i swear to god if anyone beat me im going to scream

100 Dialogue Prompts: Part 2

We did it amigos. Another list! I am so grateful that you all are sharing your ideas to help inspire others (faith in humanity restored)

  1. “Where is my fucking pudding?!”
  2. “I thought we agreed to never use butter for that reason again…”
  3. “Well if it’s the guy who never shuts up about toilet paper!”
  4. “Honey, did you see my sniper rifle?”
  5. “Oops…”
  6. “God damn it he died. Whatever. Just leave him there.”
  7. “Listen, I know you’re upset, but please put down the baking soda before someone gets hurt.”
  8. “Look, about the monkey…”
  9. “I don’t understand! I only used a finger.”
  10. “It’s not as hard as you think, I promise.”
  11. “well this is what i call hell of a night”
  12. “How could an entire school disappear?”
  13. “What do you mean the brownies are "not quite brownies”?“
  14. "Yes, I understand that its cool, but why does your toaster have wings?” “Well its alive of course. It flies.”
  15. “Don’t turn that on!”
  16. “Wait…I’m also- technically- underage and you’re a stranger…should I be screaming also?”
  17. “I though you meant "literally” metaphorically. “
  18. "Ok so don’t get mad but I might have started a war.”
  19. “Good morning… I see the assassins failed again.”
  20. “You’re a murderer, how are you working at a hospital?”
  21. “That cat just stole my cereal!”
  22. “Did you see that? Please tell me you saw it.”
  23. “Hey, can you stop shooting people right now? We’re trying to sleep.”
  24. “THIS IS WHY WE CAN’T HAVE NICE THINGS KEITH!”
  25. “If you think I’m leaving you and your demon eyes and evil horns you’re wrong.”
  26. “What do you mean, this isn’t Earth?”
  27. “Damn it, ____! Not peanuts again!”
  28. “Why did I just press the big red button?”
  29. “So tell me again why this dead body is being sent to Goodwill?”
  30. “Lucifer, I know that we said we would share rent but you never said anything about your brother living with us.”
  31. “God dammit, I’m supposed to be a bat! Why the hell am I a possum, Karen?!”
  32. “Sarah, where’s the dog?” “Up in space?”
  33. “You had only one job and it wasn’t even a difficult task, but seriously, how did you end up like this!?”
  34. “Well I never said I WASN’T going to kill the bartender …”
  35. “I mean, it was only a small eldritch being, so it wasn’t that bad…”
  36. “Hold me back bro!”
  37. “I think there’s a new lifeform evolving in my fridge.”
  38. “WHAT THE FUCK?!”
  39. “Can we have lunch now, or do you still want to continue looking at dead people?”
  40. “I can’t believe you ate my cheese…we’re over”
  41. “Sometimes I wonder why we’re still friends.” “Because I turned you into a cyborg after being shredded by an explosion and you owe me.” “…Fair enough.”
  42. “Well, I didn’t quite expect to wake up pregnant either and yet… here we are, so can you please pass me that can of bread?”
  43. “Ok, I know I said ‘You can throw a hairbrush at them’, but I didn’t actually mean it!”
  44. “When I told you to feed the dog I didn’t expect you to feed him the neighbors cat.”
  45. “Clearly, you’ve never gotten rid of a body before…”
  46. “This sort of thing never happened when I was dating your brother.”
  47. Sometimes, I wonder about you. And then I worry.“
  48. ” Wait, wait, wait, start from the very beginning. how did you manage to set the house on fire with that??“
  49. "For fucks sake, dude, how many times do I have to tell you that that’s not what penises are for?”
  50. “One woman’s terrorist is another woman’s freedom fighter.”
  51. “This isn’t right… the humans shouldn’t be able to move on their own.”
  52. “Why is unicorn blood on our shopping list?”
  53. “Must you unhinge your jaw like that when you eat? It’s disgusting.”
  54. “You’ve violated the law, my trust, and your friend. Tell me, why should I believe anything you say?”
  55. “No, no don’t open the fridge, I need to keep they eyeballs cold.”
  56. “did he break his jaw again by falling down a flight of stairs?” “Passive aggressive much?”
  57. “For the last time, put the declaration of independence back!”
  58. "That isn’t permanent, right?”
  59. “You know, ripping someone’s beating heart right out of their chest with your bare hand looks cool in anime, but irl it’s just unsanitary…”
  60. “She didn’t tell you” “Tell me what” “He’s dead”
  61. “But his dad is an asshole–” “HIS AUTHOR IS AN ASSHOLE”
  62. “You are here and you haven’t tried to kill me yet. You must want something from me.”
  63. “The salesperson made a flying tentacle monster sound a lot more alluring, I swear!”
  64. “Okay…the radiator just growled at me”
  65. “Dude, were you listening to me? Why are you barking?” “I’m not barking. I thought YOU were barking!”
  66. “How did you get that bump on your lip”
  67. “Buddy. You need to chill, and put that knife away before I get out my gun.”
  68. “ ” I dare you to take your shirt off" “ no” “ I doubledare you” “No” “I tripledare you” “ god dammit Steve , im not wearing a Shirt!”“
  69. "Why the fuck are there founding fathers in our living room”
  70. “Girls only say 'I will not dignify that with a response.’ when they’ve done the thing you’ve just accused them of.” “Do you know this, because you’ve done it?” “I will not dignify that with a response.”
  71. “They think we’re terrible but really we’re only mediocre”
  72. “You’d think by now we’d stop bringing death into these things. Look at them, they have anxiety!”
  73. “Ok, first of all asshat, stop touching me. Second, that is never going to work out! Third, stop TOUCHING me.”
  74. “So if I do understand, you’re telling me that you created insects robots. The same one that destroyed the city. ”
  75. “Why is THIS in your fridge? This is some serious contraband.”
  76. “Please tell me you’re joking about marrying the bastard’s son we call Satan.” “ Don’t talk about your mother like that!!”
  77. “Did you explode the microwave again?!”
  78. "Honey where’s the dog?” “Like I said, I’m making a smoothie.”
  79. “Fifteen bucks you can’t hook up with Satan.” “Make it twenty.”
  80. “I don’t know, maybe because he has some semblance of taste?
  81. "What could possibly make you think eating three tons of cheese for the mice in radiation-test labs was okay?!”
  82. “Who actually let the dogs out?”
  83. “Hey, you don’t know how many bodies are buried in my backyard.”
  84. “I told you to kill me.” “I did. Just this morning.” “Well, shit!”
  85. “So… This isn’t the end, is it? I mean I still want to hang out with you at least. Maybe go for another space adventure, hm?”
  86. “I’m sorry, it was the HEAT OF THE MOMENT,”
  87. "Hey, wanna go out for a romantic moonlight killing spree?”
  88. “So, you’re into …..? Huh, I never would’ve known.”
  89. “Did you hear that scream?” “Yes, I’m the one who screamed”
  90. “What are you doing?”
  91. “But really, why would anyone need two dozen armadillos?”
  92. “You can’t keep 'solving’ your problems by going to another dimension!”
  93. “I still can’t believe you assassinated a unicorn.”
  94. “Wait, you have FOUR knives?” “No, no. I have four knives ON me.”
  95. “I’ve killed a man using only a copy of Hamlet and a computer mouse. I am NOT afraid of you!" 
  96. "What the hell are those?”
  97. “Are you sure you’re not an arsonist?”
  98. “I know, right? You’d suspect any of them of secretly being an alien, but not…”
  99. “Why didn’t you stop?”
  100. “So, start explaining why there are dozens of puppies in my guest room.”

Let’s make another list. Part 3! Leave a reply and don’t forget the double quotes “”. I want to give everyone a chance to contribute to our community. So as always, one prompt per amigo. Dankje! 

