i swear i needed to poop

his lips taste like honey and earth, his breath lights a spark in your stomach
whether it’s fear or excitement- you don’t know. you never knew. 
his slender fingers up your spine, the way he says your name. the way he says anything. 
his blonde hair, those blue eyes.. so normal, so typical, but for him. they stand out. they’re unique. for him. 
so special, so perfect.
but in the end, it doesn’t matter. 
you’re his forever, remember? 
all of you. what you think doesn’t matter. 
he’ll keep you safe. 

anonymous asked:

Aah, for a radmond request, maybe do something where raymond finds out about one of rad's insecurities?? :O

Another Anon:  If you’re still doing the Radmond thing, maybe their first fight? Like, not their usual fighting but yelling and stuff Sorry this is confusing. Also, I realllly love your stories and they make me smile a lot

(yes this is my first two for one deal, I feel like these would just go together so well also fhdjsf Anon you’re gonna make me cry from the sweet compliment also I get that 100% emotional fight not physical also whoops I think I made myself cry hahA)

The cup hit the wall with a loud thud, the glass shattering on impact. The two stared each other down from opposite ends of the living room, the movie long forgotten in the background of their battlefield. Teeth were bared, hands curled into tight, shaking fists, and for the first time in a long while, it seemed as if they’d return to their old ways. Raymond was the first one to break, a choked sob tearing its way from his throat as the levity of the situation hit him like a tsunami. Rad just stood there, his body unmoving except for the slight shaking in his fists and quiver to his lower lip.

Raymond wiped at his eyes angrily, because of course, he’d be the one crying. It would never be Rad, no, not Mr. Stoic. He didn’t have any emotions at all, he was just chill all the time. Except he wasn’t. Raymond knew he wasn’t, and that was what made this whole situation so much worse. Rad didn’t let his guard down around anybody, it seemed, not even his boyfriend. This whole stupid argument had started because of that, because Raymond had the nerve to ask Rad why he didn’t ever cry at this one sad movie, and then it had all spiraled out of control so, so quickly.

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I Can’t Help Who I Love

Summary: After Hannah Baker’s death, you’re life turned to shit. Your boyfriend broke up with you, your best friend is dead… Nothing could make your life worse. Well, maybe one thing… (I swear the actual story is better than the summary!)

Pairing: Alex Standall x Reader, Zach Dempsey x Reader (platonic), Hannah Baker x Reader (platonic)

Word Count: 5479

Warning(s): Mentions of suicide, mentions of teen pregnancy, A SHIT TON OF ANGST OMG, MeGa FeeLs (( I was listening to ‘River Flows in You’. I wAS SaD sO i sHAll CONdem YOu to BeiNG Sad As WeLL))

(A/N): As you can see, I threw my feelings up all over the fic. Someone needs to ban me from ‘Thirteen Reasons Why’, Alex Standall, and angst because this is the result. Put those things together and I poop out this story. I AM SO SORRY! Also, this is my first 13RW imagine so I’d appreciate the feedback. I really, honestly hope you enjoy it, because I really enjoyed writing it. I’m actually really proud of this piece, it’s easily one of my favorites.

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So I saw the fusion and I thought it looked cool.. so I decided to try a bit of a different version..?

  Looking more like dre..?




“fuch em!”

omfg I swear to godzilla I’m gonna hug every corpuscle outta your being.


I Hate That I Love You - Part 2

Zach Mitchell x Reader

Word Count: 1,172

A/N: This is the second and final part of this post. Thank you again @sydneyhamer for requesting this, I hope you like how it came out. Thank you all for reading and for being so patient while I put this up. Enjoy!

Claire went easy on you as her assistant, knowing it was your first week. Running some errands for her was way better than cleaning up dinosaur poop, that’s for sure. She had to meet with someone today: Owen Grady. Claire filled you in on the details about him on the ride: he was the trainer for the velociraptors, Claire said it’s pretty impressive how much they respect him.

“That’s a lot of work for just one guy, he’s gotta have help,” you said. “He has help right with that right?”

