i took like 30 minutes trying to decide what font to use

Guardian Angel

Pairing: Hoseok x Reader x Namjoon

Genre: Angst and slight fluff

Warnings: Mentions of cancer, death, and suicide attempt

Word Count: 6.4k

Summary: A tragedy unexpectedly strikes your family, and when you start to believe that you’ll never be happy again, you meet the person who will change your world.

A/n: Honestly, this took longer than expected to write this, but it’s finally completed. I also would like to give a shout out to @aichan11 for being my beta for this because she’s amazing and put up with all my questions I asked.

Originally posted by lacuna-matata

During the third week of August on a Saturday, you were moving into your dorm, and your loving parents came to help out as you had a ton of boxes to unpack because you over packed, like always. Once you unlocked the door, you were surprised when you saw half of the room already moved in, but then you remembered that you were assigned a roommate over the summer. You didn’t really mind (as long as both of you got along) because it would be nice to have at least one friend here.

After all the boxes had been unloaded and brought up to your room, your parents lingered around before hugging you goodbye because they dreaded this moment, knowing that they would have to leave you on your own after 18 years of you living under their roof. The walk to their car was hard enough as you tried to stay strong with a smile on your face, but when you watched them drive away, you almost made it without shedding a single tear until you saw tears falling from your mom’s eyes. Your blurry vision made it hard for you to look at people in the eye, so you slowly headed back to your room with your eyes glued to the ground. Hopefully this way they wouldn’t be able to see that you were already homesick. As you were decorating your room to make it feel more like home, others on the hallway were still moving in, so it felt quite lonely not being able to introduce yourself yet. Later that evening when you were lying on your neatly made bed, you heard a key rattling in the door, and your head nervously shot to the door being opened. Your wide eyes made eye contact with the person standing in the doorway, and you froze for five seconds before a soft smile formed at the corners of the other person’s mouth.

“Hi, I’m Kara. I’m your roommate,” she said shyly. Kara’s features were delicate yet beautiful. Her brown eyes were as rich as Hershey’s milk chocolate, and they sparkled in the fluorescent light above. Her long dark brown hair smoothed over her back, with the caramel highlights peeking through slightly. From where you were sitting, she didn’t seem that much taller than you, give or take an inch or two.

“Hey, I’m y/n. Nice to meet you,” you said still sitting on your bed without bothering to stand up.

“Nice to meet you too, y/n. Would you like to join me for ice cream? Ever since I got here this morning, I’ve been craving some strawberry cheesecake ice cream, and this town has some of the best.” She took a few steps to stand next to the foot of her bed as she patiently waited for your reply.

You contemplated your answer for a few seconds before replying because honestly, you just wanted to stay in since all this moving wore you out. However, you agreed to it anyways, and when you told her yes, her eyes lit up like lights on a Christmas tree.

The ice cream shop was located next to a tiny run down shopping center 25 minutes off campus. It looked out of place with its brightly lit lights shining through the pristine windows in an area with potholes of all different sizes in the parking lot and closed stores all around. The shuttle bus that dropped your roommate and you off outside of the shop headed back to campus and disappeared into the darkness of the night. Even though the rest of the shops were closed for the night, this ice cream shop was full of lively people laughing and chatting with their friends. School was about to begin for the semester, and people were catching up with others on the details of how they spent their summer, whether it was an internship, work, or traveling. The chatty voices coming from every corner of the room made you want to go back to your dorm for peace and quiet as social situations like these drained your energy, but you couldn’t turn back now because your roommate was so excited for ice cream, and you didn’t want to leave her alone.

Scanning the endless possibilities of ice cream flavors when you got to the front, you saw a little bit of everything – cotton candy, mint chocolate chip, chocolate, birthday cake, rocky road, strawberry cheesecake, chocolate chip cookie dough, and much more. The countless options of different flavors to choose from made it extremely hard to narrow your answer to just one.

“Ma’am, ma’am. What would you like to get?” the worker asked impatiently as a line started to form behind you. You didn’t realize that you were blankly staring at the ice cream in front of you, and you snapped out of your daydream real quick. Embarrassed, you looked around at the people standing behind you and at your roommate already licking her ice cream cone in front of you.

“Oh, I’m so sorry! Uh, I’ll have the strawberry cheesecake ice cream in a waffle cone.” You felt your cheeks blushing instantly from embarrassment. You hadn’t even been out 30 minutes yet, and you were already spacing out.

He handed you your cone with the freshly scooped ice cream, and after paying, you joined your roommate at a table in the back corner.

“So,” you paused for a second to lick the melting ice cream dripping down the side of the cone. The awkward silence was uncomfortable and increased by the minute, so you quickly tried to think of something to chat about. “Are you a freshman, and what’s your major?”

“I’m actually a sophomore, and I am majoring in film production. My brother is an actor, and one day I would like to produce a movie with him as the main actor.”

“Oh, that’s really cool! It seems like fun to study that.” You nodded your head in agreement before adding something else to keep the conversation flowing. “I’m not sure what I want to major in. I was thinking about studying music education because I’m passionate about sharing my love of music to other people.”

“Really? I’ve heard great things about that major since this university has an excellent music program. When I first got here as a freshman, I thought about majoring in audio engineering, but I decided that film was more of my interest.” She sat back in her chair with her arms crossed to try to keep the warmth from leaving her body. “I should have brought a jacket with me even though it’s August. I always get chills after eating ice cream.”

“Yeah, it’s pretty cold in here. I guess they have to keep it like this, so the ice cream won’t melt.”

As you kept the conversation flowing, Kara looked around the room since she noticed that most everyone had already left. Both of your voices seemed to travel across the room more since there weren’t many people in there to drown them out with their commotion.

