i wanna do a million more of these

THE SIGNS AS LORDE LYRICS

Aries:  We gladiate but I guess we’re really fighting ourselves. Roughing up our minds so we’re ready when the kill time comes. Wide awake in bed, words in my brain, “Secretly you love this do you even wanna go free?” - “Glory And Gore”

Taurus:  We’re never done with killing time. Can I kill it with you, ‘til the veins run red and blue? We come around here all the time, got a lot to not do. Let me kill it with you. - “400 Lux”

Gemini:  Baby be the class clown, I’ll be the beauty queen in tears. It’s a new art form showing people how little we care. We’re so happy, even when we’re smiling out of fear. - “Tennis Court”

Cancer:  My mother’s love is choking me. I’m sick of words that hang above my head. What about the kid? It’s time the kid got free. - “The Love Club”

Leo:  There’s nothing I want but money and time, million dollar bills and a tick tick tick tick. There’s nothing more cruel than only nine lives, a limit in spite will do the trick trick trick trick. - “Million Dollar Bills”

Virgo:  Cola with the burnt-out taste. I’m the one you tell your fears to.
There’ll never be enough of us.
- “Buzzcut Season”

Libra:  Dancing around the lies we tell. Dancing around big eyes as well.
Even the comatose, they don’t dance and tell.
- “Team”

Scorpio:  This dream isn’t feeling sweet, we’re reeling through the midnight streets. And I’ve never felt more alone. It feels so scary getting old. - “Ribs”

Sagittarius:  Don’t you think that it’s boring how people talk, making smart with their words again, well I’m bored. Because I’m doing this for the thrill of it, killing it, never not chasing a million things I want. - “Tennis Court”

Capricorn:  All work and no play, let me count the bruises. All business all day, keeps me up a level. All work and no play, lonely on the new shit, yeah. - “Still Sane”

Aquarius:  Raise a glass, ‘cause I’m not done saying it. They all wanna get rough, get away with it. Let 'em talk 'cause we’re dancing in this world alone, world alone, we’re all alone. - “A World Alone”

Pisces:  You’re the only friend I need, sharing beds like little kids. And laughing 'til our ribs get tough, but that will never be enough. - “Ribs”

it’s already starting to get uncomfortably warm where I live, so here are some hot weather survival tips to help y’all keep looking effortlessly flawless even when your face feels like it’s melting off
  • You want sweatproof foundation? Add a primer and a setting spray to your makeup routine. e.l.f. has pretty decent ones for really great prices (the primer is like $3-5 depending on the store you go to, and the setting spray is like $3-7), and they’re cruelty-free!
  • You wanna wear a skirt/dress, but your thighs are all chafe-y? Rub some deodorant on the inside of your thighs to help eliminate friction. It may sound weird but it really does help.
  • If you live somewhere that has really humid summers, you can keep your hair from getting too crazy frizzy by using a serum (I use Designline’s Silk Drops, but that one’s a little pricey – OGX has a good one that’s way cheaper and smells like coconut). Squeeze a dime-sized amount into your hand, rub your fingers together, and run it through the length of your hair. If you want to go a step further, you can spray some hairspray into your hand, rub your hands together, and then run your hands over your hair to smooth it down. 
  • BB cream is generally lighter and less cake-y than foundation, and in hot weather it’s less likely to melt off. I haven’t found a good cruelty-free one that’s pale enough for me yet, but Maybelline has a decent one that I used to use.
  • Liquid eyeliner is sweatproof, and the really good ones are even pool-proof. You should also make sure your mascara is waterproof so it won’t run when you sweat.
  • DO NOT SHAVE EVERY DAY. Shaving too often will give you dry skin and razor burn, which is super uncomfortable. You should be shaving every 2-3 days AT THE MOST. Also, use conditioner instead of shaving cream (it’s cheaper and works way better) and apply lotion as soon as you finish shaving.
  • If you’re struggling with sweaty skin and summer acne, try using a face wash, scrub, or mask with activated charcoal in it. It sounds weird, but it really works and is gentle enough for sensitive skin.
  • If your face gets all shiny over the course of the day, you might want to look into getting some blotting sheets (or “oil-absorbing sheets,” as they’re sometimes labeled) to keep in your backpack or purse. You just pat them on your face, and they absorb all the extra oil and help you look more matte and less shiny. You don’t even have to buy special blotting sheets – I had a friend who made her own by just cutting some tissue paper into little squares, and they worked really well! 
  • Dry shampoo is a lifesaver, especially if your hair gets greasy and sweaty during the day. You can buy a cute lil bottle to keep in your purse, and use as needed throughout the day. 
  • Every March/April, Walmart starts selling cheap flip flops for like a dollar a pair. I highly recommend going and buying a pair or two, because it’s honestly never a bad idea to have some cheap flip flops on hand, especially if you go swimming a lot.
  • Coconut oil is your best friend. You can put it on your lips to keep them soft and plump, you can put it in your hair as a deep conditioning treatment, you can use it to soften dry, rough skin like on your elbows and the soles of your feet – just do whatever. You can also substitute it for vegetable oil when you bake cookies or brownies; it tastes better and is better for you. 10/10
  • If you’re insecure about wearing revealing clothing because you have scars/stretch marks/ect., Vitamin E oil is really great for helping them fade. I am very clumsy and scar very easily, and this stuff is a life saver. (And of course, scars and stretch marks are nothing to be ashamed of – I personally think stretch marks are extremely adorable and love mine a lot – but if yours make you uncomfortable you have every right to use a treatment like this to make them less noticeable.)
  • I know you’ve probably already heard this a million times, but YOU NEED TO DRINK WATER. ESPECIALLY WHEN IT’S HOT AND YOU’RE SWEATING. Trust me, dehydration and heat stroke are not fun, you do not wanna go there. Drink whenever you have the chance. And yes, it does have to be water. Soda literally just makes you more dehydrated.
  • If you’re going to go to the beach or pool, go in the late afternoon/evening (like 4:00 p.m. or later). It’ll be way, way less crowded, and the sun will already be starting to chill out, so you have way less of a chance of getting burned.
  • If you DO get sunburned, aloe vera gel can save the day. When I was fourteen I got a sunburn so bad that I couldn’t sleep (because my soft, silky sheets were hurting me when they rubbed my skin) and almost had permanent scarring. My friend brought me some of this stuff and not only did it provide instant pain relief, but my burns healed completely and didn’t scar! 
  • If you are out in the sun and start to feel dizzy, lightheaded, or nauseous, or if you develop a headache, get yourself to a cool, shady place (preferably inside an air-conditioned building) IMMEDIATELY. 
  • DON’T WEAR SANDALS TO A CONCERT, FESTIVAL, OR OTHER OUTDOORS EVENT. TRUST ME. YOUR FEET WILL GET SO DIRTY AND GROSS, IT’S NOT WORTH IT.
  • You can make a really good body scrub by combining sugar, olive oil or honey, and a few drops of lemon juice. You can use it to exfoliate your body or even your face, especially if your skin gets kind of rough during the summer. 
  • I probably sound like such a mom right now, but please don’t forget to sleep this summer. Teens and adults need AT LEAST eight hours a night to function normally, and lack of sleep can lead to heightened anxiety and lack of focus, and can even make you gain or retain weight.
  • Eating is important, too. I know I, for one, sometimes forget to feed myself if someone doesn’t remind me, but it’s important to make sure you’re getting 1200-1600 calories a day at the very least. And obviously you’ll need to eat more on days that you’re walking or exercising a lot, like if you go to a festival or on a hike.  

Mark; 

-he’d just sweetly giggle as you buried yourself into his arms, not wanting him to leave his spot beside you- 

“Babe, come on, we need to go to the grocery store. We need to get up.” 
*you’d shake your head in response, “I just wanna cuddle though.~”* 
“Ahh, my spoiled little girl.” 
“Okay, okay- I’ll just tell Yugyeom and Bambam to go instead.” 

Originally posted by jitonic

Jackson; 

-no matter what he was doing, he’d drop everything just to return your cuddliness- 

*holds you as tight as ever as he peppers sweet kisses all over your face*
“Ahh my precious little cuddle bug.~” 

Originally posted by bts-bap-trash

Youngjae; 

-he’d just be ecstatic to have you be so clingy and cuddly, he always adored having you be so dependent on him- 

“My sweet little princess-” 
*gives you millions of playful pecks*
“You should be like this more often, I love it so much.~”

Originally posted by youngjai

Bambam; 

-he’d instantly melt as you koala hug his back while he’d be making ramen- 

*burying your face into his back, “Bammie, let’s go lay down and cuddle.”* 
“Babe, the ramen will get soggy.” 
*giggles as he begins to furiously blush*
“Okay, okay- just let me turn off the stove and I’ll give you all the cuddles you want, princess.” 