Claire laughed, “Of course he has help. When working with dinosaurs, you always need help.”

Where was that help when I was cleaning up dinosaur dung, you thought. I swear once I see him again, I’m going to rip his-

Zach’s name being mentioned interrupted your thoughts. Claire was saying something but you had zoned out. “What?’ You asked, hoping you heard her right.

“I said, your mentor works for him. Zach Mitchell right?” You nodded, surprised that Zach is actually doing something on this island other than hitting on tourists. “Yeah, he cleans the treat buckets and all the gross things that come from the raptors.”

“Oh my god, seriously?” You couldn’t help but laugh at the thought of Zach doing the same dirty work that he made you do. “That’s awesome, I hope we see him doing it there. That’s perfect blackmail material right there.”

“You’re totally right,” Claire giggled with you.

You stopped laughing slightly when Claire pulled up to the velociraptor exhibit. It was pretty big, not even close to the size of the Indominus habitat, but still a good size.

You walked up to the structure, seeing the dinosaurs inside. There were four, two were green, one slightly darker than the other, a brown-ish one and one with blue stripes down its back. You climbed some stairs to your right, the landing opening up to a thin, metal catwalk that overlooked the cage. There was a man standing in the middle of it. He seemed to be talking to the dinosaurs in the cage, you couldn’t make out what he was saying though. He had a clicker in his hand, pressing it before he threw what looked like dead rats over the railing. A little gross, but whatever, you thought before looking around the place. There was a figure in the corner of your eye. It’s Zach! You immediately stepped back to hide behind a wall, peeking out just a little bit. He walked towards the catwalk a little, looking at the man standing on it. The man walked off the platform, handing Zach a bucket before walking away. Zach opened his mouth to say something to him but quickly shut it and dropped his head a little. He walked over to another pile of buckets and a wall of hoses behind them.

You walked from your hiding place slowly, starting to laugh a little as you got closer to Zach. He lifted his head, hearing your laughter and wanting to know where it came from. Once he saw you looking down at him while still chuckling, he avoided eye contact with you.

“Hello Mitchell, Zach Mitchell,” you said sarcastically, trying to suppress your laughter.

“What are you doing here?” Zach asked you, suddenly super serious.

“Now, that’s no way to greet a friend. Zach, pal, I thought we were on a first-name basis here..” You couldn’t help but smirk as you spoke to him.

Zach’s lips pressed together in a thin line. “What do you want?” He hissed.

Ignoring his question, you said, “Man, I never thought I’d see the day when the Zach Mitchell washed dirty buckets.”

Zach stood up, now towering over you slightly, because of your height difference.

“Hey buddy, maybe you should be getting back to your work there huh? Seems like it’s going to take a while..”

You resisted the urge to vomit as Zach picked up a dead rat from the bucket he was cleaning and held it in front of you. It had a little bit of dried up blood on it, making you gag even more. You turned your head so you wouldn’t have to look at the revolting thing anymore.

Now it was Zach’s turn to smirk. “What’s the matter (Y/N)? Scared of a little mouse?”

“I’m not scared, it just grosses me out. And that’s definitely a disgusting rat, not a mouse.” You pushed his hand away when he tried to stick the dead vermin in your face.

He kept trying to stick the gross thing in your face and you just kept backing away, trying to get out of his reach.

“Zach, stop.” Before you knew it, you were on the metal catwalk overlooking the exhibit.

“Zach, I’m serious- stop.” You leaned against the railing, trying to get away from him.

Your hand slipped, causing you to fall slightly over the railing. Zach dropped the rat, finally, when he saw you lean over the edge dangerously close to the raptors’ reach. He grabbed you, pulling you back onto the platform, holding you close in case you tripped again.

Zach ran his hands up and down your sides while you tried to calm yourself down. Your breathing was out of control and you were shaking like a leaf. Your eyes were closed as you attempted to catch your breath, but once your realized Zach was holding you, your eyes snapped open. You immediately pushed away from him, fuming, as you stormed off. Zach stood there for a second, confused on what just happened, before rushing after you.