“Do you think we should leave now? I’m not sure what time they close exactly, but it looks like they will be closing soon,” Kara questioned, interrupting you mid sentence.

“Uh, how will we get back to our dorm? We took the bus here, and I don’t think they run this late. It took the shuttle 25 minutes, so if we did walk back, it’ll take us at least a good hour or more.” You pressed the home button on your phone to view the time, and it read 9:15 p.m. “We should go outside at least, so they can start cleaning up.”

Kara stood up and pushed her chair in, and you followed behind her doing the same. Right before Kara opened the door to leave, you glanced over at the worker behind the counter, and he gave you a shy smile and a small nod goodnight. The font on his nametag was too small to read as you walked by, so you couldn’t catch his name unfortunately. Too bad you couldn’t read it because he was really cute with his purple hair that fell over his eyes. However, his dimples were what attracted you to him the most because you had a weakness for guys with dimples. It made them 100 times cuter, and you strongly believed that it usually brought out the softer side in guys.

It was quite windy for a night in August, but the temperature outside caused you to warm up slowly. The perfectly round moon gleamed brightly against the pitch-black night sky while the stars faintly sparkled in the darkness above. The luster of the street lights provided some light and only a few cars remained in the parking lot.

“What should we do now? I don’t have anyone to call to pick us up, and I don’t have the number to call a cab either,” you stated. You looked down at the time on your phone, and it was getting later as the seconds ticked by. It was a good thing that school wasn’t going to start tomorrow because it looked like you weren’t going to get much sleep tonight.

“Most of my friends aren’t coming back until tomorrow, so we can either walk back or maybe someone will be nice enough to give us a ride,” she replied, as she fidgeted with the hem of her shirt. “I’m so sorry, y/n. I completely forgot that the buses don’t run after 8:30.”

“It’s okay,” you told her, while taking a seat on the sidewalk.

About fifteen minutes later, the worker with purple hair walked out of the shop and locked the door. He looked at you with a confused look on his face before walking away to his car. He wasn’t even halfway to his car yet when he spun around to face you and asked, “If you don’t mind me asking, why are you both still out here?”

“We took the bus here, but I forgot that they don’t run late,” Kara uttered before you even had a chance to say a word. The puzzled look on the guy’s face disappeared, and he appeared to be thinking.

“I know this may seem sketchy because you don’t know me, but would both of you like a ride back to campus? I live on campus, and it seems like the most logical thing to ask. You don’t have to agree; I completely understand if you don’t trust me since we just met,” he said, looking at your roommate and back to you as he patiently waited for an answer.

Your parents told you to never take rides from strangers, but in your opinion, he came across as a true gentleman and someone you could trust. However, you were gullible enough to believe anything people say, so you looked to your roommate to see what she had to say about his offer, and she gave you a short nod.

“Um, we’ll take the ride back with you to campus.” Your voice was unsteady, but there was nothing you could do to halt the nervousness from spreading throughout your whole body.

He nodded in agreement and motioned for you all to follow him to his car. “By the way, I’m Namjoon. Nice to meet you both.”

“Nice to meet you too. I’m y/n, and this is Kara,” you responded, while opening the door to his car.

On the first day of classes, you got lost trying to find the building your Fundamentals of Music Theory class was in. “I should have walked around more beforehand to familiarize myself with the campus,” you thought to yourself as you power walked across campus through the green, freshly mowed grass. Your calf muscles screamed in protest at the sudden strain, but there was no way that you could slow down and be late to class. Eventually making it with one minute to spare, you took the last open seat. The guy sitting in front of you looked very familiar with purple hair that you’ve seen before. Your eyes grew wide when you realized it was Namjoon. Thoughts ranging from “I wonder if he knows I’m sitting behind him” to “do I look good today?” raced in your mind, and you hoped he didn’t turn around at this very moment. If he did, he would see your cheeks blushing, and you probably would die a little inside.

When class ended, Namjoon turned around to get his book bag, and he acknowledged you with a smile. “Hey y/n. It’s nice to see you again.”

“Yeah, it’s nice to see you again too Namjoon, and I’m glad we have a class together. Kara and I are going to get lunch when she gets out of class. Would you like to join us?” you inquired shyly.

“Why not? I would love to, and I have a nice break between my classes.”

“Really? We can sit outside while we wait for her to finish,” you replied almost a little too eagerly. You found a metal bench for both of you to sit on in the cool shade away from the sun. “So, tell me about yourself because I would like to get to know you better.”

He thought diligently prior to speaking, as he carefully pondered about the words he was going to use. “Where should I begin? Let’s see, I am a sophomore majoring in music production, and after I graduate, I want to run my own studio production company. I fell in love with songwriting during my teenage years, and I try to allot time to write in my journal every single day. Now I have an urge to expand and learn how to produce and record. This is the stuff I’m passionate about, and I know that I’ll never want to stop making music. I live and breathe music, and it’s my life.” You saw the enthusiasm shine bright in Namjoon’s eyes as he spoke, and you never wanted him to quit talking about what he loved to do. “Now why don’t you tell me a little about yourself since I’ve talked quite a lot,” he asked. You wanted him to keep rambling on about his life because you could listen to him all day, but he insisted on asking about your life.

“I’m a freshman, and right now my major is undecided, but I think I want to study music education.” Your eyes drifted off of Namjoon to Kara as she walked out of the building she was in. She then saw you both sitting on a bench, so she strolled over with a smile on her face.

“Y/n, my stomach has been growling all throughout class today, so let’s get something for lunch,” she suggested before turning her body towards Namjoon. “Hey, Namjoon. It’s nice to see you again. How are you?” Kara spoke, her voice peppy and full of energy. You loved how delighted she always was because her personality boosted your mood up whenever she was around. It also became apparent that Namjoon had more interest in her than you, as it seemed like he was somewhat intimidated by you considering that he kept his distance even when you were next to him on the bench. Although he acted that way with you, he couldn’t keep his eyes off of Kara, and Kara surely couldn’t keep her eyes off of him.

