So I asked him about love and what it meant to him. My mind was split into wanting to listen and fighting to silence the memories that raged in my own head, each one an ear-splitting scream. He said love was about trust, it was about being loyal, but all I could see was your hand in mine and sand between our toes and secret smiles shot that always hit home. He told me he wasn’t sure he’d ever been in love, not truly, not the head over heels kind of way that leaves you struggling for breath and your heart pounding a rhythm you’ve never heard before.
I nodded in understanding even though I couldn’t relate, even though I could remember spilling my doubts and my fears like oceans and feeling the soothing sensation of the wind on my wet skin, knowing I was being listened to. Knowing I was home, here, with you, with salt clinging to my lashes. Knowing I could reach out and brush my thumb over the curve of your lips and having you lean into my touch. He said love was something that had to be felt, not seen, and I thought of the way your eyes lit up when I laughed or the quiet way you watched me when you spoke, waiting for my reaction. When he asked me about love, I told him I was sorry.
Sorry because the part of me that wanted to finally stop living in the past ached, but the other part that clung to memories like they were its anchor to this world won. It won because when I had asked you about love all these years ago, you’d only stared at me, that weird expression on your face and said, “why waste time explaining when I can show you?”
do you have any advice about getting your fics read a lot / popular / out there when you don't have a lot of followers on tumblr and ao3?
I started writing umfb with only a handful of followers on both tumblr and AO3 and none of them being YOI fans so trust me when I say it’s perfectly possible to get popular fics even if you have no basis to work from. Although honestly it’s a combination of your own writing, the preferences of the fandom and luck that dictates what gets popular and what doesn’t.
First things first, you want to make what you write appealing to people to make them want to read it. Think about what someone is going to see on A03 when they look at your fic and if that’s going to make them want to click on it. Tag well, don’t put too many or people wont bother to read them all but tag all the things in your fic that people in fandom want to read so it’s easily searchable for people looking for specific things. Looking at the popular tags page of AO3 can help with this. Also, tag your triggers! If your story has anything potentially triggering like rape, major character death etc then tag them. Those tags are there for a reason and it’s very bad fandom practice not to warn people about potentially triggering material.
Next, think about your summary. It needs to draw attention, people want to know what they’re getting into when they read a fic so don’t make it super vague or people wont bother but leave an air of mystery about the story to draw people in. Just enough information to make it clear what the story is about but enough intrigue to make people want to click on your story (summaries are the hardest part of writing for me so this can be a very difficult one!). Also, don’t degrade yourself in the summary or the tags. If you say something like ‘this sucks but read it anyway’ or ‘I suck at summaries but it’s good I promise’ or even ‘my first ever fanfic’, it’ll put people off straight away. It makes you not sound confident in your work and if you’re not confident in it then other people wont be either.
Once you’ve got your front page worked out, let’s think about the fic itself. The first thing that that will immediately make me exit out of a fic is no paragraph breaks. You need to present the story well so it’s easy to read or the likelihood is that people wont bother. Also, your first paragraph is really, really important. Your first line even more so. Think about what someone who has never read you fic before will see when they start reading and if it is gripping enough to make them stay. Your first line should hook the reader in and your first paragraph should make them want to know more. If it’s boring them might click out and go onto something else. There’s no set rules for what your first paragraph needs to be about but if you’re giving an in depth description of a character’s clothing or telling the reader all about the colour of their hair people might get bored and not bother to read further. Make it snappy, make it interesting, make people want to know more.
The rest of your first chapter (assuming we are talking about multichapters here) can be whatever you want to be but remember that you want people to subscribe. There is nothing wrong with short chapters but something has to happen in your first chapter to make people care enough to be willing to wait for the next part. It doesn’t need to be anything big or game changing but there needs to be some element of suspense at the end to make people want to know what happens next. If the entire first chapter is just world building and nothing happens to any of the characters or the plot doesn’t move at all, some people might be put off. However, a lot of this depends on the quality of the writing, some writers can pull of something completely against everything I’ve just said and that’s brilliant. But as a general rule of thumb for getting started this is what I’ve seen to work more often than not.
