two minutes, he was up with his shorts and shoes back on, ready to head out. As always, he took a cigarette (wife wouldn’t let him smoke) and kissed me passionately before he left. After that, I only ever saw B around the neighborhood and we seldom spoke. But the summer after this happened, I did see B and his very pregnant wife at a neighborhood festival. I thought I might be in for some public fun when he followed me to the bathroom, but he just wanted to give me a message. As we left the bathroom, we whispered to me that he’d knocked his wife up the same day he’d seen me last. He couldn’t stop thinking about what happened, but he had to stay away from me now that he was going to be a dad. I knew then and there that I could get back in that ass if I tried, but B was a quality dude and I decided to respect his wishes and stay away from him. While that was the last time B and I hooked up, I stroked so many loads on that couch, looking at the stain he left when he exploded from the fucking I’d delivered. One of the hottest of my top experiences.

i think part of the reason the balance campaign finale killed me so bad was that every canon queer person not only lived but prospered

like ive never seen that in any media before. usually there’s like 1-2 queer characters if you’re lucky, and they’re not main characters, and their storylines are either boring, don’t go anywhere, are way over-dramatic as to be “””realistic””” to the queer experience, and end in death/death of partner/being miserable in general

a story where there’s not only a gay main character who ends up in a happy and stable relationship and a happy trans woman in a ridiculously loving and long-term relationship, but every relationship on the show includes a queer person and they all end up happy and successful and thriving is UNHEARD OF to me. like i don’t think i ever thought that would happen in something created by a couple of cishet dudes??

as a queer person im used to wanting and hoping but not receiving. i’m used to thinking “god it would be amazing if these two characters got together” or “i wish these characters got more screen time but i guess im happy they exist at all” or “i wish the gay neighbors had actual plotlines and weren’t just a trope/a joke/a token” and im used to settling with whatever the cishet writers and directors and producers deign to give me but i’m not used to actually getting what i want.

as soon as magnus made carey that ring i went “god wouldn’t it be amazing if the campaign ended on their wedding?” the whole fandom made jokes about sloane and hurley coming back at the end bc they’re great characters and their deaths were heartbreaking to a lot of people. i thought about how cool it would be to see a taakitz kiss and them interacting more and being in love. i didn’t think any of this would actually happen

i’m not used to getting what i want in terms of queer rep but the emotional impact i’ve felt in the wake of this finale has shown me what creators can do when they really listen and care and do their research. no other media i’ve consumed has shown this level of commitment and care to not only making an excellent product the creators can be proud of, but something the audience can see themselves in and be proud of, too. and im just endlessly grateful for these doofuses for creating that

5

[IDOL AU]
At the other side of the gate is the most radiant star in galaxy

-Kinetic Abilities Prompt List B Edition

Benzinakinesis - Control Gases

  • Literally, if you take one step closer I’m filling your side of the room with helium.
  • Sadly, your parents perished in a freak hot air balloon accident. I have no idea what happened.
  • Popping all those lightbulbs by expanding th egass in them looked pretty sweet but now there’s glass everywhere…

Bibliokinesis - Control Books

  • I don’t know how you somehow got into my mega-library, but you’re not getting any of these books back. They belong to me now.
  • You may have flight but I can sit on this Britannica and get where I’m going just fine.
  • There’s a reason why there’s a demand for movies to be made into books. You’re looking at them.

Biokinesis - Control Bodies

  • Nothing says professional cryptid like camouflage, mutations, and death on demand. 
  • It’s like playing an Operation game whenever I try to help somebody. There’s no buzzer though, just them screaming when I accidentally rip a tendon.
  • Sometimes, you just want to make your shitty neighbor into a rat. 

Bio-thermokinesis - Control Body temperature

  • I can’t exactly make a trip to Antarctica feel like summer vacation, but I can make it more tolerable. 
  • No thermal cameras can ever see me. But maybe I should knock out the regular cameras too…
  • Giving someone hyperthermia in a room of ice is torture enough. Have them drown themselves to quench their thirst? Dastardly.

Blennokinesis - Control Filth

  • Don’t think for one minute I wan’t bring back the black death. That’s how serious I’m being.
  • When I removed all the polution, I didn’t think people would be so eagar to make more.
  • This blu cheese is barely aged. Let me spread this mold a little more and it’ll be fit for the party.