Arising from the deep slumber from the night before, you felt well rested and energized, ready to begin your day. Rubbing your hands against your half-opened eyes to wake them up, the sun peeked through the thin curtains hanging from the window in your dorm, and the birds chirped happily; however, something felt off. Your gut told you there was something wrong, but you couldn’t put a finger on it. Shrugging it off without letting the thought ponder in your head a second time, you rolled out of bed and got ready for class. Quietly tiptoeing around the room trying to find clean clothes without waking your roommate was a challenge, but somehow you managed to find a pair of shorts and a matching shirt in the dim light. Neglecting to turn off your alarm since you woke up earlier than usual, the loud ringing began echoing off the paper-thin walls and revoked you from the dazed state you were in.

“Shit. Kara’s gonna kill me if I wake her up.” You quickly ran to your night table to turn off the alarm, almost stumbling over a pair of shoes. Fumbling with the buttons on the top, you succeeded in silencing the repetitive noise. Looking over at her still sleeping soundly, you were thankful that she didn’t hear your alarm. “Good, she’s still asleep.”

Grabbing a granola bar on the way out, you headed to your first class of the day. When it was time for lecture to begin, you diligently took notes since the professor could put any material on the exams. Halfway through class, the phone in your lap buzzed faintly against your legs. You looked down at the dimly lit screen and saw your dad’s contact picture light up. Usually when you received a call from your parents, it was from your worried mom instead of your dad, so this shot immediate red flags in your mind. “What could be happening that my dad is calling me? He never texts me, let alone calls me,” you pondered to yourself.

The professor dragged out the lecture for as long as possible, but the only thing you could do was watch the call go to voicemail since you couldn’t be disrespectful and pick up the call right then and there. Hopefully, the call was just a check-in to see how you were adjusting to college life, so you shrugged it off. Once class ended, you hurriedly packed your bookbag and headed for the door. Your thumb shook nervously as you pressed the home button to unlock your phone, and your head flooded with unwanted thoughts. Light rain hit your bare face as you stepped outside, so you quickened your pace back to your dorm. On the walk back, you hit play on the voicemail and put the phone up to your ear to hear what your dad had to say. Before the voicemail could even end, tears immediately formed and gushed down your face. You couldn’t believe it, so you replayed the voicemail to make sure you heard correctly.

“Your mom and I went to the doctor, and we found out that she has stage IV pancreatic cancer. She never showed symptoms, and that’s why the cancer was caught so late. She only has six months to live.”

Six months. 180 days. That is all the time you had left with your mom, and you could not believe what you heard from your dad. It seemed unreal; one day she seemed healthy, the next she had stage IV cancer. You kept pinching yourself over and over because you yearned to wake up from this tragic nightmare. Nothing worked, and you were stuck living in this bad dream. You burst through your door and ran straight to your bed to bury your teary face into your soft pillow. You were too distressed to even shut your door, but you didn’t care who saw you cry. Rummaging through your bag, you blindly felt around for a package of tissues. Pulling a tissue out, you patted your eyes and wiped your nose. Unzipping your jacket pocket, you took out your phone to call your dad back for answers. You heard the phone ring twice before a familiar voice was heard.

“Hey babe,” your dad answered the phone.

“Hey Dad. How’s Mom doing?” you frantically asked, hoping for answers.

“She’s a little shook up by the news today, and I took off work for the rest of the day, so I can be by her side to comfort her.”

“How can she have cancer? She seemed fine when I moved into my dorm, and now this is happening. I don’t understand.”

“I don’t understand it much either, but the doctor explained that pancreatic cancer is usually diagnosed at a late stage because symptoms don’t really show up beforehand in the earlier stages.”

“Are there any treatments she can try? There has to be something we can do.”

“The doctor gave us some options to check out - chemotherapy, palliative pain treatments, and palliative surgery. We’re leaning towards chemo, but we aren’t positive with our decision yet. I know you’re worried about Mom, but please don’t stress over this. Focus on your studies, and enjoy your first semester in college. Everything will be okay; don’t worry. I love you, sweetheart.” Your dad tried his best to reassure you, but there wasn’t much he could say to make you feel better.

“I love you too. Bye, and tell Mom that I love her.” Too tired to hold back tears, you ended the call and closed your eyes to escape the pain.

“Y/n, wake up. You’ve been asleep for almost the whole day now.” Kara said worriedly as she shook your shoulder. You blinked hard twice to wake up your drowsy eyes. Your eyes and cheeks were still puffy from all the crying earlier, and your head felt cloudy, as if you couldn’t think straight. She looked at you with soft eyes for a second until she sat next to you on the bed. You sat up to say something but nothing left your opened mouth, so you stared at the foot of your bed instead.

“It’s okay if you don’t want to talk about whatever is bothering you. I’m here for you always. If you just want someone to hug, I’m also here for that.” You hesitated for a moment before holding out your arms, and Kara leaned in to envelop you in a hug. It was too hard to stay strong through all of this by yourself, and before you knew it, a single tear slid down your face slowly until multiple tears chased after one another. Removing your head off of her shoulder, you looked at the sleeve of her shirt now stained with your tears.

Breaking apart from her welcoming embrace and wiping your eyes with the collar of your shirt, you asked shyly, “Can I tell you the news? I need to get it off my chest because it’s been weighing me down.” Kara nodded her head yes and sat in silence as a signal for you to continue. “Today after class I got a voicemail from my dad, and he said that my mom has stage IV cancer. She doesn’t have much longer to live. I, I…” Before you could even finish your sentence, you were already sobbing as words were muffled into your hands. Kara quickly ran to grab a tissue and then came back to your side to comfort your shaky body. As both of you sat in calming silence on your bed, you appreciated the support from your roommate because there was no way that you could suffer through this nightmare alone.