Originally posted by dailybamx2

Yugyeom; 

-his shyness would immediately come through as you clung to him the instant he stepped through the door- 

“Hello to you too, babygirl.” 
*kisses your forehead* 
“I’m guessing you missed me?” 

Originally posted by nguyentuti

Jinyoung; 

-the instant you bear hugged him, he’d immediately begin to hug you back; protectively keeping you in his embrace as the two of you laid back onto your shared bed- 

“Why are you being so cuddly, babygirl?” 
*chuckles softly as you shrug, repeatedly kissing his toned chest*
“God I love having you with me like this princess..” 

Originally posted by kareverie

Jaebum; 

-as you clung to him while the two of you laid together, watching Harry Potter; you suddenly just turned him and peppered candied kisses along his jawline- 

*trailing his hand up and down your back he just smiled at how affectionate you were being*
“I love you so much, babygirl. You know that right?” 
“You’re my little koala.” 

Originally posted by imjaebumisdaddyasfuck

Don’t Be A Fool (Smut)

MASTERLIST

Request: Could you write something that has to do with laur coming to the show and neither y/n or Shawn knows about it so there’s a little argument? But ends with smut.

Word count: 3,090

A/N: I don’t hate Lauren. 

Don’t Be A Fool (Smut)  

“I wanna love you with the lights on, keep you up all night long” You sang along with the rest of the crowed.

Though, you’d been with Shawn to what seemed like a million of his shows, you never got tired of singing the words aloud.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Your ambition inspires me but why do you work so hard?

I love seeing my creativity come to light. I love working on my dreams and I’ll always aspire to achieve more.

I’ve lived a great lifestyle and I don’t ever wanna go back to my broke days, no way. I’m in too deep lol.

Plus, I don’t wanna reach 30, with no credentials, out here struggling because I wasted my good years doing nonsense, especially in this climate of hungry ruthless teenagers. We have 16 year olds creating apps and selling for millions or becoming creatives. The next generation are here and they aren’t playing.

Yes I’ve seen that post that encourages older ppl that their time is still coming by listing the greats who started later down in life, and I’m not saying that that can’t happen, but this is a new day, and if you have nothing to show for yourself and you’re 30+, people really aren’t trying to hear excuses when they can just go hire someone young and full of energy and ideas.

You got grown folks out here behaving like children and although it may seem cool now, no one respects someone who’s wasted their life away, but people love seeing those who turned their lives around!! So with that being said, we gotta utilise every second of everyday; read, educate, learn, train, grind, work, grow, build, network, exit the comfort zone, think outside of the box.. or get stuck or left behind.

And that is definitely not my portion.

archiveofourown.org
A Flower In Autumn - Chapter 12 - enigmaticagentscully - The 100 (TV) [Archive of Our Own]
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
By Organization for Transformative Works

(A.K.A. The Terrible Melodramatic Kabby Regency Romance AU You Never Knew You Needed Until Now)

Chapter Twelve - ‘The Duel’

“There’s been a change of plan,” he said, trying without much success to conceal his laboured breathing.

Blake scowled, his recent palpable fear replaced now by belligerence, perhaps due to being faced by his foe. “I don’t care what Miss Griffin has said, I will not—”

“I will be taking your place in this duel,” cut in Marcus calmly. “If you would hand me your pistol; I see Mr Lincoln has already chosen his.”

[Read Here On AO3]

Aftermath•Shawn Mendes

Originally posted by shawnthecutest

MASTERLIST: Come and check out some of my other mildly average writing!


He’s in a hotel room in the middle of Seattle.

He should be sleeping; he’s got to travel to Oakland tomorrow and he knows - knows he’ll be restless. But he can’t. Shawn can’t sleep; his brain is far too busy to shut off for the night. It’s littered with melodies, schedules and her.

Its cliché – pathetic, really, how she can have such a magnetic hold on him from across the world. Well, she is only in Canada – but that’s not the point.

The point is Shawn can’t sleep because he can still taste her on his lips, can still hear her daring words – show me then – and the embarrassed smile that fell upon her face when she pulled away.

At first he was worried that he had ruined it all. Yet she had grinned, covered her face – giggled with glee and hugged him, pulled him into her wanting arms and brushed her lips against his ear ‘You have no idea how long I’ve waited for that’

Oh, Shawn knew. ‘Try me, babe’

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

I have a legit question for you. I don't mean this in a hateful or negative way I just really want to know your opinion on this. Since in the american military you can not enlist if you have any type of diabetes or any form of mental illness. So why are people so outraged that trans people who experience higher rates of mental health issues can't enlist? Again I'm not trying to spread hate I just want to know what your opinion is on this and maybe help me understand.

ok so…i don’t wanna start a debate so this’ll probably be the only other message i answer concerning this, but there’s like a million things wrong with that logic. i’m just gonna tell you right now that absolutely no one is thinking by that logic, and doing so is just providing thinly veiled transphobia trying to justify the seizure of trans people’s rights. (not accusing you of being transphobic, but that’s just the way it comes across. it’s grasping at straws, honestly.)

Keep reading

The drunk history of Fall Out Boy. By Brendon Urie

It’s summer of 2001; Joe meets Patrick and he’s like “Yo, I know about music.” and Patrick’s like “Yo, I know more about music” “That’s impossible. Do you wanna start a band?” And Patrick’s like “…Yeah… That’s cool.” And then he’s like “Yo, this is a book store, it’s not a music store!”

And then they met at Patrick’s house. And Patrick’s wearing shorts and socks and a hat. Patrick is playin’ drums for some fuckin’ reason! And Pete’s there, for some reason! They start playin’ music together. And they’re like “Oh, let’s play some fuckin’ covers from some other bands!” It was like, Green Day and fuckin’ Misfits and fuckin’ Ramones! Pete said to Joe “Yo, we gotta change this shit up! Yo, we’ve played all these bands; let’s play shit from Fall Out Boy.” And so Pete and Patrick are like “Yo, that’s dope. But we need a fuckin’ drummer!” Because Patrick’s playin’ drums and he’s a singer! Patrick’s like “Yo! I got a soul voice!” And they’re like “Wait, how do you have a soul voice!?!” And he’s like “Yo, watch this! Yeah!” and they’re like “Oh my god! That sounds like soul!” So they put it in the song and it was like “WHERE IS YOUR BOY TONIGHT!”

And then they’re like: “Yo, this is fuckin’ perfect. This is Fall Out Boy.” And they made records like, Evening Out With Your Ex-Girlfriend. Evening Out With Your Ex-Girlfriend, everybody loves it.
-It’s called: Evening Out With Your Girlfriend.
-With Your Ex-Girlfriend! It’s called Evening Out With Your Ex-Girlfriend! It’s called Eating Out Your Girlfriend, and it’s real and it doesn’t matter. And Pete talked to Patrick and Joe and he was like “Yo, what the fuck! Yo, this is gonna be fuckin’ dope!” So they made a record, and it was called: Take This To Your Grave. They made it without a drummer! And they had like three, four drummers come in. The four drummers they had come in were like: Josh Freese, Neil Peart, the dude from Toto… The fourth one was like the guy from Papa Roach or something. And they were like, “Yo, we need Andy Hurley. Andy Hurley. Take this to your grave. Fuckin’ record it.” And he did it, and he killed it. He was like,Bigadigadigalalululapssshhhh! Killing the skins! Tapping the skins! Tapping the rims! Playing the shit! Killing these bitches! Wrapping it out!
(You’re getting a fucking tattoo right now! What the fuck is going on?!)
“We should get signed, to Fueled by Ramen. ‘Cause these guys know what the fuck is going on.” And they were like “Yo, if you can make our scene any bigger than it is, which is not fuckin’ hard. We will sign you guys.” Pete was like ”Yo! We got this record that’s fuckin’ dope dude! It’s called Take This To Your Grave.“ Hey, it’s gonna be called From Under The Cork Tree, it’s gonna be fuckin’ huge. And then Patrick’s like “I gotta keep it real, I gotta keep it artistic. These are three songs that are gonna make the album and it’s called (burp), this is called: Thanks for the Memories, 20 Dollar Nosebleed, and Sugar We’re Going Down..” And they made this record that was fucking dope and it fucking hit on the charts.
Like: one, two, three! Three, two one! Three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten! TEN TO ONE! From Under The Cork Tree sold like, four million records! Ten million records! Fifteen million records! And Brendon Urie had nothing to do with the entire record. And Patrick was like “That’s good!” Pete was like “Yo, fuck you! I can do whatever I want!” Joe was like “Yeah, it’s cool man, whatever… I don’t give a shit.” And then Andy was like “Eh… Cool!” And Pete was like "Makeup is fuckin’ great for a guy. Because it makes a guy look beautiful. Which a lot of times, a guy is not beautiful. And I wanna change that.I wanna make sure everybody thinks that guys are beautiful.”