Botanokinesis - Control plants

  • The grass are all individuals who get as much voice as trees do. I’m drowning in voices and opinions. I need to make them quiet. 
  • That’s it. I’m making it so any thrown away plant matter gets to people who need it. No more of this ‘not enough’ stuff.
  • My best friend might be a potted plant, but at least they aren’t judgemental like you are.

Brontekinesis - Control thunder

  • I’ll vibrate you so hard your organs burst and don’t even think for one second I’m bluffing.
  • No, I don’t have electricity powers. Isn’t the sound wave part cool enough for you? 
  • I made all my minions deaf before you even arrived. I wanted them to have the upper hand when I make you deaf too.
Buzzfeed Unsolved Starters

“I don’t think you can exercise spiders.”
“Oh see, NOW you’re acting like a detective, and not a jackass!”
“‘Dan’ just sounds like your neighbor who wants to borrow your lawn mower.”
“Here, I drew a picture of you with 3 butt cheeks. This drawing now exists in the world.”
“Since when has a skull ever actually shrunk in history?”
“This thought you’re having right now is not very spontaneous.”
“Too much fire here. What do I look like, a fireman?”
 "Cool guy. Coolest guy in history. Nice sunglasses. Wow! Bourbon’s great.“   
“Is it very European to burst into flames?”
“Are basketball players aliens?”
“How do we know his suit is black if it’s in a black in white photo? Maybe it was really navy blue.”
“I’m good, I’ll just sign up for karate.”
“Stop holding the pen like that, you look like an asshole.”
“I went to 8 churches today to get some holy water and i couldn’t get any, so now im going into a demon hole with no holy water!!”
“I’m 99.9% sure he’s never cut anyone’s head of in is time as a dentist.”
“Why you gotta go jumping off planes?”
“I don’t need to set my mom on fire for freedom!”
 "This piece of evidence was found on a Wikipedia page, therefore making it complete Horseshit.“
 "He’s a big dumb-dumb floating in the sky with his stupid trench coat blowing in the wind.”
 "There may very well be a hot dog vendor in Chicago who is a Bigfoot.“

anonymous asked:

Any recent fics you read that you liked? And what about that bottom louis fic rec you promised? ;))

I will do the recent fic list because I have had some awesome fics to read in the last few days. Also, I am gonna limit it to 10 fics lest I get carried away. On to the fics!!


Like an Endless Summer by Anonymous

Louis is a riding instructor at a summer camp, and Harry is a fellow counselor who he’s been successfully managing his crush on for the last two summers. That is, until Harry shows up this year leveled up and lethal, and all Louis’s formerly perfected veneer of nonchalance melts like a Popsicle in the sun.

**This is delightful. An absolute treat!!


Or Brûlant by iris_avis (starryeyedlarry) (WIP) @iris-avis

After completing his prestigious dance training overseas, Harry returns to England to begin teaching in one of London’s elite ballet schools. Only, certain dancers aren’t too happy to have him suddenly on board. Or his well-fitted lycra uniform. Throw in some unusual dynamics, tense elevation demonstrations and an unlikely dance partnership, and you’ve got yourself a pretty interesting edition of Matthew Bourne’s ‘Swan Lake’.

Or the one where Harry is the new ballet teacher, despite him being younger than everyone in his class, and Louis is less than impressed by his inescapable talent. They sort themselves out eventually.

**I am in love with this fic. Listen, even if you don’t love ballet, you will love this.

 

cupid’s defence by rhuubarb  @rhuubarb

“Of course, the ONE time a ridiculously attractive man shows up at Louis’ home, butt naked, he turns out to be an arrogant love god. Not only that, but he’s an arrogant love god facing a multi-million pound lawsuit, possible banishment from Mount Olympus, and a shit ton of adjustment issues.”

Alternatively: Harry is Cupid, Louis and Liam own a law firm, and they’re all getting sued.

**HARRY CRIES GLITTER!! NEED I SAY MORE?!?! But in all seriousness, this fic is gold. Go read it!!


Carry This Feeling by Awriterwrites, dimpled_halo @dimpled-halo @a-writerwrites

Harry knows, objectively, that he shouldn’t try to get his ghostwriter into bed. He knows. But…he finds it hard to resist temptation when Louis waltzes into his home and his life and turns everything upside down. And, as it turns out, Louis might just need a little turning upside down too.

**This fic was a treat to read. Harry is a troubled soul and Louis helps him figure himself out.


under me, you by hazzafrazza (colberry) @colberry

You Won’t Believe Who Was Spotted Leaving Harry Styles’ Primrose Hill Pad!