Lost deep in thought in the beautiful world you created for yourself to escape the heartache of reality, you were immersed in picking at the chipped red polish on your left thumb until Kara interrupted you to bring you back down to earth. “Let’s go pick up dinner and hang out with some friends to get your mind off this. I can text Namjoon to see what he’s up to because it’s been a while since the three of us hung out together.”

“Yeah, I guess so,” you said reluctantly, while hanging your feet off the bed until they reached the ground, and you leaned over to put your shoes back on.

Each day after classes, you called your mom to hear her voice no matter what time it was because you never knew when she would breathe her last breath. This was the toughest part for you, even more challenging than all your schoolwork, because every time you heard her weak “I love you” near the end of your call, it tugged at your heartstrings until you were on the verge of balling your eyes out. Since you were the type of person that craved for being in control over your life, you hated knowing your mother’s death was in the near future, yet no matter what you did, nothing would change the course of her life.

Pulling into the driveway of your parents’ small, cozy home, your dad eagerly waved to you while leaning on the handle of the stationary lawn mower. The unkempt grass of the front yard buried him ankle deep as weeds decorated the yard. The weeks away from home when you were at college, made you appreciate being home more even if your stay was just for the weekend. You missed having homemade meals, sleeping in your soft bed in your own room, having your pets around, and spending quality time with your family. As soon as you parked your car in the garage, you hopped out and ran to give your dad a bear hug, not caring about the sweat dripping from his face. His tight squeeze of welcoming you back home took the breath out of your chest, but you didn’t mind because you missed him dearly.

Quietly opening the door in the garage, you didn’t want to awaken your mom if she was resting on the couch in the living room. Peeking around the corner of the wall, you saw her chest rise and fall with every breath she took as she rested with her eyes closed. With her breathing barely audible, the hum of the television filled the silent room.

“Y/n? Is that you?” your mom questioned with her eyes still shut.

Startled by her question, your body jumped slightly, and your eyes grew wide, but the darkness camouflaged your reaction. You didn’t think she was awake, but she heard the opening and closing of the door. “Yes, Mom. It’s me. Do you need anything?”

“No, I just want you to sit, and talk to me.”

Walking over to the couch where she was lying, you took a seat on the floor next to her and rested your head on her shoulder. “How are you feeling? I hope you feel okay, and I’m sorry that I can’t be here more often.”

“Honey, don’t feel sorry. I love that you come home every weekend to be with me. That means so much to me, and I love you.” Taking a couple of deep breaths, she continued on with your question, “I’m feeling all right. I’m mainly tired by lunchtime, but your dad takes very good care of me. I do feel weaker now than when I did when I first found out, but that is nothing to be worried about, sweetie. You already have a lot to be stressed over with classes, so please do not be concerned about me.”

Choking back tears, you turned your head away from her view, hoping she missed your watery eyes. “It hurts me to see you in pain. I know you don’t voice it, but I can still see it in your eyes.” Your voice cracked as the words left your mouth, and that was when the sobs took over. “Why is this happening? I don’t know what I’m going to do without you. You’re my- ”

“Y/n, y/n. I know you’re upset, but try to stay strong for me. Can you do that for me? Stay strong now, and stay strong later. I told your dad that exact same thing because I caught him crying before bed a few times.”

Thinking of the future, you know you’ll ache for times like these when you enjoyed your mom’s company. You’d miss the connection you felt with her without having to speak a single word for her to understand. You loved your dad to pieces and appreciated everything he did for you and your family, but it was not the same. He wasn’t your best friend.

The months of your semester flew by faster than ever. In the blink of an eye, it was already finals week, and you clearly remembered the first day of classes like it was yesterday. Since you were a freshman, you mainly took general classes this first semester, so finals weren’t anything you were too terrified about. Christmas break was right around the corner, and the excitement of being home for a month grew in your stomach. The only thing that stood in your way of being free for a whole month was four finals and a paper.

“Do you need help unloading the tree?” you asked your dad.

“No, I think I have it if you’ll open the door,” he stated. With the Christmas tree blocking his view, he diligently stared at the ground until he made his way to the living room. After stabilizing the tree carefully into the stand, your dad slowly backed away with his arms spread out to the side, taking preliminary measures in case the tree tipped over. “Y/n, did you get the water?”

“Yes, I have it right here,” you replied, crouching down to pour the water into the metal basin. “Before we decorate, we need to place a tree skirt around the stand to hide it.” Searching through the boxes of Christmas decorations, your dad found the skirt hiding at the bottom of the box.

“The tree looks nice! I think this one is perfect one for us,” your mom paused to take a deep breath in, and then she continued, “And there’s nothing better than the smell of a real Christmas tree.” With her hands on her hips, she took a step back to admire the tree fitting nicely in the corner of the room.

“Y/n picked it out herself. She found a hidden gem towards the back of the farm, while I only found small ones that weren’t that pretty.”

“Yeah, I was about to give up on my search, but then I stumbled across this one at the last minute. It’s funny how once I stopped looking, I found a good tree,” you chuckled. “I’ll be back in a second. I need to get my speaker to play some music.” While walking to your room, you shuffled through your playlists on your phone to find some Christmas music. Once you got back to the living room, you turned on “Joy to the World” for background music and made your way over to the stack of boxes that your parents were already digging through. With help from your dad, you strung the lights around the tree carefully, as to not tangle them up, while your mom sat in a chair next to the boxes and tapped her foot to the beat of the music. When that was finished, you took the ornaments one by one from your mom, carefully hanging them up where they looked best.