Take A Hint

Lin Manuel Miranda x fem!reader

Warnings: swearing, tiny suicide mention

Authors Note: im really sorry, check my future posts for a sorry explanation as to why I’m such a dick lmfao

You pressed your ear to the door, straining to hear the soft voices from inside. Everyone from the cast had seemingly disappeared all at once, and you found yourself wandering the halls till you saw an unfortunately tall Daveed Diggs slipping away into Lin’s dressing room.
“Can’t seem to figure it out…”
The voice quieted, and then they were all speaking at once, making it insanely difficult for you to keep up.
“Maybe if we…”
“No we’ve tried that…”
“It’s a possibility…”
You could identify the angelic voice of Pippa as she called order to the disorganized meeting, and she hushed everyone suddenly.
You heard footsteps approaching the door, and you quickly jumped back and sprinted around the corner.
Pippa’s head poked out from behind the slightly ajar door, and she looked from side to side, searching for eavesdroppers.
Finding none, she shut the door with a definite click, and the voices resumed talking.
You tiptoed back to your dressing room, and picked up your phone, debating on calling someone and asking where they all were.
Deciding against calling, you clicked on Lin’s contact and began typing.
~
“Oh my god. Guys Y/N texted me!”
Talk stopped, and immediately everyone was crowding around the phone, screaming to know what she said.
Pippa shouted over the mess of people to quiet for a moment, and looked out the peephole once more to check if Y/N was lurking.
“We’re good. Go on Lin!”
Lin opened the message.
“Hey b! Where’s everyone at? I’m lonely :(”
There was a beat of silence, and then the loudness resumed.
“You’ve got to go to her dressing room.”
“Are you crazy? That’d be suicide!”
“Well, are you just going to let her sit around and find a new guy?”
Lin ran his fingers through his hair, and called for order.
“You guys, I’ve been thinking. As much as I really hope that this isn’t true, what if she isn’t into me? I mean, I gotta respect her decision and not be a dick about it and keep flirting with her.”
Everyone turned their eyes toward Jasmine, who was Y/N’s best friend.
“I mean, it’s not very likely.”
She chewed on a fingernail, nervous as she spoke quickly. She felt immensely guilty for betraying her best friend like this, but it was for the good of Lin and you both.
“She talks about you all the time, and she’ll sometimes be smiling down at her phone and when I ask her what she’s looking at she’ll say nothing, but when she gets up and leaves her phone with me I’ll see she was looking at your Twitter. I think she likes you, but doesn’t think you like her back.”
Everyone groaned, as it seemed they were back to square 1.
“Can she not take a hint? God, of all the things that I did I thought she’d at least have some wisp of knowledge by now!”
Oak gestured towards Lin’s phone, the messages app still open.
“Are you going to leave her on read?”
Lin’s eyes nearly bulged out of his skull.
“SHIT!”
~
You set your phone down, exhaling slowly and tapping your foot.
It had been exactly 12 minutes since you’d sent Lin a text, and he saw it 10 minutes ago, but hadn’t replied.
You paced around your dressing room, hands clasped behind your back as you crossed the room back and forth.
You were just turning on your heel when your door opened, causing you to jump back quickly to avoid the tops of your toes to be scratched.
A slightly disheveled Lin stood at the door, about a dozen of your cast mates standing ground behind him.
“Hi, Y/N.”
You smiled, and backed away from the door, inviting everyone in.
To your surprise, everyone but Lin walked out of the doorway, and shut the door behind them, leaving you to smile awkwardly at Lin before speaking.
“To what do I owe the honor, Mr. Miranda?”
You joked as he smiled.
“Just…”
He swallowed and looked more nervous than you had ever seen him.
“Are you okay, Lin? Here sit.”
You scooted over in your chair and gestured for him to sit next to you.
His leg pressed into your thigh, and you felt your face warming up at the sudden closeness of you two.
“I just need to say something right now, and it’ll be ten times easier to say if you don’t make any decisions till I’m done, so here we go.”
He spoke so quickly that you struggled to keep up with his words.
“I’ve liked you for a long time, Y/N. Longer than you probably know. If you even know. But no matter. You were just this sweet, amazingly funny and beautiful girl and I couldn’t keep my eyes off you since Day 1. I’ve tried so many times to express my affections towards you,”
He cringed, and laughed afterwards.
“I sound like I’m quoting a Thomas Jefferson letter. The point is, I need to know if you’ve taken the hint or if I need another gesture to make it known.”
You were at a loss for words, so you did what anyone who had a mouth but no words would do.
You kissed him.
His initial reaction was surprised, but soon he entangled his hands in your hair and pulled you closer.
You pulled away only when you heard cheers from the door, and groaned and hid your face as your fellow actors and actresses clapped and whooped.
Lin smiled down at you, making you blush and wrap your arms around him.
“I’m glad you took a hint.”

