i think my problem is that i have always been way into my stories

It is what it is

I’m just so happy with this season finale. I just couldn’t wait more, as usual since we’re talking about BBC Sherlock.

THANK YOU Moffat and Gatiss for creating such a love story, and by saying love I mean it in its deepest way. Love, after all, is what save us all, and it’ll always be. Because when I started to watch this series, I saw this man:

lonely, risking his own life just because he was bored and didn’t think that the world had something prepared for him. He couldn’t even remember he had a brother, a best friend who died because Mycroft didn’t even let him do that, to have a memory of what love really is. And then when John arrives we have the same brother remembering Sherlock that “caring is not an advantage” (and let me hate Mycroft just a bit for that, though I really like him). And now we have this:

With his family, as he said, happy with his little pretty life, surrounded by the love of his friends and taking care of them.

I know what we all expected… I don’t want anyone to misunderstand this, I’m a “Johnlock fan”, my heart is with them since I don’t conceive a world where they’re not canon (at least in the world that Moffat and Gatiss created). It’s just that… this end was perfect. I can live without a kiss, without marriage or anything, just because this, in my opinion, is real love, and no one can deny it. They’re living together, with their daughter (yes, because I don’t think this image of Sherlock playing with Rosie is a shitty uncle thing, just look at him, look at them!), solving cases, they’ve said everything to each other, and there’s no need to put a name to that relationship. It is what it is, they have told us.

You know, for me, in my life, I found that love is something you cannot name, something more powerful than anything, and we just can’t look at it directly. We just can feed it, with our passion, take care of it, with our actions everyday, but never get the “perfect” love, the romantic love is a lie. Love is not a simple date, a kiss or a present; it is desire, union, honesty. I don’t think they’re “just best friends”, but I also don’t think they’re “a couple”. Because they don’t need either. They just live their love as they can, letting it into their souls. That, I think, is the most beautiful and powerful action a human being can do for his own life, and the ones he loves. Sherlock let love in, we saw it, we saw the process. I don’t mind what they call it… Jesus, they don’t mind. And we have evidence of that, we heard that from them. They don’t have to have an annyversary, or a wedding, they just have to live together, doing what gives their lives sense. Just look at them and tell me you don’t see that, I dare you. Because is all that I see, and it’s not too little, it’s not meaningless, it’s not weak.

Sherlock could let go Moriarty, he could see who his brother really is, he found friends, he understood that we’re all just humans, even him, even John. And since we are, we must live with love and for it.

Everything, since the beggining, bring us to this. The final problem. And I’m just so happy of being part of it, watching here at home, this was awesome and I learned a lot. I just hope someday I can create something like this, something that reaches people’s hearts. Sherlock reached mine, so thank the world so much for that.

I think I’m finally able to articulate what’s bugging me so much about Shaw as a YCP ambassador. 

I remember when he got suspended for using that homophobic slur, and how angry I’d been. But I also remember a story about a reporter from Chicago who was openly gay, who Shaw had always been kind to. I cannot for the life of me find the article now, so you’ll have to take my word for it, but Shaw made an extra effort to seek out that reporter afterwards and apologize, knowing that his words would have hurt him. The reporter went on to write about how he truly believed that Shaw didn’t have a problem with the LGBT community; he just needed a lesson in awareness of how words can hurt. 

Now, Shaw wants to make amends for what he’s done. I think that’s great. I’m a huge believer in the ability of a person to grow and realize the error of their ways and change for the better. That all said, this is not the way to do it

The incident is still fresh in everyone’s minds, and from the apology until now, Shaw has done absolutely nothing to convince us he’s changed. And yet, here he is, openly expressing welcome for any teammate to approach him should they ever need it. I’m inclined to believe Shaw is genuine in this, and that he is trying to be a better person. But we haven’t SEEN that from him yet. An open invite to talk is just words. It hasn’t proven anything. I think, if Shaw had actually taken some initiative to provide support for the LGBT community before this, like attend a pride parade for example, then the situation would be different. But he hasn’t done anything like that. Shaw doesn’t feel safe to talk to just yet. And he probably won’t until he proves it some other way. Just because he wants to be approached doesn’t mean he will be, or that he will even be seen as approachable. And at the end of the day, it’s not about what he wants; it’s about what’s best for the LGBT players

So: I think it’s fantastic that Shaw wants to help and support LGBT athletes through YCP. I think it can be proof that a person can learn from their mistakes and fight back against the rampant homophobia inherent in the culture of the league. But he hasn’t proven anything yet, and until he does, he’s not a safe bet for the LGBT community. 

usachavez  asked:

every time i hear "treat people how you wanna be treated" it is always ALWAYS said to marginalized groups and never at their oppressors. what a waste of a motherfucking platform, mark.

