Y/n had a weird feeling when she came over and
the first thing Jungkook did was give her a look that almost looked pitiful? it
confused you to say the least. You worried if you did something? Or something
happened? You honestly had no idea. You didn’t say anything about it, you didn’t
want to stress Jungkook out more then he already looked stressed, you
remembered a couple of the other members giving you looks like that in the past
but never at the same time it was always at weird times…. You played around
with Tae and Hoseok and all your nerves from Jungkook calmed down a bit. By then
you were all called to dinner by Jin, you thanked him for cooking again and
happily ate with the members
You were sitting in front of Jungkook and again
he gave you that look now you were worried you always tried to forget it but
this was different there was a pit in your stomach. You couldn’t control it
this time. When all the members started staring at their phones that pit got
deeper. You gave them their space, maybe their manager texted them? Maybe something
urgent happened? It didn’t help your worrying though. You didn’t want to
overthink this, but you couldn’t help it, are they texting about me? Are they
mad at me? Did I do something? The pit in your stomach getting deeper and
deeper with every thought that ran through your mind. You peaked over to look
at Yoongi’s phone who was sitting next to you. you jumped when he turned his
phone over right when you leaned over.
knew. It was about you… you felt like crying they never talked about you behind
your back but now you had no idea what was going on. You didn’t want to alarm
anyone so you quietly ate your food while everyone’s heads turned up as if
nothing was happening. You felt the stares of some of them…. You honestly
wanted to run out of that door, cry? Throw up? You didn’t know you just wanted
to leave but you didn’t want to cause a scene you pretended everything was ok. Even
suggested a sad movie so you could cry without anyone wondering why. Your anxiety
was running wild thinking the worst of the worst.
During the movie,
you felt Namjoons eyes never leave you. you wanted to cry so bad, your mind
making up the worst scenarios, maybe they didn’t want to be your friend
anymore? Maybe they were thinking of leaving you? you knew better then to
question your best friends but how could you not? Your anxiety getting the best
of you at moments like these weren’t unusual. You ran to their bathroom and
cried. You didn’t want to but you didn’t want to cry in front of them. All you
heard was gentle knocking on the bathroom door after you locked it. “y/n? are
you ok? Please tell me you’re ok” it was Jungkook’s voice. You couldn’t say
anything he seemed to know you were crying but you hoped maybe he wouldn’t. you
couldn’t face them you took the random cap you saw on the door handle said
goodbye to the rest of the members that were awake and walked out of the
bathroom out of their front door.
A/N: so like i tried?? lmao i thought about making this a series ya know angsty maybe fluffy idk yet. tell me what y'all think! i tried making this atleast a bit angsty but i suck at writing angst so idk lol. hope you liked it? Pt. 2??
I remember every detail about the day he left. The sky was grey, my hands were shaking uncontrollably and his hands were steady but his eyes looked dull. “I’m sorry”, I said or atleast tried to say, but I don’t think my words made it past my lips. I wanted to say sorry like it was my fucking fault. It took me months to come to the realisation that it wasn’t. He was bad at loving meanwhile I loved too hard.
My heart broke when he left and it made me realise I was alive but didn’t want to be.