CONCERT RECAP HERE WE GO

-Honda Center was really bad at letting everyone in on time we got in literally at 8
-But it’s chill we made it to our seats in time
-Okay so they started w Not Today and I literally died on the spot
-NAMJOON AND JIN ARE SO FREAKIN TALL HOLY CRAP
-Jimin was so extra he was like a walking sin
-Jungkook was adorable and his English was so good
-Hobi’s smile literally shined its way to my heart
-Tae was SO HOT I SCREAMED
-Yoongi. Yoongi. Yoongi. Every time I looked at him I wanted to cry because I was like ???? He is literally the most beautiful and amazing man on the planet and I was feet away from him W O W
-Their solo stages were all perfect. Like literally I can’t even describe them in words
-Namjoon’s hit me so hard I started crying Reflection is so good
-The special effects were on POINT
-So they played Baepsae second and let me tell you I was NOT ready for those hip thrusts especially Yoongi’s I literally stopped breathing
-Anyways back to the solo stages
-Jungkook’s was so good his dance was AMAZING LIKE BOY CAN MOVE HIS BODY WOW he seriously did so so so good I cant
-Jimin’s was straight gorgeous like he has 0 flaws 10/10 would die for Park Jimin
-Yoongi’s made me cry also because the emotion was basically tangible. Boy is so passionate.
-not to mention the fact that they had a mini ORCHESTRA START PLAYING HALFWAY THROUGH THE SONG AND IT THREW ME A CURVE BALL I WAS BAWLING
-Literally Yoongi is perfect someone help
-Tae’s stage was STUNNING THATS ALL I CAN SAY
-Jin basically made me cry too good job with those high notes I fell over inside
-Am I Wrong was SO GOOD THEY DID AMAZING THEIR DANCE WAS SO FUN
-21st Century Girl was also so fun you could tell they were just having a blast and like they all killed me at the same time it was magical
-ALSO THEY RANDOMLY performed Dope like I was not expecting that and it was SO GOOD THE BEAT WAS INCREDIBLE
-Lost was hecka emotional my vocal line is so good
-So at one point they did this giant mashup of a ton of their older songs like N.O. started playing and I was like hOLD UP
-Like War of Hormone too I think and tons of their other songs and Kookie started rapping and I was like THROWBACK TO THE FIRST TIME I DIED
-OKAY SO HOBI’S SOLO STAGE WAS LITERALLY SO GOOD THIS DUDE WAS BORN TO PERFORM
-Like Mama was L I T and then at the end he just kind of said really quickly “THANKS MOM” and it was HILARIOUS
-Boy Meets Evil was so intense I pooped
-OKAY WE’RE GONNA TALK ABOUT CYPHER NOW AND I’M GOING TO PASS OUT
-Literally as soon as it started I was just like “oh no”
-If u didn’t know Cypher was the song I was most pumped about bc Yoongi’s rap k i l l s me
-All 3 of them were wearing these like crazy sugar daddy robes RIP
-So Namjoon comes out just blasting right
-And I fell over inside again but this time I actually died
-Like they were so freakin lit I’m dead
-Hobi slayed everyone within the first 2 seconds of his part
-THEN HOLY CRAP THE MOMENT MY BRAIN STOPPED WORKING AND MY HEART STOPPED BEATING
-YOONGI
-HE IS THE COOLEST PERSON ALIVE AND HIS FLOW IS SO SMOOTH YET PASSIONATE IM SCREAMING RIPRIPRIPRIP
-Okay yes anyways
-Cypher ended my life the end
-jk moving on before I have another heart attack
-So after Cypher I’m WINDED
-BUT THEN THEY ALL COME OUT IN THESE RED JACKETS AND IM LIKE
-oh no
-I’ve seen the fancams
-FIRE
-IT WAS SO LIT
-Like the dance break toward the end just
-J I M I N
-Also side note like most of the time when the whole group was performing I couldn’t take my eyes off of Namjoon he just has such a strong stage presence and he’s SO TALL I LOVE HIM
-okay where were we
-oh yes fire
-DEAD
-after fire they talked for a little bit and it was cute and my voice disappeared bc I screamed too hard during Cypher
-So I know I’m skipping around everywhere sorry it’s all I giant mushy jumble in my brain
-But they did Run at one point and it was so exciting bc they had giant gold streamers just shoot everywhere and I felt like I was in a movie it was so perfect
-Did I already talk about 21st century girl? I think so BUT
-It was so lit okay so lit
-So after that they talked to us again for a while and their English was so good you could tell they were trying and I LOVED IT
-BLOOD SWEAT TEARS WAS A KILLER HOLY CRAP I’VE NEVER FELT SO ATTACKED
-They looked AMAZING during it like wow the most attractive men in the world I swear
-So then Namjoon was like “bYE” and they all ran off stage and we were like ??????
-And so we did the rainbow ocean thing and I wanted to cry again
-So united and wow
-so after like 5 minutes of all of us just yelling
-They came out and did Outro:Wings and it was so good bc they were on the close stage and I swear Namjoon is so attractive help I’m swerving
-JK ILY YOONGS
-Oops ok here we go
-So after Wings they talked and again they were so good??? AND AND
-Namjoon was like “I’d like to take this time to thank my mom for emphasizing learning English because now I can talk to you guys”
-And I cried again bc Joonie luvs his mom how sweet I’m dead
-Yoongi was like “never forget me” and I was like BOI I COULDNT IF I TRIED
-Jungkook seriously sounded so fluent I was so proud
-Jimin was adorable
-Hopie was wild
-Tae was also wild
-JIN JIN JIN HE HAD THIS CUTE LITTLE PAPER HEART THAT HE MADE AND HE JUST WHIPPED IT OUT AND ALL THE OTHER MEMBERS DIED OF EMBARRASSMENT AND LAUGHTER AND I WAS SCREAMING
-Jin is so so so funny and cute
-Rapmon looks amazing in baseball hats
-So then after they talked rapmon was like “Kay last song”
-And again we were all like ??????
-But then 2!3! Started and I was like
-Here come the tears
-Like they were all just standing in a line on the close stage and they were so emotional I was so emotional everyone was emotional
-Jin hit those high notes like a god
-Jimin hit those high notes like a god
-Tae and Jungkook ended my life too
-Rap line was so passionate I could see Yoongi’s neck veins
-So after 2!3! Namjoon’s like “Kay last song” AGAIN
-and I was just like STOP LYING
-And then Spring Day started playing and I just lost it
-It was so emotional
-They were so beautiful
-Oh yeah and at one point You Never Walk Alone was playing while this video played about how all the recent concepts are intertwined and IT ACTUALLY MADE SENSE
-It was talking about how it was seven boys with one heart and one boy with seven hearts and they all reflected each other and were only happy and able to smile when they’re together IM SOBBING
-That probably made no sense to u guys I’m sorry
-After Spring Day ended they all came out on the stage and ran around and smiled and danced and were super cute and
-I just couldn’t believe I was actually there
-With them
-Just
-wow
-I’m so grateful
-so so grateful
-They stayed and ran around the stage for a good ten minutes and then it was all over
-My friend and I were just in shock we sat there dying for like fifteen minutes after it ended
-THEN OKAY ARE YOU READY FOR THE CRAZIEST MOMENT OF MY LIFE IM DEAD
-MY FRIEND AND I WERE WALKING ALONG THE STREET A WHILE AFTER IT ENDED
-Just like freaking out right
-and we were waiting at a corner
-WHEN BTS’s VAN DROVE UP AND TURNED AT THE CORNER
-RAPMON WAS IN THE FRONT AND HE STARED RIGHT AT US
-AND JUNGKOOK WAS IN THE BACK AND WE MADE EYE CONTACT FOR A SOLID FIVE SECONDS AND HE LOOKED JUNG S H O OK AND SO DID I
-LIKE IT WAS THE CRAZIEST THING EVER
-I JUST STARED AT HIM AND I COULDN’T MOVE
-I can’t even describe how beautiful he was even through a car window like he was FLAWLESS his eyes were so big and beautiful WO W
-I doubt anyone actually read this far so I doubt anyone will know that that happened to me BUT JDNDKDJDFMDFJEKDMSLNDKSAMKXNSLDFJEKXKDNKDJC
-Overall it was probably the greatest night of my life and totally worth driving across the country for. 11/10 would do again in a heartbeat.
-If you guys have any questions or want to freak out w me please message me!!!!!
-IM DEAD THEY’RE PERFECT
~L

Mr. Asshole (Min Yoongi X Reader) Angst

Masterlist 

Y/N goes to an all girl boarding school, so she never expected to one day have her cofee kicked over her before class by some mysterious boy. Min Yoongi owes Y/N a coffee, and according ot him, she owes him a conversation. 

Keep reading

reason (daryl dixon imagine) WARNING SMUT

REQUEST:DARYL SMUT

CAMP: GREENE FARM

I had been at ricks camp for about a week or more I made friends with some of the others. Carol was like my mentor she taught me how to be strong in a time of fear. Maggie became my best friend we would go out killing walkers who got to close to camp.

Lori was watching beth I know times are hard but hows shes acting pisses me off shes acting like a child.  Maggie and me went to check on the chicken coop talking about the only thing left guys.

“So you and glenn huh?”

“Yeah I think I love him”

“Wow maggie thats quick”

“Well you never know how long you get”

I laughed she was right thou , you never know how long you have anymore.

“You like anyone y/n?”

“Kinda I guess”

“Who? Please not shane”

“Of course not hes fuckin nuts , its daryl”

“Oh my god I knew it , andrea so called it”

I felt my cheeks go red. Was it really that obvious.  I mean yeah we flirted and a few times I crashed in his tent talkin all night. I liked him but I think he only saw me as a friend or just another stupid girl. Maggie and I collected the eggs that were there the sun beating down on me causing Sweat to run down my for head.  Once we got inside hershel offered us some water. I sat down at the table drinking my water. Shane came around the corner placing his hands on my shoulders massaging them. I stood up shrugging him off , his presence made me sick after what he did to hershels barn.

I walked outside to where carol and the others were sitting next to dale I sparked a conversation.

“Whats new everyone”

Dale smiled at me , I loved him he was like a dad to me.

“Nothing much enjoying a nice summer day”

Hes always tried to see the bright side.

Lori on the other hand didnt like me and I didnt like her.

“Dale can you see how crazy shanes becoming”

“Dont talk about him that way”

Lori now glaring at me.