A few tears slid down your face as you were walking away from the exhibit as fast as you could. Zach called your name a couple of times, you could tell he was close behind you, but you didn’t stop walking. Finally, Zach grabbed your arm, forcing you to turn around and face him.

You were tired from all the panicking you had just done. “What?” You weakly asked him.

“I-I’m sorry for pushing you over the railing back there. I didn’t mean to, really, I’m not that bad of a person.”

You rolled your eyes at his talking about himself again. “Zach, it’s fine. No one got hurt, it’s really fine..”

“But it was all my fault. I’m so sorry for putting you in a situation like that, it should never have happened.”

“Zach, seriously, it’s fine. Don’t worry about it’s not a big-”

You were cut off by Zach pressing his lips to yours. You were surprised by the kiss at first, but soon leaned into it, pushing yourself against him even closer. His hands wrapped around your waist as you grabbed onto his arms to steady yourself. When you pulled away, you leaned your forehead against his.

“So, do you forgive me?” Zach asked you.

You slapped his arm. “Yes dumbass. I said it like four times already.” You both smiled as he pulled you in for another kiss, this time deeper and more passionate than before.



I swear to heaven I don’t know why I wanted to cosplay Krista lol why I wanted to cosplay in general  So how I added filters to make it look nicer. Actually looks ugly I swear. Still incomplete, tho :B

creativepessimism  asked:

Hey guys, I needed to get this out to a larger crowd and I know my boy Pillow Poop can help with this. It's a large thing going on in the American government that's a huge scandal. A literal one that is actually bad Amc could change the world as we know it.... George Bush released LEGO Star Wars 2.(i swear to god this is a legitimate issue, please look it up)

Jesus Christ lily

the signs traveling together (part three)

*read previous parts to make sense of this*

Taurus is in a part of the forest where there are over grown trees, Let’s just say Taurus has been walking for a long time without and water

Taurus: *panting whilst leaning on a tree* must.get.food!

Taurus looks around and sees a bush and see what seems to be red berries

Taurus: *practically heart eyed and runs towards the bush* yayyyy food!


The rest of the signs (expect Libra) are all walking in the forest too as the look for Taurus

Scorpio: I still can’t believe that stupid little shit did something so stupid.

Aquarius: Not as stupid as Virgo for getting us lost right!?

*Virgo gives Aquarius a death stare* *Aquarius sticks tongue out at Virgo*

*Leo and Aries are walking behind these lot*

Leo: Cancer! Cancer! Cancer!

Cancer: *looks panicked and whispers to self* oh god! not again! NEITHER YOU OR ARIES IS THE CAPTAIN!

Leo: Shut up! i am!

Aries: No that means i am! Gemini! i am right!?

Gemini: Oh for gods sake shut up you guys! look at Scorpio and Capricorn, they look like they’re going to kill you!

Capricorn: Okay, the person to talk first isn’t going to be ‘captain’ -

Aries: Bu-

Scorpio: starting now!!

*both Aries and Leo fall silent whilst giving stares at each other like oh i’m so going to win*

Sagittarius: *begins to poke them two* you guys can’t talk right? *evil grin* *Sagittarius gets a bit carried away whilst throwing various leaves etc at Leo and Aries as they try their best not to talk*

Pisces: GUYS! GUYS! IS THAT TAURUS?! *runs of into the distance*

Scorpio: this kid pisses me of so much

Virgo: everyone does! *runs after Pisces*

*everyone follows*


Libra is alone and walking in the forest too as they look for the others

Libra: *to self* these stupid idiots always leave me, they’re just jealous! oh god! a house!

*looks at a weird cottage and runs towards it, knocks on the door (no one answers) and Libra just walks straight in*

Libra: I’m hungry! hello! anyone home!?


Taurus: *looks very worried at the others* oh … hey guys

Pisces: *runs and hugs Taurus* i found you!

Cancer: *hugs them too* i like hugs

Gemini: *hugging them too* me too!