I want to tell a story here.

when I was very little, my mother focused all her moral teachings on being empathetic, focusing on things like, when someone would do something that hurt me, when I wanted to do something to get back at them, she’d stop me and ask me how I would feel if I had done that to them, and ask me to think about what their motives might have been (aka, did they hurt me on purpose or was it an accident) and her number one lesson was “treat others the way you want to be treated”.

which I stuck to for years, until one day I finally came home in tears and asked my mother if it was ok for me to defend myself.

what she didn’t know was that I had been being horribly bulled by all my classmates (being in special ed for my learning disabilities caused the kids to basically see me leave and then come back later and coloring when they were all doing work, not knowing I’d been given one of those ‘do the math problems, the answers are the key to color in the picture’ things) and the stress from their relentless teasing was affecting me physically.

my mother had never realized that even in the face of being bullied, I had continued to “treat them the way I wanted to be treated”, which in their eyes, had turned me into a doormat.

in the end, she apologized to me for doing that to me, and said to instead treat others the way I want to be treated until they show me they aren’t worthy of it.

or as most know it, “do no harm but take no shit”

which imo, is a much better idea to live by.

My Fatal Flaw, as an INFJ

Nothing is truer than an infj’s ability to see the potential in each individual. We have a tendency to look at people as their whole story, not just who they are in the moment. We consider everything that went into making people the way they are…from our significant others to family members to strangers on the street. We do it with everyone, without even really meaning to. That’s just how we see people.

One thing I’m unsure of, however, is how good for us that is. I have a terrible problem of falling in love with people for the way they COULD be.

Yes, I know they COULD live up to my high standards, but that doesn’t mean they will. In every relationship I’ve ever been in, it’s always been a constant struggle trying to help them see that they have that potential within them, and it’s only a matter of working towards it. It’s not that I expect people to perfect. I don’t at all. I just expect people to constantly be trying as hard as I am to become a better version of myself. Because that’s what I’m always doing.

I honestly feel hopeless sometimes that I’ll never be able to find someone that understands that. I don’t want a perfect person. But I do want a compatible person. And I do want someone who tries hard to always be their best. Is that fair?

I am constantly asking myself the question, “Is that normal?!” because I’m so convinced of an idea myself, but I forget that not everyone looks at life the way I do. So I feel incredibly isolated and lonely, because I feel like I would only ever know if I was “normal” or “reasonable” if I knew another INFJ to compare myself to. But we’re so rare! Chances are I have met at least one in my life, but I sure don’t know any personally. It’s incredibly frustrating, and it makes me start to feel defective.

I’m a right and a left brain-ed thinker. I am very emotional and feel things a lot, but I ALWAYS have a reason for feeling what I do. I always have some type of logic behind every feeling, and I don’t come to conclusions quickly. But as soon as I feel I’ve gathered enough information, I feel very strongly. It’s rationality and emotion combined. And that is so freaking hard to understand in myself sometimes.

Why i am so angry still?

Okay, I’ve been up all night thinking about the last 12 hours+ and how upset it has made me. I’m going to tell you guys my story which only a hand few of people know about.

As a teenager I was a dancer. Hip Hop, Jazz, Ballet, and free style. As a dancer you are held to a certain body type standard and you are pushed to uphold that standard if you want to make it far. I was always a little girl and I never had a problem with my weight until i was 16. When I turned 16 I wanted to start doing competitions and my group of friends decided to try out for this dancers group. This group was a highly ranked group and you have to be the best of the best to join. Well after months of blood, sweat, and tears, our time came to try out. Everything went fine until the lead girl stopped me and said “Unless you loose a few pounds, you wont make it here. Try again in a few months”. At these try outs you didn’t get weighed, everything was done with the naked eye. I was 16 and she was a girl in her early 20′s, sound familiar?. I looked up to this girl and she was telling me I wasn’t small enough to be on this team. I took it hard. I never had an issue with this and started to think that maybe I did weigh too much to be good enough. I then started to work out more and more. If you ever worked out you know a lot of the time you don’t loose weight if you are already super active, you start gaining muscle weight. That of course made me freak out and start to look into other ways to loose this weight. By the time i was 17 I had a full blown eating disorder because that was the only way i could loose any weight. I counted calories and would skip meals if I was any kind of bloated. It wasn’t good at all. I’m now 22 and I still struggle with it. Everyday is a struggle to look in the mirror and be okay with what i see and that I’m good enough the way I am.

Briana and Danielle (and many others out there) are out here doing the exact same thing. Don’t try and argue with me because they are. they are telling girls they aren’t “bikini ready” or able to wear midriff/crop tops unless their tummy is tiny and flat like theirs. they are telling girls that for you to be deemed beautiful you have to be paper thin. That is not okay. Most of the people following them are teenage girls just like i was and they are in their 20′s with these girls who look up to them and they are telling them to use this product to get your bikini body. NO!!! Don’t they remember how hard it was to be a teenage girl? I don’t want anyone to have to go through what I did because some idiots are promoting bullshit beliefs. You are beautiful because you are YOU  and not because you look a certain way. Since 2014 I have been able to tell myself this and it be enough because its true. I find it disgusting to put this type of pressure on teenagers, period. They have a platform that they could be using for FAR better reasons than to promote irresponsible behavior like this. They, to begin with, are beautiful and don’t need this but here we are. I can not stand by this in any way because I’m a prime example of what pushing said beliefs on young impressionable mind can do. They need to stop and reevaluate their moves here. I hope someone tells them just how wrong this is for them to do and they start to promote better things than these beliefs.

Please always remember no matter what size, skin color, hair color, eye color, clear skin, not clear skin, tall, short, and everything in between that YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL BECAUSE YOU ARE YOU!!!! There can NEVER be a more BEAUTIFUL YOU!!!

My asks are always open if anyone needs someone to talk to about anything.


Lots of love,

Gin