“You know it’s true hes gonna end up trying to kill Rick”

“You dont know anything y/n so just shut it about shane”

“Oh sorry lori didnt mean to talk shit about your boyfriend”

She opened her mouth to scream but I walked away having the last word. I walked over to where daryl sat messing with his crossbow.

“Saw you and lori arguing”

“Eh it was nothing , pointed out shanes attitude and she got all defensive”

“Well yeah she wants her husband and he boy toy”

I giggled at his term boy toy. I sat down next to him taking out my blade and sharpening it agianst a stone.

“You’re not doing that right”

I looked up a daryl.

“What?”

He put his hand over mine sending chills up my spine. He moved my hand across my blade showing me how to sharpen it without ruining it.

“Oh thanks”

He gave me a half smile.

“Us rednecks gotta stick togeather right”

I pushed his shoulder.

“We are not rednecks daryl we are country folk”

He laughed I loved when he laughed he never laughed. Yes okay im technically a “red neck” im a gorgia girl born and raised I can hunt and clean any animal put in front of me. My mama was a great woman till she met crystal stupid shit ruined everything. Anyway thats why I liked daryl he understood my way of thinking.

It was sunset and lori and Carol made dinner. I sat next to maggie whispering secrets about everyone when shane spoke.

“Whose taking night watch tonight”

Me and daryl both raised our hands , shane laughed.

“Daryl you been on watch every night ill take watch with y/n tonight”

“Uhh alright”

I shot daryl a look of panic mixed with please dont agree he shrugged at me knowing it wasnt worth the argument with him. After dinner I sat on the hood of the blue truck watching the moon take its place. I heard footsteps turing with my blade on my hand I spun straight into daryls chest.

Both his hands found my shoulders helping me gain my balance.

“Daryl what are you doing here?”

“Makin sure your okay with him”

He looked over me to where shane stood holding a shot gun pacing back and forth whispering to himself.

“Aw how sweet big ol tough daryl cares about little me”

“stop it”

He lightly shoved me with his shoulder. I swear I saw him blush but it was to dark to be positive.  I told daryl I was fine and to go get some sleep id call him if i needed   anything.  He nodded wrapping me in to him hugging me tightly. He has never hugged me.

When daryl got shot by Andrea I screamed running to him , i stayed by his side day and night after that we became closer than ever. I thought I heard a groan in the distance standing up I grabbed my binoculars looking into the trees I couldnt see anything. Finally when I thought it was safe I put my gun back into the truck.

I yawned feeling sleep wanting to take me away. I sat on the truck my legs dangling off the the hood. I leaned back letting my back lay against the cold metal of the truck.  I felt a presence I looked up seeing a manly figure sliding his hands upu legs grabbing my belt loops making me sit up.   I smacked the hands away laying back down closing my eyes. I figured it was daryl making sure I was alive.

“Did I tell you to go to bed daryl”

I sat back up to tell him but I came face to face with shane. His hands now on my hips pulling himself closer.

“Shane what the fuck get off”

I thrashed in his grip not makinging any difference.

“Come on y/n you know you want this , you basically welcomed me over laying back on the truck with your legs dangling ”

He tried to kiss me using my foot I kicked him making him step back. I stood up holding my ground.

“No shane I didnt "welcome” you so back off"

He grabbed my grabbed my arm Twisting it back making me fall to the ground. I was now on my back laying in the dirt shane got on his knees hovering over me using his knees to pin my legs and his hand to hold me arms over my head. His free hand started sliding over my shirt.

“Come on y/n i promise I’ll be better than the red neck”

His hand now about to go under my shirt I did the only thing I could with all my breath I screamed.

“DARYL!!!! DARYL!!”

Shane slapped me aross the face. My face now now stinging a tear fell down my cheek. I kept screaming despite the pain.

“DARYL HELP”

I saw shanes hand wind up to smack me agian I closed my eyes whating for impact when I hear a slight click and a deep southern voice.

“Get off her or ill put a arrow thru yer skull”

I opened my eyes seeing daryl with his crossbow right in the back of shanes head.

“NOW!”

Daryl yelled at shane, shane threw his hands up lifting himself off me. I stood up running over to hide behind daryl, he stepped in front of me keeping his crossbow pointed at shane.

“Y/n go back to my tent ill be there in a min”

I nodded running to daryls tent, I heard a bunch of yelling between him and shane to far to hear clearly. I heard a fight break out I got outta the tent looking ovet seeing daryl and shane full on fighting throwing punches , shane tackled daryl to the ground hitting him over and over. I grabbed my blade running as fast as I could. By the time I got there rick pulled them apart. Shane still yelling as daryl got up bleeding.

“Fuckin redneck piece of shit white trash”

He kicked dirt at daryl I ran over grabbing daryls arm letting him lean on me. Lori cams out screaming that it was my fault shane got hurt I felt my rage surface.

“You know what fuck you lori , im tired Of your shit , I love rick , I love shane Fuckin pick one ya slut”

She stood there speachless everyones eyes now on me I heard daryl chuckle behind me. Must of pissed shane off cause he screamed agian.

“Shut the fuck up redneck”

I pointed my rage at him walking over I let a sweet smile spread across my face before I booted him right in the groin. He feel to the ground holding his jewels.

“Dont call him a redneck again damn pig”

I grabbed daryls hand taking him back to his tent to clean him up. He fell down into his tent wincing in pain as He hit the ground , I climed in aftee zipping up the door.  I grabbed  ace bandages wrapping his swollen bloody knuckles. I cleaned up his face smiling at him not letting him see that seeing him like this killed me. After I was done cleaning him up I sat against the door rubbing my temples.

“Ya alright there?”

“I guess , I might have to leave the group I cant deal with this shit”

Looking over I saw daryl staring at me wide eyed.

“You cant just go y/n ”

“Pretty sure im not wanted after that whole scream fest”
Well if ya go im leavin with ya”

“Daryl you dont have to do that , you have a place here and they need you here”

“Well I need you here”

I stopped talking looking at him , did he just say he needs me here?.

“Daryl you dont need me here , you have beth and carol to look after”

“Well if you leave im leavin end of story im not lettin you just walk away from me”

I fought back the smile thats spreading across my face. I looked over at him but he had already laid down on his stomach his head  turned away from me.

“Well if ya go im leavin with ya”

“Daryl you dont have to do that , you have a place here and they need you here”

“Well I need you here”

I stopped talking looking at him , did he just say he needs me here?.

“Daryl you dont need me here , you have beth and carol to look after”

“Well if you leave im leavin end of story im not lettin you just walk away from me”

I fought back the smile thats spreading across my face. I looked over at him but he had already laid down on his stomach his head  turned away from me.

I crawled over straddling his lower back I began rubbing his back and shoulders. I laid my chest to his back letting my head rest between his shoulder blades listening to him breathing. I sat up  removing his leather vest i started rubbing his back again. I ran my fingers up his shirt to rub his back I started to try to remove his shirt when he flipped over throwing me off him.

“Stop y/n ”

“Daryl I was just rubbing your back”

He turned back over , I grabbed his shirt lifting it up reveling scars and burns all over his back. My hand coverd my mouth in shock I didnt know much about his past except thay his brother is a ass and his dad was a horrible man.

He sat up pulling his shirt back down he looked at me as if I was gonna run
Away from him.

“Daryl I”

He cut me off putting his hand over my mouth.

“Dont just dont”

I pushed his hand away from my mouth grabbing his shirt pulled him to me pressing my lips to his. He grabbed my shoulders pushing me back.