Scorpio: great, the stupid thing isn’t dead

Capricorn: it will be dead soon…

Virgo: guys…. Taurus doesn’t look so well

*Taurus is silent as everyone looks at them and the others stop hugging them* 

everyone: are you okay?

Taurus: *looks very very worried* i - i -

Virgo: you what?! 

Taurus: i need to poop! *runs towards the same weird cottage in the distance*

*everyone follows except for Scorpio, Virgo and Aquarius* 

Scorpio: what… the hell… i swear….

Aquarius: there wasn’t anything….

Virgo: there when we came….

dhun dun duuuuhhhhh whats going to happen?!


AN: I am a lazy, procrastinatory poop (I swear, it was 10:30 just two seconds ago) but HERE IS LEE’S BIRTHDAY FIC. (P.S. I suppose this is a part of this mess-of-an-au, but all you really need to know is: Firefighter!Sam and Officer!Gabriel.)

Words: 1,300

“It was a good day,” Sam said, pinning the phone between his ear and shoulder as he pulled his gym bag out of the back seat of the car one-handedly, carefully holding his balled-up sweatshirt in the other. “Not much happened, actually. But you might be interested to hear that I did get one very unusual call this morning.” He slammed the door shut and continued, “It was from a man who was looking for his brother.”


Sam sighed. “A certain kindergarten teacher - socially awkward, loves kids, wears a trenchcoat, dating my brother, possibly related to you… you wouldn’t happen to know anyone fitting that description, would you Gabe?”

There was a beat of silence. “Whoops?” Gabriel offered, sounding chagrined. Sam snorted. “Yeah, whoops. What, did you completely forget about offering to go to Cas’ class for career day?”

“Seems like. Let me guess, you showed up?”

Sam rolled his eyes. “Yeah, I went down with Dean and Benny. We showed them the truck, taught them about fire safety, gave them all plastic fire hats and showed them how to change a smoke alarm. It was a lot of fun.”

“That’s my hero,” Gabriel teased. “Saving me from career day and saving the future generation from fires. Did you put out any college microwave fires today, too? Rescue any cats from trees?”

Keep reading


Kiwi, my beautiful seven months old poop machine grey bunny, discovered that he can just sleep whit his head onto the food recipient, so he doesn’t even need to stand up between naps for a yummy snack.

He can just fill his mouth with carrots right on the spot whitout moving a paw and then go back to deep thinking, or napping….or napping really hard. (i swear to god he’s not dead in the last one, he’s just in a comatose sleep)



         Well, today doesn’t actually mark three years; the 28th does. Either way I still can’t believe I’ve been here for three years. It’s really felt like less. I made my Rangiku blog at the end of 2012 & have been here since. There’s been ups & downs, a loss of friends, and sometimes a loss of heart. Yet, here I am & I would never trade it for anything else because it made me who I am today. You really all have no idea how much every single one of you mean to me. I know, I know, everyone says that but really every single one of you has a place in my heart. 

This fandom & myself have had some ups & downs. Three years is a long time, I’ve seen friends come & go, while sometimes I’ve had to be the one to cut those ties. I remember when this fandom only had a handful of us & we all joined a group to be affiliated, three transitions of group blogs followed. I still remember every URL of every member. This little section goes out to every single one of you that remembers that, you have the biggest place in my heart because you guys were my first friends here. I thank you for that.

Anyways, please know this is in no order, I’ll try to put the bigger list in alphabetical order but I hold no promises because I tend to be lazy.

( . @category69 . ): I still refuse to be mushy & I’ll probably be very tsundere about this. It’s no secret we’re engaged at this point. You know why I still see this place as my home? Because I met you here. If it weren’t for you, not only would my finger not have a ring on it but I feel like I would of never been able to stay in this fandom as long as I have. When I’m furious, you’re my voice of reason. My everything. You’re the Spiderman to my Black Cat. 