Finally, post at a good time. I’m not the best person to ask about posting times but if you google the best time to post on AO3 some people have come up with really good summaries of when the traffic is high or not. Sometimes posting in high traffic is good because there are more readers, sometimes it’s bad because your fic might get lots in the flood. Honestly it’s all just a gamble.
Apart from that, the rest is pretty much up to you and the quality of your writing, fandom preferences and luck. If you write a popular trope more people will read it as opposed to something niche. It doesn’t mean your writing is any less quality but sometimes people just don’t want to read about certain things even if you want to write about them and there’s nothing you can do to change that. And the other part is luck. I’ve read some truly fantastic fics in previous fandoms that have very little recognition and some ones that I personally dislike but everyone else seems to love. Luck does play a huge part in whether your fic gets read or not, it’s just an unfortunate fact of fandom.
And finally, this is not going to be helpful advice for YOI since it is now very established but if your main goal is popularity, write fast and write early. The newer a fandom is the more interest there is and the less fics are out there so the more people will read what there already is. I started writing umfb when YOI was still coming out because interest was very high and there were no rivals fics out there yet which meant I could write for a popular trope that currently had no competition. The bigger a fandom is, the harder it is to get recognized. That is absolutely not saying that you shouldn’t write for big fandoms! Every fic is a gift and there is no such thing as too much fanfic, especially when there is long waits between official content being produced. But don’t beat yourself up if your fic isn’t as popular as the big fics out there on the first page. I guarantee you most of them will have been started being written early on in the fandom which means those writers were writing in completely different circumstances than you. Plus popularity is entirely subjective. Although it’s going to sound completely ironic coming from me, I’ve never actually been in a fandom where my favourite fic is the most popular one. Everyone likes different things, everyone writes about different things and even if your fic isn’t the most popular one out there it doesn’t mean that people wont love it. Just write what you want to write and remember, there is no-one who can write your fic like you can!
Slytherin: the sharp clicking of heels, scribbled signatures, carless smirks, winks, coffee with whipped cream cause you need the sugar, running purely of adrenaline and drive, “sleep is for the weak”, not giving a damn about the status quo, plotting murder against donald trump, always having an escape plan, twitter fights because this person is just bugging me today, knowing exactly who you’d die for, playing music too loud then turing it down because “damn now i’ve got a headache”, not trusting perfect,so much sarcasm,“i’ve got it covered not really” just slytherin things.
Hufflepuff: laughing till your stomach hurts, baking brownies, refusing to swear, flipping the bird at the backs of authority, “but that’s unfair!”, helping a blind man, volunteering, hating something about someone but being two polite to say it to their face, feminism, trusting to much, spending all your money on sweets, “its not their fault”, little to no patience, rushing homework because “i was having too much fun, laughing at their own joking, so many dad jokes, sleeping in, “I’m so sorry professor my dog ate my homework”, all the puns, cheesy grins and lazy smiles, “I am not a hipster i swear”, actually waiting until their old enough to get tumblr, “i’m only breaking the rules because there stupid rules. just hufflepuff things.
Ravenclaw: endless pages of doodles, writing until your hands sore, being the teachers pet but hating said teacher, getting away with everything, literally pulling out hair from stress, stress eating, saying important things in a casual manner, knowing all the disney songs, “gosh darn i forgot my luncheon”, losing your library card, “I’m not fit enough to cary all theses books!”, all the cute animals, writing publishable fanfiction, “its technically not a lie…”, overachievers, purposely failing classes because there boring, “bORing”, eye rolls, nutella addictions, running purely of caffeine, colour coded everything, new phones, overdue books, charming smiles, long answers, rainy inside days, just ravenclaw things.