(-I’m good so far.
-You wanna spit one more time?
-Yeah, I do.
…Shut the fuck!..)

Pete was like “Oh my god, I’m so embarrassed about this dick pic!” And then I saw the dick pic, and I was like “Eh, it’s not bad. It’s not a bad dick. Let’s be real.” We made Rolling Stone one issue before Fall Out Boy. And Fall Out Boy made the issue right after us and they were so pissed! They were like “Yo, fuck you guys!” They were like “Yo! Panic has the fucking cover of Rolling Stone!?! Yo, fuck these dudes, we’re gonna fucking go miles above! We’re gonna hit every fucking continent there is known to man!” But they didn’t! Because they missed a second of time. Apparently, they were like: “Oh, shit we got every continent.” And they didn’t actually hit it. Dude, Pete was like “What the fuck!” Oh, you didn’t fuckin’ make the continent. It’s like, fuck you!

So From Under The Cork Tree happens, we fuckin’ have three, four years of awesomeness! Like people are cumming on themselves, 'cause it’s so big! So Fall Out Boy was like, so Patrick’s like “Yo, we’re gonna name this record 'From Under The Cork Tree’ and From Infinity On High.” Pete was like “Yo, Folie à Deux means, the Theatric of Two.” Fall Out Boy was like “Yo, we gotta take a break” meaning, Pete was like “Yo, we gotta take a break bro” and Patrick’s like, “I need time for my music! Uhhh!” And Joe’s like “Yo, I need time to find the fuckin’ art dude I gotta find some fuckin’ meau-metal.” And Andy’s like “I’m just gonna play with some fuckin’ metal bands.”

And they were like, “Alright, this breaks been like three years long. Two years long. Three years long. Three and a half? We gotta fuckin’ come back man. We gotta come back STRONG!
(-You took my beer away, what the fuck?!
-No, you poured it all over yourself!
-Yeah, you poured it on yourself, man.)
We gotta make this shit legit. It’s gonna be fuckin’ dope. It’s gonna go fuckin’ sky high. We’re gonna make a fuckin’ record that sails the skies. We’re gonna call this record: "Save Rock And Roll."” So they made Alone Together, Light 'Em Up, Alone Together, Phoenix. And everyone’s like “What the fuck? You’re working with this guy who fuckin’ recorded Avril Lavigne and P!nk!”
(-What the fuck is this on my shirt, did I puke on my shirt?
-No, you poured beer all over yourself!
-Oh god…)
Pete was like: “Yo, were gonna end up on the tour with Panic! At The Disco and Twenty Pilots.” (Burp, spit) And that’s all. And that’s all that matters. And that is how the fucking story goes.

The Same.

-Junhoe x Reader

-When Junhoe agrees to babysit his niece, he would never in a million years expect the little tyke to turn his life upside down in the most unexpected way possible.

-Fluff

-I notice there isn’t too many writing of iKon maknae line out. I really wanna change that because all 7 of them are so awesome. I don’t wanna get stuck on just doubleB, which I do notice most of my writing is for them. I hope to put out more of the other boys.

Originally posted by junhwe-koo


“Hello” 

“H-Hello?” The shaky voice spewing out from the speaker of your phone had your entire apartment halts in movement. It can’t be… Couldn’t be…

“Y/n?” Then it speaks up again, clearer this time, not a trace of hesitation in the way it so velvety wrapping your name in its soft tone. It was as though God had temporarily pressed pause on the movie that is your life. The TV was still blaring but falling on your deaf ears. The air sullen, sinking fast as cold wind rushing in from the seemingly warm spring day outside. Everything took on such a solemn note, almost peaceful. Your dog, Mattias, had stopped squirming around on the carpet, instead laying there with his legs up in the air gazing at you with inquisitive eyes. He must’ve heard it too.

“Jun..Junhoe?” You’re scare to speak up, to confirm that it is what you and your handsome boy, who was now moving on to licking his paws on the floor, heard.

“Yea, it’s me.” There it was again. Your brain still couldn’t register the familiar sound as anything but hallucination. It can’t be. You distinctively heard that annoying ringtone that you for the millionth time made a mental note to change but probably won’t.

“Uhm… Did you- I mean, hi.” Stuttering like a fool, you shut your eyes and grit your teeth in embarrassment even though he wasn’t there to see. The poor couch that had once hosted the owner of that voice during his many lazy day during his game session nearly break from you throwing your whole weight onto it out of utter mortification.

“Hi… I-I. I’m so sorry, Y/n. You know I wouldn’t call unless it was really dire.”

“It’s alright. What’s wrong?” 

It was so strange to hear him speak with no hidden sadness, not even a trace of bitterness lace in the soothing voice. For so long you had longed for him to sound out your name in the amicableness from before. Not the before of the weeks leading up to the painful break up. The before of playfully throwing veggies at each other while dinner bubbles away on the hot stove. Back when you cracking up in ribs splitting laughter whenever he does something completely stupid during your annual Y/n + Junhoe grand adventure. In those days where you could confidently claim you had him begging for in between lustful moans of the night. In the days where you were still his girlfriend. 

“I’m really panicking right now. Hani, my niece, I’m suppose to babysit her today and… God, Y/n. I don’t know what to do. I tried everything. I even freaking threaten to take her home if she don’t stop. I don’t know what else to do- I. Why did you made it look so easy when you babysat her. What do I do?” His voice wavers worse than a baby tree in a category 1 hurricane. He rans without even breathing and judging his heavy breaths, he must be really desperate.

“Slow down, Junhoe. Breathe. Listen to me. Breathe! It won’t do neither of you good if you pass out. Now, slowly, tell me what happened.” A few long breath could be heard huffing into the receiver end of his phone before a long sigh follows up with dead silent. You lean back in your chair, discomfort forcing its way out from how strange this all feel. 6 months, 6 months of nothing since the break up. He didn’t even grace you with the tiniest bit of salvation for your  aching heart even after you saw him arm in arm with the gorgeous cheery brunette that practically bounce her way down the busy street. 

“It started out so nice. We went to the park, we played, we watched movies. Then all of the sudden she won’t eat, she won’t play, she won’t listen to me. She just sat there and sulk. Then she threw a fit and spilled her lunch all over herself. I got irritated and she cry and now I wanna cry to and now she’s- She’s mad at me and I’m mad at her now too… and then…” The passion in his words dies out leaving you on the edge of your seat, anticipation coursing through your mind with all the worst scenarios. Above it all, why did he just call his girl. Why you.

“And then?” You whisper gently, careful not to shook anymore stress on the man that must be tearing his hair out by now.

“And then she, uh, she asked for you. She told me that it was all my fault you never come around anymore. You would know what she wants and all I do is just mess everything up. She’s crying so much that I don’t know what to do anymore, Y/n.”  The softness in his voice falters with the last syllable of your name. The before of sadness feigning its joyful counterpart of the break up week suddenly flood your mind with its present.

“I’m so sorry, Junhoe. I tried to explain to her that I had to leave…” You had always felt guilty for leaving everything in this wonderful part of your life you shared with him. Most of all, you felt the guilt of ruining the ultimate trust he gave you when he introduced his wonderful family to you.

“It’s not your fault. Kids, they just don’t understand breakups you know.” You cringe at the way the cursed word rolled off his tongue. Breakups. It’s such an ugly word to be tainting such a beautiful man with a kind heart and loving soul.

“Yea… I’m still sorry… for everything.”

“Thank you”

You both stay silent for how long, you didn’t really know. No doubts the rush of reminiscing, of running through all the wonderful memories you both made together also affected him because you could’ve sworn you heard that infectious chuckle of his. Somehow, somehow that made you smile even under all the tear you were shedding. 

“Did you want me to calm her down?” Deciding the silent was deafening enough, you speak up to clear the air. “Junnie? you there?” 