( . @tsumeato . ): Look guys, this girl is the mac to my cheese, the chicken to my Alfredo. She means a lot to me & we’ve been friends for a full year now. I still need to send your Christmas presents. I don’t know how I got by in life without my partner in crime. You’re the nightlight in the darkness to me & you keep my heart warm & fuzzy. The sister I got to choose.

( . @void-earth . ): I swear most of our conversations are poop stories but hey, who can blame us? I still remember our very first conversation, though it was a bit of a tough situation; we’ve been friends ever since. Terra’s also done some pretty weird shit to Rangiku. I swear. 

( . @prettywxman . ): Allie, jesus christ. You’re like Harper, a light in the darkness to me. You always find a way to make me laugh & smile, even when we’re complaining about working retail. I really don’t know what I did without you all these years. I’m so glad that we got into that skype call together that night because ever since we’ve been almost inseparable. 

( . @canniibalisms . ): Look at this dork. Another wonderful example of the ying to my yang. I just want to snuggle you up in a ton of blankets with all my cats. I’m never going to let you out of my grasp because you’re so important to me. I wish I could do ten times more for you than just be a shoulder but if anyone hurts you, just know I’ll beat them up. 

( . @insolezce . ): I know we rarely talk, let alone haven’t been friends for long but you’re also important to me. Our conversations always make me laugh, mainly because you’re a huge dork. Devpachi. I’m glad I met you when I did. 

( . @fierykage . ): Literally my twin, mainly because our birthdays are five days apart. You’ve been so good to me & I could never ask for a better sibling. I’ll protect you till my dying breath because, I mean that’s what the older sibling does right? I wish we got to talk as much as we used to but sadly our worlds both decided to be buttholes. I love you dude. 

( . @godkilller / @rxngiku . ): I’m going to group you both together because you’re a package deal. I know we don’t always talk, let alone didn’t for a long time. Yet, I just want to say that you both are important to me more than you know. I know you’ve both had it rough this past couple years, but I promise to be here for you both in the long run. You both are wonderful people, don’t let anyone dirty the diamonds that you are. 

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The signs as shit my friend texts me
  • aries: "my foot smells like dick"
  • cancer: "i need them to physically scream in my face"
  • scorpio: "instead of putt putt golf you could replace the p with a b and itd be butt butt golf"
  • sagittarius: "can i fill the pint bag with poop instead of blood"
  • capricorn: "i let him follow me so he could see how hot i look in edited pics"
  • pisces: "i got hit by bird today"


I woke up early again, not really sure why, but I had this weird sense of urgency that told me I needed to check the chat. I was thinking of it even in my sleep now. Which wasn’t really a good sign. When I was sleeping I was dreaming of it, when I was awake I was on it, when I wasn’t on it, I was thinking about it. I knew it wasn’t healthy but at the same time, it was really all I had going on so I wasn’t going to just stop. Again, I’m going to compare it to drugs. Only because I’ve never been on drugs. But it’s probably totally like drugs. The sense of impending doom that filled me as I reached for my computer kind of scared me. I almost didn’t want to open the chat. But I told myself that I was just being silly. I wasn’t psychic or anything so how would I know if something bad was happening? That’s right, I wouldn’t. 

I tried my hardest not to think bad thoughts because I knew if there was something bad, that I’d want to hang myself for thinking of them in the first place. I didn’t believe in things like that but you never know. I did everything slowly because I’m a wimp & I scare easily when it comes to things like socializing. I just let myself go at a slow pace so if there was something bad, I’d have time to react instead of just jumping in & being all shocked by it. It was really hard to surprise me because of the amount of time I spend in my head. Thinking & other things, I just get lost, never to really come out again. It’s a blessing & a curse because I can tune people out but at the same time I have a hard time paying attention. Not like any kind of attention disorder just that I prefer to be in my thoughts rather than listen to someone dribble on about nothing.