“Y/n you dont have to ”

“Daryl you want me to stay , give me a reason to”

He wrapped his hands around my waist pulling me to him His lips met mine , I wrapped my hands around his neck pulling myself onto his lap. I ripped open his shirt showing his perfect chest I trailed my fingers down his chest he pulled me deeper into the kiss running his tounge along my lower lip, I open my mouth letting his tounge explore my mouth.

His fingers trailed down to my shirt knowing he was hesitating I lifted it over my head. His lips moved to my neck biting and sucking leaving a trail of small purple bruises. I moved his hands over my breast his thumbs sliding over my nipples , he kissed his way down his mouth taking in my nipple he flicked his tounge causeing me to moan grinding into him I could feel his cock through his pants.

Pulling his mouth off my breast , I brought him back up to my lips kissing him roughly, I wrapped my hands around his neck pulling him down so now he was on top of me. Using my free hand I unbutton my pants shuffling them off. His eyes flash to my panties and back up to my lips , sitting up he undid his pants leaning back over me he hooked his finger into my panties sliding them off in one swipe.

His lips went to my neck agian biting me his free hand now rubbing my pussy causing me to buck into his hand , he stuck a finger into me.

“Daryl oh god”

Biting my lower lip I could see him smiling such a devily sexy smile. He leaned over me whispering into my ear

“What do you want y/n?”

I wrapped my fingers into his hair pulling him to my face.
     
“Daryl I want you to fuck me now”

He smiled pulling his finger outta me. Grabbing me hips he slid into me making me gasp scratching his back.  God he was huge. When he felt that I adjusted to his size he thrusted into me he lifted one of my legs putting hit on his shoulder allowing him to go deeper. He gritted his teeth every thrust.

“Harder please daryl harder”

Grabbing my hips he slammed into me hitting my spot I screamed as he pounded into me.

“You like that?”

“GOD YES”

He fucked me hard every thrust hitting me just right. I felt myself about to cum I tightened around him he bit into my neck sending me over the edge I cam around him squirting and bucking underneath him. He pounded into me hard and faster

“Im close ”

He picked up his pace gritting his teeth I felt him cum inside me I couldn’t help my self from screaming so everyone could hear.

“GOD YES DARYL”

He rolled over to my side he began laughing.

“Whats so funny?”

“Never thought that would ever happen" 

I sat up covering myself with his vest. I kissed him once more before I noticed the sun was up. We got dressed walking down to where everyone met for food , all eyes on us no one said anything not even lori. I went and sat next to maggie who smiled winking at me daryl came over picking me up and sitting me on his lap.

Damm it he gave me a reason

anonymous asked:

secret agent/spy/gang/mafia/kingsmen au :^)))) I LIVE FOR THESE BADASS SEVENTEEN AUS FJSHJSHDJ

S.Coups:

  • proud leader of his gang
  • he’s strong and quick witted
  • he is strict with the other members so if they fuck up they probably get a beating (it’s always hoshi OTL)
  • other than that he is happy go lucky
  • basically two faced

Jeonghan:

  • jeonghan is the quiet one
  • very stealthy though
  • HE WEARS HIS HAIR IN A BUN BECAUSE IT ISN’T ALLOWED DOWN
  • *SCREAMING*
  • all the boys are not supposed to have hair past a certain length but jeonghan doesn’t want to cut his hair so he puts it up
  • s.coups loves this boy so if jeonghan messes something up he is let off the hook

Joshua:

  • josh is a sweetie ahh omg like always
  • but when it comes to missions he is so fucking savage like
  • #unleash the hong
  • he didn’t want to join the gang at first but he is close to jeonghan so he kinda persuaded joshua to join since he didn’t want to be alone
  • now he is all for it like “fuck yeah i’ll kill that guy”
  • but not with the swearing
  • it’s actually “of course seungcheol :)”

Jun:

  • seungcheol uses jun to seduce enemies
  • he is really playful
  • BUT HONESTLY JUN IS A TOTAL PLAYER I SWEAR TO GOD THERE ISN’T A BITCH IN SIGHT HE HASN’T FUCKED
  • well they are actually all dead but  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
  • ‘hot girl big money’ is his motto

Hoshi:

  • I CAN’T IMAGINE HOSHI IN A GANG
  • not really a member of the gang
  • they use him as a distraction
  • usually stops focusing on the mission and starts making friends
  • like i mentioned in the s.coups on this poor bby gets beaten for it :((

Wonwoo:

  • pretends that he is a good gang member but in reality he is just as shitty as hoshi
  • wonwoo is serious by himself but when he is paired up with mingyu they don’t take anything seriously
  • which leads to seungcheol lecturing them
  • he’s usually super duper mysterious and dark but when mingyu comes in the room, he’s smiley and happy

Woozi:

  • HAS NO CHILL
  • WHATSOEVER
  • aggressive smol
  • sometimes acts like the boss and seungcheol gets pissed but doesn’t do anything cause this boy nuts af

DK:

  • obviously a ball of sunshine but is serious when he needs to be
  • likes to goof off
  • playful with anyone younger than him but is respectful to his hyungs
  • the only normal member pretty much

Mingyu:

  • mingyu just fools around most of the time tbh
  • especially with wonwoo(who would of guessed)
  • hates being serious and he is really fuckin lazy
  • seungcheol made him go on a mission one and he didn’t even do it
  • just went to the convenience store to get snacks

The8:

  • poor boy basically got dragged into the gang
  • forced to fight enemies from other gangs and he hates it
  • but is always praised by seungcheol and gets all happy and he thinks “maybe joining this gang wasn’t that bad of an idea”
  • then he has to go on another misson then he is like “okay never mind”

Seungkwan:

  • he makes everything a game
  • like nothing is serious
  • even when he is killing someone
  • he just sings a lot and tries to speak english to fuck with the people
  • but he never says anything correctly

Vernon:

  • this kid just wants his money
  • money makes the world go round and he knows it
  • he aims for the rich bitches 
  • dresses in suits and expensive shit and looks hella fly 24/7
  • major fuckboy tho lol
  • he only wanted to be in this gang so he could get more money for equipment for his shitty mixtapes he posts on soundcloud
  • probably apart of a super petty af gang full of 16 year olds 
  • but moved up in the ranks and now works for s.coups whO WORKS FOR THE MAIN MAN JYP JESUS FUCKING CHRIST

Dino:

  • dino was like FUCK YEAH A GANG IM GONNA BE SO COOL AHA YEAH
  • but when he joined he was scared shitless like why did i do this i want my mom
  • he basically stays behind and watches for the most part
  • when the guys go out to do something, they usually come back to the hideout being spotless and dino’s stitting on the floor asking his hyungs how it went

okay that took me such a long time to type out but it’s worth it

- dad and jispoon

anonymous asked:

can you do one where your on your period and Pietro read that orgasms help with cramps so you guys fuck super hard and tough and he's cursing in different languages?

gaah i don’t write smut but here we go kids

“Pietro?” you call. “Can you-ow-come here?” you wince, cramps running through you. 

Pietro’s at your side in a second, or anyway, at the couch’s side. “What is it, luna mea?”

Keep reading

Self Defense

Words: 1029
Warning: Spoilers from 5x05
Summary/Request: Y/N was with Stiles when Donavon when he attacked him.

Keep reading

As We Break

This is for the anon from today! It isn’t really like your prompt, because you came to the wrong person if you were looking for fluff. But it still has a lot of Syndisparklez!

This was written with help from dawnleafxoxo

Love yah anon

(Sorry I can’t put a more thing, it just deletes all the text below)

Ianite had summoned him, without warning, or reason again. She seemed to do this whenever she wanted, with no thought to what Jordan was doing or if he even wanted to. He got frustrated sometimes, when he was working on something or talking to someone. He sighed as he appeared in front of the all too familiar house and knocked in the front door.