“uh, uhm, yea.” He cleared his throat, not a question in your mind that he caught himself on the endearing nickname you had always used. You on the other hand, hadn’t even caught it yourself. “Can I bring her over to your place? You still live in the same place right?”

“Yea, of course. You sure you don’t want me to come over there instead, easier?” You muse over his strange request seeing how it was much easier for one adult to make a trip rather than a 5 years old and a man child.

“I- I’m moving. Most my stuffs is already packed up so I figured it’d be easier over at a place with real household items.”

“Oh, I see. Why didn’t you just call your sister? Or your mom?”

“They’ve been so stress so I agree to help out… I don’t wanna be useless. I’m sorry.”

“Hey, don’t worry about it. Just come over, you know your way. See you soon.”

“See you!”


30 minutes. 30 minutes it took you to realize what you had just agreed to. 30 minutes to realize the man you’re still hopelessly in love with that was no longer hopelessly in love with you was driving over with his 5 years old niece. 30 freaking minutes to realize you look like shit and your apartment even worse. 

“Shit. Why did I do this to myself” was the last thing you could utter before huffing away to a hot shower and a quick 10 minutes hair make up session. Praise the lord for the walk in closet because your mess of a room had just cleaned itself in the 2 revolution the long hand of the clock took. You had just thrown all the windows open when that familiar ding dong yanks your attention toward that white door. Your heart drums with all its might knowing just who stands just beyond that piece of wood. Nerve wrecks every cell in your body as you reach out to the cold piece of metal keeping you away from him. 

“Hey! Oh my God, Hani! Come here you little monkey!” 

“Auntie!!! YAY!” 

No sooner than the door slam into the wall with all the might a 5 years old could exerts, she was already in your arm clinging on like the monkey she is. 

“You’re so heavy now. I don’t think I can carry you anymore… Oh no, I’m gonna drop you!”

Loud shrieks tearing through the house luring a very exciting doggie charging toward the familiar laugh of the five years old. They were best buddies, inseparable since Hani was barely walking and Mattias was barely learning how to properly use his tiny puppy paws.

“MATTY!” She yelps for you to let go before the two of them dance happily in circle, whizzing away to your bedroom. Silent sinking over the warming apartment once again as you eye an awkward Junhoe standing there juggling with what you presume is Hani’s luggages. 

“Hey you!” You headed for a hug before crash and burn into that invisible wall of boundaries. Were your hugs still welcome? Would it makes him feel odd being pull into the arms of his ex?

“Hey. Sorry for barging in. I, you know I wouldn’t bother you unless I really needed to.” Tottering over, you couldn’t help but wince at the way his eyes tracing out the metal edges of your lock box, for certain recalling the many times exhilaration ran through his fingers as he type in the code to your place.

“Yea, it’s no problem. I miss her. Come on in…”

He shuffles in, shucking off his shoes and placing them where he had always for the past 3 years you had occupied this quaint apartment. You remember the day when you both finished putting the place together. He had so specifically left an empty spot just on the bottom shelf of your shoe rack. You tilted your head in confusion, wondering what his reasoning was. To which he simply said “What? I gotta leave my shoes somewhere…”. Needless to say it jolted his heart to see the spot remains empty. Staring about now, he’s drinking in as much of this familiar yet strange space that was once 2nd home.

“The lock… It’s the same code. I saw you staring.”

“Oh” A nervous chuckles adores you with its crisp sound. “I see.” 

“How’ve you been? how’s the girlfriend?” Bitter is all you can taste saying that word.

“I’m good. No girlfriend… You?” Bitter is all he could taste thinking about another man touching you.

“I’m okay… No boys, just Mattias over there. I saw you with that girl…” You feel disgusted with yourself for even prying so hard but you needed to know. You just want to feel that security of having him to yourself.

“Oh, just a friend. We were actually lost, the whole group got separated and yea, we didn’t wanna lose each other too. She’s not from around here and getting lost would be a big problem.” Your heart grin from hearing the perfectly logical explanation of why she was clinging onto him so tightly.

“Ah, I see.” he sways around a bit, awkwardly smiling at you.

“Should I give the little one a shower? You said she spilled lunch all over herself…” This was strange. Way to strange for your liking. There stand the man you had seen countless time trekking across this place butt naked with a bottle of water in his hand. Yet here he was, acting like he just entered a stranger’s home. It hurts.

“Yes, thank you. You know I was never good with this… you did most of it. I don’t know what I was thinking accepting to babysit.” Your voice cut his trance short as his soul nearly leaving his body. Holding out the two backpacks full of stuff, he smile awkwardly, not really sure where the lines were being drawn.

“It’s no problem. Just, you know where everything is… I’ll be back.”

He watches as you disappear into that room, that sacred place of love, of lust, and of the life he misses so dearly. He’s scare, terrify in fact to peer through the door once again fearing he might find things he wouldn’t like. Things that remind him you’ve moved on. So he settles on the couch, listening to the loud giggles emanating from the bathroom. The golden rays dance on his skin just the same as it had many afternoons before watching you cook from this very couch. As if sensing his memory lane, Mattias had taken upon himself to crawl right next to his other master that he loves so much but haven’t seen in a long time. If he could speak, you were sure the pup would throw an even bigger fit than Hani.

“Auntie can we go get ice cream later?” The little tyke hopping excitingly in one place, sprinkling little droplets of water all over your floor.

“Yes, if you eat lunch and take a nap and listen to your uncle.” Wrapping her in a big towel, you dried her off before pulling on the small PJ with bunnies print you had gotten for her birthday not too long ago.

“Okay. I feel bad for making uncle sad. I didn’t mean to cry but I miss you. Uncle wouldn’t let me call you so I cried.” Her eyes reddening from the overrunning guilt. You couldn’t help but feel your heart cracking a bit further knowing this was half your fault. You knew you had to cut off all contact for Junhoe’s sake, for your sake. Never once during the breakup did you both consider the collateral damage and casualties you’d both leave in the wake of the separation. 

“It’s okay. He thought I was busy so he said that. Next time, how about I call you first??” You coo, pulling the sadden girl into your arms.

“Yea! I miss Matty too.” 

“We can take him to the doggie park later too. If your uncle says okay.” You force a smile for the kid but deep down, this was all too close to heart for your own comfort.

“Auntie… I know you and uncle doesn’t love each other anymore. It’s okay if you don’t want to see me. I just miss you, he misses you too. We just wanna see you. I know it makes you sad to see uncle. He’s very sad too. I saw him crying when he saw me looking at your pictures on the computer.” You were in the process of getting lunch ready but now, now you found yourself standing there like a statue being rain on. You hadn’t cry about Junhoe in so long. You thought you couldn’t anymore but little Hani’s honest words… They cut deep. So instead, you drop to your knee and let the little one hold you close, petting your hair as you shed your tear.

“Hani, I love you uncle very much. I miss him too. It’s just sometimes, sometimes adults have to do things they don’t like for the people they love. Sometimes we have to say goodbye but that doesn’t mean we don’t love each other. Doesn’t mean I don’t wanna see you. I wanna see you everyday. Matty wanna see you everyday. Next time just tell your uncle to call me, okay?” You smile to calm the little one down.

“You swear?”

“Pinky swear. Now let’s get you lunch and nap.”

Hand in hand, you both turn to walk toward the bedroom door when you could’ve sworn you just miss the blur of the tousle of black hair rushing away from the door. Pushing it to your weary mind playing trick, you both skip happily to lunch time. 

Your kitchen hadn’t had this much laughter since, well since before the breakup. Lunch came and go in a flash and you were now tucking the little one tightly under your blanket. She smile cheekily before planting a big kiss on your cheeks, whispering sleepily to not tell her uncle. 

Sauntering back to the living room now, you wonder where the dog and his master had gone in the 2 hours it took for Hani to finally tuckered out. You let our eyes wander not even a minute when they land upon the sweet sight of Junhoe’s large body cuddling up a sprawl out Mattias. The dog had him whipped since the first day you both adopted him from the rescue. Always napping together, could never got himself to put the four legged son in time out. Junhoe tightly shut eyes wincing a bit when Mattias stretches himself, kicking and whining in his dream. This is the sight you had always come to associate this place with, your life with. Who would’ve thought in such a short time, you’d lose all the hope and dream of a fun filled future with the sleepy man before you. Settling down just beside the boys on the floor, you reach out to scratch Mattias’s belly before hovering above Junhoe’s dark locks. He loves getting a good scalp massage to fall asleep to and you honestly love giving him one. You stare for a moment before the sinful lull of selfishness taken over. Dropping your fingers onto his fringe, you sweep the soft strands out of his forehead, lingering on his soft skin, basking in the cologne that still remains the same after 6 years of being together.