“Y/n, remember this ornament? This is your handprint from kindergarten. I still can’t believe you’re all grown and in college now,” your mom said, reminiscing about memories of you at the age of five.

“My hand was so small compared to it now. It’s so weird how much I’ve grown,” you exclaimed when you compared your hand to the handprint.

“Ah, those were the days. I’m proud of the beautiful, young lady you’ve become,” your mom gushed.

“Me too,” your dad chimed in, agreeing with your mom while flashing you a grin.

Sitting cross-legged on the foot of the hard bed in the hospital room with your dad standing next to you, the deafening silence rang loudly into your ears. Blank walls stared back at you, and the cold air from the window crack brushed lightly on your right shoulder. Nothing but sadness permeated the stillness of the air. Your dad nodded his head toward your mom with a solemn look plastered on his face, and when he turned to face you, you saw the identical distressed and suffering signs that you were feeling. He squeezed her hand tightly one last time. This pain intensified by the second, but you promised to stay strong through all of this. Your dad and you both promised. “Thank you for everything. I couldn’t have asked for a better life. I love both of you,” your mom whispered unhurriedly as she closed her eyes one last time. You couldn’t recall the exact time she breathed in her final breath, but you did notice how peaceful her face and body appeared to be. She wasn’t suffering anymore, and she was lastly in a place where she could be pain free. While getting up to leave the hospital room, you caught a glimpse of a small, white butterfly squeezing its way in from the tiny crack in the window and landing on the foot of the bed.

It was tough for you to admit that life was harder without your mom, yet you felt empty and believed that there was no purpose anymore. You dreaded waking up every morning because this meant another day of desolation, and you hated that feeling. You wanted more time to talk to her, to hug her, and to be around her.

Only a month after the funeral, you found yourself staring into the vast dark ocean as you stood on the edge of a cliff. The harsh waves crashed down below onto the black rocks that embellished the shore. The gray clouds blocked the sun from radiating onto the water, and there was a chilly breeze that nipped at your bare skin through the small holes in your sweater. You closed your eyes and took a deep breath in to reflect about everything that had recently happened in your family and knew your decision was final. Nervously, you took a few steps back as your mind began to race, and your body began to shake. Shutting your eyes tight once more, you thought to yourself, “Just jump, and the pain will be gone.” On the count of three, you hesitantly ran, only to stop yourself right before you leaped off the cliff because in the corner of your eye, you noticed a white butterfly flutter by. That butterfly appeared to be the same kind as the one in the hospital room before your mom’s death. Your body trembled in shock as you stared at it and finally realized that everything would be all right in the end. This was a sign from your mom, and you remembered that she wanted you to stay strong for her, so you did just that. Still fatigued from the near death experience, you ambled away from the edge of the cliff to sit down and regain your strength. Wrapping your arms around your knees, you placed your head on your arms and unlocked your phone to check the missed messages and calls.

Kara: Where are you? You weren’t here when I woke up. [8:42 am]

Kara: Are you skipping class? [8:50 am]

Kara: You never skip class. I’m worried. [8:57 am]

Kara: And you always answer your phone fast. This isn’t like you. [8:59 am]

 [ (15) missed calls from Kara ]

Namjoon: Are you okay?? You wanna talk? [9:13 am]

 [ (2) missed calls from Namjoon ]

Dad: I hope you have a good day. I love you babe. [9:47 am]

With the last bit of energy you had left, you took the time to reply to their messages and let them know where you were at the moment. Then you pressed the off button to lock your phone.

The sun peeked out from behind the scattered clouds, and the warm beams hit your face, which made you squint to see out into the distance. Oblivious to the sounds of the footsteps getting louder behind you, you flinched at the repeated tap on your shoulder. Turning around with a shocked look on your face, you saw an angelic man standing two feet away from you, lips curled into a beautiful smile. He wasn’t like anyone you had met before in your life. This time was different, and your gut told you this man was special. His golden skin radiated from his slim body similar to the way the sun beamed down onto the Earth, and his beauty blinded you. His ethereal beauty and allure made you doubt his existence because he couldn’t be real. He was too perfect to be real. To you, he couldn’t be less of an angel. Unconsciously your mouth dropped open slightly, and your eyes grew wide before he brought you back down to earth.

Flashing a big grin back at you, he replied, “Don’t worry about that. You’re good.” Ruffling his hand through his jet-black hair, his bangs fell across his forehead and covered his eyebrows. “I’m Hoseok. What’s your name?”

“Hoseok, Hoseok, Hoseok,” you repeated his name over and over in your head trying to imprint his voice into your brain because the way his words rolled smoothly off his tongue made butterflies flutter in your stomach. Too shy to bring your gaze up to his, you stared at the ground while smiling to yourself. Eventually finding the courage to meet his eyes, you noticed that they were a rich chocolate brown with flecks of gold that glistened even in the dim light. “I’m y/n. It’s nice to meet you.”

He seemed to be thinking carefully before he responded. “Y/n. That’s a lovely name.”

You couldn’t help the grin from spreading across your face as you heard your name glide off his tongue like velvet, and gladly, there wasn’t anything to be timid about because he beamed right back at you in response.

There was no explanation to why Hoseok was here at the same time you were because the spot you chose was usually isolated from the general population as only a handful of people knew about this location. None of the pieces added up, so you were genuinely confused.

“Y/n! Look at all these butterflies flying around us. I’ve never seen so many of these in one place before!” Hoseok twirled around with his arms in the air before bouncing around in attempt to cup one in his hands. You giggled with laughter at how amusing he was acting and how he was already comfortable with you from the start. Prior to joining him in catching butterflies, you lifted your head up to the sky and mouthed a silent “thank you.”