Gryffindor: “i would but I don’t like you”, friendship bracelets, crushes, “come on it’ll be fun”, truth or dare, hangovers, dancing in the rain, hugs, “I’m about as straight as the amazon river”, flirty winks, running till you can’t, lights in your eyes, humming kpop, fighting over stupid stuff, internet famous, possessiveness, singing around a bonfire, extrovert, 2 steps ahead of the trends, wishing on shooting stars, “i’ll prove it!”, running out of charge, perfect makeup or no makeup, “but we’re just friends?”, making yourself full on sweets, mephobia, “what could go wrong?”, just meeting deadlines, blue lips and smiles, binge watching, funny faces, short skirts, curled hair, odd talents, grins. just gryffindor things.
he looks at me, cross-eyed and star-gazed,
and i feel bad until i walk out without
kissing him goodbye.
he doesn’t chase after me.
he doesn’t know it’s a sign.
he doesn’t feel gravity pulling me away
from his shoulder blades.
only i do.
i stop saying goodnight and he stops
sending me good morning text messages.
he doesn’t notice like i didn’t notice.
i know now why you looked so prepared:
it’s easy to prepare for a fall out when
you’re the only one falling out.
i get it. seeing my name light up on
your phone screen at 2 a.m. wasn’t something
you wanted to deal with. i get it because
at 2 a.m. he tells me how much he wants me
and i realize i want to break his heart
to mend your guilty conscience.
i want to break his heart so i can forgive you,
to give you an excuse for walking out
after you were the source of my pain.
i want to break his heart so i’ll understand
the explanation you never gave me
by not giving him an explanation.
i want to tell him the truth but it’s easier
to take the long way home than
have faith that he’ll dodge
the razorblades spilling out of my mouth
without catching them like swords.
listen, i’m an effect,
and you didn’t want to be the cause but
you are the volcano and i am the riptides
after your fire drowns my ocean,
hoping someday to swallow you alive.
it’s okay. i’ve always been an effect–
the tears, blankets like mountains
devouring my bed.
i’m sorry. i’m sorry to everyone
i will never get the chance to meet
because i am too busy holding hands with a ghost.
i know, i know, i know.
trust me, i wish we could all let go.
the anxiety diaries ft. the endless cycle of our inability to say goodbye
a/n: i spent three hours reading cheating angst fanfics and i should be working on my school projects but there is no such thing as school on tumblr tbh (my writing skills have gone down dont hurt me pls lmao)
pairing: taehyung x reader
His box-like smile always made you giggle. His deep and soothing voice helped you fall asleep when you were broken. When he called out your name sweetly as you clawed his back, the two of you covered in sweat. The two of you decided to get married.
It was a dark and cloudy Sunday night, and the weather was pissing you off. The wind made it hard for you to walk, and the rain made your hair stick to your face. Customers at the cafe you worked at were assholes, and they never payed you enough.
But at least you still had Taehyung.
You opened the front door with a quiet grunt, throwing your shoes off your feet. The living room was pitch black, which made you shiver. You ran to the light switch and flipped it up, sighing with relief when the light flickered on. It was quite funny to you and Taehyung - a grown woman, still scared of the dark. You chuckled weakly at the thought, the only thing you wanted to do right now was collapse in Taehyung’s arms and sleep.
You turned the door knob to your bedroom.
“I-I’m going to..ah!”
You froze, eyes widening at the familiar voice. You covered your mouth with both hands, squeezing them together.
Taehyung, your husband, was fucking a girl that wasn’t you.
The woman beneath Taehyung shrieked at you, pushing him off and scrambling to grab her clothes. You stumbled as you let her push past you. The front door slammed with an echo.
Taehyung took a few seconds to figure out what was going on. He stared at you with squinted eyes that slowly turned into regret.
You fell to your knees, eyes wide with tears streaming down your face. You completely broke down, unable to talk. Taehyung quickly jumped off the bed and ran to you. He knew exactly what was happening, and he was fucking terrified.
“(y/n)!” Taehyung yelled, shaking your shoulders. You had completely broken down- your heart thumped loudly.