[Jordan’s POV]

I hoped she actually had a reason for dragging me to her this time. I had lost too many items to explosions and things expiring. I had lost too many hours of work and dedication because of her, but I never said anything, because she was my god and I was meant to do what she said.

She wasn’t like my Ianite, she was more needy and childish. She needed near constant attention or she would be doing something she shouldn’t be doing. I had wasted too many hours chasing her and tracking her down, only to find her talking to someone.

She didn’t respond to my prayers, nor did she understand how I felt. She thought that all I needed was things to keep me happy, but I needed more. I needed interaction which I hardly got anymore because she took up so much of my time.

I had been ripped away from my sleep too many times to count and I always felt like someone was watching me, which was scary in its own thought. I seemed to be more lucid than before and i sometimes I didn’t have to deal with her.

Tucker and Sonja had been dropped into a world where their God was power hungry, but rarely showed his face. Dianite seemed mostly the same, if not more bearable. While my god seemed to be a child with a short attention span. It seemed to me that I had drawn the short straw.

I walked into the house and called out for her. She didn’t respond, as usual. So I was stuck with the task of locating her and finding out what was so important that I needed to be pulled away from my work.

Her house was small from the outside, but inside it seemed massive. It took a while to find her, but in the end I did. She was curled up in a ball on her bed, and a picture frame had been smashed against the wall. She did this too much, cried over her lost Spark. I understood her pain, but ten years was a long time. I know that they were married and together a long time, but it still seemed very over the top to me.

I slowly walked over to her and sat down next to her on the bed. I didn’t want to disturb her, but I needed to know why she brought me here. To see if it was important. She was still sobbing, it broke my heart a little, but she really needed to grow up, he was gone. I still hurt from Capsize, but not enough to reduce me to a puddle every time something reminded me of her.

“What’s wrong M'lady?” I asked quietly, not wanting to upset her anymore than she already was.

“Why can’t you just be my Spark?” She sobbed. Her words were a bit unclear, but I understood what she was saying. I sighed quietly. She often asked me this question, and each time I never had an answer for her.

“ANSWER ME. WHY DID YOU HAVE TO TAKE MY SPARK AWAY?!” She sobbed, weakly hitting me on the chest. She had started to wipe away her tears, I could see the anger forming in her eyes. I was hesitant to move, because I knew she could break down at any moment.

“IM SO SICK OF YOU. ALL YOU DO IS REMIND ME OF SPARK. IM SICK OF IT.” She yelled at me. I stood up; she could seriously hurt me if she wanted to. That was the only thought running through my mind. She could do more damage than anyone else, just because of her god status.

She launched herself at me and I couldn’t react fast enough to get myself out of the way. So I was thrown against the wall, pain blossomed in the back of my head and everything went black for a second. All I could think about was the pure fear coursing through my body and how much danger I was in.

I felt a fist connect with my rib cage and pain begin to radiate from there as well. I couldn’t breath my throat was constricted and my arms felt pinned in place. I tried to wriggle out from her grip, but she wasn’t what was holding me in place. It felt like I’d been paralysed, and that’s when I realised she was using magic- and I had no chance at all of escaping her. I tried to scream at her to stop, but my throat refused to work.

I locked eyes with her. All I could see was anger and what appeared to be hatred and all degrees of sadness and emotion. I was shocked; I couldn’t believe she would do something like this. She continued to drive her fist into several parts of my body, like my chest, ribs and face. Terror was the only thing I felt as the pain faded away and I lost consciousness.

I woke up on the ground, I couldn’t open my eyes for a while, because everything hurt, but when I did. I saw that I was in the fortress of fury. I was home at least. I tried to sit up, but everything hurt too much. I started coughing, and blood came out. I was scared; I had taken quite a beating when I was still awake. My face hurt and my ribs ached. I couldn’t tell left from right, or up from down. I knew I would be stuck there for a while, because no one visited me much, and Guard Tom had taken off for a few days.

The most I could move was to curl up into a ball and try and go back to sleep, which seemed harder than moving, because of the pounding of my head. Eventually I must have fallen asleep, because the next thing I knew, I could hear voices. I hoped that they weren’t Angels, ‘cause I wasn’t ready to die yet.

The voices got closer and I sighed, at least they wouldn’t kill me, I guess. I still hurt all over, and my head hurt even more as they approached. I wanted to tell them to shut up, but I couldn’t. My voice wouldn’t work that well, considering I had coughed up blood not much earlier.

They got closer and closer- I was torn. I wanted them to go away so I wouldn’t have to hear them talk, but on the other hand, I was pretty sure I needed some form of medical help. I sucked it up waited for them to get here.

It took a few minutes, but they finally started getting closer. I sighed softly to myself. Was there anything I could have done to protect myself? I thought about it, and there wasn’t really anything I could have done.

I heard one of them call out to what I assume was me. “Hey Jordan, I need to borrow your- Oh my god! What happened to you?!” One of them started running over and I couldn’t tell what the other was doing, my mind hadn’t caught up yet to be able to match a name with the faces or voices. So I just kinda laid there.

The one who seemed more concerned start pressing on bits of my body, the pain started to radiate all over and I screamed out in pain. Why the hell did he do that? I wondered, the shock had helped me realise who it was. The idiot who decided to press against my bruises was Tom, and the other was Dianite in his new vessel.

Tom was more scared than I was when I screamed, he had jumped back and fallen onto his butt. I groaned, everything was even more sore now. Dianite had approached and asked, “Who did you piss off, Twinkle Thighs?”

I wanted to punch him really bad. “Ianite went crazy.” I whimpered, the words hurting my throat even more than it already ached. Dianite was speechless, or so it seemed. I wasn’t looking in his direction and i don’t think I could have rolled over if I tried.

“Ah. That must hurt like a bitch.” He asked.

“Shush, head hurts.” Was all I said in reply, before closing my eyes again and sighing. I swear if they tried to move me I would cry. Everything just hurt too much. Maybe Dianite could at least take away the ache.

Tom started talking to Dianite in hushed whispers, but I couldn’t make out what they were saying- and I didn’t want to. I honestly wanted to just push them out of the tower so I could have some peace. The floor was pretty cold, but it felt nice on my skin, and the dust didn’t bother me much.

I was just about to drift off for the second time, when one of them decided to roll me onto my back and press their hands into my stomach. I gave an ear-splitting scream, pain surging through my body once again.

I was going to kill whoever did that. I opened my eyes and saw a sorry looking Dianite. Tom sat me up rather painlessly, which surprised me. There was no pain in my body anymore, just a slight ache. I sighed happily. Tom sat behind me, so I leaned on him.

“Now tell me what happened. What did Ianite do this for?” Dianite asked me, sitting down across from the pair of us.

“Okay, this is what I can remember. She summoned me, like she always does. I went and found her, she was crying. Then she yelled at me and blamed me for Spark’s disappearance. Then she launched herself at me, and now I’m here. I don’t know how I got here though.” I gave him a quick summary of what I could remember, which wasn’t much.

He nodded and told me he would go investigate, before disappearing into nothing. I was left with Tom, which didn’t upset me. We hadn’t been able to spend much time together lately, as we were both so busy.

He wrapped his arms around my slightly sore body, and rested his chin on my shoulder. He sighed. “We should probably move you somewhere warmer Jay, you’re ice cold.” He told me softly, before standing slowly and picking me up.

He was gentle when he picked me up, which I was grateful for. I wrapped my legs around his waist and my arms around his neck. He went up my elevator until we reached my room, it was near the top of the tower and was much warmer.