If Harry was being completely honest, it probably wasn’t the best idea to be a world-renowned popstar and an infamous vigilante.

(Especially when all the comic books said never reveal your secret identity to keep your loved ones safe – which was all well and good, until Louis.)

Or: Harry wants a lot of things – fame, glory, Louis – but that last one is particularly hard to get when everyone thinks you’re dating your secret superhero alter-ego and suddenly you’ve become your own worst cockblock.

**This is fucking hilarious!! A very funny twist to your vigilante fics!!


Your Mess Is Mine by amory @amories

Louis is the father to the most brilliant little boy in the world who is all Louis really needs, or at least that’s what he tells himself. Harry is a gorgeous boybander fresh off a two year break and a massive scandal that’s left him a little broken and more than ready to move on.

They fall in love.

**I have been following this one since it had been a WIP. It is a good read.


Through Eerie Chaos by MediaWhore @mediawhorefics

For as long as anyone can remember, Old Hillsbridge Manor has always been believed to be haunted. Everyone in the village agrees and keeps a respectful, fearful, distance. New in town after a bad breakup and an internship that led to disappointment rather than a permanent job, Harry Styles figures taking pictures of the decrepit building could be a great new creative project. Or at least a much-needed distraction while he searches for a job and crashes at his parents’ new house. No one warned him about the apparitions though; about the music, the laughter, the people who flicker and vanish when you call after them, the echoes of a past that should be long gone… Harry has never believed in spirits but even he can admit that there’s something weird going on. What starts as mere curiosity evolves into a full-blown investigation and soon enough, Harry finds himself making friends with an aristocrat from the 1920s and struggling with finding the best way to tell him that he’s dead.

The Ghost Hunter AU where Niall lives to prove ghosts are real, Zayn is a skeptical librarian and Harry gets caught up in a century-old mystery and catches feeling in the process.

**This fic has probably been recced everywhere in every list as it should be. It is one of the most unique fics I have read. Also, the feels are real. Get ready to cry.


picture you staring by turnyourankle @floralhoran

If there’s one thing Louis won’t stand for it’s being replaced as his nieces’ favourite uncle.

Especially by some bloke they met barely hours into their holiday in Portugal who’s not even related to them.

**This is very short and very sweet!! Like super sweet!!!


Packed Lunches, Sticky Fingers and Accidental Levitation by LadyLondonderry @londonfoginacup

Harry Styles is a skilled work-from-home potionist five years out of university with a steady job, a house, and… eight kids.

He also might be heading towards a breakdown if he doesn’t get a bit of help.

Enter a meddling pixie and an old university friend he might or might not have had a lot of feelings for.

**This is the fluffiest fic I have read most recently. It is endearing with a very unique setting!! 


Runaway Land by daggerinrose (WIP)

Louis is sure he’s stumbled upon a secret, underground nightclub, though that is far from the truth. He’s also pretty sure he’s stumbled upon Apollo, which… isn’t very far from the truth, actually.

Modern Greek mythology AU

**Again, a very unique fic. It is quite intense, and thrilling. Go give it a read!!


All is fair in love and war by weddingbells @babygotstyles

The Nanny AU in which Louis is the sassy gay Nanny-by-accident taking care of the kids of movie director Harry Styles. Also there’s Liam as the butler, Niall as Louis’ best friend, Zayn as the model/actor and Nick as Harry’s partner from work that maybe wants a bit more from Harry than cooperation.

**This is hilarious, Also, Nick is a dick. So, you know, a warning…


That’s How I Know by allwaswell16  @allwaswell16

Louis Tomlinson has just landed his dream job, coaching soccer at Augustus University. When he moves into a new house near campus, he meets his very fit new neighbor, English professor Harry Styles. Although their first meeting leads to an instant mutual dislike, the more Harry gets to know Louis, the more he likes what he sees.

Or the one where Harry’s African grey parrot spills his dirty secrets to his very hot neighbor.

**This one was so good, guys. You will fall in love with Darcy, the parrot. And it got me looking into parrots and stuff. They are awesome!! But read this fic first!!! I am also quite curious about the writer. I really liked their writing style and would love to read more of their works!! 


The Fairy Ring by thedeathchamber @louehvolution

Harry has dreamed of a world outside the tiny village of Holmes Chapel for as long as he can remember… a world full of magic and adventure and true love.
It was nothing but a childhood dream, however, until an old family friend comes bearing word of a plot against Harry’s life and a very dangerous truth: Harry is the rightful heir to the crown and must embark on a perilous quest to reclaim his throne from the ruthless would-be King Simon.
But in the end Harry will find himself fighting for more than a crown, and on the verge of losing something much more precious than his sovereign power.
Because magic might be real, but life is not a fairy tale, and Harry is a prince up against a very big dragon.