Your sister had died.
You were on your knees, your face blank with no emotion whatsoever. Your mind disappeared, and your feet moved on your own. You shook Taehyung off and ran to the front door, running into the street.
The car slammed into your side, throwing you into the street. You could hear cars honking, the slam of a door, and loud footsteps.
Taehyung repeated your name, caressing your cheek and whispering, “Its okay, it’s okay. I’m here. Don’t leave, alright? You promised you’d stay with me forever. Shh,” you didn’t understand what he was saying at that time- your ears were ringing so loudly you couldn’t hear.
(end of flashback.)
You felt his hands shake your shoulders wildly, shouting your name. You glanced at the front door. He got up and locked the front door, gasping for breath. “Don’t do this, (y/n).” He shouted, eyes wild.
The rest of the day was a breeze, you didn’t even realize you fell asleep. But you knew you’d remember this the next day.
You woke up with a jerk, shooting a glare to the boy next to you. He snored quietly, and you could see his puffy eyes.
Oh, right. You looked at your ring finger and took off the ring, throwing it at Taehyung’s face.
“W..What was that for, ja-”
“Don’t give me that bullshit!” You screamed, breathing heavily. Taehyung quickly shot up out of bed, looking at the ring. His face fell with realization.
“W-Wait! (y/n)! It-It was a mistake! I got..drun-” He tripped over his words, and you damn well knew he was not drunk.
You laughed weakly, digging your nails into your palm. “You little..I can’t believe I fell in love with you,” you slammed open the closet door, pulling out your clothes and throwing them onto the floor.
“(y/n), don’t do this! I told you, it was a fucking mistake!” He sobbed, clinging to your arm and pulling you away from the closet.
“Mistake my ass,” you growled, shaking him off your arm. You grabbed a duffel bag and shoved your clothes in the small bag, zipping it up quickly. His breath hitched from crying, and he grabbed onto your arm again.
“Please..(y/n)..I..I won’t survive! I won’t be able to do anything, please don’t leave! Everything will go wrong, I can-”
“You should have thought about this before letting her filthy hands crawl all over you.” You spat, shoulders trembling with anger.
You finally turned to look at your lover, almost choking on your words.The man who always had a goofy smile on his face covered his mouth with his hands, whimpering as he cried. His nose was running, and you cringed. It was hard not to wipe his nose or eyes. It hurt.
The two of you stared at each other before you dropped you bag. “Taehyung.” You said sternly, opening your arms. He fell into you, sobbing into your shoulder. You chuckled, running your fingers through his oily hair. “I’ll stay, but I can’t trust you yet.” You whispered. You felt him calm down and nod, sniffling quietly.
“I’m fine with that. As long as I’m with you.”
bad ending here: forever, yes? (how do you work tumblr i stg im such an idiot)
a/n: good lord that was so cheesy ew, please burn it
I love you.
I may not be the first one to tell you that.
I may not have conveyed it in the best way.
But trust me, I mean it.
I swear, I mean it.
I swear, I’ll hold your hands throughout my life.
I swear I’ll never make your eyes cry.
I swear I’ll never hurt you.
Will you be mine?
It scares me to think that I’d be so willing to give myself to you. To pour out my soul into your hands and trust you to keep it safe. To tangle my legs with yours and let you feel my heart beating against your own. To give you a chance to read the maps that lead to my very core; unravel me inch by inch like ribbon; capture me from the inside out and frame me up on your wall even though I will never resemble a masterpiece.
The wind howled at your window as you stared bleakly at the floor that was littered with empty take-out containers, old bowls of instant ramen, and dirty clothes. You sighed sadly and pulled your blanket tighter around you, cursing yourself for not buying the tape you needed to cover up the drafty windows. A single tear formed in your eye and you quickly pushed the palm of your hand into it, stopping it before it could fall. This was your life now.