You could feel his eyes stirring a bit, life returning to his sleepy gaze as you shoot away toward the kitchen.

“Hey, where’s Hani?”

Damn that husky voice. Junhoe possesses the voice of angels, so delightful and sweet. When he sings, you could feel your heart skip several beats from how beautiful he is. But then there was the gruff in his voice when he just waking up, so low and so rough that it got you lost in him.

“She’s sleeping, probably 10 minutes now. You want lunch? I can reheat some stuff for you…” You avert your gaze, hand wiping the same spot for the 5th time in the past few minutes.

“I’m okay.” You could see him glancing around, taking note of the changes with a few nods of his head. “Everything is pretty much the same here…”

“Not everything. Lots of things changed.” You rush out the answer, hoping he hadn’t heard it.

“Yea it is. You extensive mug collection is still on the cabinet that’s way too high for you to reach. The bowls and plates still in the left bottom cabinet. You even organize your fridge in the same way. Matty’s bed is still in the corner next to the sliding door. I haven’t seen your room yet but I’m sure it’s the same.” He lists with a slight chuckle with all the intention in the world to lighten to mood.

“I moved the utensil drawer. It’s above the bowls and plates now. Made more sense that way. You grab your utensils then you grab your food holders. I don’t leave my water in the fridge door anymore, I got a big water cooler now. Easier that way.” You were feeling your tear creeping up on you, wiping that spot for the 10th time. “I can’t cook dinner for two anymore. It took me 3 months to even remember not to buy two serving of everything. Veggies don’t fly in the kitchen anymore, they’re just boring old veggies that lay around where you put them down. I don’t come home to your voice singing out my name anymore. I can’t jump into your arm. I can’t kiss you. I can’t cuddle you on rainy day. You don’t make me tea anymore. They’re all still there you know. You never took your tea collection when you left. I-I can’t go to bed expecting the sheet and cover already warmed up. I don’t have to complain about you leaving your products all over the bathroom sink. I guess that’s one good thing. I can’t take care of you when you’re sick and gross and icky. I don’t travel anymore. I don’t go get a salt and butter donut then a coffee every Sunday morning anymore. I’m not yours… And I can’t call you mine… So please tell me, Junnie, in what world is everything “the same””. 

You spin around briskly, throwing the towel onto the floor throwing your hands up in an air quotation mark in snide. You can’t bother hiding the tear anymore. All your emotion of 6 months of constant suppressing exploded. He stood there wide eyes but already lunging forward to pull you into his chest. 

“Damn it, Junhoe. Why did we even break up in the first place?” You sob into his chest feeling the knots in your hair loosen with each pass of his fingers. You feel all the frustration of going against the grain of life seeping out.

“Because we weren’t going anywhere… remember? We got stuck in this routine life that was just stomping in one place. I was struggling to move up in the world and you, you weren’t getting any warmer with the idea of settling down and getting marry. But I have a feeling you’re not asking for the reason…” He coos so tenderly the painful reminder of why you were sleeping alone every night.

“No… Why did it all seemed so complicated back then…Why did we agree to this shitty lonely life.” Your arms tighten around his body, squeezing out all the darkness as he chuckles.

“Because we were dumb and young.”

“We’re still the same age now as when we parted you freak!” He laughs at the seemingly ease you could crack a comeback even when you’re ugly crying.

“Fine. Because we’re a bit wiser now than we were before. We’ve been together for so long and I think we just needed a reminder of what it feels like to be on our own. Honestly, I hated every single second of the past 6 months. I knew it was mutual and I have no right but God, I got so angry when I saw your Instagram that you were getting tea with that guy from your work. Tea is my thing. You were only suppose to drink the one I pick. Then I laughed because there I was, getting angry over tea. But you know what? I realized i miss you so damn much.”

You nearly choke on that sentence. You wanted so badly to come home to that sentence but you couldn’t bring yourself to ask for it. Not when you both decided to part way. His lips find themselves resting on your damp cheek as he whispers “i miss you” over and over until you dug your face so far into the crook of his neck the kisses couldn’t reach you anymore.

“I knew I said we always do the same thing and it got so abhorrently boring but I miss it. I would sell my soul to have those “boring” date back. I knew it was just a fluke this morning when you called me Junnie over the phone but it had my heart doing flips and my stomach sick with butterflies. Then earlier when you told Hani you miss me, I’m surprise I had enough self control not to kiss your lips off then and there.” 

You sob out a laugh from the sweet words of your sassy man and he returns the same. You both stood there for so long just looking at the familiarities of each other and how they’re all suddenly seems to be glowing with all the lights of the stars above. His hands move to cup your cheeks gingerly to which you respond with the flutter shut of your eyes. Then you feel the intense heat of summer spreading from his soft lips. It breaches the barrier with the thrust of his tongue greeting yours. It burns down your throat as he moans into you, satisfies with your welcoming touches. Searing down your chest, your heart works itself into a stupor, drugging all your veins with love as you clutch onto the fabric of his shirt, pulling him closer. Finally your spent lungs gave out from the intensity of its all with a heavy pant.

“Please tell me we’ll get back together after this because if not, this would all be soooo embarrassing. Also, I’d really like it if you help me move. It’s been hell doing it myself.” He retorts, eyes gloss over with every drip of love he could offer despite the cheeky remarks.

“Yes, weirdo. I mean, who’s gonna fill that empty spot on my shoe rack. I guess I should also pay you back for moving me into this place.” a soft thud of your fist playfully tickles his chest as a much crisper laugh tears through your apartment. You didn’t wanna leave his arms and it seems he has no problem with it. You stay there in the kitchen that held so much memory and surely host of new ones. Your arms tight around him as you rest on his strong stature. He presses kisses here and there, relaying how much he needs you close. Once the tiredness settled into your legs, you drag him over to the couch surprising a still sleeping Mattias awake. He gladly gives up part of the couch for you to fall onto with Junhoe flushing tight against your back.

“You know earlier, when you were struggling with 2 backpacks and a fussy Hani, you really looked like a real dad. Kinda cute.” 

“Yea? Does it uh, does it makes you feel a certain way…?” He winks teasingly, words playful as he presses a kiss onto your lips.

“I don’t know. Should I be? Why don’t you enlighten me.” You refuse to relent to his mischievous words.

“If I look like a dad and you think it’s cute… Doesn’t it incite a motherly feeling in you? I mean, you look like a fearless mom that could handle a zombie apocalypse earlier laying down the law with Hani. I’m not saying you have to feel motherly any time soon… Just you know, eventually.” Hope glints gleefully in his eyes as he not so inconspicuously letting his finger rubs your own very specific one.

“Koo Junhoe, isn’t there something you need to ask me first before I should be feeling motherly?” You retort, flicking his forehead, watching him wincing in pain.

“Let me worry about that part, okay babe? I promise you, I’ll be here for the rest of your life. I will never, ever leave again.” Clutching onto your hands tightly, he let his heart speaks knowing he’s in a good place from here on out.

“I love you, Junnie.”

“I love you, baby.”

You both remain silent, basking in the peacefulness of a revived love. You spend your time staring at him, letting your fingers relearn all the dips and curve of Junhoe. He did the same, index running along your nose ridge, brushing your hair out of your face, poking your cheeks. Nothing but small giggles and kisses could be heard for the next hour until the gentle voice of a very sleepy Hani burst your bubble.

“Does this mean I get to sleep over whenever I want to again?”

Junhoe breaks into a laugh as you motion for the little one to come over. She jumps right in and wiggles herself neatly in the crack between yours and his body. She calls for Mattias as the happy pup wagging his tail your way, settling just beneath your feet continuing to snooze away. Her eyes close once again as you press a soft kiss on her hair, Junhoe doing the same.  He whispers to a giddy Hani before beaming brightly at you.