So I opened my laptop & turned it on. My mind was spinning. I took a deep breath & exhaled way too hard. It made me dizzy for a moment. I just needed to calm down, not let anything get to me. Not think about anything. Just kind of read what was being said & be chill about it. But I wasn’t expecting what I logged on to. Not in the least. I’d become accustomed to talking to the members that I’d met so far & they were all my friends now so I felt like I could eaves drop on them without feeling bad. But then there was something that made me feel like I should do that. New faces. Or names. Or whatever you want to call them. There were new people in the chat basically. I didn’t really feel a shock at seeing the new ones, because they weren’t on my list of suspect… at least not seriously. But they were still weird to see. 

Kangasoo: But you were in the bathroom for 20 minutes

Kangasoo: That makes people suspicious

Ninipuppy: I WAS POOPING 

Ninipuppy: God damn it

EvrythingsGucci: I take shorter showers than that WTF

sLaying420: what is this

Ninipuppy: it’s a chat

EvrythingsGucci: Where did he come from

galaxxy_fanfan: but you were making sounds

Ninipuppy: I swear to god I was pooping

Kangasoo: We don’t believe you

FixItWith$$: You guys

Ninipuppy: What?

sLaying420: but what is this

Kangasoo: oh lord, why did I invite him? I regret it

Ninipuppy: He’ll get bored eventually then just leave

EvrythingsGucci: Or he’ll fall asleep 

galaxxxy_fanfan: Or get the munchies

FixItWith$$: GUYS. 

ToothyChanyeol: This is quite a riveting conversation. Very hard-hitting stuff.

Ninipuppy: Heeey

sLaying420: who is that

Kangasoo: She saw the pooping part

Ninipuppy: I’m so sorry

EvrythingsGucci: I’m not

galaxxxy_fanfan: I could be sleeping right now

galaxxxy_fanfan: but you made me come on here for this

FixItWith$$$: I needed help 

ToothyChanyeol: You’re always having interesting talks when I come on.

Kangasoo: They always start shit

FixItWith$$: Language

sLaying420: seriously who is that

sLaying420: is that her

Kangasoo: Yes, that’s her. 

sLaying420: hi hot girl

Ninipuppy: Oh god 

ToothyChanyeol: Hello cutie pie :3

sLaying420: i saw a picture of you 

ToothyChanyeol: Oh really? How?

sLaying402: i was in the room when you sent it to =dj436/3ga]kjsdt-o83u85\4u

ToothyChanyeol: O_O

Kangasoo: Ignore him. He had an accident with his face & keyboard.

ToothyChanyeol: Okay… 

galaxxxy_fanfan: I’m here too. Hi.

ToothyChanyeol: I saw you, hello~

Ninipuppy: We have a surprise for you

EvrythingsGucci: Yas

ToothyChanyeol: What? o_o

Ninipuppy: Hold on ;) 

galaxxxy_fanfan: You’re going to love it

They were gone for a long time. I counted almost 45 minutes passing before any sign of them coming back appeared. But it was kind of the opposite. Two of them logged off & the other two went inactive. I didn’t know if I should stay or leave & maybe come back later. I waited because I’m that much of a desperate idiot. Not in the bad sense, really. Just in the way that when someone expected something of me, I did my best to please them. That was more true these days than it ever had been. Which was probably why I was even in this current position. I needed to know what they were doing, but again, I didn’t really want to know what was going on out of fear. What could they have possibly got to surprise me with? An emoji? Like, I couldn’t figure it out. I tried to stop thinking about it so I didn’t actually figure it out & ruin the surprise but then it came popping back into my head with that cute sound. 

ByunFanboy: I don’t know what to say

ByunFanboy: I really didn’t mean to react like I did

ByunFanboy: I wasn’t thinking straight.

ByunFanboy: I got scared. Of how I felt when I saw you.

ByunFanboy: It kind of concreted in my mind all of the things that I felt. 

ByunFanboy: I didn’t mean to make you worry or question yourself. I’m so sorry for that. Please don’t blame yourself. 

ByunFanboy: There are all these things I want to say but it’s hard to word them in chat. I wish I could tell them to you in person.