I hope you trust me
even when it’ll seem
that I’m going insane,
even when it’ll seem
that I’m going astray,
even when it’ll seem
that I messed up my routes
I’m puzzling, I’m crazy,
I’m tricky and crystal clear
and I’m definitely out of mind,
out of any mind,
far from any conventional path,
totally and utterly crazy
and yet I’m a conformist.
You’ll never know
how many aces I’ve got to play.
But there’s a key to unlock
the doors I close.
The only key you can use.
I told you so many times.
The solution in your hands.
I FINALLY REWROTE IT! SO I CAN FINALLY POST IT! and this is just part one my friends, there’s so much more to come!
before i rant, i’d like to thank my friend Dani for suggesting this. I can’t remember your tumblr @ but you know who you are.
but continuing, i thought i’d let you know, i’m going to be a little bit busy over this coming month (school, music, etc) but i am going to try my hardest to write as much as possible! i might have to go back to waking up at 5 and writing in the mornings.
“You know, you’ve never asked to be in one of my videos.”
You looked up from your phone, raising your eyebrow. “And
this is important because?”
Jordan shrugged, sitting down next to you on the couch.
“Well, all of my friends have begged to collab with me because apparently it’s
good publicity or if we were true friends, we’d be making a video together… but
not you. Like, when you’re in my vlogs, my fans get really excited? It’s kinda…
weird. They think you’re cute.”
“Everyone thinks I’m cute. But I’m not. I’m really tough. I
can beat you in an arm wrestling match,” You stated, smirking and putting your
phone down on the coffee table.
“Well honestly, I beg to differ. My fans think you’re the
cutest thing. Especially when we take photos with the dog filter on Snapchat.
Trust me, they eat it up,” He stated, crossing his arms
You rolled your eyes, picking your phone up again and
scrolling through Tumblr. “You’ve got to be kidding me.”
“No, it’s true! Trust me for once please. They have so much
love for you, it’s insane!” Jordan exclaimed, poking your cheek and flashing
his signature grin.
“You know, you can’t just smile and think the world will
fall at your feet. I’ve grown resistant. I have a soul.” You put your phone
down once again and turned to face Jordan, who was now trying his best at
giving you “puppy dog eyes”.
His bottom lip was poking out and he was whining softly,
holding his hands like paws. “Please? I’ll pay you in food?” He suggested. You
rolled your eyes, slapping his arm gently.
“Stop that. I’m sure that even if you asked, they wouldn’t
want me in a video.”
“So what If I do ask? Would you do it then?”
You paused, biting your lip slightly. “If your fans say yes
and you buy me food, there may be a possibility of a video. But it would depend
what the video is and what kind of royalties I get.”
“Royalties? Wow. You sunk low there,” Jordan huffed,
crossing his arms. “That’s one hard deal.”
“You could’ve gotten a real job and we wouldn’t have this
He faked shock, letting out a loud gasp. “Oh gosh! My heard
has been struck by this vile person who does not know how to feel emotions. Wow,
it’s as if my world has ended!” He fell into your lap, looking up at you and
“You should’ve become an actor. You could’ve lazed around
the same amount, but got paid even less. Doesn’t that sound nice?” You said
sarcastically, poking his nose.
“Well, I was in a drama class a long time ago. And there was
“I’ve heard the story before Jordan. If you tell it one more
time, we’re going to have a problem,” You interrupted, putting your hand over
his mouth. He licked your hand, causing you to squeal and pull it away. “You
“So do you want to hear my video idea or not?” Jordan asked,
sitting up and crossing his legs.
“Sure. Fire away.”
“Well, I’ve been looking at all the trends, both old and
new, and I’ve decided that some of them need to be brought back,” Jordan
started, fiddling with the sleeves of his jumper absent-mindedly.
“You know bringing back YouTube trends never ends well. It
could end your career, or my social life. It’s risky as anything and I think
you’re a mad man if you decide to go through with it.”
“Well, I already have decided to go through with it if you
join me. But you know what? It’s going to be the most popular video my channel
has ever produced, because you’re in it!”