“Yes, kid. It does.” 

the drunk history video is one of the best things to exist

It’s summer of 2001; Joe meets Patrick and he’s like “Yo, I know about music.” and Patrick’s like “Yo, I know more about music” “That’s impossible. Do you wanna start a band?” And Patrick’s like “…Yeah… That’s cool.” And then he’s like “Yo, this is a book store, it’s not a music store!”
And then they met at Patrick’s house. And Patrick’s wearing shorts and socks and a hat. Patrick is playin’ drums for some fuckin’ reason! And Pete’s there, for some reason! They start playin’ music together. And they’re like “Oh, let’s play some fuckin’ covers from some other bands!” It was like, Green Day and fuckin’ Misfits and fuckin’ Ramones! Pete said to Joe “Yo, we gotta change this shit up! Yo, we’ve played all these bands; let’s play shit from Fall Out Boy.” And so Pete and Patrick are like “Yo, that’s dope. But we need a fuckin’ drummer!” Because Patrick’s playin’ drums and he’s a singer! Patrick’s like “Yo! I got a soul voice!” And they’re like “Wait, how do you have a soul voice!?!” And he’s like “Yo, watch this! Yeah!” and they’re like “Oh my god! That sounds like soul!” So they put it in the song and it was like “WHERE IS YOUR BOY TONIGHT!”
And then they’re like: “Yo, this is fuckin’ perfect. This is Fall Out Boy.” And they made records like, Evening Out With Your Ex-Girlfriend. Evening Out With Your Ex-Girlfriend, everybody loves it.
-It’s called: Evening Out With Your Girlfriend.
-With Your Ex-Girlfriend! It’s called Evening Out With Your Ex-Girlfriend! It’s called Eating Out Your Girlfriend, and it’s real and it doesn’t matter. And Pete talked to Patrick and Joe and he was like “Yo, what the fuck! Yo, this is gonna be fuckin’ dope!” So they made a record, and it was called: Take This To Your Grave. They made it without a drummer! And they had like three, four drummers come in. The four drummers they had come in were like: Josh Freese, Neil Peart, the dude from Toto… The fourth one was like the guy from Papa Roach or something. And they were like, “Yo, we need Andy Hurley. Andy Hurley. Take this to your grave. Fuckin’ record it.” And he did it, and he killed it. He was like,Bigadigadigalalululapssshhhh! Killing the skins! Tapping the skins! Tapping the rims! Playing the shit! Killing these bitches! Wrapping it out!
(You’re getting a fucking tattoo right now! What the fuck is going on?!)
“We should get signed, to Fueled by Ramen. ‘Cause these guys know what the fuck is going on.” And they were like “Yo, if you can make our scene any bigger than it is, which is not fuckin’ hard. We will sign you guys.” Pete was like ”Yo! We got this record that’s fuckin’ dope dude! It’s called Take This To Your Grave.“ Hey, it’s gonna be called From Under The Cork Tree, it’s gonna be fuckin’ huge. And then Patrick’s like “I gotta keep it real, I gotta keep it artistic. These are three songs that are gonna make the album and it’s called (burp), this is called: Thanks for the Memories, 20 Dollar Nosebleed, and Sugar We’re Going Down..” And they made this record that was fucking dope and it fucking hit on the charts.
Like: one, two, three! Three, two one! Three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten! TEN TO ONE! From Under The Cork Tree sold like, four million records! Ten million records! Fifteen million records! And Brendon Urie had nothing to do with the entire record. And Patrick was like “That’s good!” Pete was like “Yo, fuck you! I can do whatever I want!” Joe was like “Yeah, it’s cool man, whatever… I don’t give a shit.” And then Andy was like “Eh… Cool!” And Pete was like “Makeup is fuckin’ great for a guy. Because it makes a guy look beautiful. Which a lot of times, a guy is not beautiful. And I wanna change that.I wanna make sure everybody thinks that guys are beautiful.”
(-I’m good so far.
-You wanna spit one more time?
-Yeah, I do.
…Shut the fuck!..)
Pete was like “Oh my god, I’m so embarrassed about this dick pic!” And then I saw the dick pic, and I was like “Eh, it’s not bad. It’s not a bad dick. Let’s be real.” We made Rolling Stone one issue before Fall Out Boy. And Fall Out Boy made the issue right after us and they were so pissed! They were like “Yo, fuck you guys!” They were like “Yo! Panic has the fucking cover of Rolling Stone!?! Yo, fuck these dudes, we’re gonna fucking go miles above! We’re gonna hit every fucking continent there is known to man!” But they didn’t! Because they missed a second of time. Apparently, they were like: “Oh, shit we got every continent.” And they didn’t actually hit it. Dude, Pete was like “What the fuck!” Oh, you didn’t fuckin’ make the continent. It’s like, fuck you!
So From Under The Cork Tree happens, we fuckin’ have three, four years of awesomeness! Like people are cumming on themselves, ‘cause it’s so big! So Fall Out Boy was like, so Patrick’s like “Yo, we’re gonna name this record ‘From Under The Cork Tree’ and From Infinity On High.” Pete was like “Yo, Folie à Deux means, the Theatric of Two.” Fall Out Boy was like “Yo, we gotta take a break” meaning, Pete was like “Yo, we gotta take a break bro” and Patrick’s like, “I need time for my music! Uhhh!” And Joe’s like “Yo, I need time to find the fuckin’ art dude I gotta find some fuckin’ meau-metal.” And Andy’s like “I’m just gonna play with some fuckin’ metal bands.”
And they were like, “Alright, this breaks been like three years long. Two years long. Three years long. Three and a half? We gotta fuckin’ come back man. We gotta come back STRONG!
(-You took my beer away, what the fuck?!
-No, you poured it all over yourself!
-Yeah, you poured it on yourself, man.)
We gotta make this shit legit. It’s gonna be fuckin’ dope. It’s gonna go fuckin’ sky high. We’re gonna make a fuckin’ record that sails the skies. We’re gonna call this record: “Save Rock And Roll."” So they made Alone Together, Light 'Em Up, Alone Together, Phoenix. And everyone’s like “What the fuck? You’re working with this guy who fuckin’ recorded Avril Lavigne and P!nk!”
(-What the fuck is this on my shirt, did I puke on my shirt?
-No, you poured beer all over yourself!
-Oh god…)
Pete was like: “Yo, were gonna end up on the tour with Panic! At The Disco and Twenty Pilots.” (Burp, spit) And that’s all. And that’s all that matters. And that is how the fucking story goes.

anonymous asked:

Good fics but somehow underrated? Let's give our less known writers some love!!!!

*pats you on the back* you’re a good bean

Light a Candle for the Fallen Angel

it’s whatever you like (make it feel good)

I wanna see your pompoms from the stands 

Starving

Some Will Win, Some Will Lose

Give love a try, one more time (wip)

Complications

The First Time I Saw I Love, I Was With You

excuse me, do me or lose me (STOP SLEEPING ON THIS ONE JFC)

(He’s) Definitely a Keeper

This Swirling Storm Inside

Puppy Love

for always the thorn lies under the rose

Something New

Billy Jean

The Money Maker

‘I’ll Love Him Anyway.’

Let’s Be Alone Together

This World Ends With Us

Not That I’d Admit Anything

In Darkness He Is All I See (IM REALLY UPSET THIS DOESN’T HAVE MILLIONS OF KUDOS)

How Far Are We Falling?

Hey guys! I wanna say something: Yesterday I saw the new pics of Bill and I was not shocked - I was surprised and proud. Why proud? That’s easy: He’s doing what he wants and he give a shit of stupid comments! This is one of million reasons why I call Bill fckng amazing Kaulitz my biggest inspiration!!! In my opinion the shoot says: “I can wear what I want and it doesn’t matter if I’m a woman or a man!” And I’m so happy, that there are more positives comments. If you don’t like it, constructive criticism is also OK, but the insult is only a big bullshit (keep it to yourself)! And this is an another thing where I really know why I have this alien on my arm.
Bill, you are a great person and an amazing artist! Damn, you made it! 💪 This photoshoot wasn’t only a shoot, it was pure art! I love you babé!

one of (about a million) good things about ‘Ezra in New Hope’ AU: Luke getting some lightsaber training beyond, y’know, ‘trust the Force and you probably wont die maybe’

im just glad sw fandom is so big because i would never draw anything remotely reminding a Millenium Falcon interior but google Has it, thank you sw fandom

The Joker x Reader - “Old Habits”

Everyone in the underworld answers to The Organization. This only happens once, but you will be auctioned to the other members that already served their term and for 6 months you will belong to that person. You have to do anything they ask, both on personal and business level. All the profits go to The Organization; you can’t keep anything for yourself; you can’t escape, you can’t avoid it, just postpone the inevitable. After your 6 months, you can choose and stay as a bidder (just like you did).

“We’ll start the bidding at $500.000 ! “ the auctioneer points towards The Joker, who is chained to the wall and sure doesn’t look pleased with this evening’s events. But there is nothing he can do about it and he is aware of it. He certainly fought them, that’s why he’s tight up. J should have known better but …there he is.