College and Coffee Shops - Gyuhao

Words: 1043

Genre: Fluff

Summary: Minghao’s a sleep deprived chemistry major and Mingyu’s the new barista at the college coffee shop.

A/N: This was such a cute prompt and I’m really tempted definitely going to do a part two.

College was, to put it lightly, a place borne from the very depths of hell, so bad in fact that it had been cast out of the abyss of the Underworld and left to rot in the world of mortals for even the most maleficent of demons couldn’t hold a candle to its ever looming dread. Well, at least it seemed that way to an extremely sleep deprived and befuddled Minghao who awoke to sunlight streaming in the window of his dorm and a crick in his neck from falling asleep at his desk with his chemistry notes for pillow.

He groaned. He hadn’t meant to doze off; the last thing he remembered was being scared shitless for his chemistry final and resolving to pull an all nighter in a futile attempt to cram the knowledge of the entire last semester into a short six hours. Like that was going to work. For about the millionth time since he had arrived at Pledis University two years ago, he cursed himself for choosing a major with such a high course load. Not to mention that his professor was an old geezer who was the only person capable of a beginning a lecture about the nature of oxidation-reduction reactions only to find himself an hour later lost in tales of the types of bar establishments he used to frequent when he was, to put it in his terms, “young and stupid like you all.” So of course, Minghao was left to teach himself one of the hardest classes on campus, all while stuck in a dorm room with quite possibly the sassiest drama major to ever set foot at Pledis.

Don’t get him wrong, Minghao adored Seungkwan, but the latter had a tendency to be just a little bit over exuberant. Especially at odd hours in the morning when Minghao was catching up on much needed sleep or trying to finish an essay on time. Speaking of his roommate– Minghao craned his neck to peer around his, for once, nearly silent dorm. Almost immediately, he spotted one of Seungkwan’s favorite pink post it notes on the door. Groaning a bit, he stood up to retrieve it.

Have a lecture until 9:30 today. Could you get me coffee for when I get back?

Minghao glanced at the clock, which read 9:02 AM. Deciding he might as well grab coffee for himself too (he needed it after last night), Minghao slipped on his favorite pair of ratty converse and tugged on a simple white t-shirt over his faded jeans. Running his hand through his chocolate locks, he gave himself a once over in the full length mirror near the door. He looked like a zombie from that Walking Dead show that Seungkwan was always watching, but figuring that the majority of the student body would probably be sporting read, bleary eyes for the next week or two, he grabbed his dorm key from the hook and walked out the door.

The campus coffee shop was a relatively short walk away, situated in a cozy nook next to the library and overlooking the quad, which was significantly less crowded than usual. As he entered the quaint cafe, he was greeted by the tinkling of a bell somewhere overhead and the the aroma of his favorite fresh ground coffee. He approached the counter, desperately trying to remember whether or not Seungkwan took cream in his order, when he noticed a new face among the otherwise familiar coffee house staff. Minghao didn’t really know what it was about him, perhaps the boundless energy and positivity he seemed to radiate despite the dread had settled on campus with finals week, or maybe the way the way he could effortlessly pull off the barista get up, but whatever the reason, Minghao instantly knew he liked him.

Mingyu read his name tag, and the corners of Minghao’s mouth turned up slightly has he rolled the name across his tongue. It fit the dude, he decided, and, releasing a breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding in, Minghao stepped up to order from the alluring stranger.

“Morning, what can I get you today?” Mingyu said with a smile that was somehow even more electrifying when up close.

“Could I get a caramel macchiato and whatever drink you have that has the most caffeine?”

“Finals?” Mingyu looked at Minghao with a sympathetic smile on his face, quickly ringing up the order.

Minghao grimaced and nodded, unable to fully meet the barista’s eyes. “You have no idea. Chemistry can be a real pain in the ass.”

“Oh damn dude, I can only imagine. I’ve heard nothing but horror stories about the chem professor. I’ll have your order out for you as quick as I can.”

Minghao smiled gratefully as Mingyu disappeared somewhere into the back to make his drink before taking a seat in the corner of the cafe. He idly scrolled through his twitter, his thoughts still firmly possessed by the barista boy. Needless to say, Minghao foresaw a lot more visits to the coffee shop in the coming weeks.

A few minutes had ticked by, when, suddenly, someone cleared their throat in front of him. Startled, Minghao looked up. He was met by the beaming face of Mingyu, who held two steaming drinks in his outstretched arms.

“Did someone order a caramel macchiato and caffeine with a hint of coffee?” Mingyu asked with a lilt of teasing in his tone.

Minghao cracked a grin and reached out to take the cups. “Thanks man, I really appreciate it.”

“Anytime. Come back and see me anytime you’re planning on pulling another all nighter.”

“For sure.”

It wasn’t until after Mingyu had headed back behind the counter with a small wave of his hand that Minghao noticed that there was something written on his cup. Curious, he brought it to eye level, and peered at the words scribbled in a distinct and loopy font, that was so utterly Mingyu.

Don’t sweat it, you’re going to do Fluorine, Iodine, and Neon on that chemistry final. Fighting! - Mingyu

Minghao exited the cafe with a new spring in his step, significantly less terrified of the trials and tribulations to come.

Forever and Always

hey! how about a Matthew imagination? based on what Matthew said about what he’d like in a girl? you know, holiday decoration, butterfly kisses in the morning etc.?

Can you write more MGG ones?

I just read your mgg’ now! I really liked it Could you write more?

(of course my lovelies! I just really hope that i’m portraying Matthew correctly. I know of some writers who say they don’t write actor fics because they don’t want to offend the person they’re writing about and it really makes me feel guilty and conflicted.)