You raised your eyebrow. “You really think I’m going to go
through with this, don’t you?”
He shrugged. “Well, as my best friend I was hoping you would.
But, getting back on topic. The boyfriend does my makeup challenge was the
cutest thing ever. And of course, I wouldn’t want to embarrass you, so you
could do my makeup instead which would be fun! Imagine how glam it would be!”
“Woah woah woah! You’re not my boyfriend! Let’s get that
straight before we continue,” You said, crossing your arms and glaring.
“Of course I know that! But… we could make it the best
friend does my makeup challenge? It’d be the cutest thing to exist! And we
could make a vlog where we go shopping together and buy the makeup!” Jordan
exclaimed, smiling wide.
You sighed softly, taking a moment to contemplate. You knew
Jordan wouldn’t stop bugging you if you were to blow him off, so you took the
only answer you could think of that wouldn’t hurt his feelings.
“So when does all of this begin?”
The smile on Jordan’s face grew wider. “Right now!” He
exclaimed, jumping up and grabbing his wallet from the kitchen bench. He grabbed
your hand, yanking you out of the apartment. Your eyes widened as he dragged
you through the streets.
“I didn’t sign up for this!”
“Oh, but you di- damn. I forgot my camera. I’ll be right
back.” He dropped your hand, turning around and bolting back down the hall
towards his apartment.
You shook your head in disbelief, tapping your fingers
against your leg anxiously. All you wanted in life was to make your best friend
happy… so saying yes had to be the correct decision, right?
Tagged by @sonador-reveur @paratmin and @oneamateurgirl1612
Thanks for tagging and sorry if I missed anyone, mention notifications seem to be AWOL 😀
1) How many works in progress to do you currently have?
Loads, I have several notes pages of vague ideas and half rhymes. Some of them are destined to remain unfinished though 😂
2) Do you/would you write fan fiction?
I lack the planning, stamina and concentration needed for things longer than 24 lines, so probably not gonna happen.
3) Do you prefer real books or ebooks?
Both, I’ll read anything I can get my hands on 📕📗📘📙📔📓📖📱
4) When did you start writing?
I started this blog in 2013, but I’ve been writing for as long as I can remember 📝
5) Do you have someone you trust that you share your work with?
All of you lovely Tumblr people 😁 My family have probably read 100-200 of my rhymes at most, not because I don’t trust them. They know about my blog, they’re just not that into poetry. Plus the thought of reading 1000 poems is a bit daunting 😂🤣😱
6) Where is your favourite place to write?
On the couch with coffee ☕️
7) Favourite childhood book?
Revolting Rhymes by Roald Dahl and anything by Paul Jennings
8) Writing for fun or writing for publication?
For fun and entertainment, if I was writing for publication I’d be a very disappointed poet 😂
9) Pen and paper or computer?
iPad or iPhone mostly. I do write out finished poems in notebooks though
10) Have you ever taken any writing classes?
Nope, it’s something I’d like to do one day though
11) What inspires you to write?
Everything. I write down ideas when I have them so that when I’m struggling, I can go through my notes and something generally pops out. Failing that, I read loads of poetry which is inspiring. Poetry Prompt blogs are always good for inspiration too.
According to tumblr you're posting "sensitive" content that is too evil for my pure minor eyes to see. I had no clue that knitting could be inappropriate.
Omg. I had no idea either😹 I am so sorry Tumblr isn’t allowing you to see all of the wonderful knits and WIPs the Tumblr community have beautifully hand crafted!! Trust me, if your pure eyes saw the truth of knitting, you would never turn back
I can feel the knife carving your love in my heart You promised you wouldn’t harm a hair on this fragile body, no that’s not fair But how can I trust you? How can I trust you with My Heart, in Your Hands closing your grip! I’m so afraid that you’ll leave me cold with my heart in your hands closing….
Try to sit here with closed eyes It’s not possible Cause how do I know that you’ll be good doing the things that you know you should Yeah, how can I trust you?