You lift your hand up and so do several more.

“You’re popular, Mister Joker” the announcer snickers and you know J enough to notice he might snap soon. Please don’t do anything reckless, it’s only going to make it worse, you think to yourself, worried.

“What about a million dollars, hm?”

Poison Ivy turns towards you, winking:

“Wanna share him? We can go half-half girl,” she bites her lip, enthusiastic.

“Not on J, Ivy”, you answer, determined to hold your ground.

“Uhhhh, you’re no fun Y/N! But I can understand how powerful an old flame can be… ” she sighs, playing with her hair.

“ 2 million?” you hear and you lift your hand again. So many wanting him… If anybody else gets The Clown Prince of Crime it won’t be pretty. He can probably handle it… and yet something inside you doesn’t want you to give up.

“ 5 million! “ you raise your voice and all heads turn towards you.

The Joker finally notices you and grinds his teeth, definitely not glad with the encounter.

“6!” Ivy waves at the auctioneer, excited.

“7!” you keep on going, irritated she is just doing it to antagonize you.

“8!”

You take a deep breath and loudly exclaim:

“12 million!” People start talking and whispering and Ivy pouts, already bored:

“She can have him for that price,” she giggles, elbowing you. You pinch her arm, smiling and relieved you won.

“12 million going once, going twice…. Mister Joker is sold to Miss Y/N for 12 million!”

Everyone starts clapping and congratulating you; he just stares with a blank expression on his face, wanting to kill everyone in the huge room. At least he didn’t do anything stupid for once.

***********************

“Untie him,” you command once J is brought to your quarters. He starts cussing, trying to kick the guards and you cover his mouth while they take the chains off.

“Please shut up, you’ll get in trouble. It’s your turn and there is nothing you can do about it. If you run or try to trick them, they will take away everything from you and you’ll have nothing to get back to in Gotham, you know it. Most than likely you’ll end up dead; they don’t like rebellions, no matter who the person is. Are you good now?” you ask and his chest goes up and down really fast but he nods a yes. “Good, “you let go and the guards are done too. “Leave us,” you signal and once they are gone you close the door behind them, finally relaxing a bit.

“Where the hell were you???!!!” he stomps towards you, extremely furious and pushes you so brutally you almost fall on your back. “You just left me without a word???!!  Gone for 8 months and now I find myself here with you as my buyer for the next half a year?!!! Do…do you know how long I’ve… I’ve searched for you?” he takes it down a notch, keeping his hands in his hair, panting.

You just regain your balance and calmly inform him:

“You know I postponed my time for as long as I could until they didn’t play along anymore. They came for me at my apartment and I had to go. I couldn’t contact you because they don’t allow it, you know the rules. I thought you would have guessed on why I disappeared…I didn’t leave you…” you blink faster, rubbing your cheeks, not wanting to get too emotional about it.

“Why didn’t you come back, hm?” he points his finger at you, still mad. “Your 6 months were up two months ago!!!”

“I stayed for you!” you suddenly scream and he frowns, not expecting it. “I knew your time will be up soon and you won’t be able to avoid it. I wanted to buy you so none of the ones having a grudge against you will !!!! Once you leave you can’t come back so I stayed. That’s why I chose to remain here as a bidder, you, you…ungrateful JERK!!!” you lash out at him, upset and almost regretting your decision.

“Jeez, thanks,” The Joker has the nerve to sarcastically mock you, even if on the inside he gets the picture.

“You dare talking to me like this, J?!” you tremble with anger, trying not to have a meltdown. “You know this is everyone’s chance to get revenge on those whom they don’t like or have a grudge against. And you, King of Gotham… “ you smirk, fuming with vexation,”… have a lot of enemies among our own. You should be so grateful right now that you’re mine and not someone else’s! Do you know Ivy wanted to share, huh? Do you know what happens to the men she buys? I’ve seen it and it’s not pretty. Harvey hates you, he would have torn you to pieces until the bitter end of your 6 months. Riddler would have driven you insane, really insane; you wouldn’t have recognized yourself at the end of your time!!! You think you know mind games? HA! Try his!… And the list goes on and on!”

You take a deep breath because spitting out this stuff made you all worked up.

J definitely seems speechless for once; he keeps on looking at you up and down, debating:

“Who… who bought you?” he utters, taking off his jacket and placing it on the bed.

“I was lucky it was Dr. Freeze,” you sniffle. “Due to his…condition, I mostly just had to do the business part for The Organization. A few times…”, he sees your eyes getting teary, “…I don’t want to talk about it, OK? And then I stayed…waiting for you…so I can get you and nobody else. That’s how much I cared. But don’t worry, that’s not the case anymore,” you hiss at him, regaining your composure. “ I just wanted to repay you for that time during the Wayne Industry heist you saved my life. I don’t want to owe you, understand?” you quickly make up a reason this way it won’t show how hurt you are. He has no idea what you’ve been through and what it took for you to stay when all you desired was to leave and run back to him.

The Joker just lifts his shoulders up, puckering his lips:

“So this means I don’t have to sleep with you and all that stuff since I’m yours for 6 months?”

“Exactly, I don’t want you to touch me; just worry about the business part of it and get them as much money as they want!  I’m responsible for you so try not to get us both killed. Then you’re done and that’s it. If you want to stay as a bidder afterwards, it will be your choice,” you grumble, shaking your head since J is really getting on your nerves.

He deliberates for a few seconds before talking again:

“So…what am I supposed to do if I…get…the urge, Doll?”

“What?!” you snarl, not amused. The Joker was hoping it would make you smile.“Whatever you did while I was gone!” you bark at him and head towards the bathroom, adamant to take a shower, maybe it will help cool you off.

You hear the knock in the door and it scares you. Were you two really loud?! Hopefully they didn’t hear the argument or you’re in big trouble.

“Take your shirt off, quickly!” you tell him while you pull your dress over your head, taking your bra off and tossing it to the side. He knows why so for once he does as asked and you push him in bed, getting on top of him really fast and covering everything you can with the blanket.

“Come in,” you turn your head and one of the guards walks in, averting his eyes when he sees the both of you like that.

“What is it? I’m busy enjoying my prize!” you growl, covering your breasts with your hands.

“I’m so…so sorry to interrupt, Miss Y/N. I have the Organization’s list of everything Mister Joker has to do for 6 months, all the heists, kidnappings and…”

“Yeah, yeah, I know,” J replies, irked, getting on his elbows. “Just get out, we know the drill; the lady’s having fun, OK? She sure wants her money’s worth so I have to get back to business, like…NOW!”

“Leave that stuff on the table,” you point with your head and the guard obliges, turning around afterwards and exiting your quarters.

“Of course, m-my apologies again,” he nervously stammers, closing the door.

“Good, this helped, it looks believable,” you whisper. “Would you take your hand out of my bikini?!” you slap his arm, trying to kick him in the crotch as you get off him.

“Heyyyy, watch the merchandise, you paid 12 million for it!” J snickers and he doesn’t like the fact that you’re still upset. But he was a complete ass, so…

“You’re not worth it, trust me…” you sadly reply and he bites his tongue because he sure wants to say something very mean. “I’m going for a shower, I have 2 more bathrooms in my quarters, pick one,” you let him know with a sour expression on your face, heading back towards your own.

*************************

“So I’m sleeping here?” he inquires, slamming 4 pillows on the bed.

“Yes, you know the rules: you have to sleep in the same bed with your buyer. Sometimes they raid the rooms at night, they sure don’t care about privacy too much. You can’t lock the doors, ever.  We have to follow protocol.”

The Joker huffs, fiddling around with his boxers before sitting down.

“How was sleeping in the same bed with Dr. Freeze?” he inquires, watching you roll your eyes:

“Cold!” you shortly reply and continue: “This is a double king so there’s plenty of space. Make sure you stay on your side, don’t try your sneaky ways with me,” you warn him, getting comfortable under your comforter. You reach your hand and turn off the lamp when you hear:

“Hey, Y/N, do they have stripers here?”

“Shut the hell up, J!” you place the cover on top of your head, hoping he’ll be quiet.

“No, seriously, do they?” he tries again.

Since you don’t answer, The Joker assumes he can continue yapping:

“I think you should know I might have got somebody pregnant.”

“For God’s sake, give it a rest, will you?” you turn on the other side. “I don’t care!”  but after a few seconds he is so pleased to hear your muffled voice from under the covers: “Did you really?!”

His maniacal laughter resonates in the bedroom and you decide not to say anything anymore.