ByunFanboy: Okay… I’ll give you a minute to yell at me now~

I read this messages with a stream of tears on my face. Not at what he was saying, but that I was reading it from him. He was talking to me. He didn’t hate me, he loved me. He cared that I might have felt like shit. This was great. Not because he felt bad but because he cared at all. I’d never felt loved like this. No one had ever put so much effort into my feelings before. It was overwhelming & wonderful. I just didn’t know this was what my gut was telling me I’d find when I came on. I thought it would just be the others talking about random crap, which it kind of was. But it lead to something more amazing.

ToothyChanyeol: I don’t know what to start with

ByunFanboy: Just cover everything. Let it all out. 

ToothyChanyeol: I love you. That’s all. 

ByunFanboy: You’re not even going to scold me a little?

ToothyChanyeol: No. 

ByunFanboy: That doesn’t make me feel better, please yell at me. 

ToothyChanyeol: I forgive you, I just want to talk to you again. I’ve missed you.

ByunFanboy: I promise that I won’t do it again.

ToothyChanyeol: Good. :3

ToothyChanyeol: I was curious about something that I never got to ask.

ByunFanboy: Okay, shoot. 

ToothyChanyeol: Your username. Is it a troll or something?

ByunFanboy: One of my friends made it & he kind of did it to fuck with me. 

ToothyChanyeol: Ah, so it’s not your choice?

ByunFanboy: Nah, I just went with it. But it doesn’t bother me or anything.

ByunFanboy: We make jokes about it all the time. :P

ToothyChanyeol: I was hoping you’d say it was because of something else so I could figure out who else you AREN’T. 

ByunFanboy: Sorry babe haha

ToothyChanyeol: It’s okay. I’m just happy that we’re talking again. 

ByunFanboy: Me too <3

We did just that for almost 6 hours. I stayed up until the sun started rising. He urged me to go to bed but I refused. Not after I went so long without talking. I didn’t know if he’d disappear again for work or whatever else. I needed to fit as much in as I could. Even if the other members could see us talking about stupid shit. I wanted to talk about everything. He was just as eager & I could tell he was excited throughout the entire session. It was getting harder to just talk online though. It was starting to not be enough for me & I knew that would cause some problems. I didn’t say anything out of fear that he would feel worse. I didn’t need him to feel like this was all more his fault than before. It was my fault too. I urged it to happen as much as he did. We both knew what we were doing, as grown ups. Or sort of grown ups. Or mature idiots. Whatever was most fitting. We knew what was happening, nonetheless. 

I slid a hand through my hair as I closed my laptop & glared at the sun peaking through my window. It was so early but I wasn’t tired yet. I wanted to talk to him more, to figure out more details about him. He was busy though, he had much more going on than I did & I couldn’t tear him away from it even if I wanted to. Which I didn’t. That was his job. I wouldn’t be one of those clingy, needy girls who made their boyfriend chose. I’d never do that. I would support him through every bit of his career even if it meant being away from him. Because at some point, the distance is important. When you talk & communicate, you make a connection on a level that surpasses anything physical. Strong relationships could stand distance. That’s what we’d have. A strong, distant relationship. For however long. Even though we’d maybe never be allowed to go public with it. I was kind of okay with that actually. Then people wouldn’t be in our business.

I’d be patient with him because despite the secrets, I knew he was capable of loving me the way I needed to be. If the roles were reversed, he’d be just as good to me & I knew that. He even told me that if it was me in his place & him in mine, he’d be just as excited about it as he is now. Which I replied to by saying “Duh, a hot female star comes onto you in a chat room. you’re going to get a little excited SOMEWHERE.” then he laughed at me & it started a conversation that I’d rather not repeat. But we got each other on certain level. I know this all still sounds crazy because I don’t actually know who I’m dealing with, but it was all just starting to feel natural. It had been almost a month & I was still just as nervously happy to talk to him as I was the first day. I hoped it would stay this way at least for a little while longer.

A/N: Hopefully this is longer & makes up for the last short one. I couldn’t tell if it was actually longer but there’s more chat & TWO NEW MEMBERS OMG. WHAT. xo