(also some of these are relatively short)

Part 1

(You don’t really need to read part 1 to understand this part.)


When first we touched,

My heart flew high,

You were a hair and makeup designer for the set on Criminal Minds, proud with yourself of the fantastic job you do everyday being Shemar’s “savior” s he like to put it.

Today, when you came into work, you were puzzled to find out that you were going to be Matthew Gray Gubler’s Make-up artist. Apparently it had to do with Shemar not being in the episode. Usually that would mean you have the day off, but it seemed that another artist was sick so you had to fill in. you were a little nervous. you had never done make-up for Matthew before.

You were skilled obviously, and knew how to do your job so it wouldn’t be a problem, it’s just…to put it simply…you thought he was the best character. Of course you loved Shemar/Morgan, but Spencer’s entire character fascinated you. First his mom, being kidnapped, his headaches, Meave, etc. You just couldn’t help but fangirl.

You stood nervously as you entered Matthew’s dressing room, a shy smile on your face once your (e/c) eyes met his teak-colored ones.

“Hi! I’m Matthew Gray Gubler! You’re my temporary make-up artist for the day?” He stood up from his chair in front of his mirror, holding out his hand politely. He flashed you his ever-sincere smile, making his whole face light up. You returned the handshake, hand soft and slightly shaking. “Nervous? Don’t be. You do such a great job with Shemar’s make-up that I’m sure you’ll do wonders with me.”

A soft blush crept up your cheeks, and you exhaled a gentle sigh. His pleasantly calloused hand slowly left yours, and you felt a bit more calm around him.“I’m y/n.”

You immediately got to work, curling his short hair, making sure it was evenly trimmed where it needed to be. Then you started applying Make-up,  enhancing his face, making his cheek bones and jaw line stand out, lips full and lush, and eyes pop. You took a few steps backwards and put your finger on your chin, pondering for a moment. Matthew just looked at you, curious.

“Alright, I’ve done everything in my power, but I’m afraid you’re just hopeless.” You teased, turning his chair around so he could view himself in the mirror. His eyes looked appreciative, and he stood up so he could shake your hand once more. “Thank you y/n.” You smiled, shooing him away.

“You’re welcome, you’re welcome, now go to wardrobe! You’ve got to be on set in 30 minutes!” You chuckled as he gave you a goofy grin and walked away. That wasn’t as bad as you thought.


Over time, Matthew began to ‘bother’ you while you were doing Shemar’s make-up, getting to the set early to get his done earlier. He wasn’t really bothering you, just distracting you. Shemar knew how to play Morgan well, teasing you two all the time until he finally got Matthew to ask you out. It was a sweet and gentle relationship.

“Just remember Matthew, she’s still my make-up artist. She might one day fall for me.” Shemar like to to joke with Matthew who scoffed, waving the comment off. “Oh please, she’ll fall in love with her excellent work on enhancing your face. I’m too flawless for the amount they have to cake on your face every morning.” He would reply.

On gossamer wings through a cloudless sky.

They said it was built upon a lie.

They told me my feelings would surely fade.

Passion would flare and foes would be made.

You smiled as you and your boyfriend posed on a red carpet, entering a classy event he had been invited to. Making your way inside, you tried not to trip over the new heels you were wearing, feeling slightly insecure. This was the first time you had attended something important with your boyfriend. You were glad you guys were just going to be hanging out with Matthew’s cast members.

You were pretty familiar with some of them, so you weren’t too nervous. As you both were making your way to the table you had been assigned, some fans came up and asked for a picture with Matthew. He gave you a look, silently asking if you wouldn’t mind. You shook our head, stepping out of the frame and standing next to a couple people who didn’t seem to know you were there, based on what they said after the picture had been taken.

“God he’s so hot.” One of them said.

“I know. Too bad he’s with y/n.” Another sighed.

“So? That relationship’s honestly going nowhere. I bet you he’s only dating her so he doesn’t have to date the crazy famous women. Although their looks would compliment him more.” They laughed.

You stood for a few moments, not quite sure what to do until tears started to prick in your eyes. You looked up and saw Matthew, smiling and being cheerful with his fans. It killed you to know that some of Matthew’s fans thought of you that way. Maybe you were dragging him down? You saw more people coming up to pose with him and you took that as your cue to leave.

You panted as you reached a courtyard behind the building, blooming with flowers and vines, sitting on the edge of a fountain. You hated to make a big deal out of this, but you had never thought about this until now. What if the negative attention you were getting from his fans transferred onto him? Would he lose his job? You didn’t know.

You sat there crying for a couple minutes when you heard Matthew call out your name. You tried to stay quiet but your breathy sobs rang out throughout the yard.

“Y/n? What are you doing out here? Why are you crying?” He asked, coming to kneel in front of you. You told him about your insecurities, and what some of the fans had said. You loved him so much, you were willing to do everything and anything for this man. “Y/n. It doesn’t matter what a couple of petty fans said. I love you, and that’s all that matters. Okay?”

“Okay.” you sniffed, wiping your face and smiling softly, letting him drag you back into the gala.

Can you not put the pass behind?

True love can change a rivers course,

“Y/n?” You heard Matthew call from his living room, you in your office he had given to you when you moved in together. He had ben reading, you shuffling through the new script you had been given. Even though you were an actor on the show, they had created a plot so you could be excused for a few episodes in order to film a movie you had been offered.


“Could you come in here for a moment?” Your brows furrowed but you complied, heading down the stairs to meet him. When you stepped in to the living room you were greeted by the sight of Mathew surrounded with Hershey’s Kisses wrappers. You smiled knowingly as he held up a paper wrapper, instead of the usual blue font saying, “kisses” it said “redeemable for 1 kiss”.