************************

You wake up sweating, feeling really hot and you realize why: he got under your comforter and he’s squeezing the life out of you in his sleep.

“J, wake up, go on your side!” you take his hands away from around your waist, not wanting him so close to you. “This better be your gun!” you push him away, not entertained at the situation.

“Nope, not my gun, you know I sleep naked,” he groans, half asleep. “Old habits, don’t flatter yourself,” and he tries to snuggle by you again.

“I’m not. Stop bugging me, I mean it!” you punch him in the arm, aggravated again.

“Don’t hit me!” he musters, trying really hard not to hit you back. “…What the hell is this?!” J grumbles, feeling your skin from under your t-shirt.

“Not all my missions were easy, I have more scars now, “you confess, not happy at the memories, pulling away from him and he finally lets go and rolls over towards his side of the bed.

“I’m sure you deserved it,” he maliciously responds, getting cozy with his pillows. He certainly likes to bite.
“Just make sure you do what you have to do for your 6 months and then you’re done…we’re done with this nonsense…” you sulk since you are fed up with his crap.

“Whatever, I don’t give a damn!” he has one last outburst before winding down. “Hey, Y/N, can you imagine me sleeping in the same bed with Dead Shot or Harvey? Those guys are boring.”

And you thought he was done. But you don’t reply.

“But Ivy though… that woman knows how to make other men want her and… ouch, hey, watch it!” The Joker protests when he receives one of your pillows right in the face. “ I’m keeping this one too,” he decides, and he hears you mumble not very nice things; it pleases him to realize he still has the power to antagonize you.

***********************

He came back from one of his mission with a black eye. Because of his pale skin, it looks so much worse than it is.

“Can you see?” you ask, staring at his eye: definitely doesn’t look clear blue anymore: just red, swollen and inflamed.

“Somewhat,” J sighs, grabbing the ice bag from your hand and placing it over his bruise.

“You should go to one of the doctors here, I don’t want you to go blind,” you pout, unconsciously keeping your hand on top of his.
“I thought you don’t care, Doll,” he pushes your hand away, pretending to be in pain.

“I don’t,” you are fast to respond. “I just want you to be able to continue with your assignments, remember I am responsible for you.  Are you sure you don’t need a doctor?”

“Pffttt, I’m OK, I’m The Joker. I don’t need anybody for anything,” he puffs, hinting at you not being important to him.

Like you need clues.

“Yes, honey,” you make it a point of being overly sarcastic while saying it, “we are all aware of that!” and you slam the door, leaving the confused J sitting on the couch with a displeased expression on his face. He sure believed you will put up with his temper and venomous remarks and baby him. This is what you used to do…

********************

He returned from a robbery with two bullet wounds in his right arm. The medical team took care of that and patched him up well, but you know it’s not going to be easy: he’s never been a good patient.

He keeps on tossing and turning, wincing in pain while you want to nap. You try not to pay attention but he won’t quit. You even cover your head with a pillow; it’s no use.

“Doll, I think I have a fever,” he whines, pulling at your blanket.

“Uuuhhhhh,” you get up on your side, wishing you have shared him with Ivy so she can get a taste of his wonderful interpersonal skills. But since you didn’t…joke’s on you. “No you don’t!” you snap but move towards him anyway to check. Old habits

“See? I’m burning up,” J complains and starts purring when you touch his forehead.

“You’re fine, you don’t seem… too…hot…” you utter and glare when he takes your hand and kisses it.

“I am hot, maybe horny, can’t really tell,” he flashes his silver smile at you, winking.

“Stop your stupid games!” you back out, regretting you felt for it.

“What games?! I got shot and I’m in pain. Com’ere,” he gestures for you and it makes you cringe.

“No, I’m fine where I am,” you decline and The Joker is not used with rejection. He opens his mouth to say something vicious and you just ignore him. “Good night!” you cut it short, wanting to rest. You manage to put your ear plugs in, not willing to listen to a single word that comes out of his mouth anymore. He sure blurred out a lot of things that you didn’t hear.

*************************

2 in the morning and you wake up startled, not knowing why. You stretch, adjusting against your body pillow when you hear J groan in his sleep, uncomfortable from his fresh wounds he got on another commision today.

He’s dozing off in the middle of the bed and since you have the nightlight on you can distinguish the grimace of pain on his face and messy green hair all over the place. You watch his restless sleep for a while and bite your cheek, worried without even noticing. You move close to him and touch his forehead but it doesn’t seem like he has a fever.

You remember how you used to comfort him when he got injured in the past and you press your lips against the bandages, not even knowing why you’re doing it. Old habits

“What are you doing, Pumpkin?” J yawns, scrunching up his face with his eyes closed.

“Kissing it better,” you bitterly reply and can’t help but sensing your heart beating faster when he answers:

“It does feel better…” and he softly pulls on your hair, snoozing, playing with the long strands until he’s out cold again. You wouldn’t know that what you did sure relaxed him; he wouldn’t admit to it even if it kills him, but he really misses your touch. Old habits

You swear in your mind this is the only time you will be nice to him since he really screwed up. You have to be strong, this way you can have revenge for all the anguish you suffered for his sake.

*********************

Today is the end of his 6 months service and The Joker ended up being stabbed on his mission. Since it’s quite a superficial lesion, they allowed him to take the rest of the day off. He mopes around the quarters, delighted his ordeal is over with. He sure didn’t enjoy serving his time for The Organization. So much money, diamonds and guns he got for them and he couldn’t keep anything. He completely detests it but there was no way around it.

Where is she? J wonders since he didn’t see you at all today. He really wants to get out of there as soon as possible.

You enter the rooms with the 4 guards and seem deep in thought. When you leave the premises for good you have to always be accompanied by them; you can’t take anything with you; all stays behind.

“Finally, Y/N, let’s get out of here!” he impatiently grabs your hand and starts dragging you out. “Walk faster!” J barks and after a few moments you yank your hand away, staying behind while the security team closely follows his steps. He turns his head, reaching for you again while pacing down the hallway.

“Come on, what you are doing?! Move it!”

“I’m staying…” The Joker hears your voice echoing and he halts, alarmed, not even knowing why he has this strong desire for you to follow him.

“You’re what?!” he tilts his head, irritated and wants to head back towards you but the guards won’t let him.

“You can’t go back, sir, you know the rules. Please keep on walking!”

“What the hell are you doing, Y/N?! Let’s go!” he yells, trapped in between the wardens.

You blink fast a few times, hesitant. You sure want to get out of the place as fast as him… yet:

“They’re bringing Frost in tomorrow,” you talk loud enough so he can hear you. “I want to get him; a lot of them hate Jonny for his connection to you.”

“That’s so stupid, Doll! I thought you want to run out of here as soon as I was done with my time!” he shouts as the guards make him move again.

He keeps on looking back and you don’t say anything; you just lift your hand and wave a faint good-bye, your eyes getting watery while watch him depart. You don’t even know why you are so upset; he’s definitely not worth it.

“Fuck!” J grumbles, irked he won’t see you anytime soon. He can’t understand why his selfish self keeps on having doubts about leaving you behind; you’re definitely not worth it. “Hold on!” he gets the attention of his wardens. He takes a deep breath and passes his fingers through his hair, wanting to keep his mouth shut but something inside makes him pronounce the words: “I’m staying as a bidder.”

“Are you sure, Mister Joker?” one of the guys double checks.

“Yes, I’m sure, even if I’m aware this is the most stupid ass decision I’ve ever made…besides dating her, of course,” he scoffs, heading back towards you.

You pretend you don’t care at all when he comes in front of you and starts rambling, dramatically gesturing to accentuate his feelings:

“If you think you will get Frost and sleep with him in the same bed without me supervising the whole damn thing, you’re wrong!”

“Huh?!” you look so confused when he angrily hugs you.

Him and his stupid jealousy… Old habit.

 Also read- MASTERLIST

http://diyunho.tumblr.com/post/153664676321/joker-x-reader-masterlist

So baby Driver is very good

Like, very good.

Probably my favorite edgar write film?

Two things I wanna touch on real quick, no spoilers. Just nice things. The movie handles Baby’s tinnitus very well. And I was extremely impressed by the representation of Joe, his caretaker, as a deaf man. There’s a lot of ASL the do to each other over the course of the film and I fuckin loved it.

And speaking of representation, there was a really great moment AFTER the film where a buddy of mine is just all smiles and goes “he had tinnitus like me!”. Which was cute as hell.

Its these little things that make people love films a million times more. And I love the SHIT out of this movie