Or: a medieval fantasy AU in which Harry is a prince in disguise and Louis is the king of the faeries.

**A fantasy au!! Very interesting read!!


The Sweetest Incantation by smittenwithlouis @smittenwithlouis

Harry has been alive for decades, and yet he’s never been as confused and dumbfounded. He’s a witch, for God’s sake. Can’t get much weirder than all the magical things he’s experienced throughout his lifetime. Never in a million years, however, would he have expected to be mere inches away from a hybrid.

Or: Harry is a witch who’s still working on developing his powers and Louis is a werecat who falls into his life and turns it upside down.

**I LOVED THIS FIC!!! I LOVED EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS FIC!! i WOULD GIVE MY LIFE FOR THIS FIC!! I mean, KittenHybrid!Louis, Witch!Harry, Matchmaker!Steve!!! What else do you need?!?! Go read this, right now!!

3

WW2 Veteran Comes out as Transgender aged 90

A WW2 veteran has come out as transgender at the age of 90 and is happy to finally be receiving female hormone treatment.

Patricia Davies says she knew since the age of three that she was a woman but lived in fear of how people would react for decades until doctors changed her medical records to “female” last year.

Even though she had opened up to her late wife about her feelings in 1987, who bought her jewelry and dresses to wear in secret, she remained living as Peter after receiving abuse from people in the street and fearing “electric shock treatment”.

The retired industrial photographer, who served in the army between April 1945-1948, has a distant aunt who once lived to 104 years old so hopes she has “similar genes” to keep her going so she can now enjoy life as a woman.

Patricia, from a village in Leicestershire, said: “It feels like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders. I was living a lie.”

“I have been keeping quiet. I have slowly started to tell some of my neighbors. Everybody said ‘don’t worry, as long as you’re happy.”

“I’ve known I was transgender since I was three-years-old.”

“I have always been attracted to women but not in a sexual way. I’m not gay. My attraction to women was that I wanted to be like them. I would have liked to be like the pin-ups.”

“I was never totally unhappy. I always made the most of things and looked on the bright side of things. I’ve always had a wicked sense of humor.”

“Because of the general hostility of people I kept quiet. It wasn’t until recently that I felt safe to come out and I felt an overwhelming desire that I wanted to break free. So I came out and I’ve not regretted it.”

Patricia served in the army from April 1945 until April 1948, leaving when she was 21 and getting married only a few months later.

During her time in the armed forces, she served in the Far East, India, East Africa and Palestine.

Patricia said: “You took your life in your hands in the army. I lost a couple of mates and had a close shave myself.”

“I had to keep my mouth shut about being transgender, you couldn’t flaunt that as that would have been a disaster.”

“Transgender wasn’t really known in those days. I would have been classed as homosexual, which would have caused problems in the army. I would have ended up in prison. But I got through it.”

“But it was alright overall and I feel quite proud having served during the war and having done military service, in particular during the trouble in Palestine.”

“Perhaps Hitler got news I had joined in April 1945 and gave up. That’s what I like to think.”

“I feel quite relieved, quite happy. [The best thing about coming out] is being accepted as a woman. That has been something I’ve wanted all of my life.”

“If people don’t like what they see then I don’t care but no one seems to be causing me any trouble. Nobody questions it though. Nobody seems to bat an eyelid, they accept me as I am.”

“I’ve been made most welcome in the societies. I think people will benefit from being educated on this a bit more.”

  • what she says: I'm fine
  • what she means: I want to know why they referenced Deadpool (2016) not one, but TWO times in Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017). First Liz and her friends are talking about what Spider-Man looks like under the mask like what if he's 30 years old? What if he has scarred skin? Um DEADPOOL. Then when Peter is running through the neighborhood and commenting on what the neighbors are doing and then showing ferris bueller on the tv and peter commented on it. May I remind you that they referenced ferris bueller in deadpool with deadpool in a robe talking to the camera in his hallway. Like what the hell like who's idea was to match them up like that? What are they planning ? Are they planning a crossover? Did Ryan Reynolds come to set ? Was Ryan Reynolds there to give them that idea? Does Tom Holland want the crossover ? WHOS IDEA WAS IT