“What are these?” He asked.

“Did you read them?” You teased, moving a mountain of silver with your foot. He rolled his eyes playfully at you, picking a couple more up. “They’re coupons. For you.”

“Are they only for one use per day?” He asked, brow raising wickedly. You shook your head and immediately felt his lips attack your face with kisses. You squealed, wrapping your arms behind Matthew’s neck.

“What are you doing?” You giggled.

“Well,” He spoke in-between kisses. “I figure there’s about 30 kiss coupons here… And I want to cash them all in now.”

Or pierce the strongest vault with ease.

True love can turn coal into gold,

“Matthew?” You called, trying to look around for your boyfriend. You couldn’t find him anywhere, so you decided to look by his desk, where he usually hung out. Instead of his usual clutter, his desk was completely neat except for a jar filled with little slips of paper. Puzzled, you opened it, looking through each slip.

Your smile

Your laugh

The way the sun shines through your hair

The way you put up with all my silliness

Your eyes

Your kisses

The way your hand fits perfectly into mine

The way you love candlelight

Everything about you

There were dozens of more little slips in the jar, and you then realized it was labeled. “Things I Love about You, Y/n.” Somebody coughed behind you, and you knew it had to be Matthew.

Turning back around you saw him smiling sheepishly and holding a bouquet of your favorite flowers.

“Why?” You asked softly, a goofy smile overtaking your face.

“Do I really need a reason to show my girlfriend all the reasons I love her?” He gave you a pointed look, making you shake your head. “Good.” He kissed you passionately, whispering into your ear after you pulled away, “That’s not the only jar by the way.”

Or tame the tempest to a balmy breeze.

Quite some time has passed since then:

People no longer criticize,

For now they see that truth exists,

It was noisy, crowded, and sweaty. In other words, perfect.

You and the whole CM gang were in Los Angeles for a Panel, and all of you were having a blast. You were only an hour in, but you were loving some of the questions that your friends were being asked. Suddenly a voice caught our attention

.“Y/n! I absolutely love your character on Criminal Minds! Spencer totally deserved love after Meave, and you were the perfect fit! I can’t believe you both are dating in real life as well!” You turned to look at Matthew, hand already holding yours.

“Me neither.” He smiled, kissing your cheeks.

Where once there might have been only lies.

Still my feelings are the same today,

“I do.”

“I do.”

“You may now kiss the bride.”

As they were on that very first,

For when we touch, my heart still flies,

on gossamer wings through cloudless skies.

I'd Rather Stay in Bed With You

J-Hope request by sugacookie6: “Next time, when the time is right, I would like a J-Hope scenario of us waking up in the morning. HEHE!! That would be SOOOO CUTE!!! ( ›◡ु‹ )”


The warmness of Hoseok’s body heated the heavy duvet you were snuggles into, and though it was cold around you, you felt warm and fuzzy when cuddling into his chest. His arm was securely wrapped around your waist and it was hot. Almost like a heater that was softly holding you to his chest. Hoseok’s breathing was light and slow, and you took some moments to feel his chest gently rising against your head, up and down, up and down.

You stretched your arms and upper body within the little room you had, meanwhile looking at the clock. 30 minutes left until you needed to wake up. You wanted to return to the sweet slumber you just had but unfortunately you had been fully awaken by now, and there’s no way back now.

Instead of getting up earlier, you decided to admire your lovely boyfriend. Since you didn’t have anything better to do anyways, you started to gently rub his chest.  He was still sleeping soundlessly, just like a baby. His lips were slightly parted and his eyelashes were long and soft. You took a moment to engulf his sleeping image; peaceful and beautiful.

The way his soft breaths hit your face when you gently got up on your elbows to face his face better just couldn’t be any sweeter, and therefore you just had to touch his smooth cheek. You moved your finger over his forehead, barely touching and traveling your fingers on it, then to his nose and lips, pulling his bottom one down until he moaned softly, almost waking up. You smirked as his eyebrows frowned slightly and kissed his cheek a few times.

Hoseok then turned you over so that now he was lying on top of you. His head was buried in the crook of your neck, sending his hot breaths to tickle your skin. You laughed when he shook his head over your neck and grunted tiredly “Why…?”

“It’s not funny.” He looked seriously into your eyes and you erased your smile for a second until he started planting sweet kisses all over your face. you giggled and stroked his hair when he stopped, and he, took the chance and laid his head on your chest once again. “Let’s just go back to sleep…”

“But I need to get up in about 20 minutes.”



Hoseok looked up and stared at you fiercely. “I said no.” then he rolled over and pulled you close to him, securing his strong arms around your body to make sure you couldn’t leave his hold. “You’re not leaving.”

“B-But Hoseokkie…” you laughed, “I have to…”  


“I’ll make you pancakes.”

He stared at you in interest, raising an eyebrow and after a long minute he nodded. “Sounds good enough for me.” You laughed at him and he took your hands to plant small loving kisses on them. Then, you rolled on top of him and gave him a warm long kiss.

“I don’t wanna leave bed…” he whined. You looked at him, smiling, “But you have to.”

“Can’t I just cuddle with you? Let’s cuddle ____-ah…” he sleepily rubbed his eyes and pouted. You kissed him sweetly and then sighed, giving up on convincing the stubborn man next to you that it’ll be time to wake up soon. “Fine, just ten more minutes. Then we’re getting ready.” You said and laid on top of his warm chest. Hoseok wrapped his arms tightly around your back and said “Or the rest of the morning.”

“Hoseok…” you whined, trying to get away of his hold but he was way too strong. “If you’re going to stay in bed forever the manager will scold you.”

Hoseok then looked into your eyes and sleepily smiled his wide lovely smile, “I’d rather stay in bed with you.”