He laid me down in my bed and jumped in next to me, he was warm. It was nice, since they rarely got to just be together anymore. Tom was always busy with Dianite and other things. And I was busy as well. He snuggled into my back and traced shapes onto my side. I finally felt happy and relaxed.

[Dianite’s POV]

I appeared at the front of Ianite’s house. I couldn’t believe she would do such a thing as to hurt her own follower like that. Entering the house, I found her pacing in her room in a fit of tears and anger. She was mumbling some angry nonsense to herself.

“What have you done?” I growled at my sister

Ianite looked up to see me. I was leaning against the wall, my arms crossed.

“I… I just miss Spark, okay?!” she hissed back at me.

I stopped leaning against the wall. “Just because you miss Spark doesn’t give you the right to abuse your champion! I thought you’d be smarter than that!” I yelled at her, it probably wasn’t the best way to get the point across, but it was the only way I had the patience for.

“How can you even stand that Mot lookalike? Don’t you feel betrayed? Don’t you feel disgusted? How can you stand looking at him?” she sneered with venom in her voice.

“He’s not a Mot lookalike, he’s his own person. I know he’s not Mot. And that’s something you need to realise! Jordan isn’t Spark. He’ll never be Spark! I’ve talked to the boy! He idolises his God, he puts her on a pedestal, while Spark put himself in the same level as you! They’re not alike at all, they have a different way of thinking!” I yelled at her. She didn’t understand that Jordan was his own person, he didn’t want to be Spark.

“WELL THEN I DON’T WANT HIM.” She roared right back at me.

“THEN STOP TRYING TO MAKE HIM SPARK!” I screamed at her. She was acting like a child!

“I WANT MY SPARK BACK. AND ITS HIS FAULT HE’S GONE. I THOUGHT IF I COULD JUST MAKE HIM ACT A LITTLE MORE LIKE SPARK I COULD SETTLE. MAYBE JUST MAYBE I COULD PRETEND LIKE SPARK NEVER LEFT. THATS ALL I WANTED.” She cried out.

I sighed. “Ianite, Spark’s gone. Mot’s gone. Everyone’s gone. That’s something we both have to live with and get over.”

I watched as Ianite sat down on her bed, holding her head in her palms, tears still streaming down her cheeks. Her breathing slowed down more.

“I’m sorry…I just… I miss him… so, so much.” she whispered. I sat down next to her.

“Don’t worry. And I miss Mot. But it’s going to be okay, alright?” I told her, trying to comfort her.

Ianite looked up at me. “…No, it’s not going to be okay. My life is MISERABLE because of Jordan, and I will stop at NOTHING to make him pay for it!” Ianite growled. She got up from her bed. “Yes… he will pay.”

“HE DIDN’T DO ANYTHING!” I exclaimed, once again angry and now frustrated.

“HE’S THE REASON MY SPARK IS GONE!” Ianite bellowed at me.

“You are being unreasonable, Ianite!” I growled, not willing to put up with much more of this.

“I am being perfectly reasonable! You’re just too foolish to understand! No.. you’d never understand. I thought you would, because of Mot, but of course my situation is different. Mot was a slave to you! Spark actually meant something to me!”

That was when Ianite struck my last nerve. “MOT WAS NOT A DAMN SLAVE. MOT WAS HIS OWN PERSON. HE WAS MORE OF A FRIEND THAN YOU EVER WERE. MOT TOOK CARE OF ALYSSA. DON’T YOU DARE SAY HE WAS A SLAVE. I TREATED HIM LIKE MY OWN DAMN SON. YOU DON’T GET TO SAY THINGS LIKE THAT TO ME. MOT MEANS MORE TO ME THAN THE TOWN YOU ABANDONED MEANS TO YOU.” I screamed at her with fury blaring in my voice and eyes.

Ianite was taken aback by his outburst, stepping away from him. She slowly processed each word. Then she smirked. “Yet I’m the only one who still cares about the loved ones we’ve lost. Not that I cared about any of the others from Spark to begin with.”

I glared at her. “Impossible,” I mumbled, shaking my head. “You’re impossible to reason with. That’s it. I’ve had enough.” And in a matter of seconds, I disappeared.

[Jordan’s POV]

I drifted in and out of sleep for a while, just basking in Toms warmth. It was peaceful, with just the two of us. I didn’t want to have to get up ever. But I knew that I would have to at some point. I was getting hungry and I knew that Dianite would show up sometime with some answers.

Speak of the devil and he shall appear, I thought as I turned over and saw him standing there. I rolled my eyes and carefully sat up, not to disturb Tom at all. It didn’t work because he stirred and woke up.

“Soooo. My sister has finally lost it. Like, completely.” Dianite said with a grim look on his face.

I didn’t know what to say. I was speechless. Tom didn’t seem very surprised, “I knew she would snap one day. It was only a matter of time. I mean no disrespect.” He said politely.

“I don’t want to follow her anymore. She’s not the god I thought she was. She’s not the one I chose to follow back then. So I’d rather follow a different God than to be subjected to her.” I mumbled under my breath.

“Are you saying what I think you’re saying, Glitter Lap?” Dianite asked.

“Yeah, I’d rather follow a God who has sense than a god who’s gone insane.” I told him, leaning onto Tom. I smiled to myself.

Tom smiled excitedly. “Does this mean you’re joining Team Dianite?” he asked.

I nodded.

“YES! Finally! I’ve waited so long for you to join us!” Tom exclaimed happily.

“You’re in for a change Sparkly Jowls. Dianite life isn’t anything like the life of an Ianitee.” Dianite said with a wink.

And boy, was he right.


-2 months later-


I stared at the workplace I had recently become very familiar with.

What have I gotten myself into?…

Teen Wolf S05E06 Review

Here’s my review on last night’s episode, “Required Reading”:

- wtf is scott having an asthma attack?!
- uh TW I think ya’ll missed an episode BC wtf
- literally what is happening
- YAS malia YAS
- the dread doctors are kinda terrifying because they can’t be defeated
- OMGSH he was having an asthma attack!
- RUN MALIA
- dude what’s with the gigantic steps
- we never should’ve read that book? Well shit this should be good
- team always pissed when I see that Skira stole Scallison’s intro
- wtf is happening at the school
- what up Toyota ad
- those are all chimeras holy shit
- awe stiles my baby
- are we really calling them that 😂😂
- Sheriff is my fave
- awe my stiles let me hold you bb
- Uncharacteristicly quiet.. What up void stiles reference
- Good point stiles
- This feels like season 2 trying to find the common denominator in all these people
- YAS MARRISH
- What I would give to do a hot fight scene w Ryan Kelly
- Holland Roden is honestly so pretty like what
- Look at Parrish thinking he’s so slick like “I don’t want your stitches to get unstitched” “hehe I’m so funny she’s gotta date me now”
- now he’s like “shit she’s hot”
- and now Lydia is like “I know I’m hot and you can stare later but now we have a mission”
- Parrish is like “stripping okay act cool act cool”
- Ouch that looked like it hurt kind of
- his hands are so close OMGSH goals
- that scene should’ve been longer 😭
- Holland is body goals
- true this book doesn’t sound like good news
- Stydia dialog is my fave
- the way stiles looks at Lydia and squints his eyes ever so slightly ugh I’m such Stydia trash
- Theo is so hot
- Bet you Theo isn’t even reading the book
- Wtf is up with Kira
- Lydia is like I don’t have time for your smart ass comments pretty boy
- Stiles is so hot
- okay but how did investigators miss the FUCKING BULLET HOLES in the window of the car?! Like hello car crash cause
- “you’re not giving up are you?” I would’ve been like excuse you, boyfriend or not, do not question me. I said I was tired earlier and I meant it so if you have a problem then build a bridge and get over it
- seriously didn’t like that line on Scott
- all ages night? For a club? OMGSH that sounds so fun
- AWE LIAM STILL PAYING HER BACK
- Nothing seriously it can’t be that bad if you’re talking to him..
- awe that was cute
- #PuppyLove. Literal eye roll
- he’s fucking adorable OMGSH I want Dylan Sprayberry as my boyfriend now
- Creepy Theo is back EW
- literally so creepy
- Kira eyelash goals
- Stiles is like bitch tf
- Stiles so done w the supernatural
- Awe she’s too sweet to be a chimera
- Rude teacher
- three years thank the lord
- dang I thought my stress was bad
- Holy shit that’s bad
- ONGSH WHAT HAOPENED
- IS LYDIA OKAY
- WHERE IS STILES
- I don’t get it I’m so lost rn
- stay in the car what??
- okay legit when I first watched the flashback scene I thought it was like Holland on an add for some other horror movie like she had done for (Annabelle or something crazy like that)
- wtf creepy
- this looks like a creepy movie trailer no lie
- OMGSH she drilled a hole into her head wtf?!
- OMGSH is that Lydia’s grandma?!
- OMGSH THE DREAD DOCTORS GOT TO HER
- the way she says that it was nothing kills me and brings me back to season 2 hardcore
- has Lydia had blackouts before??
- why are they talking about it like it used to happen a lot??
- cause I met one duh lmao I love Mason
- language trick wtf this monologue is confusing me and I’m not a fox
- or am I???
- “that’s why I can’t read it” and that’s why you can barley pass English lol
- I swear that wasn’t me OMGSH hahaha I love Kira
- panic attack?
- asthma attack seriously wtf is this episode
- IS THIS BABY SCOTT
- the dog didn’t make it wtf I’m so confused
- what did the dog do?!
- OMGSH DID ANOTHER DOG KILL HIS DOG AWE
- but why did that trigger an asthma attack??
- they should’ve had him hallucinate Allison just saying
- dude Dylan is 16 and has chest hair like wtf the guys in my school barley have deep voices
- OKAY AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO THINKS HAYDEN LOOKS LIKE SELENA GOMEZ OR??????
- she’s honestly so pretty
- I forgot about the light making the eyes glow
- Liam’s like damn it man
- Hayden is like watch this biotch
- OMGSH LIAMS FACE I NEED A GIF OF YHAT NOW
- SOMEONE GIF THAT LITTLE HEAD NOD AND LIP LICKING OF LIAMS AND IF YOU HAVE IT THEN BE NICE AND SHARE IT W ME THANKS
- trying to out do each other awe this is cute
- the fact I’ve totally been in this situation
- like legit the enemy and trying to out do each other… Yeah and I won too 💁💁😉
- Hayden is boss at soccer
- Liam is like oops my bad well I did get the point but shit I better go help him
- Hayden is like wtf
- OMGSH ARE WE FINALLY GONNA HEAR THE THING
- angry liam would be hot
- damn Liam messed her up
- Hayden is like twinsies bitch
- Seriously I love Hayden now
- scott takes his inhaler so intense like have you ever actually seen someone take an inhaler BC it’s not like that at all
- Awe Hayden is like ok ok that was cute
- YAS STYDIA scene
- Lydia is honestly so smart like I would still think it was my memory
- OH FUCK
- the #TheoThirstTrap is hella working on me like you can seduce me any day
- God bless Cody Christian
- Malia is like shit this is gonna be interesting
- if I was malia like 👅👅
- avoids eye contact to try and play it cool like I feel you malia
- I don’t know what’s better the back of the front 😩
- that ass too like Cody you’re killing me here
- seriously if Cody Christian was that far away from me all sweaty and shirtless I would’ve cried
- like how did Shelly do it
- I envy the girl who gets a hook up scene with Theo 😍😍
- arm veins 😍😍😍😩
- Seriously I want to watch this for days on end
- Malia is like just a little peak
- dear anyone that’s hooked up w Cody Christian: h8 u
- The #TheoThirstTrap is working so well like you can trap me any day 👅👅
- “look I don’t need any favors” the way he looked when he said that like ugh date me
- jawline fuck
- Theo is like “she hurt the pecks!”
- then he’s like “lol my thirst trap so worked”
- They’re sisters OMG shut up!
- $200 for a bottle of pills what
- Liam is such a puppy like uh nothing *scratches back of neck awkwardly*
- hahaha liam is like fuck yeah I got cute
- Scott’s like wtf I haven’t used this since I turned
- psychosomatic that’s a big word for you scott. Like season 1 lydia smart
- YAS A TRANSLATION
- I am the messenger of death
- well shit ya’ll we bout to die
- Yeah it does look like it’s taking over okay I’m not alone on the creepy kitsune part
- Stydia scenes YAS
- “I thought this was more of an auditory thing” “I still wanna see what I’m hearing”
- OMGSH me Af
- stiles lmao like okay bb whatever you want queen
- stiles why you leave her though since when do you listen to lydia
- it’s 😊 also 😊 a 😊 Lydia 😊 thing 😊 *sets self on fire*
- creepy dead girl behind you stiles
- see how the flashbacks look like creepy movie trailers like wtf
- Stiles don’t follow the creepy lady
- You know those don’t beep without a heart beat right??
- you know you’ve watched too much Greys Anatomy when..
- Aiden??
- Hayden OMGSH I’m screaming
- that sounds so creepy
- DID HE JUST SAY MOM
- IS THERE WHERE WE MEET CLAUDIA OMGSH IM CRYING
- “[Stiles and Lydia are] Doing what?” *coughs* each other *coughs* sorry what? 😏
- malia is like hello what
- this fool eating the power lines wtf
- maybe less lol
- awe liam is so cute
- Hayden’s outfit is cute af
- it wasn’t your fault awe
- I punched you in the face awe
- I just awe at everything Layden/Hiam does
- haha Haim.. Ok Shyanne focus
- I meant the shots 😊😊dumbass😊😊
- Hayden is so my spirit animal
- awe she had a kidney transplant
- She’s so calm about it like awe can liam hug her
- her outfit is on point
- she looks so much like Selena seriously wtf
- he’s so sad that she’s a windigo
- well she has windigo eyes
- EW that looks so cool to peal back!!
- who’s trying to hurt her? Her doctor??
- kill her what I’m so confused
- it’s the disease? What is? Dementia? What what I’m so confused
- who looks her?
- HES TEN OMGSH ARE THEY TALKING ABOUT STILES
- OMGSH SHE THINKS STILES IS TRYING TO KILL HER
- STILES MY BABY
- his shadow is his younger self watching this omfg
- HIS MOM ATTACKED HIM WHEN HE WAS LITTLE OMGSH NO WONDER HE HAD PANIC ATTACKS WHEN HIS MOM DIED
- WAIT WTF IS THAT THING ATTACKING STILES
- is that Theo?!
- the stepping on the inhaler was cool
- okay the beginning is being shown again cool but why was it shown at the beginning in the first place?
- malia not giving up YAS
- Malia’s shoes are always on point
- yeah you shouldn’t have read the book guys
- EW ew damn theo got skill
-bloody hand nice effects TW
- Stiles is like shit
- YOU CANT SAY ANYTHING WHAT
- Stiles is like uh why not got something to hide hmm???
- THEO KNOWS ABOUT DONAVAN WHAT
- WELL LIKE OBVI BUT STILL WHAT BC PARRISH TOOK THE BODY
- WAIT THIS IS SOME BLACKMAIL SHIT
- #Rude
- stiles is like bitch you didn’t
- In the next episode Stiles pushes Theo against the wall god that’s gonna be so hot
- See ya’ll next week try not to read any triggering folklore 😊